When Jackie arrived in Mexico, he was surprised as El Toro drove up almost immediately to collect him. "We must hurry, Jackie!" he greeted insistently. "It is almost nightfall. Soon the beast will attack again!"
Jackie promptly climbed into the van, Uncle following after him. "Swing by where the inscriptions are on the way," Jackie instructed. "We'll drop Uncle off to translate." He smiled to himself, glad Tohru had stayed behind to watch the children with strict instructions that they stay in San Francisco.
"Are you certain there will be time?" El Toro asked worriedly.
Smiling, Jackie placed the Ox Talisman against El Toro's forehead, where it affixed itself to his mask where it had sat for so long. "When I realized we'd be fighting a magic beast, I came prepared." He gestured to the choker he wore around his neck where the Rabbit Talisman was affixed, and to Balance Breaker strapped to his back.
"I thought it was not safe to have them loose in the world, and that was why you had to lock them up in a secret location?" El Toro asked, confused yet relieved.
"The Dark Hand has other interests at the moment," Jackie explained calmly. "One day with them out won't make much of a difference."
The chupacabra proved to be a fierce beast. Almost humanoid in shape, it held itself slung low to the ground for battle. Its body was covered with coarse, spiky brown fur and actual spikes, and each hand and foot ended in three crimson claws. Its eyes glowed red, and its battle cry was an unearthly shriek. It blurred forward almost too fast for the naked eye to follow, and it struck with the force of a speeding truck.
With the help of the Talismans, Jackie was fast enough to keep up with the beast, and El Toro was strong enough to match it. Jackie would race ahead of the beast and threaten with his sword to drive the creature towards El Toro, who attempted to get it in a submission hold so Jackie could deliver a killing blow. While the attempt worked flawlessly the first time, the chupacabra proved flexible enough to break the simple hold El Toro had taken, and too crafty to be readily herded into the trap a second time.
However, the two still proved too much for the creature, and eventually a backhand from El Toro sent the beast flying. It spun to try and land on all fours, only to end up impaled on Jackie's blade. It let out a cry of pain and rage as it lashed forward, trying to get at the one who had killed it. It only managed a single glancing cut of its claws to Jackie's neck - barely breaking the skin and only severing the choker - before the sun rose, dispelling the creature completely.
Jackie and El Toro both slumped back, panting for breath after the intense combat. Jackie reached up to rub the cut on his neck. There wasn't any blood, but it irritated nonetheless. He decided not to put the Rabbit Talisman choker back on until it healed. Perhaps open air would help it pass.
With the beast's defeat, the town that had been under attack celebrated. El Toro invited Jackie to participate, and he welcomed the relaxation. However, his good mood - and El Toro's - faded as Uncle approached, his face grim.
"I have translated the inscriptions!" Uncle proclaimed happily. "Chupacabra is a beast of night that eats goats. Sunlight kills it!"
"We noticed," El Toro observed sardonically.
"Ah, so it is slain. Good." Uncle rubbed his chin. "One more thing! Did it scratch anyone? The curse is passed through its claws, and anyone scratched will became the Chupacabra with the next setting of the sun!"
El Toro looked over himself. "I was not scratched..." he observed cautiously. "Jackie?"
Jackie's hand went to his neck, where the irritating minor scratch still hadn't healed.
Uncle immediately pulled Jackie's hand away...and saw that the cut glowed green. "Aiyah! Jackie, you have contracted Curse of Chupacabra!"
"Can you cure him?" El Toro asked hopefully as Jackie staggered back in disbelief.
"Of course!" Uncle insisted, tugging on the satchel on his back. "Have all ingredients for cure...except for Capsicum. Must go to top of Devil's Peak and talk to wise elder to acquire some."
Jackie sighed in relief. "Well, that shouldn't take me too long-OW!" He rubbed his forehead as Uncle pulled his hand back.
