Once the sleigh was off, the rest of the group prepared to follow the locator spell to wherever Daolong Wong had secreted Santa's cottage. Jade had wanted to go on 'the ultimate joyride' of riding in Santa's sleigh, but two things prevented that. First, while the sleigh was large to carry the sack of toys, Tohru and his 'helpers' filled the rest of it up rather tightly, even with Lucia sitting in Tohru's lap to give her sisters more room. Second, Sweetie Belle had insisted Jade and Hsi would accompany the rest to confront the dark wizard.
"Attempting to steal Santa's chi is a desperate gamble," Sweetie had explained, "and with everything else he's done, we can only assume he is desperate in this regard, meaning he'll have brought everything he has at his disposal. This is an all or nothing roll of the dice for him, and he'll unleash everything he has against us so long as there's even a chance of success. That means we need to bring everything we can to bear against him to match."
The conclusion had been accepted all around, even if Jackie wasn't the only adult present who was uncertain about the idea of bringing the children along for such a fight. However, there wasn't anymore time for debate as the spell completed and Santa's exact location was deduced. Elvin immediately warped the group to the isolated spot in the Himalayas, where they found themselves landing on a transparent purple dome. "Dark Chi Barrier," Uncle observed thoughtfully.
"Clever," Hsi Wu observed as he examined it. "It's creating a pocket space cut off from the rest of reality, locked in time-space. As long as the barrier remains with Santa inside, his chi won't start to catalyze. If it catalyzed, he could smack Daolong Wong around without half-trying no matter what the old fool brought. We need to get inside and keep Daolong Wong from successfully stealing Santa's chi long enough for the barrier to break."
"And how are we supposed to get inside while we wait for the barrier to be broken?" Jackie asked, panting as he shouldered Balance Breaker. "I tried breaking it with my sword, but it just bounced off!"
"Recirculating magic," Uncle observed. "A good counter for a static weapon. It will take time, focus, and energy to breach the barrier...and in the meantime we will need power and skill to hold off Daolong Wong."
"Then leave the barrier breaking spell with the girls and I!" Jade spoke up quickly. "If it's a Dark Magic barrier, Hsi should be able to figure out a way to pull the rest of you inside, right?"
"Already have, if that's the plan," Hsi offered quickly. He glanced towards Uncle and the others.
"Solves all the problems and keeps the girls out of danger?" Jackie asked in surprise. "I'm almost afraid to ask what the catch is."
"If the girls can't break the barrier, the rest of you will be trapped inside forever unless Daolong Wong is slain," Hsi explained flatly. "And he can leave whenever he wants."
"...that's quite a catch," Viper murmured thoughtfully. "But a risk I can accept."
"Here is the spell," Uncle said softly, handing a scroll to Jade. "Take us through, Hsi."
Nodding, Hsi folded his arms with his hands extended forward and flexed his whole body. He slowly expanded as his human form faded out, leaving behind his demon form from the other timeline, standing taller than everyone present with a body fully fleshed out with muscle. "Let's do this," he growled, his voice gravelly and echoing as he flexed each muscle as he adjusted to the cold air.
Uncle, El Toro, and Jackie stared in shock. The three fillies turned wide smirks Jade's way as her cheeks colored from memory. Viper whistled appreciatively. "Damn, girl!" she said to Jade in amazement. "You got lucky!"
"Viper!" Jackie yelled out, aghast and somewhat offended.
"What?" Viper countered playfully. "Just because I'm window shopping doesn't mean I'm ready to turn in my loyalty card. And you have to admit, he's hot!"
"That he is," a hissing voice whispered from Jade's shoulder.
Turning, Jade saw a tiny version of herself resembling how she'd looked in the other timeline as 'Queen of the Shadowkahn'. Thankfully, the wardrobe was more modest as it was still her at her current age rather than an adult, but it was still unnerving. "Uh..."
"Really!" a prim voice declared from her other shoulder, coming from a tiny Jade wearing a pure white monk's robe, arms folded with hands hidden in the sleeves. "Aren't we a little young to be thinking such things?"
"We remember what it's like to have adolescent eyes," Queen Jade countered. "And besides, did you see those abs? You could grind meat on them! And that butt!"
Jade blushed brightly as she turned away. "Sweetie, please tell me I'm not crazy?" she asked as she gestured to her shoulders.
"If you mean your shoulder angel/devil equivalents, no I can't see them," Sweetie Belle offered readily. "But they are a documented phenomenon, though they can only be seen by the one whose 'consciences' they are and by those of other people."
