Twilight just wanted to introduce more of her friends to Moondancer, while on a visit to Canterlot.
Little did she know that she had already met Trixie. And that there was a lot of animosity left between them.
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Luminous Comet
Joined 20th Jul, 2022 ·
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Interesting pairing, and some great comedic beats.
I always thought moondancer would have better taste than that 🤣
11492797
Only in books.
11492797
🤣
11492953
I know right 🤣.
11492878
Hence why both she and Twilight will die a virgin.
Honestly, the alicorn amulet incident wasn't that bad as far as ponyville goes. Like, it's up there but I don't think it makes the top 5 worst disasters.
11493024 Oh, God . . . What a horrible fate!
11493092 Probably because there's a monster attack practically every week, to the point where the characters talk about it as if they're talking about the weather.
Oh my goodness! I'm in love with this story and how you wrote it!!
The pairing between Moondancer and Trixie is unconventional, and not really thought of, but it should be written more, and if it is to be written more, then it must take a page from your fic here! I really do enjoy somewhat toxic pairings like these two, both of them were egomaniacs when they were together, so it's hard to imagine their relationship being held together very strongly. When Trixie speaks of 'winning' the break-up, it really reflects on her mindset regarding relationships, that is, she would view being with Moondancer as a 'win' as well. Moondancer seemed to be dependent on Trixie, very supportive of her, but still kind of clinging to her like a piece of wood in an ocean. Without each other, they had nothing, and that isn't healthy. But, this isn't to talk down to your writing or insult it! Rather, I want to commend you for writing in such a way that I could pick all of this up!
More than this, switching scenes back and forth between Trixie and Twilight, and Moondancer and Starlight, was a really smart decision, and it not only helped to keep the pacing of the story up, but it provided a great comedic tempo as well! All of these aspects were only sharpened by the natural way in which everypony was written! Wonderful work!!
11493120
Thank you so much! I'm always a bit worried whether I get across what I want, or whether my comedy lands, so this kind of feedback is extremely encouraging!
And thank you also for taking the time to write detailed feedback, this means a lot to me.
11493134
I'm very glad!! You ought to be encouraged, and you ought to be proud of your work! This is a fic that felt so natural, and concluded so perfectly, that it could easily be mistaken for an actual episode of the show, or a short spin-off clip! I hope to read much more from you!
I'm curious... when in the show's timeline did you envision Moondancer and Trixie's relationship to be? Was it before the first episode of the show, or after, like around the time of Boast Busters or Magic Duel?
11493441
It was before Trixie started touring, so definitely before Boast Busters. Probably not too long before, so perhaps right before the start of the series?
11493543
Now the really interesting question:
How would Trixie take being Moony's rebound relationship?
11493543
That was my most likely guess.
I should also say this is a cute fic, and it's incredibly entertaining to see how each of these three unicorns with their own special connection to Twilight Sparkle play off each other. It also feels extremely Twilight for her to methodically plan a trip where Starlight makes friends with Moondancer.
11493989
Starlight keeps befriending the few ponies who habitually wear clothes, so this does indeed feel inevitable.
Awwwww, they worked it out. I hope they got all that regret and bitterness out in the open so they can heal together. Doesn't need to be romantic, even. How sweet
Really loved the idea but the rest kind of predictably and I didn't feel like I got the whole context and image.
Dang you wrote this in January? This would've been beautiful for the may pairings contest^^"
But amazing job with the characterizations and story nonetheless!
Delightful and surprisingly believable pairing, and an even more believable reason for their messy breakup. And I do love Twilight as an irrepressible Platonic matchmaker. In all, brilliant little character piece. Thank you for it.
Not a pairing I ever expected to see, but you really make it work. This was really solid. n_n
I like this. Integrating into my head canon.