A Variant Season
Bleak Season
"...and that's why it's called a 'Sousaphone'. Technically it is a 'tuba', but that's like sayin' a stepladder is a ladder - right but not all that's there to be said."
"Huh, interesting." The purple pony contemplated the oddity of their conversation and decided it wasn't any stranger than the rest of the day.
Rarity leaned toward the white alicorn to whisper, "so, you're certain this isn't one of the ancient plagues?"
Celestia chuckled, "No Rarity, I don't remember seeing a 'Parasprite' before. Do be sure Miss Pie sends whatever notes she may have so they can be cataloged in the archives." She watched one of the jewel tone insects hop by, "so pretty to be so dangerous."
"Watch them reproduce and you'll be cured of that." Rarity muttered darkly. 'Positively disgusting.'
The stream became a trickle and finally ended, Fluttershy glanced up to see a pegasus from the weather team give an 'all clear' sign. "I think that was the last of them."
Carefully putting the cymbals away, Rainbow Dash glanced at the eighth member of the group standing outside the Everfree, "So, Lu-ah, Pri-guh, um 'Midnite'. It was cool hanging out with you. You think this'll happen again sometime?"
"It has certainly been an education. We-I am grateful to you all for your hospitality, as always."
Rarity couldn't resist, "So, Princess, I take it you are eager to spend time with your 'ward'?"
The princess smiled indulgently, "I do think we deserve some time together, it has been a very, very long time." There was that thousand year stare again.
The royal carriage departed with remarkably little fanfare, everypony feeling spent from the stress of the day. Six friends said their goodbyes and headed to their respective homes.
Doccumentation, Observations on Changelings, Informal Interview 1
Subject will be referred to as 'M' for the purposes of these transcripts.
Interviewer will be referred to as 'Q' (for questioner) for similar purposes.
Q: What exactly does a Changeling need to feed on to survive?
M: We primarily subsist on sympathetic energies, what you call emotions.
Q: Primarily?
M: Yeah, we do need some food and water. Why do you think we have mouths?
[Noted for further study: parallel bio-morphic features]
Q: What source do you obtain this 'sympathetic energy' from?
M: You're really going to make me say it? From ponies. Mostly. We can feed on other sentient creatures, but most of them don't provide nearly the same concentration. Speaking of which your [rest of answer redacted]
Q: Please remain on topic.
M: Sorry. I forget how nervous you ponies are about family. I didn't mean to upset-
Q: It's fine, let us return to the questions. This first session will be short.
Q: What effects, if any, have you noticed on ponies, or other sentients, when a Changeling 'feeds' on them?
M: Well, uh... I don't really like to focus on that.
Q: Please, you must have had some observations.
M: Well, first they get slightly distracted. They... lose a little focus, and then they feel a little tired. The second... stage? Well, next they seem ...emotionally flat if feeding continues for longer than about fifteen minutes. That's really approximate, and I think it depends on the pony and the intensity of feeding. I, um, I don't go any further than that...
Q: Please rest assured that you will not be judged too harshly for anything you admit as part of this interview, but for that reason you need to be as honest as you can. Have you ever taken a feeding further than that?
M: ... ...once. It, it was just after the Brothers found me, I was... young? We don't ... I don't think Changelings age the same way ponies do. I mean, I know that we can die of old age and I'm pretty sure we go through stages, so that's like aging but-
Q: This must be very hard for you, but please, the question.
M: ... so I was just starting to be aware of myself as... a ... what, separate individual? Anyway, after one of their performances - I was still being... trained for the act at this time - they forgot to lock me in, and I got out. I wandered off, now I realize how really lucky I was nopony saw me - not that they'd've known what I was, but just... well, you know. So I see this little kid sort of looking around, and ... I forget what made me think copying the kid was a good idea but that's what I did. All of a sudden I feel this stream of energy wafting over the area, kind of far away but I can tell it's pretty intense. I'm hungry, so I follow it. ... I'm going to summarize instead of re-living it, if you don't mind.
Q: That is fine.
M: So, the mother sees me, her child, she's relieved and takes me home. I'm just eating up all the energies, relief, anger-some at her child but mostly at herself, joy, love, and some other muddled stuff you don't really have words for. It was the richest feast I'd ever experienced. I... you, please, you've got to understand I had no idea what my impersonating the child would mean. You wouldn't look like that if I was a pony and told you I stole a pie! It's not like the Guard didn't find the kid and get her home eventually... I can't do this...
