A continuation into season Six with the Sparkles and their friends and acquaintances.
Now that the time travel shenanigans are finally over... maybe. Twilight, Rahs, and Spike can get on with their day to day and break in their new roomies properly, while keeping Starlight and Tempest from killing each other. Or keep everyone from making bets about it.
Still this years not going to be any less annoying, with newborns, changes in dragon lord leadership, cutie mark crusades, Pinkie Pie being Pinkie Pie, Discord, of course, Fluttershy's brother, the battle for Rahs heating up between the six, Ogres and Oubliettes games gone mad, a massive prank war, the return of Daring Doo, added on top of the prophecy not having happened yet, and the Sparkles will again find themselves in the middle of everything.
As usual the lewd warning goes here cause of some situations and Cadence. I don't want to use the sex tag cause there isn't any and people might get confused by the current cover art.
[Canterlot, two days after the capture of Starlight Glimmer, Summer]
Princess Celestia shifted in her throne letting out a sigh as she finished explaining what she had been told by Velkorn. The Zebra mare had not explained much, only informing her that the real meaning of the prophecy had not yet begun.
In attendance for the explanation were, Princess Luna, Twilight, Rahs, and Spike Sparkle, Guard Captain Moskau of the Six Sixty Sixth, Guard Captain Mustang of the Royal Guard, Guard Captain Astral Path of the Night Guard, Guard Captain Comet Trail of the Ponyville Guard, Captain Spitfire of the Wonderbolts, Grand Mage Strawberry Snap, and of course an assorted gathering of nobles who claimed to be too important to miss this event. Posh Posh of the Posh family however had opted to miss this one, although Princess Celestia had restored his families title after a few days of him whining about it when she returned, he was keeping his head down and not demanding anything at the moment. He was also likely trying to recover from all the back taxes he had to pay before Celestia would restore the family title.
“So where is she now? I would like a word.” Twilight asked.
“Velkorn distracted my sister by paying back the bits she owed her and then vaulted out a window.” Princess Luna added to the conversation with a yawn. ”We saw the damage.”
Celestia glared at her sister.
“Needless to say we all need to keep our eyes out for what the prophecy really means then. “ Princess Celestia offered. “The only thing that she confirmed was that we were right about you three being in the middle of it all.”
“Of course.” Spike sighed.” And just after we think we finished it, now it's not even started.”
“That is how it works. Though to segue a little with that comment Spike. What is this I hear about Applejack's parents returning thanks to you?”
The Sparkles blinked at the Princesses tone glancing to each other for a moment before Rahs spoke up.
“Woof.” Rahs shrugged making Celestia frown at the explanation giver.
Celestia narrowed her eyes while Luna's widened.
“You jest? You pulled then from their demise to the present?!” Luna gaped. Celestia turned to look at her sister before her attention turned back to the Sparkles.
“You didn't....”Princess Celestia frowned at the lack of a response, ignoring the muttering of the Nobles. “Twilight as we explained quite often to Minuette, and the rest of you during your schooling with me, time travel is not something you should play with.”
“We were hardly playing with it, I'll have to write something up to explain everything, but it was in response to an attack.” Twilight offered.
“And bringing the Apples forward in time?”Celestia asked. “Did this have to do with the attack?”
“Uhhhhh.” Twilight offered.
“Twilight time travel is dangerous ...” Celestia began to lecture.
“Please. I understand the concepts and possibilities better than most any one save White, whom I might add did not show up to stop us from bringing the Apples here.” Twilight interrupted.
“White is hardly some one we consider to have good judgment...” Luna sighed. “The Vorpal Horde springs to mind. It took decades to fix that.”
“Yeah well even if you don't trust White, you should trust me.” Twilight began.” I mean if I did something really bad, I would have come back and stopped myself from....”
There was a flash of light in the room and suddenly there were two sets of Sparkles.
“TWILIGHT!!” The new Twilight Sparkle shouted as her Spike and Rahs looked around curiously. “You have to stop, You cannot under any circumstances....”
There was another flash of light and another set of Sparkles appeared, this Rahs wearing a green coat rather than his usual gray one.
“TWILIGHT!!” The third yelled at the second.” You have to stop, you can't tell me about …..”
There was another flash, this time it was Rahs, Twilight, and Sunset in the group.
“TWILIGHT hold up.” Sunset snapped. “This...”
Another flash of light and another group of Sparkles appeared along with a confused looking Tempest.
Another flash happened before they could speak this time showing Twilight with Sweetiebelle, Scootaloo, and Applebloom, all without a cutie mark which made Spitfire pale.
Another flash and it was the three main Sparkles though Rahs was a pony, Twilight a dragon, and Spike as himself.
Another flash and Aria, Twilight as a Sea Pony, and Rahs as a shark sort of, flopped there.
Another flash and four Trixie's one with Twilight Sparkle's hair cut and cutie mark stood there.
Another flash and Tempest, Big Mac, and Twilight appeared.
Another flash showed four Spikes.
A female Rahs and Jynx with a male Twilight.
Twilight and Sunset with a female Spike.
A male Twilight alone.
Three Twilight's one of each gender and a third female who was the only alicorn.
A Twilight with six sets of wings, countless eyes and whirling shapes who opened with 'Be not afraid', rather than stop.
The flashes of light continued, with more and more variations of the Sparkles and their friends filling the throne room, each of them seeming to be trying to stop the one that came before them.
All the Guards looked pale. Luna's jaw was closer to the floor than her nose. The gathered nobles had either run off screaming, fainted, wet themselves, or in one strange case, all three.
Princess Celestia stared wide eyed as more and more Sparkles appeared in the room, some flying , some Nox-cal, some dragons, a few looking exactly the same as the three before her.
Celestia's gaze shifted back to the original three her ears flat to her head.
Spike was looking around in awe.
“I've never had pains like this before! Oh, this is the worse one I've ever had, son! Oh, it's the worst one! This is the big one! I'm dying! You hear that, Elizabeth! I'm coming to join you, honey!” Rahs theatrically slapped his chest as if the shock was giving him a heart attack.
No one was really paying attention to him save several of the other Rahs' that appeared who were clapping.
Celestia's eyes narrowed as they fell on Twilight.
And more importantly the barely hidden smirk and twitching of her body as she tried to contain her amusement at the situation.
Celestia frowned further as another noble collapsed to the floor with a thud.
“So the student has decided to challenge the teacher.” Princess Celestia stated as Twilight met her gaze.
“I have no idea what you are talking about.” Twilight badly lied.
“ I don't believe that for an instant.”Celestia stated. “Pranking me? Of course you know... this means war.”
The Sparkles all looked at each other then back at Celestia.
[ The Tuesday after the prank war has been declared. Ponyville, Seshat]
“I am not comfortable with this.” Seshat stated her voice sounding like she was frowning.
“Why not? There's nothing going to happen to you.” Twilight stated before she vanished along with Spike, Sweetiebelle, and Trixie, the group popping back a second later.”Celestia doesn't splash targets and right now it's only me, Rahs, and Spike who she's targeting.”
“I regret that personally.” Spike sighed as Twilight, Scootaloo, Sweetiebelle, and Firefly vanished with Scootaloo's cutie mark having an illusion covering it to make her a blank flank. They all returned a moment later and Twilight grabbed a wig from the box of theater props Rahs brought into the map room. “ I recall what happened last time a prank war hit Canterlot. Half the Guards retired and some are still in therapy.”
“Wuff.” Rahs shrugged as Trixie, Saturnia, and Thorax all joined Twilight who quickly cast an illusion on herself to look like Trixie as the changelings matched as well, Trixie however was the only one wearing her hat and cape, and she refused to allow the others to wear one. There was only ONE proper Trixie after all
“Yeah, yeah, I did agree to join in.” Spike sighed as the process was repeated, only using Sunset this time.”Even with the risk this plan was too good to miss, and her expression was priceless.
“And you are sure there will be no repercussions for my help?” Saturnia asked with a hint of worry as Twilight used polymorph to turn into a nerdy looking Diamond Dog and vanished with Jynx and two other dogs.
“Nah. Rules were set up for this sort of thing and will be highly enforced.” Spike nodded as Aria, Sonata, and Rahs, vanished with Twilight, who was wearing a 'Twilight is the best Not a Princess' ball hat.” Only those who are in the initial conflict are eligible for repercussion. So it's pretty much just me Rahs and Twilight, and Celestia and Luna who are targetable.”
“Kinda surprised you're not bringing in more than this. I mean Rahs just had to ask to get the five of us involved, Applejack would be here, but she's still with her parents.” Sunset pointed out as the changelings all switched to three copies of Twilight and vanished with her.” I'd be there as well, but they need to recover from all the other shocks before I drop that they are related to Celestia on them.”
“Well Shy is out cause she doesn't do this sort of thing, and do you want more than one Pinkie Pie to exist at any point in time?”Spike explained as Twilight, Rahs, Big Mac, and Tempest all vanished, all of them dressed with costumes Rahs had from some musical about aliens and Transylvania and fish net stockings. That costume had all five of those interested in Rahs staring at him distracted for a moment.
“Valid point. Sunset said putting her tablet down after the other girls demanded a copy of the picture she took. She sighed and put on a Sombrero and black vest as she picked up a trumpet to join the next group to poof out dressed as a mariachi band. She continued as she popped back in.” Doesn't make this any less weird.”
“Weird? This is AWESOME.” Rainbow Dash called as she, two changelings Copying her, and Twilight now in the pegasus' colors vanished, and appeared a moment later.
“HEY TWILIGHT, don't forget we have a train to catch in an hour or two.” Spike yelled at his sister before she, Rarity, Sombra, and Starlight all vanished, the four of them transformed to look like breezies. Sombra was not happy about that.
Sunset took pictures of that too.
“Trixie regrets she is unable to join you, but she has a show in Canterlot tonight.” Trixie sighed as Twilight vanished with the changelings , all of them looking like Fluttershy colored trees.”Still, Trixie would very much like to know more on how a sixth has joined the war for Fuzzy's attentions.”
“I got used to bipeds and he's got a nice ass, what more reason do I need?” Aria questioned as three 'moon dogs' and Rahs vanished to reappear a moment later.
“Rahs does not have a donkey.” Jynx stated looking curiously at Aria, as four 'donkeys' vanish.
“It's a figure of speech.” Sunset sighed as four turtles all with a different colored bandanas vanish.” She means he has a nice butt.”
“OOOOH.” Jynx, Saturnia, and Trixie nodded, fully agreeing as Twilight vanished, looking like a pile of abstract shapes and eyes.
“If she had not already done this I will be very cross.” White snorted as he and three other white rabbits vanished.
“So why aren't you going with us Spike.” Sunset asked as four Discords vanished. Twilight looked confused at that one.
“To be fair I really don't have much interest seeing the foals. I'll have plenty of time to do that later and every time I show up in the Empire everything tends to shift to focus on me with the Crystal ponies. They should focus on the new royal foals this time.” Spike explained as four versions of Celestia vanished.
“How selfless of you.” Sunset smirked as Spike, Starlight, Rahs, and Twilight all vanished, all of them reverse gendered. ” So it's just me, Rahs, Saturnia, and Twilight?”
“I am going as well.” Jynx stated as four cat versions of Twilight vanished..”I need to check on the dogs I brought up there.”
“And Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy are going along with Bees and Thorax. I am also certain that Starlight and myself are being brought along.” Tempest added as she, Grubber, Sunset, and Twilight vanished all dressed as pirates, popping back a second later. “I believe Rainbow Dash and Prince are going as well.”
“Sonata and I are headed up there as well.” Aria sighed as four griffons vanished.”Mom wants us to see if there's a suitable spot for an embassy, and told us to check out the crater lake that's forming up that way. She's trying to let us do our own thing at least.”
“ I am highly displeased with this company.” Saturnia muttered as four versions of Luna, human, anthro, normal, and Woona popped away.
[?]
“So this is it? Hurry up and wait?”Adagio grumbled.
“Sometimes this is what happens.” Solomon offered looking at some odd swirl of magic in the air in front of the tube he stood before.” The old goat told me to stay put, so for the moment I am, and since I am, so are you.”
The room was full of such tubes, all filled with some odd, neon orange liquid that bubbled and gurgled like lava lamps. Each of them was filled with a body as well. The bodies all seemed the same, male unicorns, though the growth, and coloration of them was all different, some were rapidly growing out of their foal stage, while others were barely embryonic, a few were full adults with various cutie marks emblazoned on their flanks, likely the work of the large tattoo gun sitting on another table in the room.
“What's with all the corpses?”the teams resident walking corpse asked.
Solomon sighed and glanced back at Squall, the yeti demi god was sitting off to the side of the room on the floor with his arms wrapped around his massive sword the cold metal pressed to his furred cheek. His eyes glowed red, though that was the effect of the spell keeping him alive rather than anything else. The hole in his chest had been repaired, though his heart was still destroyed from the black crystal spike that speared through him.
Why the old goat had given him a scroll to create what amounted to a revanant Solomon had no idea. Squall was pale, which was surprisingly noticeable on the yeti, though he still moved and acted as if he was still alive. He did however have to obey those in control of him. Solomon had made the spell included Adagio, himself, and Diamond, just to ensure that yeti didn't try to back stab some one not covered by the spell. In the end though, Solomon shouldn't have bothered with the added layers of an already complex spell. The yeti had an honor code of some sort and he was highly focused on killing Sombra for cheating in a duel more than anything else.
He also seemed a little annoyed that Adagio oft had him waiting on her hoof and tail. Solomon didn't care as it kept both of them out of his mane most of the time, unlike now. Still he couldn't help to enjoy explaining his work.
“They are not corpses insofar as they were never alive in any real sense of the word. You are not the only dead creature here Squall. “Solomon sighed walking over to another tube this one filled with reddish liquid. “My initial plan failed and I was only able to return as a specter of sorts. Not unlike that annoying Diamond Dog god in truth. Still I should be able to make something at some point that won't completely degrade when I posses it.”
“Is that why you wanted my father's blood?” Squall asked glancing at Adagio who was clearly listening though not asking any questions herself.
Solomon took note of that, wondering if the two were conspiring against him. Highly likely, but he doubted either would try anything, at least not yet. Adagio didn't have the capacity to end him, and Squall couldn't even try. But the pair clearly were digging for information. Adagio was a clever fish, and it showed by how she let Squall ask the questions, despite his knowing they came from her.
“Something like that if I wanted a yeti body to clone any way. I'd prefer a pony god and there seems to be quite a few of them around lately. Cloning from a demi god gives me a body that lasts much much longer, though not long enough.” Solomon answered. It was not as if he had not told Diamond of all this already anyway.
“So why's the filly in a tank?” Squall asked finally, gesturing a hand to the red filled tank, where a pink filly floated, her eyes closed..
Solomon wondered when he was going to get to that part.
“Because she wanted power, and we are finally at a point where I can give her the first taste of that. She was seen after all, and even if she wasn't identified, keeping her out of the public view for a while is always good.” Solomon nodded looking at the magic readout floating in front of Diamond's Tank..
“ And having her pass all her families wealth and connections to you was just icing on the cake?” Adagio questioned.
Ahh. There was the meat of it.
“Not entirely. I'm mostly a place holder, once this is finished I will be passing the leadership of the Rich empire back to her and letting the fake name and pony I created to 'buy' the Rich empire so Diamond Tiara could 'retire' fade out of existence. I have no desire for wealth and fame like that, my skills are not in number crunching and micro managing. That sort of power is just a pale imitation of what I seek.” Solomon paused considering. “She will be in here for some time unfortunately. However that does not mean we do not have things to do still. I have a few tasks for you two to complete for me.”
Adagio and Squall looked to each other then back to Solomon who had yet to look at either of them as he checked his experiments.
“Well, it beats sitting here counting the bubbles.” Adagio shrugged,.
[Later that Tuesday, on the edge of the Crystal Empire territories. On board the Princess Bride]
Saturnia leaned over the railing a little more, the tail of the Abyssinia form she had started to use more often when Rahs was around flicking in the air. Of course she didn't stick to one such form, changing coloration and the like as often as Rahs changed his coat color. Currently the fur she had was a nice calico spread with pink rather than orange coloration. She also had a light blue top on that barely covered the fair sized chest she had developed and an even tighter pair of pants that covered her and legs seeming more painted on. All of it was shifted as well and she made sure Rahs knew that she was actually naked., the moon dog was trying to read a book on deck and was failing as his eyes drifted to her every time she wiggled her rear.
Not to say she was winning all his attention due to the damn blood mage, fish, and bitch.
The deck was unfortunately, crowded.
Sunset was changed to a human form, and was wearing a bit less than Saturnia was, something she called a bikini. Given it was the height of summer even in the frozen north it was warmer, and the ships protective spells made it stay that way. Sunset set up a lounge chair, claimed she was trying to get a tan, oiled herself up with sun screen and put herself on the same deck as Rahs all glistening in oil and such. Saturnia made a note to see if she could mimic that form as well as Rahs' gaze kept shifting between the two of them.
Jynx was a problem. She was doing much the same as Saturnia was, only dressed in her usual shorts and far too tight vest. No matter of shape changing could counter the natural appeal of a build like hers. Thankfully she was not doing well on the airship. Unfortunately this made Rahs more concerned with her and had him checking on her more than the others. Saturnia would have been more annoyed if she thought Jynx was faking it, but clearly the large Diamond Dog did not like air travel.
Then there was Aria. The damn fish wasn't even trying to vamp Rahs. She was sitting nearby with her nose in a book, occasional bringing something up about the theater that was in the book to Rahs. Evidently what ever theater tech they wound up discussing held his attention more than she and Sunset's display, or Jynx's sky sickness.
Saturnia sighed, she was better than this. She was sulking that she couldn't simply wrap him around her hoof like any other male. Of course he certainly wasn't like any other male and every time he did something he showed that more and more. She had wanted him when he was just a mortal and an exotic creature of interest. Now that he had become a god that hadn't changed in the slightest save now she had to fight five others for his attention. Well four if Sunset held her end of the bargain. She didn't like the idea of sharing him in truth, but she was the daughter of the Goddess of Change, so some alterations to her mind set were always required.
Though that brought up another thing that had been worrying her. Her mothers relationship with Rahs' brother. There was a foal now, a half sister to her, though to be fair, the foal with her sire Cadence was also a half sister. Honestly she felt like she needed a map and four lawyers to trace out her family line sometimes. Sure it looked simple on the surface, but then the legalities of gods and weddings and new empires came into it and Saturnia didn't bother to keep up with it. Though this was the first time any one was going to be allowed to meet the barely a week old foals.
She just hoped Rahs didn't fall into a weird 'he was her uncle' mindset.
She was the Princess of the Changeling race, well eldest Princess now, which meant very little really as the council mother put in charge did all of the day to day, particularly now that Changelings were more an open race. Most of them were still in hiding, why try to fix what wasn't broke, but the Crystal Empire hive was the largest collection of non hidden changelings in the world, with her own Ponyville hive a close second.
It was not how she imagined running her own hive, but it would do.
Now all she needed was her prince...
Jynx hated flying. Sadly that was the only thing she could think of at the moment, the ideas of pulling Rahs into a room some where on the ship were dashed only a little while after take off. While she was grateful for the sympathy Rahs was showing, she hated to have him see her like this. Any other dog would have seen this as a sign of weakness and tried to press it, Rahs had just checked to see if she was alright.
Jynx closed her eyes with a wince. She needed to make sure she didn't show any sign that she was ill on the ground where any of the Crystal Empire Dogs could see her when they landed. Despite her new status the current generation of dogs still only respected strength with only a few that had more than two brain cells to rub together
At least something good had come out of this. After the Storm King was defeated Applejack was a bit more agreeable to a truce with her. The pair of them might have to share him, but between their respective positions of leadership and the farming, that was something that would be easy to do, and to still keep him worn out.
Jynx had only wanted pups from the moon dog at first, now she was feeling possessive after their last date.
She might have to share a little, but she sure as Tartarus was going to make sure she got the first pups from him.
Sunset was weighing her options. She had considered going with the old Titanic thing here on the prow of the ship, but Rahs didn't know the movie, so that was right out. She went with option two, showing off a white and blue striped bikini she had Rarity make, one she made sure was a bit too small. He certainly noticed, but rather than do anything about it he was focused more on Jynx being sick and trying not to favor any of them more than another.
While some what endearing that he cared, it was also annoying as fuck.
Still it was expected. Rahs was generally concerned about everyone's welfare, at least those he considered friends or didn't piss him off. He wasn't an idiot either which was a good sign, Sunset couldn't stand idiots, though that definition wavered every so often as she got to know people.
She had thought all of the others were like their counterparts in the human world, only to find out that Fluttershy here while as meek as the one she knew, had a spine of steel and knew where ALL the bodies were buried. Because she and Pinkie had put them there. And if there was any question you wanted to know about any animal, she knew it.
Rainbow Dash was still the same arrogant jock, but she was also more up to date on high society and the current trade relations of Equestria than any one expected.
Pinkie Pie was a cosmic horror that Sunset wanted no part of.
Applejack was surprisingly business savvy and up to date on high end culture. Most of her skill was on farming, which had farm more technical know how that Sunset had thought. The fact she was also rather devious in her pursuit of Rahs at times was also a surprise for one who was supposed to be the Element of Honesty.
Rarity was exactly the same as her human counterpart, right down to the whining. The only difference was this one was infected with a literal nightmare and she had no issue using it for her own ends. That she had some how gotten her cousins interest like that was odd from what she knew of the gruff asshole. Both of them still denied it of course despite Sunset having recounted at least eight dates she knew of last time her uncl... aunt Luna , had asked.
Then there was Twilight. Enough said.
Rahs put up with, and helped all of these crazy ponies, even fighting against them occasionally, but generally he was a nice guy, someone Sunset should have been able to have eating out of her hand like it was nothing, but for some reason here she couldn't.
Granted she had some tough competition.
Applejack was a weird one in the contest for Rahs. She had grown to want him despite it only starting as a bestial infatuation..... supposedly. But she was pretty much Rahs species and it was clear he had interest in her.
Jynx was another contender, particularly now that the large bitch was a god as well. That had not been something she had been expecting. Rahs was still wary of Diamond Dogs according to Twilight, but he was fine if it was only Jynx around, he tended to avoid any groups of them around town, which was weird and no one would explain what the deal was.
Saturnia was a sneaky one, but their plan might be the best way to get him.
Trixie was a pain in the ass, and despite being the only one who didn't have a biped form, and being the only proper mortal, she was closer to Rahs than any one else, knowing things no one else knew. That connection with him was a strength in some areas and a weakness in others. And she limited that weakness by not being a meek type going after some one she liked. From what Sunset had learned while Uncl.... AUNT Luna was training her she actually was somewhat soft spoken and hesitant. Then she slipped on the mask started talking in third pony and became the greatest force of obnoxiousness the world had ever seen.
Then there was the damn fish. Sunset wanted to punch the smug girl in the face. She came out of no where and some how managed to not only get Rahs out on a date , but actually managed to worm her way into the group despite there being little to no commonality.
Sunset huffed, making sure her boobs jiggled enticingly right when she knew Rahs was looking at her. She needed to talk with Saturnia again, and they needed to start planning.
This was absolutely hilarious Aria smirked to herself as she thumbed the page in the book she was looking over.
Despite not having her gem any more she could feel the other girls impotent rage and strife, probably because most of it was directed at her.
Aria hardly cared, she was having fun, she didn't have to worry about money or food , or getting found out by carnivorous other world sirens or dealing with Adagio screaming about something or Sonata doing.... Sonata things.
Well not as much the last one now that mom and Dad were distracting her.
She was actually able to do what she wanted. And oddly she owed it all to the blue beast she was currently dating and fighting five others for.
In truth she didn't care if she won or lost, she just planned to enjoy herself and if Rahs enjoyed the time too, even better. He was adorable normally, three times that much if the pearl was used, and he actually knew what she was talking about if she went on a rant about stage tech. So yeah if in the end he chose one of the other girls she was hardly going to be distraught over it for too long, if he did chose her she certainly wouldn't mind either. For right now though she was having fun for once just for the sake of it, and that she could piss off the others after him made it even better.
Rahs shifted a little, his ears perking at the shouting and cheering coming from the back of the ship.
After the defeat of the Storm King, Prince had snagged a couple of the yeti ships when they went to auction, had them gutted and had all of the engines mounted to the Princess Bride during a full refit.
As it stood the ship probably didn't need the air bag as it could probably launch itself in the air just by the power of it's rotors alone.
Prince and Rainbow Dash were currently taking advantage of the speed, by flinging themselves off the back of the ship with only a rope to hold them and a light plank to stand on to surf the air currents and clouds kicked up by the craft.
That they wanted to do this was the only reason Rahs hadn't opened a gate to the Oneiroi and had them cut the time to the Crystal Empire in half. That might have helped Jynx out.
At least they were not taking the train, Rahs was okay flying, but he still hated taking a train.
Now of course he was using all his skills to remain perfectly neutral.
Not that it was easy with the girls flaunting themselves at him like this.
Saturnia and Sunset were doing their best to draw his eye so overtly he couldn't help but notice. Jynx would likely have been trying the same if she wasn't airsick. At least Aria was just talking shop and hadn't shifted from her pony form. He still wasn't sure what was up with the siren, but he had to agree she had been fun on that date.
Still he couldn't show any favorites, especially now. While Trixie, Aria, and Applejack might be simply fine if he didn't choose them, he was less expecting a calm rejection from the other three. And he wasn't even sure about those first three, the girls were getting aggressive. Thankfully fear of Luna and Cadence as well as knowing he would be upset kept them from going for each others throats, he was still hoping one or more might find some one else to chase, as he wasn't sure he could bring himself to reject and hurt any of them at this point, but he knew the longer this went on the worse it was going to be in the end.
He really should try and work this into a play of some kind.
Tempest Shadow let out a sigh looking over the side of the ship watching the snow capped ground far below them. She was rather fond of airships and travel like this, and with Twilight, Rarity, Pinkie,and Fluttershy some where planning out a party for the foals they were going to see, Tempest was mostly left to her own devices.
Only mostly because she needed to keep an eye on the newest Sparkle acquisition, Starlight Glimmer.
The mare had been mostly catatonic for a while now flinching visibly when ever one of the Sparkles opted to talk with her.
Tempest really wanted to know what she had seen and how it compared to her own Sparkle trauma.
Maybe she should start a support group.
At the very least Rahs wasn't glaring at her any more, and Spike had pretty much accepted both her and Grubber. Seshat seemed cool with her as well, but she didn't like Starlight, and kept moving corridors on the mare getting her hopelessly lost until some one else came along to guide her to where she was going.
Currently the pale lavender mare was sitting on a bench behind Tempest still with a thousand yard stare. Tempest understood bringing her along , and no one wanted to leave her alone at the moment, but still.
“Limbs should not bend that way.” Starlight muttered.
Tempest glanced back, sometimes she spoke words that made Tempest only that much more curious.” If you break something in enough places it can bend any way you want.”
“No, she didn't break ANYTHING!” Starlight shivered.
Tempest considered a moment letting her mind dance over the options for that and nodded.
Yup siding with the Sparkles was the best thing she'd done since her horn was broke.
“Yep, fascinating stuff really. Whenever a baby is born in the Crystal Empire, the parents bring it before the Crystal Heart. They get the purest shard of crystal they can find, then pick a Crystaller to present the baby to every pony who comes. Then they all share the light and joy they feel, feeding it into the crystal that joins with the Heart, and increases its power!” Moon Dancer offered.” And this is going to be a double royal Crystalling, so pretty much the whole empire and most of the Changelings will show up. There are actually no records aside from those passed down word of mouth about a royal Crystaling because it hasn't happened since before Solomon ruled, Sombra never even got one and technically he was part of the royal line before he abdicated officially to Empress Cadence.”
“Hmm so there's another way to increase the hearts power? I thought the quarterly fairs were doing that?” Twilight questioned.
“Those are to strengthen and upkeep, but the Crystaling actually connects the pony born to the heart which is how the crystal ponies become so vibrant. The fascinating thing is it seems to also work on Changelings and Diamond Dogs. We've had two Changelings allow their pupa or grub or whatever go through a Crystaling and the little thing is the most blindingly neon baby I have ever seen. The Diamond Dog pup turned out much the same as the crystal ponies.” Moon Dancer continued. “This is causing rampant speculation now as to whether or not the crystal Ponies are a proper race or an off shoot of Ponies.”
“Given their physiology I would expect they are a divergent, much like the Nox-cal.” Twilight offered.
“That's my theory too, though Sunburst has pointed out that Cadence has Crystal Pony as a main portfolio but doesn't have ponies as a lesser like Luna does with the Nox-Cal.” Moon Dancer offered. “ We were going to research that a little more, but between my foal and the new Sparkles, our research has kinda stalled. On the plus side the two of us are official Crystaliers, as trained by the one remained Crystalier, Rhede Pelt.”
“Wait Pelt is a trained Crystalier?” Twilight asked.
“Surprisingly yes, though with the legends of him being related to nearly half of Equestria, it's not that surprising. Stargazer didn't have a Crystiling as we were still in the process of working everything out with the Empire when he was born to add more chaos to it.”
“Where is little Stargazer any way?” Twilight asked.
“My mom showed up to help out for a bit, thankfully Sunburst's mom hasn't moved up here yet or those two would be in a grade A bitch off again.” Moon Dancer sighed. “ Speaking of bitches.....”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Moon Dancer calm down. Starlight's here with me on a probationary status of sorts.”
“She tries anything with my husband and I'm gonna break her in half.” Moon Dancer huffed.
“Ehh I wouldn't worry, she's still in the first stage of a new condition the doctors have called Sparkle Shock. “Twilight sighed.
“So they finally named a disorder after you, only took ten years.” Moon Dancer smirked.
“It's not that bad!” Twilight grumbled.
“Twilight. LYRA owes me bits for this.” Moon Dancer grinned wider.
Anyway...” Twilight pressed on as Moon Dancer cackled. “Tempest is keeping an eye on her while we're here. Now then let's go have a look at my new niece and nephew.”
Upon arrival at the Crystal Empire, Twilight met Moon Dancer at the dock and the pair promptly nerded out.
Rahs did his best to ignore them. There were more interesting things to focus on.
Like Jynx's complete turn around the moment she set paw on the ground. She immediately acted as if she hadn't been sick at all which was odd because he was quite certain she had been. Of course she was meeting the pack of Diamond Dogs that had come here to help with the mines and was being presented a pup that looked like he was partially made of crystal, like the ponies of the Empire. The attention of the pack quickly focused on the crystal club that her tail had become and there was a bunch of fuss being brought up about that too. He had forgotten she hadn't really been here since she ascended.
He might be looking at the start of a new species here. If Luna was right all it would need was around 20 members of the race and it could have a god, and going by Jynx's tail... her actual tail not what he was trying hard not to stare at, she might already be on the way to claim that portfolio.
Aria, Sonata, as well as Starlight, Tempest, Prince and some of the other ambassadors that showed up with the ship were prepping to head out to the lake to survey the site for a Neighlantian embassy.
Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy were chatting with Bees and Thorax about something, and Sunset and Saturnia were off to the side muttering to each other in hushed tones, occasionally looking his way.
That last bit worried him, but thoughts of what the pair might be plotting were tossed aside as a tired looking Shining Armor finally showed up, ushering the group into the palace with only a small glance to wonder why there were so many non family coming to see the foals before he seemed to sigh and give up.
The rebuilt, rebuilt, and rebuilt again, Crystal Palace was a flurry of activity. Servants and Guards ran around like mad. The servants setting up decorations and preparing for the upcoming Crystaling, and the Guards running rampant to make sure that nothing was going to interrupt said Crystaling.
Rhede Pelt and Starburst were in the middle of the chaos barking orders and pouring over a pile of books stacked on a large table in the middle of the grand ballroom.
Bees was immediately escorted back out of the palace the moment a Changeling Guard spotted him.
Pinkie Pie had two Guards assigned to her immediately, though no one knew what good either of them would do to stop the pink mare if she decided to do something.
The Guards stopped Fluttershy, Thorax, and Rainbow Dash as well as the group neared a heavily armored door.
“Sorry. For the moment we're just letting family see them. Cadence is a bit jumpy, though to be fair so am I.“ Shining Armor offered. “You'll get to see the foals at the Crystaling.”
“Awwww...” Pinkie Pie deflated.
“Pinkie Pie you are welcome to help set up the Crystaling Party. Just go talk to Starburst and Rhede, see what they need. “ Moon Dancer smirked.
Pinkie Pie nodded and darted off with Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Thorax following.
Shining Armor glanced at Sunset who shrugged.
“Don't look at me. Cadence is technically my cousin or sister or whatever the heck dad... mom made her when she was adopted.” Sunset offered.
“This makes the deal we have even weirder.” Saturnia muttered.
“Oh shut up, we're not blood related, if you were that weirded out by it you wouldn't be after Rahs since he's a uncle by Marriage.” Sunset lectured.
“Don't get me started on that nonsense.” Saturnia sighed.” Can we go see my new siblings now or not?”
The small group was led into a fair sized windowless room in the middle of the palace, the walls were lined with toys and other foal essentials, the walls and trim were painted in pastel pinks and blues with bright green curtains hanging over the doors.
Rarity would have a fit at the clashing colors.
In the middle of the room were two bassinets one of a garish blue, the other of a glaring pink.
On either side of the bassinets stood Cadence and Chrysalis. The latter looking much the same as always, if a little smug, while the former looked much like Shining Armor, IE, a complete wreck.
Saturnia looked at her mother with one eyebrow raised.
“What? I've done this before, not my fault these two don't listen to me.” Chrysalis smirked.
“For the last time we are not gooping them to a wall until they can talk.” Cadence grumbled.
Saturnia narrowed her eyes at her mother.
The others, already familiar with the 'ignore the bug' plan in dealing with the Changeling Queen, eased closer to have a look at the two new foals.
In the bright pink bassinet was a swaddled pastel pink little foal with a small stubby unicorn horn poking out of a mass of pastel purple and blue striped hair.
In the other bassinet swaddled in a blue blanket was a obvious little changeling, though a swath of blue hair striped with green curled around the stubby pony like horn he had.
“So... this is my daughter, Princess Flurry Heart, And my son Prince Shintasha. “ Shining Armor offered proudly.
There was a general collection of awing from the group as they all looked at the foals.
“They are adorable.” Twilight offered softly.
“I know right?” Chrysalis smirked floating a camera up in her magic for some reason.
“Oh I can’t wait to throw them their first party..” Pinkie Pie said.
“It might be a little while before they are ready for something like that.” Saturnia stated.
“It's okay I can wait. That just means it's gonna be bigger and better.”Pinkie Pie agreed.
Everyone paused, then looked at Pinkie Pie who was still over the pair of them oohing lightly.
“Pinkie Pie…. “Sunset frowned. “This was supposed to be for family….”
“I know, but then I got to thinking on it and I’m related to the Apple family, who are related to you, who is related to Celestia, who is related to Cadence and thus, I am family.” Pinkie Pie explained. “ So it’s all good and I get to look at the babies.”
Rahs rolled his eyes as Twilight face hooved, Sunset, Moon Dancer, and Saturnia chose to ignore her, while the royal trio looked a bit confused.
The foals on the other hoof started to stir, Flurry heart opening bright blue eyes to blink in surprise at the collection of creatures looking down at her. She cooed curiously as Shin yawned showing off his fangs before his green eyes opened blinking at seeing things other than his mother, mother, or father.
Rahs tilted his head a little watching as the foals locked eyes on his movement. He smirked slightly shifting his ears and the points of light, the foals following the movement as he went through a few slow random words in guard cant the glowing lights of his ears fascinating the pair as they flicked into the different positions.
Cadence glanced over at Sunset and Saturnia, both of whom were staring at Rahs with some what dopey smiles as he played with the foals.
Flurry giggled and lifted her fore legs out of the swaddling, the cloth falling away as a large pair of pink feathered wings spread out wide from her back as she reached for the lights.
“Wat.” Most of the group gaped.
Chrysalis took a picture.
A moment later Shin laughed along with his sister, his own wings flaring out, black feathered ones with white tips.
There was another round of shock and a statement of ‘WAT’ a little louder before Chrysalis snapped another picture.
“Pegi corns?” Twilight asked.
“Nope.” Cadence chuckled, her wings folding over to tickle the chins of both foals, both of whom giggled like mad, batting at the wings with their own, a pair of glowing folders appearing at the tips of their feathers.
There was much more staring with wide mouths as Chrysalis took another picture.
“This is going to be a very interesting Crystaling I think.” Moon Dancer smirked.
[Crystal Mines]
Jynx raised an eyebrow looking at one of her former attempted suitors. The white dog had vanished for a while with a small pack of others several years ago and only in the last few months shown up again. Oddly, unlike before, Peabody and his small group were not trying to take over the Crystal Den or even woo Jynx into submission.
Still when Rufus had told Jynx they had shown up, Jynx had expected some play or another from the dog.
She did not however expect for his little pack of ten to all have vanished in order to get married. She expected even less that the dog who had tried to force himself on her the hardest would have wed a griffoness.
Three others aside from Peabody had griffons with them. One had a harpy, two had mares, two others had opted to marry Nox cal, and the final one had found a literal fox with a kitsune.
The group was quite surprised to find that Jynx had become the god of the Diamond Dogs and then they surprised Jynx further by claiming 'the plan' worked and then ran off to throw a party.
Jynx and Rufus both had no idea what the heck had happened, but the group wanted to settle down in the Crystal Empire Pack and neither of them could think of a reason not to allow it.
“Gonna be some odd pups.” Rufus shrugged.
Jynx glanced at the dog she left in charge of the growing Crystal Pack as he spoke one eyebrow raised, given his own son was made of crystal.
“They’re gods? Of what?” Twilight finally managed to gasp out.
“Flurry has majors in Construction and War, with Minors in Ice and Coffee.” Cadence stated.
“Luna is going to lose her stars damned mind.” Twilight winced.
“Shin’s majors are Destruction, and Peace.” Chrysalis’ grin grew wider. “With minors in Frost and Cake.”
“Ah fuck…..” Saturnia grumbled.
“Cake flank is gonna hate it, and I love it.” Chrysalis grinned.
“Well I guess that means that Teacup did lose the portfolios when he went home. “ Sunset drew a breath between her teeth. “Now I’m gonna have nightmares about who got the portfolio of unimaginable violence.”
Rahs blinked looking at the others reactions and shrugged. They’d deal. The trick with his ears didn’t seem to be keeping the foals attention as much any more so he switched to another trick, holding up a blanket before his face, drawing the foals attention with the wiggling of it before he dropped it, no longer standing behind it.
The foals gasped and looked around around in surprise before Rahs stepped out from behind Cadence causing the pair to start giggling all over again.
“Great, my oaf of a brother is clearly volunteering to foal sit.” Shining smirked.
Rahs raised an eyebrow, lifting the blanket again, he then side stepped into the Oneiroi from behind the blanket to pop out from behind Shining this time.
The foals giggled and coo’d though everyone tensed as the pair’s horns started to glow brightly and with a flash there were a pair of navy blue moon dog pups sitting in the bassinets with them looking confused.
The foals giggled and clamped their forelegs and wings around the new arrivals burbling happily.
“What the shit!?”
The whole group looked at Rahs then back to the infants.
Rahs sniffed, then his eyes widened before he scooped up the pups and vanished into the Oneiroi by ducking behind Chrysalis.
The two foals pouted that the puppies were gone before their horns flared again and the pups were back with them looking even more confused.
Rahs appeared again immediately snatched up the pups and vanished.
A moment later the pups were back with the foals.
When Rahs appeared this time it was with a rather large and annoyed looking Moon Dog bitch who clearly was in a state between panic and annoyance as her gaze swept the group present, stopping on Cadence before looking at the pups and the foals.
“Bork.”Bri snapped at Rahs who flinched.
“Wait… is that Titania and Oberon?” Twilight asked.
“Wuff.” Rahs nodded.
“And Bri watches over Cadence’s dreams……” Twilight muttered, her horn flaring brightly as she stared at the giggling foals. Oberon was struggling madly to get out of Flurry’s grip, while Titania just sat there as Shin chewed on her ear, having given up.
“Well?” Sunset asked noting the scan Twilight had preformed.
“Yup….. there’s a link.” Twilight sighed. “Maybe you shouldn't have jumped into the Oneiroi in front of two new god tier foals?”
Rahs sighed as Bri slapped him in the back of the head.
“WHY IS EVERYTHING ON FIRE?!” Cadence screamed out.
“Whoa deja vu.” Pinkie Pie offered.
The foals having fully woken up, along with two Moon Dog pups that now took after their uncle Rahs and had a direct connection to the power gods, were every where at once.
The foals were flying around giggling and screeching like mad, both of them super excited at all the attention they were getting.
The two pups however were acting like they were on a sugar rush from hell and were tearing about the room playing keep away from the adults.
An attempt was made by Twilight to corral them with magic, only for the two new bonded magic eaters to tear through it and some how manage to get even more hyper.
Pinkie, Sunset, Saturnia, Rahs, Bri, Cadence, and Shining were running all over the place trying to catch the foals and the pups.
Twilight was nursing a headache.
Chrysalis and Moon Dancer were both off to the side watching with rather smug looks on their faces.
“Amateurs.” Moon Dancer sighed.
“I know right?” Chrysalis chuckled.
The foals having gotten a surge of energy from the pups chewing through Twilight's spells started casting spells every where themselves.
Rahs tried to eat some of the spells cast by the foals and gave up quickly. Shin's magic tasted like Chocolate cake, and Flurry's like Chocolate hazelnut espresso.
The toy box and items around the room were all scattered everywhere, showing exactly how many ponies had issue with the royal family judging by how many of them made annoying noises. The curtains and several piles of ugly baby clothes were set on fire. Walls and spires of building blocks were constructed, and the giggling of foals and puppies would haunt the nightmares of several of those in the room for years.
It was at this point the door opened and Rhede and Sunburst strode in.
“What the heck is going on in here?” Rhede questioned having heard the explosions.
“Ah... the foals woke up.” Sunburst nodded sagely, watching the moon dog pups run around. “And evidently they have the zoomies.”
Shin, who evidently was curious about the new comers came over to say hello only to get a whiff of the cologne that Rhede wore.
The little changelings nose wrinkled up as he sniffled and inhaled.
Rhede blinked stupidly at the foal, not seeming to realize that death had come for him in the form of a half changeling pony foal, that also was an alicorn somehow. Luckily Sunburst tackled him as Shin sneezed, a horn beam launching from it, shooting out the open door causing an explosion and lots of screaming from the main room.
The noise drew the attention of Flurry, Titania, and Oberon, all three of them rushing out the door before any one could react followed by a sniffling shin.
The massed adults cried out and rushed out after the foals and pups.
“Good catch dear.” Moon Dancer smirked helping Sunburst up off the floor.
“Thank you. I remember my sons sneezes... and well.” Sunburst shuddered gesturing towards the pony he tackled.
“I have seen the abyss and it was giggling.” Rhede muttered from the floor.
“Oh get up. There's only room for one drama queen around here and Rahs and I are already fighting over it.” Chrysalis stated stepping over Rhede and trotting out the door after the others.
[Crystal Mines.]
The announcement was met with rather a few cheers and a bit of grumbling, though no one was going to try and argue with her. The Crystal Pack was now an official pack separate from the Jade Wolves, under the leadership of Rufus given he had done well to keep them inline after Jynx put him in charge.
They were still her Dogs and she made sure they knew she would come down on them like a landslide if they fucked up, but given they all seemed to be alright with the arrangement with the Empire, she was willing to see if they could lead themselves.
Not even Peabody and his group complained.
Another topic that was brought up was the purchase of fine Crystals by the Emperor and Empress for the Crystaling. There was a number of decent Crystals gathered up, cut and polished for the parents to choose from.
Jynx however found flaws in several of them and refused to have them presented to the royal family.
Rufus wasn't too thrilled at being called out on his packs work, though he realized the Alpha of Alphas was still trying to impress the Moon Dog she was after. Another set of crystals were found after a mad scramble by all the dogs in the mines, and eventually a number of rough crystals were produced that met Jynx's satisfaction. Rufus was going to have the shapers start work on cutting and polishing the new choices when he, like every other Dog, watched Jynx pick up a crystal and the stone sort of flowed in her paw as she focused on it, the form shifting and shaping to a perfectly faceted crystal before being handed off to a polisher who stared at the flawless stone in absolute awe as Jynx set to work on the next.
In short order the new set of crystals to chose from were finished and were being prepped to be presented.
Jynx smirked. “Let us see any of the others do something like this.”
[Further north at the edge of the Crystal Sea.]
“So Luna dropped her moon here?” one of the Ambassadors asides asked.
“Smashed it several times actually. That cracked a glacier further north and started to flood the crater. There's a fresh water run off from the north and a bleed in from the ocean to the south east.” Prince explained. “ Some how it missed the main river a few miles further on, though that can be diverted if we need to.”
“More water in it than I expected. We can probably open the gap to the ocean a bit more and get this filled up faster.” Aria offered looking at it. “Otherwise it might take a few hundred more years to fill up fully, and if we let it go naturally, or divert the river it will be too brackish to work well for sea ponies or River ponies.”
“River Ponies?” Tempest asked.
“Yeah, there's a few groups that decided to move from the sea and further up the rivers and lakes, they seem to prefer fresh water, but are pretty much the same as sea ponies. It's more of a regional thing than a separate species or anything.” Aria explained. “Sonata, you ready?”
“Yup yup, “ The blue siren offered, a shower cap on over her hair and a pink flamingo inflatable ring around her waist.
“Alright, I’ll check the northern edge by the river, Sonata check the middle and you guys take the seawall.”Aria ordered to the other two sea pony workers with them. “ I can deal with the fresh water easy and Sonatas a faster swimmer than you guys.”
“I guess the rest of us stay here?” Tempest questioned.
“If you want. Not really sure why you guys followed us out here in the first place.” Aria questioned.
“You’re still under watch for your crimes.” Tempest stated.
Aria raised an eyebrow. “So are you and drooly there.”
Tempest glanced at Starlight, then back to Aria and shrugged. “I don’t get it either, but I have my orders.”
“There was blood and guts and icor and zombie parts falling from the sky like a snowstorm of gore.” Starlight muttered.
“Okay that totally sounds like a metal song.” Sonata commented, her voice dropping a few octaves as she growled out. “Snowstorm of Goooooooooooooooooooooooooore!!”
[Crystal Palace]
Another explosion rocked the main room followed by the loud giggling of a foal and the yipping of a puppy.
There was shouting and crying out as the adults tried to corral the four little ones with absolutely no success.
Chrysalis, Sunburst, and Moon Dancer sat off to the side watching the goings on with mild interest.
“I thought you were going to help them, seeing as this is your second kid.” Moon Dancer asked Chrysalis as Flurry soared over the refreshment table, pulling up at the last second and letting her father crash into the punch bowl.
“They refused, said they could handle it and wanted a fresh take because, and I quote ‘ There’s never been any record of an alicorn being born like this let alone two of them so what you know can’t be completely right.” Chrysalis stated as Rainbow Dash was dragged through the air as she tried to hold onto Shin.
“Did Shining say that or did Cadence?” Sunburst asked leaning back a little as a energy beam shot past.
“Cadence, though it is a bit of a paraphrase in truth. Shining just wanted to ask his mom for help. Twilight Velvet pretty much skipped town not long after they were born, claiming she and Nightlight were going on another Honeymoon for a few months.” Chrysalis explained.
“Clever mare.” Moon Dancer nodded as Oberon started climbing the wall.
There was a crash as a chandler fell from the ceiling after Titania decided to swing on it.
“What the heck is going on here?”
The three parents turned to look at the new comer. The draconequus watching the chaos with a small smirk of pride.
“New parents.” Sunburst offered.
“Ahh I see. Reminds me of when the girls were little.” Discord smiled before snapping his fingers and dropping into the Laz-E-boy that appeared. He quickly handed out a couple buckets of popcorn as Flurry Heart sneezed at some dust that was kicked up from Titania crawling along the top of the curtain rods.
The explosive blast thankfully was dodged by every one, though it impacted the pedestal the Crystal Heart was sitting on blasting the whole thing over and sending the heart soaring to crash down on the stone floor, shattering it.
There was a collective scream from everyone present.
There was a moment of silence after the screaming where everyone in the room drew a breath. Some of them froze, not sure what to do, this was mostly Guards, and Fluttershy. Some of them continued to scream, running around in a panic as they did so, this was mostly the maids and other servants, as well as Pinkie Pie.
All the Sparkles, including those who married into the family, the Royal advisors, not counting Rhede who was still on the floor after his brush with oblivion, the scattering of nobles who hadn’t joined the screaming and the two demigods were also frozen in place as their minds raced on what to do.
Bri and Chrysalis gathered up the foals and pups before they could do anything else, though even the little ones had realized something bad had happened, and their play time was over for now.
This moment didn't last long before Moon Dancer and Starburst started shouting orders.
“CADENCE, SHINING, WE NEED A SHIELD OVER THE EMPIRE NOW!” Both bellowed at the same time as they rushed away from where Discord sat.
The chaotic creature decided that perhaps he should be somewhere else before any one blamed him for anything when it was all the actors fault, and popped out of existence with a sound like a flugal horn and an accordion had a baby.
Cadence blinked in surprise at the screamed order, but Shining Armor was used to that sort of thing and reacted immediately by raising a shield over the Crystal Empire.
The white stallion grunted in surprise as his horn flared brighter and the sound lick the cracking of an iceberg in the frozen tundra echoed around the city.
Cadence quickly put up a shield to support her husband and winced as well. ”What the heck is that?” she gasped.
“Several thousand years of built up ice and snow appearing all at once directly over the Crystal Empire. “ Moon Dancer explained as she trotted back in from the balcony, her husband still standing out side and swearing as he stared skyward.
“What? Why is that there?” Twilight demanded as she popped over to look out side at the shadowed city.
“Right Twilight did you read the book we published about the Crystal Empire last year?” Moon Dancer questioned.
“Of course I did.” Twilight scoffed.
“Right as the forward said most of that information was collected from various notes and documents as well as citizens testimony, but some of it was from books we found in hidden chambers set up by Solomon, histories he evidently didn’t want to destroy but didn’t want the public reading.” Moon Dancer started to explain. “One of the books held an account of the creation of the Crystal Heart by a earth pony mage named Karl the Terrible.”
“Karl was the daughter of a unicorn family of low birth, but she wanted to be able to cast spells like her parents. So she studied everything she could and applied to the Crystal Empire’s mage's guild, and she was approved.” Sunburst continued picking up from his wife’s words.
“Thing is they only brought her in as a joke, and they even intentionally trained her wrong so they could laugh at her and push their own egos about unicorn superiority.” Moon Dancer picked up. “Karl eventually found out about this and was pissed about it, when she confronted the head mages she was practically laughed out of the building. Karl swore revenge.”
“Granted her revenge was to create the Crystal Heart, thus beating out every unicorn mage in the empire in creating something that would protect an area the Emperor chose for the Capitol of the Empire , Constantan-opal. The heart would be recharged by the ambient magic of the citizens at a city at a festival to be held every year that would keep the frozen north at bay. It also worked to boost the citizens very well being if they were tired to it by a ritual called the Crystaling. Several other protection and maintenance spells were layered over the crystal heart, a gemstone Karl some how got from the heart of a volcano, a materiel called Magma Diamond. This stuff is supposed to be so rare and hard to come by that dragons have been known to offer entire hoards for a shard of it. It evidently forms so deep that even the dragons that can swim in lava can’t get down to it.”Sunburst finished
“This doesn't explain why there is a glacier the size of Luna's moon over the empire.” Chrysalis called growling as she stood on the balcony looking up at the massive block of ice Shin and Flurry tucked under her gossamer wings.
“It does actually.” Sunburst sighed. “She wasn't called Karl the terrible just because she used the Emperor’s favor to wipe out the college and have every mage of the guilds horn removed. She was called Karl the terrible because she SUCKED at magic. Rather than displace or melt the snow and ice that were prevented from falling on the Crystal Empire, she set it to collect in a pocket dimension figuring she would be dead and gone by the time it became an issue. A later mage named Trevor ‘the pretty good, thanks for asking’, came across Karl's spell work and fixed it, though he couldn't do anything about the pocket dimension, he simply doubled down on Karl's work and the Crystal Heart was reinforced since the draw to hold the dimension is barely four thraums.”
“Four thraums!? How the buck did an earth pony create a pocket dimension that only used four thraums?” Twilight demanded.
“I know right!?” Moon Dancer chimed in.” The space folding alone should take seventeen, and that’s with the modern understanding of duel matrixes and mana layering.”
“Stop nerding out and how do we fix it?!” Saturnia demanded. “How did Solomon manage to keep the heart active during his time? Especially since he fucked with the heart’s spells?”
“No clue, Rahs ate all the spell lattice when he bit into the heart so no one knows how he set things up.”Moon Dancer snapped.
“Well excuse me for freeing the Empire, from a self feeding trap that was gonna eat everyone.”
“Focus. Shining, how long can you and Cadence hold the shield?” Sunset questioned.
“I dunno.. couple weeks. Maybe a month if i push it, give or take.” Shining Armor shrugged, as everyone stared at him.” I mean it's pretty heavy, but I dealt with worse than this before I had the companion spell cast on me.”
“We can probably hold it longer if we alternate and someone watches the foals.” Cadence added. "My shield isn’t as good as his, but the weight of this isn’t as bad as trying to keep a trap from snapping shut.”
Everyone continued to stare at the pair as Chrysalis cackled in pride for the pair. The ones still running around in a panic, save Pinkie Pie, slowed at this , looked at each other , and started to clean up, pretending they had not just been screaming their fool heads off a moment prior.
“Alright, I did not expect that.” Sunset sighed.
“Well it would get easier if we start chipping away at it or melting the ice and snow.” Saturnia considered.
“Awesome I can do that.” Sunset grinned heading out onto the balcony.
“Great. So all we need to do is find a super rare crystal to carve back into shape and re-lay a unknown amount of spells and bindings laid on it by a dead earth pony wizard who screwed up to get the result that happened all while a massive moon of ice is ready to crush us.” Twilight summarized.
“Yup.” Chrysalis agreed. “So have you got it worked out yet?”
Twilight glared at her before she sighed.
“Almost. Really getting the crystal is going to be the hard part, I've already figured out how to reduce the cost of the Heart’s output to three thraums by simply shunting the material rather than holding it in a pocket dimension.”
“Can I still eat it?” Chrysalis asked.
“Well given the energy received and emitted by it should still be the same, I would say yes.” Twilight considered. “Though the flavor may be different.”
“No problem there, I like everything bagel as much as the next changeling, but i'm not against a change.” Chrysalis shrugged.
Twilight trotted over to the shattered heart, her horn glowing as she scanned it. “Okay, it’s a bit more than a fancy rock. This might be more of a problem There’s traces of emotional magic on these shards. A LOT of imprints.”
Twilight looked at the crystal ponies who were cleaning up, all of them had their coats dulled like they were when she had first seen them, though they didn’t seem to be suffering like they had when they first came back.
“Hmmm. Alright. First we need a new crystal, then we need to enchant it with the same things Karl did.”Twilight muttered.
