- Member Since 11th Oct, 2011
- offline last seen 1 hour ago
Pascoite
I'm older than your average brony, but then I've always enjoyed cartoons. I'm an experienced reviewer, EqD pre-reader, and occasional author.
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Beautiful story.
I am now very interested in what the two situations were
Ow, right in the feels.
I've been in both situations myself, but I'll admit I didn't go about solving the issue the way Mac did. This was wonderfully written, and it was eady to picture what was happening behind the letters, like AJ checking on Twilight and the dance. (The suspense was perfect, too. I couldn't even pay attention to the dates, I was reading so fast!) Thank you, both for a great piece of TwiMac fiction, and a flat-out heartwarming slice-of-life. I wish I could write this stuff the way you do.
Nice story, man the whole flutters likes dash hit me from left field then Mac realizing twi. Very expert, take a BROHOOF
Wow. That... May 5th was when I first figured that Mac was being shipped with Twi. June 15 hurt like
, July 11 brought in the FlutterDash ship, July 28th brought out incredulous Twi, September 12. Ouch.
Overall reaction: Great work.
My Reaction
Seriously, dude. That hit me right in the gut.
Dang. I've started listening to fics on my commute using a text-to-speech engine. There I am, driving along without a care, and *wham!* the dance hits and I nearly had to pull over and just experience my feelings.
I keep driving and then "Please stop writing to me." and I nearly had to pull over again.
12/10
Very good way of portraying the story and also very good use of emotion. Awesome read!
Some spoilers.
I spent half a minute looking at this line just saying "ouch", and when I read;
.....oh damn.
Great work on this, that ending was just fantastic.
3302221
OHhh. I would like to do that. Please forward details
Also, excellent story. Hit me right in the feels. Damn people hitting me in the feels. It hurts.
Anything inexperienced-me could write would not make this fic any justice.
Thank you, Pascoite. I really mean it.
3302221
Wow. I... hope I'm not causing any traffic accidents...
3301272
Yes, I was in a couple of Mac's situations, but the one that you seem to be referring to, where it's easy to fall in love with someone that's not around you anymore, can be a nasty little trap. Thankfully, I didn't fall in too far.
3302503
I love that moment when I'm reading a story and something just blindsides you and makes your jaw drop. I sure hope I gave a few people that moment! Thanks for reading!
Oh Mac... Been there, buddy. Been there for a good 2 whole years. This one didn't make me cry like your other one that I read tonight, but damn if I didn't relate. Only, you know, his situation worked out a lot better than mine did... A lot better... And that's why we have alcohol...
Beautiful
Simply beautiful
Hit close to home with me as well. Very well done, I'd be interested in a followup regarding their "talk" or efforts to repair their friendship, should you ever write it. In the meantime, upvoted, faved, and 'stached
I love dialogue stories like this. People claim that actions speak louder than words and sometimes there not wrong, an action can speak a thousand words but the problem is, actions have no subtly. Words can mean a thousand different things while saying something completely different. I applaud you in this story, and the way you worked the dialogue
Very nice. Emotional too.
God knows I'd messed up more than one relationship from being a thick ass.
3302503
There's a spoiler tag available, FYI. Just wrap it the text like so: [spoiler]uber secret stuff here[/spoiler] to get uber secret stuff here.
When I started reading, I thought Big Mac was just being subtle in hitting on Twilight.
When the truth came out, I was shocked and dismayed.
By the time I got to the end, I was crying.
Genuine emotion is hard to do. Nice job.
This has been said enough to lose all meaning:
Ow. Right in the heart.
But I really mean it.
My heart is hollow and sore. My arms are numb. My eyes are slightly blurry. I have a wistful, hopeful smile crinkling my cheeks even as bitter cynicism tugs from the opposite direction, pulling it into a sort of... optimistic scowl, really.
That was just brutal.
I loved it.
Emotion porn.
So this is what they call "being hit from the left field". It hurts.
Yep, it hurts. It hurts bad.
I'm keeping this story as a reference for the future. You know, what I should do if and when I got to situations like Big Mac's, so I may get the same ending
3302221 That's... one way to enjoy fanfics I guess...
The AWESOME way. Never thought of it before.
This was amazing, I did see the Fluttershy thing coming (didn't know it was Fluttershy but I knew it was somepony else) but it still hit hard. It was like watching a train wreck in slow motion, you knew it was coming but couldn't look away. Poor Twilight, that must have hurt so much, I know Big Mac got his share of pain too, but poor Twilight.
Wow.
You know, I always thought of using letters to tell a story as...well weak. Inferior to a 'real' story, nothing more than an excuse to account for disjointed ideas.
Sweet Celestia I was wrong.
This story. Was simply incredible. I don't know how else to describe it. Just, incredible. With one line, you broke my heart. That almost never happens to me. You did it twice in one chapter.
Bravo sir, bravo.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be in a corner.
Trying to figure out if these are happy tears or ohgodhowcouldyoudothatyouheartlessbastard tears.
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So that's how that's done, thank you you piece of this glorious site that I'm proud to be part of.
Gotta admit I'm dang impressed. You made Mac still sound like Mac, yet gave him a ton of dialog - brilliant bit of work right there - but then you go and have those absolutely beautifully timed punches:
"So, yeah, I’m going to the dance with Fluttershy."
"I can see ponies asking me if I understand you and wondering why you settled."
"Please stop writing to me."
It was exquisite.
You know, in this world you've got adrenaline junkies, sex junkies, drug junkies, pony junkies - pretty much every single thing you can think of, there's junkies for. Folks who just can't get enough and know exactly what the best stuff is because they've been grabbing up every scrap of every quality they can get their hands on.