"...so talking to yourself is no longer considered a sign of insanity?" Jade asked in surprise.
"As long as it's to a 'hallucination' of your conscience, nope," Sweetie confirmed.
"Familiars can see them too, though," Hsi Wu spoke up awkwardly, rubbing the back of his head nervously.
"Oh can they now?" Queen Jade purred eagerly, tugging suggestively on her dark gown.
"Going through the barrier now!" Hsi Wu called out in terror as he grabbed the others and dove through.
On Jackie's shoulders, Tiger turned to Kitten. "Okay, maybe we do need to keep a closer eye on Jade and Hsi Wu if that's how her 'dark' side thinks."
"Thinks? What about how she dresses?" Kitten countered. "And acts? It looked like she was about to start s- ...s- ..."
"Stripping?" Tiger supplied. "Yes, I noticed. You can say it, you know."
"Not about my niece!" Kitten called out desperately. "Where did she even learn to act like that?"
"You have to ask?" Tiger countered, pointing at Viper.
"I'm suddenly very glad I couldn't see Jade's consciences," Jackie murmured thoughtfully.
That was great! Both Jackie and Jade’s consciences’s should keep showing up! Hopefully this means that Daolong Wong season will be skipped over and we can go to what ever happened next, which was the demon chi arc.
Is this how the gang didn't notice the gun blasting and OLD MAN's yelling from inside the cottage?
I have a feeling Jackie was more surprise in the latter part in his statement.
Again, to quote Church/Alpha from Red Vs Blue.......... WHAT THE FUCK!?
Seriously? JADE has those now?
That's...................good? I think?
Oh this is going to be HELL for Hsi and his human form's puberty stages.
Okay, Tiger has a point there. This goes to show how Viper is a mixed blessing as a role model for Jade.
Dude, you're lucky. Us "outside observers" get glimpses as well as Hsi. Honestly, it's kinda funny, but scary to think about right now. And considering how sexuality (And if anyone throws a hissy fit for me just SAYING this one word, bite me.) in human females CAN start as early as EIGHT YEARS OLD while males tend to have theirs start in their early to mid TEENS (This is something I learned back in Sex Ed in FUCKING HIGHSCHOOL!).........God Hsi is SO going to be going through a LOT of awkward moments. Here's hoping that Hsi lucks out and Jade hits puberty in her mid teens.
A- Ghi- Jebe-
Damn it Tats! STOP MAKING ME WANT TO PETITION TO HAVE THIS MADE INTO A REAL THING!!!!
Also, more shoulder angel/devil stuff please, for like....everyone. A chapter, chapters, a multi chapter spin off story!
So, what, Apple Bloom's shoulder devil would be Audrey III?
Bad day...
Also, one thing I absolutely cannot let pass without comment:
This is perfectly valid word usage and all? But it isn't *wise* word usage.
A series two episode of Doctor Who did this same thing, only the actor put the stress on the wrong syllable...which completely changed the word he actually said, and thereby the meaning of the entire sentence. With rather...gross implications. Ever since then, I have been more acutely aware of how "secreted" should NEVER be used this way. It isn't grammatically incorrect, but it can be misread as something very cringe inducing.
Food for thought.
Will the new Jackie chan movie be used?
8482934
If you, specifically, can suggest a good word to use in its place, I'd be happy to replace it.
8482932
And I'm guessing her shoulder Angel would be Applejack.
8482944
Hmmm, perhaps 'ensconced'?
smirks
8482944
Tucked, stashed, hidden, spirited, secluded, squirrelled, stowed, buried, concealed, secured.
Some working with the 'away' part, some of them stand-alone.
I got half off the top of my head, the rest I grabbed by slapping 'secreted' into thesaurus.com.
Don't be afraid to use your tools.
8482961 Perhaps.
Seems Jade has to shoulder something from the alternate reality after all.
Guess Hsi and Jade is gonna have to be conscience of what they're thinking of.
Now we're just waiting for the bubble to burst. one of the first times everyone wants it to.
8481168
I would love if Daolong's eventual punishment is to become Santa Henderson's "helper" aka unpaid intern aka punching bag for eternity...
...compared to that, being Uncle's butler wouldn't be half as bad.
8482944
8482994
There, someone beat me to every single alternate that couldn't be misread as he sweated, oozed, dripped, or peed Santa's cottage.
Whoa, quite a catch indeed. Obviously they'll succeed, but noting all potential outcomes is always wise.
