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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Too short.
I haz teh sadz.
Here you go.
Ugh, had just skip this entire chapter of garbage. Already lost about 40% enjoyment in the story just because of this alone.
8129510 Oh really? What was it about this chapter you didn't like?
8129557 I imagine the gender swap bothered him. There might have been a bit too much acceptance from the former mare turned stallion as the stallion turned mare had a massive burst of tears then felt perfectly fine with no longer having testicles.
It was a short chapter and I was a little disappointed you didn't go more into their mentalities at the sudden sex change. This is mental trauma that was glossed over. Not everyone is going to be Kaitlyn Jenner and want a sex change. I get why you did it, but the characters did not at all feel organic in their reactions.
The chapter could have gone into more detail, I think, to clear up any confusion. It's a big WTF moment and it feels glossed over.
I do hope you address this. You've done so well to this point of the story. It can be hard to keep up the same level of quality in writing. I have the issue all the time, hence why there's often a huge gap between chapters in my stories. I hope that makes sense. I apologize if I'm a bit wordy.
Just to let you all know. I also rewrote Chapter1 a bit. There were a few changes but I mainly kept the main points the same. Also added about 3000 words to it so there is a lot more content to it.
8129510 I don't much like sex changes either, but it's the creators choice.
I have to agree with scarheart here. Most gender swap stories do a really terrible job. Most just have the protagonists just accept like nothing was wrong when in real life if someone had their gender forcibly changed they would be extermely traumatized to say in the least. Most would suffer extreme depression and many would commit suicide. Just look up Iran and forced gender change. Frankly I view it as nothing better than rape.
Woah! I'm sorry, but people need to leave the real world out of this. Its just a story, not Iran. I thought to have a bit of fun with two of the characters but people are taking this a bit deep. I am not going to get into depression or thoughts of suicide for them either. Just everyone take a breath and let it out and remember that this is just a fun story and to not take it too seriously.
8129774 With the way their world's magic works, I would have thought they are used to weird things by now.
Okay, I need to voice my different opinion.
I'm seeing some bash this chapter for the genderswaping that happened. Now it's perfectly fine if this isn't your cup of tea, and you don't care for it, but I want to remind everyone that it's a small part of the story and there is still plenty of what you liked about it in the first place.
You can still enjoy the part of the story that isn't about Mustard and Morning. I personally LOVE genderbent stuff, so this was a lot of fun for me to read. I'm also really enjoying that Mustard and Morning are getting use to their new genders in a quick manner. It's not too quick, but it's not pages and PAGES of them resisting.
Look, I get the arguments of how this would affect some. Yes I know for certainty that there are many who would HATE being in a body that was the wrong gender, but there CAN be people who will choose to explore the experience. I feel this is what Morning is doing. He's enjoying his time as a stallion and eating it up. Mustard is more reluctant, but I kinda feel the fact that his 'junk' didn't work, he just might feel like he wasn't much of a stallion to begin with. So perhaps being a mare can actually be liberating.
All in all I personally find this refreshing, because I've seen the 'doesn't want to be the opposite gender' thing done time and TIME again, and frankly I'm sick of seeing it.
As for the comment from that one person who said: I see it like (A certain "R" word) No. Just no.
The R word is a terrible TERRIBLE thing. You don't compare gaining different sex organs to that. You just don't.
EDIT: and just in case there was any confusion. If that person was simply referring to the real world thing in Iran, then I retract my statement, as I'm not sure exactly what happens with that, but I'm sure it's messed up and not in any way good.
However if they simply mean genderswaping in general, like how presented in this story, is like the R word, then my statement stands.
Hmmm I don't entirely trust Eternal or Bountiful, people manipulating events from behind the scenes always leaves me suspicious.
8129557 Hate gender shifting in general. I will read gender swap a little if it's Rule63 and from the start of the story. To me, gender swap in the middle of a story just feels like identity politics which is right up there with 3rd-wave feminism and SJW's, all which need to be gotten rid of.
8130061 Of course you should be suspicious, they outright stated they did it only because of the Element of Laughter. They couldn't give less of a fuck about what kind of mental trauma this would cause.
