That rape of Northern Lights was awesome. Being raped in both her tailhole and pussy while the third was going balls deep in her throat? Too bad she was killed though.

Is it wrong that this coming out was the highlight of my day?

Loving this already

Why am I even reading this?

Why are the griffons so over powered in this?

i still dont think the griffons could win, i mean celestia raises the sun, the fucking sun. what do the griffons have talons and bigger dicks i just dont see it

saw your authors note, im glad derpy will not be harmed since shes cool but once again if fluttershy is harmed you must sit at your door with a shotgun pointed at it for the rest of your life

2388758>>2389136

Physically, griffons are bigger than ponies. They have larger wings, and (at least according to my fics), live up north in the mountains, in much colder and thinner air. Thus, they would have an advantage in raw strength and stamina over ponies.

Can Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and (maybe?) Cadence defeat a griffon? Yes, they COULD. But let's look back at the show so far (as I try to keep my fics as canon as possible);

Every problem Equestria has faced isn't really solved by any of the princesses. Nightmare Moon is back? Better send the mane 6. Oh no, Discord is free. Send the mane 6. Yes, with the crystal empire Cadence and Shining went first, but they just stalled until Twilight and her friends got there. Plus the almighty Celestia WAS defeated by the Changeling Queen 1 vs 1...

My point being, even the most powerful pony (or 3 or 4) cannot save an entire nation. They can only be in one place at a time. And don't say magic can defeat anything... there are still rules and laws magic has to follow.

Also, talons.

2391481 Looking back to the show the Griffons are only slightly larger then the ponies. Not to mention I doubt they would be much stronger. Muscle is heavy and flight requires them to be light. I agree that they are stronger, but I think earth ponies would win the strength fight.

Dragon alleys though... that's just fucked up.

Still going to read obviously.

Brony on!

2392139

Crap... that's two people I now may have to worry about...

2388758 Seriously, arm the ponies with metal blades. There's a reason we feeble humans kicked the crap out of every other animal on this planet: SHARP TOOLS ARE MORE EFFECTIVE THAN NATURAL CLAWS AND TEETH. Sharpened steel slices through claws with ease. Claws are nothing but large, thick fingernails, after all.

Add in simple projectile weapons and it's game over.

Plus, as I see a few others have noted, the griffons depend on their larger wings for flight. This means they don't have the level of inherent magic the pegasi do (pegasi could never fly with those tiny wings. NEVER.). The griffons need to be built lighter.

And finally, their entire race just suddenly turned into sadistic rapist/murderers just because they have a bad leader now?

2392440 I expected something better then this I EXPECTED BACON all in all is good

2393581

Fine...

The ponies all arm themselves with spears and don armor, fending off the griffon advance and kill hundreds of griffons, ending the war. The end.

Yeah, great fucking story that way.

2391481
i guess thats logical, didnt really look at it that way

just don't hurt rain- oh wait.... yeah.... fuck ......
anyways,what an awesomely bloody story! messed up though..... i remember when the fire in her eyes used to be just that oe chapter with 'you' raping rainbowdash.... it was so innocent then lol
anyways, keep going! but don't make everypony die ..... please

2393753 With a little forethought, one can conceive of battle which doesn't rely on elevating one particular side to overpowered contrivance, nor weakening and dumbing down the other to near helplessness.

Simply put, Equestria would not be a happy fairy land of magic and flowers if they had a neighboring realm with a history of savagery.

Altering the tone of nation which interacts with the other then results in changes to the international and social dynamics of the present.

This is often overlooked in dark and grimdark fanfictions.

2396931

With a little forethought, one can conceive of battle which doesn't rely on elevating one particular side to overpowered contrivance, nor weakening and dumbing down the other to near helplessness.

Ugh, was hoping to avoid any spoilers...

So far there have been no actual battles between the two armies. If you notice, the griffons are avoiding outright confrontation, instead they are settling for guerrilla warfare. Notice that in the 1 on 1 fight in ch 2, Spitfire won. No side holds a 'overpowering' advantage over the other, just one side is fighting dirtier than the other.

