All Devouring Black Hole Dark Archon

by Morphile

Learning the AU part two: Pinkie Pie

Author's Note:

thoughts
"Speech"
"telepathy"
loud/echoing

Not needing a prereader, and LOVING it

The bit about reading a story is not referring to a fanfic, it's referring to the show, as there is no TV in this version of Equestria. And just a heads up, if I lose interest in this story and don't post for several weeks, make a comment. I'll get the notification, remember it exists, and possibly write more of it. If you include an Idea about what to do next, it'll make me think and therefore make it more likely that I will write some more of this. If you write up a chapters worth in a comment, it might get made an Omake. Probably with edits to account for my ego in self insert form.

Well, Pinkie Pie may or may not be a forth wall breaker without knowing. What's a forth wall? It's a metaphor for the boundary between a fictional narrative and reality. Breaking it refers to doing something that either references the type of media the story is in, such as hopping between panels in a comic book, or directly refers to the audience. I'm actually not sure if we are living in a work of fiction, but I'm aware that we might be, and I know many thing about this world from a story I read that fits it closely. Huh. So you think I'm able to do stuff that the audience can see, but normal ponies can't? Yes, now, can you get out of my head? I'm headed over to were you should be living. Okie Dokie, Loki.

Well, with that out of the way, I'm almost at Sugercube Corner. The part Pinkie's room should be in looks like rock candy instead of a cupcake, so I'm going to guess that she stayed in touch with her family on the rock farm. Knowing a bit about minerals, I can make sense of a rock farm, as almost all stone is made of a mixed up mass of crystals. This means that if you can reshape those crystals, you can make geodes out of almost any kind of rock. Granted, the types of gem in them will usually be low value, but it's still gems.

Now entering the store, I immediately see a difference. There are almost no cupcakes on the display and far more muffins. And there is rock candy, mostly in the muffins. If what I think about the rock farm is true, Pinkie may have accidentally started mixing the rock farm stuff into making frosting, which led to rock candy. Simple ways of making frosting are just mixing water with sugar until you get creamy frosting, which, if mixed with something that rearranges crystals, could end up making large, solid sugar crystals. Add flavoring and/or coloring, and you have rock candy.

On the way to the stairs up, I see Derpy working in the kichen. I hope this is her only job, because needing several probably full time jobs does not bode well for a person's livelihood. And apparently she is actually named Derpy, with a sister named Ditzy. Enough of the casual mind reading, time to see what Pikie has.

As I get into Pinkie's room, I see that she is asleep. Either she was messing with my thoughts while asleep, which is worrying, or she falls asleep very fast. Quickly checking how much magic she has by draining it, she has a LOT more than average and it does not play well with the stuff I'm made of. Looking into her memories, I see that the Sonic Rainboom never happened, which raises some alarms. Pinkie's cutie mark is almost the same, but with the clear addition of oddly colored crystals that seem transparent holding the balloons in place. Hey, stop staring at my flank! Well, there's confirmation that she does it in her sleep. And I will be ignoring you unless you actually talk, instead of just putting thoughts in my head. Okay... I'll be quiet.

Looking further into her memories, my assumptions on the rock farm were correct. Her family knows how to manipulate the shape of stones so that the different minerals merge into proper gems. To make proper use of this, they actually moved to a place with stones that have a high ratio of valuable and useful minerals. She accidentally found out about using it in a solution when mixing frosting at home, and found the rock candy delicious. However, due to the ratio of sugar to flower at her family's home, she couldn't make cupcakes, instead making muffins with rock candy sprinkles. The family found them delicious and surprisingly not wastful, making muffins replace bread at dinner as the staple. Every one of them agreed that this was for the best.

Upon moving to Ponyville nearly two years ago, Pinkie was met by Derpy, who preferred cupcakes but could rarely afford the amount of sugar needed, so she usually got muffins instead. Pinkie had actually never heard of cupcakes before then, but offered to prepare some of her muffins for Derpy. After eating them, Derpy demanded to know how to make them, and Pinkie figured out how to make rock candy without magic in a day for the sole purpose of teaching Derpy how to. The unexpectedly delicious muffins are also what got her hired at Sugarcube Corner, as they were more popular and more profitable than cupcakes. Higher sales price, lower production cost, and no complaints of being too expensive or lower quality. 3 big things all businesses seek because they are amazing for profit.

Now knowing that Pinkie triggered a local culinary shift that almost put Bon Bon (or Sweetie Drops) out of business, I head back down, seeing that Derpy's cutie mark is the same. Quickly checking her memories for what it means, I find that it represents being good at cleaning, of all things. And yet she does more of the cooking then Pinkie... Oh, she actually is the one who does the dishes for the shop. And focuses on the breads because Pinkie isn't patient enough to make them. Looking at her subconscious, I find the reason for her iconic eyes is that her brain can't keep her left eye on track. Okay then, onwards, to the Fluttershy. I hope she didn't end up with nasty injuries or severe trauma. That would just be depressing.

Comments

[Azure5555]

One does not simply "silence" the Pie.

[Shattered_Moon]

if i find out flutters is hurt I WILL find a way to hurt whoever did so in the nads with a chainsaw.