Conquest is Shiny
It wasn't easy to see for those not familiar with her habits, but Princess Celestia was worried as she sat upon her throne in Canterlot. Recent events had given her ample reason to worry.
Just over a week ago, she had been having tea with Fluttershy and Discord, hearing about Discord's progress in learning about Friendship. Suddenly without warning, Discord had started wriggling, much like he did when he sensed a magical imbalance. However, it went on and on until he eventually exploded. After reassembling himself, he'd said, "Not touching that. Vacation time!" seized Fluttershy, and vanished into his chaos dimension, metaphorically locking the door behind him. Celestia hadn't been able to contact him to get any more of an explanation than that.
Not long after that, she received reports of unusual Changeling activity. Changelings had been seen marching down every road in Equestria towards the border to the Badlands, not even bothering to disguise themselves. When confronted by ordinary ponies, they would smile and wave. When confronted by guards, they would laugh wickedly...and if pressed, would cite Equestria's own laws twisted all out of sense in a way that compelled the guards to let them pass. It was hardly the Guard's fault that nopony below a Lieutenant was expected to have the Laws of Equestria memorized.
And then there was last night. Celestia had expected to talk with Luna before she raised the moon, the way they usually did. However, there was no sign of Luna anywhere in the palace. Celestia would have been more worried - to the point of abject panic - if not for two things. First, the moon raised in a timely manner without her interference. Second, Luna's personal schedule showed no royal appointments that night. It wasn't uncommon for Luna to vacate the palace to enjoy herself on nights where she had nothing scheduled, although usually she at least would meet for a meal and let Celestia know where she was going.
After talking with some of her Guard, Celestia came to the conclusion that perhaps Luna had vacated in secret for a clandestine meeting with somepony special. It had been a while for the Lunar Princess, so it wasn't beyond the realm of possibility. As such, Celestia had been well prepared to be a good sister and catch Luna sneaking back in to torment her mercilessly about her clandestine meeting and press for details.
And then the moon had lowered, and there was still no sign of Luna.
That was where Celestia was now, worried about everything going on in the world and her own sister as she desperately tried to distract herself with paperwork. Which was why she greeted the Guardspony who came bursting through the doors of the throne room with far less than her usual amicability and enthusiasm. Great, she thought to herself. Bad news.
"Your Highness!" the Guard shouted out. "The Changelings are invading!"
"What?" Celestia demanded, shooting to her hooves. "How far have they gotten? How many of our citizens have they taken? Why haven't they been stopped?"
The Guard swallowed. "They're marching up the streets of Canterlot to the Palace. We've erected shield spells to try and stop them, but they just pull out markers, draw doors on the shields, and open them to continue their march!"
...wat? Celestia though to herself in disbelief. That sounded like something Pinkie would do...or possibly Discord.
"And...they haven't hurt or killed anypony yet," the Guard continued. "They've focused their magic into a massive plow they push in front of them, forcing civilian and Guardspony alike to the side as they march. They seem determined to reach the Palace at full strength." The Guard shivered. "Also, the vanguard of the Changelings is...different."
Celestia sat down. "Different how?" she asked.
"Well...there are about 100 Changelings that are...bigger than you are, Your Highness. Their chitin is armor plated, and they seem far more disciplined than the rest of the horde." The Guard swallowed. "Also with them is a bipedal creature in red and black, another in dark green, and...a horse walking on two legs."
"What?" Celestia blurted out, that last bit more than her mind could handle.
"They're here!" another Guard shouted out.
As the shout faded, the doors burst open again. The described vanguard marched in, the woman in green in the lead. Celestia recognized humans when she saw them, even as strange as these were. However, she also recognized the magical aura of the one in front. "You!" she gasped out, lunging to her hooves.
"Get off my throne," Chrysalis barked out.
Celestia bridled at her tone. "You dare-"
"We haven't killed anypony...yet," Chrysalis pointed out.
Suddenly, the entire gathered swarm flared their magic, making Celestia shiver. The combined power of the swarm just now dwarfed anything she'd be able to bring to bear...and with Discord in his Chaos Dimension with Fluttershy, he and Rainbow Power were unavailable. And Luna also was unavailable to assist.
Simply put, Celestia recognized that she was so severely outclassed in raw magical power that any defense she could raise could be crushed instantly.
"Do you want that to change?" Chrysalis asked, referring to her earlier statement.
Shivering, Celestia climbed off the throne.
Smirking, Chrysalis stalked past her and forced Celestia onto her belly. Sitting on the throne, Chrysalis then rested her feet on Celestia's back, turning her into a glorified footrest. "My kingdom now," she stated bluntly. "Someone bring me something sweet to eat!"
