The final tales of Prince Onyx.
Last chapter.
“Sleep well little prince, because tomorrow you will start your new life as my pet.” Said the Changeling Queen as Onyx lost consciousness. She passed her tongue over her fangs, still tasting the steely taste of the blood before she cleaned up the neck of Onyx to dissimulate every trace of her bite on him. Satisfied with her work, she drop down from the bed to let the prince gain back his strength. She felt a little bad for him, since she knew that he was innocent in the murder of her mom and that he had even saved one of her kind many years ago but wars demand sacrifice and Onyx will be one of them.
Laying on a chair next to the bed, she put one of her hoof under her chin and took a closely look at her pray, thinking about what she was going to do, a part of her did not wanted to hurt him, her seeking of vengeance was not the problem of Onyx and she felt a bit of culpability for Onyx especially since she knew what would happen next to him but those feeling quickly disappear as she rose up from her seat. What has to be done must be done she thought and she could not let herself fall into weakness because of him.
***
The door of “Cadence’s* room opened slowly as Chrysalis was making sure that nopony could be able to see her before taking back the appearance of the love princess. Locking the door behind her so no one would be able to enter in her room and see the prince on her bed, she made her her way to the royal kitchen where she had an appointment with the new cook in charge for tasting the treat that they will serve at the reception. As she was slowly making her way she could not keep himself from thinking how disgusting her appearance was. Having to live in a body made of pink and yellow fur make her want to throw up each time she was passing in front of a mirror and she was feeling like if she was wearing garbage. Chrysalis did not have to admire herself to know that her beauty could not be match. She only wanted to get rid of this marriage as fact as she could so she would be able to reveal her true form and get rid of this disguise. There was a beauty to her original form unmatched by the pompous pony princesses, by the preening unicorns, the haughty pegasi or the casual Earth pony. Her black carapace almost sucked in the light of the green torches lining the halls of her castle and her mane fell about her withers like the water from their reservoir. No other changeling among her hives could hope to imitate the perfect form of her legs or the regality her face radiated and to add to this she had the shape of a perfect heart on her neck which make her again more irresistible for her subject.
But as she was lost in her self contemplation, Luna who was passing by bumped into her and by the same way make them both fall on the ground.
“Ow ow ow! Thus are sorry Cadence, We..I mean I was lost in my thought and I did not see thou on our ways.” Exclaimed Luna, getting up on her hoof and helping the other alicorn to do the same.
“It is fine really, It is my fault too since I did not see you on my way.” Answered “Cadence” while Chrysalis thought to herself that she was happy to be skilled enough in shapeshifting magic to be able to keep her disguise even when she was surprised by the sort. “So...where were you heading to?” Asked Chrysalis, trying to act as the same way Cadence would do in the same situation.
“Ho I was going to head back to my room before we depart for the dragon kingdom. Like I said you yesterday, I would have loved to stay for your marriage but duty shall come before personal pleasure.”
“yes yes of course, well I wish you a good and safe trip aunt Luna.” Said “Cadance” not wanting to stay too much time with Luna in case she would see behind her disguise.
“thank you Cadance and I wish you a wonderful marriage...but we don’t know if we should say that but you should go take a shower before you go anywhere else, We, I mean I am still able to smell what you and Shining must have been doing this morning.” Exclaimed Luna before leaving a slightly confusing Chrysalis behind her, which took immediately the way to her shower.
***
Later that night, while their Queen was doing the necessary preparation for the upcoming invasion, the changeling army was patiently waiting at the outside of the city, hiding in the nearby forest waiting for the pink shield to disappear. Most of the army was sleeping under the cover of the stars. But only a few changeling knew is there was a small dispatch of changeling who have been sent out to the Gryphon Kingdom to deal what could possibly become a treat. Now that small group of Changeling were at the edge of the forest beneath the mountain who was abriting the capital of the Gryphon Kingdom. Most of the Changeling were asleep, one of them named Fillia could not find the peace of mind necessary to fall asleep.
“Hey Fillia is everything alright.” Asked a comrade behind her.
“Yes don’t mind me I’m just thinking too much once again and worrying myself for nothing.”
“If you say so.” Answered the changeling. “But still try to get some rest, we will need all our force tomorrow afternoon when we will be inside and don’t worry about those patrols, I had never fall asleep while I was on the night watch.” Said Proudly the Changeling.
“I guess you're right thank you.” Replied Fillia. “Still...I have a really bad feeling about the rest of our army in Canterlot” Though the changeling for herself before thinking back as what Chrysalis told her before she had left for the castle.
***
“ My Queen..I..I think we should cancel the invasion.”
“And why would I do that?” asked back Chrysalis in a calm tone.
“Be-Because even if we do succeed in our attempt to take control over Canterlot, the other country will surely come to their defence when they will heard of what would have happened and I don’t think we have the military strength necessary to stop 4 other kingdoms from taking back the castle and this is without calculating the soldier we will have to dispatch to the corner of Equestria to take control over the various small village populating it.”
“This is a good point you are presenting to me Fillia but don’t you think that my chancellor and war council had already pointed out?”
“M-Maybe..I have not thought about that...So if we are still going to do this invasion, does it mean you have find a solution to the problems?”
“Unfortunately I can’t reveal this information, only a total of three living subject know this answer and this information is classed top secret but I can assure you that everything I does is for the good of my Kingdom. Now leave me, I must prepare myself.” Said back the changeling Queen, Dismissing her spy with a wave of her hoof.
“As you wish.”
***
“But what is this plan….?” FIllia questioned herself before falling in a dreamless sleep.