2395685

i remember when the fire in her eyes used to be just that oe chapter with 'you' raping rainbowdash.... it was so innocent then lol

They grow up so fast, don't they?

And they won't all die... there wouldn't be any pony left to rape if I did that.

2397154 Well, to put this in perspective, at least so far it's not nearly as bad as "The Secret Life of Rarity" (I suffered through 5 chapters and the end before the hatriol of its awfulness made me go berserk with frothing fury), which breaks the boundaries of utter absurdity from about the first quarter of chapter 1 and onward.

Your story looks to me a little unbalanced, what with the ponies not already experienced in warfare against the clearly violent griffons (deviation from the two canonical griffons we've seen, indicating a need to darken the ponies respectively and add details of a long antagonism and uneasy truce), but it's certainly better than a poorly plotted, unrealistic, pseudopsychological character assassination.

Uhm... ok, so that wasn't really a good comparison... The level of difference is like the difference between... sewage and top-quality compost. I dunno if that even makes sense.

I don't know why I'm still here. ah well, hope ray gets his face torn off

2403242

I think 90-95% of the people following this want to see if/how Ray is beaten and/or killed.

...would suck if he lived.

And no, that's not a guarantee or spoiler. As of now, when I get to the last chapter in this, his fate will be decided by either a coin flip or vote... not sure which yet.

79 Favorites yet only 39 likes?

2389169

So... working on the ch 3... couldn't help but scrap my original plans and instead throw in Fluttershy.

Don't worry, she just talks with Princess Celestia about caring for animals.

Or... at least so far. I'm only 1,300 words into the chapter.

ray must die else you will have to watch your back...

Still not sure if it's great that this was a dream and it all came to you as a idea in your head meh. It's a good story however

2413429

Just the first chapter in the prequel to this was the dream.

... yeah, that's still bad.

2405597...What?! Fluttershy?! YOU FIEND! How...What...How can... *sits in computer chair, opening and closing mouth uselessly, like a Magikarp, unable to type more words*

I feel like "Chapter 1" Should've been a prologue, and this would have been Chapter 1.
And to make it infinitely more epic, I feel that you could've taken out that last little scene with Fancypants and replaced the last line with
But seeing her so calm and so quiet after fighting for her life and killing… what scared him the most... was the fire in her eyes.
But that's just me XD

2392440

Three

I got an idea to make this story more interesting! Celestia calls the humans in equestria for help, which are locked up in Vaults for their own safety (kind of like fallout). The humans have advanced technology (like vehicles) And their tasks are to kill dragons and snipe key targets

It would be epic if you made it end with like an epic dual between ray and the main character!

Gryphons Rape Everyone: The Story.

Really though, it's becoming somewhat... Repetitive. It's still good, don't get me wrong, but...

2460518

It is, isn't it... that's one of the reasons why ch 3 is taking so long. I was about 4k words into it when I realized that it's the same old thing over and over and over and over... so I scrapped everything and started over, trying to take another approach. I'm a bit happier with what I have so far, but I would still love to hear input from my readers as my ideas are dwindling.

2462127
Pony on gryphon rape.

Seeing as how it's now full-on war (and hearing tales of how they treated Rainbow Dash), even the ponies can't resist having their fun.

2405597
dont forget what I said earlier, i dont give a damn if any other pony is hurt, killed, raped, or whatever but fluttershy is off fucking limits. but i liked derpy's input in second chapter, hope things get better in boston for you since so far you becoming my favorite writer

People you are forgetting one tiny thing about the whole don armor and spears that requires resources and mining for minerals to make that material. Hell during WWII we (US) were actually draining the entire nation for war looking anywhere we could for resources. We mostly resorted to using enemy weapons and anything soldiers could get a hold of on the pacific front.

