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Lilac just discovered that her best friend was recently replaced by a changeling. That would be bad enough, but ever since the monster was outed she's found herself compelled by the strangest urges. Little does she realize that everything about her life is about to change...
Commissioned by Ching for Las Pegassist.
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That was positively chilling. Not the story I was hoping to see you upload, but well worth the read nonetheless.
2657073
I have a few more stories to get out of my system before I put out the next time loop fic, but I promise it's coming
And this is among the many reasons I follow you.
Well done.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Well, I read this story with mixed feelings.
On the one hand it is very well written and probably one of the better stories about this topic (unfortunately most things about changelings have already been written in one way or another, so the plot of this one wasn't exactly new). It was a nice read, especially that foreshadowing you did with Lilac's changes. And even though the general topic is already well-used you managed to bring in many original ideas.
On the other hand it was just that: a perfectly normal story. This is of course only my opinion but the thing I most liked about Duel Nature and the two time loop stories was this... well, I'm not even sure how to call it. Those stories just have written your name all over them (umm, metaphorically). It probably is that kind of sarcasm or the dry, half-serious comments or whatever you want to call it, those things that make you think you're not actually reading some story but hearing a tale from Twilight Sparkle herself. As you said in your interview, this probably is because you and Twi have a similar mindset. Of course you shouldn't just write out of her perspective; this story is perfectly fine. It's just, well, normal.
So, um, what I just want to say is that this story is like "What a nice story, I think I'll upvote it" whereas the others were "MOAAARR!!!1111eleven". Hope that makes sense...
(I still would love more stories, though. Again, this is perfectly fine, just not as 'special' to me as some of the others are.)
2657411
The original prompt the commissioner requested was as follows:
Alternate interpretation of Changelings: An artificial species created by magic.
Changelings are hollow. Empty inside. This is emotional as well as physical.
Changelings were once ponies afflicted with envy.
The ability to change is granted by a magical disease spread by changeling feeding.
When changing into another, a part of the pony is lost. They will become distant and start to manifest changeling physical traits. Eventually they become void of emotions and must feed on others to sustain their "selves". When they become a changeling, ponies are contacted by the swarm. Those who are able to retain their identities may become officers. If a changeling is unable to feed, they will eventually lose all individuality and become just another drone in the swarm.
Possible bits:
Changing is more physical than illusion. Imitation flesh grows or burns away. Painful both ways.
Possible plots:
A pony's descent to a Changeling drone: Their infection, corruption, transformation, service, and eventual loss of self.
I hope these concepts are somewhat interesting to you.
I'll stick this in the author's notes, people might find it interesting to see what I did and didn't use.
Now this is the type of evil-changeling story I like to read.
Very original. Faved and liked.
That was a very dark and intriguing look at changeling development. Glad I took the time to read it.
That hurt to read. As in emotionally.
Eesh, that was tough to read. I like this alternate take on changelings, and your execution was horrifying. Lilac's downward spiral made sense and each step seemed reasonable, which heightens the shock. This was an excellent one-shot. Thanks for writing!
2657423 I might have to add some of this to my headcannon. Also, we now need a changeling-emoticon.
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It's a great prompt, right? I'm lucky Ching gave me such an interesting concept to work with. When I posted the auction I was terrified that I was going to end up having to write a 5,000 word HiE clopfic or something
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I was originally aiming for a length of about 8,000 words, but stretching it longer gave it more time to build. I think keeping the slide into darkness slow but inexorable heightens the horror element. If I wanted to shave it down I'd have had to cut the spa scene or maybe the bit in the store which I like too much to axe.
2658185
Oh, I just meant that it was emotionally tough to read, not that it went on too long! I thought it moved at a good clip, personally.
Hmm, 5k word HiE clopfic, eh? Taking commissions anytime soon?
2658208
A penny a word and I reserve the right to pretend I know nothing about it once it's finished
This story was interesting, and the ending was horrifying. That is both a good and a bad thing. You did a great job with the story from a literary stand-point, but it's not "my cup of tea" when it comes to changeling stories. So, I'm kind of split here. Liked, but not faved.
2658215 5k X 0.01= 50
damn 50 bucks for a 5k long story or is that just for clop based ones
tell me how much it costs for a none clop story commision and depending on the price
i might just pay you to do something for me.
2659052
I hadn't seriously thought about it, but I guess that would be the price for any story, clop or otherwise. I've never written clop, though, so I promise nothing in terms of quality.
I guess I would have to set up some kind of paypal account or something too. PM me, I might be open to the idea.
aka magical vampire i like this idea i prefer then to be a seperate race all together but thats just me this is a great idea and the ending saddened me :( but i got over it :) do write more with this idea i would love to read it.
Zombies? I thought this was a changeling fic!
Ah, I kinda wish this were a tad longer. When Lily murders her family, it seems a tad surprising. I can understand the reasoning, given the circumstances, but it's still a tad sudden. I suppose if it's a commission, it can't be helped.
2659255
D'oh, thanks. Fixed.
I bandied around the idea of a less dark and more tragic ending where after Lilac puts Pewter in a coma she goes to the schoolhouse and watches Honeybee playing and quietly says goodbye, slipping away without her noticing and the ending is just her going into the forest. I decided that I'd rather complete her fall from grace and the rejection of her old family in favor of her new one, though. I suppose another thousand words between what happens to Pewter and the end might have helped a bit.