***
Darkness, silence, loneliness, Those were the only thing Onyx was aware of. His body was no longer responding to him and his mind was stuck in a phase of fear, panic and sadness. He was feeling like if each muscle of his body were being set on fire. “Help me.” Whimpered the prince “Please someone help me...I,,, I can’t move..It hurt too much.” His voice was swallowed by the surrounding darkness, no one answered his call for help. “Please I Can’t move Please mom Luna Twilight where are you!” Once again a heavy silence surrounded his words. Uneasiness wrapped the soul of the young prince, seizing him unexpectedly. He felt a strong impression of emptiness and loneliness. A infinite sorrow seize him, causing him severe respiratory difficulty, dizziness following by palpation and a extreme weakness. The prince cried for a long time without being able to hold his tears then, emptied of his strength, he fall into a dreamless sleep.
How many days go by before he gain back his strength and try to find a solution. No one would be able to say so. A strong fever had made him go crazy and semi-conscious, he tried to end his life without at many occasion without success. His tentative had of course make him to gone even more mad. While in his fit of insanity, Onyx had supplied the gods to come get him and put an end to this and in the absence of any answer he had insulted them for days. The supplice lasted like that for days who had felt like years for the prince. It only when his moral was at the lowest, when the overweight of the solitude was crushing his heart any hope and his soul the smallest bit of confidence, when no solution was presenting to himself. Onyx heard a whisper in his ears.
“Here we can’t die boy, here we suffer.”
“Who are you?” pronounced painfully the prince. “Help me please.”
“I am no one...And I help no one.” Answered the voice. “Everyone must deal with their own suffering. It how it work and I can’t change it.”
“But...Where are you. I can’t see anything it too dark here.”
“The light can’t come here.” Explained the voice. “Here nothing as any importance. No one can obtain what they want, here in this world there is no hope possible. We live here, my brother and I, in powerlessness and discouragement. I wish you the welcome.”
“You are many here?” Trying to see through the darkness.
“We are thousand here, maybe millions and soon you will join us.” Asked Onyx not sure if the voice was a foe or a friend.
“You will soon learn that you are now alone and forgetting by your friends. You future lies in your capacity to accept the fatality. No one will ever find you here and you will suffer for the ternity.”
“No...No no no please leave me alone.” Cried Onyx but the voice did not listen to him and soon an agonizing pain shot through the body of Onyx, when the pain stopped he heard three distinct sound who seemed like an object hitting a something made of wood.
***
Meanwhile in the royal bedroom, Celestia was laying on her bed, a scroll in front of her and a glass of wine in her hoof. She was reading a list of what would be needed to do before the wedding start tomorrow, taking a sip of glass, she could not keep herself from thinking how thing would be different if she was the one who was going to be married. First she would have chosen to organize the marriage somewhere more exotic than the castle and instead of a huge reception she would have wished a small party with only her closest friends and family present.
Letting out a loud sight, she ended her fantasm of being married and rising up from her bed, she took the direction of her balcony to take a bowl of fresh air.
“Still, Having a husband would be nice for when I felt lonely and Onyx could have a more masculine example to follow.” She thought before somepony knock at her door.
“Yes come in.” Answered Celestia.
“Hello mom.” Said Onyx as he enter in her room. “I just wanted to pass by and wish you a good night before I go to sleep, We must be in good shape tomorrow for Cadence wedding. “
“How sweet from you honey.” Answered back Celestia, trotting to her bed she laid there and invited her son to do. “Come over here, Mommy need a hug from her most precious thing.”
Onyx rejoined her on the bed and they both shared a hug, for several second they did not move or talk and simply enjoy the embrace of each other.
“So, tell me.” Asked Celestia, breaking the silence of the bedroom. “ How was your day today? Cadence did not make you work too much? and have you met Twilight yet? She came by train today to help out organizing the marriage and say hi to her brother and soon sister in law.”
“No no, Cadence is really sweet and did not ask too much from me today.” Answered back.
“And what about Twilight?” Questioned back Celestia, clearly wanting to know how thing were going out for her son and most faithful student.
“No i did not see her today.”
“That it? You're not even excited that she her? I thought you wanted to see her for fix what has happened a long time ago between you two. Are you feeling sick or something?” Asked Celestia, surprised by the lack of care that Onyx was giving.
“No no I’m alright mom, I just...got over with it I can’t stay stuck in the past you know.” Answered back Onyx who was now rising up from the bed and started to leave the room.
“In any case I just wanted to wish a good night before the final preparatif of Tomorrow...Good night mom.” Said Onyx as he closed the door behind him, leaving his mother alone.
“Good...Night sweetie…” replied back Celestia, not sure if her son was telling the truth or not.
***
After he had said his good night to Celestia, Onyx had rejoined Cadance who was waiting for him in her room. The false Cadence had made Onyx switched the scrolls that Celestia was reading with one of her own creation. The difference between them was minime but essential for Chrysalis plan since it would make the guard patrol the wrong section of the city.
“You did good my little pet, now come we have much more to do before tomorrow….”
***
Twilight casted a light spell from her horn to see where the evil Cadence had sent her. She could not believe how evil could Cadance be. She knew that something was not right from the moment she met her back on the balcony with her brother.
“I should not had let my guard down. I should had try to find more proof of her being evil before I accused her in front of everypony else.” Thought Twilight.
“Hello? Is anyone there!?” Yelled the purple unicorn as she walked through what seemed to be a cave of some sort, trying to find a way out of there before laughter could be heard. Twilight tried to find where was the source of the voice without success.
“W-where am I?”
