• Member Since 25th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Yukito


Trixie and Twilight are best ponies! (Diamond Tiara is best filly :D )

Comments ( 26 )

Wow, not a single view before me and it already got downvoted?
Some people need to grow up. Here, have a thumbs up. I liked it.

I haven't read it yet, But I give it a up vote
the concept sounds good, plus this author has written some good stories in the past

Well it's not bad, but it's not that great either. The story feels rushed and has little substance to it. The clop is . . . somewhat adequate at best. Again, though it feels rushed and kind of ends too quickly. Also, never use words such as pussy or other vulgar words. Use words like marehood or lower lips. Just don't use words like pussy or penis. But what really sinks this story to me is the fact that we know nothing about why Cadence loves Chrysalis, or how they came together. Also there should've been some reaction from Shining Armor on this whole matter. Maybe that threesome in your Author's Note wouldn't be a bad idea since Cadence is so torn between him and Chrysalis. I don't know if this is your first time writing clop, but I suggest reading a few to get some pointers.

Not that bad of a story idea, but it needs some help.

Well... not too bad, here. I've never written clop, but I think you did well. Nice twist here, too.

I don't even know what you're doing Yukito.

Still, I said you couldn't write something bad so let's see...

*After*

Alright. It wasn't great but good, so upvote. :twilightsmile:

1881766

:trixieshiftright: - "Something tells the Great and Powerful Trixie that Twilight won't work as a virgin sacrifice..."
:twilightblush:

1881980

Just wanted to try my hoof at writing clop. If it helps, I don't have any plans for writing more. Really don't think I'm cut out for it ^_^;;

this is a master piece

1881983

Yup, that seems legit. :moustache:

Okay it was good

The idea is good, the fact that it is clop is just that... a fact.

Admittably there is much better, and since this really is mostly clop the action should be better, but you brought about a new pairing (I expect three more from others in 23 days) and this could be worked into a story. If this was just a small part of a story that focuses on the actual plot the quality would actually be good.

All in all it got a thumbs up.

Oh yeah, I plan on trying to find a story where Chrysalis actually loves Shining Armor. I have an idea and want to know if it's original. If anyone could point one out I would be thankful.:raritywink:

“You were saying?”

I always have a bit of a shiver when I imagine Chrysalis saying that//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_bedroomeyes.png

I am neutral on this pairing. :applejackunsure::eeyup::unsuresweetie:

so are you going to make any more clopfics like a twixie clopfic

Reminds me of when my class and I were reading 'of mice and men' and I made a crazy response to the legalization of prostitution by saying that people can worship the sin of lust if they want to

Very nice. A little short, but nice. Thumbs up. And you now what, take a fav to.:twilightsmile:

Why the hell isn't there more of this pairing?!:flutterrage:

I was loving it until she called Cadence "Cady"
Then I started thinking "Caddy Shack" and my battleship was sunk.
Still, I loved it.

Finally actually read this, and I have to say, its amazing just how much better your Twixie clopfic is.

Its mostly the swears, words like pussy are just horrible to me. But whats fun about looking back on things like this is to see just how much you have improved, and take it from me, the difference between this and the Twixie Clopfic is startling!

This is also rife with errors. Dunno if you'd be bothered coming back to fix them but I suggest giving it a read over again if you are bored sometime.

5 AM in the morning and I obviously had nothing better to do than reading clop with unusual parings on my phone while laying in bed...

Either way, definitely enjoyed and its shortness was just welcoming!

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