And damn, we now have glimpses from the alternate reality making their way back into the story? I heartily approve! I feel like the shoulder consciences should be something that everyone has happen at some point or another, but it would probably take away from its comedic value if it's overused. The fact that Jade's are just SO different is hilarious. Jackie's at least look the same. And Hsi Wu's ability to interact with them will make for some amazing moments if their appearance becomes a bit more frequent. The fact that Jade would probably be adding to one of my counters by yelling at 'herself' would also be a bit of a knee-slapper. Speaking of which...
8482934
Since it's not story text, I can't count that one, though I kinda wish I could.
8482932
8482961
I would love to just see a really freshly trimmed and proper-speaking Audrey III as her shoulder 'angel.'
Chapter One Hundred Fifty-Four
"Bad Day"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 40
"He's Not My Boyfriend!"/"I'm not his Mistress!"
Chapter Count: 0/0
Total Count: 45/3
8481168
So, shoot his arms off.
… Sweetie Belle, that's not how poker works. Daolong Wong has been dealt a very bad hand and doesn't have enough poker chips to play another round. The Chan Clan, on the other hand, has been dealt a very good hand and currently has most of the poker chips on the table (after causing at least two different players to drop out of the game). What you're doing right now is calling Wong's all in bid, where if he wins he will continue to be in the game for at least a couple more rounds. If the Chan Clan were going all in, Daolong Wong wouldn't stand a chance.
I have a gut feeling Old Man Henderson is already smacking Daolong Wong around without half-trying. That shotgun isn't just for show. In fact, it really good at keeping time to a certain Queen Song.
I don't know why, but for some reason Santa strikes me as the type of person who would be singing when he's kicking ass.
So, Hsi Wu kept his magical form from the other timeline. I wonder what else was retained when the timeline was restored. Oh I hope SSJ Jackie Chan.
Now I really want to see what happens when Jade gets split by the Tiger Talisman. Would we literally A Saint and The Queen of the Shadowkahn? Oh I certainly hope so.
You are the niece of Jackie Chan and are constantly trying to mimic his actions. You have a demon sorcerer familiar who you know will be wooing you the second you turn 18 years old. And in a world full of magic, you did not believe Santa Claus is real.
The crazy train left your station a long time ago.
I wonder how Jackie will react to that particular bit of information.
Okay, this was hilarious. I get the feeling Jade's Devil is going to mercilessly tease Hsi at every chance she can take.
Tiger has a valid point. Also, it would be wonderful if Jade's consciences and Jackie's consciences started arguing between the four of them while Jade and Jackie try to go about their normal routines. Like Jade and Jackie are having breakfast, trying to act completely normal while only hearing half an argument between the consciences.
Which works for right up until one of the four says something the other side takes offense too, which causes Jackie and Jade to start arguing at the table right along side their consciences.
And for some reason I get the feeling this becomes their standard Tuesday morning ritual.
Like this! Oh I can just see loads of comedy gold from a situation like this!
....how did he retain his other timeline body? It literally shouldn't exist.
Bad day averted, at least in regards to this specific detail of it.
Hah! Hsi is not a smart demon. Let the reasing begin!
8483075
sans arn't you suppose to be watching for humans.
8483186
Hey, between Jackie & Jade they've got 4 viewpoints. That's enough for a card game -or a tag team wrestling match (But would it be Good vs Evil or J vs J? & Who would referee? Hsi?)
8483194
he is a avatar of storms in demon, he can be a 80 foot long, 5 foot high cat if he wanted to.
Is the talisman animal hunting arc gonna occur or did something screw it up?
Meep.
8483379
8483194
Well, for starters, Hsi is a shape shifting demon that can change his form from demon to human and back again faster than most people can change their wardrobe. I'm pretty sure adding some muscle mass wouldn't be that much of a stretch.
More importantly, tats established earlier that Hsi's form is heavily based on preference and taste: his earlier form based on a combination of respect for gargoyles and his love of mischief. Add his memories being protected from time shift changes by his familiar's link for Jade and he has a frame of reference for the form.
Put simply: Shape shifting x (respect for gargoyles + Jade crush + fond alternate timeline memories) = Buff-golye
I don't know if I got to say this before, but clever use of the altered timeline to make it so Jade was Queen of the Shadow Khan. That'll leave room for the Oni Arc. Also, I love how you had her two sides come out, though I'm curious. Does that mean we might be seeing a certain group of priests who have been waiting for a reincarnation of a revered chi master to reappear anytime soon? I assume Jade's shoulder angel is the incarnation of this aspect of her past life, if the show's implication at the end of that episode is to be believed.
