Chapter 3: Of Crystals and Questions
This was really not my day. Or drug high. Whatever. First I'm turned into a horse, or pony. Then I injure myself multiple times, cause a mass panic attack, fall out of a chariot, and get dragged to some fairy tale castle. Now a big white pony and a smaller blue pony who kind of looks like me are glaring at me like prison wardens about to interrogate someone. Which, coincidentally, I think is what they're about to do to me. Fun.
"Explain thyself, Nightmare Moon," growled Luna.
"Are you sure you want that? I don't think you do. It's a very long and strange story," I said.
"We are not going anywhere," she said in return, leaning back slightly as if to prove her point.
"And neither are you, until you explain yourself," said Celestia.
Her horn shone gold for a moment, and suddenly my front legs were tied together with that glowing rope stuff that Twilight had put on my horn and wings, only this time it was golden. I nearly fell over, but managed to right myself. Then I processed what had actually just occurred.
"What just happened? Your horn lit up, and suddenly I'm tied up. How did that happen?" I asked.
They looked at me like I was asking them 'Why is water wet?'.
"Art thou mocking us, or art thou just stupid?" asked Luna, a slight edge to her voice.
"You tell me," I said.
"We won't listen to you or your mind games, Nightmare Moon. Now, how about you explain yourself peacefully, and I won't get Twilight and her friends to blast you," said Celestia with all the class of a criminal mastermind.
"You want an explanation? Fine, I'll give you an explanation. But don't say I didn't warn you."
"It takes more than a few carefully selected false words to sway us, demon," said Luna.
So, I did as they asked and told them everything. I told them about being perfectly fine earlier today, falling in a puddle and probably getting high off it, waking up in a strange place in a stranger body, and being shunned and disrespected until I arrived here and became very confused.
"That," began Luna, "was the most ridiculous thing we have ever heard."
"Two-legged creatures called 'humans'?" said Celestia. "Please. Such creatures exist in an entirely different world, and can only enter Equestria through use of a portal. A portal which is not open right now. Nor would such a portal give you the form of Nightmare Moon, unless you were that world's equivalent of Nightmare Moon. Your fairy tale holds no water."
"And as for us being mere figments of thine imagination, we have not heard such a nonsensical claim since thou first tried to convince us that we were unloved a millennia ago," said Luna.
"You're calling me a fairy tale, yet you're a pair of unicorn princesses," I said.
They looked at me, then at each other. They didn't need to say anything. The look said plain as day 'She's crazy'.
"Right," said Celestia, lighting her horn. A white crystal appeared in a flash, suspended in a golden aura that matched the one around her horn. "Let's try that again, shall we? Explain yourself. Truthfully, this time."
Her strange horn tricks were interesting. Could I do that? Nah, it seemed like something that'd be hard to master.
"What's that?" I asked.
"A crystal with a truth enchantment placed upon it," said Luna. "Shouldst thou attempt to lie, the crystal will crack. We are prepared to sit here all day until the crystal is broken, in which case we shall acquire a new one, or until thou tells us the truth. Whichever comes sooner."
Lie detectors. Yeah, my crap senses are tingling.
So I told them my story again. I told it exactly the same as before, and sure enough, the crystal didn't crack, not even once. The look on their faces was priceless.
"The enchantment must be faulty," muttered Celestia, examining the crystal and hitting it with her hoof.
"Summon another one," suggested Luna.
Celestia did just that, and I explained myself again. It was getting annoying to repeat it. According to the crystal, I was still telling the truth. The two ponies stared at the crystal, utterly dumbfounded. I must have had the most disgusting smirk on my horsey face.
Celestia took a deep breath. "Ok, let's try a different approach. We'll ask you questions, and you'll answer them truthfully. If you're lying, we'll know," she said.
"Can I also ask you questions?" I asked. I seriously needed to know about the stuff my mind was conjuring up. I probably needed to see a therapist or something. Also in the very, very, very unlikely event that this was in fact not a drug high, I needed to know as much about this crazy place as possible.