“Shouldn’t be a problem, Sunburst and I have studied the heart, the layered spells and the book and notes from Karl.” Moon Dancer offered. “We should be able to duplicate and improve it. We just need the crystal.”
“HAHAHA! Fight fire with fire!!! Ending is near!! Fight fire with fire!! Bursting with fear!” Sunset sang from the balcony, waves of heat filled the air around her as the molding of the arch started to melt.
“ Okay aside from Sunset, are there any active volcanoes around here?” Twilight asked.
“I know my mind is made up So put away your make up Told you once I won't tell you again It's a bad way”
Jynx raised an eyebrow looking over at the blue furred Siren bounding along next to her. She had no idea what the mare was singing, though it was fairly catchy and there was a light musical accompaniment with it that seemed to emanate from the air around her.
The broken horned guardian of Twilight was trotting along behind them, with the gibbering lavender mare who, well Jynx wasn’t really sure what the deal with that mare was, but Twilight was keeping an eye on her, and she wasn’t interested in Rahs, so Jynx didn’t really care.
On the other side of Jynx was the Siren she was most concerned about however, the purple pig tailed mare was another challenger to her claim on Rahs.
Had things not gone the way they had, she simply would have destroyed the mare and been done with it. However even beyond the agreement she made with Luna and Cadence, this one had very powerful parents whom Jynx had no intention of turning against her.
The stronger she became the simpler things should have been, instead everything had just upped in complexity in the most dramatic way possible.
Jynx blinked.
She would need to talk to Rahs about that.
The Sirens had come back to the palace seeing the massive chunk of ice floating above it. Jynx had returned as well, though she was carrying a number of flat cases she had made out of stone to hold the perfect crystals she had made for Rahs’ nephew and niece's Crystaling, what ever that was.
The blue Siren had asked her if she worked for Domino's when the group of them met.
Jynx had no idea what that was either.
Still the purple mare was worth note as a challenge, she didn’t rise to the bug’s needling, and seemed quite content to not need to flaunt herself to keep Rahs’ attention. That was almost worrying, Trixie was the same way and some how that normal pony was still in the running to claim Rahs.
Unlike Trixie however, this one was a predator, quite a dangerous one as well, the others didn’t seem to notice, but with how she moved and spoke, the Siren was taking the measure of the others, she had played by the rules thus far, but it was questionable if she would continue to do so.
Granted Jynx felt that way about the bug as well, but the Siren had no fear of any of the gods that had made the rules.
Well except for Twilight, but that was just common sense really.
Jynx shook her head as the three of them approached the main chamber of the palace, it was something she would need to discuss with Applejack when able.
Her ears perked at some sort of commotion from the other side of the door. The purple one noticed it too, though the blue one kept singing.
Pushing open the door Jynx’s eyes widened.
The curtains and a few throw rugs of the room were on fire, and several of the servants were trying to put out the fire with wet table cloths, bottles of water, and the occasional spell.
Sunset was standing on the balcony, on fire herself , the crystal around her was melting with the amount of heat she was putting out as she blasted the sky with fire cackling like a mad mare.
Saturnia looked to be in the form of a dragon in order to deal with the heat and was yelling at Sunset, though the mare was ignoring her.
Twilight Sparkle was also yelling, though she was yelling at Rahs and trying to strangle him screaming something about his drama powers being evil.
Cadence, and Shining armor both had their horns glowing and were sitting at a table being served tea and cake by Pinkie Pie.
Fluttershy was standing next to a tall red earth pony who was laying on the floor muttering about being killed.
A massive black and green octopus sat in the middle of the room was slowly turning in place, a pair of foals and a pair of moon dog puppies hung gripped in one arm or another cheering and giggling as she spun them around.
A moon dog whom Jynx recognized as Bri, Rahs’ real sister, was staring up with a hint of annoyance and worry , her eyes following her pups as the octopus spun them around.
“What the hell is happening here?” Aria demanded.
“Somebody rolled a one.”
The small group looked at Starlight.
“What?” Jynx demanded.
“The Sparkles have reproduced, there will be no end to the horror.” Starlight shuddered gesturing to the two foals.
“Well yes, that is my plan with Rahs Sparkle as well.”Jynx admitted getting a bit of a glare from Aria
Starlight blinked. ”Truly this is the darkest timeline.” And promptly fainted.
The Sirens and Jynx looked down at her as Tempest shrugged.
“Meh, she’ll snap out of it in a few days, a week or two at max.”
“Is there any reason that we are not going to see the foal's Crystaling Tia?” Luna huffed looking at her sister as the white alicorn filled another notebook with prank ideas. A glance to the wastebasket next to the small desk showed piles and piles of crumpled papers and a few pencils and quills that had caught fire with the rapid pace her sister was writing things.
“Several actually. First and foremost is this is going to be a party that is going to have a large number of Changelings, and none of them view me favorable, so I'm letting them enjoy themselves without worrying about me. Two, I'm letting Chrysalis be lured into a false sense of security given it's bug hunting season again now that the foal is born.” Celestia offered.” Three I am keeping an eye on Ponyville, and the Apples in particular to make sure they will adjust alright to the future, and finally we are still backlogged from the invasion and have a ton of work to do.”
“And that is why you are hiding in your room coming up with pranks?” Luna frowned.
“Exactly, besides aren't you always reluctant to go to the Empire for any reason?” Celestia glanced back at her sister.
“We see your point, we shall leave you too this.” Luna muttered and vanished with a pop.
Celestia sighed. Luna really needed to get over her aversion to the Empire, as far as she could tell aside from Rhede, none of the Empire citizens even knew Luna had been Nightmare Moon. Sombra staying away was one thing, but for Luna it was just her own guilt.
When Solomon was killed, Nightmare Moon was freed, but her goal had shifted from whatever it was Solmon wanted, to destroying Celestia.
Luna believed she was back in control then and still wanted to kill her sister. That a number of other gods believed the same thing. Celestia couldn't say for sure if that had been Luna or not, but she knew the Elements of Harmony had banished her for a thousand years. Celestia was not sure if that was because she screwed up and the Element's should not be used by one pony, or if the thousand years was needed to let the spell break so she could be cured. The only one who would know for sure would be Harmony, and the damn tree was more reclusive and hard to find than Velkorn when she owed money.
[ Crystal Empire.]
“Okay so this thing has fallen off the side of the palace, had evil magics cast all over it and probably been chewed on by a witch wolf and falling off a pedestal breaks it?” Aria questioned.
“Pretty much.” Shining Armor shrugged sipping his drink calmly as Cadence nodded next to him, the pair of them seeming quite calm despite the chaos around them.
“It's the main reason why Twilight is trying to strangle Rahs. She figures it's because the heart breaking is the most dramatic thing that could have happened, it did.” Cadence offered.
“Well it wouldn't be so bad in truth, though the Crystaling binds everyone too the heart and makes it so the heart is properly empowered. “ Moon Dancer offered.” So we're going to have the entire Crystal Empire population have another Crystaling in order to put the new heart back up to the old ones power level.”
“That's providing we can find a replacement. “ Sun Burst added.” That is a very rare gem, and finding one in that size is going to be....”
“Fixed it.” Jynx offered handing the repaired Crystal Heart to Cadence.
“What!?” the entire room yelled out, save the foals and pups who were still giggling in the octopus' arms.
“What?” Jynx asked holding the crystal up, the restored gemstone shifting between a heart shape, a diamond shape, and a mini sculpture of Rahs before forming back into a heart. “One of my portfolios is gemstones.”
“Huh.” Moon Dancer offered scanning the Crystal Heart with her magic. “Everything's there. It's just like it was before it broke.”
“Though we still have the massive ice chunk above the city.” Sunburst pointed out.
“Can't you just angle your shields and roll it into the crater like a big game of golf?” Sonata asked.” I mean there's nothing in there but a stone table at the bottom and I'm pretty sure no one cares about that."
Shining Armor and Cadence looked at each other.
“Yeah, probably.” Shining Armor shrugged.
“Great!” Pinkie Pie cheered. “Now that the problems are all sorted out, LET'S PARTY!”
Sombra sighed reaching a hoof up to push an errant strand of his black mane back behind his ear. Not that it mattered, the otherworldly flowing his mane did would have it back in his face before long. While it wasn't as bad as Luna's or his aunt's, having a mane and tail that moved on their own as if blowing in a gentle wind could get annoying.
Rarity seemed to enjoy it, though she only had the effect if she tapped into the Tantabus that had bonded with her.
That in it's own right showed the mare was strange, to join with a literal nightmare and not be consumed by it.
Granted Sombra had noticed she had gotten a great deal more vindictive when it came to certain things. Not that he minded, he found it amusing unless it was directed his way. Which was likely how he had gotten dragged along to Manehatten again to look for a location for a third store. She was toying with focusing on stallion's clothes for this one, but most likely she was going to end up with a mixed shop like she had before. The idea was to see if Coco wanted to run it and add her own designs to what was sold, though that was between Coco and Rarity. Sombra didn't think the meek mare could deny a force of personality like Rarity, but unlike her previous boss, anything Coco made would be her own product line that Rarity would let her sell in shop for only a small cut of the profit.
The punishment was less the trip out here, as that might be enjoyable, particularly the food. The problem was he was going to spend the whole trip waiting for Pinkie Pie to bean him with something and scream about Fluttershy.
Currently Rarity and Pinkie were whispering about something and he was left alone with Pinkie's sister, Maud.
The two of them had been staring each other down without a word between them for close to ten minutes now.
Sombra was rather enjoying the silence.
“Well seems we have a plan, shall we get lunch before we go looking?” Rarity questioned walking back up.
“Hmmph.” Sombra offered.
“Okay.” Maud agreed.
“Wow, they're really bonding.” Pinkie Pie gasped at the two.
[???]
“Fucking gave me his shopping list... what the hell.” Adagio grumbled as she fiddled with her mane, her form shifted to human because, lets face it, fingers were much better than hooves for dealing with a mane of the volume on Adagio's head.
“This seems a little more esoteric than milk, bread, and eggs.” Squall muttered looking over the list, his attention shifting from the paper to the odd former mare seated on the other side of the room in front of her mirror. He wasn't sure if his gaze was drawn that way due to the oddity of her form, or the nudity of it.
“That's a much bigger word than I thought you were capable of.” Adagio grumbled.
Yup, it was the oddity.
“I was never stupid Fishie, but emotions hold a great deal of sway when your blood is flowing. Being dead muted most of those, save anger.” Squall sighed. “Not to mention seeing that my own code of honor was enough to get me killed has left me with things to think about. Given I no longer sleep I do a lot of thinking.”
“Don't call me that.” Adagio snapped. ”Well at the very least I don't have to worry about you doing anything stupid particularly since we've got a lot of things to get for Solomon.”
“No idea how you plan to hide that mass of hair of yours, all I need to do it put on a shirt to hide the hole in my chest, no one has ever been that good at being able to tell one yeti from another save other yetis. “Squall snarked back. “Plus I'm less noticeable now that my fathers empire was crushed and those under his control have scattered.”
“Still, no one trusts any yeti.”
“No one did before either, what of it?”
“You might need more than a shirt, given your smell.” Adagio growled.
“I smell like dirt dug from six feet underground, and dried blood. That's barely going to be noticeable compared to that stars awful flora explosion you call perfume.
“It's not like I've been able to go out and get my preferred brand.” Adagio scoffed. “ Any way first item on the list is sending us to Turtle Toga. I assume you can still pilot an airship?”
“I'm dead Fishie, not dead.” Squall grumbled.
[Manehatten]
Maud and Sombra regarded the stallion who had traded Pinkie Pie for her party cannon. A rather stupid deal to be honest, but no one ever accused the pink menace of intelligence.
Maud was not amused at the stallion, though Sombra had a very wide grin.
He recognized the stallion.
Judging by the way the stallion was shuddering and trying to back through the brick wall behind him, he recognized Sombra as well.
Rarity was helping.
“Last I checked a bag of that caliber was only worth about sixty bits.” The mouth on Rarity's left leg hissed.
”Not the same price as a several thousand bit party cannon.” A fanged maw on her shoulder growled.
It amused Sombra that the stallion was still looking at him as he panicked.
“It was a fair trade and she agreed to it.” The stallion stammered.
“I believe when we finally released you and your acquaintances, Rahs and I suggested that you find a more lawful profession other than attempting to con money out of theaters and show ponies.” Sombra stated flatly. “I do not see scalping as a step up.”
“It's not illegal!”
Maud frowned, every so slightly, Sombra barely noticed it, but his grin widened.
“Neither is a customer complaining about a bad trade.” A fanged maw spoke from Rarity's mane, the three eyes over that maw shifting to stare at the stallion, none of them the same color or pupil shape.
“I would like to point something out to you that you seem to be missing here.” Sombra offered. “You've met me and know what I can do, my toothy associate here is a literal nightmare, and yet the one you should be worried about is our calm looking friend here. After all it was her sister you swindled, and since we agree with her and are the only witnesses in your little trading ally....”
“Right fine........” the stallion stammered. ”Sixty bits.”
“Forty.” Maud stated flatly.
“True, we did spend a great deal of our time and effort lodging this complaint.”Sombra hummed.
“I doubt he even has a proper license.” Rarity offered, one of her ears curling up over the stallion like a tendril to speak, the entire length of it split in a grin showing an impossibly deep mouth.
“Fine Forty, just take the cannon and go!” The stallion whimpered his eyes darting between the three of them now.
Maud picked up the party cannon in a hoof and turned carrying it off. Sombra gave the stallion the bits and followed. Rarity smirked with fifteen different fang filled maws, sixty plus eyes covering her all focusing on the stallion as she chuckled before walking after the other pair. “Pleasure doing business with you.”
[Ponyville]
Twilight Sparkle frowned flipping through a book before setting it to the side on a pile. A moment later she grabbed another one and did the same, the pile of books next to her growing rather quickly.
Tempest watched from the other side of the room and spared a glance to Starlight who had seen Twilight and was now cowering behind a hastily built bunker.
Tempest was actually impressed at the siege prep the lavender mare was capable of where she had gotten all the sandbags at such a short notice was something she was curious about, but not enough to ask at the moment. Words might draw Twilight's attention and given the way the mares eye was twitching as she flipped through her books made Tempest want to NOT have her attention.
“I'm going to murder her.” Twilight growled.
“Seshat would you mind getting Rahs and Spike down here before Twilight explodes?” Tempest asked wondering if there was room for her in Starlight's little bunker.
“I already have. Rahs is preparing for a date with Jynx and Spike is painting his miniatures, they should be down in a moment.” Seshat offered as the piles of books grew taller.
“Oh, great what now?” Spike muttered as he trundled into the room, the purple dragon clearly annoyed that he had to stop working on his models because his sister was losing it again.
“SPIKE, look at this!” Twilight demanded whipping a book over to him holding it open in her magic. Spike reached for it only for it to be yanked away. “Look with your eyes not your dirty dirty paint covered claws!”
Spike rolled his eyes and looked over the book blinking. ”Okay, what am I looking at? Did some one misprint the third line or something?”
“Celestia has done her prank and it is evil. The retribution will be swift and destructive. She shall pay for this insult.” Twilight growled.
“Umm, what did she do?” Spike asked.
Twilight glared at him, then sighed.” Right I forgot that you favor the base form of words that are present in comic books and you are truly a plebeian.”
Spike offered a griffonese gesture that required the use of fingers to get right in response to his sister.
Rahs came down the stairs to this raising an eyebrow at the wordless conversation Spike was offering.
“Woof?” Rahs asked.
“LOOK AT THIS!” Twilight screamed shoving several open books at Rahs.
The moon dog rolled his eyes and looked at the pages. He blinked and looked at another book then picked a book up off the stack and flipped through it.
“Bark?”
“Yes, ALL of them!” Twilight answered.
Rahs' eyes widened and he dove behind a stack of books vanishing. A few moments later there was a howl of rage from above before he stepped back out from behind the books holding a large number of original playwright scripts in his claws, his growl was rattling Tempest's teeth.
Starlight found herself shoved to the side as the mulberry colored mare dove into the small bunker as well.
“Seriously what the heck are you two on about?” Spike demanded.
“Celestia changed the font in all the books in the library to Comic Sans.” Twilight snarled.
[ Ponyville, Seshat, Mid Summer, one week after the Comic Sans issue was fixed with much yelling and screaming.]
“Sunset are you ready?” Twilight called.
“Yep. Wasn't too hard to figure out what was wrong.” Sunset offered, her horn glowing.” The table was pulled slightly out of sync when you guys rode it out of here.”
“Thank everything, the itch was driving me crazy.” Seshat offered.
“Well thankfully Starlight remembered enough about the spell she used for us to realign it.” Twilight nodded.
“Given she's been faking being traumatized for the last couple of days or so to avoid anyone's attention, I am glad she is helpful rather than plotting.” Tempest offered, sparing a small glare at the sheepish looking mare on the other side of the table.
“Don't give me that, I still have nightmares.” Starlight offered.
“Well Rahs says that's because you don't have a Moon Dog.” Twilight offered. ”He's looking to see if he can fix that, though it's rather hard to find one without a previous connection.”
“Can we do this please. I cannot move and yet I must scratch!” Seshat grumbled.
“Yeah sorry.” Twilight replied, her horn flaring as Sunset prodded something under the table. After a few moments the 3-D map shut off then turned on again flaring brightly for a moment before settling back into place while Seshat offered a relieved sigh.
“Classic tech bullshit, turn it off then back on again.” Sunset chuckled.
“Much better.” Seshat muttered. ”Oh...”
There was a moment of silence as a pair of cutie marks appeared over the map and swirled together before stopping over Canterlot, showing they were Rarity's and Pinkie Pie's marks.
“Huh....” Twilight muttered. “And they just got back too.”
[ Canterlot, the Next Day ]
Rahs tilted his head slightly, returning the glare of the noble who had been walking on the street and taken offense when the group of 'lesser' ponies and creatures would not move out of her way forcing her to go around.
The two Thestril Ponyville Guard that accompanied Rarity, Pinkie, and Rahs also returned the mare's glare as she walked around them. Pinkie didn't seem to notice and Rarity ignored the mare, though the two were in a rather heated discussion as they all stood on the corner.
It still surprised Rahs that there was some pony who didn't recognize everyone in the group, or at least the Guard's armor markings given how many papers, and stained glass windows that had images of the Element Bearers, himself, and images of the Ponyville Guard after some of the stuff they had done.
Shards, one would think everyone would show any Guard more respect after the Tirek thing, though many nobles were pushing to remove funding from them after the 'failure' against the storm king and changelings, despite the fact both had been beaten back, BY the Guards.
“I still think we should check with the Princesses.” Rarity offered.” They might know something.”
“It's a big city and they can't know all the friendship problems in it.” Pinkie Pie pointed out.
“Arff.” Rahs added making the two mares look at him and consider. Neither of the Guards had any idea what he said.
“True, our marks were hanging over the city not the palace.” Rarity hummed.
“Right so what we need to do is set out and see what we can find.” Pinkie Pie offered. “ A friendship problem's not gonna drop in our laps unless we sit like Lyra does... of which I'm kinda hungry, lets start with the restaurant row.”
Rahs shrugged.
“Well it's not like I have a better idea.” Rarity shrugged before turning to the Guards. “ Miss Night Sky I know you stated you needed to check in with the local branch, if you want to do that we'll head to the restaurant row, I'm curious to try out one of these 'Star' restaurants that are being flouted as the best there is.”
“Of course Miss Rarity.” the thestril Guard nodded before glancing to her partner.” Dew Leaf stay with them, I'll be back after I make my report. Shouldn't take too long.”
“Not a problem Sarge.”the thestril stallion Dew Leaf nodded.
“Don't worry dear we'll order you a plate.” Rarity offered.
“Yay food!” Pinkie Pie cheered.
[Sweet Apple Acres]
Sunset glanced up from the table as Applebloom stormed into the room, slammed the door behind her and flopped down on the old couch pushed back against the wall.
“Spike?” Sunset asked.
“Course it was, she's on a kick about him, an nothin any pony says ken change her mind.” Applebloom huffed.
Sunset nodded and went back to looking over her notes. The crystal tower had become something of a safe haven for Applebloom as of late. After the events of the Crystaling which had been one hell of a party, even by Pinkie Pie standards, the tower no longer carried the energy from the Crystal Empire, the Heart's destruction not relinking to the errant piece of castle that wound up at the farm.
Big Mac and Applejack were rushing to prep now that the area of effect warming was gone. The plan was to put up a large number of green houses to cover the crops that had been set up to take advantage of the year round growing season the tower produced. It wouldn't matter until late fall, but Applejack was of the mind that it was better to prepare early than late, as once the harvest hit, even with help, there wouldn't be enough time for building, particularly since Zapapples were predicted sometime this year as well. Due to her curse Applejack had found that she could predict when the season was going to start due to an overwhelming urge to howl.
Sunset had claimed the towering monolith as her own, bribing Jynx to hollowing out an apartment in the solid crystal of the upper parts of the tower. There was even a fireplace/ terrarium for Ray.
Sunset would owe the Diamond Dog god some enchanting on some mining tools later, but it was a fair trade and neither of them was willing to try and bring Rahs into the deal.
Once the plumbing had been set up, Sunset had moved out of the house. She was not very comfortable with how many were in the main house now. It was fairly crowded with the siblings, Granny, and herself, adding in the two parents made it a bit worse. With the spire losing it's power, Sunset had decided to take advantage of it.
Another effect to having a large tower structure that tickled her unicorn nesting instinct, was that she saw frequent visitors of the Apple siblings. Mostly Applebloom and AJ, though Mac had been up here once or twice as well.
All trying to get away from Pear Butter and Bright Mac who were both leery of both the strange tower, and the mare now living in it. Family or not.
Bright Mac was about as verbose as his son most of the time, but he was if possible as well read as Twilight, though she still had the advantage due to her portfolios and living in a library. His main issue seemed to be trying to adjust to how the farm was being run now, as well as all the magical upgrades to things that Sunset had adjusted, and constantly had to reset due to Applejack eating them. Nothing that would bother the crops, but reinforcements that cut down on mending time and allowed Big Mac to go all out with some of his duties
Pear Butter seemed to be alright with most things, she was leery of Sunset due to her being a unicorn, or maybe the pyro tendencies... one of those.
The biggest issue with Pear Butter though, was that she absolutely hated the fact that her children were dating, a dragon, a 'trumped up Diamond Dog', and a Princess.
She was certain Twilight was just stringing Mac along, and claimed that a Princess was way too high maintenance for him, She was also horrified at his draconic attributes, that Twilight seemed to like.
Bright Mac had asked if Twilight made him do that to himself, and when Big Mac said no, he shrugged and never brought it up again.
Applejack constantly got an earful, though Pear Butter nearly lost her damn mind the first time she saw Witch-Jack. Applejack had been spending a lot more time in her witch wolf form because having fingers and claws as well as the scent tracking and magic eating helped with quite a few different tasks around the farm, mostly keeping pests away.
Pear Butter wanted to rush her to a doctor to figure out how to remove the curse, getting rather upset when she found the only cure was to kill Applejack in a fire that would leave nothing left, and that would only kill her daughter not the curse.
That didn't stop the complaining though, particularly when she found out Applejack and Sunset were both interested in Rahs, along with four others.
Sunset had shut her down near instantly when Pear tried to say anything to her, pointing out that Pear was many years her junior as she was Granny's sister and Princess Celestia's daughter. The look on Pear Butter's face was currently the background image on Sunset's tablet.
Applebloom got it the worst though. Pear Butter was adamant that not only was she too young to be dating any one, but that she should find a nice colt, and not a fire breathing dragon.
While Big Mac and Applejack were willing to put up with, or deal with their mother's ranting, Applebloom was only a few months old when they 'died' and barely even knew them. As such she was quite pissed at this veritable stranger she didn't even remember telling her to do anything, let alone telling her to stop dating the dragon that saved her life and that she got her cutie mark working to save in turn.
“Designs are done, I can set up this place as a relay point, though I want to use Seshat as the main transmitter for Ponyville. Her connection to the mana lines make her perfect. “Sunset explained. “I've got everything set up, I just need to get the work started. Aria's plans for the relay line are still the best as far as I can see. Mare has waaaaay too many engineering degrees.”
Sunset looked up from her notebooks and tablets, the mass of them spread across the table she had hauled up three flights of stairs to get to her new living room. Her plans to set up a 'wireless' network of towers for the crystal tablets, and other products currently in the design phase. There was already radio in Equestria and episodic 'TV' if you could afford to have a crystal player. Sunset's plan was to skip VHS and DVD and go straight to the internet. She had actually progressed further than she thought she would by including Aria. Seems the Siren had quite a few engineering degrees from the human world. While Sunset doubted she could build a suit of powered armor from scraps she found in a cave, Aria was rather knowledgeable about cell towers and what was needed to build one to last. Despite Sunset's plan being mostly magic and crystal based, the set up and tower construction would be the same either way. With the plan explained, Aria was quite interested in getting involved with it, as it would be a source of income away from her mother.
Once again Sunset had to wonder how gods who became parents were so BAD at it. If not for Chrysalis she would be a little worried about her new cousins. Though that was a weird feeling too.
Speaking of weird cousins, through marriage and odd uses of body altering spells, Saturnia was in on the idea as well, if for no other reason that she could provide the man power... bug power, needed to build all this.
Still the issues on the farm were going to come to a head, possibly a explosive one before long.
Sunset had asked her sister why she hadn't reigned in Pear Butter yet and Granny had simply told her that she was leaving that to Big Mac and Applejack.
But she also mentioned that Pear Butter probably still recalled the whole dating and wedding fiasco with her son and Granny would happily tear the mare a new one if she did more than gripe. Granny approved of the Sparkles, and didn't care what any one else said.
Sunset followed suit and washed her hooves of it, simply focusing on her project, some farm work, and the plans for her next date with Rahs.
The waiter for his part only shifted his gaze to the pink mare that accompanied the Diamond Dog, raising one eyebrow.
“I agree, we didn’t order any appetizers.” Pinkie Pie stated.
“That is the meal.” The waiter sighed this was hardly the first time that had been brought up.
“Where?”
“There.” he gestured.
“Under the plate?” Pinkie blinked, lifting up the plate.
“No miss, on the plate.” The waiter sighed, that joke was getting old too.
“I thought that was a stain from a bad dishwasher.” The Guard with them pointed out, the waiter’s face impassive as he had heard that far too often as well.
Rarity frowned as well, though she was unsure if it was due to the portions or the way the others were acting. For the moment she remained quiet, she had been to a few posh places that served food like this, and it made little sense to her then either.
“This isn’t even a mouthful, with what you are asking price wise you could feed a squad for a week. Decent stuff too, not the K-4 meal bars either.” The Guard huffed before blinking then closing his mouth looking to Rarity. “I’m sorry Miss Rarity I shouldn’t complain when you’re paying like this, but …”
“No, it’s fine Dew Leaf. I wasn’t expecting extreme upper class show dining in midtown.” Rarity sighed looking up at the waiter. “Still I am rather disappointed at it, particularly with no warning and a supposed three star rating.”
The waiter sighed, a common thing with him it seemed. “The Boss has us doing it this way so we can even get the three star rating. The head chef doesn’t like it either, but no one comes into a unrated place anymore, or any where with less than three stars. That new food critic is all anyone talks about or will listen too.”
Rahs frowned at that. “Bork.”
“I have to agree with him dear, no offense to you but this has been quite the disappointment, do pass that on to your manager and inform him that, two beans and a splash of mustard, do not a four hundred bit meal make.” Rarity huffed.” You may take the plates back, we are done here.”
“There is the matter of the bill…” the waiter stated, looking at the Guard with them, he never expected tips anymore so he didn’t try to be nice as often.” Dine and Dash is a crime…”
“Good thing we didn’t have anything to dine on then.” The Guard responded meeting the waiter’s stare with his own, and a Ponyville Guard was not going to blink first, even a rookie. “And I’m willing to bet there’s an old regulation around that marks this sort of ‘meal’ as highway robbery.”
“Noted sir…..”the waiter sighed again, though he hardly cared, he still got paid even if the owner suffered.
[ Sweet Apple Acres]
Bright Mac and Big Mac stood on a rise looking over the southern fields, the ‘smaller’ stallion regarding the layout and the yield so far with interest.
“New layout then?”
“Eeyup.”
“ Still low magic though?”
“Nothing on tha crops.”
“Just tha gear.”
“Eeyup.”
“Seasonal help?”
“Not needed it yet. Might not anytime soon.”
“You gonna marry that mare?”
Big Mac blinked turning to glare down at his father who was worrying a strand of wheat in his mouth. The elder Mac looked up at the younger draconic looking one.
“Well?”
“Maybe.”
“Maybe?”
“Complicated.”
“Don’t see how with what yah did fer her and what she did fer you.”
“Maw and her brothers.”
“Don’t worry bout Pear, and her brothers seemed alright.”
Big Mac shrugged.
“Yah want her, go fer it. Git her afore some pony else does.”
“Don’t got tah worry much about that.”
“Oh?”
“She’s got a type.” Big Mac grinned, showing his fangs.
“Ah one of those sorts.” Bright Mac nodded. ”How’s the east field faring, still got tha durn bats?”
“Eenope.”
[Canterlot]
“That is the sixth place that is exactly the same, with the same over priced food, with small portions, and the exact same decor.” Rarity huffed. “Where is the originality, the quality, what is supposed to stand out to make one place more appealing than another?”
“And where can we go to get actual food?” Pinkie Pie whined.
“Not sure if there is a regulation for it Private, but I do admit it does seem like highway robbery.” Sergeant Nightsky offered after Private Dew Leaf filled her in on the situation when she returned. ”I know it wouldn’t fly in Ponyville or Lionheart, but I’m not familiar enough with Canterlot’s set of rules and laws to be sure.”
“Wuff.” Rahs stated sniffing the air.
“WHERE!?” Pinkie Pie demanded.
“What?” Sergeant Nightsky asked.
“Rahs says he smells something that is not the same mustard heavy mess that all these other places produce.” Rarity offered. “Shall we?”
The Guards, and Rarity quickly followed after Pinkie And Rahs.
[ Sweet Apple Acres]
“Mare, you really should have calmed down before then.”
Pear Butter paused from where she was looking for Applebloom. Her gaze swung over the hay bales nearby before spotting Sunset on the other side of her leaning against a tree. Pear Butter raised an eyebrow at the oddly deep voice that came out of the mare’s mouth , though Sunset shook her head and pointed a hoof down.
Pear turned her head back and looked down, spying a large white rabbit in a red vest staring up at her.
“What?” Pear asked.
“Sunset will ask me to show up here yesterday, so here I will be then.” White shrugged. “She seems to think that you had trouble with the time displacement you will have.”
“Ah read tha booklet.”
“But do you understand it?” Sunset added.
“Ah understand I was pulled away from my foals fer years and didn’t get a chance to watch any of them grow up or git their cutie marks. Applebloom doesn’t even recognize me.” Pear huffed. ”Why couldn’t we have been left in place once they rescued us?”
“Because if they left you there, everything would have been changed.” White added. “The timelines in which you two live have been counted by the pawful, when the ones where you die will are to be counted in the near infinite. The Sparkles cheated this by saving you and letting you die. Just as I will expect from them.”
“What’s that got to do with the price of carrots in Prance?” Pear Butter questioned.
“Had you not died your eldest daughter never would have left the farm and seen the rain boom. That chain of events spiraled into saving the world in countless timelines. Even the timelines she didn’t leave the key element was that you and your husband will be dead. That grief spurred her into other things. Not to say there have not been or will not be timelines where you lived and she did the same or where you were killed and she didn’t, but the majority involve your death forcing her to change something.” White tried to explain better. “ If you had stayed where you were, nothing that will happen would have happened.”
“Ah don’t follow but ah ain’t arguing with a talking time bunny.” Pear sighed.
“Ehh, good enough.” White shrugged.
“Then you need to realize your foals have grown up and stop badgering them like you are.” Sunset stated.
Pear glared at Sunset, then smiled a little.
“Clearly you ain’t had foals of yer own yet despite being oldern me.”
“Not for lack of trying, getting into Rahs’ pants is easy, doing it while he’s still in them too is a little harder.” Sunset shrugged.
“Too much information that will be.” White sighed shaking his head.
“Right. Ah will admit ah’m ham hoofing Applebloom, but Big Mac’s doing jus what ah expect.” Pear offered
“Ehh?” Sunset perked her ears up
“Big Mac as a foal was tha sort that when ah told him tah do something or Bright told him tah do something, he’d go to tha other parent and see if they would agree with the path he wanted. “Pear smirked. “Ah’m all for him and a Princess hooking up, but ah’ve already seen he’s being hesitant and shy, so, while ah play tha disapproving parent, Bright’s gonna nudge him into proposing.”
Sunset stared as White nodded. ”Yes, that worked when it will. But I will have suggested easing off a little.”
“Honestly ah don’t even mind tha dragon that much, seems like tha smart one of those three, but seems the same trick doesn’t work tha same way on Applebloom as it does Big Mac. But ah don’t know tha drake beyond what little bit’s in tha pamphlet. Honestly ah’m more worried about her friends Sweetiebelle an Scootaloo than him.”
“That is what we call common sense.” White offered.
“You’re coming off as speciest.” Sunset huffed.
“Is that a word?”
“It will have been.” White nodded.
“Hmm ah ken see how yah might think that, but did yah see me having any issue with that Kitsune running tha place we went out tah eat, or Applebloom’s teacher? We ain’t ever been picky on who we sell apples too if they have tha bits. Shoot, my daughters first colt friend was a zebra from that turnip farm outsidea town. Bad break up though , caught tha colt playing patty cake with a nother filly. Terrible thing fer a five year old.”
“Okay that’s something I’m going to have to ask about next time I need to embarrass her.” Sunset shrugged “Well what about Rahs?”
“Oh him ah don’t like. “
“What? Why?” Sunset questioned.
“Last four years of mai life have been with hostile diamond dogs running around stealing and hurting folks while they try to kill each other. Tah me he’s just a bigger one of them. Plus the fact he’s got six girls after him and he won’t choose. He’s either an indecisive wimp, or a Casanova type playing yah all. That mai daughters made friends with tha biggest dang Diamond Dog ah ever seen in order tah team up tah go after this one male, ain’t helping his case. “Pear Butter stated. “Ain’t nothing wrong with those herding folks, but this is gitting a little weird.”
“Rahs is not like that.” Sunset snapped.
“Ah call it like ah see it, and yer not much better teaming up with another mare or bug or changeling whatever, tah try an fight my daughter over him.” Pear Butter smirked. “It ain’t like he speaks Equish long enough fer anyone but mai girl and his kin tah even know what he’s saying.”
“There will also be Pinkie Pie and Rarity who understood him.” White offered.
“A nightmare, and a mare with a Nightmare in her.” Pear Butter glanced down at the rabbit. “ That don’t help his case either.”
Sunset glared and rubbed her temples with a hoof.
“This conversation did not go the way I expected.”
“It will go exactly how I expected though.” White nodded with a smile.
Rahs tilted his head at the set up. Pinkie Pie and Rarity had gone with counter paths while he had been out spreading the word about this place.
The Tasty Treat was a small shop not far from the main drag of copy cat restaurants with three stars. They had entered the building and found the owner Coriander Cumin and his daughter Saffron Masala had been arguing about the lack of business.
The five of them had been seated, and then treated to one of the better pony meals Rahs had had in a while. It was no Canterlot Castle Kitchen meal, but then again there wasn’t any where else that was. Still it might be a place to take the non-carnivores he was dating. Which oddly was only Trixie and Saturnia, though there were a few meat dishes, so the others were also possible. Rahs also learned what pain was when he sampled some of Pinkie's dish of 'Fire Curry'.
After Rarity and Pinkie Pie decided to get involved with helping, certain this was what the problem was, Rahs was sent out to see about attracting some business. Not seeing how the pair staying here would be much of a threat, given the recent destruction and imprisonment of the local Thieves Guild, he and Private Dew Leaf set out to post fliers and spread word of mouth, the pair of them splitting up to cover more ground.
Rahs came back before the Thestril Guard and was followed by a small crowd of those curious on exactly what the Moon Dog had been going on about.
Rarity and Pinkie were arguing over the display in the main room, with Rarity trying to set everything up the way the other places had been while Pinkie was trying to go harder into the native theme of the place. Rahs wasn’t sure what the ethnic theme was, but he liked it much better than the ‘cookie cutter’ designs that had been in all the other places.
Things were going rather well of course, those who came in tried the food and were enjoying themselves and the business was booming in truth. Rarity had slipped out to do her own form of networking and Pinkie had gone all in in helping Saffron in the kitchen. Rahs and Sergeant Nightsky stayed in the lobby helping Coriander when need be, but the older stallion seemed to have this sort of thing will in hoof.
The only worry was that Private Dew Leaf had not come back yet, and both Rahs and the sergeant were a little worried about that.
However before they could go look for him Rarity came back bringing with her a gaunt, stern looking white unicorn mare in a aristocratic coat.
There were a few mutters from those who were eating or still waiting for a seat, as Rarity presented the food critic, Zesty Gourmand.
[Sweet Apple Acres]
Witch-Jack paused her eyes closing as she counted down to her self, her ears flat to her head. Her mother was going off again about the Sparkles, her ire directed completely at Witch-Jack, and her interest in Rahs.
The Witch-wolf reached down picking up the main bulk of a old dead tree that she had been in the process of removing, Big Mac would come along later and pull up the stump, but tearing it down and carting off the brunt was her job. Her claws dug into the apple tree trunk, the hard wood splintering under her claws as Pear continued.
She finally let out a growl as chunks of the tree she was gripping turned to saw dust under her claws and the weight of the log hit the ground with a dull thud. Witch-Jack stood up straight, towering over her mother as she brushed off her claws, then she turned to face and stare down at Pear Butter.
“Alright. That’s enough.” Witch-Jack growled. “Ma, yah know that I love yah, and I’m ecstatic yer back and alive, but yer fulla shit and yah need tah shut up.”
“Applejack don’t…”
“NOPE. Yer talky time is done, yah been bitching nonstop about who all three of us have been interested in fer weeks now. First off yer not gonna complain about Applebloom and Spike again, PERIOD.” Applejack loomed, her mothers ranting finally pushing the farm mare to the point she was done with it. “Ah trust that dragon mor’n ah trust Twilight, or Princess Celestia. He’s tha reason a lot of things didn’t go too far, and why a’hm even still walking around. There ain’t no one gonna treat Applebloom better than he will. Even Big Mac didn’t bother with tha overprotective big brother stuff on him.”
Pear Butter blinked, not the slightest bit intimidated by her daughter looming over her, but she was rather annoyed that Sunset, Granny, the blue one of those fish ponies that was hanging around town, and that weird snake pony jumble of animal parts guy, were all in lawn chairs nearby with popcorn.
Witch-Jack spared a glare their way, but was building up a rather sizable head of steam and didn’t even bother to slow down.
“Second, an ah say this with tha utmost disgust, Twilight and Big Mac have been knocking horseshoes fer so long now a’hm surprised yah ain’t a grandmother yet. An lemmi tell yah those two are waay too intah each other. It’s like a goofy egg head romance from some bit store novel. Bitchin about them two ain’t gonna do a dang thing cept annoy tha crap outta everyone.”
Pear blinked, hiding a small smirk on that.
“Finally, Ah git yah got issues with Diamond Dogs cause what almost happened, but first off Rahs ain’t even a Diamond Dog, he was nearly killed by a group of them in fact. Not that that means jack any way since that lot is all dead and buried. As fer tha rest of yer complaining, he ain’t leading no one on and he ain’t being a wuss either. Ain’t a damn one of us girls told him to choose yet and we could at any time and he likely would, or he’d run off screaming tah be a hermit in a cave. Ah spect whatever would be tha most dramatic at the time in truth, but anyway. In case yah ain’t seen tha kinda girls he attracts, we’re all way too damn busy to keep all our focus on just courting him. Jynx is running tha largest pack of Diamond Dogs any one’s ever seen and more keep flocking to her and she’s working her tail off tah make sure none of um start anything. She’s also taking time out tah help train me a bit with this cursed form ah got. She’s prolly been on maybe three dates with him since they first met a couple of years ago cause she ain’t got tha time.”
Applejack continued not allowing her mother to speak.
“Saturnia’s pretty much tha go between from tha local government, the Changeling government and tha Goddess of Changelings, not tah mention she’s helping a mess of changelings settle inta town. She’s prolly managed tah be free about four times fer a date with him in tha last couple years. ” Applejack continued. “Trixie is always working and barely even manages tah show up here in town. She’s only managed about three or four dates. “
Applejack gestured a claw to Sunset.
“Between her getting accustomed tah modern Equestria, the crap with her mom, dad, whatever, helping around tha farm, helping Twilight with stuff, and now whatever thing she’s working on. Sunset how many dates yah been on?”
“Just three.” Sunset huffed. ”Not for lack of trying but no one schedules ever meet.”
“Then Aria’s shown up an been immediately swept up intah that new embassy stuff plus reconnecting with her mom, and now Sunset’s project. She’s only going on tha second date next weekend. And that’ll git canceled if tha table has anything pop up.” Applejack continued. “Everyone of us who are after Rahs ain’t in tha slightest bit of a rush. All of um are immortal save me an Trixie. Ah got no clue how long ah’m gonna live now, and knowing Trixie, she’ll either git Luna or maybe even Bleu tah help her stick around a lot longer so ain't any of us in a hurry.”
“Then there’s the political ramifications of everything.” Sonata chimed in. “Every one of the girls after the puppy are connected some how to a god or goddess or both. Rahs is the grand pup of Princess Luna, Twilight's his sister, Saturnia is the daughter of Queen Chrysalis and Empress Cadence, Aria’s the Daughter of Discord and Queen Aqua, Jynx is a God herself, Trixie was Trained by Princess Luna, Sunset is Princess Celestia’s Daughter, and Applejack is one of the best friends of Twilight, and currently under the watch of every god every where EVER!”
“Then there’s the betting pool.” Discord pointed out. ”Which makes things even weirder with who is betting on who. Let alone who’s eligible for what bets. The current prediction is this gets resolved in season nine. So only two to three more years if you count this one. Lyra bet on that one and so far no one’s bet against her. Nor does any one know how she got into the betting pool to begin with.”
Witch-Jack and Pear Butter both blinked in confusion at these rants, though Witch-Jack recovered first.
“Now fer Rahs you clearly don't know nothing at all. Him and his siblings have saved everything from a lost empire, to they world and everything in between. Including me and including you and Da. He's practically working fer tha Guard, considered royalty himself, and tha god of his own race. And aside from being as annoying as all git out when Zap apples or a certain annoying rabbit are involved he ain't a bad guy.”
“Well that's all nice but I still think you should find someone else.” Pear countered.” There's got to be a nice stallion some where.”
“Given time and poison joke he's that too.” Sunset smirked.
Witch-Jack stared at her mother a moment more before throwing her hands in the air and storming off.” Nope ah'm done. Applebloom's got tha right idea of avoiding yah until yah calm down.”
“What... hold on .. Jacqueline Jolene Joyce Apple get back here this instant!!” Pear Butter shouted at her daughters back.
“Jolene Joyce?” Sunset questioned.
“She's a JO JO!!” Sonata cried out.
“OH.MY. GOD!!” Discord cried out in a weird monotone voice.
Pear Butter and Witch Jack both looked over as Discord, Sonata and Sunset all suddenly adopted weird poses, and Discord and Sonata both had brightly colored wigs standing at weird angles.
Aria walked up on the other side of them looked at the Apples, then over to her family and Sunset as they flexed holding their poses, before she tilted her head glancing back at the Apples.
“Is this a Jo Jo reference?”
[Canterlot]
Well that was interesting and rather sad Rahs thought to himself. This unicorn mare hard ripped apart everyone involved in this set up and she hadn't even tried the food. The verbal berating had the entire crowd staring and wondering why they were here.
Rahs could see the flow of it oddly, the self important noble tearing down any one who didn't conform to their world view. It wasn't even a power from his portfolio, he just had seen a lot of day court growing up.
As such he had picked up a few pointers in watching said nobles be torn down, either by other nobles or by the Princess. After all, the mares words had marked her as little better than a bully, and trash cans and snark were unisex.
“Who exactly are you anyway?”
It was phrased loudly in a pause for breath in the tirade the mare was giving.
She snapped her attention immediately to Rahs who stared back impassively.
“I am Zesty Gourmand Canterlot's finest judge of proper dining.” She snapped at him.
“And who awarded you that title?”
“What?” The mare questioned, though the rest of the crowd seemed to start to wonder that themselves judging by the murmuring.
“What?” Zesty demanded again, her gaze shifting back to Rahs who stood before her staring down at the mare his arm crossed.
“He has a point darling.” Rarity chimed in rolling the 'darling ' in a way that any one who knew her would be worried about. “Something like what you claim, an accredited food critic, likely only would be earned by either a Royal Decree, or years of training with some kind of school. I don't recall such a proclamation nor such a school existing here.”
“The ponies of Canterlot needed me to tell them which restaurants are worth their time and attention.” Zesty snapped.
“Pretty sure that's what taste buds, noses, and eyeballs are for.” Pinkie Pie chimed in.” So they can taste good food, smell good food, and see something delicious. They don't need some one to tell them that.”
Zesty huffed her ears flattening to her head as she glared at the three before her, the murmuring of the crowd growing a bit louder.
“Well who are you three to tell me what I do is not important to Canterlot, that my words hold no sway!?” Zesty snapped.
“Two of the six Element's of Harmony and the fourth in line to the throne of Canterlot just after Prince Sombra, or Princess Sweetiebelle, depending on the day.”
Zesty whirled on the new speaker to see a green maned Thestril in Ponyville Guard armor, backed up by six Canterlot Royal Guards. Two of whom were staring at her while the others were running their gaze across the rest of the place.
“Ma'am if you are finished with your meal please move on as there is a line forming and we would prefer if everything remained calm and orderly.” one of the Royal Guards stated looking directly at Zesty.
Zesty blanched at the statement though she whirled on Saffron.
“I will see this place fail, everyone will know how terrible this is. I will make sure you never work in this town again so much as scrubbing dishes for this!” Zesty growled.
“Ma'am I would just like to point out that communicating threats of any kind is frowned upon in Canterlot, particularly in front of eight Royal Guard, and after you have already been asked to leave.” The first Guard spoke up again. “If I need to tell you to move along again, I will ensure that you are moved along to a cell for processing, for failure to abide by a lawful order, on top of anything else we might witness here to use against you.”
Zesty tensed looking like she was going to argue before huffing and storming out of the restaurant.
After she was gone the first Guard sighed and looked to Private Dew Leaf.
“Rookie, when we agreed to check this place out after you described it, I didn't expect that would mean I would have to work on my lunch break.” the Guard offered.
“Yeah sorry about that, but I didn't expect all..., well whatever that was. Coriander can we get a table for six?” Dew Leaf asked gesturing to the Guards behind him. “These guys are from the local posts around here, after the whole three star thing started it got too pricey and too stingy to eat near their posting. I figured I'd point it out to them.”
The Guards were seated and orders were given, the rest of the customers continuing on as they were.
The Table Team set back to work helping out the Tasty Treat ensuring that Saffron could keep up with the orders.
With the Guards satisfied, word spread rather quickly among the ranks and the rest of the day had Guards in and out with either take out orders or stopping for a bite. Unlike the nobles, the common ponies of Canterlot did still know what the Guards did and had respect for them. And this many Guards in one place drew their attention rather quickly, and the smell of the food plus curiosity kept many more around to sample the place.
By the time the day was over Pinkie and Rarity hadn't even noticed their cutie marks had signaled mission complete, and Saffron Masala and Coriander Cumin were already discussing needing to hire some more ponies on to help if business stayed any where near this level.
Rahs of course had already reserved a table for two at the end of the week for his date with Aria and another two weeks later, because if any one would appreciate fire curry it would be Sunset.
“Just for the record. I would like to point out that I was not staring at your butt, just in case Scootaloo decides to take offense.” Firefly added from the corner from behind a comic book.
“So what, you were staring at mai butt?” Applebloom demanded.
“Nope, not playing the game.” Firefly offered turning the page.
“Told you he was smart.” Scootaloo laughed.
“Right so did you two glean any insight from staring at my butt? I might not have any interest in colts staring at my butt, but I don't have any real interest in fillies doing it either either.” Sweetiebelle grumbled.
“Well.. no.” Applebloom sighed. “But we already tried psionically willing our marks to appear and that didn't work before either.”
“Did we try willing cutie marks on each other?” Scootaloo asked.
“Yeah. And yah didn't git a chicken cutie mark so it didn't work.” Applebloom smirked.
“Prolly for the best, then Spike would be after me, not you.” Scootaloo smirked back.” I could deal with that, he's cute enough.”
“Hey!” Applebloom and Firefly both protested as Scootaloo cackled.
“This isn't helping me get my cutie mark.” Sweetiebelle grumbled. “I'm the last pony Crusader who doesn't have one.”
“Changeling's don't get Cutie marks, neither do dragons.” Firefly offered, then considered.” Well Half changelings have gotten them in the past, but I'm not a half changeling like Princess Saturnia is, but even she doesn't have a cutie mark.”
“That doesn't make me feel any better.” Sweetiebelle huffed. ”Babs got her's first, then Scootaloo, then Sombra, and now Applebloom. This is totally unfair.”
“Don't worry Sweetiebelle. Like Scoots said before, just cause we have our marks doesn't mean we arn't still Crusaders and we're gonna keep at it until all of us have our Cutie marks.” Applebloom stated.
“Yep, and now you got two of us who managed it all set to help you out with ideas and plans tailor made to you.” Scootaloo smirked. ”Firefly, you got the list?”
“You mean the book.“ Firefly lowered the comic, the Changeling in his normal form his green eyes shifting to the table were he nodded his head to gesture with his horn at the massive bound tome sitting on the table.”Volume one of things you've tried is almost complete. Spike's prepping a second tome for Sweetiebelle's attempts.”
“Alright so we know where we've been, now we jus need to figure out where we are going.” Applebloom stated.
“We got this Sweetiebelle.” Scootaloo smirked. “You'll have your mark before you know it.”
“Thanks guys.” Sweetiebelle sniffed.
[Seshat]
Spike lifted his head from his Dungeon Master manual and stared at a wall as if he was looking into the far distance. He had been keeping his distance from Sweet Apple Acres and Applebloom until her mom got used to him, or just gave up and accepted the unstoppable force that was Applebloom.
“Crusader Senses tingling.” Spike muttered.
“I'll alert the Guards.” Seshat sighed.
[ Canterlot Castle]
Princess Celestia raised an eyebrow as she looked over the throne room door.
The guards on either side of her along with a collection of nobles and all her asides also stared at it, Day Court being held up due to the situation.
Starched Collar stared at the door highly unamused.
“Of course this happens when I go on vacation for a week.” Starched huffed. “Given I was not here this does not count against my families record.”
Princess Celestia looked at him with a raised eyebrow then sighed as she pushed open the doors with her magic. The large, impressive and most importantly, completely upside down doors.
Climbing over the top of the door's arch Celestia stepped into the room walking on the ceiling. Everything in the room was upside down, her throne was above her, the chandlers were hanging up from the floor and even the stained glass windows were upside down.
Princess Celestia blinked then frowned, noting that nothing in the room was magically flipped. Her throne was simply glued to the ceiling which was the actual castle floor.
All of the court's pews and seating were also on the ceiling, even the carpets. Celestia looked down at the ceiling she was walking on blinking a moment when she spotted a small stain by one of the pillars that had formed when the roof leaked the last big storm, in the exact spot she had pointed out, only now it was on the room's new 'floor'.
“How did those three even pull this off?” Celestia huffed realizing that she needed to step up her game.
[ Ponyville Town Hall]
“Alright Raven….. lay it on me.” Mayor Mare groaned, not for the first time considering early retirement. ”I thought this was over.”
Raven Quill sighed, wondering if her sister had to deal with this sort of thing in Canterlot. ”The Cutie Mark Crusaders evidently have redoubled their efforts to make sure Princess Sweetiebelle gets her cutie mark. To this end as of this morning they started with a number of small attempts at Sweet Apple Acres. After the turning six apple trees into Grape Fruit trees, Applejack made them leave the farm. Thankfully Applejack contacted the Guards Assigned to protect them, or us from them, before they left. As such from nine until eleven there was no reported damage.”
“Thank Luna for small favors.” The Mayor muttered. ”Pear Butter needs to get over her nonsense about Spike and let him run damage control again. Fire fly is not cutting it.”
“He tries, but Spike has far more experience. At around eleven o'clock they decided that they would try to gain Sweetiebelle a ‘Escape the Guards’ professional Thievery’, ‘Hide and Seek’, or a ‘Buck the Police ‘ Cutie mark, and some how managed to get away from the Guards following them. Not before at least two of them were sent to the ER with a mild concussion, and the other from damage from falling into a barrel of a few hundred angry crayfish.”
“I am morbidly curious, and yet..” Mayor Mare muttered.
“At twelve noon they broke for lunch. Thankfully Applebloom, Scootaloo, and Firefly convinced Sweetiebelle to go to the Hay Burger rather than try to make lunch herself.” Raven Quill offered.
Both mares in the office shuddered.
“ With a possible world ending disaster avoided, the group proceeded to do a number of mostly harmless tasks, including becoming a changeling, changeling repellent through emotions, and speed running some video games at the arcade.” Raven Quill listed.” That might be why Firefly hangs out with them, that had to be quite the meal. Once they ran out of bits, they then tried for a video game repair cutie mark. Fortunately for Coin Op, the arcade's owner, Sweetiebelle took offense at the other girls pointing out how great a cutie mark in fixing games would be to help with her colt friend Button Mash. As such they didn’t crack open a machine.”
“Is Button her colt friend?”
“No idea. However Coin Op was less than thrilled when the resulting embarrassed brawl blew out several machine’s, ‘crystal memory cores’ ,a cheap fix thankfully, but one that erased a lot of high scores that ponies have been working on. That resulted in a minor riot that saw the arcade’s snack bar burned to the ground.”
“Add it to the list.”
“Already done. Around one o'clock, the crusader’s were kicked out of the Neighlantis Embassy. No one knows how they got in there, nor how they got the Pearl, nor how they managed to set fire to a kelp forest, but it was noted that the Pearl does work on changelings, and Firefly was a large green crab.”
“I told them to invest in Crusader insurance.” The Mayor sighed.
“Things went quiet for some time after that, during which time the frog pond exploded again, though the Crusader’s were reported to be no where near it despite Scootaloo screaming out ' we didn't do it' from near the school house on the other side of town. At three thirty the Crusaders were spotted again chasing a panicked hydra along the edge of the Everfree, the beast was down to two heads and was running fast enough that the Guards who spotted it couldn’t tell if the heads were growing back.”
“Ahhh stars.... I don't know whether I should be worried about them in that forest, or anything that meets them.”
“Thirty minutes later they were all sitting in a lecture as Fluttershy scolded them for traumatizing the hydra. That only lasted five minutes before there was a stampede of Star Spiders including the god Murphy running from the Everfree. Many of them, including Murphy were on fire, or at the very least singed. They all took refuge in the old Rich Manor.”
“No one’s bought that place yet?”