[interview suspended]
"I can't believe we're even sitting here debating this! She's... she's," 'One of us, but I can't say that and not imply we could do this to any other pony-and that wouldn't be right either.' Twilight was livid.
Fluttershy took in a deep breath before replying, "We didn't ask Nightmare Moon before we tried to help her. Are you saying that Rainbow doesn't deserve as much help as we give our enemies?"
"Oh no, don't. Don't you dare... this is not the same."
"There's a difference between being generous, being self sacrificing, and punishing one's self.", Rarity sounded confident, but wasn't meeting her eyes.
"Sure, and there's a difference between intervention and conspiracy. You..." 'No, don't go there.' She sighed. Rarity seemed quite happy to leave the subject alone, judging by her flinch.
"She needs help, I'll do whatever needs to be done. If there is a price, if there is blame for this, I'll take it."
"Why should you shoulder that burden Fluttershy? Besides," Rarity glanced at Twilight, "everypony already knows who would plan something like this." No, she wasn't happy, she was resigned.
Jackie looked back and forth, feeling trapped. "All Ah kin say is ah've never seen somepony lose at horseshoes like that before. When I brought up the 'Running of the Leaves' she all but fled. That ain't normal."
"When she admits there is a problem I will provide all the help I can. Until such time... I fail to see what we can do."
Fluttershy's grip on the table threatened to tip it. Rarity grit her teeth and spoke, "I think, if we could convince her that competition doesn't lead directly to others being harmed she might... Jackie, I asked you to broach the race because I thought if we could arrange for her to participate without thinking she was 'racing' as it were, she might enjoy herself. And then, if she just happened to come in at first place, why she could feel good about it without any harm. It's not a solution, but I think if might be a way to broach-"
"And what if she feels manipulated!? What if she thinks about what it would say about US that we did all this without asking her? What-"
"Oh 'what if', what if, what if! I will not stand by while my friend dies by inches!" Fluttershy stood and slammed her hooves into the table.
Twilight moved back toward the table when she realized she had backed away, reaching a tentative hoof out, "Fluttershy..."
The pegasus laughed as tears rolled, "Oh, we play this game, back and forth. 'I'm so sorry' we say, 'it's not your fault' back and feathering forth! Nothing ever changes, we both tell ourselves it's ok, and nothing ever changes. I want to break free. Oh, how I want to break Free!" The crying stopped, like a faucet had been turned off. "It's going to end, one way or another. I won't stand for this any longer." She took a few breaths, shoulders slumping. By force of will she looked Twilight in the eye again. "Alright Twilight, I wouldn't feel so defensive if I didn't already know you have a point. But what Can we do?"
"Tell her the truth." 'So simple, and yet none of us trust ourselves enough to do it.' ...Me included.' "Right now, let's just go, now before we have time to overthink it."
It was the middle of the night, but somepony was banging on the front door. Mercifully Scootaloo's room was in the back, so she hadn't been awoken. Rainbow stumbled down the stairs, groggy. 'This really better be important.' She grumbled, never even considering just trying to ignore the knock.
She found her friends, huddled around the door-she shook the sleep from her eyes and focused, "How much time do we have, what's the situation?" she quizzed them, all but pulling them inside. 'Middle of the night? This must be huge!'
They all had their heads low as they came in, 'Oh no, somepony died!?' "Gals? You're scaring me here, will somepony say something? What do you need? What can I do?" Everything she said made them feel worse, it was like a nightmare.
Eventually Twilight broke the quiet. "Rainbow Dash, we... we were talking about you behind your back."
"You woke me up, in the middle of the night, to confess to gossip?" She deadpanned, knowing there had to be more.
Flutershy spoke next, "Well, after we've had two weeks where nothing has actively tried to kill us... I've been doing some thinking, and I'm tired."
Dash bit back a sarcastic comment, 'What is this bad vibe I'm picking up, why would I even think of being mean to Fluttershy? Sure, I'm put out they woke me up but still...'
"...She's doing it again, RAINBOW!"
"Gahh! I'm here, I'm here."'Mane, Flutter can be loud when she wants to.'
"We said, we're worried about you, Rainbow Dash." Rarity sounded as tired as Dash felt.
"That's nice..." 'I, I feel like I want to kick something, what IS this!?'
"We think you're... avoid'n competition."