8130110
Right, so you just going to ignore they fact they flat out said, if they simply fixed Mustard's problem, Morning would have died in foal birth?
Or the fact that Morning and Mustard are soulmates?
They did the genderswap so Morning and Mustard could not only still be together, that when they do make a foal, all three will, you know STAY ALIVE.
You're being pissy because you don't like genderswapping and are basically whining about it. Stop it. You're free to not like genderswapping, but that is YOUR opinion. I'm sorry it popped up in a story you were enjoying, but you want to know what? I'm not a fan of same sex shipping, and want to know what happens in MLP in general all the damn time? Want to know what I do about it? Deal with it.
Not my cup of tea, but others like it. I'll live, and so will you.
Maybe I overreacted a little to this chapter and for that I am sorry. I just find find the whole idea of gender swap without ones consent to be a very disturbing and (for me) nightmarish concept. I can understand why some people love it, but I can't. I still enjoy this story though and want to see how it goes.
8130137
Re-read the end of the chapter. They flat out talk about how there wasn't another way. If they didn't care about their methods, they would have just fixed Mustard's problem. Except then Morning would have died, so the fixed it so all of them could live.
How exactly is that not caring about how their goals are achieved?
8129995
He’s bitching about an often fetish‐y trope that is shoehorned into works for no reason (i.e., pretty much every instance of it where it is incidental — this story included) and the verisimilitude breaking aspect of the, until then, portrayed as normal characters reacting unrealistically to what many would consider a horror story: permanent, non‐consensual body modification.
You’re bitching about your fetish not being catered to more often with characters who share it. Some perspective, please.
It is a real thing. Homosexuals in Iran have a choice: death or claim to be transsexual and undergo mandatory sexual reassignment.
Sexual violation versus permanent, irreversible, forced sexual reassignment. We know that rape, statistically speaking, results in fewer instances of suicide compared to the amount of transgender folk who’ll commit suicide when they’re forced to live a lie, and transgender folk have decades to come to terms with living as the wrong gender… Mustard and Morning had this sprung upon them.
8130254
That’s a cop‐out. If they’re powerful enough to change someone’s sex, they’re powerful enough to fix any anatomical short‐comings. They already altered their height, mass, bone structure, and rerouted their plumbing.
8129995 Thank you.
8130174
I'm sorry but I didn't figure out your problem with this, unless your referring to the forgotten apostrophe in Meadowlark's name.
8130262
Hmmm. True enough.
8130333
Wellspring didn't change their gender. She used an existing magical pool to do it. She borrowed the pool from the Lands of Grass where the zebra live, and then sent it back. The pools uses chaos magic, which is something Wellspring can't use. As for just fixing Morning so she wouldn't die in childbirth, well the answer to that is quite simple. There is nothing to fix. It is quite possible to die in childbirth while being perfectly healthy. What they see is her fate if she should ever have a foal. What Wellspring did was do a workaround on the problem.
As for just giving them the choice to decide on their own. Well there is an answer for that as well but that would give away what Wellspring's nature is and that is something I want readers to figure out on their own. The hint on Wellspring and Age is that they are not Alicorns.
For those who may wonder. The mirror pool in "Too many Pinkie's" that she used to make copies of herself, was also one of the magical enchanted pools.
8130333
Noooo, I'm bitching because he's whining about a minor thing that is obviously not going to become the main focus of the entire story. Oh I perfectly get people aren't going to enjoy genderswapping as much as I do. That's not a problem. Imagine there was a chapter of a giant snake swallowing a pony, and all those into vore were praising it.
I'd be disgusted. I hate vore. But guess what? It's ONE MINOR PART of the story. There would be plenty that ISN'T about "vore" I could still enjoy, just as there is plenty that isn't about two genderswapped ponies they can still enjoy.
And yes, many can consider that a horror story ANNNNNNNNNND many do not. Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd not everyone who suddenly swaps genders is going to want to jump off a cliff. It happens.
As for the real world stuff, that's terrible, but it has nothing to do with this story. Let's keep them separate.
