Thomas, a human, has appeared in the magical land of Equestria, though it is much different from the show. Ponies of this world are all anthros. What's more, Thomas has been assigned as Princess Luna's royal concubine.
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Nice to see Talon and Moonlight care so much about Thomas and that they have plans to help him out. I also liked how strong the friendship between Talon and Moonlight has become and that Talon ships Moonlight with Thomas. Keep up the great job.
6470086 Awesome to hear.
Yaaaay ! More Moonlight ! o/
6470474 Working on it.
I wonder what Tomas' reaction would have been to seeing Moonlight with nothing on? Anyway, if you want to develop other characters without Tomas in a story about Tomas it can be done. However, it somehow has to fit the premise of the story, which I believe is a human with issues trying to adapt to life in a different universe with completely different norms than he is used to. You might can go into some of this norms like you did with the explanation of coolers and Heat Week. That's just my opinion though. BTW, just who is going to have that awkward conversation with Tomas anyway?
6470961 Thank you.
Won't be relevant until the next heat actually comes around.
you know i have always liked these kinds of role reversal stories where the females are dominate and the males are submissive, but here is something i feel is often overlooked is that the females end up getting the duties of both gender roles aka being both the provider, guardian and the emotional backbone where as the males fill little more then a walking talking cock in the relationship. the only herd based major role switch story i have seen address this has basically had the males be minor stay at home moms and referees for mare in the herd. as someone writing this kind of story i really want to see you address the male side of herding relationships if possible.
either way another good chapter, loved the byplay between talon and moonlight. i look froward to read more chapters
6471463 I understand what it's like to enjoy a genre but being pissed off by certain recurring tropes. The various Xenophilia stories have yet to disappoint in this particular regard, but I'd also recommend Dusk Shine's Saga http://www.fimfiction.net/story/206699/dusk-shines-saga
Appreciated. And I look forward to exploring this dynamic as well.
This chapter was sweet, knowing the other characters truly care about the chimp~
This is a nice break from the usual flow of events. Helps build Talon and Moonlight, while also giving their perspective on what's going on with Thomas. It all fits well within the story.
6471576 Happy you think so.
6471629 Glad it worked out like that. Thank you.
Oh Moonlight, you can deny it all you want but there are only two people who don't already know the truth; you and Thomas. I'm rather sure Luna has already noticed.
Just wanting for that lateral move from concubine guard to concubine.
Talon needs to stop pussyfooting around and just drag the smartycorn to her nest and have her wicked way with her, preferably while Tia wants, or even better, participates!
6472055 Baby steps, my friend. Baby steps.
This was a awesome read ,And we get not only learn more about there frindship but see how couse there frindship is .
6472299 Yay.
ship it
6473374 Neat.
best
story
ever
read
but i got a question, will there be any actions that causes some human tech. to land in Equestria or your gonna stay away from that subject
im just curious
6473643 Thank you so much.
Haven't even considered it. Thus far, the only element of humanity in Equestria is Thomas and what he brought with him.
While i do understand there is an entire universe going on outside of thomas i feel i should say this.
He is still the main character of this story so anything that doesnt further develop the story around him, in my opinion, is just filler we don't necessarily need to know.
On another note i do love this story and sincerely hope moony will at one point reel thomas in to, (in the best ways i can expect tali to say it) "tap that"
6475732 Fair enough.
Your desire seems relatively common. I wonder if I'll give in to peer pressure on it.
6476105 like again i love the story im just voicing my opinion
6478046 More like timid because of his depression. As for being bipedal and having hands, why would that matter? Having only tertiary knowledge of his descriptions, they have no idea what to think. Plus, discovery of a new sentient creature is a lot more far fetched than simply finding a new kind of animal.
what gonna happen next?
6478278 People keep asking that, but I'm never able to give any answer but "something involving naked horse people."
6478344 The sentiment is shared.
Well I can agree that Midnight and Thomas would be cute together. Hell, Midnight is just such a cutie by herself that I want to see more of her.
Excellent job making a story that, on the outside, looks like clop, but on the inside is actually deeply thought out and well executed. I'm thoroughly enjoying the ride so far, and am a little sad that it's got to pause for now.
Though on an unrelated note, I'm wondering what your views on character submissions are.
6483737 Happy to have another reader who gets it.
6483810 It's Moonlight, not Midnight.
Thank you very much.
What are those?
I like the story so far! :)
I hope that Thomas ends up with Moonlight and Talon.
They would make such an adorable herd!
7689927 Kind of spoilery. You'll just have to wait and see.
ch27
affectionately
...Umm, Is Moonlight not in the know of Blueblood's retcon "job", or is this chapter just not updated to the retcon yet?
9416755
She is not in the know. His job can almost be described as espionage with how he distributes misinformation, so the fewer who know the better.
Moonlight and Thomas huh? I'd ship it.
9855867
Funnily enough, I didn't at first. The original plan was for them to just be friends, but so many people wanted it that I gave into peer pressure.
Pretty close. Men are generally more physically aggressive.
10938105
Yup. That's kinda the point. Thomas is kind of out of place everywhere, yet is still welcomed by this bunch of pervy equines.