“Given what happened around it, no. At five o’clock there was another stampede of Star Spiders, running back into the forest, nearly all of them soaked and or sporting some sort of strange coloration, including Murphy. The crusader’s emerged from the Manor a few moments later, not long after that , the west wing collapsed.”
“Please tell me that’s it.”
“So far it seems so as they all went to Spike’s for a Ogres and Oubliettes game.”
“School cannot come back into session fast enough.” Mayor Mare muttered.
[Seshat]
“Once again Trixie would like to welcome everyone to the second meeting of the F.A.R.S. Group.” Trixie stated standing at the front of the table.
“What does that even mean?” Jynx asked.
“Females After Rahs Sparkle.” Sunset huffed. ”It's a stupid name.”
“It's better than yours.” Trixie snapped.
“Hey W.O.O.F.S. Was a classic name!” Sunset snapped back.
“What does 'that' mean?” Jynx asked again.
“I was still working on that part.” Sunset muttered
Aria stared at the other girls sitting around the table wondering what the hell she had gotten herself into.
“Trixie would again like to thank Seshat for allowing us to use this room, and not chasing after Fuzzy herself.”
“Some one needed to keep an eye on you lot and I told you before, I'm a tree.” Seshat's voice called from a wall.
“As if that means anything.” Saturnia huffed.
“Alright I have got to ask. Why is this a thing? If all of us are after Rahs why are we having a meeting... with tea and cakes?” Aria demanded gesturing to the rather sizable spread on the table between the girls.
“Pinkie Pie.” Apple Jack explained.
“Errr.”Aria questioned.
“She's like a hyper version of your sister.” Sunset added.
“Oh.”
“As for why this meeting is even a thing, it's mostly an organization thing. All the gods who are involved in this nonsense want it to be fair, so none of us are allowed to interfere with any other date. So we need to plan for who has what time off and adjust accordingly.” Saturnia explained. “It's a bit more of a pain in the butt than it needs to be, but it was easier with one meet up a month to plan out the time with Rahs, rather than trying to fight each other over certain days.”
“Princess Luna said no fighting. I am quite content to follow that order, even now.” Jynx muttered.
“And it ain't like we're all not super busy.” Applejack offered.
“This makes a weird kinda sense.” Aria sighed. “Still, I'm surprised you lot aren't more aggressive with it though, trying to get any edge on any one else.”
“What makes you think we're not?” Trixie questioned.
“Plenty of things. This whole set up, the lack of discussion or threats or chatter about who's gotten further with him.” Aria huffed.” I mean shit, do any of you even know if his dick is knotted or barbed given his weird species mix?”
“Knotted.” Jynx, Sunset, and Applejack all stated at the same time.
There was a momentary pause as that word was processed. Reality itself seemed to freeze in that instance as six minds processed it and reacted accordingly.
“HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT!?!” all of them screamed out at the three who knew that, who also screamed at each other.
“Ah shit.” Seshat grumbled.
In a heavily shielded lab underneath Seshat, a red gem started to glow a little bit brighter.
“So yer gonna join fer tha running of the leaves this year?” Witch-Jack asked taking a sip of a mug of cider as she looked over at Twilight on the other side of the table.
“That's the plan, with Rainbow Dash finally making it into the Wonderbolt reserves I figure every pony helps with how you two usually go at it. Plus I'm hoping it helps with adjusting to the earth pony part of me now. “Twilight sighed.” Unicorn I've got, Pegasus I'm working on though I'll never be a good flier, but the earth pony side of the magic I've not even attempted to use as of yet, but supposedly it's more passive then unicorn or pegasus magic.”
“It is a bit. Ah new a gal who could plant her hooves and grow anything out of tha dirt from a seed.” Granny smith offered from her own seat at the table an amused expression on her face as she eyed the other two mares at the table. ”Not sure where she went but talents like that while rare, ain't too hard tah find.”
“Yeah been a bit weird fer me. Ah've had tah relearn a lot of stuff due to how wonky magic gits around me, even mai own, but pretty much most earth ponies tend tah jus be tougher an stronger. The Apples got a green hoof of sorts as just tending tah things allows us tah help um grow without us needing tah focus or anything.”
Twilight took another sip.” I'll have to look into that to see if I'm capable of anything like that or if being an alicorn just gives the basic durability package.”
“Yah could ask tha Princesses.” Witch-Jack stated.
“True, though Cadence was a pegasus, Celestia's dad was a unicorn. I'm not sure what Luna's dad was, but since Sombra is a unicorn, though an odd one, I expect that's what her father was.” Twilight shrugged. “And I really don't feel like being a student to any of them.”
“Still annoyed at her?” Granny Smith asked.
“A little, but like the deal with my birthday party and parents, I've kinda gotten over it. It's hard to stay mad at them. What my parents did worked with Shining Armor, and Celestia has been doing the sole ruler crap for so long she's sort of stuck, but she's trying to change at least.”
"Fer give me if ah ain't as fergiving." Witch-jack huffed.
"Fair enough, she didn't even try to talk to you first. But given the reactions of every god that heard about you i can understand why she reacted that way." Twilight shrugged a little.
"Still need tah have words with her about that." Granny Huffed. "She's been avoiding me."
"Does she still owe you bits?" Twilight asked.
"Nah she paid them back." Granny chuckled. "Sucker bet any way and she took it."
Rahs let out a small sigh, his eyes darting over to Big Mac who also had an exasperated expression on his face. The two met eyes then rolled them and tried to shift a little, a some what difficult thing to do given Twilight had worked her way into Big Mac's lap when he sat down, and Applejack had dropped down in Rahs' making him quite glad he wore pants, and Witch-Jack tended to wear shorts of some kind. Still it was taking a lot of focus thinking about plays and scripts.
They both glanced to the side where Pear Butter spied on them from outside the kitchen window, an annoyed expression on her face after Granny threw her out earlier.
Neither of the males thought the others in the room didn't notice her, particularly how Witch- Jack's tail was wagging.
“I did not get up this morning to be a chair.”
“What was that Rahs?” Witch-Jack questioned, her shift to look at him grinding her rump into his lap a little more.
Rahs only whimpered a bit.
[ Canterlot, Wonderbolts HQ]
“So they made you a full on reservist? That's great!” Scootaloo shouted looking at Rainbow Dash in her new uniform.
“So why not a full time bolt?” Sunset asked.
“EoH ruling.” Spike supplied. “She's too important as a protector of the realm to actually be with the Wonderbolts full time, particularly with the map table being brought into it. So she can't go on any of the longer tours or any where that isn't more than a days flight from Ponyville.”
“How do you know all that?” Sweetiebelle demanded.
“Because I actually listen when people tell me things.” Spike rolled his eyes.
The group of Crusaders had come to Canterlot with Sunset who had to drop off some paper work for her network before she could move on to actually building the first few. Spike needed to pick up his comic pulls and Sweetiebelle was going to visit Princess Luna as she had been avoiding staying over at the palace due to the prank war, not wanting to get dragged into it.
Scootaloo had dragged them to the Wonderbolts HQ just outside the palace before they went to see Luna, because word was Rainbow Dash was there.
And it seemed Scootaloo was correct on that.
Applebloom had brought up the fillies obsession and asked Firefly if Scootaloo had him change into Rainbow Dash yet on one of their dates.
This started a brawl between the crusaders that tore up thirty feet of road, broke a blocks worth of windows, and destroyed some poor stallions cabbage cart.
Sunset , Firefly, and Spike finally reigned the trio in, though none of them were even sure how Sweetiebelle got involved. But they had ducked into the Wonderbolts HQ to avoid the Guards that had shown up to investigate.
Sunset didn't want to pay another fine because of them after all.
[Canterlot Castle]
"Luna. Luna we need to have words." Celestia frowned as her sister held up a hoof slowly downing another mug of coffee before setting it aside.
"We need about three more of those before we are willing to discuss politics." Luna grumbled, the dark alicorn never having been a morning pony, despite the fact her morning was around six in the afternoon.
"This is not about politics."
"Then two more cups." Luna sighed allowing her mug to be refiled, the Mug reading "don't talk to me before I've had my coffee' with the words, 'before I've had my coffee ' scratched out. " Is this about the Sparkles? Did you figure out how they did the last prank?"
"Yes, they disconnected the throne room from the castle and flipped it 187 degrees." Celestia huffed.
"187? is not upside down only 180?"
"Yes it is and i thought that was what was done when i magically flipped everything back, but it seems Twilight added the extra 7 just so my scrolls roll off the side of the table. It's just enough to notice the room is still out of balance, but not enough to tell why without studying it."
"When did you have time to study it?"
"Pompous Twit day."
"Ah yes. We too dislike Saturday Court." Luna nodded reaching out to run a hoof along Tiberius' back as he scarfed down another powdered doughnut. "So what is your plan for revenge then?
“That's the issue. “I've got so many ideas I'm at a loss which one to go for.” Celestia grumbled.
“Really?”
“Yes, option paralysis is a real thing.” Celestia huffed.
“Fine then we shall do our part in this conflict, we have a prank that shall surely cause them to beg for mercy and to surrender.” Luna smirked waving her mug.
“Ummm are you sure about that Lulu?” Celestia frowned.” You've never been the best at pranking.”
“Of course we are. Our pranks are legendary, did you not see the look on the face of that one noble from Mosscow when our last prank came to fruition?” Luna stated.
“Luna no one saw his face because you simply teleported in and hit him with banana cream pies for fifteen minutes. We thought he drowned.” Celestia chided, then paused.” Actually I would like to see what the Sparkles would do if you did that.....”
“Nay, we have a much better plan this time, and they shall never recover from it. MuWAH HA HA!” Luna cackled.
“Well at least this will give me the time to figure out what I'll do next.” Celestia sighed.
[Wonderbolt HQ]
"So you're complaining cause they gave you a nickname?" Scootaloo questioned.
"Yeah, i don't want Rainbow Crash to follow me through my whole life." Rainbow Dash grumbled.
"Would you prefer it to be Daddy?" Spike grinned getting a murderous glare from Rainbow Dash.
"Don't you bring that up again." Rainbow Dash growled as Spike cackled.
"Question." Firefly raised a hoof, the changeling in his 'Scootaloo colors' disguise
"Dash made the Rainboom that startled Twilight into hatching Spike and pulled Rahs from the Oneiroi. The pair of them started calling Dash Daddy and gitting her fathers day cards and crap. He thinks tha joke's still funny." Applebloom offered in deadpan, clearly long used to explaining this sort of thing while Spike was cackling.
"No further questions." Firefly lowered his hoof.
"Rainbow Dash seriously. You're gonna have to deal with it, no flier gets to pick their call sign, they're either assigned one or earn a nickname some how. Do you think Bradshaw wanted the name Goose? No, he plowed into a flock of them during a trick and the name stuck. Heck he's got the most valuable trading card now because of a misprint that left an 'o' out of his nickname. Fleetfoot earned Flatfoot cause she stomped on the Captain's hoof, Misty Fly's is Dizzy because she nearly knocked herself out in a triple loop, Surprise is Slowpoke cause she's got the worst off the mark speed, High Winds got Hoof in Mouth because he ran into the back of another flier and nearly choked on her back leg. Dad got called Clipper cause his first day off the ground he clipped a flagpole with a wing and spent a week in medical after his first day. And I'm legally bound by two NDAs not to say mom's out loud."
"I guess Crash isn't that bad then......wait.... Dad? Mom?" Rainbow Dash blinked, her brain trying to process."Your folks are Wonderbolts? Who?"
"DANG IT!! Scootaloo flat out told her and she didn't git it, AH was So close!" Applebloom ranted.” That pot is massive ah coulda retired!”
“Retired from what?” Sweetiebelle asked.
"Ahh there you are. I heard you and your friends were in the building. I should have expected it after that mess outside."
Rainbow Dash turned, her eyes getting even wider as Spitfire trotted past her scooping Scootaloo up into a hug.
"Hi Mom!" Scootaloo chimed in .
"You guys wanna get something to eat?" Spitfire asked, “I've got about an hour of lunch break. I've heard there's a new place on the row that the Guards like, supposedly it was endorsed by Prince Sparkle too."
"Oh yeah, The Tasty Treat, we went on a date there last week." Sunset chimed in. "Foods great. Wasn't quite hot enough for me last time, but the main chef said she'd have something for me next time I came by."
"What." Rainbow Dash stammered.
"Is dad coming?" Scootaloo asked.
"Nah, Soarin's still got a ton of paperwork to do before he's to go any where. I mention food to him and he'll never get it done." Spitfire chuckled.
"Spitfire and Soarin....?" Rainbow Dash stammered.
Sweetiebelle sighed. "Well I'm out my bits. Who had Spitfire herself telling Dash?"
"I think it was Fireball again." Spike offered. "I'll have to check the notes for the pot when we get back to town. I know Rahs and Twilight are going to be mad. I was sure Pinkie Pie was gonna let it slip since no one made her promise not to."
"My sister's still winning the betting pools huh?" Spitfire snorted before the group started heading out leaving Rainbow Dash staring after them.
[Ponyville, early fall, one week after Rainbow Dash had a mental break down after finding out who Scootaloo's parents were. ]
Spike, Twilight, and Rahs all stood outside of Seshat looking up at the night sky.
The collection of Ponyville Guards who were also stationed in the other side of the massive crystal tree also stood outside and stared at the sky.
Tempest Shadow, Grubber, and Starlight also all stared at the sky.
An angry dramatic Raccoon, a half grown Phoenix chick and a long suffering owl also had their gaze turned skyward.
The rest of Ponyville took one look at the night sky then one look at those around the crystal tree who were also starring at the sky, and decided that this was none of their damn business and hoped it would go away.
Far above Seshat in the night sky was a gathered collection of stars in a formation that was far too clear to be any sort of constellation.
The glowing sparkling bits of light in the sky formed an arrow pointing down directly at Seshat with clear words above it reading, 'Dumb Dumbs live here'.
The lights in the sky were likely visible in the entire northern hemisphere of Equss.
Twilight was the first to speak.
"Well. Seems Luna has gotten involved finally." Twilight offered.
"At least it wasn't pies."
Spike nods in agreement with Rahs as everyone else outside who was staring up turned their attention to the Sparkles.
"Still." Twilight. "This cannot go unanswered."
"Of course not." Spike huffed." Plan delta?"
"No, if we bring in her phobia of snails, she might use sn... ss... Sna... snakes, or quesadillas or a snake quesadillas." Twilight shuddered. "I won't sink that low."
"Wuff." Rahs suggested.
Twilight and Spike both considered before nodding.
"That will work, and it's just as silly as this." Twilight agreed before the trio headed back inside
"Do I count for this? I mean since while i technically live here, i am also the here that they are living in?" Seshat asked to no one in particular.
"Is a deep hole in the ground as a prison still an option?" Starlight asked Tempest.
"I'll ask." Tempest frowned, glad she wasn't required to protect Twilight from any pranks.
[ The next Day, Ponyville, Lee-ho Foxes]
“Are you sure about this Tempest?” Starlight asked with a small frown. “I'm still getting some death glares from some of the towns ponies and half of them don't even know I did anything aside from annoy the Sparkles.”
“Honestly that's usually enough. If the Sparkles are annoyed at something, there's usually enough property damage that it becomes everyone's problem. Twilight is surprisingly non confrontational unless annoyed. “ Tempest explained. “ Rahs has a more even temperament, but when he's set off he tends to only let the one he's annoyed at know first and everyone else finds out by what's left of the one that annoyed him. With Spike unless he wants you to know it was him, you won't, and if he wants you to know, it usually involves the Cutie Mark Crusaders. I don't know enough about Shining Armor to give more information other than he comes down like a 'Hoof of god' if he gets pissed.”
“This does not fill me with confidence.” Starlight sighed.
“Ehh I've been living with them and studying them for a while, mostly so I could see the signs of when I needed to run. But anyway. You've been cooped up for too long and Twilight started to harp about you finding friends after that fiasco with Moon Dancer and her husband, so I figure I'll introduce you to the mare I met when I first got here.” Tempest shrugged. “She's not local so we only meet up for lunch every so often when she's in town. I will warn you she's a bit of an acquired taste, but I've enjoyed my time with her.... been a while since I've been able to say that.”
“I'm still getting over cutie marks, I didn't expect to be dumped into friendship lessons too.” Starlight grumbled.
“It's one of Twilight's portfolios, with her study habits and mind set coupled with that I'm surprised she isn't trying to make a... I dunno, school of friendship or some such garbage.” Tempest snorted. “In any event don't worry about the cutie mark thing, I don't care for mine and she's got talents that don't focus on hers. I just have a few words of advice.”
“Well lay it on me.” Starlight muttered.
“First off don't ask about her other talents, because she will show you and I don't want to fill out the paper work on why there is a new crater in town while the CMC are in school.” Tempest offered.
“Ooookay.” Starlight blinked.
“Secondly if she asks if you are interested in Fuzzy, she means Rahs. I would highly suggest saying no and giving a very detailed description of why not that doesn't insult him. Just telling her he terrifies you should be enough.” Tempest offered spotting the pale blue and white maned form of her unicorn friend already sitting at a table with a menu.
Trixie Lulumoon looked up and smiled, waving a hoof as Tempest and Starlight approach.
[ Much later]
“Alright sorry it took so long Tempest, but between all that's going on I've not had the time, so just hold still and we'll get a scan.” Twilight offered.
“Yeah between setting up the network and dealing with Pear I've had my hands.... hooves full.” Sunset added. “Still we cracked the familiar/ companion code, so we should be able to pull this off too.”
“I'm just here to add insight and take notes.” Starlight shrugged smirking a little as she considered how the meal with Trixie went, when she wasn't focused on Rahs she was rather fun.
“Okay this shouldn't take long. I'm going to check over your mana lines and see how the flow is going and Sunset is going to use blood magic to do her own scans. Don't worry about that Blood Magic is over hyped as dangerous.”
“No it's not.” Sunset grinned.
“Ignore her. With luck we'll have a working base to go from with these scans.” Twilight continued.
“Every unicorn, heck every pony has a different set up with their mana lines and even skeletal composition. With unicorns this is doubly true with horns, everything from spiral course, to length, to girth, to position on their head can effect it.” Sunset offered.” With how yours is broken we're going to have to do a false reconstruction to see how it's supposed to be. This is doubly confusing as your horn was broken when you were little and the damaged horn grew.”
“That in itself is surprising as your horn is still shattered instead of grown over like one would expect.” Twilight considered.” That's probably a small side effect of you still casting through it with the amount of mana you have. You don't have any limiters and you might very well have blown off bits of your horn when you let loose.”
“Great.” Tempest winced.
“Don't worry too much on that at least it means your mana channels are not damaged.” Sunset explained.
“Alright while Spike and Rahs are preparing for the retaliation against Luna, lets get this scan underway.” Twilight smiled.
"Well now, I will say this again, but I am quite surprised you managed to actually make it on time for once Darling. " Rarity waved a well manicured hoof. "When we first agreed to these meetings to try and bond a little better past our shared, and not so pleasant, history I fully expected you to put a little more effort into meeting."
"Like ah said before and every other time Rarity. It's hard to get away from chores and such. Yah might be able tah hold off working on a design or dress every once in a while, but a lot of what ah do has strict time tables. Plus it's harvest season so me gitting a day off is even rarer." Applejack offered sitting back in the steam room. "It's gotten a lot easier since Ma and Da are back, plus Sunset, then Twilight , Spike, and even Rahs help out from time tah time. Tha fur ball don't even gripe that much any more. Hope ma ain't too hard on him today though."
"Well given your relationship I would expect he wouldn't gripe." Rarity tittered.
"Mai relationship? What about yers? " Applejack scoffed."You and Sombra been gitting mighty close these last couple ah years. And ah'm pretty sure tha whole town recalls that 'something of mine' rant."
"Please, nothing came of that and I corrected him, I am still his parole officer as it were." Rarity pish poshed the notion.
"Yah ain't fooling anyone Rares." Applejack snorted. "He's a Prince, he's tall and dark, and from most view points ah spect he's considered handsome. That ticks every single one of tha boxes yah been pining over fer years."
"I maintain my excuse."
"Better tell Sweetiebelle, Princess Cadence, and the rest of the town that then, cause tha betting pool fer yer weddings gitting ridiculous."
[Sweet Apple Acres, Fall]
Rahs raised an eyebrow looking down at Pear Butter.
Pear Butter glared up at Rahs.
Big Mac and Bright Mac had run off to check the other fields.
The Crusaders were in school.
Sunset was with Twilight working on Tempest's horn.
Granny Smith had pulled out a rocking chair and was watching the pair of them with a grin.
Pear had gone off on a tangent about how she didn't think Rahs was right for her daughter, Rahs found himself agreeing with most of it.
He was a horrible choice of colt friends really, which was why he didn't understand how six girls wanted him. It couldn't be the prestige of dating a god or royalty as most of them were after him before he ascended or was given that title by Luna, and the two that showed up after had more sway than he ever would.
Pear Butter's rant made some sense. He never professed to be a hard worker or have any interest in farming, save for the Zap Apple thing, those were better than catnip. Though his interest was less in the farming of them, and more of the eating of them until he made himself sick.
He did find the Timber wolf howling thing helpful in tracking down the few of the beasts he hadn't destroyed that were still in the Everfree. The bounty on them wasn't very high due to how they regenerated from most hunters taking them down, he got a small bonus to each because he devoured the magic that held them together and forced the spirit or supernatural emotions to finally dissipate.
Thorax's brother had come on a few hunts with him, the changeling's emotion detection ability was great to hunt the bundles of emotion that held the timber wolves together. Pharynx considered hunting timber wolves some sort of Bachal, or battle challenge in common equestrian.
Oh wait he was zoning out again, right focus on Pear Butter again.
“ Yah don't even speak pony yah just bark” Pear Butter continued.
“Meow.” Rahs offered.
“HA Yah got him speaking fancy” Granny pointed out with a chuckle.
Pear Butter blinked then shook her head before starting up again.
Was it important this time?
No, she was going off on the 'grand pup' thing again.
Rahs wasn't entirely certain how that would work, and Twilight refused to research aspects of her brothers love life no matter how interesting it might be.
Jynx and Saturnia, were already known to be able to have children with him. Jynx because Diamond Dogs were the source of the Moon Dog race to begin with and the genetic drift wasn't that far off, and Saturnia because changelings could breed with anything. Kinda like dragons and Bards in that aspect.
Trixie and Sunset were a little harder to predict, while there were pony Diamond Dog hybrids , they were super rare. And given Sunset tended to change to her human form so she could wave her boobs in his face when she could, not that he complained, made an extra layer of oddness to her.
Aria was a hybrid herself, and if she and Rahs ever had kids there was literally no telling what species it might wind up.
And Applejack was an oddity too, no one was even certain if she could have foals or pups any more after this due to how Witch wolves were created.
Not that he was thinking of having any kids, that he could train in the theater, and make the cutest little acting troop ever to live... no he wasn't thinking of that at all.
Wait he zoned out again.... what was Pear on about now? Oh, how he was standing there doing nothing instead of working. He had tried to leave once and she called him rude to walk off while she was talking.
"So the point of all this." Rahs spoke out cutting off the mare and making Granny Smith lean forward in her chair with interest. "Is that you do not like me, or that fact that I am dating your daughter?"
"Well, you picked up that much at least." Pear Butter huffed.
"Ahh good. I was a little worried you would actually like me."
"What?" Pear Butter blinked.
"The majority of plays and stories where 'happily ever after' happens, also include a very angry mother in law who disapproves of everything." Rahs concluded. "I was a little worried we wouldn't manage a happily ever after if you approved."
Pear Butter blinked her mouth moving silently like a fish as she processed that. Rahs took the silence as the conversation being over before he walked off to finish the chores he promised Applejack he would do for her today so she could have her day off.
Granny Smith cackled.
[Ponyville Spa]
Witch-Jack sat back in the hot tub, a flare of magic from another guest had changed her, and she had been forced to switch to the biped set of chairs and tubs. A small deviation, though Aloe and Lotus took it all with the professionalism everyone was used to.
They were both currently buzzing around some of the other guests as the spa was rather crowded today for some reason, though it was mostly ponies so the biped area was still empty save for her.
She looked down at herself, her orange fur clinging to the odd form she had now, she still felt the over sized breasts were in the wrong place, but she was getting used to the weight change. Still, durn things weren't supposed to be this big unless one was nursing.
Not that she minded the bonus interest Rahs showed her due to it, and having met other Moon Dogs and Diamond Dogs this wasn't uncommon. She was just glad none of them had rows of nipples going down their belly like an actual dog.
She relaxed a little more and dunked herself in the hot water, letting her blonde hair loose to fall over her shoulders and face as she surfaced and leaned back against the edge of the tub again.
With Rarity elsewhere she was left with her thoughts for the time being.
What did she want out of this? Her mothers ranting did bring up a few good points. She still wasn't sure if it was the curse or her own self that was attracted to Rahs. Sure she was no longer two things in one body, but when they got stuck together did that part come from the curse?
She blushed remembering the forest before shaking her head.
Yeah well she remembered that and wasn't that upset with it. And she did like the guy, but she also remembered that before the curse she didn't like him in 'that way'.
So was what she felt now from the curse, or because she changed her mind?
They didn't really even have that many similar interests, though the couple of dates they had been on were fun and she did look forward to the next with the sort of anticipation that made her tail wag, which was weird as well.
She opened her eyes looking through her hair to the tip of her tail where the little glowing crescent was, the faint light from the crescents over her ears showing in the water as she looked down.
She supposed that was her answer. She enjoyed the time they spent together to much to simply stop it and she was willing to deal with all the other girls in order to have more time with him.
Heck, she was still mulling over the deal to share with Jynx, something that was looking like a better and better idea. If that two of them couldn't pull him away from tha others working together tha pup was blind.
She needed to talk to Rarity about the outfit for the next date. She briefly wondered if she could get a matching dress for Jynx and pull her along to tag team him.
It would be a lot of fun and it would annoy her ma.
Win Win.
[Canterlot Castle, later that evening.]
Princess Luna and Princess Celestia stood on the balcony staring up at the sky as Celestia had lowered her sun and Luna had raised her moon.
Princess Luna's left eye twitched.
Princess Celestia blinked.
"How...." Celestia began.
"We are done." Luna snapped.
"What? No! I need your help sister, I have so many plans I need your expertise for." Celestia protested.
"Nay we are done, if THIS!" Luna gestured to her moon "Is their idea of a counter prank to our own adjustment of the stars, then we do not believe we can survive the inevitable escalation from them or you."
"It's not that bad...."Celestia placated.
"Not that bad!? LOOK AT OUR MOON SISTER!!"
On the surface of the silver moon that hung in the sky was a crude drawing of Princesses Luna's face carved in the surface, next to it was the line 'We are not as cool as we think we are.' also carved into the surface taking up the entire facing of the moon.
"How did they even do that without our notice!?" Luna ranted. "And we are exactly as cool as we think we are. We are the goddess of nightlife, and unlike Twilight Sparkle we know how to dance!"
"Not sure moves you learned in a rave or a club count as dancing...." Celestia muttered.
"Silence!! We are done, we know when we have been bested." Luna snapped her horn glowing as she turns the facing of her moon to hide the message until she could figure out how to erase it.
Celestia and Luna blinked as the new side of the moon faces them.
The new side of the silvery orb had a message that read. 'Discord was here. So was Sonata!' with the pairs faces carved in the rock.
"I thought you erased that?" Celestia offered.
"We erased the other message he left, we did not know about this one." Luna growled turning the moon to another facing. This facing had a very large dragon shaped crater in the middle.
The pair stared a moment.
"No Luna."Celestia sighed. "We don't need the problems that would bring."
"Fine." Luna huffed and turned the facing to an unblemished side. "We need to go now and make sure the Royal Astronomers are not losing their minds again."
"Just tell Nightlight his sons and daughter did it, he'll get the others inline." Celestia offered, already plotting her counter prank for this one.
[One month after the royal Canterlot Astrologers Guild went on strike.... again... Mid fall, Ponyville, Seshat]
“Alright that looks good. Are you sure the other towers are calibrated?” Sunset asked.
“Look I supervised the damn things going up, everything is to the specs you gave.” Aria snapped.
“My crews did exactly what you told us, so if there is an error it is on your end.” Saturnia added.
“Look can you blame me for being nervous here. Aside from a few tests this will be the first time this has been fired up fully. I've got it routed through the table here as so far I've only been able to build the two PCs with the parts I can get here. My tablet's not powerful enough to be a hubcap. and I've not even got it rigged to use the tablet's frequency just yet anyway.” Sunset offered.
“I don't think it's called a hub cap.” Aria pointed out.
“Do I look like I had time to go to computer engineering school while I was over there? “Sunset offered.” Hell, with how many years you were there didn't you get a computer engineering degree?”
“Field changed too fast and money was always fairly tight for us. I took courses of stuff that was mostly stable. With a different curriculum every month and with how fast computer stuff was changing I didn't have the time or cash to take that many classes. Particularly with how stupid pricey they got.” Aria explained.
“School was expensive?” Saturnia questioned.
“Not so much public schools for kids, though those were getting there as the people in charge cut funding to them, but college was almost a scam at the end with how expensive everything was and how hard it was to get a grant or a loan.” Aria grumbled.” Just while I was there it went from being able to get a job with minimum wage and pay for your tuition and other things, to needing to work four or five jobs just to afford the books, let alone the classes."
"That is ridiculous. How did anyone get the training they needed to to be productive members of society if school was behind a paywall?" Saturnia frowned.
"Most didn't, they worked menial jobs until their bodies gave out then either died, had to go on welfare, or became homeless. I met quite a few people like that my first few months there." Sunset frowned. "Any way if we keep talking about all the problems that place has we'll be here for weeks."
"Agreed." Aria muttered. "Keep in mind though Sunset what you saw was the end result, we watched it happen real time. That sort of slow building suffering didn't help anyone."
"Alright, I've got four things to send through today, a standard text, a file, a image file and a live audio file. Moon Dancer is on the other end and knows to respond back." Sunset offered.
"So what's the hold up?" Saturnia questioned.
"I'm trying to think of the best line to send through on the first text of this new system." Sunset frowned.
"If you do that stupid Wazzzzup thing I will tear the system down myself." Aria grumbled
"Tempting but no, this is a momentous occasion. I had several choices, I needed something important and impressive. I was just choosing which one." Sunset hummed as she typed something in. The other two looked at the message and sighed.
"So you asked Rahs." Saturnia smiled.
"So I asked Rahs." Sunset chuckled as she hit send.
[Crystal Empire]
Moon Dancer looked at the screen with Cadence, Shining Armor and Chrysalis looking over her shoulders as Sunburst tried to keep the foals from destroying the system.
"So what's the message?" Chrysalis asked. "What did Sunset send?"
"All the worlds a stage, and all the mares and stallions merely players. They have their exits and entrances; and one in their time plays many parts." Moon Dancer read.
"She asked Rahs." Shining Armor confirmed.
"Seems so." Moon Dancer replied sending the confirmation message back.
[Ponyville]
"Alright. they got it. response time is acceptable levels for the Beta test." Sunset nodded. "Alright time for the data dump."
"The Sparkle's book?" Aria asked.
"Yep." Sunset offered and hit send." Just the prologue though, Moon Dancer has to check through it for errors and that was the quickest thing."
The sound of hooves drew the attention of the three to the two mares entering into the room Starlight and Tempest entered and looked around curiously.
"Well she's not in here." Tempest frowned." Did you check the lab?"
"There is no way in Tartarus I am going near that lab." Starlight shook her head, “Besides I thought she would be here. Have any of you seen Twilight?"
Sunset frowned. "Come to think of it no, and she was interested in seeing this set up. Got confirmation on the file. I'm sending the image file now."
"Picture of Rahs?"Aria sighed.
"Of course. An image immortalized in history." Sunset cackled. "More points to me for this one."
"Come to think of it i figured Rahs or Spike would be here to see this, Spike was rather interested in it too." Saturnia offered. ”Something about being able to play O&O with Shining again.”
"Hmmm, Seshat have you seen any of them?" Tempest asked.
"All three of them left at the same time this morning. About five am. I am not sure where they were going but Twilight was mad about something and Spike almost seemed to be sleep walking. Rahs was simply worried." Seshat offered. "They headed for the train station, but past that i don't know."
"That's worrying." Starlight muttered.
"Yeah, but this could be a Celestia prank, and i want nothing to do with that." Saturnia offered.
"Fair enough." Tempest frowned. "I was going to check in the the Guard post anyway, I over heard talk about a few ponies that were supposedly missing, including a couple of foals."
"Hmm. Let us know if you find anything out Tempest." Saturnia offered. "I'll see if we can't put together another Changeling search party if there is an issue."
"Right." Tempest offered trotting off.
"Okay so this is the last thing, a live audio file. Moon Dancer's going to time the song as she receives it and I'll time it here. That should let us know any lag issues."
Aria looked at the record." This is the one you picked? Not much a fan of pop, but it's not bad."
"There's far too many similarities between worlds, including the music. The one from the other world was sung by a male, but this one was based off a short lived music career of Spitfire's. But here we go." Sunset smiled clicking the mic on and starting up the record player.
"It's nine o five and you're listening to 904FM, some of the hits some of the time. SAVE FERRIS!" Sunset called before she set the record needle down letting the song play.
Usually when this was the case, someone else was going to be a lot less happy than she was.
Unfortunately this time she wasn't entirely certain what was going on and as such was simply fuming to herself about missing a scientifically important event.
And having to get up early due to this.
Not to say she didn't know anything about what this was. After all her baby brother was glowing like a light bulb and it evidently itched.
That was the call of the Dragon Lord as Bleu had explained once when she was asked about dragon leaders.
The glowing part was the warning that a dragon had been summoned to the Dragon Lord's presence, it came with a sort of homing sense of where to go. The itchy part was to make sure they showed up, dragons could ignore glowing scales for a long time, but itchy scales? That brought them running.
What bothered Twilight was not the fact that Spike was glowing. Although that was of interest.
What bothered her was that both she and Rahs were also glowing, if only mildly itchy.
What bothered her more was that there were twenty two others from Ponyville and Canterlot on the train, including one of her evil exes, Percy.
Granted Percy had yet to look up from the sketchbook he was drawing something in and he really wasn't a bad date.... Twilight just didn't think he ever knew he was on a date. It was kinda weird to see this sort of thing from the other side. At least she thought it was the other side, everyone said she was focused too much on books and missed things, but that was ridiculous.
At any rate most of the Ponyville glowing ponies had freaked out seeing The Sparkles here, though calmed down seeing they were all glowing too, as that meant it was going to be some one elses problem soon, and whatever caused this would be paying for the inconvenience.
Also it meant that the event was likely Element's of Harmony related, and they could bill the train fare to the crown.
Bets were also being placed.
Twilight suspected all of those here had dragon ancestry of some sort. Granted that did not explain her or Rahs.
“Gaaaaaah this is boring.... I could fly faster than this....”
Or Scootaloo.
Given how her family was involved with those Pegasi supremacists before Spitfire and Fireball were born, it wasn't likely there was a dragon any where in Scootaloo's line.
That bit of information had Twilight consider other options, and the only thing she could think of for why Rahs and herself were glowing along with Scootaloo, was that all three of them at one point had been dragons, either through dimensional travel or poison joke.
This was a very stupid theory, but at the same time the most likely one.
The train would take the group of them to the station at the end of the North West line, and if they wanted to continue to the dragon lands they would need to walk the rest of the way.
Most of the other ponies were going to stay at the end of the line fully expecting the Sparkles to deal with the glowing thing.
“Chill Scoots.“ Spike offered. ”The Actual Dragon Lands are a good bit away. We've got another couple hours of ride left before we have to get off the train and walk another hour or two. We've been up here a couple of times to talk to Bleu.”
“Ugh.....” Scootaloo groaned.
“Well we can always work on ideas for Sweetiebelle's cutie mark.” Spike offered holding up a note book.
“Where did you get that?” Scootaloo asked.
“Rahs had it in his coat.” Spike explained.
Scootaloo looked at the lounging and some what glowing Moon Dog.” You have a Game-colt in that coat of yours?”
“Wuff.” Rahs responded.
“What?” Scootaloo asked.
“He says he does, but he only has one game and it's his nuzzle lock Pony-mon run.” Spike explained.
“Dang it. Ahh well least I'll get to see a buncha dragons at the end of this.” Scootaloo huffed.
“No you won't, you're headed back on the train, or at the very least staying with those at the station.” Twilight offered.
“No I'm not, I'm going to see the dragons.” Scootaloo explained as if she was talking to a foal.
“No you are not going.”Twilight stated.
“You're not my mom.” Scootaloo huffed.
“I know your mom.” Twilight countered.
“So does everyone else in Equestria, you're not special.”Scootaloo responded.
“Scootaloo I am ordering you......”
“You're not a Princess either.” Scootaloo stuck her tongue out.
“Yes she is.” Spike snickered.
“Shut up Spike.” Princess Twilight Tuesday Sparkle snapped. “Scootaloo you are not coming with us.”
“I'm fire proof already, and I'm already out here I might as well see. I mean heck I got summoned.” Scootaloo offered.
“Scootaloo as the responsible adult here I am forbidding you to go.” Twilight snapped.
There was a momentary silence, before Scootaloo, both her brothers and every other pony on the train from Ponyville started laughing.
“I hate all of you.” Twilight growled.
“Wuff?” Rahs asked.
“What?” Scootaloo questioned.
“He wants to know why you even want to go.” Spike translated.
“Oh that's easy. There's gonna be a bunch of other dragons around, including female ones his age. Some one's got to keep an eye on him for Applebloom after all.”Scootaloo explained.
Spike glared as Rahs and Twilight both laughed this time.
[ End of the Line, Station]
“Wow there's a lot more here than I expected.” Twilight offered.
The train station at 'End of the Line' usually didn't get more than a couple of ponies or other species a week. Sure there were a couple of Earth Pony farms here that wanted to take advantage of the volcanic soil to grow food, but aside from a general store and a Guard outpost the place was barren save the train station.
So it was with some surprise that the station master, which was a rotating two week position, and the local Guards, had no idea how to deal with nearly a hundred glowing ponies and a hoof full of other races. The scant Guard presence was keeping order for the moment, but several of them noticed the alicorn that got off the train and seemed to have visible relief that it was now some one elses job to figure this out.
A Kirin Guard trotted up to her with a small bow.
“Not a Princess.” Twilight huffed at the bow.
“Ahh, you're that one.” The Guard nodded. ”Any way what ever is going on chose a bad time for it, seems the Dragon Lord called a meeting up there in the cauldra. We've had a few of the friendlier dragons come by and let us know already. I'm not sure if they are massing for another migration or what, but I've not seen this many dragons out here in a while.”
“The Dragon Lord called the dragons to a meeting, or the dragon god did. Evidently all these ponies have some dragon in them and were called as well.” Twilight explained. “I'll see what's going on you just make sure everyone gets back home, keep the trains running or something until everyone is sent back.”
“As you wish, though I see a flaw in your theory.” The Kirin Guard offered.
“What's that?” Twilight raised an eyebrow some what miffed she was being called into question.
“I'm not glowing, and I seem to be the only Nox- Cal here.” the Guard offered.
Twilight blinked looking at the Guard, then to those gathered around, then the Guard again.
“Well shit..... I missed that.” Twilight huffed. “Ugh what else can go wrong?”
“FUZZY!!” A light blue unicorn cried before plowing into Rahs' side sending the pair of them crashing off into the tree line.
“You said the words.” Spike nodded sagely as Twilight cursed.
Rahs Sparkle was more like his sister than many would expect. Not his biological one, though there were similarities there too.
Sure he was more interested in plays and theater than books and science like Twilight. He was also almost two more ponies taller than her, a biped and had better taste in fashion, better table manners, he could cook, he wasn't prone to panic attacks, he had a sense of humor and a sense of style, and he looked damn good in a dress....
Okay, okay, so he was quite different from his sister.
Though one did not grow up with someone without having some similarities. One of those right now was showing itself.
No, not due to Trixie being there, he actually liked Trixie.
No not missing something obvious like Twilight did, he found that funny.
No, Rahs Sparkle was annoyed, and when he was annoyed things that made him annoyed tended to have a bad time.
As such by the time he, Twilight, Spike, Scootaloo, and Trixie had made it to the largest group of dragons near the big volcano, quite a number of dumbass trees had been planted.
One of them, some stupid red drake that no one could remember the name of, Spike thought it was gargle or something had gone right for Spike while Twilight was plowing a spot in the ground for the next crop of stupid to be planted, with said next crop of stupid.
Rahs had put on his mask tossed his coat to Trixie, grabbed the drake from behind, lept into the air with him, spun around a few times for good measure, and planted him rather firmly, head first into a rather large rock.
Spike rolled his eyes at the show, Scootaloo cheered him on, Trixie had nearly swooned, and Twilight had complained that it messed up the feng shui of the clearing she had made with the whimpering red weed wacker she was using.
In any event, by the time they got to the volcano proper, word of them coming had reached the dragons there. The smart ones or the ones with longer memories than a goldfish decided to be on the other side of the volcano.
Bleu had come out to see what was going on along with her son Dragon Lord Torch.
“Ponies? And a tiny drake? This is what the commotion was?” Torch huffed. ”I do not have time for this.”
“Sparkles,what the shards are you doing here?” Bleu questioned, the tiny dragon barely seemed like she would be noticed by the mountain sized behemoth before them.
The three Sparkles, Scootaloo, and Trixie all looked at each other. The the ponies reared up gesturing with their forehooves at themselves and the others while the bipeds did the same with their paws and claws respectively to the blue dragon showing they were all glowing as an obvious 'DUH'.
Bleu blinked a moment before she glared up at Torch. “Did you forget to select you only wanted dragons with that damn thing again?”
Torch frowned.”Of course not, I tuned out all the Nox- Cal, last time I forgot to do that we lost three score of dragons to those damn things. Stupid sexy Nox-cal.”
“Well you seemed to have forgotten to tune out half breeds too.” Bleu sighed. “How many more am I expecting?”
“Hopefully none. Most of them listened to me when I said to stay at the train station. Except these two.” Twilight grumbled.
“Like I was gonna listen to Twilight.” Scootaloo stated staring up at Torch.
“Fuzzy was coming here, so of course so was Trixie.” Trixie stated as if it was obvious.
“You seem to know this lot mother, who are they?” Torch growled though that seemed his default tone.
“That ones the blue mare I told you I empowered for the Storm King thing. She's Searing Basalt's great granddaughter. The small dragon is your younger brother, Spike, The blue dog cat thing is Rahs Sparkle, the purple pony is Twilight Sparkle, and I have no idea who the orange one is.”
“Scootaloo.” Scootaloo offered.
“The orange one is Scootaloo.”Bleu told her son.
Torch leaned down a bit more looking directly at Twilight who simply raised an eyebrow at him.
The massive dragon let out a sigh and looked to his mother. ”This is why you were laughing so hard wasn't it?”
“What?” Bleu questioned.
“On the migration, when this is Twilight Sparkle.” Torch grumbled.
“What? Oh! Oh.. Oooohhhh....” Bleu snickered.” Well she's a goddess now, so a step up from the ones you usually like.”
Torch rolled his eyes.
“Wait... hold on, him, me, no.” Twilight shook her head, then paused looked up at the dragon lord and considered, then shook her head again.”No. I'm seeing some one now.... ask me again in a couple thousand years, I might have a different answer.”
Spike and Rahs both made faces like they were gonna throw up, Torch was possibly blushing, and Bleu was just staring at Twilight.
“Now that that horrid mental image is gonna live rent free in my head for a while.” Spike grumbled.” “What is going on here?”
“Torch is about to announce that.” Bleu offered. ”Come on, I got good seats for this this thing.”
“Dragons of Equestria, hear me!” Dragon Lord Torch bellowed from the top of a volcano to those gathered in the cauldron. I have been Dragon Lord for longer than many of you can remember, and my reign has been extraordinary!”
There was a moment of silence.
“AGREE WITH ME!!” Torch roared and all the dragons cheered him.
“I taught him that.” Bleu grinned leaning over to stage whisper to Twilight.
The group of them were seated on a rise on the other side of the Cauldron, though with how loud the dragons were it was easy to hear them. While the seats were not designed for ponies, they were warm and could be used like benches.
“Unfortunately due to Dragon law I am forced to step down.” Torch continued.”Sad I know.”
“There's no law for it, he just wants to retire so he made this up, not like most of those here would ever read anything.” Bleu offered.
“BE SAD!” Torch roared and all the dragons started crying.
“He certainly has quite the stage presence.” Trixie pointed out.
“Wuff.” Rahs agreed.
“And this is why I have called you all here. There needs to be a new Dragon Lord to come after me, even though none could ever replace me. But the new Dragon Lord will need to be the best at being a dragon. As such there will be six trials for the participants to engage in. The Dragon Lord must prove that they can force dissenters to obey. The TEST OF STRENGTH!”
There was a moment.
“CHEER!”
The dragons roared their approval.
“That's the one that most dragons excel at, it's just a one on one fighting tourney. It's gonna be used to whittle down the ones remaining for the last contest.” Bleu explained.
“The new Dragon Lord must be able to lead from the front and thus be faster than any other. Hence the test is THE TEST OF SPEED!”
There was cheering.
“DID I SAY CHEER?”
There was silence.
“NOW CHEER.”
There was cheering.
Rahs even clapped at that. The Dragon Lord could work the crowd.
“This ones pretty simple, it's a race.” Bleu shrugged. “Fliers have the advantage here though.”
“The next test is a throw back to our lean times, when there was not much food. A Dragon Lord must be able to eat anything and show that they can survive on it. THE TEST OF CONSTITUTION. CHEER!”
“This ones something Char came up with, he has no desire to be Dragon Lord, but he wanted to design a test. It's just an eating contest with really bad food.” Bleu shrugged.”I'm glad Char at least tried.”
“Dragon knowledge of lore and history is passed down by word of mouth from dragon to dragon. Heroic fights are remembered by all, but a Dragon Lord must have the creativity to keep all attention ion themselves. Hence THE TEST OF LORE! CHEER!”
“That ones going to be fun. It's basically a story telling session, and the ones with the most rapt audience of dragons will win.” Bleu pointed out.
“The next test will show how clever you are. Same rules as Drake Rugby.” Torch offered.”LAUGH!”
There was a collection of riotous laughter.
“This will be THE TEST OF WISDOM.”Torch roared.” CHEER!”
“What?” Twilight tilted her head.
“Dragon rugby is a sport played with a large chunk of pumice that slowly breaks down during the game, the goal is to put the rock in a lava pit on one side of a field or another. The only rule, is win. Cheating is encouraged, but if you are caught, you're out.” Bleu explained.” This test is basically to see how well you can cheat without getting caught. It's sort of a stupid one because some one winning who doesn't cheat will be thought to be a great cheater.”
“Finally at the end of this will be the Gauntlet of Fire which will test everything those who make it to that point will have left. This Bloodstone scepter will be placed in the middle of the flame-cano. The one that retrieves it shall be the next Dragon Lord.” Torch shouted. “CHEER!”
“So what you're saying, is that this was just a mistake due to how the scepter works?” Twilight questioned.
“Pretty much.” Bleu shrugged. “He forgot to tune out half breeds as well as Nox-cal. Honestly not the first time that's happened, but Torch's used that call thing so rarely it's kinda understandable.”
“Fascinating” Twilight muttered taking notes much to Bleu's annoyance, though the dragon god was weathering it as a curious Twilight was easier to deal with than an angry one.
Rahs rolled his eyes as Twilight took complete advantage that Bleu felt bad about them being called out here to get as many questions answered as she could. The way she was going it was likely that they were going to be here for the whole event. Rahs could understand that as Celestia and Luna would need to know about the change in leadership as quickly as possible, and it was unlikely Bleu cared enough to tell either of them.
“I refuse to call you uncle.”
Rahs glanced to the other group that had gathered. Scootaloo and Spike had been approached by a young blue dragoness who had been wondering what was going on. Bleu had introduced her as her granddaughter Ember. She was the one Bleu supported to win the title, something Torch was pissy about as he didn't want her to enter. They had argued, and Bleu won of course.
Ember had been introduced to the Sparkles, Trixie, and Scootaloo. She had ignored Rahs for the most part, gotten confused by Twilight and Trixie until she noticed Twilight's wings, and had been annoyed that Bleu considered Spike older than she was, and then was even more annoyed that they were related.
Rahs considered her a tsundere.
Twilight had been surprised he read enough of Fluttershy's Japony comics to know the word.
Oddly Ember got along with Scootaloo well enough given the pegasus teen was interested in the events of the contest and physical fitness enough to point out the issues some dragons might have with the race and fighting.
Trixie on the other claw was snatched up by a fairly large red and gold colored dragon. Before the Sparkles could react Trixie waved them off and looked resigned as her great grandfather, Searing Basalt went on a tangent on how cute she looked and that she needed to visit more often. He then demanded an explanation of what she had been doing since the last time he saw her.
Trixie had spent the time regaling him with her heavily embellished exploits though she had managed to get Bleu to admit that ,Yes, Trixie had helped with the Storm King invasion, before Bleu was dragged back into Twilight's research.
When Trixie got to the point about Rahs, the dragons eyes narrowed and he stared at Rahs as if he was going to burn a hole through him with just his gaze.
Rahs sighed. Between Applejack's parents, Big Mac, Granny Smith, Discord, Celestia, and occasionally Chrysalis, he was used to glares like that. That the glare was coming from a dragon actually made it easier to ignore compared to some of the others.
At the end of the day Bleu told Ember to show them to the guest cave and flew off to get away from Twilight. Rahs grabbed her tail as his sister tried to fly after her commenting about how Twilight would likely fly into a volcano if she tried to talk, fly, and take notes at the same time.
Ember took off leaving the group alone, Trixie was staying with her great grandfather and Rahs broke out the camping gear from his coat. As the four of them sat around the campfire with Twilight adjusting her notes while Spike cooked dinner, Spike spoke up.
“So I'm gonna compete in this thing.” Spike offered.
Rahs raised his eyebrow.
“Spike, no.” Twilight snapped.
“Spike, yes.” Spike snapped back.
“Forget it, you're still to young for this sort of thing plus there are a lot of big dragons in this who would destroy you first chance they got.” Twilight snapped.
“Please. With everything that I've been through?” Spike huffed.
“Yes against ponies, or when you were calling for help, or against things that are not actively trying to kill you.”Twilight ranted.
“And the crusaders.” Spike stated
Twilight paused. ”Okay one point for you.”
“HEY!” Scootaloo snapped.
“But still this is too much. I'm not letting you do it.” Twilight pointed out.
“I'd like to see you try and stop me.” Spike growled.
Twilight narrowed her eyes. ”I can you know.”
“BORK!” Rahs interrupted making both of them wince and Scootaloo looked confused.
“Right we are guests.... wouldn't want to damage this... lovely cave....” Twilight rolled her eyes.
“Wuff?” Rahs asked Spike who sighed.
“Simple. These are other dragons in a contest. I want to do this because I want to know how I stack up after living with ponies all my life. I mean I know living with you two has not let me go soft at all, but I want to know how I rate.”
“Yeah I'm in too.” Scootaloo nodded.
“Wait what?” Spike whirled as did Rahs and Twilight.
“I want in on this too.” Scootaloo offered.
“Why!?” Twilight demanded.
“Not to win or anything but the first events the story telling. I have a few ideas for that, the second is the race, and you're out of your Sparkly minds if you think I'm gonna miss a chance to race actual dragons. Third days the eating thing and the forth is the fights.” Scootaloo explained. “Much as I wanna try the gauntlet thing, I don't think I'll join the fighting. I'm good, but not throw a few hundred tons around by the tail good.”
The three Sparkles blink and stare at the pegasus.
“You realize both your mother and your aunt would find a way to kill us if something happened to you.” Twilight muttered.
“Pfft they can't even control me half the time, what would make anyone think you three could?” Scootaloo grinned as the Sparkles all rubbed their temples.
“You realize if you win you'll have to stay here right?”Twilight asked.
“Pfft, no I don't. I can go back to Canterlot and force the dragons to integrate with Equestrian society.” Spike grinned.”Can you picture the look on the Princesses faces if I do that? Not only do the dragons get better acomidations, but the sheer volume of paperwork and the screeching of the nobles will be epic. A sure win for the prank war.”
Twilight and Rahs looked at each other then back to Spike, before they both grinned.
“I taught him well.”
“You didn't teach him crap, he gets his smarts from me.” Twilight countered.
“Right I'm still doing this and I have a plan.” Spike grinned wider. “And since Scootlaoo's not actually running against me I don't care if she hears this. After all, cheating is supposed to be allowed if you aren't caught.”
[ The following Day , Dragonlands]
Twilight stared at Trixie.
Rahs stared at Trixie.
Both Spike and Scootaloo also stared at Trixie.
“Whhhhhhhhhhhy?” Twilight demanded of the blue mare.
“Mind your own business Sparkle. Trixie has her reasons for joining this event.” Trixie huffed sparing a glance to where her grandfather sat in the crowd wearing a scaled up version of her hat and cloak.
Bleu and Torch looked at Scootaloo and Trixie when they were told the pair were joining the competition.
Torch looked down at his mother.
“Meh they glowed, they're good.”Bleu shrugged.
Torch rolled his eyes looking at Spike with a raised eyebrow, but he didn't say anything about him as he flew back up to his perch.
“DRAGONS.” Torch bellowed from atop his volcano. “The first event is about to begin There are a hundred dragons participating in this event. The rest of you will go and listen to the story that most entertains you. Once the stories are over you will choose those which you liked the best and the top 50 will move on. Aspirants Move to your places.”
The participating dragons and two ponies moved to spread out over the cauldron. Once every one was in position Torch nodded.
“BEGIN” Torch roared.
Rahs wandered among the groups, his ears perking up as he listened to the stories told with some interest. Some were tales he had heard before, others were new, some were in draconic and he had no idea what was being said, but others were in Equish which was slightly odd but evidently it was a more nuanced language that made the stories easier to tell. Plus Bleu had forced all of them to learn it.
Twilight was sitting on a rise with her eyes closed and her horn glowing.
Scattered over every story teller was a quill plucked from her own wings and a massive roll of parchment recording all the stories as they were told. There was a lot of strain on her face running that many recording spells at once and keeping them separate and translated from draconic, but she was powering through it for the chance to write down a hundred stories that could be put into books as new stories.
Rahs frowned listening to some stuttering and rambling, stories that were the same as others, or those that wouldn't make the cut. There was going to be a fair amount who didn't make it and one or two started out weak and couldn't regain the crowd. But there were some that the speaker emoted the roles, or told the story with such emotion, that even if the story itself was crap those listening were enthralled. Rahs made note of these dragons with a smile.
Then there was Spike. Rahs knew what story he was telling as soon as he wandered past.
“In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat. It was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort.” Spike offered gesturing as he continued.
That particular tale would wind up being a horror story to the dragons, Rahs was sure of it.
Scootaloo was doing something as well but she was copying the story Sunset had told them. Rahs could tell it was a space opera, there were a few of them out there.
“ Help me Obi-won Kenobi, you're my only hope.” Scootaloo spoke, she had also drawn out a map of sorts on the ground around her, sketching scenes in the black sand as she told the tale.
