As the ponies watch you expectantly, a sly thought crosses your mind. Perhaps you can have a bit of fun with this. “It’s so great to see you here today!” you announce, making eye contact with each pony in the audience in turn. “As you know, I am the Brony Hero, nee Coppola, nee Power Man, otherwise known as Hollywood actor Nicholas Cage.”
To your surprise there is a long gasp from the audience, and a pony at the back shouts “it’s the Ghost Rider!” before fainting.
“Oh…” You trail off, scratching your head awkwardly. You had hoped that you’d be able to trick the ponies into thinking you were a famous actor back on Earth, but somehow they seem to recognise the name. Perhaps Nicholas Cage’s fame is universal?
“So you… know about Hollywood actors?” you venture, looking to the mayor.
“Oh yes!” she trills happily. “Princess Celestia enjoys showing your films at the Canterlot theatre, Mr Cage! We all think you’re amazing!” All the ponies in the audience suddenly start to clap and cheer.
You stroke your chin as you realise what is happening. Whilst the ponies are obviously big fans of Nicholas Cage, as all sane people are, they probably can’t tell humans apart. To the average pony, you look exactly the same as the devilishly handsome Mr Cage.
“That’s right!” you spread your arms in triumph. “I am Nicholas Cage; I live in a mansion and every night I read Action Comics issue one before I sleep!”
A little white unicorn head pops up in the middle of the crowd. You smile – it is none other than Sweetie Belle, the cute little filly sister of Rarity. “Mr Cage, Mr Cage!” she squeaks over the din of the cheering crowd. “My sister loves you! I know she’s busy but please please please come and see her!”
You are about to respond, when a yellow pony with an image of a jar of honey on her flank clambers desperately onto the stage, looking at you with wild eyes. “No, Mr Cage, you must come with me!” she cries, throwing herself at your knees.
“Get off my knees!” you shout, brushing the strange pony off you. “Who are you, and why are you better than Rarity?”
The pony looked up at you. “My name is Honey Trap!” she gasps out. “And I know the location of the Time Orb, but only the unique talents of Nicholas Cage can possibly rescue it!”
Rarity or your mission – what a choice!
What will you do?
Go with Sweetie Belle to see Rarity
Go with Honey Trap to find the Time Orb
Okay, now I believe that we could get Nick Cage to star in a movie made out of this. He never refuses a movie, no matter how stupid!
I LOVE RARITY, BUT THE TIME ORB (sob)
Up yours Rarity, this place has killed me at least ten times. Brony out.
Rarity or saving the world...
PFFT like that's a choice, let's go Sweetie Belle.
i want to go and suduce rarity
but...
honey trap is just too sexy of a name not to be something cool
wait
wait
OH GOD
NOOOOO
honey trap is spyspeak for someone who uses seduction to lure in the mark!
RARITY
YES DEFINATELY RARITY
Meh I can see her later . let's get that timeorb
Hmm a pony that has the word Trap in its name "that can only end well"
510907 NOOOOOOOOOOOOO, it's a trick!!
cdn.instanttrap.com/trap.jpg
A TRAP, IT IS!
(Couldn't believe no one else posted this image.)
I watched Archer, I know what Honey Trap means! NOPENOPENOEP
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What a coincidence, while reading this, I'm channel surfing and they just happen to be giving the Ghost Rider movie on FX right now!
oh god no ty "honey trap"
RARITY IS BEST PONY
"All the ponies in the audience suddenly start to clap and cheer."
Should say clop?
"Rarity or your mission – what a choice!"
What choice?
Rarity, duh.
Honey trap? I know where this is going...
THE BEES! OH GOD THEY'RE IN MY EYES!
Pffft, as if that's even a choice
Oh. Saying I'm Nick Cage is a good thing.
Fuck yes.
And no, Rarity, I will not go with you, even if Honey Trap probably wants to kill me. YOU'RE ANNOYING.
A pony named Honey Trap cannot possibly be good news.
Clearly I have no choice but to follow her.
Jack Nicholson => Nicholas Cage => Johnny Cage
And with this video, we come full circle
I actually think Discord would have been cooler if his name was Nicholas. It has "chaos" in it, it's not generic like "Discord", Twilight said "necklace" in a way that sounded like "Nicholas", and Discord was imprisoned for a thousand years. (Cage)
How the heck does Honey Trap know I'm looking for the time orb? Kinda sus...
Oof. Lesse Rarity.