Well, I'm an emotional junkie. I love things that cause a reaction - a true human experience of feelings. Happy, sad, anger, or any of those other sappy dwarves.
This...was good food.
Any plans for more?
That was wonderful. Any chance of a sequel? Though, the desire for a sequel may be entirely based on wanting to see Twilight get her date.
That was super sweet, and I liked the format. Thanks very much for writing!
Dammit not again, you got me in the feels with this one.
I used to prie myself on not getting emotional with fics, but ever since reading the stuff posted here I'm beginning to run outta liquid pride I swear.
Well written story, Will there be a sequel?
I don't think I looked at a date after the first few, but ohmygosh this is an amazing pice of fic. You know who to write two different characters amazingly. At the beginning, I couldn't decide if Mac liked Twi or someone else and then when Fluttershy was revealed, I swear I looked at the screen for a good five minutes. Then Twi kept getting shorter with her responses and then "Please stop writing to me happened."
I am really happy you didn't have Mac just be like...oh, I do actually love her. I had the wrong mare all along. Instead, you had him do things they way the characters would actually respond, and still managed to salvage a friendship. Now, I would love to see their walk to the farm and hear everything, and find out that maybe they do have a chance at being together or maybe Twi had the same problem as Mac; falling in love with some who isn't around because they aren't around.
I did that with a friend once. He went off to a different school, and we texted constantly. We decided to date and he came back to town and things just...fell flat. Everything I felt while we texted or talked on the phone wasn't there in person.
So I have got to say, this is a wonderful fan fiction. I love it. Thank you so, so much for writing and sharing.
Yep, I've been there as well, my friend. Specifically the bit with Mac and Fluttershy.
Not bad story..... what i expected:
its not going to bad..... what really happened: 
I think twilight might have a real big crush on big mac and shes trying to stall him
I can't even muster the words to say how awesome this was. But if I could, it would end with "...All of that and not a single word of out of character narration."
Well done, you glorious bastard.
we need to see that walk home
The feels
why oh why is there so much feels
Reminds me of a story I read a while back that was a series of letters between Twilight and Rainbow, but in reverse order so you see the tragedy play out backwards. You see what results from the event, and start to piece the past together as the letters go back in time. You then get to the last(first) letter, and everything hits you at once. So, if anyone else wants a really emotional story told through letters, give I Miss You a shot.
one of the best romantic stories i have read
and you totally got me dammit
at this part
i was losing my mind, i was so sure it would be Twilight but nope, you just pulled a good one
thanks for writing this one, it was a great story
sequels?
P.S. holy **** you also wrote "But You Surpass Them All", how come i haven't followed you before
As many before me have said (or agreed with the sentiment of it):
You glorious fucking bastard.
I hate you.
Please write more.
Ow, you got me, right in the feels.
One minor nitpicky detail however, is that in the first letter, Mac mentions Cherry Jubilee; Cherry Jubilee is from Dodge Junction, not Apploosa.
A few letters in:
"Okay, this hinting is painfully obvious. Mac isn't being subtle, Twi. Figure it out before I hurt my brain reading more."
A few more letters:
"He might as well have hired RD to sky-write 'Twilight I love you.' I didn't even think this COULD be more obvious."
The dance:
Also, I've determined I am just a complete sucker for this form of storytelling. I've yet to find one in this style I didn't enjoy.
3303756
Better yet, don't get into this situation!
3303975
I tend not to like letter stories either, but I don't think it's anything inherent to the format; it's that most writers don't do them correctly. I do a lot of reviewing and constantly blast authors for doing them wrong, so I figured it was time to see if I could live up to my own advice. This isn't really the place to go into much detail, but some common mistakes are giving too much irrelevant physical description, including too much quoted dialogue, and using too many speech tics. These just aren't things that people actually put in letters (or journals, for that matter). You really have to put yourself in the character's place and decide what would actually be reasonable to write in that situation, not just take a regular story and shoehorn it into letters because it sounded like a neat idea. A good example of doing it right is Thanqol's Yours Truly.
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Sorry, no sequel. This is one of those situations I think is more effective to leave open-ended. Imagine however you'd like to see it play out. They grow apart? Find their friendship again? Something more? Whatever you like.
3307242
Shit. You're right.
If this story has a flavor it will be bitter sweet.
And a sprinkle of feels.
3307559
indeed it is, i just figured asking wouldn't hurt
as for letter stories this was the third that i have enjoyed and loved, the first was weirdly enough "Yours Truly" its such an amazing piece, and it even got me to try and incorporate letters in my real life
"In Memory Of" by Obselescence is another amazing letter story, yours was third, but if i may, i know of one that is somewhat a special mention, "We´ll Keep In Touch" it mixes letters with story telling and its such a sweet TwiDash story 
Awesome.... -flails-
3307559
So leaving up to the reader? i like that
That was AWESOME
I'd ask for MOAR but this story should stand as it is.
Instead I will simply ask that you write more stories like it.
We must feed the changelings the feels!
~CaspianSK
I love it.
You know, I wasn't going to fave until that twist with Fluttershy. It just didn't seem like there was enough substance at first to be anything more than a pleasant but average shipfic. Then, wham. You really brought everything together perfectly. Once again I'm quite impressed. Twice now you've floored me. That's easily enough for me to want to know when you might next do it again. Have a follow.
Wow.
I loved this story. I don't know what more can be said than that.
Amazing work!
I loved the subtleties of the writing, like the salutations. You clearly put a lot of thought into this story, and it shows through quite clearly. It's been a long time since a story hit me like this emotionally, and I needed it. Thanks.