Rahs took note of the enthralled dragons as he moved on.
Trixie, well he knew exactly what story Trixie was telling too and he hadn't expected that one from her, though to be fair it was a romance of sort.
“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.” Trixie offered, her horn glowing and showing several images of other characters from the play at once.
Rahs grinned as he moved on listening to some of the other stories.
The small globes of light on Rahs' ears and the crescent on his tail glowed brightly.
“So.” Bleu asked shifting on the rock she was stretched out on looking down at the current days contest.”How are the new foals of your brother?”
“Not bad, still destructive as ever. I already have plans to load them up with sugar before I send them home the first time I foal sit them.” Twilight offered as Rahs snickered.
“Wuff.” Rahs offered.
“Meanwhile my brother here, who is from the bottom level of Tartarus, is planning to get them art kits for Hearth's Warming. He is also going to make sure that each kit contains, hoof paints, glue, and several tubes of glitter.”
Bleu turned her head staring in horror at the demonically grinning moon dog.
“Why do you ask?” Twilight questioned.
“I was curious as to if you had a reason why they might both be gods. A lot of us thought it was your companion spell, but Maohk and Iinii's son, Star Cloud, is just a demi god.” Bleu hummed. “ A lot of the other gods were getting curious about it as well. Who all has the spell?”
“Right now both the Princesses, Cadence, you, Iinii, and Aqua. I also had Celestia give it to.... give it to...” Twilight hesitates.” The Goddess of Healing, to double check everything.”
Bleu nodded. “I get that but I also remember the geas you placed over the spell that we would forget it if we tried to give it to any one else. And I am highly curious why that is.”
“Spike's suggestion actually. With that sort of thing to offer I can hold a lot of sway in various Council votes if I want something to go my way I have something of a bribe I can use.”
“Clever drake.” Bleu chuckled looking back down at the current contest.
There was a massive stone table set up down below with a pile of various ….things for lack of a better word atop of it. The items in question might have once been considered food, they were very much some sort of meat and fish and what might have been a bunch of charcoal bricks.
There were no gems or stones of any kind in the pile as even the most porous of rock wouldn't be a issue for dragons and would hardly be a challenge. So plant matter and countless weird seasonings and various meats were 'cooked' and set before them for the competitors to eat a meal of it.
The total by the end of it had dropped down to thirty left. But all of them were wary of the three that barely showed any sign of the bad food save being full.
Scootaloo, Trixie, and Spike.
Trixie claimed she had eaten worse at some dives she had been to on the road, places where 'health code' was little more than a suggestion some one mentioned a few decades prior.
The other two were regularly forced to eat Sweetiebelle's cooking and anything short of acid was an improvement.
[ Turtle Toga]
The pirate island of Turtle Toga was used to oddities. Given it was a pirate haven, and a den of smugglers and ner do wells among others was hardly it's main oddity.
That a city the size of Ponyville was build on the back of a massive sea turtle named El Toro, made it a bit odder. That the turtle was still allowing the city on it's back due to an agreement with a pink maned eco terrorist after she nursed him back to health cranked that up a little more and made the leaders of the town, villi onus as they were, wary only made it odder.
While most of the town was filled with bars, seafaring suppliers , docks and airship docks, that changed with the storms that swept past or how deep El Toro swam that day, there were a few more permanent fixtures.
The keep, simply referred to as The Barnacle, at the islands center was mostly unoccupied , but it served as a meeting place for the lords of the island, the top ten pirates ran the island with a shaky agreement that was not helped by the fact that the members of this Lords circle changed depending on success, failure, or if they survived. This keep was one of the few places that could survive if El Toro went under water. The spell protecting it put a bubble of air over the keep and a few blocks around it, leaving that part of the city the most expensive to live in. The rest of the city was either rebuilt constantly or was durable enough to survive the swim.
Due to the price ranges involved most of this part of the city was markets and shops. The main drags on either side of the keep were called Market Street, and Portabello Road. While Market dealt with the run of the mill shops for food and supplies, Portabello road, street where the riches of ages are stowed, anything and everything a chap could unload is sold off the barrow.
It was at this street that two individuals walked , a pony mare with a surprisingly large mane, and a towering yeti with a sword nearly as big as he was wearing a leather vest closed over his chest and stomach.
The yeti and the mare with him gained a number of odd looks as they came through the city, though they were given a wide berth after the yeti split a pick pocket in half with his sword.
The pair had been watched, though most of the attention was on the yeti as they made their way to a few shops and paid a rather hefty sum for a few items and a large amount of various rare regents.
Most were only wary of yetis as a whole given what had happened with the Storm King, and the fact the crazed god was still missing, though aside from the pickpocket the yeti didn't bother any one else unless they bothered the mare he was with. Luckily most stayed away from her as well after the first because even if he hadn't killed the pick pocket, the white furred beast smelled of death, and the cold earth of the grave.
His companion smelled like she bathed in a score of different types of perfume all at once, and hurt more noses than the yeti's scent did.
Some more enterprising individuals followed after them, bribing the shop keepers for what they had purchased, as information was more valuable than mere trinkets sometimes.
While the list was fairly vast, none of the items purchased seemed to fit together in any way, and neither did the more exotic herbs.
Rumors spread about that some of the items were thought to be used in necromancy, and at least one of them was a supposed alicorn amulet. The others were old lost relics from the dead empire of the rams, and a bracelet supposed to have belonged to the goddess Law. There were also a few questions asked about n item called the Misfortune Malachite, though there were several others after those rumors so another pair hunting for it was hardly a worry.
By the time it was decided to simply dispose of the collected lists for lack of visible profit, the pair had re-boarded their airship and left the island.
“Shit.” Witch-jack managed to say in an almost deadpan tone of voice before she crashed into a hay bale sending the hay into the air like a plant based mushroom cloud.
Jynx sighed, standing up from the knee she had taken to dust herself off and look at the remains of her vest before pulling off the tatters. She had brought a change of clothes, though so had Applejack.
Jynx moved over to the pile of broken hay bales looking down at Witch-jack who was half invisible in the mess with how her fur matched the straw. “And what did you do wrong this time?”
“Over extended tryin' tah git a throw.” Witch-jack muttered pushing herself out of the pile with a grumble. All her clothing was in tatters and she wondered why she bothered with wearing it at all for these spars as she had to replace it nearly every time. She and Jynx were far more durable than anything Rarity could make.
Thankfully, or not so thankfully, Rarity had no problem replacing the pairs sparing clothes for free, though Witch-jack thought they were getting skimpier every time a new pair was presented.
Witch-jack was quite certain however that Rarity was getting a free supply of gems from the Diamond Dogs who secretly tried to watch the training sessions. That might explain why her shorts and top kept getting smaller too now that she thought about it. She'd have a word with the marshmallow nightmare later.
Rahs had been invited to one session, then quickly excused himself before they really got into the training.
Both Jynx and Witch-jack had been amused by that.
“And how do you counter that?” Jynx offered.
“Shift my weight tha other way and leg sweep.”
“Good.“ Jynx offered a claw helping the former pony out of the pile of hay. “Your mother is glaring at me again.”
“She does that.” Witch-jack sighed glancing to the side to see Pear Butter's angry face peeking out of one of the trees. “Least she keeps yer fans away.”
“I am certain those dogs are staring at you as well. “Jynx huffed. She had given up on trying to discipline those that came out to watch them, as nothing sort of killing them would keep them away, though Granny Smith, and the Macs did a pretty good job until the dogs learned not to dig their way to the training area and ruin some fields.
“Great. So am ah even getting any better at this or do you just like throwing me around?” Witch-jack muttered, brushing some hay out of her fur.
“Yes.” Jynx offered remaining silent a moment as Witch-jack glared at her before continuing. "You've already gotten to the point Rahs was at before he ascended, though since then he has been avoiding training.”
“Really? Think it's cause of this?” Witch-jack gestured to the ruins of her clothing.
Jynx smiled without showing teeth. ”Most likely, also the last time we trained his clothing was damaged as well....”
Witch-jack blinked and flattened her ears as she looked at Jynx. “Sneaky, ah gotta keep in mind ya ken be as bad as Saturnia an Sunset.”
“I am doing my best to get what I want.” Jynx offered with a wave of her hand that made certain parts of her anatomy jiggle in a way that would cause nose bleeds. “ Have you given more thought to my offer?”
“Ah have. And tah be honest ah'm pretty sure tha only reason ah ain't agreed yet is cause of all tha pony sensibilities ah've grown up with. Jus cause ah ken see that don't make it any easier.” Witch Jack sighed.
“If you wish I can sweeten the deal by allowing you to have the first pups with him.”Jynx offered.
There was a crash and a thud, as Pear Butter fell out of the tree she had been hiding in and crashed into the bushes below, she was now fighting to get out of the sticker bushes with little success.
Jynx and Witch-jack glanced her way then back at each other.
“As ah said, yer as sneaky as tha others.” Witch-jack huffed. ”Also that was a lie.”
“Of course it was. I am the Alpha of Alphas. The first of his pups would be mine.” Jynx explained. "It is the way of things."
“Diamond Dog culture is weird.” Witch-jack sighed.
[ Dragonlands]
Dragon Lord Torch rubbed his temples with a claw that could crush a city as he let out a groan of frustration.
The race was over. And out of the forty some dragons that were in it, only thirty remained as those who placed lower than thirtieth were removed for the final events.
The problem was, those that lost were all arguing about there being cheating.
Twilight Sparkle, her furry brother, and his mother were all nearby, Bleu was highly amused. Which having grown up with nearby her, worried him.
The argument was specifically, that the ponies had cheated.
The Orange one named Scootalloo had grown wings of fire and placed first as she flew rings around the fastest of the dragons competing.
One of the other fliers in the race had shot flame at her in aggravation, that was not against the rules of the race. That Scootaloo was unharmed by the fire meant very little to the one who breathed fire at her, as Twilight Sparkle had yanked the dragon out of the sky and proceeded to flatten a small mountain with him for attempting to harm Scootaloo.
The other racers got the hint.
That was thrown out as Scootaloo had not done that herself, and that the attack was for doing something that Twilight disapproved of. There was a small discussion where Twilight was asked not to interfere again, to which she replied that she would protect any ponies who needed it if she had to raze the entire volcanic cauldron to do so.
Rahs had slapped her in the back of the head and argued with her for a while before she finally apologized for her threat. The ones protesting her involvement in that aspect wisely accepted that.
Trixie was also being protested, for her success at placing 17 of 30. Not for any real reason aside from that it had devolved into a fight between her great grand father and three other dragons from the local bridge club. Mable had refused to allow Searing Basalt into the club in the past due to his interest in Ponies, and that had sparked a rather interesting conflict on it's own between the two for the last thirty years, but given Mable's daughter had been one of those cut from the race for not placing made her extra mad.
That one was an easy fix as casting spells on yourself to make yourself go faster was not against the rules, it was no ones fault but their own if the competitors didn't learn any magic that would help. Several dragons including Torch's own daughter had used spells to do so. Ember had placed 5th.
The biggest issue however was Spike. He had not so much run, or flown as he had been thrown by his sister after she layered him in spells.
He had arced through the air and landed in 21st place after bouncing across the finish line, the only reason he placed so close to the limit as he did was that Twilight had waited until the race began to begin casting, just to be fair.
Spike was unharmed at the landing though he seemed very annoyed that he didn't land in the lava cauldron like his math predicted. Evidently he forgot to carry a two or something.
Torch really should have added more turns to the course. Currently every dragon that had placed 31 and above was yelling along with a number of them that were family or friends of the losers.
“SHUT UP!” Torch bellowed at the dragons, and they all shut up. "The race placement stands as it is. There were no rules about outside interference before. NOW THERE ARE. Sparkle, you are not allowed to cast spells on Spike to help him win.”
“I understand.” The mare smiled.
The other dragons were annoyed at the rule only now coming into play , but like the first bunch they merely grumbled and accepted her word and that the Dragon Lord had made the law.
Dragon Lord Torch however was rather worried about Twilight's smile when she agreed.
“This is hardly fair.” Saturnia growled as she looked out the window of Sunset's workshop in the top of the crystal tower, staring down at the sparring Witch Wolf and Diamond Dog.
“It's not going to get any more fair if you keep harping on it.” Sunset huffed tapping on the screen of her crystal tablet, the device was hooked up to a much larger crystal system that was going to be used as a server rack as soon as she was done programming it. The communication and transfer abilities of her relay system were perfect and already in use, but the internet still needed to be built, and that was going to take longer.
“Seriously no matter how good I am with my shape shifting, that I am losing to muscles and huge teats is aggravating.” Saturnia grumbled.
“Rahs has a type.” Sunset offered, “But if that was all he was interested in we would have already lost. Plus would we really want some guy only interested in our looks?”
“Of course not. After all the research I did on the Sparkles for my mother back for that wedding fiasco he has far too many qualities that I highly approve of.”Saturnia sighed. “But.... I mean, look at them!”
“One's a goddess and the other is my cousin, so I'd rather not, besides they're probably both nude and covered in mud again.” Sunset sighed. “You would think Rarity would make clothing that was more durable..... oh that marshmallow bitch.”
“What?”
“I bet she's betting on Jynx in the Ponyville pool.”
“We need to have a word with her.” Saturnia growled.
“Nah, I just need to give her a design of something I saw in the human world to make to my measurements, then I just wear it as a human on a date with him, and you copy it in your Abyssinian form.” Sunset considered. “Applejack's still leery of working with Jynx and we've already planned to team up on the next date.”
“I still wish we didn't need to share him like that.”Saturnia sighed.
“Ehh we're both busy, he's busy, we get along pretty well and neither of us have issues with sharing because of who it would annoy, which is to say pretty much everyone.” Sunset offered. ”In a perfect world we wouldn't have to share, but there's only one of him and this isn't a rom com so the two of us aren't gonna drop him and hook up in a 4th act twist.”
Saturnia gave Sunset an apprising look which Sunset returned after thinking about it a moment.
“Nah.” Saturnia offered. “Not unless there's meat in the middle.”
“You've been hanging around Cadence too often.” Sunset smirked. ”Not that I disagree.”
“Well on the plus side, the stage mare and the fish don't seem to be teaming up.” Saturnia hummed.
“I still wouldn't discount them too easily. Aria's only having fun at the moment, but if she decides she's going to go all in, she'll have the support of three very dangerous individuals.” Sunset hummed. “ And Trixie is a bit more devious than you might think.”
“She's a mortal with a high skill in illusions and fireworks and nothing else. Just because she got his first kiss does not mean she will be getting any further if I have anything to say about it. “Saturnia huffed. “Besides while Aria can change into a human form as you can Trixie has no such thing and it has been pointed out several times Rahs is drawn to those with teats.”
“Boobs. They are called boobs when you are a biped with only two.” Sunset offered. “I suppose you are right though, she doesn't know the spell to change like Aria and I and even if she did, she doesn't have the power. I watched Luna try to train her after all.”
[Dragonlands.]
“Darkness beyond twilight....”
The dragon facing down the blue pony slowed in his attack raising one eyebrow at the mare not running and rearing back onto her back hooves, her fore hooves cupped together in front of her.
“Crimson beyond blood that flows....” Trixie continued.
“Rahs.” Twilight questioned from the large rock overlooking the fighting circle the house sized dragon and Trixie were in. They had witnessed a few other fights including Ember taking a dragon twice her size in a spectacular display of magic and acrobatics.
“Buried in the stream of time is where your power grows.”Trixie's spell started to hum ominously.
“Wuff?”
“Did Princess Luna teach Trixie the Dragon Slave?” Twilight asked.
“I pledge myself to conquer all the foes who stand.....” a bright ball of glowing energy formed between the mares hooves , her cape and hat starting to blow in a unseen breeze as motes of light gathered and started swirling into the brightening ball.
“Ruff.” Rahs nodded.
“Yes, you're right, I suppose she would have.” Twilight nodded. “Probably first thing.”
“Before the mighty gift bestowed in my unworthy hoof....”
The dragon facing Trixie looked nervously to the side as Twilight Sparkle, Equinoid weapon of mass destruction, raised a few dozen shields between herself and the match, tossed her brother in front of her, and body tackled Bleu off the back of the rock they had been sitting on.
”Let the fools who stand before me be destroyed......” Trixie practically shouted.
The green dragon Trixie was facing was sweating bullets, then he took note that Dragon Lord Torch had taken a few steps back to sink behind his volcanic throne.
“By the power you and I possess...” The ball in Trixie's hooves was three times the size it had been and there was a manic gleam in her eye.
“I FORFIT!!!” The dragon yelped and took off like a shot out of the ring to flee for the hills.
Trixie watched him go with a grin letting her illusion of the spell fade to nothing.
“Seems Trixie moves into the finals.” Trixie cheered.
Rahs rolled his eyes then turned to try and maul his sister for throwing him in front of her like that.
The fights were put on hold as all the dragons watched the two Sparkles go at it.
[ One hour, three destroyed mountains, one drained lake, sixteen craters, and two new volcanoes later.]
The purple dragon looked down at the orange pony before him.
Scootaloo stared back up at the dragon.
The dragon glanced up to the seating where the purple pony sat, with a very large grin on her face.
He looked back down to the orange pony that was just standing there.
“Nope.” The dragon stated and turned walking out of the fighting circle.
Rahs sighed and slapped his sister in the back of the head.
“WHAT!?” Twilight protested. ”I didn't even do anything.”
“Huh... and I was gonna give up before the fight started too.” Scootaloo hummed. ”Cool I can try out that last event.”
“Dragon Lord Torch.” Twilight called up to him. Torch blinked and leaned his head down.
“Did you need something?” Torch asked.
“Just a question about the rules.” Twilight asked watching as Spike squared off with a dragon twice his size. “Now I cannot cast any spells on my brother down there because he's in the tournament, right?”
“That is correct.” Torch asked watching as Spike was currently running around the edge of the circle while the other dragon tried to smash him.
“So am I allowed to cast any spells I want on my other brother, who is sitting next to me outside of the ring and not participating?” Twilight asked.
“Errr.. I suppose so....” Torch blinked thinking he was missing something, particularly as Bleu started to snicker.
“Thank you.” Twilight nodded and started rapid casting and layering Minotaur's strength, Bears endurance and Monkey's cunning repeatedly along with several armor spells and other buffs onto Rahs.
Rahs smirked.
[Crystal Empire]
“Alright you two one more big push.” Shining Armor smirked as his foals giggled.
He was sitting slightly behind them as he pushed them on the swings at the part, the pair of foals giggling and laughing as they swung with their father pushing them both with his hooves.
“Okay here we go.” Shining called to them as they both screamed out as his hooves pressed to the back of the swings and he pushed intending only to send them forward a little.
The sudden surge of power was fully unexpected, and his push sent both of them forward like a rocket launching the two foals into the air to soar across the park as the chains on the swings snapped.
He stared after for a half second as the foals screamed out in excitement as they soared through the air. He quickly surged to his hooves and tore after them at an almost blinding speed with several promises in his mind to kill his sister and brother when he got the chance, it was okay, they'd grown back.
[Dragon Lands]
Dragon Lord Torch growled lightly, the sound starting an avalanche on one of the few remaining mountains in the area.
After Twilight's questions and casting, Spike had gotten a hold of the other dragons tail and proceeded to swing him around and into the ground a few times with little to no effort before flinging him out of the ring and into a rock wall, where the dragon was now stuck.
“Huh. Looks like Spike wins. Imagine that.”
Dragon Lord Torch narrowed his eyes at the smiling Moon Dog and sighed again.
"Good then it's working." Aria nodded looking down from the branches she was coiled around in her Siren form down towards the mulberry colored mare on the ground below." TEMPEST, IS THE LIGHT GREEN?"
The unicorn below looked at the large metal box tucked into the crystal roots at the side of the tree, then nodded yelling an affirmation up to Aria. Aria tugged on the pole a little in a few directions." And you're sure you can hold this here?"
"All i have to do is reshape a few branches and it's sealed like it was in cement." Seshet sighed." I assure you I'm fine. I did the same with the cable."
"Good, this is the last upgrade too for now. Should boost the power by at least thirty percent over. Plus I added a lightning rod ground, just in case, not sure if that will mean anything with Sparkle's protections plus that you're made of crystal; but ehh..”Aria offered as she slithered down the tree, dropping back onto four hooves as she hit the ground.
“Thank you regardless.”Seshat offered her voice following Aria down.
Tempest stepped back expecting the larger siren form to come down instead Aria's pony form dropping out of the lowest branches.
“You finished then?” Tempest asked looking up at the crystal tree.
“For now, need to update some of the relay nodes, but the bugs can handle that when the pyro finishes the internet.” Aria stretched a little. ”So what's this I hear about you training the Guard here?”
“Part of my parole, most of them don't need much as Guard Captain Comet Trail was training them, but since he's still on light duty due to his injuries and threats from his wife, I've taken over the training. “Tempest offered. “They're way better than the yeti already, so it gives me a bit of a challenge.”
“Hmm... you up for a spar then?” Aria hummed. “I'm out of practice as a pony and as a Siren there's only a hand full of people who I would get anything out of a fight with.”
“Surprised you're not joining Jynx and Applejack.” Tempest pointed out.
“Yeah no. Those two are going full on grappling, and while I can do that in human form, I don't have near the power, claws, or regeneration to spar with them.” Aria shrugged. ”Besides last thing I need is a 'injury' sidelining me from my next date with Rahs.”
“Stiff competition in that one.” Tempest shuddered. “Also better you than me.”
“He's not that bad.” Aria huffed.
“You didn't get the third degree from him after you surrendered. I did.”
“Heard about that and it's a family thing. He's used to dealing with annoying siblings same as me.” Aria smirked. ”And both of us are ready to murder any one who threatens them no matter how annoying.... Sonata though..... never mind.”
“ Shouldn't you try to find someone without five others after him?” Tempest sighed watching Aria fiddle with the large metal box now at the base of Seshat.
“Meh, biggest threats are the dogs in terms of looks, Rahs is decidedly a boob dog. Good news is that Jynx is so confused by the rules she won't go all out, and Applejack's currently hung up on her family thing so neither of them are doing all they can. The bugs a bit more of a problem, though she's kinda stuck on the rules too, and the pyro's over thinking everything.” Aria offered. “The biggest problem out of them all is the show mare.”
“Trixie? Hmmmm no one else in the Ponyville pool seems to think her chances are that good.” Tempest considered.
“Unless you talk to Spike. Mare's also obsessed, and that makes her unpredictable. She'll pull every trick in the book and then invent some new ones to get what she wants. The others have dismissed her practically which means when she makes her move, no one will expect it.” Aria offered.
“NO ONE EXPECTS THE TRIXISH INQUISTION!” Discord bellowed popping up from a bush in a large red hat with Pinkie Pie in red robes next to him in an aviators hat and Sonata on the other side in red robes as well.
“Your chief weapon is surprise?” Aria deadpanned.
“And a fanatical devotion to the moon dog.” Sonata offered.
“No. I'm not dealing with more. Stop this before it becomes an actual cult.” Aria ordered.
There was silence for a moment as Tempest and Aria stared at the three. After a moment they all slid back down into the bush, and neither of the two mares needed to check to know they had run off to bother some one else.
“Hmm, I suppose that's a sound strategy, though how did you plan to counter that sort of crazed mindset?” Tempest hummed.
“No idea, you can't counter crazy unless you're willing to be worse, and out of all the ones after Rahs I'm the only one that seems to have a lick of common sense.“ Aria sighed “Best plan is to watch out for the crazy and try to steer it towards another target or get out of the way then swoop in and pick up what's left.”
“That's the common practice for dealing with the Sparkles from what I've heard.” Tempest offered.
[Dragonlands, final day of the Dragon Lord contest.]
A group of fifteen dragons including two ponies stood outside a massive towering volcano that also seemed to be on fire.
“You know, you never did say why you were entering this contest.”Scootaloo asked looking up at Ember who was standing at the starting line before the Flame-cano along with all the others who won in the fighting tourney.
Trixie who was standing on the other side of Scootaloo offered a yawn shaking her head and looking like she was trying to stay awake glanced to the filly. ”Who me?”
“Nah Ember here, you're doing this to impress Rahs and your Grandpa.” Scootaloo waved off the tired looking mare as she harrumphed and glanced to Spike on her other side as he spoke with a fair sized dragoness near him.
“My fathers rule has stagnated the dragons. We need to return to how we used to be, we were prosperous back before what the ponies call the War of Night.“ Ember huffed. “I mean look at them, half of these dragons wouldn't know a book if it beaned them in the head. Most of them have the intelligence of diamond dogs and because of that we have no place at all in the world stage. They act as if strength is all that matters and the hatchlings are barely taught anything, if they are raised by their parents at all. My grandmother sending her egg to be raised by ponies created Spike. He is the least dragon like dragon I have ever met, and yet he is here in the finals of this tourney after being better than nearly a hundred others. He is proof that making dragons smarter will make them better.”
“Ehh not quite proof, but close enough, Spike's his own thing. So you just wanna improve all the dragons way of life and stuff? I can get behind that.” Scootaloo nodded.
“Trixie agrees, improving your people is a worthy goal.” Trixie yawned.
“Well thank you, though praise means nothing if you are still competing against me.” Ember frowned.
“Ehh, I don't expect I'll get far. That curtain of lava falling down the entrance is a bit of a stop for me, fire I can handle, molten rock, no thanks.” Scootaloo offered.
“There is a path leading down to the left that will let you get past it. It's the bursts and flame geysers that are the issue.” Trixie offered.
“What?” Scootaloo asked.
“What? “ Trixie asked back seeming confused.
“Oh crap how did he get in the finals?” Ember growled as a red drake strolled up to them to growl at Spike who was talking to a female dragoness on the other side of him named Ann.
“Your cheating ain't gonna help you any more runt.” Garble snapped at Spike.
Spike blinked and raised an eyebrow at the red drake. “ Ehh whatever.” And went back to talking with Ann about the story she had told at the start of the events, one about parasitic things falling from the moon that only dragons could stop.
“Garble how did you make it this far? I wouldn't have thought you could have made it past the storytelling event.” Ember snarled.
Garble glanced her way considered for a moment and shrugged. ”I dunno after I drove off that diamond dog I had this weird dream about a friendly mushroom in a desert, a six legged bison, a flying lemur and a bear.”
“Drove off... right..” Trixie huffed.
“What like an ursa or a BugBear?” Scootaloo asked.
“Nah, just a bear.” Garble shrugged.
“Weird.” Scootaloo hummed.
“So Fuzzy beat some creativity into him?” Trixie considered. “I can completely believe that.”
“Drama dogs gotta add drama.” Scootaloo sighed. ”At least he hasn't figured out how to add drama by doing cliff hangers yet. I hate those”
“Please tell me you have my camera.”Spike demanded of Rahs.
“Wuff.” Rahs nodded and handed Spike the camera from his coat.
“Oh a camera ? I love photo shoots.” the thing offered
Shining Armor simply stared, utterly speechless.
“What hath pony kind wrought?” Twilight lamented.
Spike started snapping pictures as the thing posed for some of the pictures while every one continued to stare.
“Oh wait, let me go get my best hat.” The thing offered. “I want a few shots with it on.”
“Your hat?” Spike questioned.
“Of course.” The thing offered. “ Rainbow Dash always dresses in style.
[Equestria 8675309 ]
The Sparkles looked over the ruined and blasted landscape, the world in a perpetual twilight as neither the sun nor the moon were in the sky. There seemed no signs of advanced life, though there was some bird song and a faint drone of cicadas in the wilted and dying trees.
“Soo what are the bets this is one where Luna and Celestia took each other out?” Spike considered.
“No bets. Even if they had, some one would have regained their portfolios and kept things going.” Twilight hummed.
“Ruff.” Rahs added.
“He's got a point, if their fight killed everyone else there wouldn't be any creatures to take over the duties.” Shining added.
“No, there's still bugs, birds, and trees, though they are bit sickly something would have taken over their portfolios, the sun and moon don't have to be moved by ponies.” Twilight explained.
“So what some big evil took over? What sort of evil horror would do that?” Spike asked.
They all pondered that a moment before the brothers looked at each other.
“10 bits on a Evil Twilight.” Spike stated.
“Sucker bet, look at the sky, perpetual Twilight.” Shining gestured. “Calling card there.”
“Bork.” Rahs snickered.
“Right, it might not even be an 'evil' Twilight, it might just be one caught up rereading the Encyclopedia Equestria again and she forgot to spin the sun and moon for a few months.” Spike agreed.
“I hate all three of you.” Twilight grumbled.
[Timeline, 471233]
“YOU FOOLS DARE TO INVADE MY LANDS? HA, YOU WILL BE LITTLE MORE THAN MEALS FOR ME.COWER IN FEAR!!! FOR YOUR TIME IS....”
“Oh, it's just Tirek.” Twilight offered.
“ What?” Tirek stopped.
“Yeah I was a little worried for a second, I meant the fortifications on the castle look pretty impressive so I guess I was expecting some one who might be a problem.” Spike agreed.
“Ummm.” Tirek stated.
“Wuff. “ Rahs shrugged.
“Yeah, I guess his dramatic timing was nice, but I mean come, on it's Tirek, not an actual threat.” Spike waved his claw dismissively at the towering centaur.
“Wait a moment that's not....”Tirek protested
“What would this make, eight of them we've encountered?” Shining shrugged.
“Nine if you count the one made of yarn, that place was weird.” Twilight hummed. ”Rarity might have liked it though.”
“Yarn?” Tirek questioned.
“Well do we want to count just the hostile ones, or all of them? That one place had a good one that was female, she was also hot for Rahs though.” Spike pointed out as Rahs grumbled.
“You're being rude.” Tirek huffed.
“ Ehh whatever, nothing we haven't seen, wanna see if this place has a Hayburger?” Twilight suggested.
“Nah, maybe the next stop, if this place is as lame as it's ruler I bet the fries are soggy.” Spike offered.
Tirek blinked watching them get back onto a crystal table and vanish.
“I have soooooooooooooo many questions.” Tirek grumbled.
[Time line 1977]
Twilight raised an eyebrow at the tall figure in black armor before them.
The dark figure breathed heavily as it stared back.
Spike tilted his head wondering what the lights on his chest meant.
Shining Armor was a little worried about all the armored people in white behind him holding odd looking weapons.
Rahs was in awe, feeling the drama radiating off this guy. It was like his only goal was to be the most dramatic thing in the room at all times.
Despite there not being any wind in the hall they were in, the black cloak the figure was wearing began to flicker and whip. His thumb touched the flashlight he had in his hand, flicking the lever and forcing a long red beam like a sword to form.
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Twilight looked at it.” Nope.”
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
The beam faded out as Twilight turned the device off with her magic.
The dark figure and all the soldiers in white looked at the beam then at Twilight. He turned the beam back on.
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Twilight's horn flared.
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
The dark armored man stared at Twilight.
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Twilight stared back.
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!
Vrummmummmmm FVISH!
The other Sparkles and the white armored guards watched the pair going back and forth. Until the light saber sputtered and sparked in the mans hand, the beam not coming on. The dark helmeted man looked at the device then at Twilight and let out an inarticulate roar of rage.
Rahs snagged Twilight and the group ran back to hop on the table and vanish before they found out what this guy was gonna do now that his flashlight was broken.
[Timeline X]
Shining Armor tilted his head looking at the man sitting in the wheel chair next to him with his leg in a cast. The man, himself, Twilight, and Spike were all watching a race from inside a garage on pit row, following the cars as they went past then looking up at a TV when they went around one of the many twisty bends in the track.
The table had appeared in this place and crashed down, knocking over a number of heavy things, one of them crushing this mans leg.
Twilight's healing spell knowledge could accelerate the healing but not enough.
The brown haired man was pale with angled eyes and a stern expression, though despite that he didn't seem angry, just upset this had to happen now.
He needed to be in the race, and with a broken leg he couldn't drive. Unfortunately there wasn't enough time to bring in another driver as the race was to start in perhaps fifteen minutes. He had to drive in this the race to make sure his brother and family were safe, because if he was in the race, the enemies would be focused on him and not his brother.
Twilight's offer to make them explode was refused citing politics.
This world had made them all humans,so blending in wasn't a problem and the injured man was the only one to see the table and offered to keep it hidden in his garage if they helped. They all tried on the uniform he had,but the only one of them it fit was Rahs.
There was a very short explanation of driving and Rahs was told to just make sure he stayed in the race. If he drove erratic or slow it would just make the focus fall on him more as the enemies wondered what he a world class masked driver was doing.
About two laps in Rahs had shown he had other ideas.
The sole focus of everyone was on the Shooting Star, number 9 as it tore around the track, it dodged and weaved through the other cars, slipping through attempts to knock it off road, recovering nearly instantly from spin outs, ducking out of the way as secret tire spikes from other cars tried to take him out.
The yellow car also managed to knock a few cars out of the race that were gunning for the white car driven by the injured man's brother.
“Amazing. “ the man stared.”Are you sure he's never driven a car before?”
“Pretty sure he's never really seen the inside of a car before.” Twilight huffed.
“Bullshit drama powers is what this is.”Spike sighed glaring at the injured man. “You had to tell him that story about your brother didn't you?”
By the time the checkered flag dropped, the only two cars still on the track were driven by Rahs and the injured man's brother, though he was nearly a lap behind.
After hamming it up in the victory circle and accepting the trophy Rahs drove the car into the garage and hopped out noting his siblings were glaring at him, and the wheelchair bound man was no where to be seen.
“We need to go.” Twilight huffed as Rahs chuckled putting his coat on from where it had been in the passenger seat, tucking the trophy inside it.
A sudden shout made him stop as a young man ran into the garage and up to him.
The man yanked off his white helmet and pointed at Rahs.
“You. Racer-X. I have to know. “ Speed demanded.” Are you my lost brother Rex?!”
Rahs raised an eyebrow under his mask.
He reached up and peeled off the mask revealing the American looking features with dark blue hair that fell to his shoulders, and amber eyes.
“Sorry to disappoint you Speed.“ Rahs offered in a near monotone.”But, I'm not your brother.”
Rahs turned, walking away from the the striken young man. A wide grin plastered on his face, if he had a tail here, it would be wagging like mad at all the drama and third act twists.
"The rules are simple." Dragon Lord Torch bellowed. "The first to get the Bloodstone scepter and bring it back out to me is the next Dragon Lord."
There was a moment.
"CHEER!!!"
The dragons cheered.
"GET READY!"
"GET SET!!"
"HOLD UP TIME OUT!!" Trixie called up making Torch blink in surprise as everyone looked to the blue mare in confusion.
Trixie broke away from the line of others, ran up to Rahs, swept him off his paws, literally, dipped him, kissed him deeply, then ran back into line giggling.
This resulted in a number of eye rolls, some laughter, barfing noises from his siblings, and Rahs being embarrassed.
"ARE WE DONE? GOOD! GO!" Torch roared.
Spike lept off the edge of the pool slamming into and through the falling sheet of lava over the entrance landing hard and skidding across the simmering rock to scan the massive Flame-cano's interior for any sign of the scepter. Several other dragons burst through after him, some like Ember following his example of staying low, others flew through, though that showed to be a mistake as three of them slammed into a stalagmite hidden by the lava fall and were knocked out of the air.
Ember and several other dragons took off deeper in and Spike cursed, rushing down along side one of the lava flows shaking off the molten rock that clung to his scales.
He was starting to regret this as it was an awful lot of work for a prank.
"Hoooo shit..."Scootaloo offered looking past the lava flow having taken the path along with Trixie to get around it.
"I know right." Trixie offered as they looked around the massive interior filled with lava and random flame geysers.
"How do they expect us to get through this?" Scootaloo stared as a section of wall exploded, though it turned out that was caused by two dragons deciding to try to take each other out of the race at the same time rather than any sort of trap.
"They don't, this was made for dragons after all. Sure we could get to where the staff is, but it would take hours of putting up with the heat and dodging burns. Add in thirteen dragons trying to make sure you don't find it and it's insane."Trixie sighed. "Trixie does not plan to go in there now."
"I thought you were doing this whole thing to impress Rahs?" Scootaloo offered.
"Trixie is. Fuzzy will be greatly impressed that Trixie did not do something leathly stupid to try and win him. After all how well did that work for Snapple Crack, the bug, and the dog last time?"
"Huh. That's kinda clever. maybe I should put my bits on you in the pool."Scootaloo considered.
"Aren't you a little young to be in the Ponyville pool?" Trixie questioned.
"Oh there's a foals pool too. Firefly set that up. Lower payout cause we can only bet what small allowances we have." Scootaloo shrugged. ”We only get into the bigger pools during certain events or if our parents put our names in. That's how Sweetiebelle gets by it, and Lyra has used my name a couple of times to hide that she's bidding. I get a cut when she wins, but I think they are catching on to that.”
"Dare I ask where Trixie is in the pool?"
"Not that sort of thing. None of us get how the main pool works so we all just dump everything in a pot, say who we expect and who ever wins splits the pot. Changing your bid requires matching your first bid with another. Though we have candy and toys dumped in the pot too and it's all being kept by Firefly and his cut is some candy any time you place a bid so no one really minds." Scootaloo offered. "I've not bid yet, but the most popular one in the pool so far is Jynx."
"Because of course she is." Trixie frowned hearing a dragon scream from some where in the Flame-cano. She expected they probably found the magma spiders, or the spiders found them.
"Well she is the one most of us see interact with him next to Applejack. You and Saturnia are on the bottom of the list cause some of the kids remember the bear incident, and no one ever really sees Saturnia. Though there's a different pool for her, given she's some how escaped a welcome to Ponyville party thus far."
"Trixie is annoyed, but at the same time impressed at the bugs skills at avoiding the pink menace." Trixie huffed. "Trixie would also like to point out the bear was the fault of the two idiot colts."
"I know that, you know that, but the two 'idiot colts' are doing their best to make sure everyone one else thinks it was your fault."Scootaloo offered. "Granted I will say Snips has lost a LOT of weight being on the Black List for the last few years. He's still short though."
"Pinkie Pie is very thorough it seems." Trixie nodded before pondering. “How does one get in on the pot for when Pinkie catches Saturnia?”
Ember cursed to herself as she glided over a gap, it was probably bad form to trick the obsidian bear to go after the larger dragon that had been nearby, though if that green scaled bitch hadn't attacked her first she might not have.
Right now she was certain she was closing in on the staff, there was a series of tunnels criss crossing around the outer walls that lead into a major pillar in the center. It was something that only the smaller dragons could use to get further. She wasn't sure if that was set up by her father or her grandmother. The latter seemed to want a much younger dragon to take over, or at least one clever enough to control her greed growth.
Ember had learned how her grandmother did her size change thing early on, though she had not amassed enough of a hoard to reach much bigger than she was now for the simple fact she preferred things other than treasure, and growing up was conditioned to not think of anything but gems and such to be a hoard.
Still, once she was Dragon Lord she was going to take the time to track down whoever had written Wolf of the Harvest Moon and ask them for an autograph.
Twilight raised an eyebrow as Scootaloo and Trixie walked back out of the Flame-cano.
“After that display of yours, I'm surprised you gave up.” Bleu offered.
“I know my limits.” Scootaloo shrugged.
“Trixie has had enough lava spiders for today thank you very much.” Trixie added.
“Well they lasted longer than I expected.” Torch declared with a nod. “Top ten at least.”
“Well putting those stalagmites just on the other side of the lava curtain was a dick move.” Bleu offered. ”Those things took out six of the competitors right off. And you knew two of them were scared of spiders when you filled the lower cavern with the damn things.”
Torch smiled.
“There it is!” “There it is!”
Spike and Ember whipped their heads around to glare at each other as they came out of the tunnels.
Ember was holding one of her wings close to her back as and encounter with a cinder worm in the tunnels had smashed her against a wall injuring it.
Spike had more black scales than purple as evidently there was an ash beast somewhere judging by the smell of the soot on him.
The chamber they had entered was a large lava bubble that had hardened into a dome with a number of tunnels running out of it from old cooled lava tubes, a large basalt chunk in the center of the chamber had the scepter sitting on it.
The pair glared at each other, their eyes narrowing before they both rushed the stone where the scepter was only to screech to a halt as a red clawed hand snatched it up in front of them.
“I GOT IT!” Garble shouted doing a little dance on top of the rock. “I'm the Dragon Lord!”
“You have to get it back to Dragon Lord Torch first.” Spike snapped.
“Not sure how you plan on doing that as I've kicked your tail up and down these mountains for years.” Ember growled a bit of electricity dancing along her bared teeth.
“You've seen what my siblings can do... I'm known to WIN fights with them.” Spike offered as he cracked his knuckles.
Garble blinked looking at them before frowning. ”Yeah, yeah, whatever, I bet you only win cause..... WHAT THE SHARDS IS THAT!?”
Garble yelped taking a step back, Ember and Spike quickly looked behind them to find... a rock wall.
The two stared a moment before they slowly turned their heads back to where the scepter had been only to see that Garble had buggered off with it.
“I am never going to live down that I fell for that.” Spike offered in full on deadpan.
“If we kill him, no one will ever know.” Ember replied just as deadpan.
The pair of them nodded and launched themselves after the red drake.
Rahs perked up his ears as he heard screaming coming from the cave mouth, the pitch of it was enough for him to flatten his ears. It didn't sound like Spike. The Moon Dog blinked perking his ears back up as he did hear Spike, and the drake was swearing at someone. There was also a female voice that was coming up with even more impressive swears that were thankfully mostly drown out by who ever was screaming.
Rahs looked down at Trixie who was acting rather odd to be honest. The mare hadn't even really tried to go into the Flame-cano, she had mostly stuck around Scootaloo near the entrance. While he was quite happy that she hadn't risked herself like that, it seemed a bit out of character for her. Her grandfather also seemed to be fairly calm where he lounged, though he was evidently in an argument with two female dragons, one he expected was Mable from the bridge club.
Rahs didn't want to think about massive dragons playing bridge, he also didn't want to think that if the game was the same as ponies played or involved actual bridges.
The screaming grew loud enough that the others could hear it now and everyone's attention focused on the falling lava in front of the Flame-cano's entrance just as a red drake burst through it flinging lava everywhere.
The lava had barely had time to fall over the hole he made in it with his exit before Ember and Spike exploded out of it with clear murder in their eyes as the red drake ran from them straight towards Torch.
Rahs frowned, it looked like he had the scepter. Not like that was gonna stop Rahs from planting him in a rock again if he tried anything stupid. If that made the new Dragon Lord mad enough to try to invade, well good luck getting into the Oneiroi.
The pair finally tackled Garble just before he reached Torch, the trio slamming to the ground and tumbling to bounce off one of Torch's claws hissing and biting and letting loose with flame and lightning.
As the dust settled, it seemed Garble had held onto the staff despite Spike and Ember's best efforts.
Rahs was almost impressed by that given how the pair of them had twisted the drake nearly into a pretzel shape.
"I've got the Blood Stone Scepter, I'm the new Dragon Lord." Garble wheezed out.
"Off of him." Torch ordered glaring at Spike and Ember, both of whom reluctantly drew back, glaring at the red dragon.
Garble winced and started to untangle himself standing to his feet and raising the scepter in the air.
"See I've got the Blood Stone Scepter." Garble insisted holding up the scepter.
"Where?" Torch questioned.
"Right here....." Garble looked at the scepter in his claw. The half melted scepter with the words, 'Made in West Taiwan' etched onto the handle.
"What?!?" Garble gasped looking it over and reading the other words on it." What the heck is a Sailor Moon limited edition?"
"I thought that looked familiar... Ember grumbled getting a look from Spike.
"Wait a tick, that was the one on the pedestal, where's the real Scepter?" Spike demanded looking back at the Flame-cano, not sure if going back in there was worth the prank at all now.
"Were you looking for this?"
The entire crowd whipped their attention to Trixie, who pulled off her hat and drew the Bloodstone Scepter from inside of it to wave around.
"THE FUCK!?!" Twilight, Ember, Spike, and a good portion of the crowd demanded.
"Trixie has informed you at least once before that her talent is spectacle, and you cannot tell me that this has not been that!" Trixie grinned.
"Oh yeah. I'm putting my bid on her." Scootaloo nodded sagely.
Trixie trotted over offering the scepter to Torch who looked at the mare and narrowed his eyes.
"You did not even go into the Flame-cano, how did you get this!?"
"The rule you gave said we would be doing this today. Trixie does not recall a time ever being given for when we would be going into that death trap, so Trixie snuck in about midnight last night when all the monsters were asleep and retrieved it." Trixie explained. "Thus Trixie also completed the challenge of being clever as no one caught Trixie cheating, and she had to explain it."
"I knew i liked this one for some reason." Bleu cackled.
"SUCK IT MABLE!! MY GRANDDAUGHTERS THE DRAGON LORD!!!" Trixie's great grandfather shouted.
"Huh..... a pony with dragon blood." Torch considered. " Ehh whatever, I've got a beach cabana rented and I'm tired of waiting. Boom, You're Dragon Lord have fun. What are you called?"
"The Great and Powerful Dragon Lord Trixie, shall do." Trixie proclaimed
"Right. " Torch nodded. "MEET YOUR NEW DRAGON LORD. THE GREAT AND POWERFUL DRAGON LORD TRIXIE SHALL DO!!"
"Wait, no, not that last part...." Trixie called up to him.
"Well. That was a thing." Spike sighed. Most of the dragons were still around, some having some sort of a party, Searing Basalt was still taunting Mable and her bridge club, though most of the other dragons had wandered off not really caring one way or another.
"So. Trixie is now Dragon Lord and thus in charge of all dragons correct?" Trixie asked Bleu. "Can you use the spell you used on Trixie back at the deal with the Storm King please?"
"You're not in charge of dragon gods." Bleu frowned.
"This is why Trixie asked and said please as well." Trixie placated.
Bleu continued to stare at the mare before she shrugged. ”Not like I was gonna use that spell on anyone any way.”
“Wait, you're going to use the companion spell on Trixie?” Twilight demanded.
“Problem?” Bleu asked with a stupid looking grin.
“No but..... well, this wasn't what I designed it for.” Twilight huffed as Bleu worked on casting the spell.
“Yeah well, dragons live a long time and I can't think of anyone I've ever dated I want to be around forever with me. Besides, this has the possibility of being very amusing.”
“Seriously?” Spike asked.
“Yeah seriously, Look. Dragons were the first race on Equss, we had the first god, I was born before ponies had formed tribes and were still feral plains creatures. There's only been two dragon gods before me. I'm one of the the oldest non primordial gods around. So excuse me if I get my entertainment where I can.” Bleu rolled her eyes finishing the spell.
Rahs blinked and looked over as Trixie had the spell cast on her. He had heard she had done this before from Applejack, but he hadn't managed to see her before she was changed back.
His eyes widened as the spell ended and Trixie stood there on her back legs, bipedal now. She still had her lower hooves, though her legs were digigrade, her front hooves more like Spike's claws and her head was still mostly pony shaped with a forked horn emerging from her forehead like a kirin's. Her head had spines along her jaw and she had a long draconic tail that ended in a tuft of white hair like the long tresses falling down her head to the base of said tail.
Rahs was also greatly distracted by the scaled underbelly she had and how it worked over her rather large breasts, which were about eye level with him as she was as tall as Jynx now. She was also completely nude and still kept some mammalian features that were not talked about in polite company. He barely noticed she had wings, but he could be forgiven for that given the way she shifted and wiggled looking herself over.
“Hmm, Trixie will need to ask Rarity for a new wardrobe.” Trixie offered before noting Rahs staring at her. She blushed deeply her face turning purple as she quickly cast a spell covering herself in the illusion of clothing befitting a stage magician, though her cloak and hat seemed fine ,if ill fitting over her new horn.
“Woof.” Rahs muttered getting a glare from his siblings.
Trixie looked herself over, checking the illusion. “There we are, much better.”
“I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!!”
The group turned and looked at the massive black dragon with huge curling horns storming up to them. Torch and Bleu sighed as the father of one of the contestants stormed up.
“I will not allow a pony to be the Dragon Lord!” the dragon roared pointing a claw at Trixie. ”Even with the Dragon god's spell, that thing is an abomination to dragon kind.”
“Rude.” Trixie huffed.
“If you don't like it then you can challenge her to the position, the same as I have allowed before.” Torch shrugged. “I care not who is Dragon Lord at this point. My time is over for it.”
“Meh.” Bleu shrugged looking at Trixie. ”If you're gonna be Dragon Lord girly, expect this sort of crap.”
“Seriously.. she just got the title. While I don't like it.....”Twilight muttered standing up along with Rahs.
“Sparkles please seat yourself. Trixie will deal with this.” Trixie stated waving off Twilight who snorted.
“Your funeral.” Twilight sighed looking up at the massive dragon looming over the mare. Rahs hesitated though he offered the dragon a glare before stepping back.
“Are you the only one who has issue with The Great and Powerful Dragon Lord Trixie?” Trixie demanded as everyone backed up making a large clear area like had been in the fighting tourney portion of the Gauntlet.
The black dragon looked behind him at a group of others who were shrugging though more than a few of them nodded. “There are.”
“Good, Trixie will only accept one challenge per year and only on this date, that is her first decry. If you win you can keep or drop the rule though it likely will only favor you to keep it.” Trixie offered.
“So then what is your name? Trixie needs to know what to put on your tombstone.” The show mare tilted her head looking up at him as she rested her claws on her hips.
“Charcoal, and there won't be enough of you left to bury!!” The dragon roared and slammed his claw down onto the spot Trixie was.
The illusion of Trixie huffed looking up at him from where it was sticking out through his claw. “Is that your best shot?”
“Coward!” Charcoal snarled.
“Please. You are four times my size easy, Trixie would have to be stupid to take you on claw to hoof or claw... well whatever, no one wants a stupid Dragon Lord.”
“Show yourself!” Charcoal snarled breathing flame across the area turning the ground to molten rock before him.
“Hmm alright.” Trixie offered appearing in the air by his nose her wings flapping lazily. ”I suppose it's Trixie's turn. Darkness beyond twilight...”
The dragons claw lashed through the flying Trixie hitting nothing but air. Another Trixie appeared her claws starting to glow all three of the illusions moving through the same motions.
“Crimson beyond blood that flows....”
“I'm not scared of that spell mare, your illusions mean nothing to me!” Charcoal snarled sweeping the next illusion along with a large portion of the ground with his tail.
“Buried in the stream of time is where your power grows. I pledge myself to conquer all the foes who stand.....”
The dragon roared smashing another illusion ripping apart the ground as he tried to figure out where Trixie was.
“Before the mighty gift bestowed in my unworthy claw...”
Every time Charcoal smashed an illusion a new one popped up and the one smashed continued on as if the dragon had done nothing.
“Let the fools who stand before me be destroyed...”.
This lead to a number of illusions getting smashed more than once, and due to the savagery dozens of Trixie's were around Charcoal going through the movements and words of the spell, all with a proper glow, both in the air and the ground.
“By the power you and I possess...” Trixie finished as the dragon roared and set everything around him on fire again.
“DRAGON SLAVE!!”
The beam launched from all the Trixie's claws at once, though Rahs and Twilight's attention snapped to one of the Trixie's in the front that had been hit at least twice with the fire breath and had no noticeable marks due to it.
The massive blast lit up the area and there was an explosion as the top of the Flame-Cano was evaporated by the blast.
All the dragons stared at the the remains of the Flame-cano, then back to Charcoal who was staring wide eyed at the real Trixie standing before him the side of his head chard a little and one of his massive horns completely gone.
“Darn. Trixie missed.” The draconian mare grinned showing her fangs.” Ready for round two? Trixie hasn't tried that 'Burst rando' thing Princess Luna has taught her yet.”
“Nope.” Charcoal stated and took off into the air flying away as fast as he could, wobbling a little to the left due to the missing weight of his horn.
“Well now that that is over” Trixie huffed as Bleu cackled. ”You Blue one!”
Trixie shouted out an pointed at Ember.
“What?” Ember demanded.
“That's 'What The Great and Powerful Dragon Lord Trixie?”
“I'm not saying all that.” Ember grumbled.
“Whatever. Eat this.” Trixie reached into her hat pulling out a sapphire and tossed it to Ember.
“A gem?” Ember regarded it before shrugging and eating it. After a few moments she winced coughed and spit out a gout of green fire.
“Was that a messenger gem?” Twilight demanded.” When did you learn THAT spell!?”
“Wuff.” Rahs added pointing at Spike.
“Yeah I taught it to her so she could keep up with Rahs through me, but she never managed it before.” Spike shrugged
“It tastes like pine cones.” Ember coughed.
“Yes, you are now linked to Trixie. Trixie put that together last night after recovering the scepter. Of which here.” Trixie tossed the scepter to Ember as well.
“Wait you're giving up being a Dragon Lord?” Torch questioned. ”Shortest reign ever.”
“Trixie is not. Trixie just has other things to do and can't be hanging around here all the time beating down idiots, there wouldn't be anyone left. So Trixie is appointing that one her regent to run things in her stead while Trixie is busy. If you need anything you can contact Trixie with that spell, Trixie figures being led by an actual dragon might calm some of the issues here, not to mention some of your ideas are worth merit. Trixie allows you to implement them as you see fit.”
Ember blinked.
“What else do you have to do that you're letting me run things?” Ember frowned.
“Trixie has to win Fuzzy after all.” Trixie offered before rushing over and grabbing Rahs hugging him to her chest as she giggled madly.
“You could do that?” Torch questioned looking down at his mother who was cackling like a loon.
Rahs however found out several things, one, Trixie was a lot stronger than she looked, two Trixie was only wearing an illusion of clothing, and three her scales were still pretty soft.
“Congratulations.” Trixie offered to Ember, before she turned back to the other dragons with a glare still crushing Rahs to her chest.
“CHEER!” Trixie bellowed in the Royal Canterlot Voice.
The dragons cheered.
“Let my brother breath you crazy mare” Twilight huffed.
[3 days after Trixie became the Dragon Lord, Ponyville, Fall]
"Ants... her prank gave us ants...." Twilight growled, her ears twitching.
"Bork." Rahs sighed back shoveling another pile of the mess into the back of the cart that had been wheeled into Seshat for the clean up.
"I know that wasn't the goal, but it's what happened. Ugh, gone for a week and we have to deal with this when we come back." Twilight ranted. "Seshat why did you let Celestia do this."
"I am not part of this stupid prank war of yours. And I made sure Celestia knew that. As such she didn't change anything of mine, and all of your things are in storage in a place that I will tell you once you finish cleaning."Seshat huffed.
"Why did you let the ants in?" Twilight demanded.
"I'm a tree. Why do I care about ants running around, termites on the other branch."Seshat shuddered the floor shaking with the movement.
"I did not know you could do that." Twilight frowned looking at the floor.
"LESS TALKING AND MORE WORKING!" Spike bellowed stomping down the stairs with a large box. He reached in pulling out what looked to be a well painted minature of a battle mamoth, save there was a bite taken out of it showing it was strawberry cake."She used so much fondant to make every detail perfect, if it wasn't for the ants we wouldn't have noticed everything was freaking cake until we tried to use something."
"Fondant, truely she is an evil mare."
"Every book, model, peice of non integrated furnature, all our food, even the garbage is all cake...." Twilight grumbled. "Did no one notice this stuff?"
