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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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https://youtu.be/GhMvKv4GX5U
SHE nipped
All but the last of these commas should go. Also the apostrophe in "mare's".
If you are ever confused as to if a comma should go in a sentence, try reading it out loud and seeing if the pause seems weird.
images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/36300000/Frozen-image-frozen-36384539-500-500.jpg
Dusty's mother means she wants Dusty to claim her instead of Sky?!
(Did I get that wrong? Probably...)
Good chapter.
Let's hope Dusty and Sky can somehow wing it. (
Nopun intended.)knew things would go to hell.
7670600 Not so much as want him to claim her, as in her wanting to keep him all to herself. A Mother's Complex that hinges on the unhealthy. She does lean towards the wrong type of love, but she's not that far as to want to mate with him. Hope this helps
Should be "wary"; they'd only be weary of ponies if that was all they'd been eating for far too long.
Yay! Nice to see Dusty sticking up for himself a bit. They've already got helicopter parents, and nopony's even invented helicopters yet!
7671679 Pegasitters, then?
Good story. Original too. Rare.
But the cognitive dissonance inadvertently created is destroying my mental health, and I'm afraid I'll have to postpone the further reading of your story once again. Progressing thought. Chapter Twelve now. Yay.
I am saying that, because there are not many stories that manage to do that to me. Not many. It is...quite hard to destabilise me in such a way... But I disgress.
Proceed...
I love the characters so far and sky is probably my favorite now