scootarage= knife+ evil daddy+scootaloo= dead daddy

..........well that was danglingly semi-graphic rape.
Also Twilight is still tottaly chess mastering.

With the newest chapter up and with the way it ended. most writers would end it there. I honestly cant wait to see what you do next!

MORE!!! I WANT MORE!!!! THIS IS HILARIOUS
good job actually i like this story

603435

Read on, trust me, it gets MUCH BETTER.

Today an innocent filly has been spared a horrible fate. (innocent, lol)
Yay!

Woah, this is gonna be continued? Can't wait!

when i first started reading this, i almost didnt continue cause you leave alot to be desired with your writing. that is to say, you use rather limited vocabulary, weak description at times, shotty transitions, too fast at times, and very very repetitive, to name the major ones.
however, i must say there are many other places where you excel. regardless of the writing, i am always left wanting to know what happens next. you have great plotting and scenarios, and you can relate emotion very well. i must say, as well as you can do these things now, if you improved on your writing, you could work absolute wonders.
i am truly looking forward to seeing future works.

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i was hoping somepony would catch onto that! XD

This story gave me deep feels, man. That feely sort of feel. I love it.
Take these Twilights and DFTBA

Ok. There have just been so many flaws and plotholes and unrealistic reactions and GAH EVERYTHING with this fic. Fuck knows why I read it all.

But, I can't in good conscience thumb it down. Most of it is completely ridiculous but I was constantly amazed with how you managed to make every chapter more of a mindfuck than the last...

I hope you finish this one up one day.

Also, let me add that this is the first time that I have felt dirty, absolutely dirty, as I was reading/watching something on the internet. I have seen some undeniably fucked up shit in my time, but this is the only time that I have felt completely dirty while looking at it. So take that as a compliment I guess?

Why!!
Why does it have to end?!

My face when Scoots knifes the bastard:
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/162/317/2vA1a.png

Also, I started reading this four hours ago, thinking it was a complete fic. Now it's yet another unfinished read of mine. You still get the fave, though... you monster...

On Hiatus, WHAT THE BUCK No you start writing right now get too it

759564

*hands you a chisel* Then help me chip away at this HUGE AS HELL THING!

stratospherenetworking.com/uploads/4/0/0/4/4004716/4121544.jpg?539

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I would but i have to write chapter 2 of my story and i have to rewrite the whole thing

Wow, great fic, I loved it! Only thing that urked me is despite the time difference between the two dimensions Rarity still watched Sweetie Belle "real time"... Honestly Sweetie Belle is my favorite pony (I like fillies too much...) and she doesn't get enough good clop, so thanks for that!

at first i wasnt sure about this story but you caught my attention and i figured it would be the typical student and teacher story and they get caught yadada but you won me over good job

Oh, still not finished..
Added to the list of read over and over again on loops until finished.
A beautiful job on the mind game department, perhaps even delightful work with Rarity over the mirror scenes.

1093030 I know! It's such an amazing movie and that was definitely the best part!

1093030
1110486

Sometimes when i write i will do parody scenes from other movies. it's how i pay tribute the movies i loved watching.

1118974 I do, too on occasion. In my latest, I had a bunch of Monty Python (various) references in the first 2-3 chapters. I need to try to incorporate more stuff like that into stories.

Cmon really? UPDATE THE DAM STORY :/ i litterealy wrote 120,000 words in my story WAITING for yours CMON a paragraph a day and you have one out in at least a month. Making every pony wait

1126772

Inspiration is a fickle thing, as a writer i'm sure you know this. If i'm not inspired to write something at the moment, it will cause it to suck,BADLY.

Now which would you rather?

Wait for a great chapter and get one when i am inspired to write it?
Or
Have me write one up now and it suck so badly it makes you wanna blow a hole in your monitor with the nearest sharp and pointy object?

1128921
For how LONG it has been i am opting for crappy chapter for hole in moniter

1129065

For the love of-
you can't be-
UGH!
I'll see what i can do, but no guarantees!

So any reason why this is On Hiatus? Seems finished to me...

