7 human beings are sent to Equestria one night. With no known way to return, they could be stuck there. How will they fit into the storyline?
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These relationships are kinda rushed, and not just AJ and Jack, same with RD and Xavier. I mean sure the stuff you mentioned in your authors notes made sense, but with the bad 1st impression RD made, she wouldn't just want to be in a relationship with that person, espessially someone they just met. And Xavier, being in a totally new world full of talking, candy coloured ponies, wouldn't be looking for a new relationship so soon.
6619920 Who said Xavier is looking to be in a relationship right now? In fact, where does it say Rainbow and Xavier are in a relationship? I think you're misinterpreting things. I really don't think I'm rushing things, because that's exactly what I'm trying not to do. Applejack is the only exception because I think she can pull it off. Some people can. As Jack said, Rainbow is Xavier's best friend on the female side. If you've read the author's note, Xavier is still trying to figure out how it would or could work between a human and a pony, therefore he's not really set on the idea of dating a pony. Too many unknowns to go through with it. And the thing is, there hasn't been a Rainbow POV yet, so we have no clue what is going on through her head, from the audience's perspective. I can assure you though, there are many things going through Xavier's mind, and the want for a relationship isn't one of them at the moment. I hope that clarifies things.
6621816 Ok fair enough, and no offense about my previous statement. I've just read so many romance stories were characters get in a relationship in less then a week, or even a couple of days of meeting eachother, and it's so annoying and unrealistic. There needs to be chemistry, and character development building though out the story, to make the characters want to be together. When authors have them be a couple just like that, it just makes the relationship seem bland and anticlimactic. Your doing good though, keep it up.
6621851 Exactly! Funny thing is, I was just saying the same thing in a forum yesterday about another fiction I was reading. The very first chapter upon arrival, the writer's character fell for Twilight Sparkle upon first sight . And yeah it's been a little over a week before the Jacks started their relationship. If you've read carefully, they do have a bit of chemistry. Jack respects and appreciates AJ's line of work. I've read many good fictions that paired anons/humans with AJ, and in most of those fictions, that's all Applejack wanted along with keeping her family's farm running. Those humans/anons most of the time were previously farmers or loved the country life. I just decided to mix things up a bit. He also loves her cooking. His comment about her making her future husband happy may or may not have sparked her interest in him. And AJ said she needed someone to keep her in check as well and make sure she doesn't overwork it and make sure she doesn't cause trouble for anyone as well as embarrass herself. As Xavier said, they both have been spending a lot of time together, even in that short amount of time.
And I'm already almost half way done with the next chapter, which will include the episode Griffin Brushoff. How do you think the humans will treat Gilda?
6622144 WOW, you REALLY put a lot of thought into the relationships in this story, you really do know what your doing. As for Gilda..... Will the humans be having extra large chicken wings by the end of the chapter?
6622482 As you said, things need to be a bit realistic than some of the fictions I've read. There will be no Mary/Gary Sues in this story either. I'm generally a heavy thinker.
This is good. Real good I like where this is going. Keep up the good work
I senses a large bucket of Kentucky fried Gilda in the future.
You know, after reading the second or third chapter, I was already thinking to myself, "Why isn't Jack's nickname, Jackass?" I mean it really fits with his character, seeing as how he mostly acts like an obnoxious douche, and wouldn't it just be funny to hear Xavier, Jeff, or Traevon to say to him, "Did you sleep well, Jackass?" or something like that?
Jack: YOU BETRAYED THE LAW!
Applejack: LAAAAAW!
Oh boy I did not think Jack would of been that excepting of a mare friend right off the bat