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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Almost started this chapter with "Dark Storm was in a dark and stormy mood." I was told that it was a bit too much.
Think you can see the issue there.
Well this chapter had an interesting twist. Really not sure where things are heading now.
8585178
I looked and didn't see the italic asterisk end, at the end of her name. I don't know how you were able to see it but its not there now. Weird.
8585759
Odd. Well I guess if fixed itself?
This was a very, very good chapter. I completely lost myself reading this. For what it's worth, thank you for writing this. This story is really good, amazing, even. Keep up the good work!
Sounds like the spider queen is going to become the changelings
8585882
Thank you.
😭
Oh no!
I saw the word count and was intimidated and now I wish this was finished so I could just... Not have feels until next chapter.
Great one!
Freaking... I was there watching it happen!
8586214
I'm glad you enjoyed it.
This was really good. I wonder what will come next now that the spider war is finally over .
That was quite climactic. So the spiders have been cleansed, but the queen got corrupted. Another victim of the unicorns' own hubris.
So, both Celestia and Ash lost their elements... or at least, it seems like it.
The future will certainly be very interesting now.
And Celestia is still in a lot of trouble, even if she did just pretty much save everyone.
8591399
I'm glad you enjoyed my story. It took me a fair amount of time to write.
Double word again, you monster.
Cut 'her'
stones AND started
lowERing
Space after period
Without an indicator for stuttering, cut one 'just'
bRother
Celestia'S
thRough
closing period
Cut 's
I don't think anyone's ever written rules on this sort of thing, so there's no way to tell if this is or is not an age appropriate level of intimacy.
Cut 'a'
All this crap with the spiders, and there's still the upcoming war with the unicorns.
Meanwhile, somewhere else:
"I suddenly have a feeling like I will hate ponies in the future."
"Now now, I don't want you to say things like that. I mean, you are my daughter and heir to the throne, Chrysalis."
[Edit: After reading the complete chapter I see this one with different eyes...]
She had already done much naughtier things to him earlier.
(Anyone remembers which scene I am talking about?)
That was a hell of a chapter!
Both the wordcount and the content!
Brilliant work!
And I did too much quoting and commenting this time, didn't I?
Found a small error:
You renamed her Skye, remember? Now you are even confusing yourself...
8601991
Good catch with her name.
I had no idea I was channeling Star Wars so much in this one. LOL. Oh well.
Keep commenting as much as you like. I don't mind. They're fun to read.
I’m enjoying this too much. Now we have to wait. What happens next?!
I read this chapter awhile ago but I hadn't left a comment because it was a lot to take in. In a good way. I thought the part with Celestia and Ash was really cute and funny.
.
A really emotional chapter, very enjoyable.
8627067
I laughed really hard when I wrote that part. I could practically see her eyeing the two with disapproval when she said it.
8585912
possibly but i am thinking this is the beginning of the night mare spirit that will posse Luna.
As an accidental Easter egg, the white flower emoji used as a line break, 💮, on iOS contains Japanese text on the inside that translates to “Well Done” or “You did very well”.
Oh noe teh baddies got loyalty
Filly daybreaker?
9309101
Very nearly. If she took that step...