Monster attacks. Crime. Illegal hallucinogens made from electric fruit.

They say things didn't use to be like this. They say things were different, before Luna came back 60 years ago, but Detective Hard "Hardy" Boiled of the Detrot Police Department has never known any world other than that demarcated by the seedy streets of his beloved decaying metropolis; a world in which the coroners sing and dance, surveillance bugs have personality disorders, and the Chief of Police is a scarier entity than most of the eldritch things the city attracts.

The grey unicorn who turned up dead outside the posh High Step Hotel seemed like just another case, but her missing horn is the pointy tip of a very large and nasty iceberg. It's up to Hardy and his friends - a rejected monster hunter, a psychic cab driver, and an underground antiques heir - to find out what’s going on in an investigation that promises to stick more than a cupcake into the very eye of Detrot.

Especially if Hardy has anything to say about it.

By Popular Demand, there is now a Patreon

Additional editing by coandco Sig_Awesome, Hinds, Clint, and Raccoon!
Featured on EQD - 5 Stars!
Cover art by MisterMech (http://mistermech.deviantart.com/)
Now with TVTropes page here!

Princess Luna finds more than a friend in her sister's student, and Twilight Sparkle gets a chance to study the moon and stars far closer than she ever dreamed possible.

An ongoing series of slice-of-life snapshots. Expect a castle's worth of clop-free d'aaawww.

These stories are in continuity with The Rustic & The Romantic and If the Flight Suit Fits.

Now featuring cover art by the inimitable Cerraka (formerly xaztein / crenair)!

Almost all chapters originally written as separate entries for flash-fic blog Thirty Minute Ponies (TMP). I highly recommend a visit to TMP if you're looking for some of the best 1000-word gems in pony fiction. Many thanks to TMP for inspiring me to write!

Plan C - In which Cadance learns that Celestia is the chessmaster, and that her backup plans are the most fun of all.

Game, Set, Match - Twilight tries her hoof at arena combat. Victory or defeat, she's sure to end up a winner with this opponent.

Countdown - Luna swore she'd never do this again, but there's something about that little librarian from Ponyville that tests her resolve.

Twilight Hustle - Rarity's heard some steamy rumors about Twilight and gathers the girls to dish juicy gossip.

All the World’s a Stage - Luna had a wonderful evening with Twilight and sang her heart out about it. Oh, and she might have left the door open.

Every Morning After - Twilight and Luna shared a wonderful, magical night; unfortunately, immortal Princesses sometimes forget about thousand-year-old laws which could ruin the mood ever so slightly.

Names - Luna's had many more names and titles than "Mare in the Moon", and Twilight discovers which of them meant the most.

Great Minds Think Alike - Cadance and Celestia's plan for Twilight and Luna comes to a head, slightly off schedule.

Third Time's the Charm - Twilight's Nightmare Night costumes aren't cutting it. Now Luna's in town, and that may change her opinion on what makes a proper costume.

Monster - Ponyville's been through the ringer lately, but whose fault is it really?

Impossible - Luna's having a bad night, and Twilight came all the way to Canterlot to do something about it.

Early Observances - If you're going to interrupt Celestia's sleep, you'd better have a very good reason.

THAT Letter - Luna and Twilight have to tell Celestia how serious their relationship has become, and they decide to send a letter. Surely they couldn't disagree about how to make such a simple announcement - could they?

Your Turn - Twilight and her friends reveal some personal secrets, and Twilight's is life-changing.

Trembling Joyful Whispers- The Big Day is here for Twilight and Luna! Hear the congregation's comments as events unfold.

The Power Vested in Me- The Big Day is here, but Luna and Twilight are so very, very far from ready. Will their fears get the better of them?

Awkward - Twilight and Shining Armor have dinner with their parents along with Luna and Cadance. They'll probably wish they'd ordered takeout instead.

Absence - Luna deals with a thousand years of angst all at once; maybe she just needs a gentle helping hoof to make sense of it all.

You Were There - A quiet night between Luna and Twilight is almost derailed by a lesson in ancient mythology.

