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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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*Sigh* Another fighter pilot in equestria with Rainbow Dash fic!
I'll give it a go, but you better have something original hidden up your sleeve.
Flare is such a badass name.
Almost self-insert level badass.
3539998
Like a minigun?
3539998 there's a lot of rainbow dash/ fighter pilot fics here!?
I have only found one other story out of all the ones I read, and I found more stories with rainbow dating a human that was transported to equestria they were on foot...
how do these typical stories go, so I know not to do what they do...
3540031 lol, I can only get that badass when im playing battlefield 4, other than that, I wish I was doing a self insert, that way I would be able to safely say I was like flare! xD
Sadly, im only that badass in games...
3540031 One, This is very true. Very very true. And two, are you going to update your A-10 in Equestria fic anytime soon?
Author, you have my favorite for this fanfic, I look forward to fun times and crazy hijinks ahead.
I like it, good job
3540755 Oh... just a few
3544130 Dammit!
... I was hoping I would be able to do something new... now I see that I will probably only make a few of the same stories as others...
So... tell me, please... how can I avoid making a few of the same decisions as those authors did for their stories? Like, im sure they all have something in common (other than it being Rainbow Dash/Human romance)?
3544237 having way to much technology porn about the jet. No one really cares all that much about what the caliber of the guns are or how much fuel it eats per second. Also, jet fighters are not cars, in most of these fics they park the jet at any old place then just use it like a commuter train whenever they feel like it.
Also, after a few chapters the plane becomes very unloved, pushed to the side. Keep the plane as an integral part of the fic, i'm sure if an alien landed their spaceship on earth all our scientists would be gushing over it.
And lastly. Make the relationship believable. Please?
3544295 Well, it seems the majority of the problem wont be present... I tried to paint the image of what Flare did, but if that didn't get through to you (not trying to be rude about that, just the wording), then here it is;
He dumped his fuel from his jet, and Victor was trailing directly behind him, and when Flare applied the air breaks, it basically became a lump of metal with no thrust. Hence the explosion; the two jets crashed. That means both jets are trashed, destroyed, no more... the only thing to escape was his seat, which didn't deploy a parachute as he wasn't in it to activate it, and then there was the point that he passed out before he could tell why he didn't slam into the ground.
Romance... it is a delicate thing to write about... and while it will be tough, I will do my best to make it believable. I try not to write things where the two characters look at each other, love each other, and start making out. Flare is a human, RD is a pony, there is obvouis differences that I will need to clarify as the story goes on, and I only intend to make it where Flare has to impress RD (unintentionally of course) to earn her respect, then admiration, then move it towards a slight infatuation, progress it to deep infuataion, and then maybe where they actually start to get closer together. I might not have a set plan, but that never stopped me before. my only problem with Celestial Gift, is it seems that it will end sooner than I had anticipated... THAT one the romance moved way to quick, even for my taste...
pretty sure boy is just an insult, never a nickname
3544597 depends on the company around you. can be a nickname that is meant as a constant insult.
3544465 Wha... No but... F-22
Still, I like this and you should most certainly continue!
(also I have a feeling somewhere in the story you said the F-35 was older than the F-22, and on a more nitpicky point, that said F-35 needed an upgrade to be on par with the F-22, my OCD for correct tech specs will not let me miss those )
3545314 oops... meant F16 was older and needed the upgrades to be on par with F22...
Will fix it when I get on my computer
I'lll give this a go. Dunno why, but I will
3545314 AAANd... Fixed! Thanks for pointing that out. that was a small mistake, with a big difference for the reading material.
Not bad so far. The air brakes aren't used to keep a vehicle from moving during takeoff though. Beyond that, a fair bit of the afterburner use just didn't fit. Aircraft are not left armed, but for the sake of the story I can forget that. The 16 can't out turn the 22 though. It kills me because the 16 is a sexy beast, but it's true.
Overall, neutral vote. Will keep reading :)
"Plausable" setup for the story given the testbed programs I read about from a number of Airforce and Aerospace magazines I got from an Air Force pilot a few years ago. The F-16XL testbed project for one...
Another testbed series (Name not mentioned or i forgot) of the time detailed in the same articles had added advanced steering vanes on the underside and experimental vectored thrust nozzles for the engine, giving that version maneuerability that made its more conventional chaseplanes look like they were standing still, likely on a par with the F-22 today. The articles speculated these innovations for both types of testbed were to be an upgrade package for the fighters, and had even been entered in the Enhanced Tactical Fighter competition, only to be beat out by the F-15E.
All or most of the innovations such as supercruise and vectored thrust found their way into the YF-22, YF-23, and Eurofighter programs..
Given the embarrassing delays on the F-35 program and the openly declared intent of Russia and China to swarm the air in wartime with stealth fighters of their own, it doesn't take Stephen Hawking to start thinking about revisiting the testbed programs as a (relatively) cheap Service Life Extention Program since the US and it's allies already have hordes of F-16s. (perhaps as unmanned drone fighters?)
An Experimental F-16 with a comparitively cheap add-on nano-stealth coating, cutting edge ECM, vectored thrust, super-maneuverability vanes, and supercruse, making it front line competitive against Russian stealth would be a pretty prize for a traitor to sell to the highest bidder...
6787791
So?
The 20mm rounds would’ve tore his wing apart
11504474
One of my biggest regrets about writing a military based story is the fact I don't truly know much about military reality based facts. I'm a military weapon and vehicle fan, but I don't truly understand what weapons will do to other vehicles, much less aircraft combat, and what all the structure of the plane endures even when it's in flight, much less when it suffers actual damages while moving at such speeds.
Thank you for pointing thus out, but at this point, a rewrite would just about scrap the entire story...
I don't even know what I intended to do with it at this point. Hell, rereading the story so I can continue it gives me nothing but cringe at this point... but I enjoy the memories from writing it too much to outright delete it...
As much as one might think Equestria is getting their hooves on an F22 or F16, I can only think of how useless it'd be combat-wise against living targets. I doubt it could've even been used to fight aerial battles, given that the IR missiles would be essentially useless against living, breathing targets and the radar... Well, if the radar can be configured to detect fleshy flying creatures, perhaps the Semi-active radar-homing missiles could be of use. But other than that, with only a couple of seconds of cannon fire... Good luck trying to hit pegasi, griffins, or insert any other flying race that isn't a dragon.
Though, if the F16 is equipped with some air-to-ground stuff, that might be pretty useful... Oh well. A shame Victor didn't steal an F15, F15 > F16. Anyway, a couple of nitpicks...
Someone already mentioned their 20mm cannons absolutely ripping each other apart.
If the target is so close that your missile shrapnel has a possibility of hitting your own jet, you might as well open your cockpit and throw rocks at em'. Short-ranged IR missiles can hit targets a couple of kilometers away in rear aspect.
Also, even if caught by Celestia, going from terminal velocity to an instant stop in only a couple dozen feet is death. But it's magic, it gets a freebie.
There are some other points that I found off, but without much more info such as the aircraft's speed, weather conditions, armaments, etc. it gets a pass. Overall, pretty good for someone who isn't a complete nerd on military history/vehicles(SendHelpIHaven'tSeenGrassInYears) like me.
But as someone else said in the comments, don't over-detail on aircraft details like gun caliber, maneuvers, airbrake/flaps, and terminology unless that's the main point. Overall, pretty good on that part, can't nitpick what isn't there. Or can be interpreted as technically correct, the best kind of correct.
...
The buck did I just do? Did I seriously write several paragraphs on just the first chapter, nitpicks, and more? I need to go touch grass. Still, really nice to find a fic with military vehicles and aircraft, especially when combined with ponies.