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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Is he talking to himself? FUCKING AGAIN?!?!?!?
7136976
It does say unedited all the chapters have had these sorts of problems between ponies talkin to themselves to very poor sentence structure i highly recommend the author thuroughly rereads the story or get an editor. These kinds of mistakes should really be takin care of during the draft.
In the show she could also have said "don't worry they catch you"
It is just a bit sad that he is already supposed to be OP. and even if you often say he is stronger than her, he often enough has moments where he is in trouble, but maybe it looks just odd because of the timeskips.
Maybe you should really consider to not make him the guy with the easy solution and somehow try to change him a bit, or trying to find stronger enemys. Maybe let something happen that makes him to give up a part of his strength and to relearn some of the strength.
I'll be honest to you, it is strange that I can't decide what I want to happen, in a way it is always said that he is so super strong, then there are guys who can easily keep him busy even if they don't win.
Then he is nearly able to kill Nightmare moon at least it looked like it, but then when the second encounter happened he is suddenly more or less easy overpowered. Maybe it is just something you have still to learn, and I'm not mad because of this, it is just that I think it's strange that I'm not exactly happy with him looking to OP, and even not to happy with him being suddenly easily beaten. However maybe I have to think that he had that sort of weakness and even if he probably knew it wasn't the true, that he couldn't endure it.
Okay the only question I have because I don't know if you meant that sentence like this is, what Twilight meant with he was supposed to do only so much.
That was dark but, it wasn't the darkest thing I ever read. Anyways what a way to end a chapter. Still love it though.
This fic is horrifyingly blunt, but I don't care.
Happy Writing,
-Bright Light
... a throne. Inside a paw. Excuse me, but... what?