• Member Since 16th Oct, 2014

The Narwhal Assassin


Professional Shut-In, Armchair Orator, History Meme Fanatic, and Universal Annoyance. I argue about politics on the Internet to distract myself from the wreck that is my life.

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Found 90 stories in 86ms

Total Words: 2,184,493
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Twilight is getting ready to move from Crystal Prep to Canterlot High School, but there is one thing she would like to do before leaving. The words are on the tip of her tongue, but instead of using them, she decides to move forward.


Featured on August 5, 2016! :twilightblush:

Chapters (1)
E
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A hidden museum rests in the Canterlot palace, by law open to the public, by practice closed to visitors. Within its walls lie treasures of opal and gemstones, salt and wood. Shelves filled with untouched scrolls line the walls.

It is here that Luna pays her respects to Equestria's fallen heroes. Why, then, is it against her sister's wishes?

Chapters (1)
T

In another timeline, created by the meddling of Starlight Glimmer, Nightmare Moon's plot to return and overthrow Princess Celestia has succeeded. Now Rarity is at her mercy, and finds that the lonely banished princess has taken a liking to her beauty and fighting spirit. Rarity must fight with every ounce of her mental prowess to retain her independence and her sanity.

Rated T for torture and suggestive dialogue

Chapters (1)
E

Trixie Lulamoon, the personal student of Princess Luna, has finally, through a combination of reasoning, pleading, and whining, managed to convince the princess to invest some real responsibility in her, and give her a chance to show off everything she's been learning while under the alicorn's wing. Luna has appointed Trixie to be the official representative of her Night Court to the town of Ponyville, which this year will be hosting the Longest Night Celebration. Trixie is additionally tasked with overseeing the preparations for that festival.

At first, things seem to be going less than swimmingly. The catering is way too many kinds of apples, the weather patrol is far behind, the musical maestro is nowhere to be found, and the decorations could use significant toning down. To top it all off, Trixie can't help but feel that this was less an appointment to a position of real responsibility, and more an informal exile from the Night Court. Still, things could be worse: a mad alicorn goddess of fire and hate could escape from her millennial imprisonment on the sun and try and conquer Equestria.

But what are the chances of that?

A prequel to Boast Busted
Part of the Lunaverse
Now has a TVTropes Page!

Chapters (18)
E
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Long ago, the founders of Equestria built a magical portal on sacred ground, hiding their greatest secret on the other side. Generations of leaders stepped through the portal so that they might emerge as the equal of their forebears.

Celestia and Luna were the last to enter. For a thousand years, the portal lay forgotten, its purpose lost.

Luna thinks it is time that Twilight learn what it means to rule.


There is now a Spanish translation of this story, courtesy of Spaniard Kiwi

Chapters (1)
E
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Twilight almost missed out on the chance to have friends. So when she finds a spell in an an ancient tome that promises to tell her when she will meet her true love, she decides to get a head start on things and prepare for the fated hour.

Too bad her true love seems to be taking their sweet time showing up.


There is now a Spanish translation of this story, courtesy of Spaniard Kiwi

Chapters (1)
E

Marble decides to briefly come out of her shell and tries something different with Pinkie's hair.

Art not mine.

Chapters (1)
T
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Someone in the human world has accused Twilight Sparkle of plagiarism. She goes on CNN to clear her name.

Featuring the unspeakably sexy Anderson Cooper!

Cover art borrowed from Pixel Kitties with permission.

Chapters (1)
T
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Celestia and Scootaloo are homeless in a Ponyville alleyway together. They like to talk about things.

These are the things they talk about.

Note: The crayon scribbles of a plot is done, but the ride never ends story still updates.

Chapters (43)
E
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Clover the Clever has found a love so pure and true that no pony can stop it. But even the greatest love cannot conquer death itself.

So Clover will keep looking until she finds something that can.

(Commissioned by DataPacRat's generous donation to the Against Malaria Foundation)

"This story is amazingly clever. It reflects a true understanding of the nature of the world setting ... Highly Recommended"
Present Perfect

Chapters (1)