"Huh? Oh, sure. When I was younger I had all kinds of an ego. Almost got a friend killed over it." She eyed Fluttershy, not at all proud of the way the other pegasus flinched at that.
"But you're not a filly anymore." Twilight's eyes brimmed with water.
"Yeah, makes acting mature easier. Seriously, what gives?"
"W-we want you to be happy."
"Five best friends who're always willing to look out for me? Mission accomplished. Could use more sleep though"
"You are denying a part of yourself." 'Ok, Diane 'We pretend not to notice when you talk to yourself' Pie is worried about my mental state?'
"Ok, ok, say we indulge your little fantasy-which by your own admission you came up with without even talking to me. If we do that, what're you asking me to do, huh?"
"Admit you are afraid of competition-"
"Done, terrified of it. That was eas-"
"Admit that you're afraid of the fact that you could easily enjoy-"
"Yup, totally with you." 'Ok, starting to get upset here...'
"And admit that you miss it, that every time you step on your own ego you leave a bruise."
"Horseapples. Horse – feathering – apples. No."
Twilight looked at Rarity, who nodded at her. "We, we did more than decide you had a problem, we were going to try and coax you into a race." Rainbow barked a laugh," We had a plan, doesn't matter if it would have worked. We considered this whole conspiracy because we can see what you're doing to yourself. If another pony did what you do to yourself to a separate pony, it'd be called abuse."
"Then it's a good thing I would NEVER do that to another pony then, isnt it?"
"You're doing it to Fluttershy." Rarity said, her voice low and her head down. 'I'll take it, I'll take the blame for this.'
"No. You don't get to play that card. No. Nonononono. Get out." They all looked up, looked at her. "Did I stutter? I don't want to deal with this at all, but you bring this to my house, in the middle of the night. And then you try to whip me with that race again? No. GET. OUT."
It's pointless to wonder what would have been said next, because it was now quiet enough to hear the sound of a filly on the stairs. "Dash? What's going on?" Scootaloo wiped her eyes, trying to focus, wondering why Sweetie's and Applebloom's Sisters and their friends were here.
"Nothing Scoot, false alarm. Everypony was just leaving, head back up, I'll tuck you in."
There was really nothing to say at this point. The moment had passed.
Dear Rarity,
I apologize for the deception, this letter is not written by Cotton Candy-I am her mother, Sour Candy, and I have to ask you to stop writing to us. The payment for the therapy bills was kind of you. The payment for the back rent was worrying - I don't think she even told you about that. The two thousand word letter of recommendation to the Stylist's School was amazing, if terrifying, but you need to stop. You can't save everypony you ever wronged, and you shouldn't have to.
My daughter will always have a place in my heart, but I can tell you now she never intends to forgive you for belittling her dreams of becoming a stylist. I'm not entirely certain you were wrong at the time, and her determination to overcome your scoffing is what drove her to improve so radically. Between that and what you've done now I feel I can say you have done enough.
So please, let me thank you in my daughter's stead. Whatever wrong you did, I forgive you. For trying to make amends, and for helping my daughter reach her dreams I thank you. Now I beg you, let this go before it becomes unhealthy.
from a devoted mother,
Sour Candy
Twilight was looking over scrolls from the town records, trying to plan the logistics for the Winter Wrap Up, she prided herself on having everything set up well in advance. But she couldn't make any headway. She welcomed the distraction when somepony cleared their throat. Looking up, she saw Rainbow Dash and got to her feet hastily. "Rainbow I-"
The blue pegasus put her hoof up, "Wait, please let me go first. I want to thank you."
This was ... unexpected, "Wha?"
"Thank you for bringing your concerns to me. I know it was you who made them all come and talk to me."
"I didn't do anything to-"
"And, yeah, I'm still upset about the whole thing. But... look, there's gotta be some middle ground. I don't hurt ponies, I've organized my whole life around making sure they don't get hurt."
"Rainbow, we... we know that."
"Then why do you want me to become a selfish jerk?"
"Didn't you just say something about 'middle ground'?"
"...look, the race... I, I never told Fluttershy this-and I need you to promise me you won't tell her either."
"Ok, I promise." Rainbow seemed to see something in Twilight's sincerity that let her proceed.
"The race, it felt good, felt really good. When I saw her falling, I knew I had to stop, had to help her. But, there was one moment, one instant of time, where I was annoyed. I was Annoyed that my friend was in danger and I had to give up the race. I mean, what the hay? That's not me, I don't even think the me I was back then would have respected a pony who had a thought like that - it's like my own mind betrayed me, but it was me."