"No! No Talisman Magic!" Uncle insisted. "Wild Magic of Curse will feed on any magic used in its presence until it is cured, becoming more powerful."
"Then we will run," El Toro declared firmly. "Senor Uncle, I will carry anything you need to bring, so Jackie can conserve his strength for the struggle with the beast, should we not make it in time."
Jackie rubbed the back of his head, not sure he liked the fatalistic overtones of that decision.
Unfortunately, El Toro's prediction proved accurate. They hadn't even made it halfway up the mountain when the sun dipped beyond the horizon. As light faded, Jackie felt pain shoot through his body, and he clutched at his head as he struggled to hold onto his humanity. He could feel the shape of his hands and jaw changing, and he heard his shoes rip as the crimson claws tore their way out of the leather.
As he struggled against the change, two tiny Jackies appeared on his shoulders, sidestepping quickly to dodge the spikes that erupted from his shoulder blades. "This is stupid," Dark Jackie observed flatly.
"What are you talking about?" Light Jackie asked worriedly. "If we don't fight the beast-"
"I mean fighting the transformation!" Dark Jackie interrupted. "It's hitting us all at once. Do you really think we have the mental discipline to control every cell in our body against Wild Magic?"
Light Jackie frowned as he shifted around the dark fur sprouting all over Jackie's body. "You have a point, but what's the alternative?"
"Don't fight the transformation," Dark Jackie pointed out logically. "Let it happen, and save our strength for when the beast attacks our mind."
Light Jackie blinked in shock. "...I never thought of that," he allowed. "But how do we take our mind off the pain?"
Dark Jackie grinned lasciviously. "We think about how it felt when Viper was pressed against our back pushing us deeper into the yoga pose, and how she looked doing that standing split in those yoga pants-"
"She is our friend, not just a sex object!" Light Jackie interrupted insistently.
"And if it were any more obvious she was blatantly trying to seduce us, she'd have to invite us to shower with her while wearing only a towel!" Dark Jackie countered. "Let me put it to you this way: if we go back to San Fran and tell her we were able to maintain our humanity by thinking naughty thoughts about her, how do you think she'll feel?"
Light Jackie blinked a few times, rubbing his chin. "Umm...flattered?"
"Definitely," Dark Jackie confirmed. "I won't argue she's a good friend...but you can't argue that she is a very naughty girl."
"I suppose I can't," Light Jackie allowed.
With the focus decided, Jackie relaxed his entire body, letting his mind slip back to thoughts of that more pleasant time as Viper helped him to relax, gently pushing him through the stretches and forms until all stress had washed away...and he felt the tension of the transformation fall away as it completed, leaving him hunched over as he completed the change.
Dark and Light Jackie glanced at the back of Jackie's head, where Chupa-Jackie was digging its way in. "We shall devour them all," it growled out in a gravely voice. "Give me goats!"
Dark and Light Jackie immediately closed on the manifestation, proceeding to thrash it from both directions as a miniature dust cloud formed at the back of Jackie's head. Before long, the dust cloud faded, leaving Chupa-Jackie tied up with Light and Dark Jackie standing to either side of him.
"This is impossible!" Chupa-Jackie proclaimed angrily. "How can you resist me?"
Light Jackie jerked his thumb at his counterpart. "I've spent decades trying to keep him caged."
"And I've had decades to learn every trick to escape said confinement," Dark Jackie added.
"With us working together, you didn't have a chance," Light Jackie concluded.
Chupa-Jackie thrashed angrily. "This shall not stand!" he proclaimed. "You will not conquer me so easily! I am ancient! I am powerful! I hunger! I-"
Dark Jackie interrupted Chupa-Jackie with a kick to the head. "Talk too much," he finished for the interloper, taping over his mouth with duct tape.
"Where did you get that?" Light Jackie asked curiously.
"When you stopped keeping a lid on our libido, there was a great deal to spare," Dark Jackie pointed out with a wry grin.
Light Jackie facepalmed. "Bad day..."