2659273
I was rather worried about her transition between actually having a conscience and being a complete monster. The whole choice being easy thing just really, really disturbed me -- I mean, I suppose after putting her spouse out of commission for a good long time, is it really a logical next step to kill her child? I suppose I wouldn't know, seeing as I haven't quite been put in a similar situation before. I think another thousand words would have helped quite a bit, yeah, but it is what it is.
That was horrifyingly amazing. Her downward spiral is horrid! My favorite part is the physical/scientific aspects of it of the fire making physical changes.
For a commissioned piece, this is actually really good! I kinda like this alternate interpretation of the changeling. It dovetails perfectly with my current headcanon about the species, specifically its origins.
That said, I do have to agree with 2659338 on this one. The transition came on all too quickly, I thought, but it wasn't entirely unreasonable.
I have to say, the downer ending is perfect here. I'm normally a sucker for happy endings, but having Lilac do what she did was just perfect and really detailed the whole "fall from grace" concept.
Well this was fun...right up till the end
I like this story a lot!
Even though my brain has just exploded due to a headcanon misfire.
But seriously, nice job!
Oh Noes.
Well, that was quite dark.
I don't usually read dark stuff, but it was by Eakin and I just had to take a look. It's not my usual cup of tea, but I'll allow it.
15% of my way into the story. DAT DREAM SEQUENCE. My thought: "Oh, no, we're gonna do this?"
She picks up her kid and I realize, "It spreads. Like zombies." Bit later: nope, it's vampires this time. Filly, are you going to do the sensible thing and kill yourself?
With the husband: you horrible, horrible person.
With the ending: DEAR GOD AUTHOR, STAB ME IN THE HEART WITH MORE FEELS, WILL YOU!?
Glad I read it, took me a bit to get round to doing it though.
...
Pinkie! Get your murderous alter ego out here! We have a new disturbing fic to read!
This is dark. Can't say I enjoyed it, exactly...but it is well written, and convincingly succeeds at what it sets out to accomplish.
...hoo boy. That was dark. And I loved it.
There is something unsettling about a good changeling dark fic, more so than any other types dark fic. The corruption, the change, it's all very disturbing. It goes beyond gore or violence, it is true horror. This piece presents it perfectly. Very well done. Greenthumbed.
I wonder if the writers of FIM knew that when they introduced Changelings, they introduce a true horror into their universe. That these things were not quite suitable for a children's show.
That was interesting and well written, but I just can't really buy the immediate execution approach to dealing with captured changelings. Unless I'm completely forgetting something, it doesn't have any basis at all in the show so it feels very tacked on to an otherwise non-apparently dark Equestria.
Still, thumbs up for the overall quality.
Needs more inner conflict. But what you need much more urgently is deeper exploration of the physical transformation.
What's a vampire/werewolf story if it doesn't put heavy focus on the physical manifestations? We didn't even get to see anything said about her new gossamer wings she is supposed to be having! Or the chitinous covers for them! Or fangs! Or the horn all changelings were seen to have!
2659059
... Is murdering your family really rated everyone?
While this does look good at second glance, at first glance the title made me cringe. Usually itneeds to be something short and catchy, 'change is coming' would read much better at first glance, imo.
2661991
Technically, at the end of the story nobody's died...
2662118
It's the name of a song, although I chose it for the word "change" more than any particular thematic ties.
2662169
No sir, I don't like it. But I'll deal with it.
Wow. If there's one thing I've learned about you, it's that when you go dark, you go dark. Not in a grimdark fics-that-shall-not-be-named gorefest kind of way, but disturbing, sometimes kind of psychological dark. I love it!
Also, people do written commissions now? That seems new, even if it probably isn't.
I didn't like it. I have favorited and upvoted it.
To explain: It was well-written, well structured and didn't have any over unnecessary narrative. I didn't like it because I've been reading way too many stories recently with feel-good endings, and this one was tragic and left me feeling sad and depressed.
So bravo, Eakin, on another brilliantly well made story. Now excuse me, I'm gonna go read something happy
2662824
I can't even stand to read gorefics, much less write them. I do like being mean to my characters, though, so obviously psychological torment is the way to go. This is probably the most... I guess the right word would be hopeless... thing I've written.
I know a bunch of folks volunteered story writing commissions for the charity auction, I don't know if anyone does them on a regular basis for money.
2662940
Think of it as a mental palate cleanser that'll just make you appreciate the happy in other stories that much more.
2662999
I don't know, the alternate ending to Hard Reset was pretty desolate.
2663038
Yeah, I guess that was pretty bad and got even worse when we looked in on her during Stitch. Good thing I've got one more chance to look in on what she's been up to since
2663051
Considering what happened in Stitch, I really don't think that reunion will go over well at all!
2657411
This is basically my view on it.
Anything I've read of yours is gripping, and like I was changeling-mind-controlled, I couldn't stop reading. Even though I disliked the story. That definitely takes talent.
Pity I'm a sucker for happy endings; I kept holding out a shard of hope that it would be like the show and everything turns out alright.
Keep up the good work!
Oh wow, that was pretty messed up. Ah well, at least it had a happy ending. No! Bad! Eating children is not a happy thing.
2663051
I can't imagine it being anything good. Alternate Twilight becoming evil and crazy doesn't make me feel any better about her being doomed to eternal suffering in a time loop, especially since that is what drove her mad in the first place. Poor girl should just be allowed to die already. Maybe if the time loop resets enough her own multiverse will eventually tear itself apart.
This fills me with genocidal fury.
Good job, I feel dirty now!
That... last... line...
I absolutely love this.
Also because I am a changeling so......
Seriously this might be my FAVORITE FANFICTION.
EVER.