It's said that dreams are actually portals, well gateways if you will. These gateways can lead to distant worlds or even parallel universes. Anon however doesn't put much stock in such notions, to him it is all an elaborate firing of neurons within his brain. Something like alternative universes are just wild delusions. One Day however Anon finds himself in a weird dream, one from which he can't seem to wake.
Status
Finally took the time to go through my entire story, the earlier chapters needed to be rewritten as they were in the wrong person and the later chapters need to be reformatted. I've completed both objectives hopefully improving your reading experience.
Also, check out my attempt at remaking the prologue in visual novel format
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_n3axe1Us8A&feature=player_embedded
I started this story a while back and posted a bit of it on 4chan and pastebin, but then I hit a bit of a road block. I've pretty much climbed out of it for the moment but feedback would be cool. I'm at the point where I'm split on which direction I want to publish since I made a good 3 difference splits from this point on.
A.I.E?
that wasn't a long description at all!
followin'
the description is almost as long as the story... just saying
Man I'm a scrub, at least I managed to get my chapters right. It was quite late in the night... Or more like early in the morning when I first posted the story.
*neurons
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ty
You keep switching between second and third person.
Other than that, this is a good story. Keep it up.
Says chapter 7, should be chapter 6. That's all.
Change the rating on this one to Teen, language and situations are far from the Everyone tag.
Also, since an act of sex was referenced, I think you may need a Sex tag as well. Could be wrong about that one though.
You are switching between second and third person a lot. Which is it?
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Damn it! And this time I even tried staying in third person! Curse my fail writing!!
Maybe I'll go back and just make the entire story 2nd person. But really it's like sometimes I feel like writing in 2nd and other times 3rd. I'll try to stop that >_>;
Also--
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updated, but I don't think I need the sex tag only because it was just an accidental eyeful with no lust on either sides.
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corrected, one day I'll release a perfect chapter D:
Are Discord and Nightmare gonna show back up? If not I don't think they had enough of a role to warrant their own tags.
Edit: whoops, accidentally posted this twice. That's what the deleted comment is. FYI
All in due time, what I have so far is just the opening, poor Anon hasn't even finished his first day in Ponyville, I've got this story setup to run through the Canterlot Wedding, The Chrystal Empire, and 2 or 3 original arcs. Also I feel I must say this now, that I plan on using some things from season 3 but Twilight won't be going Alicorn and Discord won't be getting reformed due to storyline purposes.
2440425 i like third person the best personally (because it dose not feel like you are reading the story to someone else) but i can deal with it
Chaaaarrrrllliiiiieeee! lol this is the second fic i've seen on this site too ref that
i mean come on its pure gold people!!
fav'ed
Well then...
well... color me surprise.
Feel extra writey today
Begin writing another chapter in DotM
PC blue screens
Takes my soul and all of my work with it.
Open word hoping that some of my progress was saved.
2 sentences out of five dozen were saved.
I'm going to sleep.
That sucks, my laptop blue screened few months ago but I shut it down within seconds and turned it back on, but nothing was lost....
great mini chapter
huh, dat was interesting. so in his dream his memory is fighting to resurface?
very nice
cant wait for more
Was this prologue even necessary? It feels like it would've fit better in a later chapter as a memory bit. Anyway, will continue reading now.
I'm irritated but interested enough to continue I think. I just hate story that mess with the mind. If it is memory loss or fake memories it really gets me angry.
1. It's far to easy to hit a restart button.
2. It ALWAYS leaves someone lonely, sad, and depressed.
3. It's gets really complicated really fast.
4. I haven't seen a story yet that pulls it off even remotely successfully.
5. It's a really jerkish move to pull on anyone.
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Lol sorry that it rubs you that way bro, but the memory loss is especially crucial to the plot in a way I believe no reader will see coming, though if it bothers you and you don't care about spoilers I could always tell you how shits gonna go down. Or at least drop a hint.
2880571 It's just something that irks me whenever I see it. I'll still be following the story though so no spoilers!
Lol human working on apllejack's. apple orchard is so cliche... such as helping in post office(derpy assistant), or in roseluck flower shop... lol.
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Indeed it is, Rarity told Anon she would look around and only suggested AJ as she knows that running a farm is tough business. Don't assume that he will be offered a full time high paying job or that he will only have one job. I'd say more but why spoil the fun?
oh shit an alliance between two villains this could end badly
Speaking "bro" towards girl?
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Ah sorry, should have added that he was dripping with sarcasm. Its kind of like his signature retort.
please mention we have planes that can fly several times the speed of sound
that will wreak her mind
3194476 no it won't, she'll just curl into a ball and then do some ridiculous actions and training to make herself faster than what was said in order to be the fastest pegasus in the known worlds... although I imagine some hospital time being in order so have fun with that Dashie
3193381 kind of a tomboy, figure why not right? besides she's probably the closest thing he's going to have as far as a bro... Spike's a baby dragon but there's potential for him to be a 2nd Lieutenant of the bros. And Big Mac? I smell Cider... hard... Applejack Daniels... Cider... So ya he could be a bro. But other than that not a whole lot of dudes in a town mostly full of ladies... kind of a lucky bastard really even though they're ponies... go xenophillia
3193827 img.neoseeker.com/mgv/499846/846/58/urlhttpi0kymcdncomphotosimagesoriginal000202866the_more_you_know_filly_dash_by_misteralexd41zqwy_display.png
3197962that sounds about right lol
hue hue magic. Good chapter, I award you with +1 internetz
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great chapter
glad to have you back in the swing of things
Welp, I finally read this story all the way and all I can say is this deserve a fave.
Good job, I can't wait for more.
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Ty all, and for all the current readers today I finally finished outlining the five planned arcs that this story will consist of. Currently we're barely into the first arc that unfortunately is the least action-y of the five arcs. I'd say we're a third through it? Hard to really throw numbers at it would saying what it actually contains ~_~
Anyway, I'm off to work on Chapter 15!
3704647 holy mother of pony! five ARCS?! this is gonna be one long and epic ride
3705940 mein-neger.jpeg
we are now friends, i see you at most of the stories i read
3896439 Very well then i shall follow you
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I was not thinking of pony butt...
If only I could double favorite a story...
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And now I'm seeing a zoomed-in look at Jimmy Neutron's brain showing streams of millions of little Jimmy Neutron heads zipping around.
I just noticed the like counter. Why the hell doesn't this have more likes? I mean Anon isn't unlikable and he's certainly not a Mary Sue -- he was overpowered in his own lucid dream but that was it. What, does the author at some point further in praise Hitler as a visionary or something?
Hmm... sounds like Celestia, perhaps thinking him a villain attempting to free the Nightmare, put a stop to his little visits. With fire.