Mayor Silver trotted to the train station in the early sunrise. He was going off for his annual summoning before the crown to give his report on how the town was doing both physically and economically. He also also had a separate report, the Arca report. Its contents need no explanation.
Thankfully, it was early morning so there were few ponies waiting for the train. As such, he could rest his aging body on one of the benches, trying to get comfortable. There was a pony wrapped in a blanket next to him, sleeping. Odd, as homelessness was only a thing in Rainbow Falls after Arca had a particularly bad episode. Still, he decided to be a gentlestallion and wake the poor soul up before any guards came by. He poked the sleeping form gently with a hoof. “Hey, I hate to be rude, but you might want to get up before you get in trouble, fella.” After all, Silver thought, it's not like he was waking up a walking disaster magnet. The bundle of fabric shuffled, then a head poked out.
“Good morning, Mayor Silver!”
Scratch that, Silver had just woken up THE disaster magnet.
“Arca. Might I ask why you are sleeping out here… alone… even though you have a fully furnished house? And good morning.” He added that last bit in, but far be it from him or any town native to not be nice to the pony who had seen them grow up and supported them.
“Oh, I have an important delivery coming in on a train.”
“I should have guessed that one, honestly. Want to read the paper with me? Might help pass the time.”
Arca made motions to respond, but the distant whistle of a train made his ears perk up. Silver, on the other hoof, simply looked confused as the train pulled into the station. “Odd. The trains don't usually run this early… I'm on the first one and it's not due in for another half hour.” A pony emerged from the the only passenger car on the freight train, with six boxcars trailing behind it. Perhaps, Silver thought, this stallion would explain things.
“Delivery for Arcane Catalyst! Four train cars of cheddar cheese and two train cars of tortilla chips!”
Of course it is. Silver sighed. “Well, I suppose I'll need to update the Arca report on the ride to Canterlot. Why did you even get that much cheese for? Please don't tell me you're ‘upgrading’ your sofa fort.”
Arcane finished signing for the delivery and teleported the contents of the boxcars away in a flash of light. “Okay first off, it's a COUCH fort. Second, edibles aren't a good building material, at least for the support beams I need to add. No, this is just stuff to make nachos.”
“You need six train cars’ worth of supplies to make a snack?”
“I REALLY like nachos.”
Silver sat back down, and held the newspaper to his face so he couldn't see anything. “I'm getting in the next train to Canterlot, Arca. Whatever you're planning, have it cleaned up by the time I get back Monday.”
“Yes, sir!”
Juniper woke up from a fantastic dream about a world made of food. It was a great dream, and it made her ready to start the day, so she got herself breakfast and sat down to eat. She sniffed the bowl of warm oatmeal, allowing the strong scent of cheese to overtake her.
“Wait, cheese?”
Sure enough, all she could smell was cheese. It blocked out every other scent in her house, and that meant that there was a LOT of cheese nearby. And whenever there was a ridiculous amount of something, there was usually one recurring culprit. So, deciding to forgo her morning meal for the time being, she flew out the front door and took to the skies, once more playing ‘spot the difference in town’. She quickly noticed the situation, and flew down to investigate. “Boss! Boss!”
“Oh, good morning Juniper!” Arca smiled at his apprentice, bouncing eagerly on the high dive of the public pool. “Did you come to swim, too?”
“Boss, why is the pool filled with molten cheese and chips!?”
“Well, you know how that pony who was giving motivational speeches last week said to follow your dreams? I dreamed about this, and it's awesome! A whole pool full of nachos!”
“Boss, this could be dangerous!”
“Danger schmanger! I only have one thing to say to that Juniper!” Arca bounced a bit higher on the diving board, ready to leap.
“And that would be…?”
“MUCHOS NACHOS, MUCHACHOS!”
And with that, he dove in, making a bloop noise as he entered the mixture. There was around three seconds of peace and quiet before Arca emerged from the near-boiling liquid, screaming his lungs out in pain, and running off, crashing through the pool's fence while he was at it.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"
Today was a very important day. The shop was perfectly decorated, the camera crew was ready along with several high-ranking staff and investors, and Emerald Essence was wearing her best, most expensive dress. It had taken years of careful investments and saving, but her franchise was about to welcome a very important pony. She turned around and addressed her team one more time.
“Alright, ponies. It's been a few years since our last milestone, so you all might be a tad rusty… for your own sake, don't be! Whoever walks through that door next and buys something is our official ten millionth customer, be they pony or... otherwise!” she shuddered at the thought of having to be cheerful and welcoming to, Celestia forbid, a Griffin or even worse, a Zebra. It was a pretty well-known fact that Emerald was one of the most specist ponies around. Still, she was willing to swallow her pride for good press, as their ten millionth customer would be receiving a free (she mentally shuddered again at that word) necklace worth around three thousand bits, and have their picture on national news. She could not screw this up.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"
With no warning, a giant blob of molten cheese that appeared to be wailing in agony burst through the door to the shop. Surprisingly enough, it did stop to wipe its hooves while still screeching, then resumed its blind rampage as it knocked over displays, flung gooey cheese all over the reporters and investors, and stained Emerald's white dress. All the while it continued screaming and crashing into things, leaving a trail of sticky destruction in its wake and causing irrevocable stains on the walls, carpet, and ceilings.
