This story is a sequel to The Tales of Prince Onyx
After Onyx have been killed by the evil Changeling Queen Equestria a drastically changed; Celestia have lost all interest about her kingdom, Blueblood proclaimed himself emperor of Equestria and the Griffin empire, now under the rule of a new Emperor, still want to get their claws on the Equestrian Throne.
YEAH!!!!!!!
plz bring onyx back. i dont know how but do it!!!!!
Well shit, Blueblood's in charge...as if things weren't bad enough for the kingdom...Still I enjoyed this, and I beleive it was well worth the wait.
Can't wait to continue reading, but I shall be patient....ish
...A bit too grim from the get-go, but all in all, I look forward to seeing Onyx come back and beat Blueballs into his proper place.
Glad to see an new story but how in the world did Twilight had a son? I guess the next chapters or two will explain.
This is going to be really unsubtle, isn't it?
Heck, the obvious bully character is even called "the bully" by the narrative. Doesn't exactly leave much room for interpretation.
Now if something unexpected happens, like, say, Blueblood performing as more than just a negative backdrop against whom the OC protagonist can look good...
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I made it obvious because it the first thing I wrote for the past 7 month and I kinda rushed myself for it. (which why the chapter is not even 2k words.) But I plan on making the next chapters in better quality.
with Blueblood in control, Canterlot has leaked into Ponyville. This can't be good
Grammar has improved... good. I'll fave, see how this goes.
What the heck happened?
Ousting Celestial and Luna from the throne? So now we have widespread bigotry for the unicorns who have bought power. Disgusting. This will turn into a wildfire that will burn down the entire nation if it isn't stamped out, with the oppressed calling out for Blue boy's head on a pike.
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I decided to return to my roots when I made Blueblood an Asshole...I think people like hating him
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That's rather blunt. I think people just like to have an identifiable villain or know who the main antagonist is. Blueblood, to me, got off on the wrong hoof. We had one night to see this guy and not too much else to go on from there. That's just me though, how you want to write your story is all on you buddy. Good to see you back in action.
YES!!! finally man, I have high expectatives on this, by the way, i too release the sequel of my story fang, feel free to read it if you haven't.
The end to the first book was so sad
I taking a guess that Duck is Onyx and Twi's son. But the only evidence backing this is the sex scene in the clop stories for the first one and that is stretching it a bit.
YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESyayYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESitsYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYEShereYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESwoohooYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES
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Well ima put this in read later. Cuase i have no freaking clue on whats gonna happen
Ah, nice. I enjoyed your last story, despite it's flaws. You and author of The Monster of Canterlot help inspire me to do my own take on these kind of stories. I can't wait to see where you will take us this.
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First of all, this chapter seems a little rushed, the character's personalities appear to be very lacking in depth, and (please don't let these next couple of statements be to discouraging) your grammar skills are lacking, and the story overall lacking in depth. Don't be to upset by my rather blunt criticism. I think this story has a lot of potential and all it needs is little more effort to get off the ground and into the featured box. My suggestion, is that you get an editor or a friend (after all, friendship is magic right?),or family member that help you with your writing and overall story planning so as to get decent and satisfying (for you and the reader of course) chapters out at decent pace.
I am sooooo proud of you! Though this chapter can be better, it is a great start after your long break. I have Favorited, tracked, and Bookmarked this story, as well as liked it. You have my full support and I am so happy for you. (God I sound old) OKAY! LET'S CELEBRATE WITH CAKE!
I missed you so much
I'll admit I never did think I would enjoy your last story but I got into it and gave it the Benifit of the doubt, and I did in fact enjoy it greatly. Been a while sense i last read it but I have to admit the way you made this chapter seemed a tad rush.
Ether way, keep writing and more shall come!
FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (NOBODY FUCKING CARES GOBEMAN)....
YES NEW CHAPTER
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yep
NEW CHAPTER think you god
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also wooohoooo
"LOOK PEOPLE IM HAPPY WE GOT A CHAPTER LOOK AT MY HAPPY FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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Good, because the little sound that play when I got a notification made me lose my concentration so I could not dodge the Hex Attack that was going toward my allies who dodged it in the first place and Now I just lost 2m souls D:
:p Keep reading
This is so sad omfg
Can't wait to see where you take this.
Wait, I thought he had amnesia?
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I don't remember ever saying he had amnesia
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That kinda implies that he has (Or at least, up to the end of the chapter) amnesiaNever mind, just re-read the chapter
6041910 I thought I remembered reading the previous story, that when onyx arrived on earth, he couldn't remember anything. I dunno, maybe i'm wrong
6041975 He was in shock.
Just a little help with that little bit :)
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Thank you
this story has started off good, i hope to see what else happens.
Can't wait until more chapters come out. I have to say ur story's are some of the best I've read near the top of my list in fact and. One more thing, long live prince Onyx!!
Damn, Onyx is in a real tight pinch. I'm on the edge of my seat for the next update.
im gonna get you jerkmedia.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdebhoPTsp1ryktnq.gif
hey onyxs back yyyyyaaaayyyyy *sees titan*aaaaahhhhhh bullsh-2.bp.blogspot.com/-4VMa1fUkbz4/VLka4S5wJ1I/AAAAAAAAAQ0/-ktQZ2g7v6I/s1600/hmmmm.gif
You may not know this, but high taxes = bad economy. Home foreclosure is also one of the fastest ways to shoot the economy to hell. In a situation like this the economy would be in shambles, not "strong".
I also find it very hard to believe Celestia would fall this easily. Many kings from many civilizations past have lost their children but they continued ruling because it was their responsibility to. Celestia doesn't strike me as the type to give up on the kingdom that loves and needs her. It looks like this story will have the exact same problems as the last one. *sigh*
The underlined parts are unnecessary details. There are more but I'm pointing these two out specifically because they're so close together.
Why isn't the teacher stepping in immediately? "Evil triumphs when good men do nothing" and she did nothing at first. She temporarily allowed the archetypal, shallow, and poorly characterized "villain" to "triumph" when she could've easily stopped him after his first outburst.
Like it or not, he has a really valid point. The unicorns are very clearly the most powerful of the three races (excluding alicorns).
This sh*t again? You used almost the exact same BS plot point in the first one.
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Heh I was out of imagination for this.
As for Celestia, You said it yourself that she was not the usual Celestia the show showed us....so..yea depression.
6307901 Actually high taxes usually lead to a better economy and structure of the country. It's just that the taxes have to coincide with peoples wages, what the minimum amount people can work for is, and the value of the money. You see people complaining about how high taxes are bad for the economy but the people saying those things are rich jerks trying to keep their money.
6307918 whens the next chapter
Are u still doing this story, or not?
Interesting, I hope another chapter comes out.