“THe cave beneath Canterlot, once home to greedy unicorn who wanted to claim the gems that could found inside.” Answered what seemed to be the reflect of Candace on every shard of the said gems. “And now your prison.
Twilight cried for help as she run aways from the walls, scared by the sight of so many Cadance.
“IT no use, no one can hear you.” Laughed the false Cadence as she seemed to enjoy the distress of Twilight. “And no one would ever think to look for you either which is why is the ideal place to keep the one who try to interfere with my plans.”
Twilight who was trying to remain calm profited of the occasion to try to squeeze of as much information as she could from her foal sister.
“Plans? What plans?”
***
Meanwhile, far away from Equestria and the wedding of Candaze, the gryphon Emperor was enjoying his usual meat dish after having taking pleasure to the torture of a few unlucky maid.
Griffin had learned since the council that if he wanted to had his revenge on Onyx, he will had to be patient and so since that famous meeting, he had tried to not think about him and only keep his mind focused on all the pleasure being the Emperor could give him.
“I think I could enjoy some release from one of the young girl who work at the market after this, Humping their weak and tight body while they are crying…Yes I think I find what I will do for the rest of the day.” Taught the Emperor out loud as he already started to imagine himself being taking care of by those young child. But since he was so absorbed by his disgusting fantasy he had not heard the returning patrol enter in his throne’s room and it only when one of them coughed to catch his attention that he finally paid attention to them.
“Why did none of you knocked at the door before coming in?! But nevermind that, since you are here why don’t you go get me one or two of those orphans from the market and take one more for your self pleasure too, I feel generous today.” Asked to Emperor to his guards.
The Emperor who was used to be listened right after he had given an order, had not realised that none of his guard had moved and they were all continuing to staring at him.
“...Guards I gave you an order, I said go fetch me one of those orph-” But his order was interrupted as a sharp pain shot through his back and blood started to pour into his mouth.
“Chrysalis send you her regards.” Whispered Fillia to the Emperor, taking out the dagger she used to stab the Emperor from his back.
The Emperor tried to grab the Changeling between his talons but Fillia who was far more quick than him dodge the attack and flew behind the gryphon guards.
“Guards! Catch th-that monster and h-help me.” Ordered the Emperor but the five guards who, so far had made no move to help their wounded Emperor, bursted in green flames, leaving now five Changelings and each of them was pointing a crossbow in the direction of The Emperor.
“No...No this can’t be happening, your species is supposed to be extinct! This can’t be true! I've killed your leader, you should not still be alive!” Yelled the Emperor. “Guards guards Your Emperor need your help!!”
“No one will come to save you Griffin.” Answered Fillia. “ Your “guards” let us came here without trying to stop us, I guess they are tired to be under the rules of a tyrant.”
“No, you are lying! I will kill you little piece of sh-” But the Emperor never could finish his phrase, as five bolts were now stuck in his body and killing him instantly.
“Commander, what do you think he was talking about when he said he had killed our leader?” Asked one of the Changeling who had shout on the Emperor.
“I don’t know soldier...But I think we should return to our base and wait for the return of our Queen. I don’t want any of you report his last words to her majesty, not until we get more information on it. Do I make myself clear?” Answered FIllia by which every changeling present answered by the affirmative.
“Now let’s leave this cursed place.”
***
“STOOOOOOP!!!!!” Yelled Twilight as she enter in the throne room, interrupting Celestia. The whole throne room whispered between each other as they were wondering why the little sister of Shining Armor was interrupting his weddings.
“Why do she have to be so possessive of her brother?” Said the false Cadence until she realise that she said it out loud, she quickly tried to return in Cadence character by faking some tears and asking why Twilight was trying to ruin her special day, which in a certain point of view was true.
“Because it not your special day! It mine!” Answered a weak and injured Cadence. Everypony present in the throne room was now confused as to why there was two Cadence.
“I don’t understand, How could they be two of them?” Asked Applejack.
“Because she a Changeling, she can take the form of anypony you love and feed on this love to get become more strong! She had made me and Twilight imprisoned so we could not reveal her plan and used to control of Shining armor to get more power and used Onyx to cover her and help her in her plan.”
At those words, Chrysalis knew that she could no longer hide herself and so chose to return to her original form, A huge blast of green fire exploded around her, revealing herself to everyone in the throne. As she expected many of the noble present got scared from her appearance but she did not mind since they will soon be all food for her subject.
“Right you are princess. And as Queen of the Changeling it is up to me to find food for my subject.” Walking down the stairs of the hotels, she rejoined Cadence in the middle of the throne rooms. “Equestria have more love than any place That I have ever encounter. My fellow changeling will be able to devour so much of it that we’ll be able to have more power than we ever dreamed of!”
“They never get the chance! Shining Armor shield will keep them away from the city!”
Chrysalis evilly laughed before crushing every hope of defence from the princess of love. “I doubt that, I have complete control over Shining Armor that I can order to him destroy the shield at any time.”
Cadence who did not want to let Queen do as she pleased, tried to charge her but quickly stopped when Chrysalis pointed Shining Armor.
“Ha ha ha, I don’t you want anything to happen to your husband because if you make any other move in my direction I will have to order my new pet to take care of him.”
At those words, Onyx who was hiding in the shadow of the room, placed himself behind Shining Armor. He was wearing the white and black leather armors he had received from of the captain of the night guard and he was holding is dual sword in his right hand, menacing to cut the throat of Shining with one of the blades.
“Soon my Changelings army will break through, first we will take Canterlot and then all of Equestria.”