Rainbow paused to breathe, "If, if I had let that moment go on, there's no way I could have caught her. Maybe it's my imagination, but I swear I shouldn't have been able to catch her anyway. I've done the math, over and over, and the numbers just don't add up. If she fell at the start of the race, when I - when one of us knocked her off, the distance she had to have fallen, the position I was in... it makes no sense, I'd have had to be traveling well over the speed of sound to catch her, let alone get under her."
"I don't see-"
"No, I think you had to be there to understand. It WAS impossible, what I did. And it was a kind of magic, I think. And there I was, right before that, being a small, spiteful, spoiled brat. I didn't DESERVE to catch her, but I did. There's a debt there, one I'll be paying the rest of my life. Celestia's cool and all, but that moment, that's what I believe in – that the impossible can happen, that we have to make it happen... huh, I had a point, I swear I had a point, but I have no clue what it was."
"Rainbow..."
"Anyhay, thanks for listening. I'm going to be ok, give me a couple of days to sort this all out. I'll fix this, I can fix anything."
"You don't have to fix it. I'll tell them you're ok, we'll chalk this up as a mistake and never bring it up again."
"I kicked you out, out of my house. That's not ok, not at all."
"You were angry."
Rainbow stared at her for a moment. "No. See, that's why I don't do that sort of stuff. No excuses, no tolerance for intolerance. I have to fix this. Because, because what if ..." she swallowed, hard, "all this time, I thought Flutters had found some kind of inner strength. What - what if she's just been doing the same thing? It never even occurred to me. Hah, like we're still making up for the others' mistakes, I won't let anypony fall, and she always catches them if they do."
She wiped her eyes. "I just assumed she'd really made it. When I came to Ponyville and I saw her, I was so relieved. I thought to myself, well there's one pony who's never going to fall. But...what if she never stopped falling?"
"What if the moon is made of green cheese? Some things just aren't answerable."
"We could ask Luna."
"Why don't we ask Fluttershy instead?"
"When the hay did she go to the moon?"
"You know what I meant."
"Alright, alright, I'll go."
"You mean we will go."
"...you're a real good friend, you know that Twilight?"
"...well I don't agree with your reasoning, but I respect the impulse. Good luck."
"Uh, thanks, I guess. You're not half bad, for a pony." The gryphon picked up her bag and flew away.
"Hey Boss, isn't that Rainbow Dash down there?"
"Oh, it is, thank you Cloudkicker."
Fluttershy flew down, finding her two friends easily. "Listen, Dash I'm sor-"
"I'm sorry about last night."
"You don't have to apologize, you didn't do anything wrong."
"Look, I'm not really interested in rehashing this conversation. I'm sorry, you're sorry, everypony is sorry. Okay. Point is, I need to know: where do you get your strength from?"
"Huh? I'm not sure I understand the question."
"Where do you get the strength to catch everypony from? Is, is it from-"
"Oh, no. I mean, that got me thinking about it... well, eventually I thought about it, but it was the storm. I ... I had a conversation with... well it's not important, but I decided then that I was never going to run away from anything ever again. Ponies tell me they think I'm strong, and I don't bother arguing with them. It doesn't really matter, maybe I am strong. What matters is that when I have to move, I do it."
"Thank you."
"Huh, for what?"
"Thank you, for being you. For picking yourself up. It's a huge relief."
"Does, does that mean you'll try taking some pride in yourself? Seeing you always run from any kind of recognition, it's been so painful. It's like you never stopped falling... that day."
Fluttershy couldn't understand why Dash was laughing, but it beat crying by a long shot. Eventually Rainbow got control of herself back, "Ok, can we consider that darn race history now. completely?"
"I'm ready if you are."
"Deal."
"So what happens now?"
"Now? Oh, I guess I tell the others things are cool."
"That's it?"
"What else?"
"Can I make a suggestion?" The two pegasi jumped, Twilight had been quiet for so long they had forgotten she was there. "Eh, sorry. All of this, I think this is a symptom of something deeper. You remember Rarity telling us that Nightmare Moon wasn't the only threat that was going to be freed, right? I think we're all waiting for the other shoe to drop... sorry, bad metaphor." She grinned, sheepishly, "But the fact remains, all we've been doing is reacting to events. I think we need to start taking an active approach, because being so jumpy we're getting on each others' nerves."
"What did you have in mind?" Rainbow asked.
