Three More Things!

by Tatsurou

Magic Morals

Uncle stared down at the three fillies, a frown on his face and his arms crossed. The three fillies hung their heads, knowing that there was a rather large harangue coming. They knew they'd done wrong, and were about to face the consequences.

Uncle glowered down at them. "Uncle is most upset with you three," he stated firmly. "Not only were you experimenting with magic unsupervised, you used up many of my magical ingredients that are difficult to come by, and did damage to the shop in the process. That is many bad things, and you must face stern consequences for them."

He sighed to himself. "After your punishment from summoning Pachamama and everything that involved, Uncle thought you understood magic was not a toy, but a powerful force not to be trifled with. Uncle was apparently mistaken, so before we do anything else, Uncle will explain to you the ethics of magical practice." As all three fillies groaned, Uncle shook a finger at them. "None of that! Only reason Uncle let you do magic things without this before was because Uncle was under the impression you were magical creatures with the proper instincts to control your magic and not break the planet. Even after fillies start talking, Uncle thought instincts for safety stronger than instincts for mischief. Uncle is not happy to be proven mistaken."

As the fillies groaned, Uncle settled in to lecture. "First, magic is not something that fixes everything. It is part of the world, and not a toy. Magic can work around some rules that bind mundane reality, but magic is still a part of reality. There is only so much magic in the world, just like there is only so much energy and matter. Energy and matter can be converted back and forth, and magic and mundane can also be converted back and forth. However, much like converting energy and matter, magic and mundane conversions are fraught with peril and consequences. Any number of bad things can happen with inappropriate uses of magic. One wrong move in crafting spell...boom!" He threw his arms into the air to indicate the seriousness thereof, causing the trio of fillies to jump back, startled.

Pleased to see he still had their attention, he continued. "You three have great deal of magical energy inside you...but it is used up for every spell you craft. Use too much too fast, and chi will be burnt up, and then..." He let his voice hang, trusting in childish imagination to paint that picture far more plainly than any words of his could. As he watched the growing looks of horror on their faces, he knew he had accomplished his goals. Sitting back, he continued his lecture. "As such, you three are not to work magic without Uncle present to observe, in order to make sure none of you face such dire consequences."

All three fillies nodded readily. Seeing that they understood, Uncle moved on to the next point. "Next, Uncle's rare magical ingredients. They are rare for a reason, and not to be used incautiously. What if something serious happened, and Uncle needed those to make medicine? But now they are all gone, and Uncle could not make medicine. Careless use of magical ingredients can cost lives, not just because of bad spell, but because ingredients not available when needed! Uncle not want to scare fillies like this, but fillies must understand why Uncle make these rules." He watched as all three nodded, their heads hanging low. Feeling he was pushing a bit too hard, he reached out to give each a comforting mane stroke, pleased to see this managed to cheer them up.

"Uncle is mostly certain he does not need to explain why damage to shop is bad thing," he continued. "Shop is home. If damaged too much, Uncle lose home. Fillies want be homeless, no?" At the vigorous headshakes the three fillies returned, he continued, "Then no damage shop!" All three nodded vigorously.

"Very well," Uncle confirmed. "Uncle has given lecture, and will now dispense punishments. If lessons are learned, fillies will be given more freedoms over time, but Uncle must be strict for fillies' own good." Uncle leaned back in his chair, watching to be sure he had their full attention. He then held up his hand with one finger. "First, fillies are no longer allowed in Chi Lab without supervision, and forbidden from experimentation even with, save during actual lessons. Understand?" The three fillies nodded eagerly.

Uncle smiled, ready to continue. "One more thing! Fillies not allowed to watch TV unsupervised. It gives dangerous ideas, and Uncle cannot allow that." While he noticed the hanging heads, he knew he had to stay firm. Besides, he figured a family TV time might help them stay close. It was rather surprising how readily he was coming to think of things like that. "One more thing! Fillies not allowed to watch Magic School Bus. While teaches good lessons, gives bad ideas for experimentation." He pointed to three shoddily constructed pony shaped suits, built of fish bowls, old hose, cardboard boxes, and paper towel rolls sans the paper towels. "While desire to know more about human body is good thing, protective suits not work. Not fit fillies well, and no air supply. And not good idea to attempt to explore Uncle's digestive tract without telling Uncle! Might have also ended up taking tour of San Francisco sewers!"