“No! you won’t!” Exclaimed Celestia. “You might have thought that menacing Shining Armor would keep princess Cadance to fight you, but it will not keep me from defending my Kingdom! Shining Armor knew the danger of his jobs as a soldier and death is one of it. Not only are you meaning my subject but you had used my son to do so and for this I shall show no mercy!”
And with those words, Celestia fly up in the room before shooting a deadly stream of magic to Changeling Queen, which she swiftly answered by casting one of her spells directly to the one Celestia was casting. Neither Chrysalis or Celestia could have knew what the choc of the spells would do when they would met each other but when they do, a huge explosion broke out from the choc of the spells, sending everypony in the throne room flying all over the place.
***
Onyx had some difficulty to move his body and he could not see more far than his nose with all the dust around him. Onyx did not know why but after some time, while he has been trapped in his own body, he have been able to see and hear what “he” was doing, so he knew that his body have been projected out of the throne room when the explosion hitted him, but the real question he was asking himself is why now was he back in control? Did the Queen had caught killed by the explosion in which case the spell he was under had stopped or was he because of something else. The only thing he was sure of is that one of his leg was hurting a lot and that he needed to find out if his mother was alright.
When the dust finally fall off, he could see that he was no longer in the throne room, but instead he was on one of the bridge that connected the easter tower to the central tower where the throne room was.
RIsing up from the ground, Onyx took his sword who luckily had fallen just behind him and made slowly his way to the the other side of the bridge but while he was walking, a shot of green magic pass two inches in front of his face. Curious from where it could have came from, Onyx took a look under the bridge but what he saw made him want to throw up.
Ponies, Changeling and guard were fighting each other all over the city, the ground of Canterlot were filled with death body drowning in pools of bloods. The Changeling were either fighting guards who were easily outnumbered and putting down by the sharp spears and sword of the ennemie or they were eating the energy out of the civilian who were found by them.
A huge anger took birth in onyx mind, he was the prince of Equestria, the son of the current leader and soon to be the next one and that Queen of CHangeling had attacked his city and killed the civilian he should had taken care of. Holding his dual-sword more tightly, it with a renewed strength that Onyx run toward the throne room to put an end to Changelings invasion.
***
After explosion, everyone who had survived it had fled the throne room minus Celestia, Cadence and the Elements of Harmony. Chrysalis had made Shining dispel his shields before throwing away not that she had no use for him. Cadence had tried to help her husband but Chrysalis overpowered her easily and took care of the love princess who was now collapsed on the ground. Celestia and The Element had tried to stop CHrysalis and they fought with all their strength but Chrysalis was now too strong for them and only Twilight and Celestia was left, only because Chrysalis wanted it, she wanted to see Celestia suffer and cry for her to put an end to her life and she wanted to do the same for Twilight since she was the one who kept trying to ruin her invasion.
“It seem like I have won Princess….” Started Chrysalis, shooting a bolt of energy to Celestia who yelled in pain. “I will make you regret what you had done to my mother and I will take pleasure in doing so.” She casted a second bolt on Celestia and on Twilight this time.
“I-I don’t know wh-what you talking about.” Said weakly Celestia.
“Don’t act like you don’t know. It will only make thing worse for the student of yours.” As she shot another bolt to Twilight.
“I...swear, I truly don’t...Please...Have mercy and let’s my student go. Sh-she is too young to suffer like that..” plaided Celestia.
“Like If I care. I have won and both of you are under my total control, no one can save you and I will take my time torturing both of you.” Chrysalis was preparing another spell to shot on them but she was interrupted by a small rock which hit her back the head.
“I think you have forgotten something! And that something is me!” EXclaimed Onyx, pointing his sword toward CHrysalis, ready to put an end to this madness. “You have attacked the citizen of my city, ruined the marriage of my favorite cousin and hurted my family. and for this, me Prince Onyx, Son of Celestia and protector of Equestria ask you to leave with your army right now or to face the consequence!”
Chrysalis looked at the prince before bursting in laughter. “Do you really think that you could stop me, the changeling Queen who defeated Celestia and The element of harmony all alone and you think you have the power to defeat me?” Don’t make me laugh you are not in a book where the good guy always won at the end. This is the real life young prince….But you entertain me so It my turn to give an offer.” The Queen walked to the throne and sat on it. “You amuse me Onyx, so why not join me and be my pet, I promise you I will not be as cruel than the Emperor and if you want I could let that purple friend of your join you. Drop this weapon and come sit next to me.”
Onyx did not need to even think about it, never he would accept an offer like that from the Changeling Queen and so he took a fighting position, readying himself for the upcoming fight.
“...As you wish Onyx, but know something before you try to pierce me with that sword. If you try to kill me you are the one who will die.” Said the Queen In a calm tone.
“Onyx...Runaway my son- don’t stay here or she will kill you.” SAid Celestia, more weak than ever. “You have no chance against her and I don’t want you to sacrifice yourself for me….”
Onyx took a deep breath before he look his injured mother in her eyes. “I will not lose mom, you had took care of me your whole life. Now is my turn to take care of you.” And with those words Onyx charged the Changeling Queen, He tried to slice her while she was on the throne but she simply teleported herself behind him.
“Nope, I’m over here.”
Onyx knew that she would probably do this and so he quickly give a thrust with the second blade of the sword behind him but the Queen dodged the hit.
“Hooo Nice shot, It seem you have started to masterise my gift.”
Ignoring the comment, Onyx returned himself and keep tried to strike the queen but Chrysalis was dodging every one of his move.
“You are too slow.” “Better luck next time.” Nope, it just the air.” Chrysalis was mocking him each time he was missing her, she was playing with him and he know it very well.