"Planning, preparation, friendship."
Doccumentation, Observations on Changelings, Informal Interview 1 (completed)
Q: Are you prepared to continue
M: Yeah. From where we left off, right
Q: If you are comfortable. What I want to know is the effect of extended 'feeding' the story isn't important.
M: ... ok. So, distraction, flatness, then comes shivers or a sense of cold, sluggishness, and loss of consciousness. That cuts off the feeding, by the way. Ponies put off emotions in their sleep, but for the most part they aren't ... available is the best term I can come up with.
Q: I see. Next question, as opposed to extended feeding, what effects are there from repeated feeding off the same subject? Long term.
M: Well, this is all just from my observations you understand, but it's like a cold. First few days it's just a lowering of general awareness, like being slightly distracted. Somewhere after that you get more tired, some ponies get irritable, or more distracted. After that you start to see real signs of decline, always tired, easier to get sick, start loosing appetite, I guess it looks like a severe case of depression. I, uh, try not to make a habit of doing that so I don't have a lot of cases to judge by.
Q: Very well, previously you mentioned different intensities of feeding.
M: Oh, right, all the stuff I just described is from what I call 'passive feeding'. If there's a connection, it's possible to pull more energy out than is being offered. It's dangerous because it's much easier to notice. But, the results are much faster and more... intense? In fact, if you're not hungry it can almost be... uh, it's like how the taste bitter has been described to me.
Q: You don't taste... huh, I'll note that for later. Noticeable, how?
M: Well, for one thing the source goes downhill pretty fast. Strength of will can slow it, even if it's only subconscious resistance-it's really hard to feed when there's not already a connection established, at least on your own.
Q: Pardon?
M: Well, I ... I don't remeber much from my days as a drone, but there were patterns, familiar things. One of them was that the feeding we rogues do-uh, I'm calling Changelings who aren't part of a hive connection 'rogues' by the way-when we feed, it's... uh, incomplete. Normally we would either capture the energy and bring it back to the hive, or capture the pony and bring them back.
Q: And do what with either?
M: ...well the energy, they had some way of refining it. That was above my grade, but I do remember the feed, indescribable. A nectar that was sweet in every sense of the word, like emotion refined into a smooth syrup.
Q: And the pony? Did they get 'refined' into syrup?
M: I don't think so. I already told this to [redacted] but... again, I don't know how they did it, but there's some way to encase a pony, put them into a dream state, and slowly drain their emotions continuously. They must have been getting some nutrition because I remember the same pods being present for at least several weeks.
Q: That concludes the actual questions for this session.
M: Ok, good.
Q: I would like to ask you a couple of further questions about yourself, though.
M: {sighs} sure, why not?
Q: You have previously indicated that your 'dining' habits have been altered. How?
M: You mean how were they altered? I don't know, you'd have to ask Flim and Flam, I think they just figured it out by trial and error. If you meant what did they do to me, they got me in a mindset where I really only like the taste of adrenaline-dependent emotions. Excitement, Fear, that kind of thing. As long as I was working the act, I got fed pretty well several times a week.
Q: And now?
M: I... I haven't fed in the last two weeks.
Q: But won't you starve?
M: Probably. I'm already feeling sluggish. But you said you'd help me, so I'm trying to go by your rules.
Q: But, we didn't understand your needs... something needs to be done about this.
M: Well, that'd be nice.
Q: Why are you doing this?
M: Why did you give me a chance? Curiosity, and to prove that I have control over my own actions. I might not have been born with an 'I', but now that I have it it's the only thing really precious to me.
[interview concluded]
"Ok, does everypony know why they're here?" Rainbow Dash glanced at the clipboard one last time.
"This is stupid, the building was abandoned!" Scootaloo grumbled.
"We're really, really, reeeeeally sorry it caught fire."
"Ah jus' can't figure out what went wrong. We used all the right ingredients."
"Look, you three are banned from ever trying Cherries Jubilee ever again. Just give the Cutie Mark Crusader Sous Chef idea up. You were told after the spaghetti incident you were on probation. Ya blew it."
"But, we just want to earn our Cutie Marks. The sooner we can do that, the sooner you stop having random explosions all over town."
'I'm... going to assume that wasn't a threat.' "Look, you're all enthusiastic. Great. But you have like, No Self Control and you three get... carried away. 'Coach Dash' is going to set you straight."
"Um, I'm here because Rarity said I had to be."