"Your maid is a-comin', Honeybunch," the bipedal stallion stated, his metal parts shining in the light of the throne room. A young Changeling - barely more than a toddler - leapt from his shoulder to grip Celestia's mane, chewing on it as the child struggled to climb.
"Your sweets, Your Majesty." That familiar voice pulled Celestia out of her focus on the Changeling eating her hair. Turning, her jaw dropped at what she saw. Luna! she demanded telepathically. What are you doing?
Serving Queen Chrysalis a treat while wearing a rather embarrassing maid outfit, Luna replied in the same manner.
Celestia's mouth worked as she struggled to make sense of Luna's calm reply. ...why?
Because the human in red and black has the power to manipulate narrative causality in the world he's a part of, and Chrysalis has fed enough off of him to possess the same power, meaning there's nothing you or I can do to combat them.
Celestia's face twisted slightly, as though she'd bitten into something distasteful but didn't want to give offense by saying so. So...just give in?
More or less, Luna explained. Neither of them have much of an attention span. Just make conquest boring, and they'll chase after some other shiny thing within a week.
And if that doesn't work?
I've already implemented a plan I have neither thought about nor discussed anywhere so they have no way of perceiving it before it is implemented.
"Oh, she's good," the red and black human commented to the cyborg stallion, who looked totally confused by the statement.
"Not as good as these cupcakes!" Chrysalis moaned, licking the crumbs of the confection from her lips and cheeks. "I want to meet the baker who made these."
"Of course, Your Majesty," Luna replied. "She wants to meet you as well." She then threw herself to the floor.
A flaming sword on the end of a long chain flew over Luna's head, embedding itself in Chrysalis' torso right between her breasts.
"Chrysi!" the red and black human called out. "NOOOOOOOOOO-"
Blinking, Chrysalis looked down at the blade protruding from her chest and slowly pulled it out, staring at the blade as the wound sealed itself up.
"-OOOoh yeah, I forgot you had my healing factor for a minute there," the human finished.
The chain jerked, tugging the blade from Chrysalis' hands and sending it flying back through the throne room...to a pink pony with three other such blades equipped, the chains wrapped around her four legs.
"Pinkie Pie?" the human demanded. "Wait...but that's that Pinkie Pie! How's she here? The Author said no same universes except in certain specific cases, and this wasn't one of them!"
...Author? Celestia thought in confusion.
"It's why I allowed myself to be captured once I sensed you had arrived, Deadpool," Luna explained. "I knew that if you had affected Chrysalis, we'd be powerless against her. Getting captured let me get close enough to you to use my magic to manipulate your ability to break into other dimensions conditionally in order to bring somepony who could match Chrysalis as she was now." She jerked her head at the Spartan Pinkie. "She is who arrived."
"You can do that?' Deadpool asked. "Wait, I can do that? How powerful are you? How powerful am I?" He posed dramatically. "I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS!"
"I didn't know if it would work until I tried it," Luna admitted.
Deadpool grinned widely through his mask. "And that is why you're best Princess, Luna."
"What?" Celestia and Luna asked, Luna flustered and Celestia confused.
"Sun-butt's a chessmaster, those are boring," Deadpool began. "Love-butt's almost Disney levels of fairy tale, gag me. Twilight's neurotic. But you're the anti-hero on the redemption arc. You're awesome! You're my favorite!" He then whipped out a foot tall figurine of Luna in one of her more dramatic poses, carved out of dark blue Tanzanite.
Luna could not suppress the blush that rose at such praise.
On the throne, Chrysalis chuckled wickedly. "This is going to be fun."
An hour later, Pinkie and Chrysalis were still fighting. The amassed Changeling hordes were in a circle to watch. Deadpool sat with ShiShi in his lap, Thirty-Thirty and Discord to his left, and Luna and Celestia to his right. They watched with varying degrees of fascination, awe, or terror, depending on the pony. One of the horse Changelings kept bringing them snacks, everything from popcorn and soda to hot dogs, hamburgers, salads, and other such things.
"You will not be able to best me, Pink One!" Chrysalis proclaimed. "I can regenerate from any wound, and so long as I have my father's love, my magic is infinite!"
"And I have the Urns of Gaia and Olympus equipped and active!" Pinkie replied. "The blessings of the Gods and Titans make my health and magic power infinite!"
Chrysalis rolled her eyes. "We'll be at this all day."
"Fun, isn't it?" Pinkie called back.
Chrysalis' answering grin was absolutely vicious.
Deadpool grinned widely as he watched the battle. "Go get her, Chrysi!" he called out, cheering.
"You know, Wade," Stuffy spoke up, "I'm a bit surprised you aren't getting more involved in this. Even without anything in the chapter title saying 'Epilogue', it's plain this is the last chapter of the story, the denouement. Ending the story with a bang. How come you aren't out there hogging the spotlight?"