“I’m getting tired from all this….I’ will ask one more time. After it will be too late. Will you become my pet Onyx?” Asked Chrysalis, clearly tired of this little cat and mouse game.
“Never.” Said Onyx. “Now it the time.” He taught. Onyx want to take advantage of the lake of care from the queen to throw his sword at her. The dual blades flew across the room before passing through Chrysalis body.
“YEs I got you.!” Exclaimed the prince, but to his surprise to Queen simply keep moving around him.
“Tu-tu-tu, It seem like you have sealed your fate yourself….Let me explain you a little something. before you die. This sword have been made by my kingdom and I personally out a spell of my own creation on it...Do you want to know what is it? Of course you do...Well that sword can’t hurt a member of my species and every “dommage” you would do to a changeling will be dealt to you instead.”
And with those words, a sharp pain shot through Onyx stomach as blood started to pour out of his clothes and mouth, the prince falled on his knee, his eyes filled with terror at the sudden realisation of what was happening. “I’m...sorry...mom.” Where the last word he said before collapsing on the floor.
“I won.” Said the queen.
“Noooooooooooo! Yelled Twilight, terrorized by the fact that Onyx was dying in front of her and she could do anything. The purple Unicorn slowly rose up from the ground, charging as much magic as she could in her horn. Chrysalis let he do so. SHe knew that Twilight too weak to do anything, that the “power of friendship” Was useless since she had no element of harmony with her but when an explosion of white light came from behind her, she only had the time to see Twilight being illumined by magic, her eyes were plain white and she floating in the air and then befor Chrysalis could do anything. Twilight casted a shockwave spell that sent her and all of army fly away who know where.
When she spell stopped, Twilight Collapsed on the ground from having using a such big amount of magic.
***
The next morning was a sad day for the Equestrian Kingdom, a huge crowd of pony was waiting in front of the castle gates, the terrifying news had reached the four corner of Equestria and everypony who were able to do the travels had come to Canterlot to paid their respect to the defunct prince. While the majority of the populace were waiting outside, the family and the closest friends of Onyx were all gathered around a coffins in the royal garden. They had digged up a hole at the exact same place where Celestia had found Onyx when he was a baby and now they were all waiting for Luna to give her speech. Celestia was not able to take the strength necessary to talk so she let’s her sister do it in her place, Twilight and her friends where all silently crying at the side of the coffins. a little more behind was Fleur de Lis and Fancy Pants, they were not crying like the other but the look on their face said it all.
“We are gathered here today to remember the good moment we had with our defund friends, son and prince. We must remember the lesson that Onyx has all teached us and at our turn teach them to the future generation.” Started Luna, her voice shaking from the emotion. “ Even if he was physically different from us, Onyx showed us that his souls was the one of a pony just like us. He had lived his life trying to help the other less fortunates.” Luna took a break and looked at the small group in front of her before taking back her courage and keep going on. “ I will always remember the good moment I had passed with him, Onyx had his flaws but overall he was a good boy and never will I forget his kindness.”
Celestia could no longer support it and she fall on the coffin, crying loudly while whispering the name of her dead son. Luna choose to not continue her speech for respect for her sister, she simply take of a feather from one of her wings and depose it on the coffin before disappearing in a flash of magic to somewhere she would be able to let her emotion out without other pony to see her.
Everypony in the garden came to coffin one by one, deposing something special on it before returning to their home, only Celestia and Twilight were left in the garden.
“He-he loved you Twilight you know…” Said Celestia between her sobs. “He loved you more than anything. E-Even after you had breakup with him, he still hoped for you two to return to-together…”
Twilight did not respond, she already knew that Onyx was still loving her, she had wanted to ask him out on a date after the wedding but now it was too late. Never will she saw him again, she will never felt again the comfort of having him enlace her between his arms or feel the burning passion of kissing him.
Celestia and her student kept crying until the gravedigger came, it took a moment for Celestia to leave the coffins alone but when Twilight pulled her away, telling her that it was time for them to say their final goodbye before they bury Onyx, she nodded slowly and looked one last time to where her dead son was laid.
“Onyx, I don’t know if you can hear me...but if you do I want to tell you that you have been the most beautiful thing to happen in my life. I don’t know how could have I lived without you and I’m glad that I had the opportunity to raise you. No mother could which for a more perfect son...I0I’m sorry to not have been to pr-protect you….Sleep well my little prince….Mommy will never forget you…”
And with those last words, she and Twilight walked away from the garden, leaving the prince behind them…..
***
Prologue.
Chrysalis forced her heavy eyelids open to glare daggers across the table at her Ministers, one of them was reading her a report from the assault. He was an exceptionally strong and proud changeling with a large,scars crossing all over his face. He sat cross-legged to her left at the short table where the entirety of the cabinet also sat, all cross-legged and dressed in purple armor decorated with the many ribbons that showed each of their distinction. Chrysalis herself sat at the far end of table, as was custom, with the Prime Minister to her right.
“I’m awake,” she growled, pinching her sinuses. “Continue.”
“Yes, well,” he cleared his throat and proceeded to read from his documents. “The official reports have come back.” His face was grim, as if he supported the entire weight of the kingdom upon his shoulders and his hooves would give out at any moment. “Officially, a total of 138,000 changelings have not been reseen since the explosion. That is easily a little below the half of the army we had send. Out of that number, the majority have got killed by the explosion but there still a few that we have not recover their body yet….” He trailed off uncertainly when the Queen raised her hoof.
