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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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So she basically has TEDIORE weapons now
Gonna make one of the weapons walk and fire while talking before jumping onto a target and exploding? That'd be hilarious for yang to experience once ( How? Discord, Duh. ). Or at the very least, walk and fire then explode if they're the guns.
Tecnically speaking any non organic intelligent life is an A.I.
BORING!!!
I really like this storing, but what you do is boring. One rule of good writing is that heros never have luck. They accomplish things with effort. Had Yang had a near death fight with the dragon and than found the armor as reward, that would have been exciting. Or even just the blueprints, and she had to find some rare component/material to build it in another arc, would have given you some good world building chances.
Plus, the armor is to OP. The TDR should have a high anough magic cost to make it not abusable, after all you create matter out of energy, and recreating displacer-tech should be impossible. The price to use the guns as super-granades should be that she had to recollect the ammo bands or even risk to lose them depending on environment.
To prevent Yang to degenerate into a dime for a dozen Mary Sue you should thoroughly rethink the whole armor idea.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdbex7bVUHo
10169208 Those are good points. I will take them into consideration.
Okay. This was dope. But I feel like this was the Grimm dragon Ruby petrified in the show. So I feel like without the rainbooms this would have ended very different
When did she get swords???
Yangs armor needs more purple
10169437 They came with the armor. Look at the picture and you'll see them holstered on her upper legs.
poor ShamyRocky... Yang's taking away his pride that ain't liquid
NICE!!!!!
10169208
Next chapter:
Yang wakes up in a hospital bed after konking out for a week.
10174064 Considering where they are, that would be impressive.
Yang: *Wakes up* what happened?
Shamrock: Well, your guns exploded, then you fainted. We brought you back to camp immediately.
Yang: Then. . . Why does it look like an abandoned hospital?
Shamrock: We spent a day going through the ruins until we found a medical wing, as Mei called it.
Mei: Hi!
Shamrock: After that, we brought you down here.
Yang: So. . . I fainted, you brought me back to camp, you wasted a whole day in the ruins, then you brought me back down here.
Shamrock with pride: Yes.
Yang with verbal arrow: And you didn't think to pack up and go back to civilization with me because. . .?
Deflated Shamrock: I don't know.
10175189
I meant more along the lines of magic burnout, but that would actually be kind of funnny.....
Dis getting kool
Can't wait for the next chapter!
10271989 Yes you can.
10272238
You're right
second time reading this chapter and I just got the tediore reference