All three fillies tilted their heads, trying to make sense of that. As they realized what he meant, all their eyes went wide. "EWWW!" they all squealed out, making disgusted faces.

"One more thing!" Uncle insisted. "No more Reading Rainbow for you. Uncle will handle teaching reading and writing." The three fillies nodded, but Sweetie Belle at least looked excited. "One more thing! First lesson of magic ethics is learning responsibility, and cleaning up own lessons. Understand?" All three nodded agreement.

"Good!" Uncle confirmed. He then pointed out the window to the giant canine in the backyard. "Then put Clifford back in his book!"

Author's Note:

Prompt submitted by Bugsydor.

Comments

[MagusNeon]

Put Clifford back in his book?...Good god, what else will these fillies unleash?

[FurryBrony]

"Then put Clifford back in his book!"

Loved that punchline.

[Voltaje]

WoW, O.O, they reallly wanted to go trhough Uncle stomach? they saw that chapter ha, and may have puuled it off with magic XD, Uncle is lucky that didn't happened, anyway, good chapter .

[Grahf]

no Reading Rainbow you monster!

[CrackedInkWell]

7222422 Cthulhu?

[megabyte97]

Wow... This is the second time I've seen references to the big red dog on this site.

[MrAquino]

Man, Scootaloo must be sad without Reading Rainbow.

[Starcat5]

He then pointed out the window to the giant canine in the backyard.

Fun fact, the first time I heard Clifford referred to as the "Big Red Dog", I was confused, as the only books of his I had read at the time involved his early life as the runt of the litter. Seriously, what kind of growth hormones were IN that dog food?!?

[booklover41]

7222435 it would flee out of self preservation.

[Void Runner]

Chapter 11:
"Aiyah!"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 13

"One More Thing!"

"One more thing! Fillies not allowed to watch TV unsupervised. It gives dangerous ideas, and Uncle cannot allow that."

\

"One more thing! Fillies not allowed to watch Magic School Bus. While teaches good lessons, gives bad ideas for experimentation."

\\

"One more thing!" Uncle insisted. "No more Reading Rainbow for you. Uncle will handle teaching reading and writing."

\\\

"One more thing! First lesson of magic ethics is learning responsibility, and cleaning up own lessons. Understand?"

\\\\
Chapter Count: 4
Total Count: 28

[Fish0029]

I guess no Sesame Street then

[ArchAngelGundam]

Oh dear. Well, at least they learned their lesson, for now. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the great work. Deus tecum.

[Fire Flyer]

7222423 I know, right? It's just so out of left field, I love it!

[EchoWing]

7222450 No. Sesame Street is good for children, despite Elmo. But parental supervision still wise while watching TV.

[Tatsurou]

7222498
They found a spell in Uncle's library on how to bring a character from a story to life, and used some of Uncle's rare ingredients and a bit too much of their own energy to work the spell. How is that OP for this setting?

Edit: Also, considering Uncle canon summons creatures from other dimensions readily (the episode where Jade accidentally shrank Jackie and Hak Fu but thought she'd banished them), this could easily have been a similar spell, pulling Clifford from his dimension using the book as a medium. This is no more or less OP than anything Jade pulls in her unsupervised experimentation.

[badninja]

7222514

I still vote for Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. The only downside could be Make-Believe Land could be misconstrued by the poor fillies. Still he had a great message and I know few people who dislike the man.

[eighter]

7222498 fun fact chi magic is STRONGER then most other magic

[Cookie_Girl]

7222498 ....seriously? Guy, it's mlp, one of the most ridiculous cartoons that isn't immediately stupid. The characters have been sucked into a comic book, fought off bugs that could eat the words off the pages in a book, and Pinkie Pie. Also, the Cake twins.

This was not op, this was canon.

[Tatsurou]

7222565
Nope. They decided they wanted to try something they saw on TV, ransacked Uncle's library until they found the spell for it, and then did it. Same as when they summoned Pachamama, or tried to make enviro-suits to shrink themselves down to explore Uncle's digestive tract.

[Tatsurou]

7222605
Bill Nye talked about volcanoes. The fillies built the paper mache one he demonstrated, found it disappointing. So they looked around for how they could see a real one. Wound up summoning a local Earth spirit who could show them one. Pachamama was the closest self-sustaining one, and since she also reigned over motherhood, she felt like spoiling such adorable, inquisitive children...until Uncle told her off.