“Minister, are you going to to keep this up for a long time again? We all know that we have lost many of our companion but what I want to know is how many of them have been caught by the ponies? Unless you don’t know the answer, in which case I have no use of you.” The Minister did not know how to respond. His worried eyes glanced towards his fellow ministers for assistance, who either just shrugged or kept out of eye contact.
“Well?” Her voice grew impatient.
Eventually, all the Minister could do was shrug and stutter, “W-well…I can’t say anything on it, Your Majesty. We lack the data.”
Chrysalis took in a deep breath and sighed. “I’ve heard enough of this. Move on to the next item of business.”
Checking the schedule, the Prime Minister motioned to another minister further down the table, saying, “We have a report from the Ministry of Health.”
The changeling shuffled his papers and read from them, sounding proud for what he was going to reveal. “Your Majesty, after I had examined the result of our test on you, I have the great pleasure to announce you that everything as worked just fine and you should expect it for the end of the current years.”
“Really, well this is for once a good new.” Exclaimed the Changeling Queen.
“But what is he talking about?” Asked the minister of war. “What is that good new?”
“Hum..Maybe I should explain it to all of you now that I know it has worked…”
The whole table fell silent, eager to know what their queen was so happy about.
“As you may all already know, when it come to conceive our children, our body can adapt to any “receiver.” Whatever they are a pony, gryphon or minotaure we can conceive a children with any of those race and the children will came out as a Changeling.” Started the queen, now walking around the table.
“Now when I started to prepare our invasion, the minister of health came to me and presented to me a second plan in case the first of was a failure, which it has been the case. The plan was that I conceive a children with the a member of the Equestrian’s royal family so my children will have every right to obtain the throne and by the same case give us control over Equestria.”
“As brilliant this plan make sound, every member of the royal family are female…” Started the War minister but Chrysalis rapidly interrupted him.
“No, not all of them, you seem to forget the adoptive son of Celestia and even if his species was way more different from what we are used to see, the health minister just confirmed me that I am now pregnant from the prince of Equestria.”
Every minister in the room were surprised by this new. Never would have they taught that their Queen had prepared a plan like this..
“So...you and him had mated...but when and why did he accepted to had a relation with you?” Asked the war minister.
“I never said I had asked the permission first. I made him do it once I had taken control over his body.” Replied back Chrysalis. “Now we only had to wait for my future child to be in age to rules and Equestria will be ours…”
***
“Where am I?” Asked himself the young adult as he was lying on the ground, engrossed by the tune of the birds who were in the tree in the nearby forest. He tried to rose up from his position but a sharp pain shot through his stomach. The young adult tried to remember why is body was hurting him so much and why was he in this grassland alone.
But while the young man was lost in his thought, the sound of a motor approaching to his left caught his attention. Turning his head, he tried to check on what was the cause of that sound but his vision started to become blurry and the only thing he could saw was someone stepping out of a tractor.
“Mister! Can I ask you what are you doing in my property?” Asked aggressively the woman until she saw the red liquid pouring out of the man body. “Oh my God! You are bleeding!” Exclaimed the lady as she rushed to the injured man while taking out her cellphone and calling an ambulance.
“Mister can you hear me? Who did you this?” She asked, hoping that engaging a conversation with him will keep him awake long enough for the ambulance to arrive.
“I-I don’t know….” He answered weakly.
“And what is your name.” She asked while she tried to stop the flood of blood with her hands.
“I-I don’t remember….I-I can’t remember anything…..”
I personally think the final chapter is extremely rushed and I suggest you do a complete do over of the ending before you even think about writing sequel.
Well, my feels were crushed. Here's waiting for the seual
Also, for some reason this came into my mind when they had the funeral for Onyx.
All I have to say is that the final chapter felt rushed and the ending kinda disappointed me. I want to like the ending but I just can't. Great story overall though but the ending killed it for me.
MY EYES
It was good but...GOOD THE GRAMMAR!
Loved the story overall.
But this. Meh.
I still like it and look forward to the sequel, but it just feels rushed and doesn't carry the weight it ought to. Sorry.
When's the next due to come.
i liked the story, i agree tht it felt a little rushed, and well how onyx died, i didn't like it. it was by a cheap trick. sure it could have been done, but not i throw my sword i hit her and i die. i would have made it more heroic t.b.h.
and where was the epic fight between the griffin king and onyx? i mean he tortured the boy for 10 years and he gets killed on his throne by an arrow. onyx needed satisfaction for those 10 years. other then those complaints i look forward what you want to do with a sequel. i assume he is back in the human world
Disappointing
This battle scene with dying Onyx don't need to be here. Be much more logical if Onyx transported in human world by magic explosion and everyone gonna think he is dead.
OP Chrysalis much.
Bleh! This chapter is just... Ugh! Is English your first language? Because it doesn't seem that way.
it was not an easy read. I had to force myself through it.
GUYS i know its a little rushed
4398835 YEAH, every one is a critic, so what if there is grammar error, english is not my native lenguage either and i could understand everything perfectly, maybe u are not that good in english as you think. STOP THE CRITIC MAN, not that u can write a good HIE story, and if u can, bring it on, i ll read it.
please polish this before the sequel and do some shorts, because it was hell to read through.
DUDES STOP WHINING, GRANTED, its a little rushed i know that, but there will be confirmed sequel, take it as another chapter. MAN, YOU ALL ARE SO DRAMA QUEENS.