"Tempest, Grubber, and Starlight have both been staying over in the Guard Barraks. "Seshat offered," but that was only after Grubber ate everything that had been in his room. Peewee followed Tempest, Owlowcious has been camped out side waiting for mice to comeafter the cake, and Blakenly has burrowed though half of Rahs' bed at this point. Also i've seen Tiberious around too, and by around I mean a ROUND, that thing has gotten fat. Oh, you also have a guest."
“Really? Who?” Twilight asked. “ Can we get them to help?”
“Siblings.” a cold voice growled from the doorway. The three local Sparkles whipped their heads around at the tone to see Shining Armor standing there.”Why did I get a sudden strength boost that launched my foals into near orbit?”
“THEY DID IT” Twilight, Spike , and Rahs all shouted at the same time while pointing to the others.
“TRAITORS!” All three then yelled at each other before taking off in a random directions as Shining Armor screamed out and gave chase.
“Don't break anything!” Seshat demanded.
Manehatten.
“I told you it would not be that bad.” Sombra offered as Rarity sighed looking around her newest shop.
“Sombra... You destroyed the club making the noise, sicked the family of racoons on the mobsters, hired the two employees you couldn't intimidate into running away, and rebuilt the entire shop into something more apropriate for a blacksmith shop.” Rarity frowned. “How is this not bad? I never should have left you unsupervised.”
“Your shop is set up with time to spare and it is decorated with a simple undertone that is easy to add to or alter, the club was a hole and violated at least six building codes, the raccoons are gone, and the landlord was only probably a mobster. Though he did violate your signed agreement with his demands” Sombra huffed.”I will be reporting him and his 'deals' to the local Guard to deal with. Also no one was hurt in the club and that vampire mare thought the explosions were a 'cool effect'.”
“This is not how things are supposed to be done.” Rarity growled.
“Please. If we had done things your way this probably would have been a thirty minute friendship lesson or some other such nonsense.” Sombra growled back.”I simply did what you asked and got the store ready in time.”
“And threatening the employees?!” Rarity snapped.
“If they couldn't deal with me, they would not have stood up to the basic customers in this town.” Sombra pointed out. ”That I did not do things the way 'you' would have done them does not mean that my way did not work.”
“And the Raccoons mauling the landlord?”
“That was just funny.”
Sombra blinked as a roll of fabric bounced off his head, thrown by Rarity.
Sombra narrowed his eyes as he looked down at the roll then back up to Rarity. ”And what was that for?”
“That..... “ Rarity huffed.” That was for biteing Fluttershy....”
[Ponyville]
“WHAT the FUCK!?!” Sunset screamed out gesturing with a hoof.
Saturnia simply stared.
Aria tilted her her looking over the issue.
Applejack sighed.
Jynx was a little leery that she was seeing someone else at eye level.
Trixie simply smirked.
“WHO the fuck!?!” Sunset exclaimed.
“Ah see yah got Bleu to cast that spell again.” Applejack sighed.
“Trixie did indeed.”
“WHEN the FUCK!?!” Sunset demanded.
“Trixie is now Dragon Lord.” Trixie offered. “While this removes any certenty of Trixie winning for being the underdog, Rainbow Dash of all ponies pointed out that thatwas not a sure bet at this point in time any way.”
“Stars.... I need a cup or eight of coffee, I cannot deal with this sober.” Saturnia grumbled.
“HOW the FUCK!?!” Sunset eliquently put.
“At least she's a traveling mare so we don't have to deal with her that much.” Aria shrugged.
“No Trixie is pauseing her tour to maintain a presence here in Ponyville now.”Trixie offered fanning her wings a little, the effect making her scaled breasts jiggle and forced Jynx to growl glancing down at her own as if to compare sizes.
“WHERE the FUCK!?” Sunset continued.
“Ahh Trixie spoke with the Mayor and it seems there is a open spot in the Golden Oaks library along with a postion of town librarian given Twilight has vacated the location.”Trixie smiled.
“And sometimes, WHY the FUCK!?” Sunset concluded.
Trixie smiled.”Trixie knows you lot have written her off in the quest for Fuzzy. Trixie refuses to admidt defeat and suggests you get on her level.”
“Pass. I don't think my spine could take having boobs that big.” Aria countered.” Better hope Rahs is attracted to lower back pain with you lot.”
[Canterlot]
“So is that everything?” Luna asked.
“Yup, not sure why Shiny wanted to come to Ponyville for a few days, but it does give me time to finish cleaning out the Love Lab and bring everything up to the Empire.”Cadence offered. “Chryssy is watching the foals for a few days and I think I have all the boxes packed up. What did you plan to do with this place?”
“Provided we can keep or sister out, we were thinking some sort of game room.” Luna considered.
“OOOOO.”
“Not your sort of games neice.”
“Oh...”
“What are you going to do with all these boards?” Luna asked looking at the three or four boards covered in string with Rahs' name at the center and various scores, several bite marks were taken out of the corners.
“I'm not sure yet. I mean this is pretty good data, but it's kinda hard to update. The points without keeping a closer look on Ponyville and I can't come down here too often.”
“You also have Lulumoon in the bottom of the scoreing.”Luna frowned.
“Auntie, you are pretty much the only one with a bet on Trixie in this, I mean both Spike and Mrs Sparkle support her, but that's not enough really as they can't make bets at this level.... What?”
Cadence trailed off at the sight of a small blue dragon sitting on the table eating a box of thin mints.
“Hey these are pretty good.” Bleu hummed.
“Those had best not be mine.” Luna growled.
“Nah stole them from sunbutt.” Bleu offered.
“Ahh, carry on.” Luna nodded.
“Bleu, why are you here? How did you even get in?” Cadence demanded.
“Secret tunnel.” Bleu offered.
“Secret tunnel?” Cadence blinked.
“Secret Tunnel” Bleu agreed.
“Through the mountain.” Luna explained.
“Why does everyone but me know about that thing!?”Cadence huffed.
“That explains the how, but not the why Bleu.” Luna pointed out.
“Oh right.” Bleu offered “Heard about your thing here.”
Bleu explained before geturing to the other side of the table she sat on, and the large bag of what looked like gems and some currencies from places other than Equestria.The tiny dragon slapped the side of the bag with a claw.
“Put me down for Dragon Lord Trixie to win the mutt.”
“What!?” Luna questioned.
Cadence stared at the little dragon.”I'm sorry did you say 'Dragon Lord' Trixie?”
“Yep, she won the contest and I boosted her with the companion thing. Huge teats or whatever they are called on her now. Heard the dog likes those. At least he wasn't complaining when she burried his face in them.... repeatedly. Seriously that had to be intentional with those hugs.”
Cadence slowly turned to look over the boards.
“Lowest on points, hmm?” Luna asked.
Cadence screamed out in rage and blasted the boards apart.
“DAMN IT DD!!!” Saturnia screamed out as the massive lizard monster, Cipactli, surged through the mud after them. “Can I not have one date without you screwing it up!?”
“I didn't tell you to come along with me!” Daring Do shouted back at the changeling currently in a rather expensive looking red dress that clung tightly to her Abyssinian form showing off a good bit of leg and cleavage.
“NO, you just invited me to the damn convention!” Saturnia snarled back ducking a ball of mud.” And then happen to have stolen a mystic key despite KNOWING you were going to be surrounded by civilians!”
“This is very realistic.” Quibble Pants grumbled, the stallion only having gotten involved in this after he was foal napped with Rainbow Dash during an argument over the Daring Doo books.
“This is AWESOME!!” Rainbow Dash shouted, quite certain she had won the argument with Quibble.
“Oh I agree..” Prince grinned, having gotten Rainbow Dash to dress up as Daring Doo from book six, Daring Do and the Spice Smuggling Space Slug. ”Much better than that Daring Doo 'Vacasperience' or whatever they were calling it. That was boringly safe.”
“I have mud in places that there should not be mud.... please may I burn him.” Sunset snarled darting along with the others in very nice and clingy dress that matched Saturnia's though she was wearing it in her human form with her hair up and hers was black.
Rarity had loved how the red and black dresses played off the pair.
“Can you even burn anything in human form? I thought you had magic issues like this?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“I've been practicing.” Sunset offered.
“Bork.” Rahs rolled his eyes at Sunset running behind the others he was dressed in a nice white tux that he thought he looked good in. He had also thought this was just a date with Saturnia, only for Sunset to show up as well with both of them cooperating in trying to woo him. His only complaint about that was that his suit's pants were waaaay too tight to deal with both of them at once when they got like this.
“That wasn't a no....” Sunset commented.
“Yes it was!” Daring Do called back.” And Cipactli is a god, one of rain, mud and crocodiles, be glad its in this form and not the one with a mouth on every joint, that shit gets wild.”
“How the heck do you know what he said?” Sunset snapped at her, wincing as a chomp of the lizards teeth cut her hair tie letting her orange and red hair spill free. The beast got a punch in the nose from her for that.
Rahs frowned.
“Nunya.” Daring asked dipping under a claw and galloped towards a slowly closing door as the beast roared behind the group rubbing it's nose.
“What?” Quibble asked.
“As in Nunya Business. ”Daring snapped back diving through the door and quickly whipped around to try and prop it open for the others to rush through. All of them made it save Rahs who slid to a stop as the door slammed shut with a final thud. There was a loud roar and the sounds of violence from the other side of the thick stone door.
“RAHS!” Saturnia, Sunset, Prince, and Rainbow all shouted out.
“Oh that's it. I'm fucking everything up now. EVERYTHING BURNS!” Sunset snarled.”Saturnia, the door please.”
Before the changeling could do anything the closed door started to crack and suddenly shattered, showering the others with bits of rock and mud. The lizard monster's head following the collapse, it's head fully through the hole though the expression on it's face seemed like it was in a panic now, not angrily trying to kill them.
“Help.” The beast whimpered as it was dragged back through the ruined door and the sounds of more violence sounded.
Peering through the group were treated to Rahs wearing his Lucador mask doing a series of rolling pile drivers, slamming Cipactli into the ground over and over again, the mud that was filling the temple due to the beast was now mostly splattered along the walls. With one last massive roar Rahs buried Cipactli into the ground leaving the monster with it's head embedded into the stone floor. Rahs stood up, took off his mask tucking it into the tux jacket he was wearing, he adjusted the blue tie he wore, brushed off his sleeve and strode towards the group with not a single drop of mud on his white tux or himself.
Saturnia and Sunset stared through the hole along with the rest of the group.
“How in Equss does he do that?” Quibble questioned.
“He's a Sparkle.” Prince sighed. “The real question is, why didn't he do it sooner?”
“Drama.” Rainbow Dash pointed out.
“Of course.” Prince sighed.
“Sunset.” Saturnia offered.
“Yeah?” Sunset asked.
“Make a really big hole out of this temple.”Saturnia offered.
“Okay... but why?” Sunset asked. “I mean I'm more than happy to, but, why now?”
“Simple, he may not be covered in mud, but we are, and I'm sure we can convince him to help clean us up.”
Rahs' eyes went wide at that, and the predatory smiles on his dates faces.
“That is not a bad idea.” Prince hummed as Rainbow Dash squeaked.
“I'm too young for this.” Daring groaned sticking her tongue out.
“You're the oldest one here you hag!” Saturnia snapped. ”Sunset!”
“I'M FIRING MAI LAZOR!!” Sunset cackled as the air around her ignited.
“So I'm just saying, sure Caballeron pays well, but how hard is it to get a dental plan?” A green maned and brown coated stallion asked.
“Fairly expensive from what I've heard.” A gray furred and white maned stallion standing next to him offered.
The pair of them were dressed like they stepped out of a old detective noir book and their manner of speech labeled them both as clearly from Manehatten, though their long coats hid their cutie marks.
“Yeah, but he makes how much from every trip we take? And who does the heavy work, we do, who plays guard duty afterward, and who are the first to get their teeth kicked in by Lara Crop or Daring Doo or Arizona Joe or whatever that guys name is?"
"You're not telling me anything I don't know already." Mook One offered back.
"You know I hear Ahuizotl offers a dental plan." Mook Two hummed to himself. These were the pairs actual names, they did not have creative mothers.
"Really? I thought he just used cats and cultists?" Mook One questioned.
"Nah, he does, but you remember Thug Three?"
"Oh yeah, girl made the best Gumbo. How's she doing?"
"She's retired, has a kid on the way. She married Grunt Six after the Tesla Job." Mook Two explained.
"Oooh I remember that job, real shocking stuff there. Good on her though. Hope she gives the foal a more imaginative name than what our parents came up with."
"She's planning for Iceberry Lilly if it's a filly and Paintbrush Lilly if it's a colt." Mook Two agreed." But any way not the point, her husband did a stint with Ahuizotl and while the guy didn't pay as much as some others he did have a medical and dental plan set up, not to mention retirement benefits. He even held a party for Grunt Six on his last day, wished him well and let him know he'd be welcomed back if he couldn't find anything else."
"See now that is a good boss. Might have to look into that next time Ahuizotl is hiring, not sure if I can pull off a grass skirt though." Mook One hummed. "Still. Gotta be more interesting than just standing around and stopping any one from leaving the temple through this door."
"Yeah, but, ehh this pays pretty well to just stand around and talk." Mook Two commented.
"Yeah." Mook One agreed.
Then a beam of fire evaporated the ground in a massive hole before them the sun blotted out with the brightness and the heat curled their hair.
The pair blinked and remained unmoving as their nose hairs shriveled from the heatwave.
A small group of arguing ponies climbed out of the hole, most of them covered with baked on mud save a blue diamond dog thing in a white tux, he was covered in two of the others and only seemed slightly perturbed about it..
A orange haired long pig and a Abyssinian had latched onto the dog and were dragging him off, though the long pig was cackling madly and the Abyssinian was giving a griffonesse salute to one of the ponies that wore a hat.
A white unicorn strode off with a blue pegasus on his back, the mare looking like she was trying to curl into herself with embarrassment with how red her face was.
The last two of them looked a bit like Daring Doo and a gender swapped Daring Doo were arguing with each other as they strode off after the other pair.
"Huh." Mook Two commented.
"Yup." Mook One agreed.
"That was a very big pillar of flame." Mook Two stated flatly.
"Yup." Mook One agreed again.
"Well not our problem as they didn't come out this very specific door we were told to guard." Mook Two concluded.
"Yup." Mook One agreed with final certainty.
[Ponyville, newly opened Pony Joes]
“So. You're the dragon lord now?” Starlight asked.
“Yes, though it's said with capitol letters, like this, 'The Dragon Lord.” Trixie offered.
“Not gonna ask how I heard it with capitalization.” Tempest muttered taking a sip of her coffee and prodding at the chocolate glazed doughnut before her, she was going to have to bust her flank to work off the other three she had already eaten, did she want to risk a fourth?
Yes.
Yes, she did.
“So how is that working out for you anyway?” Starlight asked poking at her curler. Tempest glared at the mare, she had eaten six of those things and Tempest knew her diet was trash but the unicorn mare didn't ever gain weight. If Starlight wasn't Tempest's friend she'd strangle her on principle.
“Not that bad really, Ember is doing quite well keeping the dragons in line in my name and I've only had one message sent by her which was to inform me of what she was doing, not ask if she could do it, just that she was. But then again I pretty much told her to do what was needed and keep me informed.” Trixie explained. “There are down sides to this though."
"What like learning to fly?" Tempest asked.
"No, I picked that up fairly well as I used several variations of flight in my shows. No what Trixie is annoyed with is she is having issue sleeping with a tail and wings comfortable. And that's not even mentioning trying to get comfortable with these over sized teats."
"And yet..." Starlight smirked catching on that Trixie sometimes just complained to do so.
"And yet everything else outweighs this by a long shot." Trixie continued. "Trixie is very much needing to adjust for her new power level. There are so many spells I could never cast before that I can now, not to mention my illusions are now beyond any scope I could have ever hoped to achieve. I'm not sure but I think I can actually cast things globally.”
“What seriously?” Tempest asked.
“Indeed. I can't for long, but evidently my connection to Bleu has tapped a bit into her 'Winds' portfolio and if there's a place with wind, I can do something there.”
“That does sound global. Having dealt with airships as much as I have once you hit a certain height there is always some sort of wind.” Tempest explained. “ How did you even figure this out?”
“Trixie was fiddling with things and Sunset's crystal thingy got a message from the Empire about something weird in the sky. Turns out Trixie was making abstract shapes over the empire and several other places she has been.” Trixie sighed. “Ember sent a note from Bleu telling me to stop causing panic. Though Ember pointed out her grandmother was laughing her fool tail off as she said that.”
“Still that's impressive that you can do things globally. “ Starlight offered glancing at the ruby encrusted doughnut Trixie was eating.
“It is a new limit. Trixie expects she can form things with her illusions any where on Equss, but not for very long before she gets exhausted.” Trixie pointed out. "It is rather hard to test too."
“You're getting nervous.” Tempest offered. ”You're back to third pony again.”
“What.. right sorry? Tri... I am trying, but if I get worked up it is far too easy to slip on the mask. Training with Princess Luna did not help that.” Trixie sighed.” I need to get better control of it for Fuzzy.”
Tempest and Starlight shuddered at the name. That the monster Sparkle was called such a cute name by someone they were friends with weirded them both out something fierce. Particularly because otherwise they liked Trixie. They just thought her taste in males was lacking.
"So how is that going with him any way?" Tempest asked knowing that if Trixie focused too much on Rahs, things would get weirdly uncomfortable for them but going for it anyway to distract herself from wanting another doughnut.
"I honestly do not know. As much as I do my best to boast that Tri... I am winning the contest for his heart, I am not sure I am. I may have finally got it into his head that I am not JUST his friend with the Dragon Lord set up, but I do not know if it is too little too late or not."
"Sunset and Saturnia are double teaming him on a date today." Starlight hummed to herself getting a glare from both of the others.
"Do not say it like that." Trixie grumbled.
"That's not what I meant." Starlight stammered.
Trixie smiled showing a great many pointed teeth before downing the ruby encrusted doughnut in a bite chewing it for a few moments before swallowing." I know... It's just. Apple Lack and the mutt have teamed up, the bug and the pyro have teamed up and the fish isn't looking to team up with any one, so Trixie does not have any one she can rely on for this. I mean even Spike is mad at Trixie for the whole Dragon Lord thing."
Trixie gestured with a claw to the purple dragon standing at the counter staring at Pony Joe.
"So .... an earth pony huh?" Spike questioned.
"All my life." Pony Joe offered looking a bit nervous at the dragons glare. It wasn't as bad as a cockatrice or Fluttershy, but if a dragon wanted to let you know it was glaring at you, you knew.
"And there just happens to be a Unicorn Pony Joe in Canterlot, a Pegasus Pony Joe in Cloudsdale, a Kirin Pony Joe in Lion Heart, and a Human Pony Joe in the human world, not to mention a Cybertrionion one, a Chiss one, a mouse one that set up in a place called Redwall, a ghost one, a Klingon one, a Geth one, a Elf one, drow, wood, and high, three dwarven ones, a rock troll one that the Captain Carrot guy said had always been in the city, a Thri'Krin one, and Arilou Lalila one, six Borg ones, a Bothan, though I think he died, a tree, and a sentient doughnut Joe that served glazed ponies."
"I know some of those words." Pony Joe offered.
"I'm onto you Joe." Spike growled as Applebloom grabbed him by the tail and drug him out of the store with the bag of doughnuts he just bought.
The two unicorns looked at each other as if they came up with the same idea.
"Errr we could help if you need it." Tempest offered.
"I mean, what are friends for if not to help another friend hook up with a terror that wakes me up screaming at night?" Starlight grimaced.
"I am less afraid of Ursas..." Tempest muttered.
"Seriously? You two want to help." Trixie blinked, then smiled, one with slightly less teeth, not that her toothy grin really bothered the other mares, they had nightmares about worse. "Well given both of you live in the same place as he does, I most certainly won't argue with your insight, not to mention I'm sure you two have loads of advice you can give as well given all your travels. It certainly beats trying to ask Rarity, and Sombra's only advice was to' knock out a few of his teeth and it will to work out', whatever that means. Though it made Rarity titter, so there's some meaning there."
“I don't even try to understand those two. And the marriage pool for them has gotten insane.” Starlight sighed. “I'm pretty sure this town has a very severe gambling problem.”
“According to The Mayor it didn't used to be this bad. It was really just the weather team, but since Twilight showed up there's just far too much 'to' bet on.” Tempest offered.
“Still that sounds great. I won't turn away any help I can get with this. Fuzzy is far too important to leave to a Bug that just wants to eat him, a mutt that only wants to breed, a mare who's confused by her form and a couple of royal brats who are just looking for a fling.” Trixie huffed letting out a long sigh.” For now Trixie wants another doughnut though.”
The two mares watched as the half dragon rose and walked over to the counter to order again. The pair spared a glance to each other before leaning closer and whispering.
“Please tell me you have some experience in this sort of thing.” Starlight half hissed.
“I spent my whole life trying to fix my horn and around yetis and those willing to stab each other in the back the second you look weak, what makes you think I've had a moment to even think about dating or anything like that?” Tempest offered back. ”What about you , you ran a whole town with guys in it under your control..”
“They were followers, not puppets and using them like that would have been an abuse of my status. Beyond that the only guy I was close with I last saw when we were six, and currently he's already married to a mare that I expect in the right circumstances could beat all four of the Sparkles at once, so I am not even gonna try to talk to him without permission.”
“ We are in so much shit.” Tempest sighed as Trixie came back with another doughnut and began to outline her plan to beat the others to Fuzzy's heart.
[Three days after Sunset and Saturnia's date with Rahs]
Twilight, Rahs Fluttershy and Applejack stand in the map room looking down at the map table. The latter two's cutiemarks glowing lightly.
“Tha map is pointing where?” Applejack frowned.
“Las-pegasus.” Seshat offered. “Something is going on there.”
“Oh dear.” Fluttershy frowned.
“Wuff.” Rahs pointed out.
“He's right Fluttershy, Las Pegasus can't be parties and excitement and crowds all the time.” Twilight offered. I'm sure it will be fine.”
“Umm it's not that Twilight, I'm dating Pinkie after all it's... it's just that...” Fluttershy frowned further. “Pinkie and I might still have some outstanding warrants from the last time we were there.”
The others stared at the pegasus who tried to hide behind her mane at the scrutiny.
[ Las Pegasus]
Rahs frowned his ears flattening to his head. The streets of this place were packed, wall to wall ponies and other creatures , some of them even he couldn't identify. All of them milling about, all of them loud.
And given that Fluttershy was currently huddled against his back under his coat they were also scary.
Or that she had seen the Guard patrol pass.
Applejack seemed annoyed with the place as well though that was probably due to her sensibilities being affronted. The city was showy, loud, bright and full of ponies who spent bits like water and gambled away what they probably shouldn't. It was nearly all casinos, hucksters, buskers and pricey hotels. Granted there were also a lot of shows in town too, some of them he was interested in. That Shirley was here in town with his small theater troop was just a bonus if he could manage to find out where and go see how his friend was doing when they were done.
The oddity in this case was that Jynx had come along too. She wasn't quite with the group, but the gems needed for the lights and other things in this place were mined locally just outside the city with a fair sized Diamond Dog warren that Jynx was going to pop into to make sure that they were doing things properly, IE HER way.
Rahs would be more concerned with that if Jynx's way hadn't elevated the Diamond Dogs from warmongering brutes to something approaching a proper civilization in just a few years. He wasn't fond of the fact that she often had to force the packs she came upon to change by literal force, but it was something he had learned to accept, and in a deep part of his mind he enjoyed the idea of some unknown pack suffering her wraith. A glance down to the scars on his arm were enough to remind him why he didn't have as much issue as he should with her methods.
Jynx left on her own and the three of them remaining wandered about the city looking to see what there was to see. Fluttershy was removed from his coat, with some force, and was convinced to walk on her own, though she still put on a pair of Pinkie's Groucho glasses.
The trio paused before a hotel as a barker ranted before the ornate structure.
“And make sure to experience our signature show, Pone Fantastique! Trust me when I say you've never seen anything like it! Unparalleled acrobatics! Unique animal antics! Your only regret will be that you didn't see it sooner! And like everything at this amazing, incredible, I-can't-believe-it-even-exists hotel, Pone Fantastique is brought to you by the chair pony of kindness Gladmane himself! “
“Chair pony of kindness?” Applejack tilted her head.
“Ruff.” Rahs shrugged.
“I know how does one even get that sort of title?” Fluttershy muttered her eyes narrowing behind the glasses at the comment about the animal show. In her experience the animals in those tended to be sub par and she made a note to herself to check this place out a little more thoroughly .
“Well, uh, it is a little embarrassing, but the crowds seem to like it. Uh-huh-huh.”
The trio turned to look at the burly purple stallion in a suit, that likely cost as much as a years take from Sweet Apple Acres, and a perfectly styled white mane.
Rarity would have loved him.
Sombra probably would have punched him.
Rahs oddly felt some where in the middle of that.
“Mr. Gladmane?” Applejack guess glancing to one of the fliers with the manes picture on it.
“Just Gladmane'll do. And it's a pleasure to meet actual cohorts of the Princess of Friendship! Thank you for coming. Thank you very much.” Gladmane offered.
“Wuff ?” Rahs questioned.
“Hmmm?” Gladmane looked up at the moon dog.
“He wants tah know how yah know who we are.” Applejack asked.
“I'm what you might call a friendship connoisseur, so naturally I'm familiar with the friends, and brother of the great Twilight Sparkle! Applejack, Fluttershy, Rahs, it's an honor to have you here. Uh-huh-huh.”
“You saw nothing.” Fluttershy muttered looking around in a bit of a panic in case a Guard might have heard.
“I have to admit you're not the type of pony I expected to find in Las Pegasus.” Applejack offered.
"Well, my guests may be looking for lights, music, and parties, but working hard and making friends is how I turned this hotel into what it is today, and how I plan to make it even bigger. Uh-huh-huh! Uh, excuse me for a second." the stallion offered moving to the side.
Rahs flattened his ears as the loudspeaker kicked on before he leaned closer to Applejack.
"Bork?" Rahs questioned.
"Maybe... Ah'm gitting some funny vibes from him. Like he ain't lying, but he ain't telling tha truth either. " Applejack considered. " Ah spect this might be our issue tah fix."
"He does seem popular." Fluttershy added in as the gathered crowd started chattering excitedly at the deal offered. The trio watched as Gladmane trotted back up.
"Would you three like to take a tour of the place? I'm just about to do my rounds and check on my friends who work here.
"Well that would be lovely... to get some where with fewer gua... scrut... less crowd." Fluttershy offered.
"Lead the way, Mr. Gladmane!"Applejack shrugged as Rahs nodded.
"Just Gladmane now, you hear? "
[?]
"For fucks sake." Adagio cursed shifting on the stool she was on. She was in her human form working on trying to fix her hair. Their shopping trips had them bouncing all over the place on a small airship and the tiny quarters on the ship was not helping particularly with how much the wind fucked with her mane when she wasn't in the tiny room.
Luckily Squall didn't sleep, nor did he bother with the room often preferring to stay on the airship deck or down in the engine room. The craft was small but it was fast, unfortunately that meant they had to make a number of roundabout trips when the hold filled up with the supplies they were sent for. Luckily most of those were small things, but sometimes a rare regent was bought in bulk and they had to go back to drop it off at the lab before they could go after something else.
The list was quite long after all.
"What are you bitching about?" Squall muttered opening the door and ducking to get into the small room."I could hear you over the wind out there."
Adagio just huffed continuing to try and fix her hair.
"Oh course, your mane." Squall rolled his eyes, the glowing red orbs some how conveying the effect despite them being solid red.
"Like you would know what that is like." Adagio snapped." With hair that short you're practically bald."
"My hair curls when it gets longer and starts going into my ears. I hate that." Squall muttered running his hand through the short cropped fur on his head. He let out a grumble and strode towards the mare crossing the room in two steps. One clawed hand scooping a handful of her hair.
"What the fuck are you doing?!?!?!" Adagio snarls only for a hand to rest on her head forcing her to turn back to the small mirror.
"Stop moving. You know damn well I'm enscrolled not to do any harm to you and I'm sick of your bitching." The yeti snapped his fingers working deftly as he started working the mass of hair into a series of long braids. "If you are going to keep your hair long , keep it braided, easier to deal with in the wind and it changes how you look in case any one recognizes your hair. And since you refuse to cut it this is the next best thing."
Adagio stared at him through the mirrors reflection. She took one of the braids he made in her fingers blinking in surprise at it. "How..."
"I have twenty four younger sisters." Squall huffed. "My father was a promiscuous bastard and has had quite a few children. The ones left are the ones that he didn't have killed for some slight or because he didn't want to deal with them. When I came of age they became my problem, several have been married off to farer flung tribes to keep them out of his way and to unite the yeti a bit more.”
"That doesn't explain..."
"Twenty four sisters, mare. If you think I managed to keep them in line without learning to do hair and fur you clearly didn't have your own sisters to deal with.” Squall grumbled.
Adagio flinched at that and Squall stopped his braiding a moment thinking he pulled a hair too hard though he quickly continued. The pair remained silent as Squall worked and the airship continued to the next port, and the next item on the list.
"... I'm telling you, this is the weirdest thing." The stallion offered waving a hoof. The chartreuse furred earth pony stallion grumbled, shaking his head, his curly orange mane pulled back into a bushy looking ponytail.
Rahs tilted his head his ears perking up and flicking around a bit. The stallion sitting with him nodded as he watched the guard cant, though the blue and red plaid patterned mare with the neon green mane and tail looked between them confused.
"Yeah. I mean Bay and Ginger have been working together for years. I thought they were going to start dating, they were so close. But to have them suddenly at each others throats like this is strange. What's worse they drug Beatrix and Sam into the argument and that only leaves Vespid and me to be the mediators." Shirley offered gesturing to the eye wateringly patterned mare.
Rahs had found Shirley and his troop easily enough and after a bit of a greeting and a short catch up on how things were going, Shirley pointed out how his acting troop wasn't doing much more than arguing as of late.
This was supposed to have been a bit of a relaxing tour for Shirley away from the usual roles he was doing in all the new Crystal Cast movies coming out, and up until this stop it had been. The troop he was with which he had named the Chartreuse Circus consisted of other actors and stage techs he had befriended over the years. Some of them were unknowns and others had a bit of fame, though not to the level of Shirley.
Of the ten members of the troupe four of the actors were fighting over something, the four stage hooves were doing their best to stay out of the arguments though they were drawn in more often than not as small pranks started to happen. That left Shirley and Vespid as mediators, which didn't help much as Vespid wasn't very good at mediating when emotions were high, it made her feel ill to deal with all that anger, and made it harder to focus on not blinding people with her forms as the colorblind changeling couldn't focus on more muted colors.
Rahs had realized that this was probably the event that needed to be fixed that the others had been sent here to deal with.
"The good news however is Gladmane is perfectly fine with hosting us here until we get this settled. I really don't want to be traveling in cramped wagons when this lot is fighting like this." Vespid added in.
"Yeah but he is taking a bigger cut of the profits to house us. So it's not exactly free." Shirley offered. "Still just to make the offer was nice of him, and his cut is still under what we'd be paying for room and board in a place like this."
Rahs hummed to himself at that, he needed to have a word with Applejack and Fluttershy.
"Well they seem rather happy." Fluttershy smiled as the prairie dog chittered and chirped at her. "I've never seen a pink prairie dog before."
" Glad you approve miss." the trainer swallowed. " I do my best not to strain them in their show or treat them roughly."
Fluttershy had come in like a hurricane to where the animals were being kept and any time any one protested her examination of the animals habitat and training, the glare she gave them made them back down very quickly.
That the mare had flared bat wings and shown very pronounced fangs that had scared all of them save the animals who she had quite a few conversations with.
Thankfully the only trainers she had seemed to have an issue with was a pair of stage magicians that used white lions. She tore into them quite heavily and the Germane accented performers were left in tears as she spoke of all they had failed in with their lions.
That said lions were now paying a lot more attention to the mare and three of them were following her around the room like bodyguards made everyone even more nervous.
No one was willing to ask who she was at this point, they only hoped she would go away soon.
Applejack raised an eyebrow as the two brothers continued to shout at each other.
Applejack was torn about this particular revelation. After all Seshat might have sent them here to deal with this very thing. Twilight had theorized that even the small things that were problems might blow up into something bigger and much worse. Thus far with only a few exceptions everything had pretty much just been a friendship level problem. Sure there were bigger issues that others had been to, and the whole thing with Starlight was just nuts. Still watching the two brothers argue she wasn't sure she wanted to fix this one. After all the pair of them had tried to have them all trampled by Nox-Cal the last time she had seen them.
"So what's their deal?" Applejack asked Gladmane who was still giving her the tour despite the others having split off for their own things.
"Ahh these two are under contract and to be fair are quite good at their advertising and general management skills." Glademane offered. "Not sure what the arguing is about , but i bet those two would be running this place if they could ever cooperate. Uh- huh-huh."
"Hmm, well ain't no help fer it. What was tha next part yah were so excited tah show me?"
"Ah yes we have a lovely botanical garden here with a large variety of fresh fruit and vegetables. I have quite a few on staff to tend it but i would love to see what a farmer of your caliber thinks of it."
"Sure. Lead on."
[Later]
"So what do you think?" Applejack asked as the group relaxed at an outdoor restaurant.
"I can't believe they were trying to get the lions to live on a vegetarian diet." Fluttershy huffed.
Rahs turned and glared at the yellow pegasus.
"Shy... yah tried tah git me and Rahs on a vegetarian diet." Applejack frowned.
"Yes but both of you have other things you can eat that would cover all the nutritional needs, true carnivores do not have that option, at best you two are just meat heavy omnivores."Fluttershy offered." The lions don't have that option."
"Fair enough." Applejack shrugged not wanting to get into this argument again. She also had no desire to give up bacon now that she had discovered it.
"Wuff." Rahs pointed out.
"Yeah it's pretty obvious who the culprit in all this is. All these fights breaking out between performers and staff, just so happen to make their work just sub par enough that they can't get a promotion or a letter of recommendation to another place, thus keeping them here working under Gladmane longer. And because he's so nice to all of them , not a one is willing tah hear any one speak bad of him. This has got tah be what we were sent here tah deal with." Applejack hummed.
"So he's a con-pony that is pitting everyone else against each other to keep them all in his pocket. "Fluttershy hums." How do we counter that?"
"Ruff." Rahs suggested.
"Nah, ah bet he has some heavy insurance fer acts of gods or the like that'll set him for life if yah just burn tha place down." Applejack considered.
"Wuf?"
"Ugh. Do we have to?" Applejack grumbled.
"Well they are con-ponies and with what you said he told you about them he's actually afraid of them working together against him." Fluttershy hummed.
"Yeah , but those two?" Applejack sighed."Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine, lets go have a word with that brothers."
[Hours later]
Jynx had no idea what in Tartarus was going on. She had been having words with the head of the pack here in Las Pegasus, surprisingly that wasn't an analogy for beating the stupid out of them. Not to say there wasn't any stupid, but the leader was an older dog who had gotten used to the ponies ways and had carved out a nitch in society that he was sticking with surprisingly well.
Brick had already heard about her and agreed with what she wanted provided nothing else really changed for his pack. Given he was already friendly with the ponies and some of the pups were already going to a pony school here Jynx didn't see a need to flip anything on it's head, and she made sure that the other younger dogs who wanted to lead and change things knew Brick had her support, and then a few of the more vocally opposed ones got to find out what her support meant when they wound up half buried face first in a rock.
That was all as expected. What was not expected was for Applejack and Rahs to bring her in on something that neither of them seemed thrilled with. Applejack didn't like the lying and Rahs thought the idea wasn't well thought out enough.
A pair of con ponies had convinced them to go along with some plan but they needed an uber wealthy type and they couldn't use Fluttershy like the pair wanted for glaringly obvious reasons, the least of which was she was still being followed around by a pride of lions.
So Jynx allowed herself to be dolled up and play the part of some rich socialite, something which was weird because most Diamond Dogs would wonder if socialite was a type of canned food.
The only reason Jynx was going along with this was because she took note of Rahs pretending not to stare at her in the fancy dress she wore.
She had no idea what the ploy was, evidently they wanted to try and get her to convince the stallion with the greasy mane to give up some secret by convincing him that she was going to buy large swathes of land in Las Pegasus to build her own resort. She went through a tour, met a number of interesting ponies and learned some of the inner workings of a casino. The pair that smelled like snake oil didn't want her to speak and had Fluttershy, 'translate' her grumbling which was insulting to both of them, but she stuck out the plan.
Of course then it all tumbled down when it was clear the greasy pony saw through the stupid plot.
“...Honestly yah put a diamond dog in a dress an expect me to believe she's an heiress, would have done better to use a pig or something, that's more believable. Uh- huh-huh ”
Jynx raised an eyebrow at that, noting Rahs tense with his ears flattening and Applejack bare her teeth a little. She moved her hands holding them up before the pair who both looked to her questioningly, particularly as she smiled.
Time to see if what Rarity taught her worked here.
“The only problem with that statement Mister Gladmane is that unlike a pig, I actually AM a wealthy heiress, one who has tripled the money that my father left me when he died.“ Jynx stated. ”While my funds are still being adjusted into pony bits rather than the gems Diamond Dogs prefer to use as currency, I currently own fifteen functioning mines and I am the major shareholder in nearly fifty more, one of the mines that is in my name in fact is the Royal Crystal mine of the Crystal empire, due to the need for technology based crystals that come from it, it makes more than any other mine in my portfolio. “
Everyone in the room stared at her save Applejack who knew some of this already.
“As such Mister Gladmane I was content to go along with this ruse as I was asked politely to do so by those whose opinions I actually care about. And I was content to play the part and be done with it. Now you have insulted me and my entire race with one sentence, in my face at that. “Jynx growled. “Therefore you are now my enemy. By the end of today I will have purchased every free strip of land around your casino to build my own. I will offer higher pay rates than you to all your employees, I will have a grander building built to overshadow yours using my peoples best architects, and before you laughingly joke that it will be a hole in the ground I will point out that the crystal palace has been rebuilt TWICE by my people, working with crystal is easy. I have money to burn as they say and shall not spare any expense to ruin you. In the end, once built I can wait centuries for it to turn a profit and for your casino to fall, which I give a week after my casino is running. I will buy this place from your successor or the bank when you fail ensuring you see not a single bit, and I will tear it down turn it to rubble and ensure that no one ever remembers the name of it or you. While you may scoff about the intelligence of my race, you certainly cannot deny two things, that we are violent, and we are vengeful. An old proverb of my race is that when you seek revenge to dig two graves, because your target might have an accomplice.”
Everyone continued to stare at her in shock though Jynx quickly pointed at the two brothers.
“You two, I will need a manager and it has been suggested that you are good at that sort of thing. I will double the pay of what you make here for you to set up what I want. No cutting corners, or cheating me. I will find out if you do and I will already have two graves dug.” Jynx stated, the brothers nodded heavily before her attention turned back to Gladmane whose mouth was moving like a fish but no sound came out. “ I do not know nor do I care what sort of Friendship mission this was or what they were supposed to do. I only care that you are destroyed for that insult Mister Gladmane, goodbye.”
Jynx glared down at Gladmane again before turning and walking off, the others following in her wake, with Rahs walking backwards offering Gladmane a double Griffonese gesture.
Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow as she looked over at Rahs, who was spread out on the couch with a large bag of ice in his lap.
"I know I rushed back here to see what the table wanted from the Academy, but what the hay is up with your brother?" Dash questioned glancing back at Twilight then to Spike nearby who was pouring over a bunch of game books spread out on a table.
"Evidently on that last table mission Applejack and Jynx decided they were going to take him out on the town while in Las Pegasus." Twilight sighed. "They then decided they were going to take him a bit further and nearly broke him. Fluttershy said they had drug him off and she came right back to Ponyville. She also asked me to ask you if you know any one who wants a pride of white lions."
"Really AJ and Jynx?" Dash whistled ignoring the animal question. Tank was enough for her.
"Yup." Twilight sighed.
"And he's still alive?" Dash questioned.
"Barely." Rahs whimpered.
"Pinkie called it death by snu snu." Twilight added.
Rainbow Dash considered as the pair of them walked into the map room leaving Rahs to his likely broken hips, and Spike to his game prep, the dragon not even having noticed that they walked past.
"If those two have teamed up on him I need to change my bet." Rainbow Dash nodded.
"I was already betting on Applejack, but if it's a team up I only get half. Why, who did you have bits on?" Twilight asked.
"Sunset. Great as I think AJ is, i didn't think she had the same drive as Sunset does to claim him." Rainbow Dash nodded.” Guess I was wrong, and teaming up with Jynx too...”
"I thought you bet on Saturnia." Twilight hummed looking over the map table.
"I change it up occasionally. Mostly to see who's copying me thinking I have any extra insight to the betting pool being friends with you guys." Dash shrugged.
"Fair enough, lets see where we are going..... Oh..." Twilight frowned.
"What is it something bad?"
"Not bad per-say.. but we're being called to the Wonderbolt Academy." Twilight explained.
"I just came from there!" Dash protested.
[Canterlot, 7am ]
Celestia yawned as she slipped out of bed with a low grumble, her hooves clicking on the floor as she ignored the gold slippers. She stretched out with a yawn, her wings fanning out wide as she cricked her neck. Say what you will about winter, the fact she got to sleep in more, and call it a day sooner made it her favorite season, it wasn't like the cold bothered her anyway.
Still with spring coming she needed to start raising the sun earlier, she already felt Luna lower the moon, the shift of the astrological bodies a better wake up call than a dozen alarm clocks. It was also strongly agreed by both of them that they wouldn't abuse this as a way to mess with each other.
They mostly abided by that rule.
Still Celestia didn't have anything going on until nine, so she could take it a bit easier, maybe get a nice bath before having to go out and deal with other people.
Still groggy, Celestia followed her instinct more than her eyes making her way to the door out to the balcony she raised the sun from, her magic pulling open the door allowing the sharp snap of a cold wind to blow in, her hooves switched from clicking on stone to thudding into accumulated snow that had fallen in the night.
She shivered letting out a soft murr at the cold wind that woke her up a bit more. She raised her head horn glowing as she felt for the sun, reaching her magic out to take hold of it , and opened her eyes to watch the sun rise.
She opened her eyes fully to find she was nose to nose with a grinning Twilight Sparkle.
A grinning Twilight sparkle hundreds of feet across, dusted with snow, and carved out of solid granite that was staring unblinkingly into her bedroom from the balcony with eyes larger than the bedroom itself.
The sun shot up rather quickly that morning and many were woken by the shriek of the Solar Princess.
A short time later with the sun in the sky the entirety of Canterlot and much of the surrounding country side that could see the Maneterhorn from this facing were able to view the towering statures of Twilight , Rahs , and Spike all arrayed around Canterlot Castle and poised. Twilight's statue took up most of the main courtyard and was staring into Celestia's window with a large grin, her nose right at the level of the balcony. Rahs' statue was hunched over the main throne room and his wide fang filled maw was just over the top of the main entrance to the castle like a cat ready to eat some one. Spike's statue took up the eastern courtyard and was poised , fanged maw wide, like he was about to take a bit out of Luna's tower.
Princess Celestia stared at the monolithic statues and frowned.
"Our revenge shall be swift and merciless." Celestia cackled.
Dungeons and Discords, and Dragons, and Daggers, and Diners, and Death Traps, and Dives, and Dice, and.... Prologue
Dungeons and Discords, and Dragons, and Daggers, and Diners, and Death Traps, and Dives, and Dice, and.... Prologue
[Seshat, three weeks after Winter Wrap up. Spring]
"Alright, glad everyone could make it." Spike offered as he opened the front door to greet the Crusaders.
The three fillies, plus Firefly stared at Spike.
“What? Is there something on my face?” Spike asked.
The drake was no longer purple and green, his scales were pure white with his spines having a multi colored arch like a sunrise.
Spike blinked.
The Crusaders blinked back.
Spike sighed.
"Princess Celestia changed all the soap, shampoo, dish soap, and laundry detergent in the house to change the colors of what it's used on. We have Celestia colored dishes, Celestia colored clothes, a Celestia colored Twilight, Starlight, Rahs, and myself." Spike sighed. "Tempest lucked out as she's been staying over in the Guard barracks and Celestia didn't hit them."
"Ooooooooh." the four of them nodded before trotting in.
“Wait I thought the prank war wasn't supposed to hit any one else?” Scootaloo asked.
“ It isn't but Starlight has been stealing Rahs' shampoo because she claimed it worked better for her mane. Rahs knew and was just going to leave a bottle with hair remover in it, but Celestia got to it first.” Spike explained.
"Was a little worried it was somethin in the air." Applebloom offered.
"Not yet, but ignore Twilight and Rahs they are already plotting and I've tossed out a few ideas but I'm focused on the game tonight. Luna's sadly got to miss this session, but we've got Starlight joining us as well as Discord and Sonata. So expect it to be weird."
"Isn't that gonna cause a issue with where we were?" Sweetiebelle asked setting her bag next to her seat at the large wooden table with a bunch of paper maps on it, Seshat had yet to let Spike use the map table. "We were about to start that big fight and Big Sis is our heaviest hitter."
"Nah I thought about that. The main campaigns gonna be put on pause for the night. With three new players and no Luna we're gonna roll up new characters and start with that Last Fantasy setting I was sent a while ago."
"Ain't that the one yah were complaining was a munchkins dream game setting with how much fan stuff was shoe horned in?" Applebloom asked.
"Yup. Discord 'and' Sonata." Spiked added.
"Fair 'nuff" Applebloom shrugged.
"What about the big pile of books Orbsah sent you for their new edition?" Firefly asked.
Spike frowned. "I sent them back."
"Really?" Scootaloo questioned, "Wasn't there a bunch of minis in the box too?"
"Yup. But I'm not doing anything made by Orbsah any time soon. That new policy they tried to implement has pissed me, and a lot of other people off." Spike growled.
"What policy?" Scootaloo blinked.
Applebloom, Firefly, and Sweetiebelle sighed.
Spike walked over to the other side of the room, picked up a large box with 'soap' printed on the side and walked back to set it down before hopping up on it.
"Okay years ago when O&O was getting popular, Orbsah made a license, that allowed any one to make content for their game, for free, this allowed them to have their core game and get other people to make content for their game. Smaller developers made money off supplements and adventure modules, Orbsah made money as everyone needed their books to play any of these add ons even if they didn't make money from them. So after a while it became popular and some groups like the Trailfinder system came about with games similar, but not exactly like Orbsah's system using the license as a base. All was well and good until the Crystal Empire showed up and I introduced them to gaming. So Orbsah sees this huge new market to exploit and decides that they want to cut everyone else out, so they brought up the idea of updating the original license. And they planned to do so in a way that meant that they had full say of what any one could and could not print for their system, thus taking out all the little developers and putting a hurt on any of the bigger ones that used the license. This is bad enough. But they also added in a clause that anything and the clause means ANYTHING developed using their game system was theirs to use as they saw fit. Any home brew creations, any campaigns, any characters that they found out about using their system were theirs to do with as they saw fit. So say they found out about my troll campaign a, if they liked it , they could legally have just claimed it as theirs without changing anything and then sold it without my getting anything out of it. Given Sunset's system is in it's infancy a lot of GMs , myself included, use a monthly group newsletter to pass info back and forth and tell stories about adventures and share ideas between cons. The idea was started in the old 'Dwarf' Magazine, and even though that's no longer in print after Orbsah bought it, the newsletter is reviewed by Orbsah still. Which means anything any one has ever sent in to be published would be their property too.”
"Sooooo greed." Scootaloo nodded.
"Yep and it's why I've been slowly switching us over to the Trailfinder system. And why I sent all those books and minis back, they were trying to bribe me, because all I have to do is say the word and most of the empire would switch to whatever I'm playing. I've been trying to stay out of it and hope they do the right thing, and cause I don't want to limit any one from enjoying whatever they want no matter who makes it. But if they implement the policy, a week later and I'll make sure all of the Crystal Empire knows I play their competitors system."
"Is that why you stopped collecting Battle Mallet?" Sweetiebelle asked.
"No I stopped collecting those because the models have gotten cheaper in make and more expensive in price. Look at that nonsense with the new tank they released, it doesn't even have a bottom, it looks like a bit store toy." Spike started to rant as Applebloom pushed him off the soap box before he could get started again.
“Enough, we got a game tah set up.” Applebloom huffed.
Dungeons and Discords, and Dragons, and Daggers, and Diners, and Death Traps, and Dives, and Dice, and.... Part 1
Dungeons and Discords, and Dragons, and Daggers, and Diners, and Death Traps, and Dives, and Dice, and.... Part 1
[Ponyville, Seshat]
“Okay,” the still Celestia colored Spike asked. “ I want a name a race, and a class, plus a short background for the character. More than Scootaloo's usual grunt for cash and less than Firefly's 8 page novella.”
“Sorry.” Firefly muttered.
“Don't be, I gave it to Twilight to read, expect notes.”
“You are an evil GM.” Firefly huffed.
“Damn right. Okay first up. Scootaloo, whatcha got?”
“Alright I snagged this weird monkey tailed race called Genome and went fighter with a building towards the Solider prestige class.” Scootaloo explained.
“A fighter... wow such surprise.” Applebloom dead panned.
“Stuff it. I've got dex as a main stat” Scootaloo huffed.
“ A speedy fighter, very original.” Sweetiebelle added.
“Aaaaaannnnny way. I went with the exotic weapon Keyblade cause those things look awesome and the stats plus the ease of the upgrades make it cool. Figure I'll use a buffalo name, Little Tail.“
“Background?” Spike asked jotting down notes.
“Memory loss, raised by a normal farming community.” Scootaloo explained.” Currently looking for why I've got an affinity for keyblades when they are such rare weapons.”
“Did you help her with that?” Spike asked Firefly.
“ I pointed out the keyblades cause she wanted something that stands out.” Firefly shrugged.
“Fair enough.” Spike nodded.
“Again with the easy mode Scoots. Yah know Spike's gonna abuse that open ended stuff.” Sweetiebelle sighed as Scootaloo shrugged.
“Bloom?” Spike asked.
“Shino, Gunner class. Went with onea those froggy little Tonberry guys, gonna focus on technology and sniping with a rife. Still debating on going engineer later or not.” Applebloom offered. “Backgrounds wandering mercenary looking for work trying tah git intah a hunters guild.”
“Alright, Sonata”
“ Murder Hobo.”
“Ah fuck....” Firefly hissed. “Another one.”
“Hey!” Scootaloo protested.
“I also went tonberry, but I went rogue and gonna go towards assassin, backgrounds, a destroyed homeland sent him wandering in search of revenge, and he's gonna use his thought talky language to only talk in emojis!”
“How is that gonna work?” Firefly asked.
“Like this!” Sonata stated and help up a piece of paper with a 😐 on it.” It's a Milton face!”
“Well that should be interesting.” Spike shrugged. “Firefly?”
“Went healer. White mage specifically. Burmecian race.” Firefly asked.
“The rat people?” Sweetiebelle asked.
“They consider that a racial slur Sweetiebelle, but yeah it played into my background. The Burmecian are an honorable warrior bent race. My guys tired of patching them back together after they do stupid things so he left their homeland. I plan to branch into alchemy and maybe take a class or two of chemist. Probably he developed a drinking problem due to stress.”
“Cool, name?”
“Riekland Draken.”
“After the paints?”Spike questioned.
“After the paints.” Firefly agreed.
“Okay, Discord?” Spike asked.
“Shade, a Dark Knight.” Discord offered.
“Wait you're going edge lord?” Scootaloo blinked.
“Of course not, Shade is a harmless cinnamon bun, who just happens to be a ghost or three inhabiting a suit of power armor with a big sword.”
“Interesting. And a striker instead of a tank with that class. Background?” Spike asked.
“Same as the fire chicken there. No memory, raised by a retired Shinra scientist.” Discord explained.
“I have gotten really good at throwing dice and pencils at those that annoy me Discord.” Scootaloo growled.
“Please.. like that's a thre... OW!” Discord yelped as a pencil bounced off his nose and spun back to be caught by Scootaloo again.
“Stop it... the games not even started yet.” Spike chided. “ Starlight?”
“I'm still figuring these rules out, but thus far I think I'm going to go with this Galka race I think that's how it's pronounced. Name is Temusion, I'm thinking going Druid as I do like some of the class skills, umm not sure on a background I guess wandering?” Starlight offered.
“Fair enough, it's your first game after all.” Spike nodded. “Okay, Sweetiebelle?”
“Dave.”
“Oh stars.” Scootaloo groaned.
“What?” Spike asked.
“She's been talking bout this one a bit.” Applebloom offered.
“Dave's a hume medic, with a strong focus towards Cybernetics.” Sweetiebelle explained.
“Good always need more healers.” Spike nodded. “Background?”
“Needs money to pay for the anime levels of food he eats and wants to open a restaurant.” Sweetiebelle exclaimed.” Max focus on the cooking skill!”
Discord leaned a little closer to Spike to whisper. “I was gonna use my magic to do a virtual game world for us to play in, but if that risks her cooking, forget it.”
“Good call.” Spike nodded. “Right last chance to adjust, anyone? Good. Everyone, you all are responding to an ad you found offering work in the fallen city of Midgar. The job is to be a delivery person for something called Moogle Mail...”
Dungeons and Discords, and Dragons, and Daggers, and Diners, and Death Traps, and Dives, and Dice, and.... Part 2
Dungeons and Discords, and Dragons, and Daggers, and Diners, and Death Traps, and Dives, and Dice, and.... Part 2
[Ponyville, Seshat]
“So setting out you have your first major delivery into a dangerous area as a group. Anything left you need to pick up before you go?” Spike asked.
“Pity we can't afford a car or something.” Scootaloo mentioned.
“The address isn't that far out of town into the Midgar ruins.” Applebloom pointed out.
“I've got enough cash to pick up at least two more Phoenix downs so I'm gonna do that.” Fire Fly pointed out.
“I'll go bother that merchant again see if anything else fell off the truck today.” Discord smirked.
“Ehh.” Starlight added.
“I should be good to go whenever.” Sonata offered,” Though I'm gonna keep note of that car dealer ship for later.”
“ I'm gonna hit that taco cart again before we leave, no telling when we'll get back for some good food.” Sweetiebelle offered.
“Didn't your character just have breakfast?” Scootaloo asked.
“Yes, and?” Sweetiebelle grinned.
“Okay, so you all make your purchases, find the vendor has nothing he didn't have since this morning, and Sweetiebelle gets her tacos, so everyone has everything then? Cool. You set out, you make it about ten minutes from town and every one roll wisdom for me.” Spike smirked.
“10” “Ugh 3” “12” “Nice 22.” “15” “16” “Lets see add this... 15 as well.”
“Good. With the exception of Scootaloo, you all realize that none of you picked up the package you need to deliver before you decided to leave.” Spike offered.
“Damn it!”
[Later]
“Great now that the killer vines are out of the way and we reached this forge place. Who is this package even going to?” Applebloom asked.
“Well the name on the box reads a one Mr. E.E. Freet.” Spike offered.
“Ah gods....” Firefly grumbled.
“One of them, yes.” Discord cackled.
