A United States Marine is ordered to clear an Iraqi house containing "suspicious activity", but little did he know a mad Arab scientist had created a portal device which was originally intended to bring "the fires of Allah onto the Infidels" but accidentally sucks the marine into Equestria which is facing the greatest threat in its history. Can he fight off Discord, hordes of changelings, rebels, tons of other monsters and armies?
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Okay I realized that this whole "second person view thing isnt working to well so starting next chapter its all gonna be third person (like "jim went to the store" instead of "you went to the store") I might change it back to second person if I think it works better that way but thatll be at a later time.
Ok, decent, but you should go through with a fine comb and proofread it.
...
Why?
Just why?
whats the point of replacing only the vowels of the swear words with a star
779501 You should also be more descriptive and literary. Make it come to life. See if anyone on the site will proof it for you. I know there are a few proofing groups.
779568 sorry about that I thought I proof read the whole thing earlier, guess i missed a chapter
779692 Well there where a good deal of minor mistakes in all of the chapters (note, its always I, not i. Noticed that a few places, even in Twilight's Letter you have it as i). By the way I like the switch to third, you seem to be doing much better with it than second. Might consider reworking the older chapters so they're third and are just as good as the later ones.
It's a really good idea but I'm not really a fan of second person.
i thought he would be so pissed he do some chuck noris moves and knock out all the main 6 and the princess
783640 yeah i bailed out of second person by chapter 3 or four. im too lazy to check
shit just got real...
779761 Thanks man just did that
779761 Thanks man just did that>>783640 I've changed it all to third just now feel free to reread or go onto the next chapters
Bah, i like it! I say Wundeba!
ha ha LAW for the win......wonder what other weapons he has and well as what sort of combat equipment I.E. grenade types, claymores, trip mines ect....
I lol'd
hmmmm this is a great cliffhanger........please fix that i have a very strong hate of cliffhangers
FIRST! Man that felt good.
No spoilers! (someone dies)
No spoilers indeed. Cant wait for next chapter.
nice, but a bit short.
Seriously cliffhanger?
1257038
eeyup i figured if there was anypony in trouble that could be incredibly cliffhangery it would be Fluttershy
tube the Humvee for the love of all good cider, rain some M203 styled hell upon them
(AJ is one of top 3 best ponies)
This won't end well.
HOW ARE THEY JUST OKAY WITH HIS EXISTANCE?!?!?!?!
moar please
*cock gun* shit has indeed gotten real
funny.
-Jonas Savimbi, Call of Duty Black Ops 2, Mission: Pyrrhic Victory.
Nothing Call of Duty related gets past me. (Ironically, considering my name)
2371387
I was really hoping someone could catch that. Awesome bro!
"WHY. WON'T. YOU. DIE!!!!!"
Elder Scrolls 4 reference
good to see it update
Let me tip my imaginary hat for you. Good day sir.
What happened to his anger, i was expecting (and wanting) for him to sucker punch Celestia in the face for causing servere pain and burns. Like damn this guy is so passive i see this becoming boring
Nah man if i was that marine i wouldn't trust them to know what and how my weapons work let alone trust them to walk with 100 yards of me after being burnt to a crisp (with internal damage) from the elements of harmony
A little to fast
😢
Gone but not forgotten
"I got your nose "
How about " I got your tail " I would LOVE to actually have a tail IRL like a horse or pony growing out just above my butt ..
fuck you celestia, you are an ass hole