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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Soo, Rayne spends a lot of time to become insanely op, just to lose to a couple of tree branches? Well, there must be good explanation for this one, can't wait to hear what it is!
In the beginning it feels like Rayne leading a war especially since he has an army at his beck and call, nice use of the song it suit the scene of his pursuit for power.
The scene with Rayne and zecora is still adorable on how worry zecora is for Rayne, what Rayne plan for the dragon magic could be, there many possibilities but one is the answer.
Look like the forest gotten tired of Rayne wreaking it shit and decided to fight back, the everfree has send it champion to challenge our dark and handsome stallion, who was that disembodied masculine voice, could it a be somebody that possibly be Rayne yin in his yang? An idea worth thinking about.
I only have one question how can you lose to a bunch of trees little bit laughable anyway who does the green eyes belong does anybody want to take a wild guess.
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9810539
Well admittedly not quite the reaction that I was expecting from this chapter but I always welcome criticism because it helps me to become a better writer. So thank you.
Rayne had been caught off guard and severely wounded by the initial blow making him severely limited in his abilities from the injury. And I had made the assumption that being stabbed to death by giant, sharp, spears of wood explained it's own danger. A tree limb swiping down at you at 45mph (the average speed of a sword stroke) would break limbs or cut you in half depending on the branch. And yes he could destroy the branches but that wasn't the problem. Clearly a much deeper explaination of the scene will need to be made so I will include a flashback in the next chapter to clear things up.
9810404
Thank you for the compliment on the song Marytryne. I've been wanting to use that song for the longest time but could never think of a place for it. Then I thought of this scene and it was perfect!
9810616
True, guess it does prove that no matter how much power you gain, it doesn't matter when it comes to an ambush... reminds me of this one guy I knew, he was a black belt in some martial arts, and got knocked out in one hit from a sucker punch. Sorry I didn't think of that. hell I should know better, due to my prior service. That was a blunder on my part, I'm sorry.
9810628
Oh no worries. Nothing to apologize for. I didn't see it that way at first but in hindsight I did leave it kind of unanswered for why Rayne didn't rage and destroy everything. Yes he's stronger than trees... but he's not stronger than being stabbed to death.
9810616
I'm not saying the trip was I liked it very much dissing little bit unlikely to happen you know but I hope another trip permit doesn't comes out soon it was very entertaining
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Eh, You live? You learn... or die... I'd rather live and learn though lol!
Woohoo power stealing montage backed by a perfectly fitting song! All those beasts powers now under Rayne's metaphorical belt, fuck yeah! It's nice to see him putting his obsidian creatures to good use.
Oh shit... Zecora must be pissed if she didn't rhyme at him. Ooh I'm glad that stealing the dragons power went off without a hitch though. I was expecting some shit was going to go down after that warning at the beginning but I wasn't expecting an ambush! I wonder what's going through everyone's heads right now. Great chapter
Just caught back up on this story and already can't wait for more so great work
9816536
I am sorry to hear that the direction I've taken this story to doesn't meet what you were hoping for. Ten chapters and you haven't commented on anything else. If that is all that you are getting from it then sadly maybe my story is not be for you.
I enjoy writing romances in general. To me it has nothing to do with whether it is a popular ship or not. I have some mainstream ships and some of my own design in here. But if I am going to writing a fanfiction about anything, then I am going to include romances because that is just my style. I'll pick the characters that I would like to see together and write about how I think it would go.
I feel that your comments may have been better served as a private message to me rather than a public comment because you didn't actually critique anything in my story. Hopefully you are enjoying at least the rest of my story other than the shipping content and if not then thank you for giving my story a chance.
61-70 well it's surely at 9/10 however,
In chapter 65 I never knew Fluttershy can be a cheerful determination my mind may have exploded but it was good.
I never knew dash could flip her self It made me wonder a lot and thinking on that chapter 68 however, i think scoots is scootalo in the ending of that chapter.
In chapter 69 I felt like discord is pretty weird in this chapter not sure why though.
Ok so chapter 70.... my head is stuck on that song you posted in there xD.....
That's a pretty big plot contrivance considering he's been taking his friends powers left and right. What, I'm supposed to believe he suddenly draws the line at Spike?