"You're a dragon, Spike, mass destruction is assumed."
"Uh, thanks?"
"When we are on the field you will call me Coach Dash, 'Coach', or Master."
"Yes sir, Master Coach, ma'am." 'Eh, close enough.'
Three plus one looked at the fifth member of their little troop. A tan pegasus filly with olive hair.
"And her?"
"Innocent Bystander, chosen at random."
"...what?"
"Hokay, Q and A is over! We'll start with some basic stretches before moving on. Scoot, you've done this so you're going to be the demo-pony... DEMONSTRATION! Where the hay did you even get Dynamite!? Give me that!" 'When did she light it!? Oh Mane, what the hay have I gotten myself into?' "New plan, skip the stretching and RUN!"
Enjoying the early evening breeze, Twilight hummed to herself as she contemplated the task before her. Splayed out before her, again, were reams of statistics from town hall, animal population census, survey of arable land and lakes, and a listing of all active weather team members along with reserves and emergency leave requests. This was her moment to shine, when it all came together and chaos was woven into order. This was-a loud thump resounded from the hallway outside her room, followed by an even louder sigh.
"Apple Bloom? What's wrong?"
"All yer friends are insane!"
"Have you just now noticed that?" She smirked.
"Ah'm talkin about Rai- Coach Dash. Ah'm too pooped to pop, an' ah don't even know what that means!"
"Wait, are you hurt, or just cranky?"
The youngest Apple drew herself up to her full height, put on her 'serious' face, and reared onto her back legs to reach Twilight's eye level. "Ah am NOT Cranky, that mare is CRAZY!" 'Know what you're not talking about? Your Cutie Mark, or lack thereof. Sorry, Rainbow, but for now it's better having them annoyed with you and out of trouble.'
..
...
There was nopony to hear the whirring grinding noise as the blue box slipped into existence from nowhen. The door opened and a brown head poked out, the stallion looking left, right, and straight ahead. "Blast, not here either. I do wish I could assume I was mistaken. Well, ten minutes forward then." With another sighing whir the box faded from view again.
1284295 Oh no, it's finally happened. I have managed to throw in so many references I don't even notice them...
1284497 D'you know you're the first to catch that? Hats off to yer.
I really like the Diane parts though the question remains about how long can she go like this. The precocious party pony is pining to participate in Ponyville. Can she reconcile that and if that party side does fully surface what will happen to her and her personality. She is the one where this instability can be really interesting. I have seen hints of the Pinkie sense and of the silly fun that she suppresses. Hope to see more on that for sure.
Wait let me guess, gloing by the cover art:
Pinkie is a medic, Twilight is a balloon pilot, Shyshy is the weather captain, AJ cross-pollinated apples and oranges, Dashie is an artist, and Rarity... is a cult leader? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Rarity_lolface.png Idk, it isn't quite a pentagram, but I have no other ideas.
Adding to my read later list. Hopefully I get to it this year. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Luna_apple.png
1284611 always bet on Pink
1284618 See you when you make it back around, I'll let you find out what you got right and wrong.
... where did all of you come from?
No matter, welcome and enjoy the ride
This is interesting. I'm not sure I like AJ as Laughter, but I've never really seen her at it. It actually seems like Twi would be a good element of Laugter, but honestly, none of it can ever be quite perfect, you know?
I like what you've got going on here. Rarity as the Element of Magic is cool, and it's nice to see that there's no single most important character. I also really like your Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy.
I've been noticing spelling errors here and there, but they seem more like typos than anything.
You've definitely earned my favorite. I definitely like the changes you've made to Dash and Flutters, and I have to say that out of all of them, "Dianne" is the most interesting of them all.
"The Logical Song" FTW
... Can't believe you missed the opportunity to use "the Derpy quote" right there...
As excellent as always, but... maybe it's just me, but it seems you jumped around more erratically in this chapter? At the scene where they are "conspiring" to confront RD, I had a hard time keeping each character to their quotes where you didn't indicate who was talking; had to read that scene twice to get what was happening. That could just be me, though...
Welp, just finished reading this. It's good, I like it. A new take on the "What if" scenario. I've got a few of my own brewing, but this one is tasty to my eyes. Continue it.
I just bum-rushed this entire fic. I am now current. I am now... not so happy with myself. That's one more story that I have to wait for to update. Now what am I going to read while waiting?
1285419 I see where you're coming from, but Twilight is just such a good straight-mare, that takes more talent than out gets credit for.
