When a pink hair is found at the crime scene of Rarity's murder, the first accused is Fluttershy. However she is warned by birds before they can get to her. She is then able to escape until she may be able to prove herself not guilty.
Chapters (9)
- Member Since 28th Sep, 2013
- offline last seen Feb 22nd, 2021
Foxes33
Writing is not literacy, but creativity.
Foxes33
Joined 28th Sep, 2013 ·
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Great Stuff!! Keep Writing!!
x100
It seems somewhat adventurous.
3292933 Glad to hear. I am excited to write the next chapter, but I can't tell you all of course.
Seems interesting. A bit hard to read at times. I'll keep reading see if it lives up to its potential.
May want to fix the Typos in the description... especially Rarity... that immediately puts me off reading this.
3336867 Okay, I honestly didn't notice... I will look at it.
3336871 To be clear, I mean the short description that comes up on the homepage under the Recent updated stories tab. The description here is fine, but the one that everyone sees first is the one one that matters most. Sorry if that sounded rude of me by the way...
3336877 Not at all. I don't mind being corrected and it is true. When someone sees a miss spell then it does affect the outcome.
3336882 Glad you understand :) I'll give this a read through sometime though. One typo doesn't mean the story deserves to be neglected.
I'd say, it's a sinusoid: the premise and first chapters were interesting, but then grammar mistakes and awkward phrases (but it's nothing a good editor can't fix) overwhelmed me and I lost interest halfway through. To be fair, I checked out the newest chapter, and it looks much better. So, try to keep that level of writing.
3342356 Yeah I tend to do that, probably because I am naturally a strange person, idk. I have been told this before and I try to keep it natural, and I might have been tired, I can' remember when I wrote these chapters...
Hmm... Not quite Murdershy, really, but thanks for the group submission anyways.
May be able to...
NOT MAYBE!!!!!
A little part of me died when I saw that.
That's also a run on sentence, you might want to fix that.
3503758
Oh, oops, can you please tell me where so I can fix it?
3508387
In the description.
When a pink hair is found at the crime scene of Rarity's murder, the first accused is Fluttershy. However she is warned by birds before they can get to her and she is able to escape until she maybe able to prove herself not guilty.
Put a space there!
3508832 Thanks for telling me.
Fixed it.
assets.sbnation.com/assets/2400511/shockedmatta.gif
My face while reading...