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You wake up as the warm rays of Celestia’s sun shine through your bedroom window. No, not Celestia’s sun! You narrow your eyes in hatred at the pale imitation hanging outside your window, shackled by logic and physics, shaking your fist at it from the comfort of your bed.
From downstairs, you can smell bacon being fried as your mum cooks breakfast. You lick your lips and pull on the pair of boxers that looks least used as you prepare to start the day.
You are a brony. Or as you prefer to call yourself, an ‘Animated Equine Enthusiast’. Standing in front of the mirror, you flex your toned brony muscles and admire your physique. Like most bronies you are a closet intellectual, spending your time between the appreciation of great works of literature, promoting the ethos of ‘love and tolerance’ through your myriad charity work, and working a twelve hour shift at McDonalds.
“Darling, it’s breakfast time! Num nums!” your mum calls up sweetly. You ignore her, wading through the bin-bags that litter the floor of your bedroom and collapse onto your swivel chair. Your computer sits in front of you, that glorious glowing rectangle through which you experience the full richness of life.
“If only it was real…” you murmur sadly, as you stroke the Fluttershy hugging pillow that sits propped by your desk when it’s not in use. “If only…” You look at your computer and then at the pile of empty Mountain Dew bottles that cover the floor.
What will you do?
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. And Mountain Dew shrinks your genitals
, so I'm gonna go ahead and look for ponies.
ok so far DEFININATLY NOT ME... the first part was close but when the mom said breakfest time, yeah me no get fed much... oh well i have medication that makes me lose my appaitite so i don't mind the lack of food... continues reading ... um i'm a fluttershy fan and all and i want the fluttershy ending but i'm not sure i would go as far as to suduce the pillow... da what the hell lets get some laughs out of this.
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too hard for me to connect with him.
what does it mean if when you look up on google images "DAT PILLOW" and get this
Image: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Owe3cEhhfBg/TiTPXEulKwI/AAAAAAAAIv4/gYBkyRLNXrY/s1600/36363+-+bed+celestia+dat_flank+pillow+pose+scroll.jpg
So this is horribly mediocre, but this part in particular caught my attention in the worst way.
>you murmur sadly, as you stroke the Fluttershy hugging pillow that sits propped by your desk when it’s not in use.
MFW
Image: http://i.imgur.com/izgq6.jpgAlso, when it's not in use? What the fucking fuckity fuck fuck does that mean? Wait, actually, I don't want to know.
I haven't even made it past the first paragraph of the first chapter and I've already gone off on a mini rant and silently screamed F**k You at my laptop.
This is going to be amazing.
Ps. I was scrolling down to write this comment, saw the picture of Celestia, and am now more than slightly horrified of what this fic has to inspire that in its first chapter. Again, this is going to be amazing.
All Right i learnt my lesson dont leave the house and use the Computer it solves all your problems.
Image: http://www.thepunch.com.au/images/uploads/work_main2222.jpg
I was well on my way to making one of these. It was pretty close to being done. They you beat me too it. Now there's not point anymore. xD I read the 'choose your own adventure' books back when I was a kid and wanted to make one, but what will I look like when this one is so much better and mine just seems like a cheap copy? Props to you! This is awesome. 
Pegasister high five! 
Browse the internet for pony.
Yes. A thousand times, yes.
Go to the shops and buy ten gallons of Mountain Dew
Ick. I only drink Pepsi, a real man's drink.
<Seduce the Fluttershy pillow
<Seduce Fluttershy pillow
<Seduce Fluttershy
NO.
I can't even begin to describe the searing embarassment I'd feel for having such thoughts in her presence, let alone actually acting on them. She's just too cute, pure and innocent.
I'm interested in where I could make the story go, so I'll pick the first one.
So, I read the whole thing, bouncing through all the options.
Wow the character was a horrible jerk I mean, I kick Pinkie Pie half to death and make her cry on the floor, traumatize Apple Bloom for life with my face as her Cutie Mark, embarrass myself repeatedly, get myself killed trying to seduce most of the ponies except for Rarity, where I'm beaten half to death by Nicholas Cage, or Applejack, where I'm turned into a slave. Fluttershy also enslaves me, I could marry Trixie or try to make her the Princess only to be enslaved again, get burned to death in a Trojan Pony, or otherwise die in many stupid ways. That's not counting how the guy just outright acts like a complete ass whenever he's around anyone...nothing he does is good.
It was absolutely hilarious.
Thats probably enough to make someone go sterile. 
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