Story Reviews » Round Robin Reviews # 9 · 5:27pm Jun 28th, 2016
The Round Robin Reviews are written by different groups and reviewers taking turns each week. If you are a story reviewer or part of a group that reviews stories and would be interested in joining the Round Robin Reviews, feel free to PM me (Wanderer D), Professor Plum, or ElDorado to tell us about it.
We at the PCaRG pride ourselves on being serious, diligent reviewers who provide quality feedback and accurate representations of the stories we read, such that authors can take our advice and improve their own works.
Our group has a five-tiered rating system for stories, though individual reviewers have the freedom to make their own adjustments to the system to fit their style. Our categories are as follows:
Masterpiece: The best of the best.
Must Read: Excellent stories, though just not quite perfect.
Recommended: Good stories, though they have some room for improvement.
Enjoyable: Workable stories that need some polishing.
Needs Work: Stories that need some TLC.
And now, let’s get down to the reviews themselves. For this edition of the Round Robin we’ve selected four stories for you to add to your reading lists. Without further ado, let's dive in!
Romance
by Timaeus
Reviewed by Jack of a Few Trades
Group Rating: Must Read
Twilight’s Kingdom was probably one of the more eventful two-part episodes in the show’s history. We witnessed probably the most epic battle the show will ever give us, the Golden Oaks library was destroyed and replaced by a magical toy setcastle, the princesses were defeated, and the list goes on and on. With so many life-changing events transpiring in such a short amount of time, it was bound to have some major emotional tolls on a lot of ponies.
Perhaps none more than Twilight herself.
Everchanging explores the emotional stresses that such an episode would put on the characters. In this story, Twilight suffers an emotional breakdown, and it’s up to Applejack to come and save the day.
There are no real aspects of this story that I would call poorly done, but I believe the strongest point of this story is the characterization. Applejack takes on the role of consoling Twilight and helping her cope with the situation in such a genuine, nurturing, Applejack way, and the story follows a very strong flow which is almost entirely driven by conversation between the characters. It is so beautifully handled that I cannot recommend it enough.
Reviewed by FamousLastWords
Group Rating: Must Read
The idea of this story is that color is sucked away from the world, depriving happiness and motivation from the land. This has horrible effects on Dash, much to Twilight's dismay.
The mood in this story was on point. It was meant to portray how lifeless a world without hope would be, and the writing style captured that perfectly. It felt bland, but emotionally vibrant, which is exactly what the author was going for.
I was blown away. The morals and sub-messages in this story are wonderful, and I feel it directly relates to the lives of many people, trying to get by in a world that can be lifeless and lonely at times. It's worth a read for anyone who would like to see a different perspective of the world. It really shows how something as simple as the colors we take for granted every day can completely change our outlook on the beauty of life.
Sad
by Rinnaul
Reviewed by Seventh Heaven
Group Rating: Recommended
I know what you're thinking. "Oh boy, another Pinkamena story. Like we don't have enough of those!". Normally, I would agree with that sentiment. I don't consider myself a fan of Pinkamena stories, but this one was different. Whereas many stories starring the depressed pink pony rely on a shock factor to get you to read them, this one is written in such a way that that's not necessary. When you first start reading, you'll notice the most striking feature of the story: The complete lack of dialogue.
Rather, the story is told through the mind of Pinkamena. Left with her thoughts, the reader is taken on quite the emotional journey. A journey that some of us can relate to. Depression. The entire story focuses on that one topic, but the author does a good job of sling-shotting you around in her mind. You aren't left to contemplate one of her thoughts for long before you're on to the next. It's a very realistic way of putting you in the head of a deranged and sad individual, and I applaud the author for doing it so well.
To close things off, I'd like to say that the author has a very good grasp of English, and there are very few mistakes worth noting. The story is a length that doesn't drag on too long, but it also doesn't leave you wanting more, which is perfect. The idea of having the entire story take place in her head was also a welcome twist to a common trope, and it was done very well.. All in all, I'd recommend that you read this if you're ever in the mood for something sad. You won't be disappointed.
Dark
Reviewed by Asilin
Group Rating: Masterpiece
One of the biggest challenges in writing is the Alternate Universe. Whether spinning off of reality or fandom canon, the AU story has to not only convince us that the story, plot, and characters are solid, but that the setting, that the divergence itself, is plausible.
“The New Crop” is an example of a story that pulls this off in spades.
The story itself follows a down-on-its-luck Apple family with a focus on the first person narrator Big Mac. The family itself is down to Big Mac, Granny Smith, and Applebloom, and generations of bad luck have left them with no choice but having Big Mac fight in the boxing ring. Tonight’s fight is against Blueblood for a prize of two thousand bits.
Why are they left in this position? Well, instead of settling in Ponyville, the Apple family went to Appleloosa instead. Reading as someone who doesn’t particularly watch the show, the way this information is presented (which is in the first chapter, so, no, it’s not a spoiler) is not only smoothly done, but feels immensely logical. I was informed by Rinnaul that this also has a basis in show canon, which makes it even more plausible. The hardest part of the AU is taken care of supremely well within four to five paragraphs. Just the handling of the exposition there is worth the read.
But even without the well-crafted backstory, I would still highly recommend this tale. And that is simply for the voice. Big Mac’s voice in this tale just sells it from the opening line to the end. At no point did I think we weren’t listening to Big Mac. Even as a non-brony, I began to identify the speaker within the first few paragraphs. His voice, his pain, his determination, draws you into the story and keeps you there.
After that, everything else is just as well crafted. Descriptions are concrete and wonderfully crafted to voice and situation. The narrative flows seamlessly from depictions of the fight to Big Mac’s musings and flashbacks and back again. Even if boxing isn’t your thing, you find yourself immensely invested in the outcome of this fight, hanging on every punch, every call, every bell for the victor to be declared. And while the plot isn’t much - the chapter headers are the story in a nutshell (hint: it’s the fight) - it does exactly what it needs to: provide the frame for the emotional story of a family that’s just looking for a break.
That’ll do it for this edition. Be sure to check out these fine stories, and we hope to see you all next time!
Given that the Round Robin Reviews are disseminated to a larger audience who may not subscribe to the individual groups doing the reviews or even know they exist, I'd suggest spelling out the group name the first time you use it. I just see "PCaRG" and have no idea what it stands for. The only reason I could figure it out was by looking at one of the "original review" links. And I think that lies with the group providing the review to check. It's not up to site staff to proofread for that kind of thing, nor would they really care; it's just costing the group potential publicity.
4053957 The Pleasant Commentator and Review Group
This is seriously the harshest rating you guys would give by default?
4055833 Well, they don't say how much work it needs ;) But seriously, this thing is essentially random people reviewing whatever, and not an author's request, so no reason to get harsh. Besides, the whole scale is off. Most "must reads" aren't, nor are most masterpieces masterpieces. It's just a scale that translates to highly recommended, recommended, read if you like this genre, read if you really like the genre, and don't bother.
Colourless looks pretty cool. I think I'll definitely be giving that one a read.
Can I also ask: How would I submit a story I've finished/am working on for reviewing? Or is it just a case of you picking what you finding interesting and talking about it? Do you have a rules page about this sort of thing?
4055833
Yes and no. The rating is general, and it always should be, and I'll admit, our rating system does needs work...I'm not ashamed
That is not to be underestimated by some harsh reviews we have given. Anyway, Dark Avenger, how have you been?