The author already explained this. It's basically as much of a 'cop out' of Celestia having to use the Elements to seal Nightmare Moon in the moon. They have many abilities and skills, but no, they can't just do anything.
That should probably be "wary"...though if he's being a pest for long enough, weary applies too.
This should all be one sentence. Also, "not".
Morning really, really, really needs another kick to the jewels, now that he's got a set. It's like he's asking to make up for a lifetime of not having them to be kicked in up to this point.
8132393 Morning is now dealing with the raging male drive of a stallion for the first time. Those male hormones can be quite a doozy when your unprepared with dealing with it. Mustard will find that mare's have their own problems as well
While I'd agree that pronoun use in this situation would be very confusing, I think you should have put an indicator earlier in the story. Let's be real, this is a big story with a butt-ton of characters, so many the reader could get mixed up on who's who, even given that these events just happened last chapter. For me, I'd appreciate something in the first few paragraphs to the effect of "she, formerly a he".
And so comes to pass the cliche beginning to a lot of porn.
Cheesy porn cliche #2.
So are these the works of Discord? They fit his MO of random.
I don't buy this. Being a guy doesn't mean you're without empathy. Morning could have shown how he's in the same boat by explaining how he had been looking forward to being a mother and feeling a foal grow in him/her, but now that is lost.
Well that's an image.
and WERE nearly
you WHAT IT's like
Yeah, what I said earlier about Morning applies here too. He-formerly-she should also be distressed over this sudden change. This happy-go-lucky attitude would be acceptable if this were just a light-mooded clop, but it isn't. There's drama with real emotions and life-or-death moments that just don't mesh with Morning's jarring attitude. Even if he's happy and is eager at the prospect of finally getting with his crush, that should still be secondary to everything else that has just happened.
Morning Sky'S
Also, holy crap. How much more meddling are these deer going to do?
problem," Age SAID
And so he became a mare again.
Didn't you already learned that? A few paragraphs above?
I look forwards to it.
Good chapter!
Can't wait to see what happens next!
Found two small errors:
Shloud be "unicorns, it"
Should be lowercase.
This has been brought up a few times so I am writing this to reassure my reasoning behind one of the characters. Morning Sky's lack of panic from her/his change was done on purpose. There are those who, when something traumatic happens to them, they go into a kind of shock, and they do everything they can to pretend that nothing has happened to them. I bet there are a few of you out there who know of these kind of people. Morning is in a state of shock and denial, but this won't last forever.
Remember, I have drama in the stories TAG, So expect there to be drama.
8130333 I totally agree on it being a cop-out. If you have the power to completely alter someone's genetic make-up to change to the opposite gender, including re-arranging all internal organs and creating brand new ones, you can easily fix what was wrong. It seems like his only problem was a case of ED.
8136638 As I already explained before. It was not Bountiful Wellspring who changed their gender. It was the magic of the Enchanted Pool that did it. Wellspring borrowed the pool from the Lands of Grass then sent it back. She cannot change a ponies gender!
Before posting, you should read the chapter more carefully. It says in the chapter that if she had simply fixed his ED then Morning would have died in childbirth. (If she was to ever become pregnant, that would have been her fate!) To change her fate, they did a workaround to go about it the other way. Literally!
8136638
Yeah! What a shame! He should have used the "fix a ponies ED and ALTER THE FUTURE SO HIS SOULMATE DOESN'T DIE IN CHILDBIRTH" pool instead.
I plead to you all. Please read what was written at the end there. Like I don't see how the author could make it anymore clearer.
They A: Were able to see a bit into the future and saw that these two are basically destined to be together.
B: If Mustard was to impregnate Morning, she wouldn't survive giving birth to a foal, possibly killing them both.
C: If both are to have a foal, said foal will lead the way to the element of laughter to be eventually be born. Something that will save COUNTLESS LIVES in the future.
D: If Mustard was a mare, and Morning was to impregnate her, they all get to live, and since they can see the future, they can see that both would be shaken by the genderswap, but in time come to accept and be fine with it.