[ Later on]
“Hot sauce... we fought assassin vines, and bombs and a giant murder mantis to deliver Hot SAUCE!?” Starlight demanded.
“Is it at least good hot Sauce?” Sweetiebelle asked.
“The best.” Spike answered in a gargling voice as he pretended to be the massive demonic mini he had placed down on the table.
[ Even later]
“Who would kill our boss?” Scootaloo frowned.
“The same guy who killed my dad evidently.” Discord huffed. “Not cool turning my backstory against me by the way.”
“Then don't give me such an easy plot hook.” Spike smirked.
“I am now suddenly worried about my life choices.” Scootaloo muttered as Spike cackled.
“Told yah.” Applebloom huffed.
[ More Later, Less Now]
“So the turtle guy...” Firefly offered.
“Rasher.” Spike added.
“Rasher, was not dead, just fainted with his head pulled so far into his shell that I couldn't find it with a 30 medical check? HOW?” Firefly snapped. ”We have two medics and both of us thought he was dead.”
"He's getting bettah." Sonata chimed in.
“Glad you didn't spend the money you found on him now?” Spike grinned.
Firefly grumbled. ”That's 500k gil I need to just hand back.”
“Perils of being a hero.” Applebloom offered.
“Reikland is NOT a hero.” Firefly sulked.
[ How much later? Lots.]
“My stealth was perfect how did I get found out?” Sonata frowned.
"You forgot to check for traps dear." Discord added with a giggle.
“Right, so now you, Discord, and Applebloom are coated with a glowing phosphorus paint that you cant seem to wash or scrape off because you tried to break into the car dealer ship.” Spike chuckled.
“I go find the white mage and make him remove this. I'm a rogue who can't hide, the most useless kind of rogue.” Sonata huffed.
“You mean a bard?” Discord asked.
“No spoony bards here.” Sonata huffed.
“Ugh, I'll cast scourgify on them to get rid of the effects, we can't have a glowing neon rogue trying to get past a bunch of giant snakes tomorrow.” Firefly muttered. “ Plus I don't want the car dealer sending the Guards after us because of drunken character nonsense.”
“Who'd ah thought Midgar Serpent was plural.” Applebloom hummed.
[Later Still ]
“Do what Now? A war adamantoise?” Sonata questioned.
“Yep and those of you who passed perception can actually see it from the city it self marching through the mountains, the thing is massive like its own mountain. It's also on a bee line to Midgar, the term not the actual insect. The Shinra remnants you found are working to try and evacuate those in the town, and your big boss in Moogle Mail wants you to go get a package from a contractor on the other side of the mountains. He thinks it might help to slow the creature down.” Spike explained.
“Road trip while imminent doom falls, works for me. I got shot gun!” Sweetiebelle chimed.
“Sweetiebelle your character is the only one that knows how to drive the APC we bought.” Starlight sighed.
“Oh . Right.” Sweetiebelle admitted.
[ And even later]
“... go you have the package, I'll hold these ruffians off while you make your escape.” Spike offered in an old man voice.
“Nope. I cast float, and I'm gonna push the old man away from the power armored raiders. He can cast spells while I'm running away with him.” Firefly stated.
“Uhhhh.” Spike blinked. “Okay. He's not gonna resist that, cause he didn't expect it.”
“Pfft we can take them.” Scootaloo huffed.
“Scoots you went down in the surprise round from these guys and Discord's now carrying you around.” Sweetiebelle pointed out.
“You're heavy for a monkey.” Discord chuckled.
[ Later. Yes, that later.]
“HE'S DEAD?!?” Firefly snapped. “After all that !?”
“He was supposed to die letting you guys escape, but nooooooooooo you had to save his wrinkly butt. “Spike explained. “He made it here, trashed a bar in celebration, and drank himself to death.”
“Awww, poor Grammar.” Sonata frowned.
“Well okay, so he worshiped Ramuh, I suppose we can do last rights.” Applebloom suggested.
“How do the last rights for a Ramuh worshiper go?” Discord asked.
“Those of you who have the skill, roll knowledge religion.” Spike explained.
“12” “18” “18 as well.”
“Okay, Firefly and Starlight, Ramuh the god of lightning, comes to collect his most faithful followers personally. Usually when they are outside very shortly after their death.” Spike described.
Starlight and Firefly looked at each other then to Spike with dead pan expressions on their faces.
“So roll reflex since we're all around the body?” Starlight asked.
“Yup. Let's see who gets hit with the fuck all bolt of lightning.” Spike grinned.
“Just a heads up I did tell everyone the phoenix downs were in the right pouch of my pack.” Firefly offered as Spike shook two claw fulls of dice.
[ Later 2, Later Harder]
“You blew up the turtle.” Spike exclaimed in the voice he used for the Moogle Mail big boss.
“It was more of a tortoise.” Discord corrected.
“You were only supposed to distract it, not destroy it!” Spike quoted.
“Well I'd say it's very distracted right now, distracted over there, and over there, and a bit over there, wait is the taco cart okay” Sweetiebelle asked.
Spike rolled behind the screen. “The owner is, but the cart is destroyed.”
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” Sweetiebelle and Sonata cried.
[Later 2, 2 , the Nutcracker version]
“The giant red armored man looks down at all of you, turns to look back up at the sky then back to you. ' Here hold this for me a moment would you?' He states and hands you a massive silvery egg before he continues running, heading down the mountain.” Spike explained.
“What a nice fellow. He gave you a gift.” Sonata stated.
“Everyone roll reflex save for dragon fire.” Spike offered.
[ So much later.]
Right so you tracked the red armored man down, busted his illegal poaching operation, utterly obliterated him, and have brought several missing Wyvern eggs back to the nest of Wyvern that were camped out in the Rathalos mama's territory. She's given you a silver scale from her husband, you got to see the baby hatch and you have a name of the one who's head of the poaching operation, also the boss wants you to come to to Costa Del Sol.” Spike summarized. “Whatcha doing?”
“Well now that we have the airway clear for the goblin balloon we can charter a ride over the mountains to Junon, then hire a boat from there to get to where the big boss is, and we'll get there pretty quick since mama rathalos isn't gonna try to eat us.” Sweetiebelle offered.
“Alright you get underway, the goblins are happy the route is clear and offer you 20 gil off their last price.” Spike explained.
“Oh that's nice, that means we each just pay 80 gil rather than....” Starlight started to say.
“No no, not each , just 20 gil off.” Spike corrected.
“So six hundred and eighty gil then.” Starlight frowned.
[ Later 2 , electric boogaloo]
“So who's on third watch?” Spike asked.
“That would be me.” Firefly offered.” We're still on the balloon, there's goblin Guards, and my MP is good so I don't mind doing a watch for once.
“Alright, roll perception.”
“26”
“Alright. You're sitting there on the deck of the airship as it crosses over a section of the ocean on the way to Junon and you hear a voice, that sounds like it's coming from the water far below.” Spike explains.
“A siren?” Firefly questions.
“I didn't say anything.” Sonata offered.
“Not you.” Applebloom sighed.
“You don't know, but listening closer it seems to be trying to invite you to play scrabble.” Spike offered.
“Scrabble?” Firefly questioned.
“Yup.”
“Oh yeah it's a siren, the only pony I've met more interested in games than Firefly is Button Mash.” Scootaloo cackled.
“Not a pony.” Firefly huffed.
“Closer than Spike.” Scootaloo counters.
“She's got a point.” Applebloom offered.
“I'm still not calling any one to play scrabble.” Sonata offered.
“Still not you dear.” Discord smirked.
“I ask one of the goblin Guards if they know what it is.” Firefly continued ignoring Scootaloo.
“One of them mentions that they hear it every so often and they simply do their best to ignore it. Nothing bad ever comes from ignoring it until it goes away.” Spike explained.
“Cool I'm going to do that and then not mention a damn thing to any of the party in the morning because I know for a fact they'll want to go check it out and probably get us nearly killed again.” Firefly huffed.
“Spoil sport.” Discord laughed.
[ And then some.]
“Alright lets see. So .. I try to use my drudic powers to see if there are any fish in the sea.” Starlight offered.
There was a moment of silence as every one stared at her.
“What?” Starlight blinked. “ I can't use that to see if this is a good fishing spot?”
The others all broke out laughing and Starlight blinked looking to Spike.
“Okay.” Spike coughed stifling a chuckle. “ I see where you are coming from, I do, but go back and rethink the words you just said.”
“Use my...” Starlight sighed. ”Okay that does sound stupid.”
“Yeah unfortunately it's that sort of stupid that the rest of the group is gonna remember forever.” Spike explained. “ Sorry. Expect it to come up randomly for the rest of your life.”
“Damn it!” Starlight huffed.
[And Finally]
“Whelp that's where I'm gonna call it for the night.” Spike stated.
“OH COME ON!!” The whole table shouted at him, only making Spike's grin wider.
“ My characters family is not responding to any calls and the town where I grew up has gone silent.” Scootaloo snapped.
“I lost an Arm!” Sweetiebelle hissed.
“How the crap am 'I ' a warrior of light!?” Firefly snarled. ”My whole character is based on thinking being a hero is the worst thing ever! And you've got my home town under attack by undead swarms so now we have to rush there after we help Scootaloo's town.”
“I'm a palico now.” Sonata huffed. ”This doesn't even make sense and I'm the one saying that.”
“I'm still trying to figure out how I went from one soul in a suit of power armor, to over a thousand souls in an even bigger suit of power armor.” Discord blinked. ”Also this isn't a proper O&O session without a Moosy Python reference.”
“I made one back when we found out Rasher was alive.” Sonata offered.
“Ahh, okay then, carry on.” Discord hummed.
“Our boss launched a missile at us and blew up our tank after trying to git us all the way out to Costa Del soul.” Applebloom grumbled. ”Also Ah am not happy I'm now addicted to electricity and licking batteries.”
“You failed the rolls.” Spike offered his filly friend and some of the others.
“How did I wind up with the staff of the god Fenrir.” Starlight sighed.” And an entire cult of his worshipers chasing me so they can kill me and be promoted.”
“You decided to beat the guy and take the staff.” Spike stated.
“He was an assassin, this was loot.” Starlight retorted. “Heck why didn't he run off like the other two?”
“The other two were driven away by rolls of 1 and 3 on singing and Kazoo playing from Shade and Riekland.”
“Do not taunt the happy fun time kazoo of war.” Discord offered as Firefly rolled his eyes.
“At any rate, it's late, which means the game is over for now. Next time we can get every one together we'll pick up with it.” Spike stated.”If everyone's okay with that?”
“Yup” “Of course.” “I got nothing better to do.” “Whata you think.” “Beats twiddling my thumbs. And I'm good at that. Even without thumbs.” “Of course, but I'm still going to hold off on the augmented reality until Sweetie rolls a new character.” “Sure why not. This was interesting.”
Celestia was cold. An odd feeling, but not something she was unfamiliar with, after all she lived on top of a mountain that had snow most of the year.
What was most odd about it was she was in bed, the sun not due to rise for at least another hour according to her internal clock. It was about the point in the morning though that her body started waking up and any little thing would wake her up fully, the noise of the guards shifting outside, Luna screaming at some noble on the other side of the castle, or in this case a chill.
Winter was wrapped up a few days ago but there was still cool air blown in from the top of the mountain where the snow was left untouched save all the snow removed from Canterlot that was dumped on top of it outside the city. Up there it would take longer to melt, but it wouldn't swell the river going down the mountain and cause floods or mudslides. It did mean that if the wind was blowing the right way the city got rather chilly until the sun came out or the wind shifted.
Luna enjoyed the colder weather, given her fur color she rather hated the direct sun and she had issues with heat in the middle of summer.
Still that didn't explain to Celestia why her room was cold. Maybe she left a window open?
Celestia grumbled her breath tickling her nose under her blanket before she gave in and sat up. The air felt heavy and now that she was focusing it felt wet, stars was her room covered in morning dew, or maybe a cloud had gotten into her room again.
Not wanting to see the damage but needing too Celestia lit up her horn and opened her eyes expecting to need to dehumidify her books again.
What she did not expect was to be nose to nose with a fairly large gold and white koi.
Celestia blinked.
The fish nibbled at her nose before deciding it was inedible and swimming off.
Celestia followed the fish as it swam off seeing a number of other koi swimming through her room though long strands of seaweed fronds. A small crayfish scuttled across her blanket and dropped off the side of the bed. Leaning over the edge of the bed Celestia could see that the entire floor of her room was covered in lavender aquarium gravel. The hoof locker at the end of her bed suddenly opened releasing a glut of bubbles that floated up to the ceiling of her room. In the middle of the floor was a small bubbling statue shaped like Spike holding the trophy she won from the last Sister Hooves Social she and Luna were in. Next to it was a wind-up sperm whale that was swimming around in a circle on a string attached to the floor. There was a little griffon in a sailor suit bound by ropes to the white whale and a mass of harpoons and spears jutting out of whales body.
The Princess of the sun slowly blinked and cast a detection spell, finding that aside form the magic she expected in her room, the only unknowns were preservation spells on the books and scrolls, a sealing shield spell on the windows and doors of the room, and a hair clip attached to her mane that gave her water breathing. The rest of the room was a literal fish tank.
The Sparkles were getting better at this.
Her inspection of the state of her quarters was interrupted as the door to it opened out with a slam as a pair of Guards looked in along with Princess Cadence, Princess Luna, and Queen Chrysalis, a faint purple hue colored them as she met their gaze through the shield spell holding the water in.
"Ahh, so this is why the Sparkles sent you two to distract us this evening." Luna nodded sagely. " Wise tactic indeed, we hope they know that if they did this to our quarters and messed up or Neightendo saves we shall be most displeased in a way that we know they will survive, but not be glad of."
"I had no idea they were going to do this." Cadence offered looking to Celestia sitting up in her bed still looking at them. "Sorry Auntie"
"I KNEW!" Chrysalis cackled shoving the other two aside and flinging two large open bags full of angry piranha's through the door into the celestial fish tank.
[Ponyville, Crusaders' Clubhouse. Friday]
"You want us. To help you. Get a cutie-mark?"Applebloom questioned looking at the cheerful blue griffoness before them.
"Of course. Everyone's heard of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Gilda said that you guys were the best at finding cutie-marks and I should go find you if I wanted one. " Gabby trilled. "She said Rainbow Dash told her that you guys had found cutie marks for a bunch of ponies, and even a moon dog, whatever that is, and that I should get out of her face cause she was busy and go bother you guys or something, so here I am."
"Well. She's technically right. I mean, We've done at least a books worth of things to try and find our cutie marks, and most of the Crusaders got their marks." Scootaloo hummed. "There's me, Babs, Applebloom, I guess we can count Rahs in his pony form cause Applebloom was there, Sombra, though we're still trying to get Spike and Firefly a cutie-mark"
"Not happening." Spike offered.
"Hey!" Sweetiebelle huffed.
"I mean we still have a bunch of ideas to get Sweetiebelle to try out too." Firefly offered. " Most of them are even legal and marginally safe."
"That's great I could use the help to try and find my purpose in the world, I mean I deliver mail and try and help out though a lot of other griffons try and take advantage of that but I'm nice, not stupid, despite that and then I saw the ponies come up there and they helped out with stopping the Sirens and found the idol and just gave it away for nothing after a big fight and they were all so nice and all of them had cutie-marks and I read that ponies use that to find their place in the world and I kinda want to do that because aside from Gilda and Thunderbolt most griffons don't really care for anything I do and don't want to listen to me though some don't want to pay me and I guess there's Grandpa Gruff, but he's got Gallus to take care of and everyone else is just a butt, so I figured I would come out here to Equestria and talk to some ponies about seeing if I fit in better here. And I asked a bunch of ponies and all of them had heard stories of you and I figured you guys might be the best to help me get a cutie mark so I know what I'm supposed to do and fit in so here I am talking to you."
The collected Crusaders blinked.
"Under no circumstances are we to leave her and Pinkie Pie in a room alone together." Spike ordered.
"Agreed." the others stated.
"Oh would that get me a cutie mark?" Gabby asked.
"NO" was the collected response.
"Well. Good news is. We have a collected book here of all the stuff we tried. And none of it worked on us or Sweetiebelle, but maybe we just need to go back through it to see if we can get it to work with a griffon." Applebloom suggested.
"Well. We do have the spring break next week to help out with Winter Wrap up. Spike considered. "I guess we can go for it and see what we can pull off in a week."
"Maybe I can get a cutie mark in helping someone get a cutie mark." Sweetiebelle offered.
"What would that even look like? " Scootaloo boggled.
( Ponyville, Mayors office Thursday
Mayor Mare looked at the massive stack of paper work on her desk, then the four other even taller stacks on the floor of insurance forms.
Raven Quill sighed glancing at the stacks before setting down the next pile of insurance forms and repairs needing to be filed.
"I'm going to scream. And I do not know when I shall stop." Mayor Mare stated simply.
"Well, the Griffons wanting to set up a embassy here to match the sea ponies in the foothills of the Manterhorn will be a nice bonus." Raven offered.
"But all this?"
"The griffon hen that brought us the letter about finding a spot for their embassy wanted a cutie mark." Raven sighed. "Most of this damage was done when she painted her own mark on her flank starting a mad rush from every scientist and species purist that exists to come into town and raise Tartarus, even though it was OBIOUSLY paint to any one with two functioning eyes."
"What even is my life?" Mayor Mare grumbled.
"HEY, you, pony mayor."
The pair of them blinked and then looked up as a star spider that looked like it had been chewed up, spit out, set on fire, and then painted plaid, glided down from the ceiling on a thread.
"Murphy?" Mayor Mare asked.
"Yeah yeah. So, if we pay all our back taxes can we ensure those brats stay out of the forest?" Murphy questioned.
"You will get the same protections that the rest of Ponyville gets." Mayor Mare stated very quickly.
"Good enough." Murphy shrugged and had three other massive star spiders drift down from the ceiling and drop several massive bags of bit coins on the floor, making the whole office creak with the added weight to the floor.
"This is what was calculated by that big red stallion in the letter you sent, if he made a mistake that's your problem." Murphy snapped before drifting back up to vanish in the rafters shadows with the others.
"Well. That was something. Perhaps things are looking up" The Mayor offered right before the weight of the bits and all the paperwork broke the floor sending her office down into the lobby.
[ Crusaders clubhouse, Friday ]
“Well that was a week.” Spike sighed leaning back against the inner wall of the club house scraping a claw along one of the scales on his arm that was still bright orange. ”Pretty sure we speed ran several years worth of crusades.”
“And none of them worked a second time.” Sweetiebelle huffed from the table, her mane and tail currently cut very short after the gum tree sap incident.
“We did add a few more in there to account for Gabby though, so the book got filled out more on what doesn't work.” Firefly offered from where he was propped up in one of the rooms corners, he didn't appear to have anything wrong with him, though he was limping.
“Well we didn't do any of tha poison joke ones after what happened.” Applebloom offered from her spot next to Spike, her mane and tail were all triple braided as her mane and tail hair had grown to Rapunzel proportions.
“Well to be fair, I had a weird reaction.” Gabby offered from where she sat at the table. She didn't seem harmed either though she had spent two days after getting affected by the poison Joke as a Nox-Cal Nocturne that looked like a foal of Applebloom and Spike with its coloration.
“Meh, we've seen worse.” Scootaloo offered. The pegasus teen missing patches of her fur across her body.
“Well. We've used all the ideas in the book plus some, and this is the last day.”Firefly offered. “We've got a few on the to do list, but some of those take a good bit of prep work. We lost a little bit of that due to the riots.”
“Sorry.” Gabby muttered.
“Don't be, you were trying to be nice and show us our efforts meant something.” Scootaloo huffed. “Not your fault everyone else was stupid.” “Scootaloo’s right in that regard. Even my sister saw it was paint at a glance.” Spike shrugged.” She’s usually the last to notice minor details when she’s in a tizzy.”
“Yup, but forget all that, we're not liable for any of the damages any way since all we did was watch. I got you something.” Sweetiebelle offered digging through her saddle bag and pulling out a large cloak that almost seemed to shimmer.
“A Crusader cloak?” Gabby gasped.
“Did yah ask Rarity this time?” Applebloom questioned.
The group paused as an unearthly scream could be heard in the distance.
“Soooo. No.” Applebloom sighed.
“Even if you don’t get a mark, you’re still a Cutie Mark Crusader.” Sweetiebelle stated trying to ignore her impending doom.
Gabby blinked staring at the cloak before gingerly accepting it her beak wibbleing a little as she seemed to tear up as she pulled it on over her back, the size not far off being correct for Gabby’s size.
“Hey how come I didn’t get a cloak?” Firefly muttered to Scootaloo.
“Shhhh, she’s having a moment.” Scootaloo elbowed him in the side. ”And can’t you just make your wings look like a Crusader cloak?”
“It’s the principle of the thing.” Firefly huffed before Gabby managed to grab all of them up into another bone crushing hug.
“Gak!” “My spine.” “That better not be your hoof Firefly.” “I can’t tell if any my hooves are still attached.” “Air!”
“Thank you guys so much. I… I need to get on these deliveries I have , but I’ll come back as often as I can.” Gabby finally released them all and hopped over to the door twirling a bit with a giggle to make sure the cloak flared out before she burst out the door and tossed herself over the railing, yelping before she untangled her wings from the cloak and took to the air waving and blowing kisses to the group as she flew up over the tree line and out of sight.
“Well, that’s another fifteen things we can mark off the list, and I can go back and put ‘does not work on griffons’ to everything else.” Firefly considered.
"That was a cuteness overload that I have not witnessed since you gave my siblings heart attacks." Spike offered with a shudder.
"I know right?" Applebloom shook her head.
"No helping a griffon get a cutie mark cutie mark" Sweetiebelle huffed. "Lame."
"No seriously, what would that even look like?" Scootaloo demanded.
(Ponyville school house, Seriously will some one give this dump a name? Early Spring.)
“And this is the school house. Normally I'd be in class right now, but I got a pass for showing you around today. A good chunk of the year is spent in here learning.” Spike offered.
Ember looked at the building curiously.
“How would this even work? Is the building some pony magic to to teach?” Ember asked.
“No, it's just where the teachers teach, well... how do dragons educate their young?” Spike pondered. “ Bleu never really said anything about that. And I doubt the parents do.”
“That is correct. Most dragons will be taught the basics by a elder who has the patience for it, sometimes it's younger dragons that teach. Once the basics are done most dragons go do their own thing, some seek to learn more and shadow older dragons who have skills and knowledge they want. I followed my grandmother for a good ten years to learn what I could from her.” Ember stated. “I feel I didn't get a portion of it but I did learn to hate her sense of humor.”
“Well Pony's don't have a fully centralized system apart from the first years, with the variety of tribes and other races that live in Equestria it's rather difficult to get more than the basics. So basically all foals, or chicks, or whatever living in Equestria have to go through school usually starting at age 5 or 6. They start in the first grade with grades 1-4 in the same class. Often the older students are expected to help the younger ones with things along with the teacher. It's a bit different in bigger cities as they have more teachers and can thus have less grades per class, but the principal for these early classes is the same, math read, writing, rules and other things that are needed to set them up for their next years. Most of the racial things are left to the parents at this stage, flight, magic, and so on.” Spike explained. “Grades 5 to 8 are much the same but with more specialized classes being brought in, some more advanced math, history and geography, localized issues, and such. These years are usually some what peppered with field trips and guest speakers as it's about the time foals start getting cutie-marks and having a wide variety of interests presented offers multiple chances of finding out what one likes or is good at as well as pushing their education a bit further. I still say they need a tax code course however.”
“And that did not work for your friends?” Ember questioned
“Not at all.” Spike nodded. “This is also the point that a number of educations stop. Some ponies find their talent and focus fully on that and others already have family with positions that can be filled. Mostly farmers and some others in truth. This is pretty much where Ponyville school ends. Then there are the grades 9-12, High Schools, that offer a much broader education across more subjects. There's not many of these Schools, Celestia's school for gifted individuals is one such place. Luna was working on opening one in Ponyville due to the size of town particularly since it's still getting bigger. There are also a multitude of smaller 'Trade schools' that focus on specific things. Canterlot has a few unicorn specialty training schools for unicorns and for finance, and those are just the ones I know of. In recent years there have been a ton of 'Send Away schools' for people looking to continue their education in specific fields but can't manage to head off to a trade school. Applejack, Twilight and even Rahs have been taking advantage of these things, I think twilight's on her eighth or ninth doctorate at this point. Even though the courses are through the mail , you still need to take a test before you're cleared for anything in whatever trade you are going for. Me personally I'm finished with 8th and can be done with school, though I'm currently sticking around and helping Cheerilee with her classes, she's also teaching a small group with a 9th and 10th grade, but so far that's just got myself, Firefly, Scootaloo, and Sweetiebelle in it. Applebloom shows up too when she can but she's taking an alchemy and specialized science classes taught by Zecora and the god of Healing Ascepius, though the latter is mostly a mail class on Ascepius' end simply due to Twilight losing her shit every time she comes within 10 miles of the castle.
“That is a surprisingly convoluted practice.” Ember frowned. “I am not sure I can implement something like that.”
“I'm really only covering the basics there's a lot more too it than that, though there's a council of sorts that makes sure all the I's are dotted and the T's are crossed, and some how they make it work fairly well. The mail in classes might be your best bet for the dragons. You could find out what interests them and get them into various trades that way.” Spike suggested. ”If some one enjoys what they are doing, they are more likely to do it and that would open more trade for the Dragons as they gain specialists.”
“That has merit. I can see why the Dragon Lord wished me to speak with you about this.” Ember hummed.
“I think it's more that she could get me out of the house so she could have some alone time with my brother since Twilight's not in.” Spike sighed.
“SPIKE!”
A voice squeaked causing Ember and Spike to turn as a white unicorn filly ran up, followed by a lazily gliding orange pegasus with green fiery wings and a yellow earth pony filly with a massive red bow, behind them flew a colt with the same coloration as the other pegasus, only reversed making him a purple pony with orange hair, his wings were not on fire though.
The earth pony filly slowed and started giving Ember the stink eye in a way that made the young dragoness nervous.
“Oh hey what's up, class get out already?” Spike asked.
“Only because we were given a massive project to do.” Scootaloo sighed landing next to Sweetiebelle who was vibrating in place. ”Sup Ember.”
“Scootaloo.” The blue dragoness nodded.
“Come on after that parade float you guys made this should be easy.” Firefly offered.
“So are we teaming up?” Spike questioned as Sweetiebelle handed him a sheet of paper to look over. Ember leaned over his shoulder looking at it curiously.
All of them ignored the grinding of Applebloom's teeth at Ember being close to Spike.
“Huh so it's sponsored by local businesses. They're gonna deliver a block of apple wood to use and we only have a day to turn it into a race ready cart? Are they serious?” Spike questioned.
“They try to make it fair by giving as little time as possible, but we are all going to be allowed off on Friday in order to make the carts” Firefly explained. “The race itself is Saturday morning.”
Spike hummed.” Well at least we can get some one to help us, though they have to be able to ride in the cart too. Well that rules out Twilight, She's about as artistically creative as a lump of mud.”
“Mud can be rather artistic when it is thrown against something.” Sweetiebelle offered.
“My statement still stands.” Spike huffed. “The cart has to be able to finish the race if you want to win one of the awards. Fastest – for winning the race. Most traditional – for the best working replica of an original Apple wood cart? A what? And most creative – for the cart with the best overall design, hmmm I wonder who the judges are?”
“Pinkie Pie probably.” Scootaloo shrugged, “She has been the last couple years along with the Mayor.'
“I don't remember this race happening recently.” Spike frowned.
“They used to run it in the summer, but they moved it to the spring this year as it's been canceled so many times lately. A lot of crap has happened since you've been here, Tirek, Discord, the Crystal empire, that crap with the Storm King...” Sweetiebelle offered. ”Plus there's usual an age limit though it's been lifted a bit this year which is good because we're pretty close to aging out of it. We would have qualified for it four years ago normally and this would have been the last year we could compete, but they've adjusted it so we can get at least two more years if we want. They also lowered the age of admittance. Dinky's gonna be in it and she's at least four years younger than us.”
“Fair enough.” Spike shrugged.
“So who is this Spike...?” Applebloom spoke her voice sounding like a iceberg crashing into a cruise liner.
“Oh right , I guess Scootaloo's the only one who's met her. This is …. I guess we're going with cousin, my cousin, Princess Ember, she the regent of the Dragon Lord. She came to talk to Twilight about finding a way to educate the dragons a bit more.”
“Among other things.” Ember nodded. ”Dragon Lord Trixie has left me in charge and I will make sure that the dragons become more than dumb brutes under my watch. If I have to drag them kicking and screaming all the way”
“I thought you were her uncle?” Scootaloo offered.
“Ehh due to the age range and the fact I'm younger than her we just went with cousin, kinda like how Sunset is when she should be a grand aunt. “ Spike shrugged
“That tracks.” Scootaloo shrugged.
“Oh.” Applebloom responded her tone mostly normal though she still glared a bit at the blue dragoness.
Ember wisely took a step back away from Spike. She didn't want to get involved in this.
If the Dragon Lord was any indication, ponies were crazy when they got attached to some one.
“So you are going to ask your brother?” Ember questioned with a flick of her tail as Spike looked over the block of apple wood that had been delivered as well as the paperwork for the rules.
“Why, did you want to help me?” Spike asked.
“Not particularly, but why him and not your sister?”
“Because despite his apparent laziness, Rahs is actually a pretty good choice for this with his stage experience, carpentry, and design skills he has from all the times he's been dumped in the stage crew.” Spike explained frowning as he tapped a big knothole in the wood with a frown. ”Twilight's about as creative as a brick when it comes to anything non-spell related. Last time she tried painting she accidentally opened a portal into a fish hatchery outside of Moscow. Nothing like getting hit in the face with 400 gallons of freezing cold water and fish at high pressure to make you give up on painting”
“ Alright... though, isn't it against the rules for a god to participate in this though?” Ember asked tilting her head wishing she understood the pony language better, half the words on the page she was looking at over Spike's shoulder appeared to be made up word jumbles or just plain scribbles.
While Ember was new to learn about the other adopted Sparkle's deity status, mostly due to the Great and powerful Dragon Lord Trixie letting it slip in the hour long rant of what she would do if Ember decided she liked Trixie's Fuzzy, it wasn't something she was bothered by. After all watching Rahs and Twilight destroy a good chunk of the Cauldron showed her something was up with those two any way. Watching Spike take them both down after the Tourney when another argument started made her rather suspicious of him too despite Bleu saying he was only a demigod.
“You would think that. And after all the times Celestia and Luna crashed the Sister Hooves social... literally that one year, you'd think there would be a clause in the rules, but nope .” Spike shrugged.” We only have one day and while it would be nice to try and win all the categories, with my painting skills and his crafting prop skills our best bet is to focus on the most creative trophy and make something so over the top we can't help but win.”
“Well at least you have a focus.” Ember nodded.
“The hardest part about this will be getting him away from Trixie in enough time to actually work on this thing.” Spike grumbled.
[Ponyville]
“Wait you want me to help you?”
“Yup.” Scootaloo nodded, flitting back and forth in the air by flicking one wing then the other performing moves that would make a normal pegasus wince just watching the fuzzy orange pinball go. Physics evidently had taken one look at the filly and given up trying to exert itself on her.” Mom and Dad would help if I asked but neither of them have any kind of wood working skills or anything that could really be helpful.”
“I'm surprised you're not asking Rainbow Dash.”
“Dash is cool , and she's a lot of things. A planner and a builder are not those things however.” Scootaloo offered doing a barrel roll from a hover.” You however are both a planner and I've seen the designs you've made for Sulky carts.”
“I suppose, though those are at best hobbyist designs, I might not be a fan of flying, but I do enjoy the races. Alright. I'm game to help. What sort of design did you want?”
“Something FAST!” Scootaloo chimed in flying back and forth in the tight space of the room while upside down.
“Of course” Fireball sighed her eyes following her niece as she flipped around the room. “ I shouldn't have bothered to ask.”
“Really, you want me to help you? Why not your mom and dad? Your dad's an engineer.”
“Yeah a structural engineer, if we were building a tower that had to resist a bowling ball being dropped on it again I'd be going to him in a heart beat, but I need some one who has a bunch of experience in a bunch of things. ” Firefly offered as he sat back in the chair at the kitchen table in another part of the Ponyville Hive. ”Given the sorts of awards being given out I want to try and qualify for as many of those as I can. Pharynx is out because he's a warrior and I need a generalist, and right now it's either you, Thorax, or Bees.”
The two of them both looked to the left to the other side of the kitchen where Bees was covered in flower with a cardboard paper towel roll on his head.
“I'm the prettiest unicorn!” Bees chimed as he bounced around..
“Stop playing in the flour I need that for the cake!” Thorax yelled at him. Pharynx who was sitting in a chair away from the counter in the corner, took another sip from a mug that had a generous amount of coffee in it and a load of chocolate, continuing to ignore everything else thou the thousand yard stare he possessed made it clear he was very much aware of the others antics.
“Yeah. I see your point.” Kevin hummed. ”Alright, I'm in.”
“So I'm your third choice?”
“Well, yeah.” Sweetiebelle squeaked. “I mean first choice is big sister Luna, but she's got to deal with the fallout of the Sparkle Prank war and Queen Chrysalis restarting the conflict with Celestia with gusto, plus all the normal duties. Celestia is pretty much ignoring all her usual duties while plotting. Meanwhile Rarity is off doing something with her shop in Manehatten. You're here and you build stuff. Usually Rarity would have drug you off as well.”
“I work metal, not wood.”
“Yeah, but I looked over the rules and there's nothing saying you cant use metal so long as at least 40% of the cart is made of the apple wood block. The added weight alone would pull the cart faster down the hill than something made of just the block of wood.” Sweetiebelle offered. ”Plus, we can make it spiky and spikes are cool.”
“If you say so.” Sombra grumbled, though he already had a few ideas in mind.
“Right, I'm still not sure I follow this logic of yours kid.”
“Mai logic is perfectly reasonable and makes sense.” Applebloom retorted.
“Maybe to you, but first off I'm not even related to you.”
“Ah'm pretty sure ah ken trace an Apple back to somewhere in yer family line, but that's not even a requirement all ah need tah do is make sure yah ride along too.”
“Pretty sure you can't when it comes to my parents, but any way. Why not ask your actual sister?”
“Cause she'd make a big deal out of it and if Scootaloo gits Rainbow Dash or Sweetiebelle gits Rarity those three will blow it out of proportion like they do at tha Sister Hooves Social. Mai sister can get reaaaaaal competitive like.” Applebloom let out a snort. “An tha less said about what'll happen if one of tha class gits some one who's chasing Rahs tha better.”
“You do know I'm chasing Rahs right?”
“Yeah, but yer sensible about it.”
“Sunset is after Rahs too you know.”
Applebloom narrowed her eyes.” Ah said sensible not whatever Sunset is. And Seriously? Yah want me, tah go ask that mare tah go anywhere near something as flammable as an apple wood block?“
“Yeah, okay you win that round.”
“So whata yah say? Wanna help me build something that'll make ponies put on socks just tah have um knocked off?” Applebloom questioned.
“You know what. Sure. This could be fun and if not, at least dad will get a kick out of it.” Aria shrugged.
Spike and Rahs lean over a table in on the stage of The Ball, with Rahs pointing at something on the large piece of paper draped across the table. Rahs draws out something on it and gestures to another line then pulls out a magazine showing Spike what he was talking about. Spike nods then draws more on the large paper the pair of them bickering back and forth as they work.
Do it Makes us
Fireball runs a tape measure over the block of apple wood making a mark on it as Scootaloo does the same on the other side. Scootaloo then grabs for a saw before Fireball stops her and gestures to measure again doing the same herself before they start cutting.
Harder Better Faster Stronger
Sweetiebelle and Sombra look at each other then both nod their heads, the movement flipping the welders masks they wore over their faces. They then both turn their attention to the monstrous thing they were working on as the flare of a blow torch lights up the room.
More than Hour Hour Never
Firefly screams out as he swings around a large mallet over his head. The young changeling chasing after Bees as he runs through the living area of the hive, both of them covered in green paint. Kevin and Thorax stand nearby, the former watching the chase with a small frown and the other with his face buried in his hooves.
Ever After Work is Over
Work it Make it Do it Makes us
Harder Better Faster Stronger
“SONOTA SHUT UP” Aria screamed out throwing a wrench at her sister who dodged it easily as she would a ball. “We are trying to work here and we don't need the musical accompaniment!”
“It was kinda catchy.” Applebloom offered looking up from the plans the two had been making on the drafting table. ”Still not sure where we're gonna git a wind tunnel from but this is doable so far.”.
“Don't encourage her. At least she didn't do the montage song.” Aria sighed.”We only have so long to work on this thing, now that the design is done we need to hit testing to refine it and then work on building it.”
( Day of the Race, early morning)
“Heeeelloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo race fans and non race fans, who are here for some reason which is weird cause this is a race and if they aren't fans why are they here? Welcome to East Slope Raceway for the return of the annual, Applewood Derby. I'm your favorite announcer, an up until now your ONLY announcer, PINKIE PIE!” Pinkie Pie ranted through the loudspeaker connected to the booth she sat in. The wooden structure towering over the field allowing her to see the entire course from start to finish. ” We have quite a number of things to cover before we begin today as there have been a few rule changes by the committee we need to go over. To cover most of those new rules is my lovely assistant, who is totally not here only because she still has community service hours left, Princess Twilight Tuesday Sparkle, who's not really a Princess, that's just her name.”
“Right … thank you Pinkie …. To start with due to the rather excessive amount of entries this year we are separating the speed races into heats, with each racer first racing everyone else from the town they came from The top three from that town will then be put into a final heat with all the others in a ranking system based on the time they crossed the finish line, the faster the time the further up you will be.” Twilight explained. The same shall be done for both the historical voting and the design voting with the top three in each town in each category then competing with the region with different judges who to prevent bribery attempts which would end VERY badly for them, will not be identified until such a time as they are needed to judge. Trophies will be awarded for local and regional races and contests so if you place in the top three of your town you will still be awarded even if you do not place top three in the regional. There will also be a fourth category this year that will be presented by this years sponsor. Mr. Taurine.”
The third figure in the booth also took up the largest amount of it. A large Burgundy colored Minotaur sat beside the two ponies. He wore a blue and silver jacket and had a wide grin and silver sunglasses on as well as a red do rag on his head with his horns painted in a black and yellow checker board pattern.
“Greetings race fans I'm your sponsor of the event that we are calling THE RED BULL CHALANGE!” His words were accompanied by an explosion of fireworks. “My name is Mister Taurine and I've got ONE question for you, just one! EXPLOSIONS!?!”
There were a lot more fire works at that and a grinning Trixie at the launcher who was already counting the bits in her head as a nearby Ember shook her head at the theatrics.
“Why that question you might ask? Well simple, I know a lot of you came out here to watch fast carts tear down the track, and others came out to see what fantastic builds these, kids, grubs, chicks, foals and OTHER SMALL VERSIONS OF THEIR ADULTS came up with. Heck some of you probably came out here to be nerds about how historically accurate some one can make a block of wood. AND THATS PERFECTLY OKAY!! But some of you came out here for the competition the nail biting chaos of a hard fought race. And so for THE REDBULL CHALLENGE!...” more fireworks went off. “....To make this race all the more nail biting we set up ramps and obstacles and traps all along the course selected and we're gonna let everyone who wants to race this all go at once in A ANYTHING GOES EXPLOSIVE WACKY RACE OF CARTMAGEDDON!!!!”
“Ooh sounds fun.” Pinkie Pie chimed in. “What's the prize for the winner?”
“WE DON'T KNOW!” Mister Taurine shouted to more fireworks. “My tech guys set it up and they won't tell me because they know I can't keep my mouth shut, I AM TERRIBLE AT SECRETS!”
“HOLY CARP, WHAT A MATCH!” Taurine screamed out from the box. “Those young ones from Hoofington really know how to race. “
“That was an awesome three way finish, I can't wait to see if any of them are willing to give the grand prix a go.” Pinkie Pie cheered along with the large rust colored minotaur. At some point she had gotten her own black and yellow checkerboard colored bandanna to wear around her neck.
Twilight rubbed her temples, her ears flat against her head as the shouting from both sides was giving her a migraine. The races had been mildly interesting. Six towns including Canterlot had run through their events. The awards for Creativity, Historical significance, and Speed had all been given out, some of the participants managing to walk away with an award from more than one category. The final contests would start after all the towns had raced, then the last Red bull challenge would happen after that as the closing race.
The judges were made up of three middle managers from the sponsoring company, some self help celebrity Twilight had never heard of, and three of the members of the Equestrian school board. Thus far they had been fair, but Twilight noticed a bias for unicorns over the other racers from the school board, luckily the other three balanced the School board members out and the Celebrity was just throwing out numbers depending on what she thought 'Sparked Joy'.
Ponyville however was the last town to compete and the sponsors showed they were not idiots. A large number of unicorns had shown up and were raising shields in front of all the stands and spectators along the length of the track layering the spells to create something of a tunnel down the entire length of the course.
Twilight was rather impressed with the spell work. She was also surprised to see a number of changelings floating around holding boxes with crystal recorders documenting the entire series of races. It was even more surprising that Saturnia and Sunset seemed to be here coordinating the filming. Sunset had talked about needing a sporting event of some sort as a major draw on her crystal net thing she was working on.
Twilight had listened with some interest at it, supposedly videos and films could be put on her network in a frame work she was calling U Two or something like that. There was another system she had been bitching about that had already been set up already, despite her intent not to have it called, 4 something. Twilight was more interested in learning more about this Face a Book Sunset had talked about. It sounded like a fun reading experience.
Applejack was here cheering on Applebloom along with Big Mac and Granny Smith, though AppleJack seemed some what miffed about something.
Jynx had shown up as a number of Diamond Dog pups had participated in this race, thus far two of them had even won prizes and seemed ecstatic when she congratulated them personally.
Trixie and Ember were of course doing fire works every time Taurine yelled something particularly impressive. Twilight wondered if there was a list that she was checking to see if Taurine said the right word to prompt an explosion.
Thus far Twilight had figured out some of the words that prompted fireworks. 'Red Bull Challenge', 'Explosion or explosive', 'Cartmageddon', 'finish line' and for some reason, 'grapefruit'.
Still Twilight was rather worried. All of Rahs' girl friends were in the same place, Rahs and Spike were IN the race, the Cutie mark crusaders were all IN the race and one of Discords kids was also in the thing. That wasn't to even consider the rest of the Ponyville school crew and Sombra in the mix.
The sponsors of the event were clearly careful, but she hoped they really knew what they were getting into.
“....That was Dinky Do and Comet Tail with their cart the cheerful Capybara. For all those in the stands currently having heart issues from the cute, please note that the medic tents are behind the bleachers on both sides of the race track and that we are not responsible for any injuries here at the speed way. Next up from Ponyville is the silver Bullet by Applebloom Apple and Aria... BY PRINCESS CELESTIA”S DAINTY HOOVES WHAT IS THAT THING!!??” Taurine screamed out.
The silver painted cart looked like a cigar and practically seemed to vibrate in place as it rolled up to the starting line, it was streamlined in the way bricks were not, and the faint breeze flowing over the race track seemed to part over the thing like scissors hitting that perfect cutting glide when used on wrapping paper. The cart seemed to be causing speed lines to appear just by existing. Seated inside it was a yellow filly with a helmet on that looked like it was part of the cart until she lifted her head up enough. The back of it was open and there was enough room for another pony to fit inside, and poke their head out of the cock pit. That pony was clearly the lavender one with long pig tails that she was tucking into her silver helmet as she stopped behind the cart looking over as the judge approached staring at the cart.
“So what is this?” The school board judge asked, her magic scanning over the cart.
“A marvel of engineering.” Aria chuckled.
“78% apple wood, 15% aluminum? 7 % miscellaneous.” The Judge nodded. “Well it meets the rules. Good luck.”
The judge turned around and was left facing another thing. This one was painted a glimmering cherry red and was slightly more wedge shaped than the cigar shape of the other one. A orange pegasus filly sat behind the wheel, the thing having an open back which would allow the orange adult pegasus to climb in easier. Despite that, even standing still this one seemed on the verge of taking to the air.
“BY THE GOD OF BOOZE'S POINT HORNS THERE'S TWO OF THEM!!”Taurine bellowed.
“That one is called 'The Falcon's Dare' and is driven by Scootaloo and Fireball.” Pinkie Pie listed.
“Huh... modern Equestrian engineering versus portal world engineering.” Twilight considered.” This could be a interesting study, and one with at least a 27% less chance of death.”
“Wait 27% less? “ Taurine asked. ”THAT'S STILL TOO HIGH!”
“They're both being driven by Crusaders.” Pinkie Pie pointed out.
“Ahh. Okay 13% less chance then. With a added 25% chance of tree sap.” Twilight corrected.
“THOSE NUMBERS ARE GOING THE WRONG WAY!” Taurine snapped.
“77% apple wood, 5% steel, 12% cloud? 6% other.” the judge hummed. ”This doesn't fly does it?”
“It could with a pegasi pulling it and the proper enchantment, but on it's own, no.” Fireball offered. ”It's designed to fit the rules.”
“Fair enough.” The judge nodded and walked among some of the other carts scanning and nodding at them, before she stopped and stared at the block of apple wood with wheels on it that two unicorn colts were sitting on. Ignoring that as the announcers bantered, she was then forced to stop and stare at another vehicle.
“What even is that thing?” The judge stared at the green tank looking cart.
“That's a Mark 1b Pattern Rhino, or more formally, the Mars Pattern Rhino, is an Imperial armored personnel carrier that is widely used throughout the galaxy by many different factions, though it is a mainstay vehicle of the Adeptus Alicornuis. It has provided safe transportation since the days of the Great Crusade, transporting its cargo of Space Marines swiftly and safely to the forefront of battle.
Robust and versatile, and able to resist the most hostile of environments, the Rhino has become the basic troop transport for Space Marine squads. It has also been used by many other trusted branches of the Imperial armed forces.” Taurine ranted. “This one is currently done up in Dark Angels livery and colors. It's also got six wheels instead of treads which work well for the road surface.”
Most of the audience turned to stare at the large minotaur.
“WHAT?! I'M ALLOWED TO HAVE HOBBIES OTHER THAN EXPLOSIONS AND MUSCLES!”
“This cart was put together by Firefly and Kevin. Everyone knows Kevin. I wonder why he's helping one of the Changeling grubs.” Twilight considered.
“HE'S JUST THAT KINDA GUY!” Taurine shouted.
The two hatches on top of the rather wide box like cart opened and Firefly popped his head out of one. A space marine helmet popped out of the other. Both of them looked at the judge who sighed and scanned it.
“60 % apple wood, 22% plastics, 10% various metals, and 8 % paint?” the judge blinked.
“Bees got a hold of it while we were doing the base coat.” Kevin offered his voice muffled by the helmet.
“Alright. Well good luck that is a interesting one.” The judge shook her head, moving on as other Ponyville foals were introduced as she came to their carts.
She stopped again.
“I know I have said this far to often today, but what the <BLEEP!!> IS THAT THING?!?!” Taurine shouted blinking and turning his head to Twilight whose horn was glowing.
“Language.” Twilight stated simply.
“Here we have Sweetiebelle and Sombra in their cart Aunty Entity.” Pinkie Pie announced considering throwing something at Sombra for biting Fluttershy, but decided to hold off for now.
The judge stared at the massive thing. It was a six wheeled cart bigger than the rhino tank and made of metal, there was a massive spiked ram on the front, a row of spikes going up to what looked like a gunner's seat off an airship, further up was the drivers seat with more spikes all over it, and a massive spoiler on the back. An actual spoiler like off some of the sulky carts she had seen, not something as banal as 'His father was the rogue dragon' or ' the predator dies horribly' like some people probably expected.
Her gaze shifted to the two leather and spike festooned ponies in the cart. The filly was wearing a leg brace and a black leather jacket with her mane and tail short and it looked like her fur was stained with soot and grease. She was sitting in the drivers seat. The stallion next to her was wearing a number of leather straps and a steel hockey mask. Both of them were staring unblinking at her.
The judge shuddered casting the scanning spell.
“39.5% apple wood, 45% steel, 5.5% chrome, 8% leather, and 2% other.” The judge listed. “I'm sorry but you are under the required amount of Apple wood, I'm going to have to disqualify you.”
“Mediocre.” Sweetiebelle huffed. Sombra's horn lit up and he pulled a bolt free. Sweetiebelle pulled off the steering wheel which was a ring of welded chrome chain and tossed it out of the cart as Sombra brought a burnt wooden steering wheel up and bolted it in.
“Scan again.” He stated in a gruff voice.
The judge swallowed and cast.“40% apple wood, 45% steel, 5% chrome, 8% leather, and 2% other.” The judge stated. “ That meets the requirements.”
She quickly hurried on as the pair continued to stare unblinking at her.
“Rarity is gonna kill those two when they see all the leather they are using.” Pinkie Pie offered.
The Judge stopped again and reached a hoof up to rub her forehead. Sitting ahead of her was a modified Mount Prospect City Guard cart. It looked to have Guard Tires, Guard suspension, Guard shocks, and was a model made before mana gem restrictions so it ran good on a regular charge.
Of course this was only a model.
What was weird was the massive crystal powered speaker that looked like it was stolen from a stadium speaker pole strapped to the top of it.
She sighed running her scan as she looked for the drivers.
“65% apple wood, 18% paper mache, 7% speaker, 5% plaster, and 5% other parts.” the judge sighed as the speaker started blasting a jaunty rhythm as soon as her magic completed.
Glancing to the back of the cart the trunk opened and a purple dragon in a black suit and fedora wearing sunglasses rolled out. He adopted a pose and a much taller blue diamond dog thing practically slid out of no where to smoothly stop beside the dragon. He was also in a suit with sunglasses and a fedora.
The judge blinked as several wolf whistles sounded in the area and both Rahs and Spike reached up adjusting their ties.
“Ah stars, of course they went with THAT play as a model.” Twilight grumbled. “Highest recorded cart destruction number of any play ever made. And all his girlfriends now have seen him in a suit.”
Twilight, Pinkie, and Taurine all looked to where Jynx, Sunset, Trixie, and Saturnia were staring at Rahs, though it seemed Applejack was the one who let out the whistle from her place on the other side of the stands.
Applebloom and Aria were also staring, but each at a different brother.
[Crystal empire]
“BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA DANCE FOR ME MY PUPPETS!!” Cadence cackled.
“So was that a yes on the large hay fries?” The bored looking counter worker asked.
“Yes and go with the apple treats rather than the chocolate cookies in the Children's Chipper Chow Chompy. I want the foals to sleep sometime today.” Shining offered as Cadence continued to laugh.
The Race was..... well, a disappointment for a great many of those who had come here for, as Taurine put it,' Explosions'. Not to say there wasn't a wreck, Snips and Snails had no control of their block of wood at all and bounced off Sweetiebelle and Sombra's monstrosity, doing no damage to it, but sending the two colts and their cart crashing into the hay bales along the route near the start.
Sweetiebelle and Sombra didn't even notice the impact.
In the end the speed winners were Scootaloo and Fireball taking first by an inch with Applebloom and Aria taking second with Dinky and Comet Trail taking third.
The foals devolved into smack talk, the adults compared engineering notes... and smack talk.
The Historical contest was won by Snips and Snails, given that one of the first racers was just a log with wheels on it that was used to transport wood down the mountain. Silver Spoon won second as her cart was a fair recreation of the first winner of the races when they became official. The driver of the first cart turned out to be her great times whatever grandfather. Third place went to Pip who had made a boat and slapped wheels on it. He might have won the most creative over Firefly though he repeatedly pointed out that the wheeled boats were how they used to move the logs in Trottingham where he was born because the end of the course was a river and thus his wasn't creative but historical.
The creativity contest was won by Twist as her car was set up to look and was 35% composed of candy. Second place was Sweetiebelle and Sombra, with third place being taken by Firefly and Kevin. This all started a massive disagreement between the judges because the board of education judges were giving much lower scores to anyone who was not a pony and the only reason Firefly even placed is no one else in the Ponyville entries had gone creative, aside from those three teams and Spike, most had built for speed. The argument between the judges had gotten heated enough that Jynx, Trixie, Saturnia, and Discord got involved.
That was five minutes that was not good for anyone being racist.
The sponsor's security team showed up before a hospital or a psych ward was needed. The three school board judges were removed and there was a brief recess while new judges were brought in. While the new judges were being brought in the overall time trials were held with Applebloom and Aria barely eking out first place and Scootaloo and Fireball taking second and a unicorn filly and her father from Canterlot taking third.
New judges were chosen, which amounted to three more sponsors middle mangers. They didn't go back to rework any of the other numbers, which started another argument, mostly from Jynx, Saturnia, and Trixie while Discord simply loomed, but the judges mollified them by pointing out that several diamond dogs, Changelings, Nox-Cal, griffons, had won something.
None of the Ponyville crew won most creative because some of the other towns had carts that would make a parade float jealous.
Trixie and Ember were not happy about the only Dragon in any of the races not placing, though Spike told them both to let it go.
Historical final was won by a colt that slapped wheels on the apple wood block after he carved it to look like a realistic log. Snips and Snails got second with Silver Spoon taking third due to how accurate her reproduction was.
With all that out of the way and Discord grinning evilly as he plotted something while staring at the School Board Members,
While Twilight was happy to be told some new history she hadn't known by Pip, she was also rather worried that everything had been so calm. Though statistically there had to be at least one normal event just to balance out everything else that happened. Still she was struck with a sense of dread she couldn't understand.
“WELL THAT WAS EXCITEING!!” Taurine screamed “And now what you've all been waiting for, the final event, THE RED BULL CHALLENEGE!!I've got the tally and there will be fifty six racers from every town competing. There are new rules to follow, first off this will be AFULL CONTACT SPORT! CHEATING IS ALSO ALLOWED TO A DEGREE. You cannot touch another racers cart directly, no teleporting or equivalent, wheels have to be ON THE GROUND for at least 60% of the race and NO DIRECT ATTACKS ON OTHER RACERS! First one across the line wins, we have second and third place prizes as well and now that all the entries are locked in, ALL ONE HUNDRED AND TWELEVE competitors will get a case of our sponsors drinks. We now break for thirty minutes to set up the course AND SIGN THE WAIVERS!!”
“Ahh there's the other horseshoe.” Twilight groaned.
Twilight stared down at the dimensional shenanigans arrayed on the track before her. There were twists turns, loops, jumps, impossible turns, oil slicks, banana peels, and moving hay bales. The track was MUCH wider than should be possible and the number of unicorns casting protective spells was doubled.
“How....” Twilight frowned. ”This much fabric of reality twisting is something like Discord would do.”
“Oh it is. The sponsor hired him.” Pinkie Pie added
“That makes so much sense, and yet...how much are they paying him for this?” Twilight asked.
“Twelve bits and a high five” Taurine offered. “It was the most EPIC of high fives.”
Applebloom and Scootaloo glanced at each other then back to the coarse with Aria and Fireball offering a more hesitant glance to each other, before they both tightened their helmets. Sure they wanted to see who was faster and a better designer, but this was a bit much.