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............Seriously? I worked five day no stop on this chapter, I did my best to correct the grammar by myself and this how all of you react. I said I was not good in english since i'm french and I said my editor has not worked on it either. Yes the chapter will be edited now that everyone had read it but do you know how it feel to wrok his ass off, stay awake until 4 in the mourning everynight to try to bring this chapter to you as soon as I can and this how you ract
And for the one that said, where the epci fight etc... Why would there be any epic fight? Onyx is not a warrior, his fighthing skills are not that good and he does not like to fight. Sure it was a ugly death but that how thing is. And for gryphon why Onyx would have tried to do a duel with him? If htey fight each other the one who will lose is Onyx since like I said He is not a warrior.
Maybe you guy would have prefered to don't see Onyx died, Maybe you guy prefer good ending where everyone is happy, maybe you you guy prefer epic fight that we see in movie etc... But this is not of those story. This is a story about someone who shit keep hitting the fan because Onyx is very unlucky and he try to deal with it.
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....god dammit... I KNOW THE GRAMMAR IS NOT GOOD. I said it in the A/N and I said I would fix it later
REALLY not to fond of the ending, but since there's a sequel it's not that big of a deal.
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4398927
1. I really respect your work on this chapter and whole story. And I really respect you for ability to make this thing done.
2. English not my first lenguage (I'm Russian) so I don't really care about grammar.
3. I don't say that you must keep Onyx alive. If he just die this be even better for me (I don't love happy endings). But, you write in the end about human with wounds on the Earth (who's obviously Onyx), so everything what i said: if he just tranported by the blow of magic story don't really change. Even more, it be much more interesting to see how Onyx react on human world (even end in asylum maybe).
Again, thanks for your work you crazy froglover
Well, if I'm being honest, this was really kind of a major letdown. I've been following this story from the start and I really like the concept. A few things seemed a little shaky but overall this was a really great and thought out story. However there is an emphasis on "was". The entirety of the last chapter seemed rushed. And I'm not talking about the grammar so don't even start, English is my first language and even I have problems with it's BS. The events played out way too fast, the "deuse ex machina" of chrysilis having his kid didn't fit. Most of the characters seemed out of character from what you'd portrayed them thus far. And the ending seemed rather forced. Over all this chapter really was quite a disappointment, feeling like it lacked any substance behind it at all; and as such in comparison to your earlier work as much as I feel like an *** for saying it the last chapter just feels like a perfect example of bad writing...
4398893
4398927 woah woah woah now. First of all, I want to apologize for not leaving any positive note in my last comment. I was just really frustrated with the grammar. Like I said before, it was hard to read, but I DID read it when I would usually just skip it. The reason why is because I frickin' LOVE this story! Unlike most people, I loved how you ended this. The hanging suspence is a great lead into a sequel. Oh, and I WILL read the sequel.
All I have to say is, don't be discouraged by my last comment and keep writing.
Just PLEASE get an editor.
4398927 I had no desire for any epic duel where every character somehow survives and any and all problems are swept under the rug. I just felt a few overarching plot elements were left unresolved, like the story had a few more chapters in it before the finale. It's still a good story and remains a favourite 'Momlestia' type story and I look forward to the sequel.
And just for the record, I thought your grammar was fine. Certainly better than some of the early chapters in my story before I had it revised.
4399047 OK.... thanks but im not the creator of this story.
4399117 oh.... I must be going crazy.
I swear I did not realize i replied to you. I thought I was only responding to Silver fang.
...
I should probably go take my medicine now.
Great story, but kinda sad as well seeing Onyx death, but he got second chance in life, and hope I'll be looking forward for sequel.
Good content, bad presentation.
A lot of plurals were made singular, a lot of spelling mistakes, capitalizations, and some missing words entirely.
Why did you rush this? If only you got someone to review it (an editor) this would have been excellent.
Love that chrysalis actually had an EVIL back up plan
Very interesting ending, can't say I didn't see it coming, the death part I mean. the fact the Chrysalis was pregnant caught me by surprise, I hope the sequel will be as good or even better then this.
Firstly, I must admit to not reading this story in detail, I tried because the premise amused me, but I was immediately turned away at the horrible grammar, characterization, and plot line. Now, I was given a link to this chapter, as a friend of mine has quite often shown a dislike for this story. Rather than allow him to paint my view, I have decided to read this chapter, in the hopes of it being improved from what I had read before.
I was sorely disappointed. If anything, the grammar seems worse, I can't comment on how the story has gotten to this point, since I haven't read the majority, but it seems like you were trying to wrap up this story quickly, and inadequately, for this sequel you speak of. Now, I shall speak more on the grammar since it is all I can really do, taking in to account that you had no editor through fault of your own, you still should not have as many errors. I am brought to remember a bit near the very beginning of this chapter in which it is speaking of dear Cadance, not only is a quotation mark randomly placed before her name, but an asterisk is also placed following it. That is not proper.
There is also the matter of tenses, plurals, and singulars, you seem to have trouble with these, I note again a bit from your story, in the very beginning no less, wherein Chrysallis is sitting in a chair you write how she 'put one of her hoof under her chin,' where it should be, 'she put one of her hooves under her chin,' see the difference? It's little things like that which can be found all throughout the story that make me unable to enjoy it, other than the terrible characterization and plot line, of course.
There is also the simple matter of the broken speech, or description, or narration, whatever you like to call it, that is present not only in your story, but also in the author's notes. Come on man, is it really that hard? I don't think it is, it seems many of these problems could have been solved by just reading of what you had written, but I suppose that didn't occur to you? Oh well, it would have helped.
On the matter of you asking forgiveness for the shit quality, because you didn't want to ruin the surprise for you editor, that is not a valid excuse. Editors are there so that they may touch up the corners of a story, so that it can be released as anything better than shit, understand? Anyway, now that this chapter has been released, why don't you go back, with a friend or two, and re-write the whole story? No, don't rush, I'll wait, take your time.
