• Member Since 19th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen May 11th, 2015

GorisTheDeathclaw


Yep.

Comments ( 52 )

Compared to the rest of the fics, you actually manage to spare him from any sufferable consequences :derpytongue2: Still pretty lulz

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

EDIT: That's what you get for not using a shitty euphemism, lamer!

“So…” you nervously suggest. “How about… uh… we go to your bedroom, and, uh.. have sex?” you manage to force the words out.

She narrows her eyes for a moment, and you feel like you’re being analyzed. “Sure! Why not” she chirps up.

That is SOOOO NOT how life works, yo.

Edit: Ok, now that I've read the rest, I understand that this was just for shits and giggles. I laughed pretty hard, and all is well haha. 5 stars for you.

WHAT THE FUCK WAS THIS AND WHY DID I READ IT :facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof:

959610

Read this, stopped reading.

That just doesn't happen. Like ever. If it did, romance as a thing wouldn't be a thing.

So... uh... yeah.

Lulz that was funny

959667

Psst... pro-tip: none of my fics are meant to be taken seriously! They all have a punchline!

Now that I have given you this pro-tip, you are officially IN THE KNOW.

Although if that line is seriously discouraging people from reading on to the punchline, I'm gonna change it.

959746

It implies in an instant that you know basically nothing about pacing to any degree. Granted, I'm not a legend at it, but even so, I'll re-read past it.

But changing it might be an idea. Sorry if I gave you a bad impression of my reading skills.

/me is NOW IN THE KNOW

Captin cock block here! ill be showing you HOW TO FALL ASLEEP INSTANTLY and get! COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCK BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOCKED
lol

Props for writing something original... is what I'd like to say, but sadly, I can't.

There have been quite a few of these "let's make fun of common fanfic fallacies" themed stories around, and it always seems to me like they're missing the point. Making fun of bad writing does not elevate your own writing. Showing meta-awareness is no shortcut to a distinguished work. In all honesty, I could have more respect for a bad second person clopfic if there was genuineness to it, that a fiction satirizing the genre.

Your writing has competence to it, so why don't you try and aim higher? Not everything has to be high prose, but still...

*sees name of author* Alright...what bad thing happens here?

959773
I know in a good romance story it would be like 9999 chapters and 5 million months before the 2 characters had any kind of sexual relationship. But for what's basically 1,000 word long joke... yeah.

959788
These stories are just meant as quick jokes. I'm not really parodying any other 2nd person stories, just trying to make people get a laugh out of some cringe-worthy-ly embarrassing/painful situations (some of which have happened to my friends for real).

And the reason I don't aim higher is because, trust me, I'd end up sucking at it. I've read a lot of genuinely good romance stories from this fandom (I like Of Mares And Magic and the recent Scorched or whatever it was called with Applejack) but I only want to tell jokes, not write some 9,001 word long remake of War and Peace.

959812
Dude, don't sell yourself short. You're a pretty damn good writer.

I say when you're done with these awesomely hilarious oneshots you should try for a real romance. Nothing super long like my stuff, just some oneshots.

Hell I could even help you out if you want.

Keep up the great work. :twilightsmile:

959812

Yes, this was actually the first story of yours that I have read. I just went and read the rest, finally understanding your intention. Honestly, I found the Rarity one pretty funny - his reaction felt actually genuine, and I thought the TURBO-BONER joke was spot on. One could kind of sympathize with the protagonist's frustration, and it felt motivated. Rarity's reaction was believable, even if not 100% in character.

Rainbow - after it was obvious what would happen the comedy was really only dependent on me imagining the scene to be funny - there weren't really any good jokes or dialogue. And yeah, not very funny.

Applejack - Eh... Kind of funny until AJ showed up. She running away crying, because she thought... you were gay? I'd say AJ is made of tougher stuff than to get all crybaby over this. Also the incest joke fell really flat for me.

Pinkie - Again, wrong characterization. It felt like you put a dumb bimbo in Pinkie's body. All her dialogue after the cupcake mishap felt wrong. Also Cthulhu-vagina? Meh...


I stand by what I said, you can aim higher. Maybe put a little more thought into characterization (yes, even for jokes - it will work better, trust me). I can do pre-reading if you'd care for harsh criticism.

959870
:pinkiegasp: I never expected anyone to call me a good writer for writing these joke stories that take like 2 minutes to make... but thanks :twilightsheepish:

959926
Yeah, the Rarity one is a little more realistic than the others, and probably funnier if you don't like the slapstick approach I took to basically all the other ones. But people seem to like the slapstick ones more - the Pinkie one has the most views and favs and that involved prying Pinkie open with a set of pliers... :pinkiesick:

Thanks for the pre-reading offer, but these are just stories I'm writing when I'm bored and I'm probably gonna run out of characters and/or ideas and give up forever pretty soon.

960011
It's not hard to see potential. Your writing style is strong, it seems to me like all you need is a bit more patience.

