This is the tail of Link, the Hero of Time, savior of Termina, and broken little boy. Link once again ends up in a new land with no knowledge of how he got there. But with no evils plaguing the land, monsters kept in check, and princesses capable of defending themselves, he is at a loss as to why he is in this land. But while he may not understand it, his most faithful companion and friend certainly does. Watch as Epona, with the help of a few special ponies teach Link to take the world off his shoulders and have fun once more.

PS: I do need a beta as I wish to give everyone something great to read.

You are Anonymous, a human from Earth. One day, you got lost in a forest, and came out on the other side in a strange, colorful world. And who else was waiting for you, but a strange, red-haired man with a large pack and a creepy grin. After being forced into being a salesman, you are thrust into a strange, new world to sell your masks and bring happiness to everyone around you.

However, will you really be able to do this, being the only human in a world filled with colorful cartoon horses? And what's with all of the ponies ignoring him in the first place, and focusing all of their shocked attention on you?

Rated for language and mild sexual themes.

* Voted Twice as the #1 Comedy FanFic on Equestria Daily *

Well, what can I say? This is the story of a man. Or maybe he was... a pony-man. Or maybe he was just a... Pony! But he was still...

FIREWAAAAAAAALLLL!!!!

... Yeah, this is that story. The story where a guy goes to a party and wakes up in Ponyville. That guy (I know him as 'me') seems to have landed in his own personal little heaven. Hell, I even brought me a pack of endless cigarettes. How does that not kick all kinds of flank?

So yeah, everything was awesome. The End.

Well, except for The Nightmare. And Trixie. And some jerk named David. Then there was that Azure Flora pony. And that skank princess that steals my goddamn phone!

Listen, summaries just... They just don't cut it. If you want the story, it's provided right here.

Just a warning. I use cusswords like a big boy.

ALSO LUNA IS NOTHING BUT A GODDAMN TROLL!

Okay, I don't know if anyone can hear this, or read this, or whatever, but I'm trying my best to use Pinkie Pie's legendary fourth-wall-breaking powers to try and get a message out.

If you can hear this, I need help. I'm in Equestria, and man, this is strange. But I'm also stuck in Pinkie Pie's body, for some reason.

Yes, it's just as weird as it sounds. And now, I need your help... because all the ponies in this town think I'm crazy!