Flash Sentry is having a very bad Hearts And Hooves Day.

His date has been cancelled.

He has to work a double shift.

And for some reason, stallions are hitting on him at a bar...

Yeah, really bad Hearts And Hooves Day.

Edited by MythrilMoth.
Special thanks to Weeping Angel for pre-reading and JaquelinDreamz for permission to use her artwork.

This is 100% Approved by Twilight's Library

Have you ever woken up as a vegetarian cartoon pony? I have, and she won’t shut up about it. I’m stuck in her body as our minds swap control and our memories blur. I can’t seem to do anything right, and it’s even worse when she’s in charge.

Now, we’re in a back and forth war for control of her body. I just want to eat meat again, and have a little personal space. She’s convinced I’m hitting on her friends and trying to score. I’m not sure I can survive the rest of the day, let alone until we fix this.

Edits by: Selbi, Abcron, Breath of Plagues, Refro, Jaestring, The Parasprite, Starbound Gurren
Pre-read by: SkeeterTL, Solidfire, Penjacker, TypewriterError, Pearple Prose
(It took all of them to corral my insanity.)
Cover art by Tsitra360
V1.1-Rated teen sex for strong innuendo.
V1.2-Pinkie Pie now enforcing RIAA guidelines.

Boring life. Boring job. Boring friends. Would I trade it all away for a new life in a new world?

Hell no.

Do I get a choice in the matter?

Fat chance.
[/hr]
Not HiE per se; more like (Insert creature here)iE. No Mary-Sue, no self-insert; just a regular, cynical guy whose life became a bit more...Chaotic.
Not a 'Human in Equestria turned pony' story.

I thought that my 25th birthday wouldn’t be any special. Most of the day I would be busy with a report and in the evening I only had a small party planned with a friend. Well, it turned out that this day would be the start of something crazy. As far as I know human bodies don’t create tattoos out of nowhere. I liked MLP: FiM, though it had ended five years ago, but that’s not a reason to get a cutie mark, right?

A side fic in the universe of Five Score, Divided by Four written by TwistedSpectrum. A really awesome story worth your time.

Chapter 3 proofread by: Hywel and Robertsolution

In a world without bacon, five humans find themselves trapped... grazing on mother bucking dandelions. To get home, they'll need to learn that friendship is magic. Too bad none of these jerks are friends.

This story is a sequel to Miller

In the underworld of Equestria, where lowlifes lurk and crime runs rampant, one pony is whispered about with fear and hate. Not many know where he came from or why he (accidentally) left a trail of destruction through the criminal ranks. In fact, Vinyl and Octavia were his only confidants. Now the mysterious visitor is back, and he's, well... not a he anymore.

Edits by Treilacl

Curious about Five Score? Come check out the story that inspired dozens of side fics and been enjoyed by bronies for years!

Original Synopsis Even though MLP:FiM ended a few years ago, my friends and I still loved the show. Stories, merch, fan art, I loved it all. Things started to get a weird though when I found myself with a cutie mark appearing on my leg. Humans aren't supposed to get cutie marks, so where the heck did this come from? And what's going on with my hair?

More Detailed Synopsis: Five Score is an action/adventure story of the human-to-pony transformation genre. It’s unique from most transformation stories because the transformation itself is not really the point of the story. It’s the inciting incident that raises countless challenges that must be resolved. They are on earth, as a pony, and need to fix this before things get worse. Think about yourself in their hooves for a moment. How are you supposed to change back or even figure out what caused it in the first place? How are you supposed to get food or do anything on Earth without being spotted by humans? If you are spotted or captured, how would you escape? How does one even open a door with hooves!? Did anyone else on Earth get changed as well? How could you get the word out to the other ponies who are themselves hiding? Is it worth risking travel across the country to reach the others? Which of your friends would you trust to help you deal with this? And why did you turn into this particular pony? Surely it wasn’t random chance, right?

These challenges are the tip of the iceberg in this full length adventure novel There’s a lot of humor, many tense scenes, and hell maybe even a war.

But don’t just take it from me, Look what random people on the internet are saying about Five Score, Divided by Four

One of the best things to come out of this fandom.
-IrraticDrop

This made me change how I think about fictional worlds, imagination, and creativity
-relgukxilef

The only story on FimFiction to have me literally shaking with excitement.
-jeramiahsental

SWEET FILLY LUNA I AM FLIPPING MY SHIT RIGHT NOW
-Shadow Reaper

Five Score master editor:
Scrub

Five Score proofreaders:
Comrade Sparkle
Rustle my Jimmies

“You know how when you're at a party, and you use what you didn't realize was a magic letter to Princess Celestia to roll a joint?
I guess maybe that's not, uh, a thing, but yeah, I did that this one time. It was at that huge party Shannon and Adam had a while back. You know, Max's friends? …No, Celestia's not one of—They wouldn't know each other...
But anyway, yeah, in case you were wondering why I'm all like, a girl unicorn now, that was kinda the short version.”

Meet Rob, a 27 year old musician who gets more than he bargained blah blah blah
Get a front-row seat in his brain for the Long Version, as he wracks it trying to weasel out of being a pony, or at least not let anything slip by as he takes it one freaky moment at a time.

What will the other lost-weekenders think when they walk in on him passed out on their couch? Will he be able to get through the city and at least back to his apartment, if not to normal? Will he learn anything about REAL friendship along the way and stop being such an insufferable hipster? What if some blowhard fan author just couldn't “turn it off” and ended up trying to write a pony story as actual sci-fi? Will Ahuizotl get the statue? Does P=NPony? Can you grab me another beer while you're up?
And did that letter ever get to Princess Celestia?
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Your standard pony Trip Report, with your standard pseudo-autobiographical narrator, written to flush out my creative plumbing and play around with, uh, like, good...thinkies and word-putting, and because the urge to do it just wouldn't leave me alone, so I just had to get it outta my system. I just really like the juxtaposition of humans and ponies, I guess.

Title is obviously a reference to M-Theory and Tristram Shandy, respectively. Because I can never pick just one thing.

Rated T for Adult Situations, gratuitous overthinking, and fuckloads of swearing. Oh and I guess drug use.

I have just fallen victim to an accident involving dimension travel. Now I am a pony, living a life similar, yet vastly different from my old one. I'm being thrown into adventures, though they may be just ordinary days. It's crazy when you think about it. Between meeting old and new friends, figuring out what happened to send me here, and uncovering a hidden secret involving the ponies of this realm, I've got my hooves full.

I just want to go home. Someone, please help me.

Written, proofread, edited, and cover by myself.

Everyone is familiar with the "waking up as a pony" trope, but no one expected this particular trope to occur in reality. Especially the 'pony' in this picture, who life gets more complicated then before. It will be a cumulative effort to adjust to this lifestyle, but surmounting this transformation is the only beneficial option.This story varies from mundane to supernatural carnage.

(Credit to Samaru163 for the coverart)
(Proof read by HoloGraphic starting from chapter 12-17)