In the far future young girls listen as their mother tells them the story of "Beauty and the Beast, " but with a slight twist...
This is my first attempt at Sparity shipping as this story would be like, and maybe a start for me to try to finish the storyline for once.
Also the Song in this story is: Read me a story," which was sung by Carrol Spinney (Big Bird) and Fran Brill (Zoe) of Sesame Street.
I do not own any of these things besides the storyline itself as they are the products of Hasbro and Sesame Workshop. They came from the minds of Jim Henson and Lauren Faust respectively.
Chapters (1)
No views or ratings?
I shall go on an adventure!
... Yeah... needs a lot of work.
Really dislike the heavy use of bold. Hurts the eyes.
1610697 I suspect that wasn't intended. I believe it was a coding error when trying to bold only the song.
It's cute and a nice read, but it would benefit from some length. Also, you need to fix the coding error with the bolds.
1611591
If you could tell me how, then I'll try to fix it.
Also the next one-shot will short of explain things a bit in this tale.
1611681 Well usually you have a [ b ] without a [ /b ] minus the spaces.
“Well the knight and the maiden friends still loved her and the knight fell in loved with the transformed maiden, and with one kiss, he too sacrificed himself to become a monster as well,” stated the mother.
...does that mean what I think it means?
If so, then I say bravo for the clever little twist.
I really like this, it's sweet. But I don't really understand why she's so worried at the end there, did I miss something. Also, if you're still having trouble with your coding errors I can try and fix them for you if you send me the story. :D
Okay. This was an interesting concept.
I would have liked to see more detail in the events leading up to the part where the children are picked on. I would have also liked to have seen exactly why the children are picked on. I know that Rarity and Spike are the parents, but what makes them different from normal ponies? Or dragons? Do they have spikes on their bodies? Those are questions I would have loved to seen answered.
The coding errors have been address multiple times so I won't be too harsh, but they do need to be fixed and someone on the website can help. I'd be happy to help. I suck at them, but I'd still be willing to try.
The story was pretty interesting. And I would have loved to see it go more in-depth and show more of the journey. Like how the knight became friends with the dragon, what was their first encounter, what kind of struggles did the two face? I would have loved to see more of that. I don't know if your other stories go into detail with that, but I would love to see that.
A sweet tale. Again, I would love to see more and I hope you do more, because I think you've got good ideas and I would love to see you grow as a writer. Thanks for letting me read it and I'll catch you later. Take care.