A strange creature has appeared in The Frozen North. Princess Twilight has been dispatched to deal with it, but Princess Luna has also sent along some help. Unfortunately, Twilight doesn't consider Princess Luna's choice to be the best possible one.
But Twilight is going to need all the help she can get when she comes face to face with a creature of legends and myths. Something so powerful that even Starswirl feared it, and something so dangerous that even the Princesses are wary to challenge it.
Can a newly minted Princess and a shamed show pony manage to defeat this creature? If not, then all of Equestria will be in danger.
Written for EQD Writer's Training Grouds #006
Update: Sequel stories
A Shattered Stone
Trixie's Task
Chapters (1)
Good going with this one!
I felt Twilight and Trixie were completely in character. After the events of Magic Duel, it's not surprising that Trixie would be knocked down a peg or two and that she's unsure of herself. Especially in the presences of Princess Twilight. There's great chemistry between these two and it's fun to see them bounce off of each other.
I know what a Gazer is, though I thought that was a monster from Dungeons and Dragons. Maybe I'm thinking of a Beholder.
Some nifty mysteries in this one, though it looks like many won't be answered here. Still, this was a nice, compact story and it earns my like and favorite.
3908151
Hm...perhaps I am the one mixing up Beholder and Gazer. I am aware of a Beholder, but I could have sworn I'd heard the term Gazer before Dragon's Crown, but I can't find any references to them anywhere else.
Mysteries you say. Sequels say I. Although what mysteries might you be referring to? I may be able to answer a few of them, depending on what they are.
3911380
I've heard of a Gazer myself, but like you, I'm drawing a blank on where I last saw it. Must have been in a video game or sumthin'.
As for the mysteries I mentioned, the ones that stood out were Trixie's relation to Luna, why Trixie was sent there, and why the heck Luna sent the Alicorn Amulet. These don't necessarily need to be answered for me to enjoy this, because I did.
Very good story. Both characters felt very realistic. Trixie felt at the same time haughty and contrite, clearly having learned much from the Duel. Nice to see that I'm not the only one with the headcanon that Trixie only wanted to use the amulet to prove herself, and didn't intend on becoming a tyrant.
3911430
All very good questions...and all questions I can't answer. The best I can do is say that Luna is putting together a team, and she has a plan.
3911601
Yeah, I was typing that scene out and it suddenly clicked in my head. I remembered what Twilight said about 'High and mighty to mean and nasty' and I realized that Trixie, the real Trixie, would never want to do those things. Once she beat Rainbow, AJ, and Rarity, she didn't keep lording it over them. She left them alone. So yeah, it seemed like a good idea to have Trixie saying she was losing herself to the thing.
How did I miss this? Your characterization was spot on. The plot and flow of the story was excellent. Have a fav and a like.
4403714
I actually get that a lot--the 'How did I miss this?' question, I mean. Apparently my stories slip under a lot of radars. I blame it on the fact that I'm not really part of many groups.
Glad you enjoyed the story and thank you for the like.
Wow... I know I'm just echoing what others have already said, but your characterization was so good that it astounds me. I could totally picture something like this being a real episode. :O
I had no clue what a "Gazer" was at the beginning of the story, but you definitely did a good job of making it clear by the end. Additionally, similar to what I said before... I adore how you portrayed Trixie's character, just great (and powerful? I tried...).
Mane, these Twilight and Trixie friendship stories just give me this warm fuzzy feeling on the inside. xD Liked and going on my favourites list. ;)
4418672
Oh, echoing what others have said if fine by me. I am always happy to receive the undying love and worship of fellow ponies. Mua ha ha ha--er, I mean, thank you very much! Warm fuzzies all around! Yay!
Also, three points for trying with that pun.
Great story, and I'm pretty sure Gazer is what the original Final Fantasy called Beholders.
4575161
That sounds familiar, but I'm still not sure if that's where I first heard the name. Like I said, I could have sworn I heard the name before Dragon Quest, but when I looked it up, I found nothing.
Anyway, glad you liked the story and thanks for taking the time to comment.
4576491
That's right, I keep forgetting Dragon Quest is Dragon Warrior and that they came first. That's also what they're called in Ultima, though that also post-dates Dragon Quest. But yes, definitely an awesome story. As are the sequels.
Good story, but I feel that this portrayal of it doesn't do it justice. You could have embellished on it a bit more, explained why the other Elements were not allowed on the journey, and had Twilight and Trixie meet earlier. That way you could show the kind of abuse that Trixie was talking about first hand (as it were) and create more sympathy for her.
)
Unlikable characters (such as Trixie, Blueblood, Chrysalis, Lightning Dust, Gilda, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon [especially DT] Sombra, and Discord [although perhaps not so much these days as far as Discord is concerned]) need whitewashing through suffering and backstory at times to draw the proper amount of sympathy desired.
Case in point: everyone finds DT's putting down everyone that isn't Silver Spoon jerkish, but if you find out that she does it to mask the pain of her mother abandoning her at an early age makes her seem almost human (for lack of a better term). For added sympathy, have Silver Spoon been there to have watched it go down and promise to stick by her, even in DT's less than proud moments. (Hey might make a story of that when I find the time!
4952522
Not enough time or room in the story for that unfortunately. This was one of those writing challenges that had to be done within a week, and it had a word limit. The sequel stories kind of do what you suggest--flush out what Trixie went through--but her real story is where she'll get what you're asking for. Sadly, that story won't be out for a while, as I have to finish the other two big ones I'm working on first.
Gazer = Beholder.
vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/forgottenrealms/images/2/2c/Monster_Manual_5e_-_Beholder_-_p28.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20141109194926
6896566 Yeah, I figured they were the same and that the Beholder came first, but I could have sworn that I'd heard the term Gazer before and that is was rather common. It appears that that was not the case though, which left me rather confused.