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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Well we finally get some of that Pinkie and Twilight interaction. I think we need more of that. Pinkie is the reason why this whole story has occurred so she would likely feel guilty and we know that she made a deal with the devil to do it. I feel like she would be likely to be important to the resolution of the problem but I am not sure yet.
Everypony grab your bugspray, Twilight's on the loose! Loved the interaction between Pinkie and Twilight, I was really missing that
Aha! You're back! And so am I. I've been meaning to toss in my two cents concerning the past... four or so chapters, but until rather recently I've been far busier than usual.
Anyway...
I was stoked about the CMC chapter! I was worried you'd forgotten about their little adventure. But I'm still wondering how Shining Armor and Cadence are doing.
Also personally I feel like the screaming matches between characters may have gotten a bit overdramatic since Fluttershy's little "adventure in alcohol". It's not much of a hindrance though. I'd consider maybe knocking down the capslock on some of the more long-winded shouting rants in some of the previous chapters and that'd be about all that would need to be done. Do what you please, however. 'Tis your story.
And I hope Celestia doesn't try to experiment on the pods with herself. I just find fics that show Celestia as willing to sacrifice everything for Twilight to be a bit OoC. Not that I think she doesn't love Twilight of course. I just think that as a wise and just ruler who's been on the throne for over a thousand years, she ought to know how important she is to the wellbeing of the rest of Equestria and all of the other millions of ponies she loves. Pretty much what Luna said to her in this chapter. I feel like Celestia would know when to put aside personal emotion for the greater good. In this case, not potentially sacrificing herself, and by extension the wellbeing of all of Equestria, for just one pony. Whether that pony is Twilight Sparkle, or even her own sister.
Also I think this story really only needs one giant mutant horsefly (hah). Personally, when reading tragedies and other dark stories, I really prefer when the story's focus stays primarily on the conflicts and tragedies of the featured character(s) themselves and doesn't suddenly extend to the downfall/conversion of another halfway through the fic simply because the readers demand it (i.e. the focused character converting and recruiting sidekicks to their cause for help in committing evil deeds; stuff like that).
Regardless, this post is mostly just my opinion, and I want you to keep that in mind if and when you're considering my words. Do what you like and I look forward to reading the next chapter.
3279956 Don't worry, this story is far from over. There will be more Pinkie, I promise!
3281322 Thanks! I did want to do a nice Twi/Pinkie moment, and what better time than just before her transformation?
As for Twilight, yeah, it's time to get the RAID.
3281866 Thanks! The CMC chapter took a long time for me to write. Sometimes I get impatient when it comes to transitions within a conversation, but I really buckled down on that chapter. And as for Shining and Cadence, well...
With the arguments, I was trying to make them worse and worse with each chapter, until they finally reached fever pitch, which at this point, I believe they have. For the most part, though, the time for talk is done, at least for awhile. I guess I did kind of abuse the caps lock a few times, but I really do think that some of these characters would scream every word during a fight if they were emotionally charged enough ::ahem::Fluttershy::ahem:: I'd go back and fix it, but to be honest, I'm too lazy!
Celestia is interesting, because she could go either way. I agree with you, there is a part of her character that is too wise to not see the bigger picture, but at the same time, she has thoughts and feelings, and generally when that happens, there will always be something that makes the character act irrationally. I've always seen the relationship between Twilight and Celestia as very mother/daughter, so if there is one soft spot that she has that would make her act not of herself, it's Twilight. As for what happens with Celestia, honestly, I'm still trying to figure that out myself.
As for other characters, well, I didn't plan on anything too crazy. Suffice to say, I still have some surprises ahead, but no, I don't plan on bringing in some OC guard or something that has all the answers. The story is going to stay centered on the cannon characters that have been presented, for the most part. However, at this point, I'm only about 2/3 into the story in my timeline, so there is plenty ahead.
I hope that alleviates some of your concerns! Next chapter should be up soon!