Taming the Beast
I stared, hopelessly confused. Was I having a literal conversation with myself?
She spoke, this time in a much more refined manner. "I'm kidding." Her feral eyes were lit with amusement.
"Where am I? Who are you?"
"Well, in your head! And I'm you, of course!"
My throat went dry.
"Well, at least the more canine side of y—SQUIRREL!" Her head suddenly darted off into space.
...
"I'm kidding again!" she cackled. Her laugh was throaty. "Oh, that never gets old."
"Right," I said slowly, unsure of the lycan's intentions. "So, err, what brings you to my head?"
"I should be asking you that. Do you like what I've done with the place?" She twirled around on her clawed hooves, humming a familiar tune before falling down, splayed on her back.
"It's very...clean."
She didn't seem very hostile. Nothing like that voice, constantly whispering of dominance and pack mentality. She was quirky, but friendly.
She laughed again. "You don't have to lie. You're me, remember?" She stood up, trotting over unsteadily, almost dancing as she poked me on the nose. "I know all your secrets."
Suddenly she didn't seem very friendly.
"I hear all of your thoughts." She clucked her tongue, her eyes flashing wickedly. "Oh yes. Those niggling doubts in the back of your head, your insecurities..." She grinned wolfishly, turning around, flicking her tail in my face.
Not friendly at all.
"I'm only you, but better."
I glanced up sharply, my eyes flashing.
Hostile.
"Aha, there it is." She pointed. "That look. I've been waiting to see that."
"What do you want?"
"You, of course! I get so bored in here. I only want to come out and play," she said sweetly, as if it was the most obvious thing. "You have no idea what it feels like, being trapped in a cage. Or maybe you do."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"All your miserable life, you've been caged in like a dog inside that mansion of yours. Quite the gilded cage."
I shook my head. "You have no idea what you're talking about."
"Don't I? I'm you, after all. I suspect," she grinned toothily, "that I know you better than anypony." She trotted around in a circle. "Your parents..."
I glared. "Don't you dare—"
The lycan turned to look me in the eye with a pathetic look, brushing a strand of her straggly mane. "They never loved you."
"You're lying."
"And now you've moved to another cage. Only this time, your cage is a little more trashy and now you have a...roommate, don't you?" she snickered. "She's got you on a tight leash, doesn't she?"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Stop playing dumb!" she roared. "You and I both know she has you wrapped around her hoof like some kind of pet."
"You're wrong."
"Maybe I should speak in musical terms so this gets through your hard head!" She raised her voice higher, circling me now. "You're always going to be bass. The accompaniment to the melody. Playing second fiddle. You're never going to be first chair cellist because you're weak. And only one of us can be alpha."
"You think I care about that nonsense?" I snapped.
"Maybe you don't. But I won't have some weakling blessed with this power sitting around with idle hooves."
I fumed.
"Look at you, sniveling. Compassion is the enemy," she barked. "Mercy defeats us!"
I clenched my jaw, tensing my body. I could feel the changes starting to happen. But this time, instead of unbridled rage, I felt something else. Tranquility. A calm fury. I could feel the claws starting to prick out of my hooves. My fangs filling my mouth, lining my jaw with razor sharp teeth. My senses grew sharper. Everything became clear, though there wasn't much to see, smell, or hear. The only thing I had to focus my anger on was the creature in front of me.
"I'm keeping my body."
"Oho. Going to hit me now?" The lycan leaned in, giving me a clear shot at her jaw. "Here, I'll give you an easy one."
In the blink of an eye I swung my hoof wildly, managing to connect with the underside of jaw with a sickening crack. The sucker punch threw her off her feet and onto her back.
"Not bad! It still doesn't change the fact that your mother doesn't love you!"
"Shut up!" Another punch, right to her muzzle. Blood streamed freely from her broken nose. If I hadn't wanted to throttle her so much I would have been disgusted with getting my coat stained.
"Did she ever hug you? Kiss you goodnight?" she taunted. "You were never good enough for her, Octy."