Luna glanced at Celestia, then spoke, "We suppose, but we reserve the right to not answer thy questions if we do not wish to."
"Deal," I said.
"How did you get here?" asked Celestia.
"No idea!" I replied cheerfully. The crystal remained intact.
"How didst thou create a corporeal form for thyself without the use of our body?" asked Luna.
"Uh...pass?" I said. "I'm not sure how to even begin to answer that question. It might help if I knew what it meant."
"In laypony's terms," said Luna, a frown creasing her face, "how art thou standing before us in the solid form of a pony without having possessed us." She paused. "Unless thou hast taken over one of our beloved subjects?"
"No possession over here. Still don't really know how to answer that question. Presumably, I am solid because I am real, and I exist. Can we not philosophise? I have a question for you now," I said. The crystal didn't crack at any point.
"Go on," said Celestia cautiously.
"Who am I?" I asked.
The two ponies blinked and stared at me.
"Just sum me up in a few sentences, and tell me: Who am I? Everybody around here seems to know me, but I don't know me, and that's problematic. So do me a favour and explain."
"Thou art Nightmare Moon," began Luna. Her eyes had the look of somebody who knows they're walking into a trap, but can't do anything to stop themselves from continuing.
"Partially, thou were born from the hatred and jealousy in our heart a millennia ago, however thou art mostly a dark spirit that preys on weakness and negativity. Thou possessed us, and took control of us. Under thine influence, we attempted to snuff out the light of the sun permanently and create eternal night, but our sister banished us, and thou along with us, to the moon for a millennia. We escaped, and Twilight Sparkle and her friends used the Elements of Harmony against us, and cleansed us of thy foul presence," she said. "Does that answer thy ridiculous question?"
"Uh, kinda?" I replied. Weird. So apparently, I'm some evil spirit thing that nearly destroyed the world for some unfathomable reason. The persona I'd found myself thrust into wasn't very intelligent. How would anything or anyone benefit from eternal night? Everything would just die after a few months.
Unfortunately for me, the crystal didn't crack, not even a little. So apparently it was true.
"Why have you returned and allowed yourself to be so easily captured?" asked Celestia.
A little bit of a stupid question. Why would I tell her that, even if I did know the answer myself?
"When a purple unicorn is telling you to get in a chariot to go to 'Canterlot', you get in the freaking chariot and go to Canterlot," I said.
The crystal remained intact. "Not good enough. Strange vagueness will not satisfy us," said Luna. "Answer the question. Now."
"I don't know," I said. "I honestly don't know. Why am I suddenly a pony? Why am I suddenly in magical pony land, being interrogated by ponies with multicoloured clouds and stars for manes? Strangest drug high I've ever seen. Not that I have prior experience, but still."
The crystal stayed in one piece. "You...truly don't know?" asked Celestia.
"I haven't the faintest idea," I said proudly. I'm not sure why I was proud. Maybe because I had confused them, and they were really starting to irritate me. I'll take small victories, I suppose. The crystal stayed in one piece.
"My turn," I said. "What species am I?"
If Celestia's eyebrow went any higher it'd be breaking a hole in the roof.
"You're an alicorn," she said. "A pony with the attributes and magic of the three separate pony races."
The crystal was still unblemished, so apparently I really was an 'alicorn'. Sounded straight out of a little girl's tv show.
"Why art thou asking such foalish questions?" asked Luna.
"Because I genuinely don't know, and would like to," I said. The crystal didn't crack, so we were all being really truthful here.
Celestia and Luna swapped glances. "Art thou suggesting that thou hast amnesia?" asked Luna. Her 'ye olde English' speech pattern was getting really annoying.
"I suppose?" I said. "I don't know if 'amnesia' is a fitting term if I never was Nightmare Moon to begin with."
"Fascinating," said Luna, stroking her chin with a hoof.
"According to your story, you aren't from Equestria at all, and you think this is a, how did you phrase it, 'drug experience'. Just state that, out loud, and listen to yourself for a second. You're clearly delusional," said Celestia.