Jackie opened his crimson eyes, the transformation complete. However, much to his surprise, his mind was still his own. Standing upright, he stretched, working out the kinks of his transformed state. Turning to El Toro - who had taken a defensive stance - he curled two claws and stuck the thumb claw pointing upward.
El Toro's jaw dropped. "Jackie? You...you retain your mind?"
Jackie nodded.
"How?" Uncle gasped in awe.
Jackie responded by giving his best tiger snarl.
"The balance you achieved through being split by the Tiger Talisman allowed you to retain command of your mind against the beast's interference?" When Jackie nodded confirmation, Uncle's eyes popped wide. "Aiyah..."
"But the transformation...how did you endure its pain?" El Toro asked curiously.
Jackie looked down, twiddling his claws, uncertain he wanted to try explaining that...even if he had any idea how to begin.
El Toro suddenly chuckled knowingly. "Senorita Viper is a very fine woman, no?" he teased, thumping Jackie firmly on the back. "Be certain to tell her that she aided in retaining your humanity when you return to her!"
Jackie wasn't sure how to feel about the discovery that the coarse fur of his cheeks failed to hide a blush.
Guess Viper pressing the issue onto Jackie helped out quite well.
If that internal debate had gone on any longer, I'd have said that Jackie's mind is split.
Chupa-Jackie was thoroughly embarrassed and its all on tape.
These bad days really gets Jackie's "Goat".
While way shorter then the canon episode, that was way funnier then canon.
...I approve of this change in events, if only because it shows Jackie having the wisdom to be pragmatic.
8034182 that would make a lot of sense
8037110
Nothing ever stops you from making puns, does it? lol
Very neat, though I feel I must ask if the fact that Light Jackie and Dark Jackie can manifest is going to be a problem. After all, there's a reason why splitting into your cores aspects is a very bad idea...
The Chupacabra is going to be like the curse of Lycanthropy in this world, isn't it.
Edit:
Called it.
I guess Jackie can at least be happy that he has such a supportive wing man
That was fun, may I have another? Looking forward to more.
Keep up the great work. Deus tecum.
I like the personal development that Jackie just got. Best shoulder angels.
8037110
You could say he's of three minds about the situation.
Or rather the tape's on IT.
So Jackie's boner fought off the curse.........That's pretty damn funny I'll give you that and I like that it is actually the Tiger Talisman that gave Jackie the ability to do so. I always thought it was weird that 11 tailsman's had abilities with some kind of use yet the Tiger seemed completely and utterly useless.
Yet here we see it gave Jackie real balance of his good and dark sides and it played out well here and without both sides constantly fighting each other Jackie is learning to not be such a stick in the mud, mellow out a little, and most importantly....ACTUALLY TRYING TO GET A GIRLFRIEND! Gotta love that.
8037426
Hey helps that they are pretty much his literal Yin and Yang sides.
Viper is a lucky lady.
Nothing is stronger than the power of the male libido.
8037243
He's been stopped before. Usually by very strong feels.
Will Jackie just admit it and start dating Viper! Seriously they would make awesome parents and Jackie seriously needs to get laid, off camera of corse.
8037223 I had fun ide.
If Tats go whit Bai Tsa and Velmont being the Dazzlings parents.
They could hire the CMC to baby/foalsit the little razckals. Ther is enough timy wimy stuff hapaning that they got sent back in time and across dimensions, thus ending up in Equestria do their thing get sent to EQG, having been raised in a human world orignaly they adapt quickly and when the second movie rolls around, the CMC over hears Twilight talking about tre sirens called the Dazzlings they tell her to ask how they reackt to an old nickname(or something) and then prosed to embarise them whit babypics and storys.
Ovcourse they call Bai Tsa and tell her wher they are and she is proud of them if a bit anoid that they underestimated Starsweril, after all any wizerd whit that great beard is bound to be powerfull.
And, just like in the episode, apparently none of them knew capsicum is in every chili pepper on the planet.
