• Member Since 22nd Nov, 2015

Dlaf rferg


Tin loaf /tɪn ləʊf/ (adjective) - To be desired or approved of; a good thing.

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Total Words: 11,024,730
Estimated Reading: 4 weeks

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Two decades after the banishment of Nightmare Moon, her shadow still lingers. Princess Celestia has been left to tend the Twin Thrones alone and protect us all from those who would see Equestria crumble. Our enemies take many forms: some would tear the world down with their claws, others with their smiles. They are monsters all the same.

I have had many names, and I have been many things. Today I am Swift Sweep, and I work for the Equestrian Bureau for State Security.


Special thanks:
NCMares (DeviantArt) for the gorgeous cover art.
Octavia Harmony: primary beta reader and editor throughout the many months of production.
PaulAsaran: for great help with and feedback on plot development and initial story drafting.
Kleora, Cerulean Voice, Nonagon: for further help with editing and story development.

Chapters (14)
E
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Vinyl and Octavia need to hug for eight hours – or the building explodes.


A commission for Dakastan, edited by MrNumbers. Special thanks to him, and to Crystal Wishes for the ornithological help.


Patreon. Ko-fi. Picture of me looking handsome

Chapters (9)
T
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This story is a sequel to Triptych


The war touched everypony, even those far from the fighting. Compass Rose was affected more than most when gryphons appeared far behind the front lines, and the aftermath left her unwillingly in the company of an enemy soldier.

Set in the same universe as Off The Edge Of The Map, Apotheosis, and Triptych.

Editing by Kaorin.
Spanish translation by SPANIARD KIWI available here.

Chapters (21)
T

Madeleine Crumpet: A world-trotting jeweler with an eye for gems… and pleasant company. Of the stallion persuasion.

Rubyk of Trotheim: A cold noble of the forbidden Equestrian North.

What cause could bring these two unlikely figures together?

“My dear, you will not believe what happened to me on my last islands trip. I can scarcely believe it myself! But a girl doesn’t often get to help out in an affair like that. It was just like a Shadow Spade novel! Although that pony – Mister Rubyk – was about as far from the grand dame of mystery as you can get. I suppose it takes all sorts.”

"Oh, Mister Rubyk? Let me tell you dear, stallions don't come like him very often. There's just something about him – other than being the tallest in the room by a country mile. And when he smiles… brrr! Don't believe me? Well, then just let me tell you what he did when we found the body..."

*****

[Update August 5, 2017: To address some of the legitimate reader concerns regarding the length of the several sections, in-line chapter headings within the story sections themselves have been added. A Google Docs version containing links to individual chapter headings is forthcoming. The author owes a sincere thanks to those who have reviewed this story to-date and hopes that this change will help to address some of the difficulties that he made for himself in posting this novel as he did.]

Chapters (4)
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SF (canon species only; no humans) Ponies were magically and genetically engineered to be the perfect servitor race. They are powerful, adaptable, intelligent and completely under the control of their creators. A laboratory accident frees one such pony from her mental chains, but how can one mare save herself and the rest of her kind if she doesn't even know she's a slave?
This is not the Equestria you know and these are not your little ponies... not yet, anyway.

Tags: Adventure, Diamond Dogs, Gryphons, NO HUMANS (did I mention that already?)
Other tags: historical, mind control, Clarke's 3rd Law, excessive use of high energy physics, before they were famous.
Detailed review by PaulAsaran.
Cover art by endrome , used with permission.
Russian translation (partial -- 'unofficially' completed in the comments)
A Soot-Covered World, book 1.

Chapters (33)
E

Distance can drive us apart. It can also bring us closer together.

After all is said and done, and the ponies have gone their separate ways, the only way they have to keep in touch is through letters.

Original Equestria Daily post is here
Russian translation
Chinese translation
Polish translation
Spanish translation

Now with music and audiobook

Chapters (1)
T
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In a sunburned Equestria, Rarity leads the pleasant life of a clothier in the tiny town of Spurhoof. She’s got a successful business, a capable assistant, and the respect of the place she’s called home for six years. Maybe she never achieved her foalhood dreams of fabulosity, but at least she’s comfortable. What more can a mare ask for?

Then a band of outlaws decide to pay Spurhoof a visit, and their leader’s eye has settled upon Rarity. Soon she’ll have to fight not only for her life, but maybe her very soul. Will her diamond turn dull under the hot Equestrian sun, or will adversity make her shine all the brighter?


Print copies now available for purchase on Lulu!.


Now featured on Equestria Daily.

Inspired by Fallout: Equestria and the song Bulletproof Heart by My Chemical Romance.

Other stories inspired by music:
Escape
Ordinary World
Bed of Roses
Drops of Jupiter
How to Save a Life
Forgive Me, Friend
Time for Tea

A big thanks to my brainstorming fellow and ever-awesome friend SorenPixels, who has helped me ponder the plans for this story since its inception.

Additional kudos to Danger Beans and Cerulean Voice for their help with the first few chapters.