"Um, ok?" I said. I looked at the crystal and took a deep breath. "I am experiencing a crazy drug high."
The crystal cracked with an audible 'snap'. I swear I felt my blood freeze.
The two 'alicorn' ponies looked at me with smug expressions. I started hyperventilating again, all the panic from when I first woke up here quickly returning.
"O-ok, I think your crystal thing is broken, because there's no way in hell that this is r-real and..." I trailed off, because somehow, I just knew, deep down, that this was real, and denying it wasn't going to get me anywhere.
The two princesses simply stared gloatingly, as I stammered to myself and searched for something, anything to prove that this was not real. I couldn't.
My mind shut down, and I collapsed to the floor in a heap.
I opened my eyes slowly, to the sight of eight faces with varying levels of concern etched on them. I sat up suddenly, causing the gathered ponies to recoil. I looked down at myself and realised I was still a pony. Unfortunately, that hadn't changed, further solidifying the idea that this whole ordeal was real.
"Are you alright?" asked the white unicorn.
"I just woke from fainting after being told that this whole abhorrent experience is real," I said flatly. "Oh, I'm just fine"
"I was just asking," huffed the white unicorn.
Celestia cleared her throat. "During your, ahem, 'nap', Luna, the Elements, and I have been discussing what to do with you," she said, opening her wings. "On one hoof, you are Nightmare Moon, the evil creature that took over my sister and tried to take over Equestria and shroud it in eternal night. On the other hoof, you don't seem to be dangerous. Nor do you seem to be in complete control of your own facilities, mental or physical." She gestured for Luna to continue.
"So we have decided that seeing how the Elements managed to reform Discord while he was as sane as he could be, it is no stretch of logic to assume that thou can also be tamed. And so we are sending thee to Ponyville, to live amongst the ponies who symbolise the very essence of the Magic of Friendship and hopefully be reformed into a pony who can have a positive impact on society." She spoke the whole time devoid of any emotion.
I was silent for a moment. "Are you serious?" I asked. "Isn't there something better you could do with me, like say, I dunno, semding me home!?"
Luna narrowed her eyes. "A most adrimirable solution, save for the fact that thy 'home' seems to not exist. And even if it did exist, there is no guarantee that we would be able to send you there," she said.
So I was stuck here. Great. Just great. I felt a headache coming on as the ponies around me began to fuss about for my impending departure to Ponyville.
Shortly afterwards, I was bundled into another chariot, along with Twilight's band of merry men. Or mares. Whatever. They tried to make conversation with me, but I gave them one-word answers at best and ignored them at worst, and eventually they stopped. Eventually we arrived back at Ponyville. Twilight led me to a small empty house and gave me a key. She removed the ring and rope from my horn and wings and told me that this was my new home and I should get settled in. Then she disappeared in a flash of light.
I unlocked my new house and went inside. It was sparsely furnished, with basic kitchen fixings, a small dining table and two stools, a bathroom, a living room with a small empty bookshelf and some large cushions on the floor that I guess we're supposed to function as chairs. Trotting upstairs, I discovered another small bathroom and a bedroom, which had literally nothing in it except for a bed and a small lamp on a tiny bedside table.
With nothing better to do, I crawled into the bed and tried to make myself comfortable. My strange new body meant that was easier said than done, and once I was settled I tossed and turned for quite a bit. Eventually, I succumbed to sleep, somehow still clinging to the hope that when I woke up this would all be over...
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musicshuffledotorg.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/its-alive.jpeg
ITS ALIVE
HOLY SHIT THEIRS A PULSE IN THIS FIC
moooooore.
I dunno... for the build up, this chapter comes off as unsatisfying for me.
So... the crystals work, she isn't lying and they are still calling her crazy?
And wow, for beings of such a high stature, Celly and Moonie sure are smug little douchebags. That gloating before obviously distressed, panicked and lost soul...
Not to mention, since she isn't Nightmare Moon, the crystal should break when they answered her "Who am I?" question.
