When he becomes of age, Spike sets out on a mission given to him by the princesses: to get married. But, as usual, he gets more than he bargained: so much more. Tons of worldbuilding abounds in this story, along with clop and other fun stuff.
Page generated in 0.028 seconds
Total duration
677 users online
736,782 hits today, 2,169,254 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
nice chapter
After reading this awesome chapter I feel like I'm going to die if I don't get some sleep.
*faints*
dude don't worry about it quality is better then quantity
Happy Independence Day to you as well!
Great update! Perfect timing too, recap on the story on a day about remembrance.
But damn, was really, really hoping with Spike and Chrysalis there that they would have agreed to drop the disguise. Oh well, maybe next time.
I've noticed the quality of your recent chapters to not have been... up to par, so to speak. Occassional errors, lack of development and lackluster reception of events could be seen and, while little and few, amounted to a displeasing sum in total when compared to previous chapters.
Personally, I credit these changes to your personal trials and tribulation, seeing as these issues are null and nye in your chapters pre-dating your announcement that updates would take longer. Luckily after the first cry of foul, the chapter following had picked up it's pace and delivered very well. Unfortunately, without readers who have set a motionless bar of expectations for the fic, you (and we) were left with the 'it's good enough' group and witnessed a noticeable (but appreciatively non-deteriorating) dent in the overall quality of your installments.
Take your time. Obviously your time is of little opportunity and this chapter, while gradually made, was churned out by cheer will. Take your time, do a paragraph or three a day and remember that a little detail goes a long way, and I sorta mean that literally as you did it well in this chapter (with motions of unease and desires of hair-twiddling)
Now for the praise. Celestia knows you inject yourself with the stuff.
Despite my aforementioned issues, this chapter turned out rather well. We see what could practically be called a confession-isque-style exchange between Spike's wives and his friends and we caught slight glimpses into the emotions and psychological break-down of somepony's trust-system.
Additionally, it was a fresh breath of air to have another update with 'home' and the subplot of Twilight's curiosity concerning Chrysalis/Meiah could lead to her exposure and confrontation earlier and out of control than Spike could have hoped for.
The exchanges between Spike and his wives are always interesting and maybe, conditions allowing, the love-herd (suggestive brow raising (on name only)) could get one final chapter to venture how bonded Spike's wives had become, perhaps going as far as to share secrets or closely-guarded information between themselves. We could even explore their pregnancies, strange desires of food, attention or mood swings. Maybe sneak in some self-reflection on Spike's account, or another feature of Spike's branched (and growing?) friendship with the prince through messages and favors/gifts.
Lastly, I have but one, subtle, suggestive remark to give. All the affection Spike is showing his foal-bearing, pregnant, prego, seeded, bred, fertilized, fruitted, ploughed, expectant, love-infused, knocked-up wives must really be making Asalah wish she was in their shoes.
How come this isn't featured?
Chrysalis is still the best character in this fic or at least the most fleshed out. She has a clear story arc, motivations and the most to risk on the journey. To be fair she does still have her changling subjects, Spike, three friends and a metric shit of love power to defend herself with should the time arise for her to need them.
That being said, I liked everyone's reaction to Spike tearing folk like tin foil.
and the Mane Six: You should refrain from referring to them as that since they're never called that in the show. Elements of Harmony, or something else would be a much better choice.
hovering in mid-air as she was wont to do. There's something missing here, or needs to be cut, or perhaps the wrong word, but it doesn't make sense as is.
Do you have a proofreader? There were a number of small, but not truly deterring errors, mostly grammatical, that a proofreader would clear up quite nicely to up the quality a bit.
Story wise, laughing my ass off. Everyone avoided the sex consciously which is amusing. The storm spell slip up in go foreshadowing, and it's nice to see everyone catching up. There is one thing I think you could have done better though. Rarity has been getting built up with romantic thoughts and feelings for Spike fairly strongly on these chapters where were focusing back on Equestria, and seeing him was your chance to really play up on that. Regrettably, you kind of missed the mark. It's not that it wasn't there, but it wasn't very prominent. On the other hand, Dash is gonna jump Spike so fast when he gets home.
2822368>>2821091 I do have to agree with you both. this chapter... could be done better. I'll likely add/subtract/rewrite some stuff in due time, but if I go back too much, I'll lose the steam I've been rebuilding ever since I was forced by life to take a break. I hope to have a better chapter up by this time next week.
And no, I do not have a beta, as I thought (likely incorrectly) that I could manage without one.
2822567 Well there's a great group for finding one
P.S. We now have a Anthro tag! Woot!
Another great chapter. This was probably a bit of a wake up call for the Mane 6 that Spike is now a force to be reckoned with. Though I wonder how they will take his changeling wife.
2822567 This chapter had so many feels.
Happy Independence Day.
2822601 I noticed: hooray for progress! I just hope everyone who has an anthro story realizes this and puts it in their tags.
2823583
Now I just wish there were separate tags for HiE and Humanized stories.
Hmm, this story is in my top 5 ever, but you know, you might get more readers if you put an epic picture with the story, that seems to just real them in.
Okay, so I have FINALLY caught up.
Everyone in Equestria is pulling their mane over Meia Morphos. What do they know about her? She is a mare from Trotten, New Jersneigh. She has vast magical powers(at least when she is angry). She is bearing Spike's foal.
One easy way to figure out if she is:
A. Actually a pony from Trotten named Meia Morphos
B. A pony replaced by Chryalis
C. A disguise created by Chrysalis
Look up census records, tax records, school records, ANYTHING that can find info on Meia Morphos. If they come up blank, assuming the records are reliable, then they confront either Spike or Meia as we watch how it unravels.
Damn, I'm caught up...
2832806 I approve of this use of forensic "I request the highest of fives" puts hand in air
2853995*high fives*
2854306and now I ride, for there are zombies to headshot and a hot dragoness to save from a lich, onward despair
darksidersdungeon.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/DS2_Despair.jpg
>anthro
And it sounded so interesting too.
2919263 Sure thing: would you recommend any free online software for drawing decent pictures or something?
2919614 Not sure, might have to ask someone who does artwork on the computer
2919821 Okay: just looked one up. If I have time and get good enough with it, I can give an overall impression of what they look like.
2919841 if you do get them done probably best to draw each mare separately and put them in the chapter their introduced.
2920168 Yeah, but if anyone who knows how to draw good would contact me, I could tell them all they'd need to know. I'm not the best drawer anymore. I used to be, but I fell out of practice and am now rather rusty.
soooo is this it? i mean is it over ? this was an amazing story and I just want to beable to prepare myself incase you tack on abandoned or on hiatus, so whats going on.??
2922765 It is not over: I just recently got a lot on plate and have to scale back on my writing blitz. Don't worry, it will still continue, just... not today is all.
2922796
thats perfectly exceptable i know all about getting ahead of myself on writing I just needed to know that you WILL be working on it.
2924158 There's going to be more than five wives.
2924437
I bet Spikes next wife is gonna be a blond pegasus
Just finished catching up and damn this is good. Gotta say though, I'm both looking forward to and dreading the return to Equestria/revelation to those at home about Chrysalis's identity.
Nice cover art.
*seven, not eight.
This site needs more Spike and Crysalis emotes.
Also, awesome chapter. Spike's off my shitlist. XD
Powerful enough to move the sun, cant maintain a phone call spell
I For some reason... wait for a...
KiLl tHEm... dO iT... DO IT... TOMATO STYLE...
if you get the joke... meh
i'll give you
a
Cookie