Dun... ah you get the point, good job still

Awesome!

no comment...

3325186 Good or bad?

3325308 Both

3325386 Okay then crituqe me both the good and the bad.

3325387 I liked it but I personally felt like it was a drag to read

3325429 Eh sorry about that but I felt that this was kind of a make up to some of my earlier readers, people that have stuck with me since I started, due to the fact I usually post about a 2000 word or so chapter with barely any detail put into them.

3325443 I was here since the beginning of this story. It's good, but this chapter felt like a drag to read.

3325710 Sorry I'm trying real hard to try and make everypony happy.

3327082 I never said the story itself was bad.

3329052 Oh... thank you by the way.

Fluttershy I can tell it's you.

3329071

3329119 What has been your favorite part so far?

3329133 I like the chapter where filly RD eats the bully.

3329173 Why that part if I may ask?

3329262 I liked it because she realized she was a monster or whatever you want to call it.

3329668 Also I forgot to add. Ten points if you can find the subtle nod to r63 Fluttershy in the last portion.

3368010

3368261 Eenope.... Problem Nightmare Moon?

3368270 in all context, this situation is worse than the event with nightmare moon. like way worse, so bad that I think only Celestia could do anything about it.

3457385 But she doesn't know that.

Gods damn that was graphic but very, very well made. Would have cheered in joy if she had killed Rarity but damn, oh well. This is going to get crazy and dark, really dark....count me in

I love this story so much! It's great!

I remember you asking me to real through the story a couple of weeks (if not months) ago and I finally gave myself the opportunity to do so under the serene sounds of the SAW theme song. The occasion called for it so, why not? Anyway, let's start with the obvious.

The bad
Now I'm not going to bash the story on the fact that it is gore, alt. universe or anything the like. What I am going to say is this however. There are structural errors in it, quite the lot actually and I am quite certain you have gotten it over and over and over. Secondly, the capitals...yes they do make it stand out and that's kind of the problem I have with them. Thirdly, oh wait, I think i got everything in this section.

The good
Okay, let me start right of the bat here, I freaking love the premise and the lore you have made up for this story! It is something I haven't seen in the stories I have read through and it truly has a lot of potential in my eyes. Not to mention the entire backstory of how her mother was the original cannibal. Suppose the saying is true. So mother, so daughter, a very, very good job on that! Secondly we have of course Dash herself, an interesting take on the personality disorder and one that is worked out quite well. (Can be even better with some finer detail in the structure) Thirdly, what were you thinking to come up with the idea for those metal teeth? I'm quite curious here actually.

The attitude of both Dash and Sloth are things I can see her doing to a certain degree so you didn't flow off all that much from the canon character, counting mostly for speech here if the show was for an older target audience. But every single event that happens in the story is well laid out in my eyes.

However, in those same eyes it also is kinda hard to follow, now don't get me wrong here as it does create an element of mystery for the reader. That, and I can't read all that well. I'm Dutch so what do you expect, don't even know my own bloody language as well as I should.

Either way, I love the story you are having here. It has its flaws yes, but still a very enjoyable read in my eyes and I'm hoping to see a future chapter of it whenever it may come.

3551867 This... is fucking beautiful. I do plan on going over this story later on and evolving it. Such as a little bit more backstory for Dash and Sloth and the relationship they have.

3563517 *bows in a polite manner and smiles* Always a pleasure darling. I shall look forward to new chapters of the story when they shall arrive. Let's say, once I've started something, I wanna finish it.

3563964 But of course. *sneaks a unconcious pony to you* On the house she's A positive.

3564684 Hmhmhmho, oh deary me. You know what a lady seems to be liking~

3564994 Yeah. Just leave a little blood behind. I like my ponies juicy..... no dirty pun intended.

3565000 *grins* One's sense of humor kinda start to fail that said individual after having lived as long as I happen to have done.

Aaaaaaaand there is no ending. You stopped right at the most interesting spot too! Dammit!
Why won't you finish this? Sure, the grammar is not that great but the plot and characters are quite nice!
Do you have a draft or anything that tells how the story should have ended since it is unlikely you'll ever finish it?

5823885 Sadly no.... but if you want to you can take it up. I will not be upset

5823890
Naw, I wish I could, but I'm a foreigner and a very crappy writer... You can make a post about it in respective groups, I'm sure someone would take it up

Anyways, could you still tell me your vision about what was supposed to happen next? I'm wondering how you would handle the rest of the story, if only in a brief summary. I might suggest finishing this one to a few folks, but I wouldn't count on it. The best way is if you post a topic in applicable group's forum or finish it up yourself...
What made you to abandon it anyways? It is a really nice story from what I can see

5823923 Not really abandoned but I.... forgot about it really. It will still move on later just.... give me time.

5823990 When is the next chapter coming out?

6481952 In all honesty this will be put On Hiatus for a while.

I do hope this gets taken off of hiatus soon.
Because I want to read it due to the premise, but fics that are on hiatus or haven't been updated in over half a year feel like they're dead.

8097965
So, I take it this IS dead. Or am I wrong?

9238005
Oh no it's dead.

9238053
I see.

9238053
Then why does it say 'cancelled'?

9238513
That's the definition of a dead story.

9238576
But you said it wasn't dead!

(Please ignore. I went back and looked at your first comment. And I realized what you said. I'm such an idiot sometimes! Either way, it's a shame.)