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criticalmess 51119

Joined April 2012
483 followers

    criticalmess's Stories (5)

    • Want Me, Need Me, Love Me
      Twilight Sparkle becomes a changeling and soon finds her metamorphosis doesn't only affect her.

      22,191 words · 11,791 views · 1,343 likes · 20 dislikes
    • The Sordid Truth
      Twilight Sparkle finds a book by Clover the Clever on Princess Celestia that changes her forever
      5,404 words · 11,875 views · 1,195 likes · 30 dislikes
    • After the Sun
      Nightmare Moon's return leaves her weakened, and is drawn to Twilight and the darkness in her heart
      17,502 words · 1,482 views · 155 likes · 2 dislikes
    • Pantheon
      Twilight is pulled into a future where her friends have become powerful enemies
      7,473 words · 433 views · 26 likes · 0 dislikes
    • A Millennium of Eternal Night
      8,171 words · 522 views · 39 likes · 3 dislikes
    Source

    As Twilight Sparkle awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, she found she had been turned into a changeling.

    How has she become a changeling? How will she adapt? How will her friends respond? And what new terrors will her metamorphosis bring?

    Cover image by the fantastic Carnifex... or Siansaar... I can't tell which. You can find more wonderful works here: http://siansaar.deviantart.com/

    EDIT: Featured... nearing 1000 Favorites... multiple pages of comments (swoons)

    Thanks for everything guys. I never expected this thing to get so popular. I need to rework the second chapter, but it looks like there's going to be a blue moon every Friday for a while yet. Thanks again for your support and please keep reading and reviewing!

    EDIT2: I've updated the character list again, a little preview of the second story arc...

    First Published
    7th Sep 2012
    Last Modified
    10th Oct 2012

    Comments ( 829 )

    #1 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    the curl of purple replaced by the heavy weight of a had atop her head     I think that should be hat

    This looks promising, not going to fave yet, but if the next chapter is this good I will.

    #2 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    AWSOME

    #3 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Enjoy that thumb-up. :D And my fave-track, too. :D

    #4 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    A new Twilight, Changeling story. This looks interesting, looking forward to Chapter 1 :heart:.

    #6 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    thats 6 layers there http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUDjnbOJcdg&feature=player_detailpage

    #7 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Love it :yay:

    Tracked :rainbowkiss:

    Don't disappoint :ajbemused:

    #8 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    I think this is just me nitpicking, but why would a hat appear on Twilight when she changes into AJ? The hat isn't a physical part of her. Very good though. Will be tracking :twilightsheepish:

    #9 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Twilight is best Changeling! Glad to see another Twi=Changeling story. I like the sequence of nightmares.

    Also, have a fav and an upvote. Take them!

    #10 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1236211

    The changeling queen could produce a dress out of nowhere (cadence in the cave had one, and i assume rarity would have noticed a dress going missing) and it disappears when she changes back, so i assume mimicking some clothing is possible

    After checking, the changelings in the actual episode that copy AJ also end up with hats. what happens when you try to take these away from them is anyones guess.

    #11 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1236365 Good point. I forgot about that :twilightsheepish:

    #12 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    INCEPTION MADNESS!!! :derpyderp1::derpyderp2::derpyderp1::derpyderp2::derpyderp1::derpyderp2:

    #13 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    That made absolutely no sense but I loved it :trollestia:

    #14 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    OMG, MOAR PLEAAAASE:raritycry:

    This is the best opening for a fic of this type I have ever seen!

    #15 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    A never ending nightmare... yeah that would cause me to freak out too. Unending... when do you trust reality and when do you know it's all a dream.

    #16 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    :pinkiehappy:

    Looks great!  Keep up good work.

    #17 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    I'm sorry...but I'm still laughing my ass off at the dream within a dream bit. I know it was probably supposed to be super creepy, stressful, terrifying, and help us become one with Twilight's torment...but I just couldn't stop laughing at how ridiculous it was! Haha! Keep up the good work!

    #18 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Now, all you have to do is update more then once every blue moon.

    #19 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Continue. I expect great things out of this. :trixieshiftright:

    #20 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    No Twilight, you are the changelings

    And then Twilight was a changelings. :twilightoops:

    Interesting to see which direction this goes.  Will Twilight accept her new self and turn all her friends (or at least Pinkie Pie :pinkiehappy:) into changelings as well?  Are all her friends already changelings, along with Spike, all of 'Pony'ville, and the pool where they were relaxing?  Will they all toss her out and leave her broken only to reveal that it was just another changeling-induced nightmare and that she is still stuck in that cocoon?  

    Waiting for the next exciting update.

    #21 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    The "layered nightmares" bit went on for a *little* too long, but besides that this is great.

    You especially nailed Twi's mounting horror when she starts randomly transforming; I could almost hear her starting to cry.

    tracked and liked, will likely fave.

    #22 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    omg this is so amazing! MORE!!!:flutterrage:

    #23 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Interesting... It's like Mirror Image crossed with that-other-Twilight-changeling-story-whose-name-I-can't-remember. I like it.

    #24 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1236947 I hope it will be that!

    #25 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Not quite a full meh, but we'll see where this goes before I start shooting.

    #26 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Has potential, especially with your skills. However, one thing: when I was reading the beginning of this chapter, through all the nightmares, it eventually reached a point where I thought, "did this person mistake the 'dark' tag for 'comedy?' :ajbemused:" Might think about revising that, because after the first few times it just starts getting ridiculous.

    #27 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    I do look forward to the next chapter of this.

    #28 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    why doesnt she jsut change into herself?

    #29 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1237264 She does, for a bit. All of the changes she goes through are accidental; she has no idea herself what's happening, or why.

    #30 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Okay, this is DEFINITELY going on my e-mail list. :pinkiehappy: Well done!

    #31 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    And then Twilight has the biggest mental breakdown in history...again.

    #32 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1237349 how is this not a comedy? well i guess comedy is tragedy+time

    #33 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    moar moar moar moar moar!!!!!!!!!!! NOW:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage: please?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    #34 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1237389 Wrong person. I think you were meaning to reply to this one: >>1237184 unless I've gotten one or both of your statements confused.

    #35 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    So is this continuing or are you gonna be a fag and stop writing? :unsuresweetie:

    #36 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1237264, she just became a changeling, she doesn't know how to change into herself yet:ajbemused:

    #37 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    So.... was the last part another dream or...?

    #38 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>1237601 No, I think it was real

    #39 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Oh this looks delightfully dark. Hm, what is truth and what is fiction?

    #40 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    ...more?

    #41 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Looks pretty good - I'll be keeping an eye on this, I'm a sucker for "X is a changeling!" stories. Though, as others have mentioned, the sheer number of dreams does begin to get out of hand.

    #42 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    All those dream layers... we must go deeper.

    #43 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    #44 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Those two tags I tend to stay away, but the story is so interesting...hope everything gets okay though in the end.

    #45 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Interesting. Im tracking this.

    #46 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Veeeery interested in this.

    #47 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Privet: Insanity Twilight meter is in the red sir, what do we do?

    Commander: We watch it.

    #48 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    This is amazing.

    Other than that, I can't really summon anything more specific, but you've already done the recursive nightmares to a sufficient depth for me to appreciate the kind of fear that Twilight must be feeling at this moment.

    #49 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    So far this is really interesting. I shall watch this one.

    :coolphoto:

    #50 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Man, those dreams were plain creepy.

    Loving this.  Need more.

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