I remember how a similar balancing act lead to freaking Prometheus...needless to say do not underestimate the power of the yin and yang balance under any circumstance, it is a harmonic act after all.
And considering I talking to a group of people who follow a show which has harmony's raw power on full display I should be preaching to the choir here.
What TV show is mlp a crossover with in this story?!
8037589 Jackie Chan Adventures, a cartoon from some years back starring Jackie Chan, his "uncle" and his "niece"
8037618 Ok thanks
8037589 Jackie Chan Adventures!
I cannot wait to see what Viper does to Jackie when she hears how he kept control! And ZI also can't wait to see the girls (both human and ponies) react to Vipers no doubt enthusiastic reaction!!
The Power of Love, it's curious thing... Make one man weep, make another man sing...
8037659 makes this guy not go and try to eat goats
8037589 Jackie Chan Adventures
I am imagining Viper's smile (upon hearing Jackie's...gratitude) as partly genuine and partly seductive, smothered in an incredible amount of self-satisfaction.
"I hope you see how rewarding it is to have good memories floating around your head, Jackie. You never know when they can save your life. In fact, you really ought to make a few more, just to be prepared."
Chapter Ninety Eight
"Aiyah!"
\
\\
Chapter Count: 2
Total Count: 47
"One More Thing!"
\
Chapter Count: 1
Total Count: 80
ok. that is jest great. viper is so gonna love this when she gets wind.
8037110 how do you come up with so many of these... Are they all on the spot or do you take a while thinking them out?
8038315
milestone of "One more thing" 80 reached!
We're not even done yet, go Uncle go!
8038644 He's the other sans. Punning wordplay is a way of life for the Sans.
media.giphy.com/media/91t7c8D1HzQB2/giphy.gif
8038315 I am ashamed of Tats right now. Only 47 "Aiyah"s. Those are rookie numbers. You need to bump those numbers man.
8038644 On the spot like Tats since my focus is puns relating to the chapter as best I can.
The question now is if the cure to Jackie's condition is even needed at this point, due to him gaining control of himself in his altered state?
8039415
Sunlight's still lethal to him.
Hmmm, any chance Jackie can keep the Chupa mode for if he needs a boost and talismans are not in hand???? Plus, I want to see Viper's reaction to how he beat the mental assault.
8039660
You do remember the Curse of the Chupacabra makes sunlight lethal to the one thus cursed, right?
8039730 dang. I'm guessing Jackie would need SPF 9001 to survive in daylight then.
So I like how you came up with a reason why Jackie couldn't use the Rabbit talisman, but why couldn't Uncle or El Toro use it? They could have made it to Devils Peak and back before sundown. I've also noticed that Paco wasn't in this chapter even though he was in the episode and played a crucial part, of course that's no longer the case since Jackie was the one that got infected instead. I love that the mini Jackies are back which means we will see more of them. I'm wondering what if after Jackie is cured, there is still a bit of a Chupa-Jackie hanging around in his head. There are a few benefits to having a bit of beast within you if you know what I mean *wink wink* *nudge nudge*. Just think Young Frankenstein.
8040061
Uncle said no magic use in range of Jackie, because the Wild Magic would feed on it.
...I don't like Paco.
He's plenty 'beastly' without it, tyvm.
8039744
...
...
...can I have some? I sun-burn too easily and when I do, it is like I'm the blue sniper in the "meet the pyro" vid.
8040064
They could get out of range and then use the talisman. tyvm?
8040077
By the time they were out of range on foot, it'd be sundown.
Thank you very much.
If sunlight wasn't a problem, I bet the Chupa-Jackie form would've been a great Trump Card.
8040086
Also forgot, how did El Toro figure out that Chupa-Jackie was thinking of Viper to retain his mind?
8040730
Because he knows how to read body language, and even Paco realizes Viper's plans regarding Jackie at this point.
Chupad'awbra?