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I have a epilogue planned. but until i get it finished this will be on hiatus

1175232 Awesome, I wasn't expecting that

best story I have read in a while.

read and listen to this

1237084

wow!

This very much fits the overall theme of this fic! Very well picked music there!

1237683 Thanks, I thought it did.

594137 or admit she's an orphan?

1279572 true you got a good point also lol

Damn hiatus

I just finished reading all the chapters and I found myself really liking the story. There were times when it looked like you needed an editor's help, but overall there's an interesting message in the story, one that, surprisingly, don't get uncut by sex. Seeing where the story went with Rarity was a pretty sharp turn in the story, something that I didn't expect but also got handled fairly well. Really, this is a good story, one I hope you finish soon. You look like you're one chapter away from wrapping this up and calling it complete. I understand writer's block is a pain, but so long as you tie up the loose ends, which is mainly Rarity and Scootaloo's relationship, as well as Scootaloo and Rainbow Dash's thing too. If you can tie that up you'll have completed the story. I really hope you do - this is a good story that needs to be finished.

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I might just give it a read! Depends on my mood though!

I have to say, your writing really improved throughout the story.

This was rather good, though I couldn't help but notice some spelling errors every once in a while. Might wanna have someone proofread your work.

And please let that "incomplete" tag actually mean something. I'm really liking this story.

1765076

lol it does, it was on hiatus up until recently.^^ I'm doing a rewrite of some fail chapters i wrote and will have them out soon^^

So just spent the last few hours reading this whole thing from start to finish.
Amazing, mind blowing, stuff.
Super baddass scootaloo with the knife.
hot, but not overly graphic, sex scenes,
and weird magic.
Fantastic stuff.

736694 It's called suspension of disbelief my friend. Read up on it.

Gave you a like and putting on my read later list. Just because the concept alone has me interested.

Now everything turned out well in the end and everypony was happy. That is until Twilight accidentally destrys equestria. Who knows what that mare could do. Snuffing out the sun when trying to use magic to kill a candle flame, get the moon to crash into Equestria when trying to levitate herself, causing a dimentional rip that will suck everything into it, get drunk with Doctor Whooves and somehow end up bringing a million of daleks running about or my personal favorite, causing a unstable time loop as Celestia and Luna dies from a monster, then trying to take care of equestria while slowly going crazy and through her dedication to save everypony she becomes an alicorn and figure out how eto emanipulate time, but just as she figures out how to travel back in time she goes grade A crazy and go back to kill Celestia starting the thing anew. The last one Is a shout out to one of my favorite fics, which sadly have died.

Well this gave me a very new outlook on life for the ponies in every fiction I have ever read.
I really kept assuming this story was going to end in utter tragedy.
It was a interesting read from beginning to end.
I will always frown upon this in real life situations......

you should have added the 'dark' tag,i wasn't [oh no he wasn't] prepared for chapter 5 on!

on a side note it DID feel pretty sexist, with the only abusive relationship inflicted by the only male you cared to mention in the series...
but overall it was really well done and i enjoyed it.

well, all in all i surprising liked this story, even if a few parts made me a little uncomfortable. good work my friend, 10 out of 10!

Wonderful story I am going to read the second set, please keep up the good work

This...made me feel a lot of conflicting emotions. I read it because I find it interesting to explore unusual aspects of sexuality, and I am something of an ephebephile myself. The later chapters are somewhat intense, and I'm not sure you made your point as well a you might have hoped. I felt we could've used a bit more about how Rarity fell in love with Scootaloo, because right now it seems she spent most of the time staring at the mirror. One thing that I had trouble with was the frequent spelling mistakes and grammar flubs, among other things. (For example, when Scoots talks to Rarity about her father, you describe her as having apathy in her voice. Apathy is a more neutral, "don't care" kind of feeling. Animosity would be more appropriate for that situation.) There's an occasional run-on sentence, and you also spell minute as "minuet" quite a lot. Fortunately, I happen to have some experience in this matter, and I could clean up some of the errors for you, if you're interested.