Another thing is the 4 gods just smiting Their asses. Since from what I can tell gorilla warfare is being used they can only be in one place at a time. Hell I wouldn't be surprised one chapter some type of explosive blows canterlot to kingdom come.

Also note on Ray (odd name but whatev) he's like the governer from walking dead at this point. (comic one tv one sucks) he also reminds me of Edward Richtofen from nazi zombies. Both characters I hate yettttt oddly enough well want them to win. (call me a sick bastard but would be much more interesting to have that instead of a entire sad don bluth movie with a really happy ending) I expect a batman ending to this dark but also a victory. (My guess is "you" dies as twilight finally says that thing talked about in fire in her eyes for the massive irony) hell I see ray getting away with this walking Dead S3 finale style.

Anyway enough reading my insanity on with reading the story

Oh and another thing this is WAR not the whole rape thing in a castle for months thing anymore. Make these bastards get sick you don't need rape to make them sick as hell. I suggest torturing and something like electroshock among many many other fucked up ways you can destroy a person mental well being. Hell show one gryphon not able to do the sick shit and just executed right then in there for being weak.

Pretty much. M A K E T H E M N A Z I S

Also it seems the gryphons are all tough and bad, but when they are realizing their mortality like every human does in a situation of this kind they beg for their life an plead. also spitfire is becoming one of them as niche said he who fights monsters must ensure in the process that they don't become a monster themselves. Also one other thing don't have rapes every chapter. Yes that's the point but I've been on a marathon reading your story (very well made by the way) and well the rape is getting old every chapter. If it happens every time theirs no significance to or anything at stake it's just the norm. Try to save the rape for character vital moments like for instance spitfire encounters one of her captors (not ray ofc) and straight up tortures him maybe going so far as doing public torturing. Remember this is WAR now. there's no holding back give it all you got. make us fear both the ponies and gryphons hell maybe even make us sympathetic by showing maybe a gryphons city life to make us feel what they endure. (I imagine ray as hitler killing all who are not deemed perfect) or maybe introduce Gilda in as a spy or rouge that spit fire has trouble trusting and nearly kills her when she first shows up.

2463799

Favorite writer?

As for Boston, things are finally quiet. I'm still extremely pissed that one of my brothers in blue was slain by those fuckers... he better hope I don't find a way to get him alone for even a few minutes.

------------------------

Work on chapter 3 is going slow still, I'm afraid. Work is at least lifting up a little, so I actually got a few hundred more words pumped out the last few nights. Yeah, still not a lot, but it's getting there. I may release ch 3 earlier than I want to just to get SOMETHING out there.

Only thing I want to see at the end of this, is that Rainbow Dash gets her revenge. She's my favorite and after what she endured, she deserves revenge.

Captain Ray likes to touch his nipples every time he hears the door... Just saying

can't wait for the next chapter!

2472981

you can't prove that...

2460518

I love the part when the Griffions Hijack the train.

The part in my perspective

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=godn_ujvzjw

The Rock: Anybody you want

Big Show,Kane,Undertaker: The Griffions

LOL TheCamel should Name the 3 that name

2467107
well i just hope its as good as your other works. and your possibly my favorite writer because of the rape stories, thats just pretty cool you do thing others dont like to

2483797

Roar... says the griffon

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMQrGUtLHqs&list=UUshN_W43KLn8t2Gg6uWgljw&index=99

So... Ponies vs. Griffons.

Griffons:
-Claws
-Beaks
-Bows and Arrows
-Swords?
-Shields?
-Spears?
-Size
-Numbers?
-Strength
-Dragons

Ponies:
-Magic
-The Royal Guard
-Four Alicorns
-Two GODS
-Fighting on home turf
-Weather control (Seriously, just send a lightning storm their way)
-Control of the sun and moon
-The Elements of Harmony.

I'd like to say it seems like a fair fight but...

2388758
Yeah, the only thing that can stop them is a bat queen

2485988 You can't use the home turf thing, the Alamo was the Homefield Advantage. So were the Ottomans and the Carthaginians. They ALL died.