959746 No! It's the best line ever. Fukken hilarious.

960350
I thought it was pretty funny too in a self-parodying way, but if it's putting people off reading to the punchline then I had to take action.
DECISIVE ACTION. :rainbowdetermined2:

It all seemed rushed. The end wasn't even funny.

And that is what set Spike's expectations for a relationship with Rarity.:moustache:

960425
I've hired a hitman on you for that comment. Don't leave the house.

960427
He's gotta have some pretty low expectations :moustache:

960477 Bitch, I'll leave the house whenever I goddamn please!

960504
That'll kind of throw a metaphorical spanner in the figurative works with my whole hitman plan. I guess he'll just have to wait for you at your house instead.

damn he fucked up xD

Sir frizzy is in sight should I take the shot?

Lol frizzy if you don't like it don't read it end of story

You again. :twilightangry2: This better not end up like your Pinkie Pie story.

Edit: fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/042/e/9/oh_come_on___by_speccysy-d4pcqpm.png

960890
Take the shot. ENSURE THERE ARE NO WITNESSES. :pinkiecrazy:

960891
That's 2 Sweetie Belles that have gotten angry at me over this story. Should I be proud or ashamed?

Don't worry... There won't be:ajbemused:

this happened to my in a nightmare....but with Braeburn:pinkiegasp: no homo

960891 You should see his rarity story, its his best :rainbowlaugh:

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
I hope I'm not the only person who thought of this.

Is this the... Yes, this is him.
images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/Thiswillsurely128437838345575000.jpg
Have another follower... watcher... person... thing, good sir!

I have once again failed another pony. :facehoof: -stallion who dated practically everyone in your storys.

No homo, but I love you man! You sir, are an epic troll! I am so looking forward to reading your other works, past and future! Keep moving forward!:derpytongue2:

Trollfics...god damn TROLLFICS...

DAMN IT.

GOD DAMN IT.

GOD FUCKING DAMN IT.

This had me chuckling, BUT GOD FUCKING GOD DAMN IT.

961106 Well, its funny and all but I'm more into the more romantic type of stories. Not that I like them of course. I just uh, do a lot of stiffled screaming while reading them.

*Steel leans forward and stares at the computer screen with Twilight, who is sitting next to him.*

:twilightsmile: Right off the bat, that cover is nice.

Didn't take you for that kinda mare.

:twilightsheepish: Quiet, you. Even bookworms like me can have a nice figure...

I suppose. Anyway...I've already read this, but I figured I should bring someone else in to the fold to see if they enjoyed it.

:twilightoops: I have to ask; am I really like that?

I told you before we started, all OOCness is to be forgiven. Plus it's a comedy, right?

:twilightsmile: True.

:twilightangry2: He DID burn my entire room down, anyway...

Quite true, and something to be aggravated over. But, do you have anything to say about the story itself?

:twilightsmile: Short, sweet, to the point, and it inspired a chuckle or two. Nothing guffaw or Pinkie-scale ranting laugh worthy, but it got something.

Agreed. I feel like this could have benefitted from becoming a full story though...

:twilightoops: You say that about every story, even the ones that really SHOULDN'T be extended!

Well can you blame me? I feel like there's lost potential in these!

:twilightangry2: Potential that should REMAIN lost!

Ok, ok, the bad gore fics, yes, I agree, fully. They're one-shot gore fests that give blood-lovers a hard on, but COME ON! There are so many one-shots that could have gone way further!

:facehoof: And gone straight into the ground...and kept going, if everypony followed your advice!

*Steel folds his arms and turns his nose up and away from Twilight.*

I stand by my advice.

:twilightsmile: As long as these fanfic writers acknowledge their own story's worth before carrying on with following your advice, I'll be fine.

I thought you loved stories?

:twilightsheepish: There's a difference between 'entertaining' and 'drag', good sir.

I suppose...now erm, I know I had something else to say...

:twilightsmile: Closing comments?

Ah right, yes. Ahem. My opinion on this story? Carried out alright, comedy was the major focus, and as such, the story adhered to it.

:twilightangry2: I never get in bed with another pony THAT fast though!

Have you EVER actually done that?

:twilightoops: Um...no, no I haven't. Still! I wouldn't go that quick! They went on ONE DATE!

Sadly, yes...a fault that every short romance story trips over, I'm sorry to say. Anyway, it achieved some laughter. Not enough to keep my rolling through the story, but it incited some chuckles. Good work.

959610 It is when you take in Twilight's personality

almost died from this almost:pinkiehappy:

So..spike was going to watch them....

959667
It was mention that the reason she was doing it was for science. So, yeah.

I don't mean to be well mean but the story was bad :facehoof: well umm... sorry

1886506
That's gonna cause me some severe mental trauma, man. :raritydespair: :raritycry: :fluttershbad:

hahahahahahahahahahahaha BIG LOSER!!!!!! :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

This pony is a idiot

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