"Because it's not my story," Deadpool replied easily, devouring another hot dog.
"...Come again?" Stuffy asked.
"I know I just did!" Cray-Chry called out.
Chuckling, Deadpool continued. "This isn't my story," he explained. "It never was. I may have played a major role...but from the day she arrived, this has been Chrysi's story. It's about her, not me. This spotlight is hers." He sighed softly. "That's what being a parent is all about."
Silence greeted that statement for a time. "...wow, Wade," Stuffy said at last. "That's...really mature of you. Maybe you're starting to grow up-"
Deadpool leapt to his feet. "Chimichangas for everyone!" he shouted at the top of his voice.
In moments, the entirety of Canterlot was buried under a mountain of chimichangas.
"...I stand corrected," Stuffy muttered as many began eating their way out.
"Oh, cherry flavor!" Luna called out eagerly.
"So does that make them Chimicherries, or Cherrychangas?" Pinkie asked.
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Tatsurou · 13k words · 1,299 33 · 16k views
- Tatsurou · 72k words · 1,205 30 · 21k views
- Tatsurou · 54k words · 1,208 28 · 21k views
- Tatsurou · 52k words · 1,252 30 · 19k views
- Tatsurou · 197k words · 997 42 · 14k views
- Tatsurou · 172k words · 1,637 56 · 21k views
- Tatsurou · 50k words · 1,084 25 · 14k views
- Tatsurou · 59k words · 2,012 39 · 25k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.31 seconds
Total duration
700 users online
1,058,632 hits today, 2,244,100 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Awwwwwww.... It's complete
Sequel?
And thus it ends like it began utterly Ridiculous
While I am in fact disappointed to see it end, I'm more curious to see what the next story that will take its place in the schedule will be.
Damn it! XD its the end, but damn it this was one hell of a good story man, full of laughs and pure epicness
Awesome! hehehe, I approve!
I loved it, and Pinkie from GoW!
Good job man, good job, and keep it up!
I will see you next time!
Loved this one. Too bad it's over, but at least Spardan Pinkie has someone who can actually offer a challenge now!
And of course, the end of one story usually means we get a new one to take it's place! Who could it be now? Celestia with Picard? Derpy with Dirty Pair Flash? Scootaloo with the Phantomhives? Who knows!
Nice, and sequel? Maybe make it take place during the Deadpool movie?
Chimicherychangas...
It was a good story, too bad it's finished, it was funny and exist many comics of Deadpool that Chrissy could copy.
6365111 Same...
NO!!!! It's the return of the chimmicherrychangas!!!!!!!!
Do we get a sequel, or...?
6365220
Ten minutes into the battle - if not sooner - they'd forget they were supposed to be fighting and team up.
This was a fun ride. Deadpool is always great. Also, Tats? If you didn't have an idea for Cadence yet...
The Princess of Love and a sexy ageless witch? You have two games and an animated movie to work with, plus enough characters that you could take quite a few liberties with it like your Applejack one. The first game shows that Bayonetta definitely has that motherly vibe as well.
If that was not the most flawless end to anything involving Deadpool, then I will shoot myself in the foot with a high-velocity Chimicherrychanga.
it's really ending like this? Really? It's funny, sure but... REALLY?!
But where was lady Death?
Does Deadpool stay in Equestria with everyone else?
Do Pinkie and Chysalis just keep fighting in the throne room forever with Deadpool just watching with Discord?
When did Discord get back?
Is Canterlot the new hive for the Changlings?
Do Luna and Celestria still run Equestria while the fight goes on?
Will my questions be answered by the Author itself or by a sequel?
(
INSERT PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED MEME HERE ABOUT TOO MANY QUESTIONS 
)
on a side note: great story I had a blast
I do have to wonder if I just completely missed it, or if Yoggy's gift really didn't make it into the end of the story...
6365240
Busy being invisible.
Yes.
Until they get bored or distracted by something shiny.
During the hour of fighting I didn't cover.
Possibly.
Twilight's taking care of it.
Looks like me.
6365243
It was in the last chapter, titled, "The End of the Story".
6365227 ALL OF MY YES TO THIS IDEA!!!
6365246 Yay answers and ones I can accept, thanks
Was this a reference to DBZ Abridged 48?
6365220
Deadpool has a healing factor, but Sheogorath is literally a God. Even the other Daedric Princes can't defeat Sheogorath; which is ironic, since they created him. The only time that Sheogorath lost was when he wasn't himself and he fought against himself.
6365240
How's this?
6365131 big minds think alike...
and the small too
6365123 .....
sbs.com.au/popasia/sites/sbs.com.au.popasia/files/Anime_Black_Butler_053262_.jpg
I'm hoping Tatsurou does Cadence next.
Only one word can express my emotions right now.
*clears throat*
Wat?