My anger flared even more at her usage of my beloved nickname. "Shut up!" I swiped at her, my claws raking at her coat.
"Always average, always making mistakes. You could never satisfy her. She always wanted a unicorn."
"SHUT UP!" I tackled her, screaming, frothing at the mouth.
"Not a friend in the world!"
"SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"
There was nothing left but the sound of me slowly crushing her throat with my hooves. She gasped with a wet gurgle and I tightened my grip, feeling her struggle for air.
"I'm glad we could work things out," she rasped. "Although technically, you're trying to strangle yourself right now."
I released the death grip I had around her neck, huffing and puffing. She rolled over onto her side, bruised and battered. "Wow, oh wow, you've got a mean right hook. Listen, what I said about Vinyl..."
I lunged forward to kick her right in the gut, hearing a rib break. She groaned.
"Ow! That hurts, you know!"
"Save it," I bristled.
"No, listen, listen! That's your problem, you never listen!" She sighed. "Why can't you be more assertive out there? What you have with Vinyl is wonderful."
"Really now? Then why am I here, with you?" I hissed bitterly, staring down at my claws. I dug them into the ground.
"Maybe because you love her."
I glanced up, frowning.
She shrugged. "I don't know, seeing as you don't even know."
"Yes, well, I'm starting to have second thoughts about her. She's nothing but trouble," I found myself saying. She nearly jumped when I felt her wrap her hooves around my neck from behind, giving me a tender hug.
"Maybe she is, maybe she isn't. But right now, she's not the enemy. The Silver Horseshoes, remember? Or did you already forget?"
Vinyl was the answer. I caught glimpses of her out of the corner of my eye, felt her presence everywhere I went. And like it or not, I needed her right now.
I murmured, "Squirrel."
"Octy! Octy! Wake up!"
I thrashed, trying to fight off my invisible attacker. I snapped my eyes open, gasping. "Vinyl!"
She held me down, trying to soothe me with her presence. "Sh, shh. I'm here. It's alright. Are you okay?" Vinyl hugged me tighter and tighter.
I saw a cut on her leg. "Vinyl! You're hurt!"
She pushed me away. "Stuff it. Had a bad dream?"
When you're waking up, the world is a blur. What was clear in a dream, suddenly makes no sense.
"You could say that."
These moments, blinding as snow, they change you. You die and live again, remade. Reborn anew, able to wield the darkness inside. Wielding the shadow. They say there are various stages of grief. I had still been grieving, not for the loss of a loved one, but for myself. I'd thought I'd lost myself that night. It seemed so far away. First came denial. I was trying to pretend that nothing changed. I'd tried to lie to myself, and hopefully trick my brain into thinking that I was still the same mare I'd always been. I refused to accept reality. Then came anger. And I was angry. But instead of expressing that anger in a constructive, wholesome manner I let it fester. I kept it bottled up inside as long as I could, until I'd been given a good shake, ready to explode.
"You okay?"
I glanced down at my claws and then at her, smiling at my reflection. I gave Vinyl a sloppy lick on the cheek.
"Eugh, gross! H-Hey, get off!"
I lapped at her cut, giggling as she tried to push me off. It was almost morning. And things were all right. I'd reached the final stage:
Acceptance.
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BITCH YOU AIN'T FIRST
I REALLY SHOULD HAVE COMBINED THIS CHAPTER AND THE PREVIOUS ONE TOGETHER
I HAVE THIS PROBLEM OF MAKING THINGS INTO CHAPTERS FOR THE SAKE OF CLIFFHANGERS
And now for angry mythological trans-species sex.
Hooray.
1042100
nerddogueto.com.br/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/i-know-that-feel-bro.jpg
It updated!
Dennis, you troll, you
1042100
You really, really do.
Though I suppose a majority of authors on this site have cliffhanger-itis by now X_x
1042100 I hope I'm not second.
"Comedy"
Yeah okay.
I'm still liking this though.
huzzah update!!
also, the 502 has RETURNED.
Hmm... This is becoming a bit of a psychology mind bender. I like that.