Then again, this is obviously going with "higher forces at work" route. We should expect any and all inconsistencies.
I think I will stay around, but I don't believe it's going to be for long. Not with the direction this is heading in. It's not shaping to be my cup of tea.
5278388
That depends on how you define the process of being. Physically, she is Nightmare Moon and, from this bit, I get the impression that it's a well-known fact that the lie-detecting crystals don't understand nuance or intent.
(Plus, as a previous chapter pointed out, there seems to be some deep magic going on to redefine "Niamh" as "Nightmare Moon" when she says it and that could be confusing the crystals.)
Yay!! An update! Finally!!
*"A most adrimirable solution, save for the fact that thy 'home' seems to not exist. And even if it did exist, there is no guarantee that we would be able to send you there," * It should be admirable
Didn't Celestia admit that there are humans in the other side of a magical mirror?
Unless you remove the reference to Equestria Girls, this story stops working. After all, if it turns out she is really a human trapped in the body of a pony and Celestia could have sent her home, even if it was only once every thirty moons, that makers Celestia look like a jerk.
That crystal reminds me a lot of Hail to the King.
Then what was the point of the crystal in the first place?
I think that was kinda the point.
People don't faint just by having themselves surprised and horrified. People faint when something is genuinely, terribly wrong with their bodies.
Being told you'll never see your friends and family ever again? 'Great, just great'. She'd better have a breakdown later.
more comedey, HHHmmm wonder if my story effected this one. Selene grins *evily*
You know, I've noticed something disturbing about this fan base; all you need to do to get a bunch of up-votes quickly is write a story about a generally stupid, annoying, or, simply put, illogical human being in Equestria, turn them into something that would cause some sort of reaction from the Mane6 or princesses. and slap on a comedy tag on. Seriously, from the first chapter of this, Ten Years Gone, Hail to the King, and many others like them, as soon as readers saw these things, they lost. Their frickin'. MINDS! And just went wild on the up-votes as if one chapter is enough to determine if a story is going to be good or not.
It's really just embarrassing that mindless dribble like this is what get's the most positive reaction from bronies... And people wonder why there are closet bronies; because they don't want to associate with a group consisting of so many simpletons.
It's also sad that this will be down-voted into oblivion by those very simpletons who will only take insult to the truth instead of reflecting upon the flaw in their own character it points out. Seriously, I would like to see some people explain in detail why they up-voted this story instead of just using the same old, generic "GREAT STORY!" "I'M WATCHING THIS!" or "MOAR!"
5278513 uhhh out of curisity, did you take any insperation form mine? i know for a fact that youve read it, so we may have a chain of insperations going here...
5278552 I have read yours a bit. but Death to Nightmare I started on my own with only the idea of a human becoming NMM shared by others. as far as i know I was the first to suggest the human be originally male. And be more comedy then serious.
i would probably be crying if i found out my entire life had just been taken away from me
5278623 I don't think that part has made it to her brain yet.
Luna, it's been two years- Fucking learn modern English already.
Stop blaming others for what was your fault 1000 years ago
How did she even handle that key?
5278528 While I agree that comments should be more informative than "I understood these words. Have an upvote," calling attention to this fandom's flaws like we're the only ones who are clueless is silly. This kind of thing happens everywhere, not just fandoms. Popularity doesn't equal quality, but that doesn't mean everything that's popular is terrible. Instead of whining about how so-and-so doesn't deserve their popularity, write or draw attention to something that does.
The upvote button means different things to different people. Not everyone thinks it means "This story represents all that is good in prose," and quite a few use it to say "Hey, author, I enjoy your work so far and would like to see more of it." It's not a captioned picture you glance at and pass judgement. Personally, I enjoy this story because it's better written than a lot of the dreck I come across, and I'm curious to see what happens next. If it gets bad, I'll downvote it and read something else.
It really just sounds like you're saying "If you don't agree with me, you're dumb and not invited to my birthday party." Congrats, you're smart enough to know people are going to react negatively to your comment. You might as well have just posted "liek if ur continent."