6365249
Completely missed it, aye. Thanks!
Have you thought about applying to work for Marvel and writing Deadpool professionally?
6365292 you don't write Deadpool silly.
Deadpool writes you
6365324
Probably cause she's the responsible one. (Plus Kevin was evil at the beginning).
I personally never heard this story idea, but now I can't stop thinking of how good it could be. Especially if the watch can scan her, now that opens some funny doors!
Of all the possible endings this story could have had, this was certainly one of them.
6365227 THERE'S A MOVIE
And so it came to pass, that the Badlands, aka the Domain of Chrysalis, became one of Equestria's finest allies after the Treaty of Chimicherrychanga. The details of which were sliced out on the battlefield between Pinkie and Chrysi. In blood. Well, more like gallons upon gallons of blood. Details you know?
Also, I support the notion of Bayonetta / Cadance! Goodness knows that Princess of Love is probably an adrenaline-charged mare of action whenever she doesn't have to worry about filing the royal papers. (Alternatively, the dynamic of Bayonetta / Jean is played out by Celestia / Luna...but that's why I'm going to make dinner now. So I can think straight.)
Anywho, been a fun ride! Thanks for writing!
Meanwhile; Galactus, Unicron, Kirby the Star Warrior, and Discord are having a tea party.
you know luna there was another answer there is two people who can counter and even defeat wade using fourth wall breakage,
she-hulk: WHERE IS HE I'M GOING TO RIP HIS FACE OFF AND FEED IT TO HIM.
squrriel girl: oh wade now you've gone and made me really mad!
also I believe deadpool is scared of squrriel girl IIRC
So. Now there is but one question to answer...
Which of the three accounts (If any), were correct in which story would be replacing this one?
Will it be:
The LONG AWAITED Next Generation fic?
The AMAZING sounding Ben 10 fic? (assuming, of course. that Omni-verse [or whatever the newest series of Ben 10 is called...] stays the buck away from it!)
The SPECTACULAR SOUNDING Doctor Who/Doctor Whooves one? Remember, though. It's already Doctor Who canon that a pregnant human in the TARDIS will give birth to a Time Lord, so a pregnant Pony in the TARDIS should be able to give birth to a Time Pony (or is it a Lord of Horsy Time?) as well. Perhaps do Trixie? After the Alicorn Amulet incident, and have her be dying of a magical disease because of that Amulet and Tirek happening so close to one another?
6365462
Hasn't Squirrel Girl been traumatized by Chryssie before? The 'Babysitter Arc'?
6365479
A good idea, but Trixie's story is already done and finished.
6365512 My bet is on a Discord fic next.
Not the line I expected a story like this to end on, but somehow, I don't think there's another that could possibly be more fitting.
PINKIE PIE!!!
FOR CAN'T SPELL SLAUGHTER WITHOUT LAUGHTER!!!!
You egotistical jackass.
Goodnight, sweet Prince-story-hybrid-thing.
Though this story has ended, I'm pretty sure we'll see the two battling in a different story to come *turns to everyone with a massive sign reading 'crossovers of crossovers'*
6365123 Spardan? Wasn't that Appl—Oh. You meant Spartan
... Hey Discord? Can I huddle up in your chaos dimension for a bit, just a bit? PLEASE.
...
Huh? My opinion of Fluttrshy, h-heh, we can put it behind us can't-
...
And he's gone... RUUUUUUUUUUUUN!
The story itself? Crazy in every way and right, stupid to some major degrees, mindfucks fucked the mindfucks until it turned into one huge mindfuck altogether, and we had a whole contribution of hero names just to get them shot down from a bipedal horse...
Still sore about that.
Anyway, it's been... something, and it's went... somewhere, and maybe... sometime, we can look back at this and laugh... somehow.
Anyway, yeah, it's been a ride.
When will there be stories with Celestia, Luna and Mi Amore Cadenza?
6365587
That's what I thought it was, but Luna says Spardan so I figured I just missed something and went with what the author said.
A wonderful story. Well done.
Thanks for sharing these delightfully bizarre horse words with us. Best Deadpool-related fic I've read.
So, these stories are going to culminate in one epic tale of badassery, right? So far we have:
Fluttermedic
Ratchet Sparkle
Pinkie, God of War
Chryssipool
Batmare Beyond
Iron Mare,
Trixie
Applejack, Demon Slayer
The Megamares (Octavia & Vinyl)
Wreck-it-Moon
Spike Aran, Bounty Hunter
And possibly Megas CMC. Ho-lee sheet. This is one epic lineup. So epic, the word 'epic' doesn't quite cut it.
6365587
Although that could have been just as even, but let's face it, Pinkie was a better match personality-wise.
My thoughts exactly... I made the mistake of thinking logically for this story. I wasn't disappointed in the least.