I'm sorry the story didn't 'solved the problem' in whatever random way you wanted, but there you go.
Honestly from a story perspective, if they had just went. *Poof!* All is well, you can have foals and not die now, THAT would have been the cop out. >_>
8137214 See a little into the future? Considering they were talking about the Element of Laughter, they can see hundreds to thousands of years into the future.
8136769 And how hard would it have been to use magic to fix her problem?
I caught up. Shoot.
8137332
How hard would it be for Celestia to just fix Luna and not banish her to the moon? Very hard because SHE COULDN'T DO THAT.
You keep saying 'fix her problem too Annnnnnnd if you've been reading the comments the author has said AND I QUOTE:
All they could do is see into the future and use THE TOOLS AVAILABLE TO THEM to try and prevent the future where Morning dies in foalbirth.
To do this they used AN ALREADY EXISTING POOL simply moving it from it's original location to there, so the two could fall in, swap genders and viola! All of them get to live.
They didn't just "use magic" to fix the problem because THEY CAN'T. They aren't all powerful, they can't just do anything and everything. They have LIMITS, which is an essential part to writing characters and a story. If they can do anything, why not just raise the sun and show that unicorn what's what? Hell why not just create a foal for Mustard and Morning out of thin air? Then they don't even have to have sex!
Because they CAN'T. This sounds less like you seeing a problem in the story, and just not liking where it went so you want to complain about it.
As I've said several times. It's fine for people to not like where things go. You guys don't like genderswap. I don't like same sex pairings, but I'm not going to sit here and argue why Mare A didn't get with stallion B instead, simply because that's what I'd want.
That's why I write my own stories.
8137661 Clap... clap... clap... Bravo, simply bravo. Hammer+Nail= Nailed it!
Anyone else have any questions?
8138491
Pretty sure it was the spiders
8137641 Never fear. A new chapter is always just a week or two away.
8151157 What can I say? I'm not as young as I used to be (and I'm not even 30 yet)
How did I not notice it's an elements story?
8514533
Its an everything's story! Just wait, I'll find a place to put in the kitchen sink.
Have they tried hot water? Or is that a different magical genderbending pool?
RED FLAG
Oh... like that pool that turned the Mane 6 evil. Right.
Have you considered asking a Zebra instead?
Atch, never trust Deities, the ends always justify the means.
kinda frustrating, that sentence. the unemotive stereotype of men is more a cultural thing than a physiological one. I don't like the implication that men don't "feel" as much, though I suppose it's more a statement to the dramatic (traumatic) situation than to their ability to feel emotions.
8137661
I didn't how to feel about the pool, thank you for showing exactly how well it was used. I'm a little leery of forced genderbending so I didn't think about it as much as I could've.
Still leery of the actual genderbending though, if they had shown some desire for it to happen it would have gone down smoother for me but it happened completely without their consent. Being changed like that is not a calm transition, it's a violation of their self. I can't fathom why they are taking it like a fun novelty or inconvenience. Even if it was something they wanted, subconsciously or consciously, to be thrown without transition or choice can't be anything but traumatic. They'd have to go through a period of deep disgruntlement before they could accept and move on. The added complication of feeling sexual desire different to what they are used to (presumably, there haven't been any same sex couplings in the story so far so I assume that's the norm) should only complicate things.
I know i'm reading into things, but that powerful beings are changing people fundamentally without their input is concerning
9293136
It's not a question of being nice or accommodating. It was done with a necessity. It needed to happen so they did it. If they needed them to die, should they take into consideration their feelings about wanting to live before killing them? Perhaps that would stop wars from happening if governments thought about how the people they were going to kill felt about it before they sent solders to kill them. I'm sorry but Life doesn't take feelings into account when it decides to do things. True, those two could have spoken with Mustard and Morning, and explained the need for it to happen, but then, what would be the fun of reading about that? It's more interesting to read about a character overcoming an unplanned event or adversity.
"Surprise! Now deal with it." rather than "Have a seat. We need to talk."
I'm heartened that Mustard, and Morning's plight affected you to such a degree. It means that my characters have taken life in more than just the words in the story.