[SeventhBrony]

The part of Cliffard was just about the best part of this story so far, the best part was where a certain dragon sorcerer felt childish enthusiasm mixed with geology! I can't wait for the reading lessons! Equestrian agriculture, Sci-Fi and fantasy not to mention the reference section of the library will be SO sub-par except when it comes to the magic section, though considering Uncle we've really probably only seen the more used books while the others are in that bigger on the inside storage closet.

[MythrilMoth]

Nice list of noodle incidents.

[Leo Archon]

Dat last line. Wow. I never thought I'd hear a Clifford reference in an MLP fic. Well done for breaking the mold, Tats!

Something I'd like to know: why is it that the cartoon of Clifford has him able to talk and be understood by humans, when the books had him as a normal (albeit vastly over-sized) dog?

[Oroboros098]

That last line, it hit me like a train and it didn't see it coming.

[jwizard]

7222709

That last bit was likely artistic license. It was probably done that way because it sounded more cute.

[Nihatclodra]

They pulled Clifford out of his book...?

Nobody ever let them read H.P. Lovecraft books. EVER!

[MagusNeon]

7222435
...you do realise what you just said is on the same level of "This can't get any worse.", when trying to tempt Murphey right?

[RanmaChaos]

Another enjoyable chapter. Good job.

[Dirty Bit]

That last part, though

[buboniczarz]

HA HA HA HA HA HA THEY GOT CLIFFORD OUT OF THE BOOK?!?!?!?! HA HA H HA HA IM DIEING HERE!!!!

[Chrome Masquerade]

7222776 yeah. it's about as likely to end well as saying
farm3.staticflickr.com/2549/3946133196_785f8a0f12.jpg

[jsk244]

"Good!" Uncle confirmed. He then pointed out the window to the giant canine in the backyard. "Then put Clifford back in his book!"

I howled with laughter. My poor cat freaked out!

[the other sans]

At least Uncle is letting them digest this information properly and making sure they're on the right tract. Uncle is also making sure that they're gonna be suited to using magic properly. He also made sure to explain the importance of his... three more lectures. I'd have gone with toilet humour here too but I guess that's down the drain. Thankfully the CMC weren't too down in the dumps.

[recentteen14]

7222435 I think Chrysalis has a monopoly on him, sadly.

[D48]

7222455 ...And now they forgot it.

[Snowkitsune]

7222551 I like how you added The Pink One

[Greatazuredragon]

Uncle was under the impression you were magical creatures with the proper instincts to control your magic and not break the planet.

Cutie Mark Crusaders Planet Breakers, YAY!

[Jake Witt]

Children books are evil.

"Good!" Uncle confirmed. He then pointed out the window to the giant canine in the backyard. "Then put Clifford back in his book!"

Gonna crush 'em all!

[Raistlin]

7222898

Fuck Twilight Time. The CMC needs more Uncle Time.

[the one guy on the left]

7222768 Or stephen king, or R. L. stine, or m. night shamalon, or j. k. rowling...

[The Bricklayer]

That ending... How the hell did that happen?

[Jonakhensu]

7223459
Or Amelia Bedelia...

[Serefin]

7223459 Eh, Stine and Rowling are debatable here, but for sure they must never be allowed near the other two.

[Calliope Pony]

7223551 No, I agree about Rowling. We certainly don't want them summoning Aragog, do we?

[Serefin]

7223606 Knowing the CMC, they would have him wrapped around their fingers hooves within hours.

[AdmiralTigerclaw]

Something to consider with the CMC's success record: They successfully summoned Clifford. And that Earth Spirit.

[Seirs]

Good!" Uncle confirmed. He then pointed out the window to the giant canine in the backyard. "Then put Clifford back in his book!"

It was really hard not to break out in loud laughter while sitting in the waiting room at the doctor's office when I got to that ending.

Great chapter as usual. You write him so well I really hear Uncle's voice perfectly a lot esp when the mood changes like with that last line.

[ShogunWriter106]

So what's next?

[Kenshinryuu]

I want to see Clifford meet Fluttershy when the Crusaders return to Equestria. She'd love him.

I can't wait to see Uncle's reaction to the antics Jade and the Crusaders get up to once she arrives.

[djthomp]

"One more thing!" Uncle insisted. "No more Reading Rainbow for you. Uncle will handle teaching reading and writing."

Aww.