Twilight reads a book about literature and, analysing her world, decides that everything she does is planned by someone other than her.

She does not take it very well.

Rated Everyone for adult humour.

now with a reading

Twilight Sparkle never was a Unicorn and she didn't even know it.
What happens when her true heritage comes to light? Will she willingly embrace it? Or will she be forced to?

Beware of spoilers in the comments!

Edited by uTTerAbsurdity, Zervziel, Stormwatch and Gwenio

Cover art by the talented Cartoonlion and colored by the equally talented Stormwatch, original can be found here

Click here for the Tvtropes page

A story lovingly ripped off from the Futurama episode of the same name.

Twilight gathers the girls to her basement to reveal her latest invention. Unfortunately, they get distracted by another of her inventions: the 'What If" machine, a device capable of answering any 'what if' question posed to it. Follow along as the mane six discover the improbable scenarios that could have been their lives.

There was only one explanation. For all of it. All of the strange, erratic behavior. Her irrational fear of the sun. Her nocturnal habits of locking herself in in the dark and closing all the blinds. Wearing her sunglasses everywhere, even inside! It was time to invest in some silver, garlic, and a wooden stake.

Pinkie Pie can be very unpredictable, but chaining ponies up in her basement? Seems like she's crossing the line from "just being Pinkie Pie" to "may need to be stopped before somepony gets hurt." What will become of her victims?

(Fans of weight-gain material may want to apply heehee)

Obsession. That's a funny little word. It can mean oh so many things to oh so many ponies. They tell me that I've got an obsession. And you know what? They're right. With what, you ask? Why, that's simple: the Elements of Harmony. I have watched and stalked after them my whole life, only now do they take form.
My Whole life has been one long quest, one long lust, after the Elements. But is it not the powers of Harmony nor the mares themselves that I crave, no. I desire their antithesis: Gloom, Penury, Faithlessness, Facility, and Spite. I shall assign them to the ponies who best represent these forces. Why do this? Simple really. Because I must and because I can. Yet of these two forces the second in the greater; I do this because I choose to.
And in the end history will remember me as a hero.

Cauterium

Celestia has had enough of half-arsed promises from her loyal subjects. It's time to wear a different hat.

Also on: DeviantArt

Pinkie longs to meet Mosh Whiplash, the only pony who parties harder than she does. Unfortunately, he prefers ponies of the plumper persuasion, and unless she can overcome her own metabolism, she won't even get to see him again. Can she put on the necessary weight before he leaves town?

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Yeah, this is one of my weirder stories. I did on request from a forum buddy of mine, and figured I'd use the opportunity to experiment with the style and with writing a type of story I don't usually do. It could probably stand to go through a couple more revisions, but I don't think it's too bad in it's current form.

There's nothing blatantly sexual in here, but the whole "getting fat to impress somepony" thing is bound to weird some people out, so I'm bumping the rating up to teen just to be on the safe side.

Also, the song Mosh is singing is Andrew WK's "Party Hard". Given that Andrew WK is basically Pinkie Pie in human form (seriously, look at his twitter) it seemed fitting.

Perhaps Doctor Whooves is not a medical doctor or a time lord, but a doctor of psychology.

The following are his journals after he receives instructions from Princess Celestia to permanently set up shop in Ponyville to keep an eye on Twilight Sparkle and her friends, where he learns more than he bargained for.

View the Google Docs table of contents: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gCeHce9BTZ48P5fxNQDHq7diYlNqJIbkZNdMGLN3H5k/edit?pli=1

Sly Clop is a laid back slacker who runs one of Ponyville's only porn shops on Soresaddle Street. He is a regular customer of Hard Cider's "gentlecolt's club", the Knife and Apple, where he regularly shoots the breeze with Rainbow Dash, who's seen better days.

One day, his only employee quits, and he's forced to hire a new one, starting a new awkward relationship with Lyra, who needs cash. What follows is a lighthearted fic with dark undertones that I hope you'll enjoy.

And if I haven't convinced you enough by this point, no, this not a clopfic.

New cover image by mickf18 on deviantART (DeusExKane here).