I'm just a Brony who wants their story read and reviewed
This is a sequel to The Black & White Record. It's been almost two years since that night they first kissed. Now it's time for Vinyl and Octavia to meet each others family. But when it comes to Octavia's mother, things get tough.
Thanks to CometCatcher and Sarged3 for editing
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This is okay, but I'm seeing a lot of spelling mistakes.
Other than that, everything is good, no reason to dislike.
*like*
And now to go on my way.
-Richard
I cannot believe that people are lambasting this story over a poultry typo. What's your beef, huh? Do you just steak out fanfics looking for excuses to press the thumbs down mutton? Quit acting like a misspelled title makes the author evil in-carne-t.
Also: pork, venison, brautwurst.
470495
I LOVE YOU
take my babies
Hehe, I'm too lazy to read what this is based off of although I probably will end up reading it since I have nothing to do. Not like I have any tests to study for. *pushes books off balcony* Nope, LETS GET READING!
"I still have the scar from the bullet though." Wat
deviantart.com/download/289786454/wat__by_haute_claire-d4sj4nq.png
Has potential, just the spelling in some places was just unbelievable.
It sounds funny though. One more thing, perhaps you put the age rating to teen? Just saying
Alright everypony... Alright. The author fixed it. Now lets forget the whole meat instead of meet thing.
Any idea when next chapter will be out?
I really want to read the next one, its a great story, and i dont think i need to point out grammatical errors, haha, but im not complaining. great job
If you're still looking for a proof reader, I can help you out with that. I'd be happy to help you if you'll let me. I won't ask for anything in return, mostly cause they way I see it, I'd be helping out a fellow brony and writer, and that's all I need to know on the matter. Anyway, keep up the good work, and KKA
484034Your Hired
486415
cool, so when do I start?
487259Any time. I don't know how you are suppose to proof read though. I hope you can help me
487863
Ok, well a proof reader basically checks for spelling errors and grammar errors right?. So I could save a copy of this, check where there are errors, then send the copy back with the errors fixed. Actually, now that I think about it that sounds kind of overcomplicated, doesn't it?
487868No I understand it. But could you also give me tips on what I should add?
488025
Well, I'm not sure to be honest. I don't really get ideas when I try to think about it. I'm usually just doing something, then I'm suddenly struck by an idea. That's actually what happened when I came up with fullmetal pony.
488074OK then, well you proof read for me. But what I meant is detail wise any advice?
488118
hmm, I guess some background on Scratch's aunt and uncle and on Octavia's lives with their respective families couldn't hurt. But maybe that could be featured in the next chapter? And if this isn't the kind of details you mean, I apologise, I tend to misinterpet things very often
488162OK then just proof read. Deal?
488296
Deal. I'll start immediately
488311Send it to me when your done.
489080
ok
Tehe, thanks for using that example word for word!
500125I hope you not offended
500676 haha, not at all
! on the contrary, I'm exstatic that you used it and took my advice into consideration. Keep up the good work!
AWESOME
work
u
did
next
chapter
soon
please
501687 Be patient, this takes time
502620 fine
chapter 2!!!!!
517227 I told you to wait. I have other things going on right now, when I'm done I Pinkie Promise I'll have it up and ready to read.
520956 fine
531280 oh
ok
Oh boy! Can't wait to see when they meet their parents. Looking forward to the next update.
555995 ditto
I like it! Keep up the good work!
FINALLY
556253 I ditto your ditto my good sir.
Ha! Applejack Daniels MF WHAT UP!
did they do the spell or somethinng?
561027 What do you mean. Who uses the spell?
561100 Vinyl and Octavia with the unicorn spell that makes ponies pregnant
561130 Just wait and see. I don't give out spoilers.
Can't wait for chapter 2.
Looking forward to chapter 3.
i45.photobucket.com/albums/f55/bcwithlime/TheAwesometer_Fullpic_1.gif
I swear to God, if you post one more chapter, you're probably going to break it.
609787It's that good huh?
SO MANY TYPOS!
Los Pegasus -> Las Pegasus
amassing -> amazing
because so we can get --- wat?
nick name -> nickname
fallowed -> followed
Ahchoo -> Achoo
there were more, but i was too lazy to find them, not to mention grammar errors...
>go here
>find a proof-reader that you like
>have them edit it
>LESS ERRORS
amazing isn't it
pretty good chapter story wise, but get a pre-reader.
wow
Wow that was good I can't wait for the next chapter.
I'm surprised pinkie doesn't recognize her lol