I`m Russian, I`m female, I`m blunter then a bag of hammers and I write pony staff occassionally. That`s about it.
Twilight didn`t really expect anything to happen. After all, it`s just tea time with Fluttershy. Who could have possibly expected anything wrong with it? But, as she is about to learn, Ponyville just has to throw her a curveball.
Crackship experiment. I accept no responsibility for any lost hair, sleep, patience, it or anything else caused by perusing this.
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Wait, a Warthog?
Can we call it a Puma? It looks more like a Puma :P
7485739 i get the reference
7485765 it had to be done.
Well, at least it wasn't John Cena again.
7485739 What the Sam Hill is a puma?!
7486162 it's a big cat, you know?
7486174 You're makin' that up.
7486177 I'm telling you, it's a real animal!
7486191 Simmons, I want you to poison Griff's next meal!
"Yes, sir!"
You see these two tow-hooks? They look like tusks. Now what kind of animal has tusks?
7486206 a walrus
7486209 Didn't I just tell you to stop makin' up animals?!
A fighter jet, Rainbow Dash? You can do so much better than that.
Alucard: The Lockheed SR71 Blackbird. A reconnaissance aircraft with a top of mach 3 and a maximum altitude of 85,000 feet!
You know an awful lot about it, Alucard.
Alucard: Do you even read my Christmas list?!
Applejack. Said. Dinnae. That was weird, though kinda funny for how jarring it was! Story overall? Characterisation was quite good, (Pardon the dinnae disaster, I dinnae think it was real when I saw it.) the comedy though, it didn't quite hit home for me, nor did the ending. (Though humour IS subjective! So someone else may get more out of this story than I did. ) Mostly I kinda just went through the story. That was that, it was done when it was done. Not that it was an unpleasant experience, just not really engaging, y'know? Fun idea though! Props for that!
7488392
Since I`m not quite privvy to english accents and argos, I sometimes do give Apples odd words to say. Not exactly intentional, but I`ve been told that my idea of Southern drawl can vary from accurate to scottish to aussie to cockney to just plain gibberish.
As for plot? It was literally a "alright, watch this" in response to some idle chat conversation about shipping RD with everything and the kitchen sink. Since I`m usually a stickler for reasonable, some "you can`t do that" sentiments were expressed, and this is a retort. Don`t expect too much, I literally threw it together in like half an hour.
7489004 Ah yes, I getcha! I've wrote a story like that once too! And about the dialect stuff, I totally understand, plus I did find it pretty funny. I love Scottish people! Still, pretty good story!
I knew it! I knew it! I freaking knew it! Human tag? Rainbow Dash dating a "warthog"? Ha! You don't slip that one by someone who pumped a hundred hours into A-10 Tank Killer II as a kid!
7486209 7486404
Hey! What are you guys talking about?
7505084
Yeah, I didn`t exactly bother to hide this all that much. Just "warthog" alone from Fluttershy may have been insufficient, but when Applejack namedrops "Aten", it`s kind of a no-brainer from there. Rarity`s aristocratic ideas about the name are simply fluff on top of that.