Sequel?
You had my curiosity, but now you have my attention. Great Story, by the way.
Uck, heres some advice- NEVER release a chapter this big without running it by an editor first. It won't be ruining the suprise for them, they'll just be reading it ahead of time compared to the others. There are SO many mistakes that I can barely stand to read it, the ending you can EASILY see coming when you think about the fact that you've been spouting off that this would be the final chapter, and even the twists are predictable. Really an extremely Meh final chapter, one that kinda sickens me to see on a story as interesting as this one was.
out of
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so he back on earth now man when think you catch life shit on people but I looking forward to it
Good lord the grammar and spelling in this is chapter atrocious, did you even edit this at all? I had to stop reading half way through to type this comment, a simple spell and grammar check would fix half these errors, and a read through would fix the rest.
Edit: I have finished the chapter and it seems really rushed, I recommend splitting this chapter into two or more pieces fleshing them out and taking more time with each section rather than cramming it in to this one messy chapter.
WHAAAAT!?!?!? I binge-read this story today for this!?!? Not only was this chapter rushed beyond belief and the story having serious grammar issues, this had the chance to be a great story. But by having him get sent back with no memory was a slap in the face. I would've rather him had a goodbye on his deathbed or have him survive but weakened. Why is it he couldn't at least live his life in Equestria and die with a few foals of his own?
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Thank God I don't have to type that out now... But, I have to agree with you.
To the author: this story has a nice premise, but the execution of it was not the best. Always assume the people you're writin to are idiots on the subject, and you have to spell it out for them. Work on your grammar more. And honestly your characters a re much too stereotypical. The evil guy is was to bad, and Prince Onyx is way to good. They need some grey.
How Does That Ending Give Way For A Sequel!?
Onyx Is Dead In The Ponyverse And Can't Remember Anything In The Humanverse!! You Can't Have ToPO Without Prince Onyx!
So......many.....grammatical errors.......AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
At lest that griffon got what was coming to him.
4400828 lol your the only commenter that i saw that didnt comment about the grammer or how the chapter was rushed
i dont like this ending im not saying redo it or anything but im just saying it could have been better with him winning in my opinion
4400512 Unless it's retrograde amnesia he's suffering from. The brain is a weird organ.
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On the contrary, I felt Onyx dying was somewhat fitting. I mean, the story is called "Tales of Prince Onyx". So, naturally, the legend would end with his death. And also, how would you know if him surviving would be any better? What, would you also have proffered it to be exactly the plot of the show with Onyx being a side story?
Not only is THAT lazy but it would also be a cop-out with a cheap story ending that's all sunshine and rainbows. I like the risk 4398927 put in. And now that the author introduced new things that are honestly interesting? It can be an actual continuation with an introduction of a new "The tales of-". Maybe centering around a new character so their story could be told? Who knows?
If it ended all hunky-dory and a sequel was announced, it would probably end up as a "Daily Life" fic that just goes nowhere and eventually gets abandoned. Either way, I'm looking forward to where the direction of the story will go.
I can't do it
-Big Joe
well neither can I. I can't finish when it obviously has never been proof-read, hell I doubt you even put it through a good spell checking. Fix it put it back and maybe I'll read it and the next one.
Bad Grammar Makes Fluttershy CRY
Okay just summarizing what just happened:
1: Chryssie made Onyx her pet.
2: The preparations for the wedding are being made.
3: Griffon is assassinated by the Changelings (finally ).
4: Chryssie takes out Twilight and Celestia herself.
5: Chryssie kills Onyx with the weapon she gave him and then gets blasted away by Twilight's Fus Ro Dah.
6: They have a funeral for Onyx, tears were being made.
7: Chrysalis reveals that she did the dirty deed with Onyx, making her pregnant for a plan B.
8: Then we find out he went back to the human world badly injured.
Thats a pretty interesting way to end this story. A good job I have to say. Mustaches for you good sir
4401777 Indeed.
4402512 i can see how that would happen i just didnt like how he died and i guess also because he didnt have twilight in the end
DUDES, STOP COMMENTING LIKE IS THE END OF THE STORY AND PUTTING BAD CRITIC. HE SAID HE WILL MAKE A SEQUEL SO THIS IS LIKE AN END OF A SEASON. DONT MAKE HIM ANGRY TO NOT WRITE THE SEQUEL. I WANT THE SEQUEL.
BY THE WAY I THINK THE ENDING IS AWESOME
You know, you really should have let your editors go through it. It's barely comprehensible. The actual story were alright, but the need to reread countless lines took away from the experience. Also, the resolution was... disappointing. You build up Onyx, and then have Twilight save the day? That ending basically made Onyx's existence pointless. He didn't do anything of importance in the entire story, except make trouble for Celestia and everyone else. That was his time to shine, and you took it from him. I'm sorry, I loved this story, and I look forward to the sequel, but this ending... It's the season 3 finale all over again. Let's hope you can pull off your own "season 4" redemption.
Now, what I LOVED about this, is that sequel set up. I've never seen a story where a human raised in Equestria is sent to earth. Although, Chrysalis is an idiot. Does she not realize she has to prove it's Onyx's? Also, everyone will know she raped him which makes the child ineligible to take the throne.
Sorry if I sound a bit harsh, but it's how I feel, and judging by the comments, I'm not alone. Honestly, I'd recommend rewriting the ending. Give Onyx his moment back.
4400828 yeah, quite unexpectedly, but at last