1285635 Supertramp is a fave of mine
1285980 Itoo, but if you use it every time the magic wears off... who am I kidding, I blew it.
No, it's not just you. This chapter leads into the rest of the story, but I went through two edits and a re-write. None of the cast are very happy with me now, but at least I get to leave one patch of melodrama behind now.
1286001 The work continues.
1286183 your voracity is impressive.
1287051 Hey, you made an appearance in the featured box, and I can't resist a little alternate universe tale!
1287039
Wait, what?
Supertramp?
LOGICAL SONG?
That song fits Pinkie/Diane awesomely.
Did you reference it in a chapter? I don't think I noticed it.
let's play identify the references... we have a TF2 reference with demopony, the end had a doctor who reference, fairly certain the feed off emotions like fear and excitement is something from another fanfic,
1287066 I what? Wow, no pressure right?
1287260 The extras after 'Battle', Twilight does karaoke.
Honestly, there's probably a Supertramp song for everpony...but being all over the board is what I'm about. I wouldn't mind throwing in some Grace Slick and Janelle Monae somewhere.
Speaking of, I've seen a Janelle Ponae, but no Cindy Neighweather. Where's the love my fellow fandroid bronies?
1284866
I am not sure anymore how I came to read this story in the first place. The story is dynamic and I don't ever recall seeing a writing style like yours.
Edit: Feature box? A comment you posted? I don't know.
1288725 Well, it's hard to hit a moving target.
My style-maybe approach is what I mean-switches between chapters, as my first fanfic I wanted to try out a lot of different storytelling methods.
I borrow from a pretty wide range of writers and media, and this story finally gives me a use for all the practically useless trivia that haunts my brain.
However you got here, you're here now. If I can entertain you for a while, that is enough.
Edit: Oh thank goodness, the next chapter is coming along much easier. I was afraid 'Bleak Season' had broken my rhythm.
Ow my head. Dude, you are an amazing writer and I love the story, but by god do I have a headache from reading this. I will pick it back up latter I need a break.
1336310 I-I'm sorry, please don't hurt yourself. It does get better again
You ponies who can power through twenty chapters like that amaze me. I'm not really sure my writing is safe in such large doses
Ah. Before I go to bed, I just wanted to say: I read this chapter.
Lol.
It's not that it's bad or even 'average' it's like ... A lot of people say they don't like the 2nd and 3rd Hunger Games books. I posited a theory that this is because in the first book, everything is fresh and new and intriguing and interesting. As you go on, everything is ... the same-old (I have a few book series that are doing that to me at the moment.)
But, I digress. While I can say I'm getting used to your the writing style you used for most of this chapter, I was intrigued and excited by the transcripts of the interviews. I can't say that I enjoy the letters, but you definitely did the interviews well. ... They were pretty awesome, actually. Just the right amount of telling things and omitting things.
Yeah, so, in short: I think script-writing is your best writing style (at this point in your writing ... uh ... career, for want to a better word.)
Yeah, so ... cool story, bro (can you tell it's past bedtime? )
1455527 Well, folk do say they like the talky bits. The lack of momentum during 'A Variant Season' is why I eventually want to split the story and re-write the entire thing. I just loath writers who seemingly abandon their work halfway through so I decided I would finish the story before I even try to negotiate a severed retelling with the site staff (they really hate reposts).
...sleep is good, you should try some
"redacted", huh? do i assume you're a semi-regular at the SCP Foundation website?
2842334 The... [googles] oh, ah... no. I think I've been there one other time because there was a FiMFIC that was intentionally part of that. Nah, redaction is a standard part of semi-anonymous interview agreements.
I must restate that you do excellent characterization
19 chapters in and I don't think you've slipped once
2617259 ... I was thinking about calling her 'Shimmer', before Equestria Girls came out
2905379 Both 'Gleam' and 'Flicker' have good and bad points
2905389
Moonlight Glow?
brilliant!
my sides!
/5
Well, that's one way to deal with problems.
I
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Applebloom >> Apple Bloom.
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This was another memorable chapter, I can't wait to get to the chapter where they replicate the cloudboom.
Once again, we are seeing how his story is so good at putting their personalities into new roles while still keeping them in character. We all know how Dash takes failure to heart, how she always put limits to conquer even though she is already above hem, so seeing her denying a piec of herself makes sense. We alo she how havingTwilight handle the Winter Wrap up early affects this timeline