Firefly and Kevin considered dropping out, but opted to go for it, cause why not. Though Kevin wouldn't let Firefly have any of the drinks as there was too much caffeine in them and he wasn't old enough yet.
Sombra and Sweetiebelle were all for it. Sombra actually smiled when the full contact rule was announced, Sweetiebelle just cackled.
Dinky some how managed to convince Comet Trail to go for it. Comet Trail regretted the idea the moment he looked down the course.
A number of other racers stared down the ramp and a few of them decided that they were just going to pass, free drinks and unknown prizes were hardly worth it. That still left forty two carts and twice as many racers.
Rahs and Spike sat in their cart looking down at the field through their sunglasses.
“We've got forty two other carts in the race, a couple bits of jerky, a claw full of gems, a rickety show cart, it's getting dark, and we are wearing sunglasses.” Spike offered.
“Punch it.”
The whistle sounded and the carts started rolling forward.......
"Had you worried didn't he?" Discord chuckled "Evil little rabbit."
Applebloom and Scootaloo’s carts took off like a shot from the start, the well engineered carts easily out pacing everything else in the first opening stretch, though there were a number of other carts that were not that far behind. In the middle of the pack was Firefly’s tank and Spike’s cop cart with Sweetiebelle’s wasteland mega cart slowly building up speed from the very back.
Thus far all the other carts were keeping their distance from each other and running a clean race on the first stretch. The first turn changed that as there was a bit of bumping as some carts that didn’t turn too well bumped into other ones and a pair on the outer edge hit the hay bales with a crash, though both of them quickly pulled the carts out and started them back on the track, the first impacts started the mayhem. There was a great deal of bumping and paint swapping before some one at the back of the pack let out a cry as Sweetiebelle’s cart hit the back of a couple of the slower carts and flung them aside or crushed their wheels as it rolled over them. Several ponies fell free of their carts only to be wrapped up in protective ball shields and sent careening off the track into a hole with a large red triangular flag over it with a number 18 on it.
Discord could be heard offering a golf clap.
The impending mass of spiked metal behind them spurred a number of racers to lay off the brakes and try to push their carts for more speed.
With the first turn out of the way the ramps came up and Applebloom and Scootaloo were the first to hit them.
Aria cursed at each impact as the cart landed, despite Applebloom keeping it steady though each of the ramps, the landing slowed the cart down despite the overly engineered nature of its shocks.
Scootaloo and Firefly’s cart however hit the ramp and glided over the next three before landing due to the design working more like a sulky cart allowing them to pull ahead of Applebloom’s cart for the first time.
Several others hit the ramps after them, jumping without too much issue though one cart landed wrong and snapped off an axle, several carts avoided as many ramps as they could though one flipped over and the drivers were bubbled free just as Sweetiebelle and Sombra rolled over their cart and smashed through the ramps rather than jump them.
The following sharp turn was L shaped and started a sharp zigzagging slalom of a road down the hill. It was hit first by Scootaloo though her cart was sliding across the road to light to hug the ground well, Fireball stood up in the cart spreading out her wings forcing the wind up like a spoiler in order to keep the cart on the ground.
Aria stood up as well though she half hung off the left side of the cart, pulling her weight on that side and forcing the shocks down more so when Applebloom took the L shaped turn the cart only skidded a little keeping traction enough to pass Scootaloo and Fireball .
A few carts following skidded off the side and tumbled off the edge only for the drivers to be rescued with shield balls.
One griffon stood up in the back of his sons cart, sank his claws into the wood as the cart didn’t bother to turn at all and instead launched off the side of the cliff. He snapped his wings open and held on as the cart glided down bouncing off the road in the next tier and hopping down the road touching down only to launch again.
A number of other flier carts followed this using the same trick.
Spike just drove straight off the edge with both he and Rahs holding onto their hats as the cart bounced it’s way down the next road landing in front of Applebloom’s cart forcing her to slow. Spike glanced back offering her a smile, saw the look on her face and wisely zipped out of the way driving off the next cliff as her faster cart roared past, though not fast enough to stop Scootaloo from passing them both.
Comet Trail stood up in the back of Dinky’s cart sticking out one wing to drag against the air allowing Dinky to take the turn almost sideways doing the same with his other wing on the next turn, the wheels of her cart kicking up blue sparks as they drifted.
Firefly followed the others driving straight off the side of the cliff, the mock rhino bouncing a few times but plowing down the side of the mountain and the serpentine road as if it was nothing though you could hear Kevin yelling out in a panic, the wild ride didn’t even chip the thick paint.
The griffons in the lead hit the ground far along the track and were immediately bubbled despite their cart being undamaged. A large warning in bright red comic sans appeared over them showing they had surpassed the 40% of the track flown over limit.
Most of the other fliers dropped down sooner and missed the penalty though one landed on a banana peel and spun out and off the course.
Sweetiebelle and Sombra roared off the side of the road bouncing at the edge of each curve , every landing cracking the road below them.
After the next turn the slalom started where the racers had to weave around flagpoles.
Applebloom and Aria both leaned as the slalom started, the pair shifting their weight enough with each curve that they blew past Scootaloo who was still struggling with the weaving curves even with the wing air brakes Fireball was providing. The pair of them still easily took back the lead from the ones who flew down the side of the hill.
“Hopper mode!” Firefly yelled.
“I got the wheel.” Kevin called as Firefly rolled out of the seat into the back .
The seams of the rhino lit up in a green flame and massive pair grasshopper legs kicked out from the underside of the cart, lobbing the tank over the entire rung of slaloms to land in front of Scootaloo and Applebloom. Kevin laughed as he weaved the cart back and forth, the wide rhino keeping either of the speedsters from passing.
Rahs climbed out of the side of the cart still holding onto his hat reaching his other hand into his coat and pulling out a stage crook, before stretching it out and catching the pole for the first barrier in the slalom allowing Spike to whip around it without losing speed as he held onto the roof. At each pole he hooked it with the crook and held onto for the turn.
Just behind him Comet Trail was doing the same with his weapon chains as Dinky tore around the turns.
Behind them Sombra and Sweetiebelle just smashed through the barriers sending a few other racers flying who were not making the turns fast enough.
Spike took the next turn onto the straight away with the moving hay bales though those were easy to avoid as Rahs climbed back into the cart. A glance behind them and the other approaching racers had Spike open the glove box and reach in, pulling a stack of wet mane pony Rahs photos out.
Something Rahs was not happy about.
Spike tossed them all out the window, the photos fluttering over the racers still behind them and drawing the attention of a number of mares and a couple of stallions in the group who made a snatch for the images only for the weight shift to send the drivers out of control and spinning off to wreck or slow enough for Sombra and Sweetiebelle's beast to knock them out of the way.
“Screw this. Aria snarled climbing onto the top of the cart before grabbing the sides and shifting to her full Siren form. She slammed her tail into the track shattering it and launching herself, the cart and Applebloom up and over the boxy Rhino, shifting back as it landed, the car shooting towards the next turn.
“Switch.” Fireball stated as Scootaloo slipped to the back of the cart. Fireball braced , spreading her wings wide as Scootaloo fanned her own flaming wings like a rocket engine sending their cart soaring over the Rhino.
“OH COME ON!” Firefly shouted as the two carts soared over them.
A glance in the mirror showed Spike was gaining on them with the rest of the pack, though one of them crashed into the crater Aria left and was bubbled out. The rest were spread out around the dragon's cart and the looming metal monster behind them.
“I think it is time we become more proactive Sweetiebelle.” Sombra offered as the lead group approached the next turn at the end of the hay bales, his horn flared as a mass of black crystals erupted from the track in front of the other racers.
“Isn't that against the rules?”
“I am not attacking them directly nor their drivers. If a crystal gets in their way, they should turn.” Sombra hummed
“Fair enough.”
Aria and Applebloom screamed out as the crystals appeared in front of them , the pair jukeing to the left.
Scootaloo and Fireball screamed as the black crystals appeared in front of them and juked to the right.
The fastest carts in the race smashed into each other and bounced off, before both went spinning out of control and crashed into the hay bales on either side of the road none of them even touching a crystal.
Firefly and Kevin slid around the Crystals clipping one and being sent into a spin that they recovered from, but not before a number of racers zipped past them including Spike and Dinky.
Rahs leaned out the window and took a bite out of the magic supporting the black crystal making Sombra cry out and shut down the spell forcing the other crystals to crumble.
Rahs offered a griffonese salute to Sombra as Spike's cart took the lead with Dinky and some other racers right behind them followed by Firefly after he got the rhino under control.
Rounding the corner every single one of the racers eyes widened at the sight of a pair of loop de loops before the last turn to the finish line.
“Sweetiebelle remember that idea you had for the chamber you had me forge for the back of the cart.” Sombra frowned rubbing the base of his horn and glaring at Rahs.
“Yep.”
“Do it.”
Sweetiebelle cackled and moved to the back of the cart letting Sombra take the wheel, she slipped under the spoiler and into a pipe looking thing at the back of the cart.
“Darkness beyond twilight, crimson beyond blood that flows.....” Sweetiebelle called from inside the chamber.
Sombra pulled on a pair of cross seat belts and gripped the wheel tightly aiming to hit the loops straight on.
“This is gonna be tough.” Kevin muttered looking up at the loops.
“DRAGON SLAVE!!!”
“OH SHIT!” Spike and Firefly cursed yanking their carts to the sides of the track as the massive metal monster rocketed forward on the power of the spell erupting from the chamber at the back of it , smashing through a number of the remaining carts and obliterating the track behind them.
Dinky juked to the right to get out of the way, though Comet Trail spun up his chain lashing out and wrapping it around the spoiler as the metal cart flew past on the power of the spell. The chain wrapped around it and the Guard braced as Dinky's cart was yanked along after the dragon slave powered cart and both tore up the road going up and around the first loop blasting towards the second one.
Rahs and Spike looked at each other before they both held onto their hats taking the loop at an angle and falling off the side, barrel rolling to land hard with all wheels on the track without having completed the loop fully, a trick a number of other racers tried. Some failed, either flipping wrong or crashing into each other, one spread her wings and got dinged and bubbled for going over 40% of the track in the air. Clearly Discord was keeping track.
Comet Trail held on as Sweetiebelle's spell continued rocketing the cart through the second loop, the rest of the pack doing the same as the first loop and only losing one more racer when their wheel popped off on the landing.
Whipping around the final corner into the home stretch Sweetiebelle's spell fizzled out and the woozy filly climbed back up to the drives compartment.
“Oof, I dun wanna do that again.” Sweetiebelle shook her head. “Loop de loops and spells do not mix.”
“It looks like we have it, there's no one in front of us and the rest are just now making the turn. Save that annoying Guard.” Sombra huffed.
Comet Trail held onto the chain still wrapped around the spoiler. He let out a few lengths of chain giving himself some slack before he braced again and yanked hard shooting Dinky's cart through the draft of the larger metal cart and around the left side like a sling shot, moving ahead of Sweetiebelle and Sombra before he threw his end of the chain out to wrap around a pole at the edge of the course.
There was a hard jerk as the chain went taught, though Sombra's construction won out as it ripped the pole from the ground, though the sudden jerk slowed them enough that the heavy cart rolled to a stop a length from the finish line as Dinky's cart shot across it taking the checkered flag.
“Drat.” Sombra grumbled.
Rahs and Spike shot past along with the rest of the racers, the dragon taking second and a colt from Hoofington taking third.
“Double drat. “ Sombra grumbled.
“Hehffhfhhhfhhfhhh.” Rahs raspy laughed from the finish line, as Spike stopped the cart. The vehicle had only just come to a complete stop when it fell apart entirely, the parts scattering everywhere leaving the pair sitting on the seats which were now on the ground.
Spike looked at the steering wheel in his claws before tossing it aside. ”Well, at least we placed second before it broke.”
“So you were the secret sponsor working with Red Bull?” Spike asked glancing up from his second place winnings. A crystalline typewriter thing that was called a 'laptop' on the box.
“Yup, Saturnia and I set up an LLC and have a number of changelings putting together devices like this. We've got Aria and Jynx adding to the support.” Sunset explained sitting across the table from Spike. The pony turned human turned pony again was now back to human and was wearing a rather short red dress that showed off her legs and a low cut top that did the same for her cleavage. She and Rahs had a date tonight and she had suggested a few times for him to wear the suit. “What you and the other winners got were prototypes. Dinky and Comet got the bigger box's that had two desk top and routers, with the pony hoof designed keyboards. You and Rahs got the lap tops designed for those who have fingers and that colt and his dad got the tablets. All of them set up to the crystal network, all with plenty of instructions. I had two sets for each type made just in case. ”
“And you put all this as prizes in a school derby race?” Spike questioned.
“Yup. See here's the thing. There's a book series I found I liked in the human world and the author had a nice line that I'm stealing, cause it's true. “Sunset smirked.” Any technology that is in the world when you are young, is just the way of things and is how the world works, any technology that comes out in your teens or young adult hood is new and exciting and something you want to get into as soon as possible, and any technology that comes out after you hit middle age is evil and horrible and needs to be destroyed. I couldn't market this to adults.”
Spike raised an eyebrow at that, considered and shrugged. “Yeah that tracks. So you get the kids super invested in it and they drag their parents kicking and screaming or if the parents hate it the kids are more interested. Devious.”
“Thank you.” Sunset chuckled.” It will also set up a number of jobs provided I can get the training books set up for classes. So far Aria and I are the only ones with the back ground in order to make this. And given it's all different it's a whole new field.
“Interesting as well to see you have managed to draw most of those after Rahs into your little circle save Applejack and Trixie.” Spike offered narrowing his eyes as he stared at the girl over the top of the crystal screen.
“Wasn't intentional, but Saturnia has the hoof power I needed needed to get the net work up fast, Jynx has the easy supply of rare crystals, and Aria knows more than I do about some of this stuff. Applejack refused, she's still a bit hidebound, and Trixie..... “ Sunset trailed off. “She's more dangerous than I gave her credit for. So I want to keep her at arms length. She not only managed to become a biped thus fitting into Rahs' preference, but she also managed to get bigger tits than any one other than Jynx and Applejack. Add that to the she 's still a child hood friend turned romantic partner and she's become a bigger threat than any of the others, and she doesn't even need to team up.
“I did warn you all. There's a reason she's my pick.” Spike grinned.” And that was a choice made long before she became Dragon Lord.”
[Canterlot Castle]
Princess Luna raised an eyebrow as a pair of ponies stormed into her Night Court.
Not like she was doing anything aside being bored and plotting her next trip out as Mare-Do- Well. It had been a bit since she had gone super heroing. The ability to mask up and met out proper justice where no slick lawyer or friend in a high place can get one out of having their flank kicked for doing something wrong, was a some what addictive one.
It was either that or she would head out to a club again in her 'Selene' disguise. Not that it was much of a disguise, she simply hid her horn or her wings or both depending on the day, set an illusion or clothing over her cutie mark and made her hair white. She wasn't as tall as Celestia so most didn't even get suspicious of her.
Granted the clubs came with some issues. While she enjoyed herself, she was hit on my mares and colts, as well as the occasional other species. While she was flattered, she had no interest in anything non pony, this included Nox-cal as she couldn't help see them as her foals. And while she had some interest in Shining Armor and Big Mac as well as the occasional other stallion when she returned, she found she had issues getting close to any stallions because of her past, so she had been leaning much more towards mares with some of her liaisons. None had held her attention past a night or two of debauchery, but they knew that going into it.
She pulled herself from her musing to look at the pair stomping up.
“I am in need of my old room for a few days.” Sombra stated simply.
“More like a few weeks. It's a good thing it's summer break soon.” Sweetiebelle huffed.
“Do not complain, you at least can stay in your own room for a time at your own house away from her.” Sombra offered.
“While we are not against it …. why?” Luna questioned looking at the two taking note Sweetiebelle seemed to be wearing something that looked like a leather jacket.
“Rarity was less than happy when she found out we raided her leather stash to make costumes for the Apple Wood Derby. “Sweetiebelle sighed. “I mean it's not like she has a hard time getting it now with her deal with Jynx, but oh no, we touched it without asking.... She wasn't even home too ask and wouldn't be until AFTER the race.”
“Ahh the classic tis better to ask forgiveness than permission.” Luna nodded.
“In any event we should need a place to lay low for a time.” Sombra offered trailing off before his ears shot up, swiveling to a wall. He cursed and grabbed Sweetiebelle vanishing in a flash of teleportation.
Luna blinked, her own ears perking as a wall in the throne room exploded inward and a massive six wheeled cart of metal and Apple Wood rolled into the room with countless little arms of shadow and eyes pushing it to stop before the throne.
A pony shaped shadow of eyes and teeth sat in the drivers seat of the metal monstrosity.
“Princess Darling I'm sorry for the interruption.... and the wall. “Nightmarity asked charmingly. “ Have you seen my little sister and Sombra, I would like to have words.”
“Not really. It's just that it's zap apple season, and I tend to get in the way. I cost them a bit of a harvest a while ago and I've done my best to stay away since, though it's not exactly easy to resist if I'm there. I'll bring you a jar you'll see what I mean. Besides it's been a bit since I've come by to just visit. Still a lot of things about moon dogs I don't know.“
“So says the god of moon dogs.”
“You know what I mean. I've been raised by ponies.“
“Seems to have done well by you. Given how many are seeking to be your mate.”
“They're gonna kill me is what's gonna happen there.”
“Only if you don't give them pups. The big one seem very insistent on that. Not the blonde big one the other one of the two.”
“Two big ones? There's four of them bigger than me now, and one of them can change to be bigger than me. And the smallest one likes to burn things.”
“ HAH sounds like fun. Should I tell you want I've heard they dream about?”
“Ah stars, please no.”
“Lets just say I've been talking with those who watch their dreams since I still can't keep an eye on you or the other Sparkles directly and all I have to say about what I've heard is, Woof.”
“Please tell me I'm not related to any of them who are watching their dreams.”
“Not directly no. Not in a way that would matter to pony sensibilities any way.”
“There is that at least.”
“Most of them are mated anyway, though Azure is single, but she's terrified of your sister and Bri said no, so no worries about another after you.”
“Should I ask which one you support?”
“Pfft why would I chose. You like them all, go for them all. Not like a pack with a single male is odd here or for the ponies going by your brother there. Plus seeing as some are already teaming up to get you, all you need to do is hold on a bit to see if all of them will team up at once to jump you.”
“Seriously?”
“What I'm an old dog who loves his wife, but I will happily live vicariously through my son.”
“You've been talking to Nightlight again haven't you?”
“Hey I watch his dreams, and the Princess showed him how to be a lucid dreamer. We chat.”
Rahs grumbled as Cosma chuckled.
“Not listening to Granny's story?”
“Nope.”
“Yeah Ah spect you'll hear it a few times. Granny loves bringing it up, specially with ya'll being a new attentive audience.”
“Eeyup.”
“Was the Zap Apple harvest like this when you were growing up?”
“Eeyup.”
Witch-Jack sighed glancing over at Bright Mac. The pair of them staring at a group of zap apple trees waiting for them to hit the right level of ripeness before they could gather them.
“Well. Ah see where Mac gits it.”
“Yer tha one asking nothing but yes or no questions.” Bright Mac smirked.
Witch-Jack laughed.” Fair enough.”
Sunset looked over the papers before her with a small hum. Big Mac stood nearby letting his 'cousin' go over his work.
"I'm actually impressed every time I look at your stuff Mac." Sunset shook her head. "It didn't take you any time at all to rework several contracts to vendors after the whole Rich tragedy. You're actually making more money now off cider and jam sales than ever before."
"Eeyup." Big Mac nodded.
Sunset nodded and looked out at the field from under the tent. This whole thing was a little weird in truth. The Zapp apples had the rules and requirements on them that spoke of a very potent ritual, likely something built up over years and years to get to this point. The first year she was here Granny had made sure that Sunset knew to follow the rules she laid out on the farm if she was going to help.
No magic was allowed during the harvest and certain things needed to be observed. No using doors on the first day, every one had to climb out the windows. No bathing the second day unless there were at least 2 apples of differing varieties with you and you spent at minimum twenty minutes in the tub. The third day there was no ingesting of any apple product.
The list went on with some days not allowing or forcing you to do certain things by the hour. The whole family went along with it like it was nothing, Sunset was still surprised that there wasn't a blood sacrifice somewhere in it. And that was before the requirements for the water, the odd jar testing and the proper placement of buckets.
It was also rather odd that Witch-Jack appearing due to all the magic in the air didn't change the pattern or the way of things. It was kind of a surprise that nothing had been messed up all the years that others helped.
And Sunset still hadn't figured out what Granny meant by saying , the Zap Apples showed up when they wanted. Given there had been two harvests this year already and only one last year both at odd times for any sort of harvest only added to the saying.
It was also odd that Granny was telling some story about Applejack putting the whole family in the hospital and Pear Butter and Applebloom were eating it up despite how embarrassed the giant fluffy magic devouring monster was getting because of it before she stormed off.
Sunset sighed and shook her head with a smile. She hadn't exactly had any sort of family interaction like this before.
It was nice.
Maybe one day when Celestia got her head out of her ass they could do something.
[?]
Solomon sat back on the couch and let his head fall back stretching his spine a bit. He could feel the neck of this latest body tear a little , the icor making up it's blood seeping out. He would need a new one soon, depending on the results from Diamond Tiara he might be able to grow a body that lasted longer, eventually one that he could fully inhabit.
The easiest way would be to take a demi god child before their third birthday. He could simply overlay his personality onto the foals and take over. That had been the plan with Sombra, but even under his control the damn mare interfered and he missed the window he needed. Though he did find raising a son amusing, in the end the lack of control he had over the colt proved his undoing however, and it put him further into the debt of his master and made him a revenent.
Solomon sighed. He hated times like this, quiet moments that gave him time to reflect, to look back and see the mistakes he made. He should have turned Luna first in secret and then ensnared Celestia when she was at her lowest with her sister fighting her. With his own clear involvement Celestia simply became angry and she had a goal , but she was kept at bay by the control he had over Luna. And that kept others at bay giving him the freedom to do what he wanted for a few years.
All of it was ruined by the whims of the foal he should have used as a new body. Though he thought he had the time back then, he was still in the body he was born in and was still young by most standards.
Ah well the past was the past and he had to look forward to the future. Provided his two newest minions could get what he sent them to get the next step was clear. If he couldn't create a body that would hold up, he needed to steal one. Sadly he was attached to the pony form or he would have had plenty of chances for a demi god body, as most gods were rather prolific. It was a small wonder the world wasn't overflowing with demi gods. There were certainly a lot, but given they were kill-able that likely kept the population down.
He had an idea to go after the newborns of the crystal empire, it would have been fitting in truth, but given how protected they were he didn't expect his chances being very good to even get close to them, and that was before they were confirmed gods and thus useless.
Changelings were a difficult obstacle to overcome when they were on the defensive. Any pony, rock, or end table could have been an infiltrator watching those two.
Foals of the god of changelings and the goddess of love.
Even he had to admit that the eldest Sparkle was a lucky stallion. Granted the group chasing the moon dog had some nice ones as well, though the bipedal nature of some of them was a turn off, and he had no interest in the dogs. Celestia's daughter and the changeling Princess though, not to mention the other Siren, though he liked the blue one before she became dragon lord.
Ah well, not his issue, but it did show that there was something about the Sparkles. He was amazed the dragon only had the one filly after him, though perhaps that was untrue and others who were interested simply hadn't shown themselves. He hadn't paid much attention to the youngest aside from what Diamond Tiara had told him. He could almost see Diamond Tiara pining for him, only to refuse to admit it.
Perhaps she would get what she wanted, though he hoped the girl wasn't as trite as to fall into that old trope.
Still his interest was fully on Twilight Sparkle. Goddess of magic.... what a power that would be. And if his theories were correct, well, he would know exactly what it would be like to control that.
Chrysalis sighed.“The twins set Shining on fire again.”
Cadence shook her head.” I'll go get the hose.
Tempest and Twilight stared at the sky and more importantly the massive black spot that hid the sun from them leaving the pair in a cone of darkness.
Tempest stepped to the side, leaving the cone and stepping out into the sunshine before walking around the cone curiously noting it surrounded Twilight in five feet in all directions.
“Right is this a prank or a boon given how hot it is today?” Tempest asked as Twilight shrugged.
“SPIKE!!!!!!” Rainbow Dash screamed out flinging the fathers day card at the cackling drake as he ran off a cone of darkness around him.” Will you stop it with this joke!”
“Only when it stops being funny.” Spike called back.
Twilight Sparkle frowned as she raised her head from her book, her ears perked up and her wings fluttered lightly. The faint sound of bird song could be heard out side the window at the side of the library, and the faint odor of this mornings breakfast still filled the main room, only subdued by the scent of books which permeated her library..
It was quiet in the crystal tree.
Too quiet.
A quick shield around herself and a few more moments waiting resulted in nothing happening, though Twilight didn't relax as she ran through possible problems that could arise.
Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were not likely to be a issue, the pair were off for a class reunion in Cloudsdale.
Pinkie Pie had gone along with them as well.
Twilight wasn't going to ask about that as Pinkie hadn't asked for a cloud walking spell.
[Cloudsdale]
"HOW ARE YOU EVEN UP HERE !?" shouted a burly brown pegasus who until the moment he was walloped with a rubber chicken had been teasing 'Rainbow Crash' and 'Fluttershit' with his two buddies,the trio had flanked Pinkie and forced her back against a wall. Something the pink earth pony didn't seem to have issues with.
"Nunyah!" Pinkie Pie offered with a smirk as she leaned back against the cloud wall with a grin before slapping the pony with the rubber chicken again when he moved closer.
"That's not an answer." the second stallion growled.
"Actually most people learn not to ask when I do stuff." Pinkie shrugged and smacked him with the chicken to.
"Grah stupid dirt pony, I'm gonna throw you off the edge and see how fast you fall!." he growled as his buddies nodded." It's gonna take a lot more than a stupid toy to save you from interrupting my fun."
"Boneless isn't a toy, he's a friend, besides I don't need to do anything. I've got a G."
"A what?" the third stallion asked.
"A G." Pinkie nodded.
"What the fuck is a G?" the first stallion asked.
The stallion was suddenly grabbed and whirled around on the spot to be nose to beak with a very large and very angry griffon hen who had seen said stallion bullying her friend, her sorta friend, and Fluttershy. A griffon hen who really hadn't even wanted to come to this stupid pony gathering, but had her claw forced but had been bored the whole time thus far.
"A G. As in a Gilda." Gilda growled and proceeded to show the stallions that they should learn some proper manners when talking with old classmates who did better than they did in life.
Pinkie broke out a camera to film it for the reunion scrap book.
Twilight frowned deeper, no, there were no issues from that side. Though she was certain that she might have to post bail for one of them.
Again.
Probably Fluttershy though there was no point in betting on that because of how safe the odds were.
Who else could be an issue?
Rarity and Sombra had taken a cruise with Rarity saying Sombra needed to get out of his comfort zone.
She didn't expect that to end well.
[Seaward Shoals]
The Bunyip poked it's head out of the water, raising an eyebrow at the commotion going on on the ship it had been curious about. A number of smaller ships had zipped up to it while it was in deep water and the crew of the smaller vessels climbed aboard the larger one, harassing the crew and robbing the passengers.
The Bunyip had seen this sort of thing before, ponies called them pirates and some times he would go help the ones attacked, not today though.
Mostly because of the mass of shadow tendrils and a number of black crystals that were sprouting from the craft, flailing about thrashing the pirates and destroying the smaller ships turning them into splinters. Meanwhile someone on deck was screaming to 'look at her as she was the captain now'.
The Bunyip was going no where near that mess.
Twilight considered she might have to post bail for them as well. Or send out a search party. Still they would be some one elses problem for a time.
Rahs was not around either as he and Applejack had gone out hunting in the Everfree and likely wouldn't be back for a while. Aside from the killing of small game that should be peaceful and calm for the pair.
Rahs and Applejack stared at the glowing rift that had opened before them before they looked at each other and Applejack sighed.
"Well. Ah don't think this is from yer drama powers at least." Applejack sighed.
"Bork?" Rahs questioned.
"Nah ah ain't betting that Twi said something. Too easy."
A figure took that moment to emerge from the portal, it had a pink bird like head with spiraled dragon horns, arms from a lion like Abyssinia, legs of a chicken and a feathered tail reminiscent of a peacock with bat wings. It wore a regal looking purple robe and carried a staff with a glowing crystal on top.
"BWAHAHAHA after tend thousand years I'm free, it's time to conqur..... wait where am I?"
[Everfree Forest]
“Well least she ain't here cause she wants yah as a concubine or whatever.” Applejack snarked as Rahs rolled his eyes.
"Oh bother." Discord stated as he popped up behind the pony and moon dog. "It's you."
"Discord? So I broke through to your paltry dimension HA, this is going to be far too easy."
"Wuff?" Rahs asked.
"She's my sorta sister Eris. It's a dimensional thing with a bit of timey whimy bullshit. She's basically me from another plane." Discord sighed. "White and I encountered her when I was screwing around one eon and that's why he banned me from time travel."
"An yer following a ban?" Applejack raised an eyebrow.
"It's a fair cop." Discord shrugged.
"Shut up you buffoon. Useless prankster, you can't even use chaos properly. Pranks? Pff, chaos is meant to cause destruction." Eris snarled, her eyes snapping to the only non god in the area ." And what better way to start than by using the locals to start it."
Discord blinked then narrowed his eyes.
"No. Stop. Don't." Discord dead panned.
Rahs raised an eyebrow at Discord and held himself back a second to see where this was going, though he had a good idea.
Eris jabbed the staff at Applejack, booping her nose and unleashing a glut of chaos power into the pony.
What Eris had hoped to do was unknown, what actually happened was every drop of power she put out was eaten and she was left with a now very large and angry Witch-Jack.
The female draconequus barely had time to question what had happened before Witch-Jack had lept on her and started using Eris as a large screaming chew toy.
Nothing could happen just from a hunt for squirrels right?
The Crusaders were some one elses problem right now too as they were at that Convention up in the Crystal Empire with Fireball keeping an eye on them.
She was pretty sure Spike was having fun at least.
[Crystal Empire]
The Kirin frowned a little looking through the rule book as the Hippogryph with the issue looked over his shoulder into the rule book as they searched for the ruling on this particular play.
The purple dragon causing the issue sat across the table with a wide grin on his face.
The hippogryph had set up a strategy for his Battle Mallet team he had all his units in reserve due to a rule wording that allowed him to force the other play to deploy fully without a single unit of his on the field. Once the opponent had a deployment he could put his units down in position to exploit any weak points. It was a grief tactic but one that was legal.
The dragon he was against however, deployed a mass of scouts and spread them out to the limit of the unit cohesion , lining them up in a way that covered the entire possible deployment zone for the Hippogryph. Which meant that the Hippogryph could not deploy his units and automatically lost before the first round of the tourney.
The Kirin judge sighed not finding a single rule to prevent either tactic in the last ten minutes of digging through the rules. He waved it off marked the win for the dragon and wandered off to find a less stupid match to judge.
Spike would be gone until Tuesday with the crusaders, and Rahs would be back later that night.
The scent of his cleaning his catches would be annoying, but she was long used to the smell, and maybe he would cure some of it for bacon.
Mmmm Bacon.
[ Everfree Forest]
"AHHH! NO! HELP! AIIIEEEEEEEEEE GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!!!" Eris screamed out from between the growls and sounds of violence.
"This seems familiar."
Discord nodded in agreement wincing a little.
Twilight considered other interruptions of her day.
Then there were Starlight and Tempest, though they along with Trixie had gone up to Canterlot for something and probably wouldn't be back to bother her for a while, not that she really minded any of them but Trixie, and even she wasn't much of an issue unless Rahs was around.
[East of Hallow Shades]
“Why the fuck did I agree to this!?” Starlight screamed out as she flashed away in a teleportation as the massive rock troll smashed the ground where she had been. The mare reappeared on the other side of the stone creature panting hard. The purple mare was dressed in a dark purple suit that made her rather self aware of how she really needed to exercise more, a black mask a dark cape with a wide brimmed hat. She looked like a comic book hero.
The troll roared spinning towards her before a massive ax slammed into the side of it's head knocking a large chunk out of the stone creature and causing it to stagger to the side.
“HUZZAH!” Princess Luna cried out, the mare decked out in battle armor as she lept into the fray, her ax knocking chunks out of the rock monster with every strike, but doing little more than pissing it off.
The troll roared and whirled suddenly slamming it's bunched fists down on Luna the ground cratering from the impact.
“Sorry monster, but that was the wrong choice.” another voice called out and another Luna faded into view before splitting into fifteen others and darting in and hacking at the creature, though only one ax seemed to be doing damage.
“As much as the great and powerful Dragon Lord Trixie's former teacher doesn't need the help. Trixie shall not allow you to turn her into paste so easily.” Trixie bellowed from above, fanning her wings where she stood in the air far above the fight.
Starlight cried out again firing a blast of magic that rocked the troll's head back before running off before the creature knew where she was at.
She, Trixie, Grubber, and Tempest had come up to Canterlot as Trixie and Tempest wanted to try out a place that Rahs and Twilight had mentioned had good food. After ward they would do something else and Starlight had a few ideas to suggest, even if she wasn't quite used to having friends. They had met Princess Luna instead and been pulled into a quest to deal with a rock troll that had been bothering a small community near the Foal Mountains.
Add onto that that Princess Luna somehow convinced Starlight to wear this ridiculous' mare-Do-Well outfit, saying something about that she wanted an alibi. Starlight had no idea what that was about but wasn't going to argue with a Princess, particularly not one carrying an ax bigger than she was.
“We're in position.” Tempest called, her voice sounding through the crystal com unit on Starlight's ear. “Clear the area.”
One of the Lunas broke off and Starlight teleported again as the nothing Trixie was standing on faded into view as a rather large airship. One with ten guns on the side now facing the rock troll.
“FIRE!” Tempest shouted with Grubber cackling on the line behind her.
The ship roared as the rock troll was broadsided with a full salvo, the rock creature roaring out as the explosions hammered it breaking the massive creature apart shattering the creature into sand.
“I just wanted to fly kites!” Starlight screamed against the roar of explosions.
Twilight might need to look into those three's friendship later. Two were former villains and Trixie was a bad influence at best.
Rahs really needed to watch it around that one. Trixie clearly was insane.
[Everfree Forest]
“ARRRGH IT”S NOT SUPPOSED TO BEND THAT WAY!!!”
“Wuff?”
“Yup almost word for word repeat of what I said. My screaming was more manly though.”
Sunset, Saturnia and Aria were working on the lines further up towards Manehatten. Sunset's Crystal network was in high demand after it was shown how useful it was to link Canterlot and the Crystal Empire. Currently Ponyville was the main hub that all the lines branched out from, though the goal was to eventually put it up in Canterlot proper before branching it out across Equestria and further. The idea of a remote teaching aid was something impressive to Twilight. Pity it was taking so long to set everything up, but the crystals needed in the tower had to be built and shaped perfectly. Basic communication and cat pictures aside, the crystal net was still in it's infancy. Though she wondered why everyone had done their best to steer her away from that 4 whatever site. Spike and Rahs had even parental locked their new computers to prevent her from looking at it.
[ Up North a bit]
“STOP!”
SLAM.
“EATING!”
SLAM.
“MY TOWERS!”
SLAM.
Sunset and Saturnia watched as a full sized Aria bodied the dragon that had torn down two of the towers they were there to fix in order to eat the crystals at the top of them. The siren in full form out massed the dragon by three fold and was currently trying to bury the battered drake into the nearest boulder. This was the third boulder she had tried to fit him in and it wasn't holding up any better than the other two had.
“You gonna correct her?” Saturnia asked.
“Well technically she did design the structure, so I'm not gonna nitpick.” Sunset offered.
“Uh huh.” Saturnia hummed. “So do we sick her on Trixie or try to bring her into our agreement for Rahs?”
“Still thinking on that.” Sunset shrugged as the third boulder shattered.
She briefly wondered if there would be an issue today with the Diamond Dogs, but with Rahs out of the house Jynx likely wouldn't be by. Rarity had mentioned Jynx had something going on out by Las- Pegasus.
Twilight was curious about that , maybe she would ask about it next time she saw Jynx.
[Las-Pegasus]
Gladmane swallowed hard one hoof lifted to part the blinds as he looked out the window at the massive construction project going on next door to his casino.
Some one had purchased nearly every property around his place that was for sale, and made offers on things that were not. In the last month old buildings were tone down and something was being built that seemed to be all crystal and stone.
The sign out front of it had read ' Future site of the Sparkling Crystal Casino and resort.
He stared at the site watching the diamond dogs and others swarm over the structure, his eyes locking onto one massive black furred dog that stood with her arms crossed staring at him as he peeked out the window.
Every time he looked at the place he saw her staring back at him. No matter where he went or what window he looked out of , she was there staring at him.
He had even looked through the crystal security cameras and she still managed to be in every one of them glaring at him.
Gladmane let go of the blinds with a shudder feeling the over whelming dread set in as that Diamond Dog was doing exactly what she said she was going to.
Twilight glanced back down at her book. Carefully not thinking about Discord.
[Everfree Forest]
“Screw you guys! I'm going home!”
Eris managed to pull free of the mauling throwing herself through another portal that snaps shut with a air of finality.
Witch- Jack growls glancing around looking for where her chew toy went before she looked back at Rahs and Discord, her ears flattening to her head and her tail lashing with a bit of a butt wiggle to it as she crouched down.
Rahs blinked then sighed Pulling off his coat and tossing it over a tree branch.
“Wuff.”Rahs offered clutching a rose between his teeth.
“You don't have to tell me twice.” Discord snapped vanishing with a pop as Witch Jack tackled Rahs.
Twilight blinked as she heard heavy hoof falls on the floor, looking up as Big Mac sauntered in. She grinned pushing herself out of her seat moving over to greet him draping her wing over his side as she nuzzles against him.
“Finished up on the farm today?” Twilight asked.
“Eeyup.” Big Mac chuckled leaning down a bit to kiss her.” Yah free?”
“ Far as I know, no one else is around to bother me. And Seshat said she didn't feel anything from the table.“
“What about Princess Celestia?” Big Mac asked.
Twilight blinked.” THAT'S what was bothering me today. She's due a counter attack soon after today's prank.”
Big Mac raised an eyebrow at that.
“T'days prank?” Big Mac asked as Twilight cackled.
[Canterlot]
Princess Celestia pushed open the door and poked her head inside.
Hall closet on the third floor.
She pulled her head back with a frown walking over to her closet door and opening it.
Main entrance to the east garden.
She closed the door walking over to the bathroom door of her room looking inside.
Lower chamber where she hid all the books she didn't want Twilight to read in a secret chamber with a giant snake guarding it.
She closed the door and frowned, opening it again to find it led out to the water garden on the east side of the castle now.
She opened and closed the door a few times.
Broom closet, kitchen pantry, ball room two, Luna's gaming room, the guard barracks shower room, the medical closet in the southern wing.
Celestia closed the door with a huff and grumbled. Twilight's prank had every door in the castle leading some where else. A Guard had opened the door to her room this morning certain he was headed into the armory. Several maids had popped up to, only when Celestia opened her door after they backed away it lead some where else.
Pinkie Pie sat on the couch, remaining calm, cool, collected and most importantly silent.
That was the big thing.
She also did her best not to show fear.
They could smell fear.
Angel bunny sat in her lap, the exact same thoughts and motions going through his head. Like Pinkie Pie his eyes were all that moved save the occasional twitch of his ear, their gazes focusing on who was speaking at the moment.
From the outside nothing seemed to be going on just a calm discussion between Fluttershy and her parents.
Pinkie had met Fluttershy's parents on several occasions and thought they liked her, but she didn't want to push her luck.
Fluttershy's mother was a beautiful yellow coloration much like her daughter, with a mane and tail much the same yellow if a slight shade darker than her coat.
She was also built like she wrestled ursas in her spare time. Her personality was forceful and strong, though she had obvious soft spots for her husband and children any one else who annoyed here was in trouble.
She had give Pinkie Pie the shovel speech when she had first started dating Shy. A speech in which she had taken a bite out of said shovel, chewed the metal into scrap, and then tied it into a noose with her tongue all while not breaking eye contact with Pinkie Pie.
Reminded her of her dad meeting Maud's first colt friend.
Her father was by far worse.
He was a frail looking teal stallion with bright pink hair like Fluttershy, though he kept it cut to shoulder length. With his soft spoken voice and calm demeanor it was clear who Fluttershy had taken more after, that he had a love of animals as well was likely where Fluttershy had gotten her obsession.
He was also well documented by the Cloudsdale branch of the Guard and was the second page on their training manual in big red lettering with standing orders to not antagonize. Most of the Guards still had nightmares after a small sect of Squall Masons had demanded the foals at Fluttershy's daycare be tested. This usually was by flinging the foals off the cloud to ensure they were of proper pegasi superiority and the ones that were not were removed. The squall Masons had been on the decline at the time, but there was enough that this sort of this still happened occasionally when some of them got over zealous.
Oddly the six Squall Masons found they were not proper pegasi very shortly after Fluttershy's father got there before the Guards. Though that might have had something to do with them being tossed off a cloud, while their wings were still on the cloud. Afterward their headquarters in the area burned to ash in a fire that disrupted air currents for days. Cloudsdale had soon after set up a fire department as before that point no one knew clouds could burn.
With several thousand years of pegasi history not having ever seen it either.
Angel twitched slightly and Pinkie Pie tightened her smile as Fluttershy's mother turned away from the very quiet, if heated argument between Fluttershy and her father and focused on them.
“I understand you may have some issue with Zephy, but I will ask that you two be nice to him. He is going through some tougher times. A stay in Ponyville might be good for him.”
Pinkie simply nodded doing her best not to say 'again'. Why couldn't it have been Bishie staying for a while, Fluttershy's youngest brother took more after their mother despite still being soft spoken like her father. It was a combination that evidently had him swarmed by love struck fillies in school. Poor colt was clueless about why everyone was so nice to him.
Angel bunny also nodded.
Fluttershy's mother stared at the bunny more than Pinkie Pie.
Angel gulped and nodded quicker.
Pinkie Pie knew that Fluttershy was going to lose the argument. She wasn't aggressive enough to argue with her mother, and her father always managed to convince her of things. It seemed Zephyr Breeze was coming to Ponyville for a while.
She needed to make sure the Cakes would still let her stay in the loft.
Oh no! She needed to warn Dashie, and Rarity, and Twilight and...
Pinkie Pie froze doing her best not to change how wide her grin was.
No. She wouldn't warn any one, least of all Zephyr.
Pinkie Pie lifted her head slightly over the bottom of the window sil peering into the house. Her eyes shifted left, then right before she sank back down under the sil.
Another window on the second floor slowly developed a Pinkie Peeper before that one too was vacated.
A third window suddenly had a slow rising Pinkie Pie before the mare's target was spotted sitting on the couch staring into space.
Pinkie slipped in through the window, ducking completely behind a lamp before leaning out and tip hooving over to hide behind a chair.
Angel Bunny frowned and looked down as Pinkie Pie appeared under his bed. He reached down and swatted at the mare who quickly put his bed back down and offered him a head pat before she dove behind the couch her target sat on.
Peering up over the back of the couch she reached over it and set a box on the cushion next to her target before diving back down.
Her target looked at the box, opened it and then upended the entire content of chocolates into her mouth in much the same way Pinkie did.
Pinkie Pie winced and decided not to call her out on table manners like was done to her.
“Sooo feeling better?” Pinkie Pie asked still hiding behind the couch.
“Grumble grumble grumble.”
“Did you just say 'Grumble grumble grumble? Cause that was adorable.” Pinkie Pie squeed
Pinkie Pie was cut off as she was grabbed and pulled into a murderous hug by her mare friend. Well it would be a murderous hug for most, Pinkie was used to Fluttershy's bad day hugs even if they sometimes made her head blow up a little from the squeezing.
“I take it you don't need an air tight alibi just yet?” Pinkie Pie asked.
“It wouldn't matter everyone would still suspect me.” Fluttershy sighed, fangs being bared before they sank into Pinkie's mane chewing on it.
“So how has it gone?”
“Day one, he made himself at home. I know mom did his laundry before he came here and how a pony who doesn't wear anything can have that many dirty clothes to string around in less than a day confounds me. He's already managed to anger nearly all my critters, which in a way is fairly good because some of them who should have gone back to the forest but were sticking around for a handout have left. But...Harry is going to be missing for a week because Angel Bunny had to punt him to keep him from mauling Zephyr.”
“Really? He managed to annoy HARRY? That bear is still Angel's friend after years of Angel being Angel.” Pinkie Pie gasped.
Angel Bunny bounced a half eaten carrot off Pinkie's head though he was ignored.
“He's managed to eat everything in the refrigerator and some how come up with a number of excuses about everything.”Fluttershy sighed. “ He still doesn't understand why I'm pissed off that he made PETA, because it's supposed to help animals. He won't even listen when I try to tell him WHY PETA is bad. Claiming I'm over blowing it and that's all just rumors, despite the fact he knows PETA is in bad shape financially due to all the Parasprite payouts.”
“Want me to ask Gummy's mom to explain it to him?” Pinkie Pie smirked.
“No.... He is my brother and he did... try? He just followed through with the wrong thing. Evidently in a few months there should be enough in donations for him to get his penthouse again. Though he plans to rebuild the main HQ in Wilmingtrot rather than Manehatten due to some 'local misunderstandings' as he put it.”
“Should we torch the place now or....” Pinkie Pie frowned.
“ARRRGH I don't know, if we do he'll be stuck here longer, but allowing those idiots to get another hoof hold.....” Fluttershy grumbled. “I suggested he get another job like mane styling, I bet Aloe and Lotus could use some one else to help with hair. Grubber is really good but he's over worked with how popular he's gotten with makeup and hair. And that used to be a thing Zephyr did.”
“You would subject those two to him? I thought you liked Aloe and Lotus.” Pinkie Pie chided.
“I do which is why I didn't though I'm pretty sure those two could keep him in line or break him in half. Aloe is dating that Kitsune that opened up Lei Ho Foxes and that guy has some rather dim views of any one flirting with her as well as a penchant for very mean pranks to those that anger him. “Fluttershy offered. ”Maybe Lotus could tolerate him?”
“Lotus swings for the other team.” Pinkie Pie pointed out. “She's dating one of the Kirin guards, she's adorable. Smol and vicious in one package.”
“Mmm .” Fluttershy nodded gnawing on Pinkie Pie's mane more, it always tasted of fruit and sugar. Something she really only noticed once she was changed. Something Zephyr hadn't even noticed.
“So where is he now?”
“He claimed he needed some air and he went wandering in Ponyville.” Fluttershy sighed.
Pinkie Pie was silent for a moment.
“Think posting bail will be pricey?” Pinkie Pie offered.
“If Spike would have allowed me to bet on what happens to him, I could afford it.” Fluttershy huffed.
“Families not allowed to bet on family now.” Fluttershy chided. ”That includes pets. ”
Angel Bunny grumbled about that damn raccoon Blakeney ruining everything.
[On a distant airship]
“What did we have left?” Squall questioned, the big yeti grumbling a little as he looked down at the small village they were descending towards.
“We've got a letter to drop off and a couple of packages to pick up. Evidently he's got a PO box out here.” Adagio offered. The siren, turned human, turned pony was currently in her human form, evidently thinking she was teasing the yeti by walking around nude or half nude most of the time.
The joke was on her, while he might normally be interested, being dead put a fair sized damper on any hot blooded antics.
Not that he didn't look.
He was dead, not dead.
At the moment she was wearing something she called a sundress, and only the sundress claiming wearing anything under it was a waste of a good sundress.
“You might want to get changed, given where this place is they might not welcome anyone other than ponies here.” Squall offered adjusting the airship to come in for a water landing a good ways away from the docks and slowly coast up to them like a normal ship. ”I'm going to have to stay with the ship.”
It was less threatening this way and gave any one worried time to prepare so they were not as worried. The craft wasn't yeti design, but pirates were a thing.
Granted two pirate ships were no longer a thing, but that was because they were stupid and thought the little airship wasn't armed, when the thing was 10%quarters, 5% supplies, 10% airbag, 25% engine, and 50% cannon by volume.
Not to mention Squall was a very good pilot.
“Right.” Adagio grumbled already back into pony form , with her massive hair done up in a equally massive braid. The sundress all but vanished flashing a bit of plot to any one looking “You want anything from the shops while I'm out?”
“See if they have any of those cheesy corn chips.” Squall responded.
He was however, excessively lazy, doing his best to coast through life with as little effort as possible. This had him running a number of scams through the course of his life, everything from pyramid scams, which he dropped because of the work involved, running a non profit religion, which was shut down due to Luna taking offense to it when she got back. Church of the Moon might have been a little too spot on. And his latest thing had taken a bit more effort, but he had also been trying to please his older sister by doing something with animals. He wasn't sure why she had a thing against Ponies for the Ethical treatment of Animals, but he was never sure what would set her off.
His big sis was a rather temperamental and sorta violent mare.
As such he knew he had to get out of her house sooner rather than later. In the past he had found the easiest and most enjoyable way to do that was to hook up with a mare and crash at her place.
As such he had started with the mare that had the biggest house in town.
“.. So aside from being sexy what do you do for a living?” Zephyr smirked leaning with an foreleg propped up atop the desk the nerdy looking purple mare was sitting behind as she looked through a book. Zephyr was sure it wasn't anything interesting because it didn't have any pictures, what kind of book didn't have illustrations?
“Uh huh.” The purple mare countered in a dead pan tone like she had done for the last ten minutes. He had used all he good lines on her too and he was reaching the dregs. Which was a pity cause this girl had a wingspan on her. A horn too, but no one was perfect. Not that he had anything against unicorns, they had some fun tricks, but he was more interested in a buff pegasus.
He had a preferred type, so what?
Ooh the things he could show this one in the air...
The door to the massive library was pushed open and a large red Nox-cal strode in.
Zephyr glanced to him, and ignored the other patron only to glance back at the purple mare and find she was gone.
“Big Mac!?” Twilight smiled trotting up to the transformed Nox-cal Nocturne with a smile on her face. “I thought you were going to be busy with the spring planting today?”
“Eeyup.” Big Mac offered as Twilight hugged him.
Twilight blinked as she pulled her forelegs back, or tried to as she seemed to be stuck to him. Her eyes widened as Big Mac started to swell before exploding into a mass of jam that coated much of the library and soaked Twilight.
Zephyr blinked, poking his head out from behind the desk he had dove behind.
Twilight sat there with jam dripping down her form, before her eyes narrowed and the jam started to bubble and smoke as she growled.
“Oh that insufferable bitch.”
“ You know what, you look busy... I'll come back later.” Zephyr offered and quickly flew out of the room and out of the tree.
“How rude. He didn't even try to flirt with me.”Seshat huffed as Blakeney and Peewee ran up to the mess of jam with a pile of toast.
“What? You're a tree!” Twilight fussed.
“Well yes. But I identify as a girl, it's the principal of the thing.” Seshat grumbled.
“Babe, if you were words on a page , you'd be fine print.” Zephyr offered to the absolutely gorgeous white mare before him, then she turned to face him.
“Zephyr, what a pleasant surprise.” Rarity smiled, the grin going far far further up her face than it should have.
“Uhh.” Zephyr took a step back .
“You do recall what I said last time you were in town. And what I would do to your chance to ever have children if you called me 'babe' again right?” Rarity offered, her smooth lines and curves getting exceedingly more sharp and pointy as she spoke.
“Yeaaaah gotta go..” Zephyr took off remembering exactly what happened last time with Fluttershy's friend.
“Bye now.” Rarity offered sweetly.
Sombra stood by and watched this with a morbid fascination as he waited for Rarity to return to normal before trotting closer to ask what he was wondering.
“Babe?” Sombra questioned. ”Isn't that what small foals are called?”
“It is also the name of a very famous pig.” Rarity snarled.
“Ahhh.” Sombra nodded.
“BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!” Lily cackled.
“Oh, oh... he's serious.” Roseluck snorted.
“He is? Oh stars, let me laugh harder.” Daisy collapsed into giggles.
Zephyr frowned, his ears laid back to his head as the three mares fell over themselves laughing. That had been one of his best pickup lines too.
It was a rather sharp blow to his pride that these three had been laughing at how small and puny he was. He turned and stormed off as the three continued to lose their minds.
“Bye tiny!” Roseluck called sending all of them into another fit.
“Are you a magician? Because when I’m looking at you, you make everyone else disappear!” Zephyr grinned waggling his eyebrows at the wine colored mare.
Berry Punch stared at the stallion for a few moments, leaning on her mop as she rested outside her bar after cleaning up. She tilted her head a little looking him over before shrugging and upending her mop bucket over his head. She had heard better pick up lines working behind the bar.
Zephyr blinked from under the bucket on his head.
“Sooo is that a maybe?”
Walking out of the spa after getting his mane fixed, and getting the bill charged to his sister, she wouldn't mind. He was stopped by screaming.
Looking at the source he spotted a young dragon covered in what looked like jam that seemed like it had exploded everywhere around the street, there was also a big red bow stuck to the dragon's face.
After running out of air from screaming in horror, the jam colored dragon promptly fainted.
“This town is weird.” Zephyr muttered trotting on.
“Are you a broom? Because you’ve swept me off my feet!”
The gray furred mare in the blue smock stared at him.
Zephyr blinked thinking this one looked familiar.
“That was funny.”
“Um, thank you?” Zephyr blinked again.
“I am already seeing some pony.” Maud stated.
“Oh?”
“WHAT!?!” Pinkie Pie screamed out, bursting out of Zephyr's Mane and landing before her sister.
“GAH!” Zephyr yelped.
“Yes.” Maud stated pointing a hoof to the side.
Pinkie and Zephyr looked only to see a changeling sitting there looking at the pair with a little bit of worry at Pinkie Pie's glare.
“Hi.”
“WHAT!?” Pinkie Pie demanded.
“He makes me laugh.” Maud explained.
The changeling coughed into his hoof.
“Hilarious.” Maud intones.
“WHAT!?” Pinkie Pie stared.
“Oh hey Kevin.” Zephyr called to the changeling. ”Been a bit since I saw you. Sorry I didn't know she was spoken for by you man, grats.”
Zephyr offered a wave of his hoof which Kevin returns before the pegasus trots off.
“WHAT!?” Pinkie stresses.
“Something’s wrong with my eyes, because I can’t take them off you.” Zephyr offered.
The orange furred blonde maned mare raised an eyebrow at that. She then turned her attention to the curly orange maned and peach colored mare nearby who was waving a hoof at Zephyr.
“Ehh? Ehh?” Pear Butter gestured with a wide grin at the stallion.
“Nope.” Applejack huffed, pushed her hat down, and stomped off.
“Oh come on.” Pear Butter cried.
Zephyr shrugged and turned to start flirting with the pretty mare still before him only for a looming feeling of dread to cross over him. A slight glance to the side showed a massive yellow earth pony stallion with a red mane staring at him.
Bright Mac shook his head slightly, but clearly, no.
Zephyr quickly left the farm.
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAA!” Aria cackled like she had head the best joke ever.
Zephyr huffed and flew off. Mares in this town didn't know what they were missing.
Zephyr looked up at the massive towering form of the black furred Diamond dog.