Emerald just stood with her jaw wide open in shock as she watched her shop get trashed by a monster. But, in the confusion, it knocked over the display of candy necklaces Emerald had for foals, and managed to toss a bag of bits onto the counter, essentially qualifying it as a customer. Cameras went off and Emerald could only stare as the blob of molten cheese walked right by her, the giveaway necklace being picked up in a magical field and a high-temperature mix of chips, cheese, and candy necklace was shoved in her mouth.
“AAAAAAAAAA-Thanksforthegifthavesomenachos-AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!”
And with that, the still-blinded blob creature ran out of the shop still wailing in pain, leaving Emerald to seriously question:
“What the everliving BUCK just happened?!”
The reporters swarmed in, trying to hold back laughter. “Can we quote you on that, Miss Essence? Anything you want to say about your, heh, ten millionth customer?”
“GET OUT OF MY STORE!!”
Okay, now Arca is officially my spirit animal. That guy knows how to party.
9386592
Hey! I had first dibs!
But I'm willing to share.
Wow if he is willing to give away a 3k necklace just like that, I wonder what he does for junipers birthdays
9386618
Well, he IS a living Philosophers Stone. Combined with the fact that he's at least a thousand years old, a couple thousand bits probably doesn't mean much to him.
9386663
9386618
He got it for free, and loose jewlery isnt part of lab safety, but yeah, Arca's loaded. He's got investments all over Equestria and the lands beyond, but he simply doesn't care for money, really. If he can afford to keep making potions, he has enough cash.
And in the event he DOES run out of funds, the philosopher's stone can turn base metals to gold...
That was awesome, hilarious and sweet all at the same time.
Of
Bruschetta boat. Arca is a goddamn GENIUS!!
One does not swim in nacho cheese. One also does not eat that much nacho cheese and ever use the restroom again.
On the upside, free nachos for the town after Arca is utterly incapable of eating anymore.
The one question no one seems to be pondering is how do you heat up that much nacho cheese.. can 9nly guess Acra did a little more tunneling under Rainbow Falls to access some geothermal energy
9387110
Eh. He didn't really eat any... plus theres probably a potion for that.
9387120
Please refer to chapter 2 where Arca drops the temperature to well below freezing. It stands to reason he could easily flip that spell on its head to flash-boil cheese... especially since he worked directly under Celestia for dozens of years.
9387132 I know more fun and potentially energy efficient to use geothermal and the pool would be heated all year round
9387110 probably Nachos for the whole town and several others around it. GUESSING they might need a few more chips with that much cheese
Hmm...
(Alondro dips his hand in molten cheese)
Interesting... the skin of my hand seems to be peeling off. How fascinating. Is this sensation that 'pain' thing? Extraordinary! I do believe it's exceedingly unpleasant!
9387212
...true. but consider this: Today I was more focused on my new vr headset than minute details like how the pool was heated. Spoilers: vr is fun
9387530
You do have an honest point there good person of the Internet. However I still love the final battle of Brotherhood! Very moving, and I lost one of my favorite characters in that scene T-T
9387601 sounds fun. When you dont have other distractions things like this are fun to think about especially considering the charecter and thier past actions
seriously juniper You didn't think about when he'd turn the store into a Massive cookie oven
Can I join in?
Hey atleast the cleanup would have been fun, Nacho party anyone?
9387596 Well clearly you took this idea from ME!! I demand all the royalties! ALL THE ROYALTIES!!
*Alondro gets 45% of $0.00*
I'M RICH!! *Alondro was reeducated with Common Core math...*
A bruschetta boat no, no, no, what you want is a giant Panera Bread bread bowl boat
i.pinimg.com/236x/df/a8/a0/dfa8a0383b40970b7eb5619a7b315fa6--potato-meme-mlp-funny-memes.jpg
9389316
Pamarea bread you mean
Either way I can't eat there because allergies so i didnt consider that one... stupid tree nut allergy...
9389510 I Imagine that Arca has a potion for that
This chapter Emerald getting the short stick all the time
I mean, I'm fairly sure that actual nacho cheese can be warmed due to it being a mixture that's much closer to being a sauce normally -- 90F or 40C or something, and be liquid. Which is fine for touching to skin/fur. Arca must have gotten the regular cheese which needs to be much more hot.
9386849
Until gold is devalued by mass quantities
Nacho best Idea, Arca. It was pretty Gouda, but Cheddar luck next time with the pool.
"and arca most definitely, 100%, no doubt about it, earned to brie more careful," Juniper then awoke with tears in her eyes as she realized it was a dream.
Well there is cream cheese might no be the same as narcho cheese but you could still swim in it
I believe I know where he's going
Well of course he did, just because you're covered in molten, and no doubt scalding, cheese, doesn't mean it's okay to be rude, something Arca clearly understands
Your ten millionth customer came barging in, using the door this time impressively enough.
He was covered in molten cheese, was in a great deal of pain and started flailing around, crashing into things, painting you walls, dress and more with the aforementioned cheese.
Then he bought a candy necklace, have you some nachos, cheese and candy.
After that, he grabbed his prize and left
I firmly believe that Juniper caught up to Arca, saw where he was going, and decided to suddenly be just a little out of shape
Never a dull day, with Arca nearby
At least it wasn't the Schmooze.
I would think the inverse ratio would be superior since cheese packs much more.densely than chips?... Or maybe equestrian uses cars insulated with saw dust with giant blocks of ice on top.to ship perishables and that greatly reduces the amount of actual cheese in the cars?
Or maybe Arca just likes nachos with THAT MUCH cheese?
11572566
Smooze I believe?
Although if you melded all the synchophants (sp?) in Canterlot into one amorphous being you might get what you said?