Big thanks to the fantastic author Viking ZX for taking time out of his busy schedule to be my Alpha pre-reader.

Last but certainly not least, my gratitude to my gang of Beta pre-readers: Babroniedad, Lord-Commander, Merc the Jerk, Snowybee, Soge, and Wanderer D!


I was not prepared for the absolutely stunning world building or the incredibly well done characters. [...] This is a work of absolute art. — Equstarte Marine Sebaste

Reading and re-reading (and re-reading) this story was an amazing experience. It will always be one of my favorites! — Wanderer D

I dare say this is a masterpiece of the fandom. — FanOfMostEverything

It's a gorgeous, vivid-drawn setting you've crafted for this, and it hits its gritty Western beats and epic scope with aplomb. Rarity's character journey in this is a stellar one, and her gradual sink into (and recovery at the brink of) [...] darkness was wonderfully and believably told. — Carabas

Cover art commissioned from the fantastic bakki, with title work generously donated by Novel-Idea.

Chapters (27)
T
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When the Royal Wedding scatters defeated changelings all over Equestria, a member of the hive winds up being captured in Ponyville, tied up, stunned, repeatedly shot by a cannon, and held against his will.

The truly frightening part is he’s starting to like it.

Thank you to my twisted editors: Tek, Seether00, GameKnut, Cerulean Blue and Peter
The picture Pinkie Pie uses Party Canon is from Atmospark at DeviantArt

This story is listed as comedy⁽*⁾ because the author has an odd sense of humor. No changelings were harmed⁽¹⁾ during the production of this story, despite what the newspapers printed or the ongoing lawsuit from the ESPCA⁽²⁾. The management would like to remind all readers to spay and neuter your pets. Unless your pet is a changeling, in which case…


(*) Dark humor, to be exact. If you are someone who finds pleasure in the misfortune of others, enjoys watching the occasional inept chainsaw juggler or cheers during a NASCAR crash, welcome home. Also, get help.

(1) Excluding blunt trauma, thermal impingement, chemical exposure, radiation, thaumaturgic infusions, and confetti ingestion. All characters represented, including changelings, are the exclusive property of Hasbro, no matter what they may shout at you from between the bars of their cell. Any violence or pain inflicted on the changeling in this story was simulated on a stunt changeling with special effects and mirrors. Except for the cannon. There is no truth to the rumor that Queen Chrysalis provided the stunt changelings from a supply of disobedient changelings in her dungeon⁽³⁾.

(2) Equestrian Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Arthropods

(3) The Changeling Kingdom does not have dungeons. They have Call Centers. It explains a lot, actually.


Here is a link to some appropriate background music to listen to while reading: Piotr Tchaikovneigh’s 1812 Overture

Additional Note: This story is tagged Sex because it has the occasional reference to… well, sex. There are no explicit references, but there are things.

Chapters (21)
E
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Wake up. Go to work. Save Ponyville from unimaginable horrors beyond time and space. Have lunch with your PFF.

Ditzy Doo lives in a different world than her fellow ponies. She sees things nopony else can see—like higher-dimensional spatial anomalies, fae creatures, and eldritch abominations. And she uses what she sees to solve problems that nopony else even knows about.

But this time, Ditzy may have bitten off more than she can chew. Something very unfriendly is trying to enter Equestria through Ponyville’s Town Hall. An earth pony with an hourglass cutie mark has taken an unhelpful interest in Ditzy. The Princess’s personal student has grown suspicious. And, most irritating of all, her alarm clock radio is acting strangely.

Ditzy must race against the clock to save Ponyville—a clock that keeps playing the same song over, and over, and over ...

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Traducción al español por SPANIARD KIWI aquí.
———

Many thanks to everyone who preread and edited my WORDS WORDS WORDS:

Japanese Teeth
Sessalisk
Sereg
Kuroi Tsubasa Tenshi
CDRW
Clever Pun
Connelly
Justanotherbrony

Cover art assembled by yours truly, using a Derpy vector by Sierraex.

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Shoop boopy boop boop doop bedoop.

Chapters (11)
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Twilight has given you a new book to read. Well, she didn't exactly give it to you, you actually just found it in the back of the library. Behind a shelf. On the ground. It looks very old, downright ancient, and it smells like moss and rot. The binding is a little cracked, and there's no title on it. You can't help but wonder what might be inside, and the only way to find out is to keep reading.

Just turn the page.

You can do that much, can't you?

Please?




WARNING: This story contains brief depictions of blood, mild violence, and death, and has ARG aspects to it. It plays with formatting, and includes images. Some "pages" are long, some are only a few words. It is written in first person, to you, the reader, and is a slow mellow horror. You've been warned.

This story relies on unusual formatting for some parts, and thus may not be as enjoyable on a tablet or phone, or if you have specialized custom Fimfic settings.

If you post spoilers, hints, or answers in the comments, please be sure to spoiler them out or warn others. You don't want to ruin the fun, right?

Audio reading: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=28TqbHFchLg

Chapters (59)