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gmen15

Joined April 2012
474 followers

Stories (39)

Blog Posts (294)

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Because people seem to enjoy ponies with food so much, I decided to take a shot at it.

Title is pretty self-explanatory.

Twilight, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash go to one of the local fast-food places to order some lunch, but when it's Fluttershy's turn to order, she panics.

Slightly based on something I did when ordering Asian food at the mall. Yes, socializing isn't the easiest thing for me.

Idea Inspired By: Art Inspired and his story Fluttershy Discovers Animal Crackers

First Published
29th Sep 2012
Last Modified
29th Sep 2012

Comments ( 31 )

#1 · 100w, 22h ago · · ·

Well, here's another short little one-shot comedy. I hope you enjoy.

Also, I apologize that Twilight's OCD is a bit exaggerated. I thought it'd be somewhat funny at the end, but if it isn't, please don't hesitate to let me know. :twilightsmile:

#2 · 100w, 17h ago · · ·

I laughed so hard at the "Marry me" line. Nice job! :pinkiehappy:

#3 · 100w, 17h ago · · ·

Lo, I do this all the time.

#4 · 100w, 17h ago · · 1 ·

Yeah, that's originality. Take my fic, and Topsy Turn it into... this. Nice:ajbemused: For those who don't know what I'm talking about,

Go here

I'll read this later, and see how similar it is. My liking is withdrawn, as I never judge a book by its cover.

#5 · 100w, 16h ago · · ·

Nice story. Exagerated, but I think that was the point.

Two mistakes leap out: you wrote 'upmost' when you meant 'utmost'. You also used 'pontificate' when you meant... Well something else. Pontificate doesn't mean anything like what I think you think it means.

#6 · 100w, 16h ago · · ·

>>1356164 You must be paranoid. I've never read either story (not yet), and I can tell you that the fact that they involve Fluttershy and food doesn't necessarily mean they're the same thing. They look vastly different.

#7 · 100w, 16h ago · · ·

I loved it. But there are a few bits where you've missed out words or got them in the wrong order. It was quite a few times so I won't point them all out, I'd recommend going through and editing though. Other than that, each pony was in character, it was a fun idea, and I really enjoyed it. Keep up the good work!

#9 · 100w, 16h ago · · ·

Stories like these that put me in a good ood and laugh my arse off always are a favorite in my book. ^_^

True ending: Twiight gets sent to the moon for blowing up ponyville and one cashier.

Bad ending: Twilight blows up the planet

Gag reel: Celestia and Luna dress up as super heroes to stop the insane Twilight, only to get beaten by Batman l.

Oh celestia my brain hurts from the insanity of making something like that:pinkiecrazy:

#10 · 100w, 16h ago · · ·

>>1356164

I just read your fic... what the heck are you talking about? The two stories are completely different! They're both good fics in my opinion, but I don't think you should accuse an author of taking "your" idea and changing it, JUST because Fluttershy and food happen to be in both of them. Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think you ARE being paranoid here and it happens to the best of us so don't feel bad. Just know that there are thousands of stories on this site, and that there are bound to be one's that are similar to each other, even if these two in, my opinion, are not.

#11 · 100w, 16h ago · · ·

>>1356217>>1356295>>1356316 Whoa, whoa, whoa ponies... Look, I told you I'd read this later! You can't blame me for making that comment! I don't know if I like it yet. Don't thrash on me for seeing the title and being like this sounds very familiar... hmm. Not trolling here! Let me read the dang fiction and come to my conclusion for sweet Celestia's sake.:facehoof:

#12 · 100w, 15h ago · · ·

>>1356455 I'm not blaming you for the suspicion, but for the accusation. You didn't have to say anything, and even if saying something you didn't have to be so condescending about it. In short, I want you to read the dang fiction and come to your conclusion. The problem is that you did the latter before the former.

A simple mistake and I don't blame you for it. I just suggest, for your sake, that you don't let it happen again.

#13 · 100w, 15h ago · · ·

>>1356455

Hey man, look it's cool. I understand your concerns. I can imagine how frustrating it would be having my work ripped off by somepony on this site.

I didn't intend to do any of that and I apologize if that's the vibe you got from initially looking at my story. But I can assure you, I had no intentions of copying anyone else's story, but I do understand why you'd worry.

#14 · 100w, 15h ago · · ·

>>1356541 It's okay... I was being paranoid... sorry.:ajsleepy:

#15 · 100w, 15h ago · · ·

Reading this reminds me of that one time in family guy where Peter can't decide between the soup or the salad XD

Good story :D

#16 · 100w, 15h ago · · ·

>>1356553

No worries man, it's all good. :twilightsmile:

#17 · 100w, 15h ago · · ·

I think my favorite line was "It was like an exaggeration of her character flaws." Hang a little lampshade, then any characterization problems get to be passed off as a joke.

#18 · 100w, 13h ago · · ·

I just know that saying something like "I'll tell Princess Celestia on you, Twilight" will snap her out of her antics. Everything Twilight was being right now reminded me of this guy.

#19 · 100w, 13h ago · · ·

I liked this. I love that cashier and can really relate with Fluttershy on this one. Good job!:yay:

#20 · 100w, 11h ago · · ·

Uber OCD Twilight! :rainbowwild:

The sad thing is it reminds me of me when I was younger...

for example, I refused to eat burgers if the bun had sesame seeds on it until, like, junior high :twilightblush:

#21 · 100w, 5h ago · · ·

LOL :rainbowlaugh: i couldnt stop laughing. great piece.:twilightsmile:

#22 · 99w, 6d ago · · ·

Characters exagerated...but good humor.

#23 · 98w, 5d ago · · ·

Awww, poor Fluttershy! I'm like that with ordering, too, half the time when I go out to eat with people, I just say that I'll have whatever my friend is having! :twilightblush:

Twilight on the other hoof, oh my goodness! I feel so bad for the cashier! :applecry:

#24 · 98w, 5d ago · · ·

>>1404305

Yeah actually that's a big reason why I like writing stories about Fluttershy so much, because I have so many of her mannerisms. With close friends I'm more outgoing, to the point where I say random things and don't make sense. But with strangers I'm much more reserved and always worry about what others think of me.

So, in a way, I'd say I'm an odd combination of :pinkiehappy: and :fluttershysad:

#25 · 98w, 5d ago · · ·

>>1404584

That's rather awesome. I'm like a combination of :yay: and :twilightsmile: except not really Twilight in this story, thank goodness. Fluttershy stories are awesome, though. I now want to see an episode where she orders a sandwich. :rainbowkiss:

#26 · 98w, 2d ago · · ·

I got a good laugh, you get a gold star for a worthy short

#27 · 97w, 3d ago · · ·

Poor Fluttershy, I do this exact thing every time I try and order food or buy something.

Reading this, I could feel the eyes. :fluttershyouch:

#28 · 95w, 4d ago · · ·

Man this story makes me want to go to Panera or I could make my own sandwich with hummus.

#29 · 95w, 4d ago · 1 · ·

I know a lot of people are saying this, but I feel a lot like Fluttershy when it comes to ordering food. I'm too scared about my order being taken wrong, I get nervous and panicky, which (from an outsider's view) only makes things worse.

Also, the OCD Twilight in this was funny :twilightsmile:

#30 · 78w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

The cashier made this story for me. Pure, epic, win. :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

#31 · 76w, 4d ago · · ·

>>1356541>>1356536 this right here...

this is why I love this fandom:pinkiesad2::yay::pinkiehappy:

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