5/5
1042100
True,but I can see why you didn't. First was Octavia seeing the consequences of Vinyl's actions and what she is willing to do for her. This chapter was a dream sequence with Octavia finally accepting what she was. Now she can finally hope to control herself.
1042137
I second that! So Octy can control herself now after that beat down she gave... herself I guess?
1042141Me being one of them.
Such a good ending for this. I'm glad she has accapted herself now and that she and Vinyl can eventually work themselves oit. Or something. I didn't want to give ot a chance at first simply because of the name, but then I did just cause. And I am glad I did. Like I said, It's really good. If I hadn't read, it would have been my loss. So thanks for writing, and I can't wait to see what's next.
1042100love this song and chapter
I want say that Octavia has some self=esteem issues, but...
Considering all she's had to deal with, it's amazing she's as well-adjusted as she is.
Aww...
Wow another chapter so fast?
Dennis the Menace
Cliffhangers are good, as long as they are well written and fun. Just don't over work yourself.
Am beting Vinyl has a history with that Silver Streak pony.
Yes! New Chapter!
And Octy is over her depression! For now. Dennis only knows how long until she's popping pills and killing mobsters.
On an unrelated note- THE 502 HAS RETURNED! FLEE! FLEE FOR YOUR LIVES!
1042100
Huzza good sir ( or Mam) you have made this my favorite pairing. and you did it almost single handedly. I love this story. I was and still a big TwiDash fan though.
1042211 not just you
1042363
OH GOD I SNORTED MONSTER ALL OVER MY KEYBOARD
NOW WE'LL HAVE TO WAIT
sorry but i just couldn't let this go...
"I'd thought I'd lost myself that night"
if you expand that you would get...
"I would thought I would lost myself that night"
To me that just screams bad grammar and wrong tense usage. It could be...
"I thought I would have lost myself that night"
"I thought I would lose myself that night"
personally I prefer the second one because it is more direct in wording. But regarding to the story itself...
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw373_yes.png
1042363
Oh lord! That's funny right there! Ooh!! Someone do South Park ponies! It's brilliant!
I may not have read the scene with Octavia's first transformation well enough, but I have to wonder, how do claws come out of hooves? Arranged around the entire thing, evenly spaced, or arranged like they would be on a paw?
1042186 New Layout? Makes sense now, don't it?
... Nice
1042413 Maybe the I'd means "I had" ? I had thought I had lost myself that night? That ever occur to you?
1042100 You'd best give us another chapter fast.
THIRTY FOURTH!
Octavia you bitch.
Vinyl you blood sucker.
So help me, if this turns into a clopfic...
1042413
Funny, I had (mentally) expanded it as "I had thought I had lost myself that night."
I demand more
1042607 Octavia the Bitch and Vinyl the Parasite. Quite the duo going on there.
yay new chappy vinyl and octy best couple
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
As wunderbar as Weild the Shadow is, it reminded me of Tiesto's Adagio for Strings, then I thought of the real Adagio, listened to a few of those and wasted an hour an a half!
Honestly though, this explained a lot, this chapter did.
Verily forsooth
Even more Max Payne,
Ya think shes about to start yammering about "Banzai trees" or the "Genius of a Hole" here soon enough.
Bro Great story, I just can't get enough of it.
Octavia pulls herself together!
On another note, I wonder how The Silver Horseshoes treat recently-infected victims. Surely, Octavia can't be the first recent-infected they encountered...
I <3 this story! *squeal*
1042235
Silver Streak can't pass for black dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png
That music was perfect for sloppy twilight-lit makeup makeouts.
Yes, fantastic! Now all we need is the supernatural smexings and the Silver Horseshoes to be taken down, but not the way Vinyl does it.
1043102 I'm personally rooting for the Silver Horseshoes to win. DIE MONSTER DIE!!
And they could... if I became their leader, there's no way they could possibly lose. I know every weakness of every monster in all of mythology, plus mastery of strategy and SCIENCE!!!
Hmm, nah. I'll just keep working for Discord. It'll be enough fun once he's on the loose again.
1042607 I lawled.