For someone whining about people not explaining why they liked something, you didn't really say much about your opinion of this story.
5278741 Magic
Thank god this fic still lives!
I seen 2 other attempts at this premise by nether one of them is nearly as well executed as yours.
Keep up the good work!
YEESSS IT LIVES.
Nice to see the update, and very well done chapter. I like how you played the whole 'moment of truth' conversation especially how it ended. well played.
Neat, nice to see this story continue.
Hmm! Very interesting! So Niamh isn't experiencing a "drug-high"! Oh boy. I wonder just how she got into all this? Lol. Keep up the great work!
5278528 I'm half-tempted to try out that clickbait formula just to see if it works as readily as you say it does. Hell, now that you mention Ten Years Gone, that's probably exactly what it was to its author. "Oh, I got pissed off that my other story I spent a month working on was a flop, so I wrote the first chapter to this thing in a day." Cue the clearly-telegraphed "screw you" with an inconveniently perpetual 'hiatus' just when that story hits its first big cliffhanger.
5278333 ALIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
This chapter... It feels rushed and tacked on,
I'd leave a proper comment, but all I get is a 'syntax error' message and if anyone replies to my coments, which tells me the comments DO go through, I can't see the responses.
5278511
Just some advice for some people: drink some water if you are in Texas during the summer. Passing out from dehydration sucks.
5278799
That's because I've made my point clear enough on this story already and there has been more than enough negative, detailed criticism on the story thus far that I've openly responded and agreed with; just look back in the comments. Also, I'm asking people to give explanation on why they like the story; I already know it's shit, I'm really curios on how others don't see it also.
Damn Straight! You really think I'm going to invite a bunch of random internet strangers to my birthday? I don't wish to be murdered, sir.
5278931
I figure it could be intimidation that keeps these people from ever getting more than a handful of chapters done once they get overwhelmingly positive responses; like they didn't expect the popularity and suddenly are afraid to go on and disappoint their suddenly appearing fans with a story that doesn't match the hype, effectively freezing up and never finishing... Or maybe these people are just assholes who knowingly exploit the fandom's narrow-minded obsession with certain kinds of stories so as to both get the instant gratification of getting hundreds of upvotes while simultaneously watching on in sick glee as readers beg them to continue something they have no intention of doing.
Either way, there are way too many of these kinds of stories that barely get off the ground but have way more upvotes than complete stories that are way better.
Also, one-shot comedies is another way to easily get in the featured box. You just have to make sure it's decently well written and bronies will eat it up; it's like crack to them.
5279109
I like the story because I find the idea of a human being stuck as a pony, and having a bad time because of it really fun. Specially if the human never watched the show because it comes from an Earth where the show doesn't exist. Bonus points if the human has trouble using magic, because he or she was never trained on using it.
Stories like these are refreshing compared to human turned ponies that become instant experts, have an idea of where they are because they watched the show, can easily used magic even if magic doesn't exist in their world, and basically fit more in Equestria than they did back home.
I have two stories where being a human turned pony sucks.
In one story, I shows the realistic consequences of replacing Twilight with a human counterpart that grew on a world of science (Earth). And so she isn't an alicorn, doesn't even have a cutie mark (Honest, did you really knew what your true talent was a teenager? I know a lot of people that didn't), really sucks at magic due to lack of training. And is in house arrest in the castle both because they can't sent her back yet (The portal only opens every 30 moons and I started to write it way before the Second Equestria girls movie) and because of the mass panic that would happen if the new princess had been turned into a blank flank unicorn.
Worse, the element of magic is stuck on Earth with princess Twilight Sparkle, can you say, Equestria is doomed?
In the other, were I have a co-author, only has two people that really enjoy being a pony out of seven, and one is because as a pony they can walk again, and the other became the Equivalent of Pinkie Pie and her life as a human was really dull and boring. For the rest? They are not happy about it, no sir.