Between Sun and Moon - Luna reads a bedtime story with which she is all too familiar.

Postcards from the Edge - Twilight leaves to study abroad for three months; in her absence, Luna has a stack of mail to open.

Insert Princess T into Slot S - Twilight want to be Princess of Something. Careful what you wish for!

Ups and Downs - Newly-crowned Princess Twilight needs flying lessons. Careful whom you ask!

Amethyst Throne - Princess Twilight is pretty sure she's seen these petitioners somewhere before.

This story is a sequel to Windfall

A brilliant mind discovers a problem in search of a solution, which leads to inspiration, which leads to invention, which leads to a technological/magical advance that will in time forever change Equestria.

Sequel to Windfall, set three years after the events in that story.

The Changelings very nearly took over Canterlot before being ejected. After Queen Chrysalis comes to in the middle of the Everfree Forest, she finds some unexpected company. And they aren't nearly as forgiving as Celestia would have been.

A/N: Re-written and expanded 6/5/13 (please read that if you are just happening upon the story). Image courtesy of Joakaha of DeviantArt. Marked Teen for violent material.

Dismayed after her loss to Chrysalis, Celestia departs the royal wedding reception early, retreating to her royal chambers to console herself with a bottle of wine. Concerned for her sister, Luna soon follows to check up on her...

(Rated Teen for tipsy princesses, and thanks to Junglepony for the cover art!)

Faced with an incompetent captain, orders that make no sense, and a winter of boredom and terrible coffee, the choice for Stoker was to either like it, or lump it. So he chose mutiny instead. Unfortunately, life is seldom as simple as all that, especially in the frozen north of Equestria. Before the day is out, he will have to face a royal visit, negotiations, a terrifying new weapon, and history that wants to be repeated.

With a complete chorus of soldiers, sailors, tractor axle makers, princesses, terrible bars, crossed wires and big mistakes, you could do a damn sight worse than read The Battleship Ponytemkin.

My name is Gilda. I used to be a Griffon warrior, until I got banished.

When you're banished, you've got nothing. No clan, no funding, no gold watch and friendly job reference. You're stuck wherever the Griffon clans aren't.

You do whatever work comes your way. You rely on anyone still talking to you. A speed-freak ex-marefriend. A megalomaniac illusionist working as a middlemare for the EIS.

Family too, if you're desperate.

Bottom line is, as long as you're banished, you're not going anywhere

Windfall takes place seven years after FiM's main timeline. The Elements of Harmony have gone their separate ways, but are still close, and all the girls come running to be there on the eve of Fluttershy bringing her first foal with Big Macintosh into the world.

If you enjoyed this story and this fanfiction future extrapolation, please consider reading the sequel Earth & Sky

To Twilight Sparkle and Princess Celestia, it is a simple surprise visit to Canterlot. To the ponies of the Equestrian Civil Service, it is twenty-four hours of chaos, politics, weaponized dessert, politics, underhooved manipulation of media, politics, and things batrachian and tentacular. Who said bureaucracy isn't exciting?

UPDATE: COMPLETE! You may have heard of Pipsqueak. He's a pinto colt, originally from Trottingham, saved Nightmare Night from being abolished seven odd years ago. Know the one I'm talking about? Yes? Good. Since then he's grown into a charming, cultured hedonist who wants to bed near every mare in Ponyville and a good few of the stallions. He has a slender build and some ponies say he has mares' hips, though he feels that those ponies should shut their bloody mouths. His best mate is the gregarious and multi-talented Featherweight, and his other best mate is the stoic trencherpony and excellent cook Chowder.

This is the story of a Friday, and the wee hours of a Saturday. It's a teacher training day, and Pipsqueak and his friends have no school.

In twenty-four hours, a sinister plot to take down a local business is launched, Snips and Snails dabble in the dark magic of Peyuase, a great deal of debauchery occurs, a cocktail of unrivaled destructive power is created and a small fleet of ships are launched! All of this and more, in Pipsqueak's Day Off!

Massive thanks to LittleSallyDigby for help, editing and advice.