zyr1987 9 12 150

Joined September 2012
51 followers

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D'awwww Fics

zyr1987's Stories (9)

Gimme Shelter
Fleur de lis is thrown out of her coltfriend's home and caught up in the rain, when a helpful stallion offfers her a bed for the night
1,110 words · 489 views · 63 likes · 2 dislikes
The Model Caretaker
Fleur de Lis moves to Ponyville, after finding Fancypants cheated on her, then got her shunned by the Canterlot elite, and slowly becomes infatuated with a certain yellow pegasus. However, she seems to have come down with hoof in mouth disease
25,843 words · 1,238 views · 95 likes · 11 dislikes
Rainbow Dash discovers "The Stare"
After RD pushes Fluttershy too far, their friendship is nearly ruined.
1,941 words · 782 views · 32 likes · 3 dislikes
Luna Looks for Love
Luna calls on the mane six to help her find her soulmate.
9,894 words · 378 views · 27 likes · 3 dislikes
The Storm
2,415 words · 650 views · 25 likes · 6 dislikes
Luna's Power and Rainbow's love
16,054 words · 664 views · 38 likes · 14 dislikes
The Story of "The Stare"
1,858 words · 264 views · 9 likes · 1 dislikes
Fifty foot Applejack
1,246 words · 625 views · 15 likes · 13 dislikes
Breaking through the ice
1,231 words · 203 views · 3 likes · 2 dislikes

zyr1987's Blog (12)

25 6

650

The Storm by zyr1987

Romance Sad

Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash are caught in a powerful storm near the Everfree Forest. They run to take cover in Fluttershy's cottage, but, during the trip, a large branch nearly kills Fluttershy. Rainbow Dash, despite being badly injured herself, takes it upon herself to get Fluttershy to safety and care for her until the storm passes.

First Published
7th Oct 2012

Last Modified
7th Oct 2012

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Comments ( 10 )

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Briianz

#1 · 32w, 3d ago ·

Image: http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lltzgnHi5F1qzib3wo1_400.jpg

Although, there are a few grammar mistakes, but yeah...

FlutterDash7

#2 · 32w, 3d ago ·

Nice simple story. But I would get rid of the authors comment you made in brackets early on in the fic. You could still fit the info in, just try and do it in a way that flows with the story.

:yay: :heart: :rainbowkiss: FTW!

zyr1987

#3 · 32w, 3d ago ·

Yeah, you're right about the brackets. I'll fix that up when I've had a bit more sleep. Writing a fanfic while half asleep does tend to have odd effects like that

A Fox in Equestria

#4 · 32w, 3d ago ·

First comment summarizes my feelings.

FALG

#5 · 32w, 3d ago ·

Pretty good! I feel it repetitive a few times but overall it is actually nice.

I only have to critisize just a little something: Fluttershy's opinion over Rainbow, did she change her thoughts of her friend so quickly? Because personally I think she does it out of pity.

But I could be wrong! It's just my opinion. (or it's maybe because I'm a little over FlutterDash shipping? Oh who cares?)

It was pretty nice, I say it again. I'll give you a few cheers for this!

zyr1987

#6 · 32w, 3d ago ·

>>13985421398542 It was more because she wanted to thank Rainbow Dash for taking care of her in some way, and when she was asked, she realized that giving a relationship with Dash a chance was a good way to thank her. I'll try to work that in, when I go back in and fix things up some more

FALG

#7 · 32w, 3d ago ·

>>13985821398582

That's good that's good, I was just telling you my point of view.

Wumz

#8 · 32w, 3d ago ·

Definite read later.

Description looks alright.

Relevant Heavy Metal

#9 · 32w, 3d ago ·

Tornado Of Souls - Megadeth

Youtube Video

Wolfmaster1337

#10 · 32w, 2d ago ·

After hearing a loud snapping sound, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy turned to see one of the giant tree branches flying towards them, but they couldn't do anything about it, as the branch was too close and they were both grounded. It slammed into Fluttershy's side and Rainbow's wing, knocking both ponies off their feet, and causing Rainbow to see stars for a second.

Feet?

Feet?!

FEET?!?!

Try 'hooves'

Image: http://i.imgur.com/j4Nnv.png

~Wolf

Long Vive, Lupus Imperii!

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