5278574 Damn it, I was just about to post that.
So... first the mane six, then Celestia and Luna, are confronted with a "Nightmare Moon" who seems confused, claims that she does not believe in this place, simply wanders off when spotted, is later easily apprehended without resistance and without doing any damage to anything, shows no trace of special powers, and seems ignorant of the simplest things - all extremely atypical for Nightmare Moon. In a world with illusions, magical disguises, Changelings, and Discord wandering about and pulling practical jokes, it seems like the very first thing to do with a captive who looks like someone but isn't acting like that person is to start checking on things.
Or at least start yelling "Discooorrrrddd! Is this another one of your jokes?"
5279109
Before I go on with this response, let me make this clear: I respect your opinion and I honestly don't care whether you like this story or not.
We clear? Good.
I have to wonder, if you hate this story so vehemently as you claim, why do you keep coming back to comment on it? I'm sorry, but after the first comment you made where you pointed out some of the flaws and agreed with other criticism, you basically stopped doing anything remotely productive to start bitching and whining about why the story sucks and shouldn't have been so popular. If you hate the story so much, why in the name of god do you feel compelled to keep posting responses on it. Especially when nobody has given you any reason to return (replying to you, etc.)
I understand that you don't like the story. I'm perfectly ok with that. It's not your cup of tea, you don't like the concept, and my writing sucks at times. I got that. But honestly, you already stated your opinion clearly several times now. And you've both been agreed with and fought against. At this point it just seems like you're trying to provoke a response, and you've been quite rude and needlessly aggressive while stating your points.
You've said your piece. You can depart the stage now.
5278432
Agreed, these crystals don't look so great.
Doesn't change the fact that they still spout nonsense like
She's not. No matter how much they don't like it, she's not. She looks like Nightmare Moon. That's a mountain of difference. She says she isn't NMM, the crystal (flawed or not) agrees with her and yet they still treat her as if she was the would-be-world-destroyer. If they didn't they would use different words to convey that. They are either idiots or manipulated by external force.
And the fic pretty much all but tells us outright there is external meddling in the works. In fact, without it, there would be no story.
As I said, not my cup of tea. I don't like "a mysterious force takes away all reason" stories. Since this is shaping up to be one...
That's not how truth detectors work. Truth detectors say that someone is telling the truth because it either is the truth or they BELIEVE it's the truth.
In a magical sense, the truth detectors would work the same way, as for a 100% accurate truth detector you'd need an immense amount of magic that even all the Alicorns in Equestria combined don't have access to as for that spell to work it would have to constantly check the ENTIRE UNIVERSE every nanosecond for the truth.
They just gave her a house and left her. No supervision, no nothing. Wow.
5280420
Take a look at the guy's user page; he's done nothing, produced nothing, and follows no one. That account isn't here to do anything other than troll and flame, so you might want to just ignore him from now on.
It is good to see that you are back. Thank you for continuing to write your story.
It was all going great, until this:
I believe that should be "Sending me home"
Glad to see you're back though, this is an awesome story.
5280940 They didn't really have a choice in the matter. They had to to both save the tree, the princesses, and all of Equestria (assuming Discord didn't decide to help out after the mane 6 flubbed up).
Over all, a great chapter, but the end was extremely rushed. I get you wanted to post it, but some details would have been nice. What happened when they arrived? How did ponies react? Why did they just give who they still think a villain a house and leave her unsupervised? How do the Mane 6 feel about this? There's a lot that you just glossed over at the end.
5282123 Feel the same way...
5280630
It's possible they're testing her, keeping her under observation covertly to see what she'll do.
I hope there's a scene later where as part of her 'reformation' Twilight prepares a lecture for her on why Eternal Night is a terrible idea, only for her to immediately agree & start listing all the reasons why (plants dying, the cold, etc) thus preempting everything Twilight was about to say.
Good Job m8. Been hoping for more of the good stuff.
5282399
Truedat
Oh goody! Another dead HiE coming back!
Btw this isn't sarcastic. That would be mean.
They gave her freedom just like that?