And yes, I'm loving the shoulder angel and devil gag. It's hilarious. That being said, I'm curious about how it's possible that Hsi Wu now has what essentially is a true Gargoyle form. I know he had it in the altered timeline, but I'm surprised he would still have it here. Was that because of the fact he remembered the altered timeline and wanted to keep the shape, or could he have taken that shape any time before, and decided not to to avoid causing Jade awkwardness? I'd love a little clarification on that, if possible. Thanks, Tats! And keep up the amazing work. Seriously, your writing is astounding. I'd gladly be a patron, if I weren't still working on getting myself set up in life.
8483528
That works.
8483526 This. It must be done.
8483526
can we please see this down the line for them????
Chapter One Hundred Fifty Four
"Aiyah!"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 47
"One More Thing!"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 83
Not your fault and not blaming you Tats, but I'm a bit sick of Christmas at the moment and somewhat hoping this arc wraps up soon. We started putting together our Christmas merchandise set where I work on Monday and I'm already fantasizing about setting the whole thing on fire...
8483836
I only plan two to three Christmas specific chapters after this. So it'll be done for certain by the end of next week.
8483836
I know the feels my friend. Hold fast, we'll get through this together...
Another great chapter. Well done.
Please let the next title be "Santa Clause will take you to hell"
Also, this angel/devil running gag is gold.
Not that great until the very end, now THAT was some Grade A teasing!! >=)
It'd be nice to actually chat with physical manifestations of your conscience. It'd put things into perspective.
8483526
I came back on a whim and found all the talk of the shoulder consciences. Quite hilarious, but this interchange made me think of something else... What if Uncle's shoulder consciences manifested also? Considering how balanced he is as a chi wizard, would he even have shoulder consciences? Maybe just one that would pop onto his shoulder to help him bounce ideas off of, running from shoulder to shoulder to cover both sides? If he does have two consciences, because of his internal balance, would they basically just be two copies of Uncle that are practically indistinguishable because they're both balanced, and the only reason he has two is to maintain that general sense of balance? Perhaps the only distinguishing factor is that yin Uncle prompts hugs ("Come, give Uncle a hug.") while yang Uncle is the one to say "Aiyah!" Otherwise the two of them could switch shoulders and we'd be none the wiser...
So many questions about shoulder consciences for a chi wizard. We need answers!
8484832
Good Uncle would believe in positive reinforcement (hugs). He primarily manifests with the fillies.
Bad Uncle would believe in negative reinforcement (temple strike). He primarily manifests with Jackie and Tohru.
8484837
Wow, talk about a quick answer! Does that mean both Shoulder Uncles already have planned screen time?
Also curious about your wording: when you say manifest with, do you mean those characters would manifest alongside the Shoulder Uncle on Uncle's shoulder, or that they would manifest on those characters' shoulders instead of his own?
8484851
More which one Uncle listens to for who.
Are they rescuing Santa from Daolong Wong or Daolong Wong from Santa 'Old Man Hendersen' Clause and his shotgun????
also, I can totally see Viper's shoulder Devil and Angel both being in sexy outfits to tease Kitten and Tiger but both also being ready to grab Demon Jade and teach her to go Classy Sexy instead of trampy.
8483186If Jade does get split... I'm guessing both versions jump Hsi. Well, Angel more to keep Devil from going to far. But I can see a blushing Hsi trying to squirm away as both sides snuggle to him.
8483526 I can see this happening. We just need to see Uncle, Viper, and Tohru's shoulder representations.
8484898
Ahhhh, got it. So basically everyone else is off the hook when it comes to the Shoulder Uncles (I kid, I kid—I can only imagine the arguments when it comes to the Shoulder Uncles giving their input on how to deal with Jade and her consciences ).
(spoilered for sake of likely new reader below)
8485181
No, you're thinking of Inside Ralphie when they went into Ralphie's bloodstream and nearly got eaten by his white blood cells. Arnold was the volunteer in For Lunch that stayed behind and unknowingly became the actual field trip ("One field trip for them, one bag of Cheesy Weezies for me."). Ahhh, my childhood. How the hell do I remember these details?
Oh, no. There are more of them! I really enjoyed that part, though. It's fun to see that they kept their memories of that event, since some good things probably resulted from it (like the Ancient Traps to catch the Old Ones -- I certainly hope those made it).