Jynx stared down at him ears perked curiously.
Zephyr considered.
“Nope.” and flew off.
Jynx blinked not sure what that was all about.
“Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!” Zephyr smiled.
There was a titter next to him and Zephyr smiled. He had spotted the pink maned changeling mare a bit ago and had run right up to talk to her.
Changelings ate love right? He had plenty of that to go around, and what stallion wouldn't love a mare that could be anything he wanted.
He put out some good lines got a smile and was going right on with it.
Though when he looked back at her she was much shorter, and had on a rather bad pink wig.
Zephyr blinked looking around for the leggy pink changeling mare he had been talking with. He was pretty sure this one was a stallion.
“Uhh.” Zephyr uttered. “Maybe I should go...”
“No please stay you're so funny.” Bees offered in a very stuttered soprano as Zephyr ran off.
“Awww , now I'll never get a date to the prom.” Bees sighed twirling the strands of his pink wig around a hoof.
“Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.” Zephyr charmed.
The mulberry colored mare stared at him unmoving.
He wasn't sure he was getting through to this one. She was a rather fit unicorn mare though, couple of scars on her face, but ooh that was a nice flank, probably a Guard and he wasn't one to be put off by a little scaring, not with a body that nice.
The problem was that she hadn't said anything and was simply staring at him, it was getting a little unnerving.
“Huh... well... sorry to bother you then.” Zephyr sighed trotting off leaving the mare to stare after him.
Starlight trotted up to Tempest as the stallion left looking between him and her before sighing.
“You froze up didn't you?”
“He was flirting with me... I have no idea how to take that. I panicked.” Tempest stammered.
“Did better than me. He dropped a pick up line and I freaked out and teleported away.” Starlight sighed.” We are never gonna be able to help Trixie with her love life.”
Zephyr pulled his head out of the trashcan shaking loose the garbage from it before looking back across the street at the shop he had stopped in for a bite to eat.
Maybe it wasn't the best idea to hit on the counter mare when her husband was nearby.
For such a scrawny looking earth pony that yellow stallion had a heck of a throw.
“We’re not socks, but I think we’d make a great pair.” Zephyr flirted with the pretty blue furred mare. He wasn't sure if she was a pegasus or not as she had odd gossamer wings, but she was cute and bubbly and that was enough.
“Oh my gosh, are you flirting with me?” Sonata gasped hopping forward and grabbing Zephyr around the neck and hugging him tight enough to choke him.
“Eeeeeeeeeeee it's been so long since I had a boy friend. I completely forgot how to care for one. Do they like wet food or dry food? I remember I can't keep them in a carrier all the time, and I do remember that when I start eating you I need to begin from the legs and work up so you'll last longer.”
Zephyr's eyes widened as the mares smile became more and more like a sharks with sharp pointy teeth.
“ Uhhhh.” Zephyr whimpered.
“Or was that a chocolate rabbit... OOH I know, I shall pet you, and stroke you, and call you George. But how do I get you to breath underwater... or can boy friends do that naturally. Some one should write a book.” Sonata continued slinging him around by the neck.
There was a pop and a odd mishmash of creatures stuck together in a vaguely recognizable shape appeared.
“Sonata, your mothers making poffins and could use your help.” Discord offered.
“POFFINS!!” Sonata cheered flinging Zephyr into the air and running off to dive into the lake.
“Fly you fool, before she finds the ketchup.” Discord stage whispered to Zephyr before vanishing with a pop.
“If you were a vegetable, you’d be a ‘cute-cumber.'” Zephyr waggled his eyebrows. “Lettuce go out.”
“Oh gods no.” Rainbow Dash shuddered. “Did the restraining order lapse?”
“Hey no need to play coy Dashie.” Zephyr draped a foreleg over the mares back making her wince.” Come on, it'll be like old times.”
“Old times like where I went on a date with you cause I lost a bet, or old times like when Fluttershy convinced me to talk to you. “Rainbow Dash grumbled. “Seriously, you're like the kid that had to be coated with peanut butter so the dog would play with you.”
“Aww don't be like that Dashie.” Zephyr grinned leaning closer to her. “ Think of the fun weAKKK!”
The sound of a hoof hitting a muzzle echoed off the buildings as Zephyr staggered back away from Rainbow Dash and the well dressed white unicorn stallion now standing between her and the fallen Zephyr.
Prince Blueblood looked down at his hoof where he had belted the pegasus before looking back up as Zephyr rose to his hooves.
“You scuffed my hoof plebeian. Apologize to it.” Prince offered holding out his hoof expectantly.
“Gah that's assault, I can have you arrested and sued!!”Zephyr winced rubbing his nose.
“Assault? When you clearly got in the way of where my hoof was moving? Do you not know who I am commoner?” Prince glanced to Rainbow Dash behind him who was staring in confusion and amusement. “He doesn't know who I am.” Prince turns back to stare down at Zephyr. ”You must not know who I am. How droll.”
Prince puffs himself up glaring at the pegasus. “I am Prince William Blueblood, head of the Canterlot Bluebloods , a direct descendant of Princess Platinum and Princess Luna Noctus, Goddess of the Moon. Head Ambassador to the throne. 9th in line to the throne of the Crystal empire. Third richest pony on the planet, and 6th in line to the Equestrian throne. I could bury you in a shallow grave in the woods and if caught only receive a hoof slap and a small fine. Your threats bore me.”
“Please don't. Paperwork for shallow graves in the woods is a nightmare.” Comet Trail offered trotting up to the group. “Prince Blueblood would you please move along.”
The Ponyville Guard glared at Prince who huffed and trotted back with Rainbow Dash following along.
“My apologies for going full noble there. I know you are not the sort that wants or needs a knight in shining armor sort to rescue you.” Prince offered to Rainbow Dash as they walked off.
“Nah it's cool. Don't make it a habit though.” Rainbow Dash grinned not hiding the blush from Prince's actions very well.
Comet Trail watched them walk off before looking back at the stunned Zephyr. “Look bud. I've been getting complaints about you all day hitting on anything with a pulse... and at least two life like statues. I'm trying to have lunch with my wife, so if you go home now I'll call it finished and consider you warned. I'm still supposed to be on light duty for a bit longer....”
“Wow, did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?”Zephyr offered to a pretty blonde pegasus mare with gray fur nearby.
Ditzy blinked though before she could respond Zephyr was tackled by Comet Trail and had cuffs slapped on him.
“Gah what did I do!” Zephyr cried out.
“Harassment, loitering, damaging a nobles hoof, and anything else I can think of to throw at you. “The Guard growled as Ditzy giggled.
[Outside Golden Oaks Library]
Rahs stares into the middle distance, half the tree and much of the area around him covered with sticky jam from what had been a Trixie bomb.
He blinked, slowly reaching up to wipe off his face before sniffing the mess in his hand with a growl.
“Raspberry. Only one mare would DARE to give me the raspberry.”
Rahs growled as a glob of jam fell from his tail with a splat.
Rahs stared at his sister, his gaze shifting to the coating of jam that was spread across a good chunk of the library as well as soaked his sister. He also took note of Peewee and Blakeney passed out on the floor bellies distended from too much jam and bread, and they barely made a dent in the mess.
Twilight looked over her brother who was still dripping jam adding to the mess and the bitching from Seshat.
“Plan, Light at the End of the World?” Twilight asked.
“Wuff.” Rahs pondered.
“Right too high a chance of sending Canterlot sliding down the side of the mountain onto Ponyville with that one.” Twilight grumbled. ”Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?”
“Ruff.” Rahs counted.
“Right right, where would we even get a Renamon and a digi destined around here.” Twilight sighed.
Both of them stopped as the door was flung open and Applebloom trotted in towing a wagon.
The young mare paused looking at the two jam covered Sparkles and sighed before she turned and shoved the wagon forward showing a passed out, jam coated Spike laying in it with a red bow still stuck to his face.
“Either of yah wanna tell me why my boy friend is passed out, coated in jam with one of mai spare bows ah left in Canterlot stuck to his face?” Applebloom demanded.
“Bark?” Rahs questioned.
“Right, you know where the bow came from?”
“Please, mai sister has her hats ah got mai bows numbered and ah know where ah left um all, that one was mai spare ah left in Canterlot fer when we visit Princess Luna.” Applebloom pointed out then gestured to Spike. ”Now about this.”
“Celestia.” Twilight offered noting how Appleboom's drawl was coming out in full force, clearly she was pissed.
“Ah warned him that she don't play games with her pranks.” Applebloom sighed. The young mare trotted over to the desk grabbing a bit of paper and a pen jotting down a number of notes before offering it to Twilight who took it in her magic. She and Rahs looked over the potion description then looked to Applebloom.
“Ah Ain't gonna be part of this nonsense of yers, but ah ain't happy she used mai bow and mai form tah catch mai boyfriend. What yah do with that information is on you.”
Applebloom huffed and stormed out grumbling about how she didn't even like raspberries.
Twilight and Rahs watched her go, glanced to Spike, then back to the paper Applebloom left before the pair of them glanced to each other and grinned evilly.
[Two days later]
“Fluttershy how could you let your brother be arrested?” Fluttershy's father chided in a soft tone.
Fluttershy's mother, brute she was, was bawling that her little colt was in jail. Harry the bear sat nearby offering the mare tissues and patted her on the back.
Bishie rolled his eyes a little and continued to run a brush across Angel Bunny. The rabbit wasn't thrilled with the lack of skill the colt showed in his grooming, but he allowed it as the colt was still young and was learning.
“I didn't let him get arrested, he did all that himself and left me to clean up the mess he left of my house.” Fluttershy huffed.
Pinkie Pie had wisely fled as there had been a minor 'stare' off at the beginning of the discussion, that had ended fairly quickly after Bishie threatened to get the spray bottle.
“You were supposed to keep him out of trouble.” Fluttershy's dad offered.
“He's a grown adult, he wasn't supposed to need a foal sitter.” Fluttershy frowned. ”I have my own tasks and life to live. I can't spend all my life watching after him.”
“ He was arrested Fluttershy. What am I supposed to tell Bishie?”
“How about that one of my older brother's stupid ideas finally got him busted?” Bishie offered getting a surprised glance from the others. ”Don't give me that look. I'm eight, not an idiot. Even I can see a lot of his 'surefire plans' and ideas are of questionable morality, let alone intelligence.”
“Don't be mean Bishie.” Fluttershy offered causing the colt to roll his eyes. He did love his family but they were exasperating at times.
“Can't you use your connections to get him out?” Fluttershy's mother finally asked.
“First off I can and I tried. I was going to leave him in there for a day or two so he might learn something and I told the Guard Captain that was the plan. But evidently he was still offered a choice. To pay a fine, serve time, or enter Guard service.” Fluttershy flattened her ears. “It wasn't even a big fine, Bishie could have afforded it on his allowance.”
“No way, that's for comics and horror movies.” Bishie proclaimed.
“And he chose the Guard service.” Fluttershy's father sighed. “That's such a dangerous profession...”
“It's alright. Mister Comet Trail has told me that he's going to make sure Zephyr is alright.” Fluttershy offered.
“Well that's a relief at least.” Fluttershy's father sighed. ”Maybe a bit more rigid structure will do him good.”
( A shady pub in Canterlot)
A small booth seated three figures. The worn table had a few plates of food including a large basket of fries on it. The dim light hanging over the table only lit up the table leaving the ponies seated at it in shadow. One of them was greatly enjoying the fries as his wife had cut him off from greasy food.
The usual rough and tumble crowd of the pub took one look at the three seated there and gave that whole portion of the building a wide berth.
“So why did you ask to meet here?” The first asked.
“The fries here are the best in the city.” the second pointed out.
“I've had better.” the lone mare of the three offered.
“Where?” the second stallion demanded.
“Smokey Bobs.” the mare offered.
“Those aren't fries those are tater tots.” the second stallion pointed out.
“Same thing.” the mare shrugged.
“Blasphemy.” the second stallion huffed. “Any way you were the one who wanted to talk to us.”
“I did.” the first stallion agreed. “Word is you two are back on the job.”
“Ehh retirement was boring and after Tirek trashed the thieves guild and what the Guards did, we've been in high demand.” The mare offered.
“The group coming in this month. Are they yours?” The first stallion questioned.
“Mine yes, mares group starts next month.” the second stallion explained.
“Still think it's dumb to separate them. “ The mare shrugged.
“You just liked catching those that paired up and tried to be sneaky about it.” the second stallion cackled.
“Not true. I enjoyed critiquing their techniques, and you can't tell me that the ones that decided to ignore me and keep going didn't turn out to be some of the best.” the mare grumbled.
“Still don't know how Princess Cadence snuck past the posted Guards....” the second stallion chuckled.
“We distracted them for a box of Twinkies and a mango.” the first offered getting a glare from the other two. “Don't give me that look. It had been eight weeks already and three resets. Ponies have needs.”
“HA. Well. As amusing as it is to finally know the answer to that. What was it you wanted? I doubt this is a social call.” the mare offered.
“It isn't. After what you two did at my wedding you owe me.”
“We don't, but I'll humor you.” the second stallion chuckled.
“The snack table was like that when we got there, as was the eastern wall of the building.” the mare offered.
A photo was slapped on the table and pushed over to them. The mug shot of a pegasus stallion who looked like he was posing.
“This stallion is joining the next group.” the first stallion offered. “Guard service instead of time served.”
“Hmmm okay?” the mare offered “ And.”
“He managed to upset four of the Elements of Harmony enough to report him. One already had a restraining order. He also managed to aggravate Prince Blueblood and several other mares around town with blatant flirting and lewd comments...”
“A play colt huh?” the second stallion offered.
“... including my wife.”
There was a pause only broken by the second stallion eating a fry.
“So what do you want? I won't cause a fatal injury in my training.” the second stallion stated.
“No, with the sort of egotistical nonsense he spouts, he's clearly an idiot. Besides Fluttershy would gut me like a fish if I killed him, Ditzy wouldn't be happy either, which is more important. “Comet Trail leaned into the light as he next spoke. “I want Zephyr Breeze to be your special friend.”
The other two look at each other before they grin.
“Consider it done.” Jer'rahd Kaisur stated as Starfall Silvertail chuckled.” At least so long as you pick up the tab and don't tell my wife I was eating this.”
“That's your fourth basket of fries.” Comet Trail huffed.
“I told you these are the best fries.” Jer'rahd smirked.
“How is this legal?” Braeburn complained to the ref waving a hoof to the buckball playing field that had been set up for the Ponyville versus Apploosa match.
Zecora raised an eyebrow at that before looking back into the book of rules that Applebloom had given her before getting her out here to ref the game. As some one with no stake in the game she was perfect to judge it according to Applebloom.
Honestly Zecora thought it might have more to do with the fact they couldn't find the black and white shirt the ref usually wore.
Zecora looked in the book again, then up at the field that was mostly on fire with a cackling Sunset in the middle of it preventing Braeburn's team from advancing to the goal.
Also in the middle of the field denying shot after shot was a massive orange furred Witch-wolf simply smacking the ball away.
The final member of the team was a orange furred blur of green fire as Scootaloo darted around the field with turns and crimes against physics that would have made Twilight cry if she was here. The filly was completely unbothered by Sunset's pyromania and had scored the majority of the goals for her team.
Not to say the game was one sided, as Braeburn had chosen to be the coach, much as Rainbow Dash had done. His actual team was a Buffalo massive enough that all it had to do was sit in front of the goal to block it. Little Strong Heart, who as her role as a shaman counted as the unicorn for the team though she was just as quick and agile as Scootaloo. And a changeling who while no where near as quick and agile as Scootaloo, was shifting forms fast enough into odd shapes and was just as good at defense as Witch-Jack.
Sunset's lighting the field on fire was the latest strategy to limit the other team.
Little Strong Heart was already calling a storm to put it out.
The score was after ten minutes 8 to 8 and despite being the ref she had no idea how any of those scores had even happened.
Zecora closed the book with a sigh.
“Ah've given it anotha look, and there's nothing about fiah in tha book!” Zecora stated, restarting the game.
[ Canterlot Castle.]
It was cute really, Celestia thought to herself. That they thought this would work.
Across from her sat Luna sipping her coffee, clearly having missed the news. Luna was also still using the mug that read 'Best Princess' with the sun crossed out on it and a crescent moon hastily drawn on the side.
Celestia would get that mug back one day. Probably in time for coco season.
Mysteriously, all her main chefs had called out sick today and the backups had to be called in. She shook her head filling her cup with tea before taking a drink of it.
Like she couldn't see Twilight's plan to mess with her food. Still what better way to deal with a trap then to spring it.
In truth if she hadn't been looking for it she still might have missed it, and she had no idea how she could have missed this.
“Le arf?” Rahs asked Luna. He was currently dressed like a fancy waiter with a massive curled mustache on his face.
Luna didn't even look up from the provided menu.
“We shall have the fettuccini with broccoli and spinach.” Luna offered as Rahs jotted it down before walking over to Celestia with a wide grin on his face.
“Le Bark?” he asked casually and Celestia simply rolled her eyes.
“I'll have the tall stack of pancakes with maple syrup, whip cream and strawberries.” Celestia offered staring dead on at Rahs who wrote it down as well before bowing and padding off to the kitchen.
Celestia sighed taking another sip of tea before refilling her cup. Honestly this was amateurish. Like she would eat anything that lot provided.
She had gone through a few more cups by the time the food showed up. Her platter carried by Rahs, with Spike also in a tux, and a even more ridiculous mustache, presenting Luna's food.
Twilight stood at the door to the kitchens in a chiefs hat and a full Fu Manchu mustache and beard.
Celestia sighed as Luna gathered her fork, her own magic stopping her sister from taking a bite.
“Seriously Twilight, do you expect cheap costumes and Prench accents to fool us?” Celestia huffed shaking her head as Luna blinked and actually looked at the trio by the door her eyes widening. ”I may have been born at night, but it wasn't last night.”
Celestia huffed and teleported both meals directly to the dump dropping the now empty plates in the kitchen sink for good measure all while still staring down the Sparkles.
The trio looked at each other then back to her and only seemed to grin wider.
Celestia frowned at that. That was a worrying reaction.
“Why are you smiling?” Luna questioned before taking a drink of her coffee, pausing before spitting it out and coughing before looking into her mug with a frown. “What deviltry is this?”
“Please Princess, do you think we would reveal our hoof if it wasn't already too late?” Spike smirked wider.
“We've been here since late last night and made your coffee and tea too.” Twilight grinned. "Quite a nasty little potion in there just coming into effect."
“Pity you threw out the antidote in a fit of paranoia. Just as planned.”
“A a small dose it should only last a few days, but you two have been chugging.....Peace out!” Twilight offered before her horn flared and the trio vanished in a pop of teleportation.
Luna was screaming as Celestia tasted her tea again. The flavor was not the calming mint of earlier.
Celestia spit it out as quickly as Luna did, the pair of them looked at each other and rushed into the kitchen, tearing open fresh packages and obvious unsullied items trying them all with the same result.
Everything tasted like black licorice.
“That mare wants a war.” Celestia snarled spitting out the remains of a twinkie, the cream filling ruined. “She is getting one."
“It was your idea to use Jam Golems!!” Luna wailed spitting out a hoof full of chocolate coffee beans, now the flavor of rancid death “We surrendered after they defiled my moon why are we still suffering!!”
A tall white mare in Sunglasses and a trench coat, who was totally not Celestia, stop saying that, her name was... Cel besta? Yes, Cel-bestia, no relation to the Princess at all, sat in a chair staring at the figure across from her.
Discord was too amused to dress up for this, but he was petting a white cat and sitting in a high backed swivel chair so he could spin around dramatically.
Wait that was Rahs' thing.
He sent Opal back to Rarity colored green and changed his chair to one made of macaroni noodles.
“After all this, you come to me.....”
“I need a favor.”
“Oh? You know my price.”
“No, I didn't know you had a price. You've not told anyone about a price.”
“Oh. I knew I forgot something.”
“Still as a favor I do have this to offer.” Celbestia stated from behind the obviously fake beard that looked like it was a chunk of her sisters tail.
A large square item in a bag was set on the table and slid across to Discord.
The Draconequus raised an eyebrow and picked it up pulling the item out of the bag.
It was an unopened copy of Moosy Python's Soaring Faire's Instant Record Collection on vinyl, the material not the pony.
Discord pursed his lips and slid the item back into the bag.
“Acceptable. What did you want?”
Cel-bestia explained and Discord's grin grew wide.
(Ponyville, early Summer)
“So that's the plan?” Starlight asked taking a sip of her tea as Trixie smirked on the other side of the table.
“Indeed.” Trixie intoned.
“Well I can't see any real fault in it.” Tempest considered nibbling on a cookie. The three of them had gotten together for their weekly brunch, though they saw each other quite often normally too. Starlight had been hired to work in Golden Oaks as an Assistant Librarian by Trixie and Tempest and Starlight still lived at Seshat, but it was nice to sit down with nothing going on.
At least until Tempest noticed Starlight devouring everything in front of her and still not putting on a single pound.
Trixie at least had an excuse being part dragon now, plus she ate gems which couldn't have that high of a caloric intake.
“The only thing I don't get, is I know you don't have any shows or anything really going on this week. “ Starlight considered. “Why are you and Rahs only going on a date next week?”
“True, none of the other girls are set up for this week either.” Tempest considered. She was still terrified of Rahs, but it was manageable at the moment, and she at least didn't scream anytime he popped up nearby like Starlight did.
“Ahh that is simple.” Trixie stated holding up a clawed finger.” Trixie still talks with Princess Luna and now that she can use messenger flames it is much simpler. Princess Luna has warned Trixie that the counter prank is this week and Trixie wants nothing to do with whatever that mad sister of Luna's will do.”
“The licorice potion was a horrible prank.” Tempest agreed.” It's a good reminder not to mess with anyone dating a Sparkle as well.”
“Applebloom is quite vicious.” Trixie nodded.
“I dunno, I kinda like licorice.” Starlight offered.
Both the other mares stopped and looked at the third member of their party curiously. Starlight blinked in confusion at the attention.
“This explains a few things.” Trixie offered as Tempest nodded along.
“What?” Starlight demanded.
An answer was not forthcoming as the sound of Burro music filled the air complete with guitar, violins, and multiple trumpets.
The trio turned to look and spotted a very annoyed looking Spike walking down the street with a five pony Mariachi band following behind him adding constant musical accompaniment to his travels.
The annoyed looking dragon glanced to the three, offered a wave and trekked on to a flare of trumpets.
The trio watched as the dragon and his entourage moved out of sight, the music taking a while to fade.
“Well. That's a thing.” Starlight offered.
“Ugh, we are going to have to hear that until they get rid of them aren't we?” Tempest growled.
Tempest and Starlight looked at each other then back at Trixie.
“Trixie did you have any extra rooms at your place for a few days?” Starlight asked.
“Trixie thinks she can manage.” the half dragon shook her head wondering if Celestia got the band to follow all of the Sparkles.
[Seshat]
“BORK!” Rahs protested with his arms crossed as Twilight screamed out curses as the band followed her through out the house, the chaos magic of their summons preventing the players from getting tired, or being dismissed, and since they were real, and being paid, Rahs couldn't bite them away.
Rahs wasn't annoyed that Celestia had forced a Mariachi band to follow him, he was annoyed that she HADN'T forced a Mariachi band to follow him.
“Just imagine what I could do with theme music....”
Saturnia let out a small sigh looking over the cribs of her sister and half brother. Or was that the other way around? Meh whatever. Rahs' nephew and niece were in the cribs too, though it was a pretty safe bet that Bri hadn't been informed the pair were going to be yanked out of the Oneiri again.
She needed to send a message to the Moon Dog bitch or she'd pop up here and possibly wake them up. Which was not needed after she just got the four of them to sleep.
The pink changeling princess looked over to Sunburst who had his own son passed out over his back as the three of them snuk out of the room, the colt was a bit older than the royal foals, but was still a toddler.
Both Moon Dancer and Sunburst carried a water bottle in their kit now to spray Cadence if she started getting any shipping ideas for the foals.
“I'll send a message to Bri.” Sunburst whispered. “She's probably worried and or annoyed again.”
Saturnia nodded as the pair of them left the room and headed their separate ways, leaving a pair of Guards and a nanny to keep an ear out for when the foals woke up.
Saturnia groaned, she hadn't expected to come up here and get dumped on foal sitting duty, but these sort of things happened at times. Father....Cadence was attending some concert with Shining, and a couple of ambassadors, while her mother was checking out something odd with a few of the Changelings that had been born here in recent years.
The average changeling was black with green or blue highlights, hair and wings. Occasionally there would be other colors born, she herself was a prime example of that, as her hair and wings were the same pink as her father, Cadence.
Recently however the Changelings born in the empire were all different colors, and strangely enough sometimes their carapaces were not black either. There was a colt grub born who was a deep navy blue white white hair and wings. There was another that was an almost neon green. There were still a few born as normal changeling coloration, but they were becoming some what rare, but only in the Empire. The bright Changelings were already being called Crystal Changelings and seemed to be emitting emotions rather than eating them. One of them looked like he had small,moose horns growing as well rather than the single gnarled horn.
They didn't have any voids either, which led some to wonder if they were changelings at all. Which was something that bothered her mother, god of the changelings for good reason.
This was hardly the only oddity in the Empire as despite there only being Crystal earth ponies, a few new foals had been Pegasi and one had been a unicorn, not full blood however, but it lead to some interesting thoughts that the other two types of Crystal pony might be recoverable from extinction.
Given how the Crystaling worked around here it wasn't really unexpected for some change, though it seemed to worry Chrysalis a good bit given her grumblings about poison joke and explosions.
Saturnia had no idea what her mother was on about, but she had learned to ignore most of the oddities the God of Change had.
She was joined on this trip by Kevin and Thorax, Bees having been banned from the Empire for 'Halping' last time he was here.
Saturnia didn't have the security clearance to know what Bees had done, which was saying a lot given she was a Princess here.
Kevin however had brought along his mare friend, which was a surprise and half. The impassive looking mare was a overflowing well of emotions that Saturnia had never experienced before. If Kevin had met her before the wedding fiasco the Changeling race could have survived just on her output.
The other thing of note was Thorax. The pretty much background Changeling had met the regent of the Dragonlands at a Applewood derby and the pair had hung out anytime they were in the same town.
Honestly Saturnia didn't think he had it in him to go for some one that important, but hopefully it would work out. Dragons were hard to read emotionally.
Which was much more annoying that Trixie was the Dragon Lord and part dragon now. Well more dragon than she was before anyway.
Saturnia frowned at that. Despite Sunset and her plan to team up to claim Rahs far too many roadblocks had happened. Trixie's ascension, the damn fish, the bitches teaming up, and now this prank war. It was a bit too dangerous to be around him if you didn't plan right.
Still all of them had learned when to step back. In fact the date she and Rahs had two days ago was probably the last safe moment as the Sparkles were counter pranking today after the mareiachi band thing.
[ Canterlot]
Princess Celestia frowned as the next case was brought up in Day Court. The entire throne room was standing room only, and that was intentional as there were no chairs in the throne room at the moment.
Every time a chair, or throne, or bench, or pew, was brought into the room it was teleported some where else. Celestia wasn't sure where.
Of course that wasn't the prank, it was just the part that forced her to stand and keep her Cutie-mark visible. Not that throwing a dress or blanket over her cutie-mark helped and even illusion spells broke.
Princess Celestia just sighed, sparing a glance back to her cutie-mark.
Instead of the sun that was supposed to be there the image changed every seven point two seconds.
Damn Sparkles couldn't even give her an even number for it.
The first image was simply Twilight's cutie-mark appearing on her flank. Amusing but hardly annoying.
When the image changed however there was a loud PING and it felt like some one poked her cutie-mark and Celestia was compelled to shout out 'Let's fly to the castle!' for some reason.
The second image was a cartoon looking dragon head giving a peace sign with it's claws and a large graffiti styled' Spike was here' under the image.
The third image was heralded by a fanfare of trumpets and plastered her flank with an ad for The Ball Theater in Ponyville. The music played for the entire seven point two seconds and cut off sharply before any one could get invested in the tune, though that little bit of catchy music was running on loop in her head as an ear-worm regardless.
And when the image changed back to Twilight's cutie-mark, the change was sounded out by a 2 second long, loud farting sound.
Princess Celestia drew in a deep breath as she watched the nobles and other petitioners react with shock, amusement, and confusion, though the constant repeating had a number of them rushing through what they wanted in the few seconds where there wasn't any noise coming from her flank.
Applejack's eyes narrowed as Granny and her mother went on about some story or another that painted her in a bad light.
Granny broke out the pictures.
Applejack sighed and let it be, luckily the new vendor they picked for their Zapp Apple jam was understanding on the mix up, though he was also reluctant to give back the cider.
Applejack had passed him a growler of cider to make things go a little smoother, which worked.
Still this was a bit immature of Applebloom to lie like that, let alone making a mistake like she did, though Applejack was willing to overlook it because they caught it and the filly was tired. Sure she was older, but she was also doing a lot more studying in other things and hadn't done as much farm work as she used to now that Bright Mac and Pear Butter were back.
Still her attention shifted off towards town. She hadn't seen hide nor hair of Rahs since the Zapp Apple season started. Granted she had caught Rainbow and Prince trying to sneak into their cider supplies at least twice. She was pretty sure Prince was doing it more for the thrill of trying to get away from an angry Witch-Jack or worse, Granny, than actually wanting any cider.
But it was odd Rahs wasn't here.
Still after Celestia did her thing and the Sparkles recovered from whatever it was that was done to them this time, she had a date lined up with Rahs, and she had a cask of Cider set aside for it.
[Seshat]
“Here's another one.” Ditzy stated dumping a massive bag of mail on the floor. Twilight herself was already almost buried under the insane pile of mail.
Rahs had a somewhat sizable pile as well and Spike... well Spike was under his pile somewhere. This had been going on all morning with a steady stream of postal workers hauling bag after bag after bag of letters and packages in to dump before, and then onto the Sparkles, if they didn't move fast enough.
Spike had opened a few of his first. Most of them were basic complaints and bitching about his choices. It took a number of more letters before Spike figured out what the complaints were about. Evidently some one had let slip that he was all for removing a fan favorite combo from a card game to promote balance.
Spike didn't even play said card game.
Rahs was furious as crappy versions of his seasonal applications had been sent out early for most of the shows across Equestria and he had been rejected from all of them due to the appalling state of 'his' resume.
Rahs had yet to send anything out.
Twilight however had the worst of it. Evidently a large number of credited paleontologists had gotten letters and documentation from Twilight , that claimed the Spinasaurus, was actually a flying dinosaur.
The literal eruption of mail contained very very wordy insults and arguments as to why she was wrong and had the pile of letters after her even bigger than Spike's.
Twilight didn't have much interest in paleontology and didn't even know there was a Spinasaurus debate until it was literally dumped on her head.
Twilight pushed her way out of the letters looking to Rahs who was nearly foaming at the mouth, and the little bit of Spikes tail she could see from his pile.
“Plan Giga six?”
“Bork.” Rahs shook his head.
“I like being able to breath atmosphere.” Spike called.
“Wuff.” Rahs said firmly.
“Plan A one? That's a nuclear option.” Twilight hummed.
Rahs sighed looking down at the letter of refusal for him to play Snowfall Frost in A Hearths Warming tale.
If he was being honest, he had never considered applying for that role before, at least this rejection letter was only due to him being male, not like he hadn't put on a dress to play a girl before, but evidently they didn't want that.
He had managed to snag the role of the Ghost of Hearth's Warming Future in the play once. Granted he had only gotten the role because he was supposedly big and scary. No one had expected him to do any of the lines, let alone the entire song. The pony that they had gotten to do the voice over was a bit miffed that his job wasn't needed.
Still that was years ago.
Rahs sighed tossing the letter in to the small fire he had burning outside in a cast iron pot with the fire burning only oak wood lit by lightning.
While complicated, it was a superstition that Miss Broadway had imparted to those who used her theater. It was.... well Rahs wasn't sure what superstition it was supposed to work with, but he did it anyway, even in as hot a summer as this was.
In truth he hadn't had a actual role any where other than at The Ball in quite a while, and aside from a few small plays and letting the school drama club use it, the theater hadn't seen much use either.
While this prank had a lot of rejection letters at once, he hadn't had many roles in anything since he came to Ponyville. With everything going on he was often stuck around the town and sadly this meant that Celestia's prank, while it hurt, hadn't really changed how everything would go normally.
For him any way. Spike and Twilight were still trying to get their issues under control. Spike was going to make an announcement at the next Crystal Con.
Twilight had gotten responded to all the letters and had promptly gotten into a letter war with a number of professors and others that sent in letters about things completely unrelated to the original prank.
Rahs tossed another letter on the fire and frowned, before a smirk crossed his face as he remembered the counter prank.
“Ask not for whom the bell tolls...”
[Canterlot]
Princess Celestia stared at Raven Inkwell.
Really STARED at her.
Raven, well used to this sort of thing, ignored her and continued to direct the circus that was the Day Court Room.
Seeing she was getting no reaction, Princess Celestia then turned to stare at her sister.
Princess Luna ignored completely her and dragged another guard over to watch her open a present.
Somehow, some way, the damn Sparkles had done something that no one else in several thousand years, not even DISCORD, had done.
Celestia looked out over the massive crowd gathered in the throne room, every one of them carrying a gift of some kind, or two, and the line went around the castle. Streamers and balloons were everywhere, there was a parade going on outside, and mail ponies were still delivering countless gifts from all over Equestria and much of the world.
"Another package from Griffonstone Princess!" A young blue griffon sang dropping a pile of packages onto the other pile of packages before flying off.
It was Princess Celestia and Princess Luna's Birthday.
And everyone was celebrating.
It was NOT either of their birthdays.
Not even close.
"Look Look, this one is from a filly in Chicagcolt, she sent me a macaroni picture of my moon squishing a dragon!!" Luna cheered. "Lacy Frill, put this one on the wall too."
The mentioned maid took it and flew out of the room to where a unicorn was balanced on a ladder to apply sticking spells to hold it on the wall of the hallway just outside of the throne room, there was a rather large collection of drawings and art from foals adorning the walls.
There were plans to add the great hall to the tours so any foals on the tour could see if their art was there.
It was.
"Luna..." Celestia frowned.
"Ahh this one has sent me a copy of the fifth giant robot game." Luna frowned." We already have this one though.... AHHH, we shall send it back along with a offer for them to play it as well, the more ponies who play the game means they will make more of the game, does it not?" Luna asked a Guard who shrugged.
"Luna.... " Celestia tried again. She had kept her birthday secret from Equestria for so long, when she made Luna do the same her sister had accepted her logic of not wanting any sort of holiday or massive event to come of it.
"Oh what is this?" Luna asked opening a letter and looking at the page that fell out her eyes widening as she read it, before she looked to the included photos." OOH!! Salacious!"
Celestia face hooved. How the Sparkles had convinced White to give an interview to a group of newspapers on when Celestia and Luna's birthday was was any ponies guess. Even if the rabbit followed the agreement she forced on him not to tell, he claimed he knew what day and year it was and said he had told someone.
He had. White had needed to remind their mother when their birthdays were a few times in the past.
Twilight claimed she was the one told and the public then latched onto Twilight who was known as the Alicorn of magic, and Tuesdays, who stated as Celestia's student. Surely she knew the date and what she told everyone was correct.
She was off by months.
Celestia's birthday was near Nightmare Night. Luna's was near the summer sun Celebration, which was well past.
"Oh my ... there are two of them? A mare and a stallion?" Luna asked looking between the pair of photos that came with that letter." While we have been favoring mares as of late, as the younger crowd says ... DAAAMN."
"LUNA!"
"What Tia!" Luna sighed not putting down the pictures, the Guard and the Maid both were staring over Luna's shoulders as well to look at them.
"This will not stand."
"We certainly hope not. Would be better to be laying down... or sitting... or bent over something..."
"FOCUS LUNA."
"We are VERY focused Tia."
"This prank cannot go uncountered." Celestia growled.
"But.. TWINS Tia! TWINS and they very much want to meet me.." Luna purrs.
Celestia rolled her eyes. The Sparkles would pay for this. There was no way she could enjoy a cake covered in as many candles as her age was.
It was also half frozen, half turned into sand, and half grape jello.
There was also a half that was a bit too much like a 3/4ths, rather than a half, but the other dozen or so halves of the castle allowed it's existence.
That 3/4ths half was currently a very confused sperm whale.
It was on speaking terms with the ground however, or at least the over grown neon orange spider plant that took up most of the mountain top.
Inside the castle was a bit stranger. Hallways lead to no where, portraits of the Princesses were decked out with goatees and Fu-Manchu mustaches, certain doors were on different levels than other doors, and all the pictures and windows were tilted just a bit to the left.
A rather large ax was embedded in the marble floor at the entrance of the new hall of pictures and foal artwork sent to Princess Luna, and as such that particular hall was unscathed.
There were a surprising number of snakes, both real and fake.
Several cakes wandered the hall, either moving as slugs or on countless little spider legs. One of them was snatched up and devoured by a mimic that looked like a suit of pony armor.
Little in the building was the same color it had started as and a number of things were invisible to pony eyes having changed to colors that could not be seen. mostly doors and walls, a few of them had craters in them because of this.
In the main throne room however a stand off was happening.
Princess Twilight Tuesday Sparkle ( a name now appointed by royal decry) stood on the remains of the carpet leading up to the thrones, the normal red of it now a off shade of paisley blue, with moving patterns. Her normally purple form looked more like a black and white sketch drawing at the moment.
Sonata had started singing Take on Me the moment she saw it.
Sir Spike Sparkle Scale (not a Royal Decry, that was his full title and name) stood next to her his arms crossed over his chest. His scales were teal with a yellow underbelly and his spikes were all on fire.
Lord Rahs Shar Sparkle of the Oneiroi, First of his name (also not a Royal Decry, he just liked the sound of it. ) stood on the other side of Twilight. He was his normal colors, though he had a rainbow clown wig and a bright red clown nose stuck to his head. Also every time he spoke it came out as a a clown horn noise.
Princess Celestia Solaras (technically a Royal Decry as her mother had named her and Law was the queen at the time.) stood next to her throne. A throne that was currently existing only in two dimensions and thus could not actually be sat upon unless some funky maths got involved. Her normally white fur was a glaring shade of pink that some how offended both Pinkie Pie and Princess Cadence when they had seen it, her horn was a brass saxophone, her mane and tail standing up straight in liberty spikes, and her wings were currently on her butt with her cutie-mark on her shoulders.
Princess Luna Nocturnus( also by Royal Decry as her mother, Law, was still a Queen at the time), was no where near the castle today as she had a date, two of them in truth.
Discord had been watching with popcorn, and was now in bed with the mother of all stomach aches.
Not literally, just to clear that up, he has some taste, and was trying to get back with Aqua so cheating on her with a stomach ache wouldn't have helped.
The group of them had been going full bore the last few days and it had cumulated with the current showdown.
"So Princess. You finally surrendering?" Twilight smirked.
"Hardly. I've yet begun to fight." Princess Celestia chuckled.
"Well that explains why your pranks have been so weak lately, you better start trying to fight." Spike added.
"Honk!" Rahs agreed.
"Such confidence means nothing. You are several thousand years too young to beat me." Princess Celestia scoffed.
"BEEP!" Rahs taunted.
"Owch." Twilight flinched.
"Yeah dude, no need to get nasty." Spike offered looking at Rahs.
"Awoooogah!" Rahs added.
"Yeah okay, maybe there's some reason to get that nasty. "Spike shrugged.
"Regardless I am hardly out of prank ideas and I can keep doing this for years more. While you seem to be running on fumes already." Princess Celestia taunts.
"Please. We've not even gotten to a quarter of the ideas we've come up with. "Twilight snarked. "We can keep doing this for as long as it takes."
"NO YOU CAN'T!!!!!!" A massive cry erupted from around them.
The Sparkles and the Princess looked around some how having missed that the room was no filled with most of the palace staff, a good chunk of the nobles, a large number of citizens, and most of Ponyville, including the Mayor, the other Element Bearers, the Crusaders, Rahs' suitors, and the rest of the Apple family.
"Ummm." Spike blinked.
"This Prank war ends now. " Empress Cadence stated flatly. "It has gone on all year and it feels like it's been going on for two years because of it!"
“The damages alone far surpass what the local insurance companies are willing to pay for. As such 'Pranks' are now counted among the things that no insurance company will cover, same as Noble Excess, hurting Fluttershy, and pissing off a Sparkle." Mayor Mare offers. " And all of it is in MY TOWN!"
"Uhh." Twilight eloquently stated.
“Not to mention Princess.” Raven Inkwell stated. “ that the entirety of Canterlot has practically been a war zone with nothing running smoothly due to this prank war for the entire time. We had just started to catch up on our backlog and with these events, now we are a year behind yet again.”
“Then there is the fact that no other country is willing to send any of their ambassadors here for fear of them getting caught up in this, so a large number of trade negotiations have fallen through. “Prince Blueblood added.
“It's also the time of year where something happens, and we need these guys focused.” Rainbow Dash gestured to the Sparkles. “ Seriously every damn year.”
“That's a fair cop.”
“Seriously it's been a year and you've not even managed to pay me back for the piranha thing yet.” Chrysalis offered.” I'm getting bored.”
“Um a lot of the pranks are disrupting the local animals with the loud noises and odd smells.... you kinda need to stop.” Fluttershy offered.
“Then we can have an end of the prank war party!” Pinkie Pie added.
“You can't just end a prank war.” Princess Celestia huffed. “There has to be a winner.”
“Oh we know Darling.” Rarity chimed up. “The thing is the winner doesn't have to be anyone involved in the prank war.”
“Hold on.. what.. GAK!!” Spike gagged as Applebloom trotted up stomped on his tail and dumped a potion down his throat as he opened his mouth to cry out.
“Alright he's good. That'll last about twelve hours.” Applebloom started as she walked back into the crowd. “This needs tah stop cause Ah want my boy friends free time tah be on me, not on plotting tah make Princess Celestia bald or whatever.”
“MMMHMMMM” All six of Rahs' suitors agreed, then glared at each other.
Rahs swallows hard.
“There's not been any precedent for a prank war to end without a winner or some one conceding, and there's only been one case of..... oh no.” Twilight's eyes widened as a Cadence, Chrysalis and a few other gods in the horde put up a teleport barrier around the four at the throne.
“Ready. Aim. Fire!” Sweetiebelle shouts out as every one present starts throwing pies at the group, the mass of whip cream and fruit fillings splattering into the prank group, most missed but there were enough that the pile on the floor and throne started getting bigger and bigger leaving the group flailing and slipping in the prolific pile of plastering pastries, as the Sparkles, and Princess Celestia were soon burred under a pile of pies that continued to grow as everyone in the room throws a pie or two. The first group then rotates out for the massive line that was running down to the train station to start shuffling in. Several stalls selling pies out side the castle doors were making a brisk business, and the Cakes and Apples there were constantly making more pies for the the event.
After about two hours of this, the throne room was filled with pies with nearly the entire population of two cities adding to it.
Prince Sombra Nocturnus, (Sorta by royal decry, it's complicated and he doesn't answer to any of it but Sombra) walks up to the mess, looking at it then looking down at the chocolate pie he had purchased before shrugging and walking off starting to eat the treat.
[Mid Summer, Ponyville, One week after the Sparkles and Princess were pulled out of the pie mound, clean up still ongoing.]
To say the town of Ponyville was tense would be an understatement, the Guards were on high alert, the townsfolk keeping to cover when they could and staying home despite there being no real curfew. The Flower Trio hadn't been seen in three days, which annoyed Captain Comet Trail as his second, Lode Stone, hadn't been seen in three days either.
The Sparkles were preparing plans for what might happen based off who they had already dealt with, and any of Celestia's other exs that might be out there.
Chrysalis had volunteered to help with this. Thorax and Kevin were assigned to keep an eye on her, though Kevin was in a corner with his mare friend Maud and both were just silently listening in.
As such a lot of creatures were sitting around the Crystal table waiting, at least those that didn't have a real job, or this WAS their real job.
“Well she did date a griffon at one point, but I'm pretty sure he died a long while back.” Chrysalis considered tapping a hoof to her chin. “And we all know about Grannysmith's mom, so that covers any attack from the Apples. Unless Applebloom gets annoyed again. Seriously kid you know how to pick them. Didn't any one ever warn you away from red heads?”
“No one told me what to do when a red head decided I was hers however.” Spike sighed with a smirk as he kicked back in his chair after a quick look around to make sure Applebloom wasn't there.
“Wuff.” Rahs pointed out, the moon dog had been a bit surprised that Aria had joined them at his session and rather than having taken a seat at the table, had taken a seat in his lap. Usually it was Sunset or Trixie doing that.
“Right. Okay, Bleu did, and her advice was to just roll with it and enjoy it.” Spike admitted.
“Still surprised you're here and not up in the Empire guarding your foal.” Tempest pointed out from another seat near where Starlight sat trying not to be noticed.
“Every so often I need to leave those two on foal duty to remind them they have no idea what the heck they are doing.” Chrysalis smirked, then she frowned. ”Might need to check on them though in case that's the disaster.”
“Going by the network we have set up..” Aria offered waving a Crystal Tablet with her hand as she lay across Rahs' lap in her human form wearing a rather tight pair of what she called jeans and a tank top that showed off her abs. “There's no breaking news or obvious issues in the Empire, Canterlot, Manehatten, Chicagcolt, Wilmingtrot, or Las Pegasus. Nor anything on any of the small towns along the route of the towers that any one is talking about. We made sure to give each of the leaders of all the places connected to a tablet so they could call for aid if need be.”
“That's not a large area.” Starlight added.
“Still wondering why I'm the main link for Ponyville.” Seshat added.
“Cause you're the tallest thing here and we're working on that. Saturnia is dealing with all the legalities of putting the towers in certain areas, and we have a program that runs a network pulse every couple of seconds to ensure everything's working properly.” Aria offered wiggling in Rahs' lap. The moon dog gripping the arm of his chair a little tighter as a result. “The goal is eventual global coverage. We think we'll have that in three years, or at least in the places that want it, and all of the pirate hunting airships. We're already making plans to figure out a way to outfit the Princess Bride as a test ship.”
“Why are you here if you have to do all that still?” Spike asked.
“I'm the head engineer. I get called in to plan and trouble shoot, or yell at people who screw something up.” Aria offered waving the tablet again. ”Technically I'm troubleshooting right now.”
“I need that sort of job.”Chrysalis offered. “Where is everyone else anyway? I figured the other Element Bearers or at least Discord would be here to screw with things.”
“Dad and Sonata are in Atlantis.” Aria offered.” Which is why I didn't include it on the list of places that had no issues.”
“Every pony else has jobs.” Twilight offered.” With everyone on high alert like this, there's numerous checklists for Ponyville to ensure everything's prepared for anything.”
Everyone at the table stared at Twilight.
Twilight huffed. ”I didn't make them. Those check lists were already in place.”
“And she's still salty about it.”
Aria looked up from her tablet at Rahs with an eyebrow raised before looking back at her tablet.
“So what we all just remain at ready until something happens?” Starlight asked.
“Pretty much. At least for the rest of the summer. Once school starts back up we should be good.” Spike offered.
“Should be?” Starlight asked.
“This is Ponyville.” Thorax added.
“Fair enough.” Chrysalis huffed. “So what now we just wait?”
“Well we could play a game.” Spike pointed out.” I've got plenty of them I never get a chance to use.”
“Whatcha got?” Kevin asked.
“For a group this size I figure teams Pictionary or win lose or draw is probably the best.” Spike offered.” Let's see, Chrysalis and … Starlight, are team captains. We'll do round robin team picking.”
After a bit of shuffling and some annoyance at having to move the teams were set.
Starlight wound up with Thorax, Maud, Aria, and Rahs, mostly due to Aria's protests about having to move. Starlight really didn't want to be near Rahs, and really wished she could have gotten Tempest instead or Trixie was here.
Chrysalis got Twilight, Kevin, Tempest, and Spike.
Seshat got to ref.
About twenty minutes later, Rahs and Chrysalis had started a drama off with each other. Kevin and Maud had run off to a spare bedroom. Aria was griping about the drama off. Twilight was still arguing with Spike about how her drawing looked nothing like Orcus' third law. Tempest was drunk, Thorax was knocked out and Starlight was sitting there wishing they had gone to fly kites instead.
Half of Ponyville was also on fire and there were riots as some pony's had a bad reaction to seeing Twilight's 2-d drawings in four dimensions that had some how escaped the paper and were wandering the town.
Seshat had decided to take a nap and ignore everything.
And Saturnia was pissed her mother had eaten all her cereal again.
The pink maned unicorn paused looking up from his notebook, well, her notebook. Due to a slight miscalculation in the latest batch of bodies the wrong chromosome had happened and the bodies had been mares. To be honest it hardly mattered to Solomon, while interesting it was also a bit of a distraction, though he had adjusted the problem and started on a new set of bodies. The two mare ones were to be used despite the annoyance. It's not like the bodies lasted more than a week or two before they needed replacing anyway.
Solomon's eyes narrowed at the sound of a heavy hoof falls echoing off the tubes. The only reason this one would do that was to announce he was here.
“I was wondering when you were going to show up. The old goat demanded I come here and wait for him and it's been over a year.” Solomon huffed.
“You know as well as I do we exist at his mercy.” the figure approaching sighed. “So when did you get such a nice ass?”
“Grew it myself, far to many issues to bother with it again however. You can have it when I'm done.” Solomon scoffed.
“Meh, when you finish with something it's hardly better than slurry in the shape of a pony.”
“So has he sent you to demand I come to him?” Solomon asked looking back at his clipboard, then to the tube before him.” Because this is a bad time.”
“Pretty much. I've got one more to bring in and if your minions have done what they were supposed to that should be everyone he wants.”
“They should be getting the last thing on the list now.” Solomon sighed. “So what exactly is his plot this time?It can't be to destroy Starswirl still.”
“No. The old goat is gone thanks to my corrupting the fools apprentice.” the voice offered.” Pity about all that in the end, she was quite skilled. But no, he tells me the same things as he tells you. It's probably world domination again. Or to kill some gods. Or it could be he needs a particular plant for his back garden. You know how he is.”
“This is true.” Solomon sighed. “So when is the meeting?”
“End of the year, just after Heaths Warming, in that odd time between the last celebration and the end of the year. He says things are weaker then.” the voice offered. “At the usual place.”
“They are. Though only for a specific sort of magic.” Solomon hummed. ”I suppose it is a good time as any for a meeting, the strange liminal spot of time will make noticing anything else strange rather difficult. I doubt it would stop White however.”
“The rabbit doesn't interfere, you should know that given how you ended up.”
Solomon sighed. ”Was that all?”
“Pretty much. Such a waste of my time to play messenger.”
“And yet it was what he told you to do Bray. Just as he told me to wait for his missive.” Solomon looked back at the Donkey hiding in the shadows.” Until the end of the year then.”
“Indeed.” Bray offered and seemed to vanish without a sound.
Solomon waited a moment more before the presence of the Donkey faded before turning his attention back to the pink form in the tube.
“Doooooo do, dooooo doot doot, doot doot doot doo doo doo doo doo, doot doo....” Adagio hummed to herself, as Squall tried to ignore the annoying tune.
The pair of them had progressed into what Adagio had called the second layer of Greek hell.
Squall had no idea what a Greek was or even the term hell, but if any place was a collection of those words, he suspected it was here.
They had managed to avoid the guardian rather easily, for such a fearsome beast, a simple ball was an easy distraction.
The roving demonic creatures that called this place home however were a bit harder to deal with. Some of them looked like twisted ponies, blackened and corrupt, others were simple golems of stone, bone, or fire. Flying things flitted around the caverns their screams echoing off the surrounding rock and burning pitch, blood hounds set to track anything that the others missed.
They were not a problem in any real sense, just literally harder to deal with, the sounds were deafeningly painful, and the sight of them felt like it was curdling his mind.
Neither Squall nor Adagio were bothered by such things directly. There were dead that would not die in this place, so Squall was hardly noticed, and there were no humans, so Adagio's form did not register as anything to creatures and constructs without want, nor curiosity, that acted as guards.
As such the pair made it to where they were sent.
A pair of cages set upon a burning rise surrounded by a pool of lava. Making their way across the land bridge the pair of them stopped before the pitiful looking black and red creature huddled in the cage before them, the thing piteously moaning for aid.
"Oh shut up or I will tear your legs off again, they are clearly not buying it." A voice snapped from the other cage nearby.
Tirek snarled at the other cage. "How would you know that!"
"Because we are not buying it." Adagio sighed.
"Well whatever you are still close enough!" Tirek laughed his mouth opening to drain these fools, only for nothing to happen.
"What!" Tirek cried only for Squall's fist to impact the centaur's nose sending him crashing back in the cage as his head snapped back.
"HAH!" the other cages occupant cackled.
"I would rather leave you here to rot as last time you showed up i had to suffer through a few weeks of what my father considers 'Family time', but you're on the list." Adagio huffed moving around the cage to grab the centaurs tail, a slash of a knife cutting the black hair short leaving her with a hand full of bristles which she bound with a cord before dumping a potion on it. A few potion logged black vines tangling in the hairs. She tossed this back in the cage as Squall picked the lock and drug the weakened centaur out, forcing the beast down the stairs where they would open a portal to leave before it was noticed he was gone.
A number of parasitic vines grew, wrapping around the severed tail, the energy from them matching Tirek's and would for a time.
"You, human girl. Let me out, I can be useful as well."
Adagio turned to the figure in the other cage approaching curiously.
"Not many know what this form is. But you're not on the list, Forgescale." Adagio stated looking up at the rearing dragon.
"So you have heard of me." The dragon god smirked.
"Hard not to, you were a fairly big deal before that bearded ass got to you. Same as he did to me." Adagio growled. " And neither of us really got to kill the fool."
"He's dead?" the dragon grumbled and frowned. "Who are you then that the bearded meat sack would bother to deal with."
"Not important at the moment I only have a little bit of time with no one watching." Adagio offered and pulled a gem from a pocket, and tossed the emerald to the dragon. "Eat that and don't fight the connection. The messenger flame shouldn't be blocked by anything in Tartarus. I'll send you more information later."
"And I should bind myself to you even this much why?" Forgescale growled.
"Because I'm the only way you might even get out of here. " Adagio smirked." Besides nothing you went after when you were free the first time affected anything I want to own. So I have just as much reason to free you as leave you here."
"Hmmm."
"Can you read pony?"
"I can read human language, it was that or go mad. The streets of Sesame were adequate for that training."
"I am very curious about that, but later. Soon as we are out I'll send you something to help or at least distract you some." Adagio offered heading over to where Squall had Tirek in an arm bar and was staring at her as if to tell her to hurry up.
Forgescale watched the human and the yeti go before looking at the twisted black vines now filling the other cage.
He considered a moment before eating the gem, feeling a connection take hold, if nothing else the emerald was tasty.
Perhaps an hour later he coughed a flicker of flame and a book fell out of it. He glanced to it curiously, noting it was written in what the blue monster had called English.
He had liked the blue monster, the little red one needed to be destroyed however.
"So you have been displaced from time, By Twilight Sparkle, fourth edition." the dragon read.
